Why Ice Cube Stays Mad in Every Movie w/ Funny Marco | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Summary

2 Bears, 1 Cave: “Why Ice Cube Stays Mad in Every Movie w/ Funny Marco”

Podcast: 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Hosts: Bert Kreischer (A), Tom Segura (not present), with guest Funny Marco (C)
Date: October 13, 2025
Studio: YMH Studios

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Episode Overview

This episode features comedian Bert Kreischer joined by viral comic/host Funny Marco. The conversation dives into generational gaps in comedy, age and fame, the evolution and differences in Black and white comedic movies, the “angry” motif in Ice Cube’s career, the realities and downsides of celebrity, the rise and culture of streaming, strip club anthropology, and unique perspectives on culture, family, online fame, and how internet personalities rise to prominence. Throughout, Funny Marco’s distinct dry humor and observational wit pair well with Bert’s boisterous, self-deprecating style for an episode packed with laughs, cultural observations, and unexpected depth.

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Key Topics & Segments

Guessing Ages, Money, and Looks in Comedy

Timestamp: 00:24–09:49

• Bit: Bert asks Marco to guess his age (“I’m 52”), Tom’s (47), and other comedians/celebrities, sparking discussion about the lingering perceptions of age and how long comedians have been around.

• Celebrity Age Game:

  • “Do you think the more money you get, it helps you not look old?” – Marco (04:49)
  • Running through ages for Oprah (71), Drewski (31), Kevin Hart (46), Samuel Jackson (76), Chris Rock (60), Dane Cook (53).

• Looks in Comedy: Noting there aren’t many “good-looking” comedians:

  • “Matt Rife is number one...[if] he was in his bus with his headsets going, ‘it’s me, I’m the number one best looking comic out there.’” – Bert (08:23)

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Originality in Comedy & Influence

Timestamp: 09:27–11:09

• Discussion of originality: Between Two Ferns, Caleb Presley, and Marco’s own style:
  • “When you make something, it’s original. It’s your thing.” – Bert (09:44)
• Sports Parallels: Comparing innovation in comedy to LeBron vs. Kobe—doing similar things but still original.

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Pop Culture: Crowds, Comedy & Basketball

Timestamp: 10:09–11:49

• LaMelo Ball as an example:
  • “Sometimes it’s not who you are, it’s where you at.” – Marco, about LaMelo needing a new team (10:16)
  • Comparing crowd work comedians—talented “in the room” but material may not translate elsewhere.

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Famous Encounters, Pranks & Celebrity Perceptions

Timestamp: 14:13–20:43

• The burden of fame and surprise interactions:
  • “You wonder if they still remember you.” – Bert, on running into Mike Epps (14:13)
• Cat Williams encounter:
  • “You a rock star taking your shirt off. I’ve been trying to take my shirt off for years; Anwar won’t let me.” – Cat Williams, via Bert’s impression (16:07)
• Getting the Number:
  • Bert tries (and fails) to get Trick Daddy’s number: “‘Yeah, call my people.’” (16:40)
• Nicki Minaj and the Lamborghini Prank:
  • Marco shares how Nicki Minaj DM’d “I got you a Lamborghini” after their interview, only for it to be a prank.
  • “Nobody understands how that is...You know when your daddy say he’s coming back? Probably not.” – Marco (20:11)
  • Bert relates via Donnell Rawlings’ stories.

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The Age-Old “Guess Your Resume”

Timestamp: 21:55–26:55

• Marco reviews Bert’s IMDb:

  • “Let’s do your list. Come on. Let’s see.” – Marco (21:55)
  • Bert explains which of his projects “actually got traction” versus ones with little recognition (e.g. The Cabin on Netflix).

• Making Non-Scripted Shows Work:

  • “It was really a podcast. So the guy was crazy...He was like, ‘What do you do today?’...I said, ‘Donnell’s homophobic and Bobby [Lee] likes to get naked, so we’re gonna have a good time.’” – Bert (23:57)
  • Hilarious stories about the chaos on set leading the original French creator to “walk off”: “He just walked off the set. He goes, ‘This is not my show.’” (25:55)

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Race, Comedy, and the Nature of Trauma in Humor

Timestamp: 30:14–36:48

• Cultural Differences in Comedy:
  • “Our funny is our trauma…we make fun of it.” – Marco (30:14)
  • Comparison: ‘Friday’ is about not being able to pay rent, but made funny; ‘Superbad’ is “awkwardness” for white audiences—“It’s no real situation for real, but it’s funny.”
• Breakdown of “white movies” vs. “black movies”
  • “I don’t know what a lot of white movies are about.” – Marco (32:05)

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The Ice Cube “Mad” Movie Theory

Timestamp: 34:06–37:36

• Why Ice Cube always plays “mad” roles:

  • “Every Ice Cube movie, he has played himself…in Boyz n the Hood, he was mad. Friday, he was mad…Ride Along—mad.” – Marco (34:13)
  • Bert: “Wait, do you think Ice Cube is really like an angry dude?”
    Marco: “Shit, Boyz n the Hood...he was mad in there too, dope boy.” (35:19)
  • Ice Cube’s comedic dynamic in films: always playing the straight, scowling character opposite a zany co-star.

• Hypothetical: “Mad” white comic equivalents:

  • “I bet Bill Burr would be a great Ice Cube.” – Bert (37:21)
  • Other names: Sebastian Maniscalco, Joe Rogan.

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Fame, Everyday Life, & Losing Anonymity

Timestamp: 42:46–50:50

• Do people make celebrities “famous?”
  • “People make you feel like you can’t go to these places anymore...they develop the word ‘famous’ to treat you differently.” – Marco (43:26)
• Michael Jackson’s “grocery store” experiment:
  • “He had to rent out a grocery store with paid actors so he could experience shopping for the first time.” – Marco (45:24)
• Bert and Marco discuss what “gets taken away” by fame:
  • “Getting up and going by myself” - Marco’s favorite freedom (46:57)
  • “I haven’t been alone in seven years.” – Bert, about always being with an entourage (50:17)

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Strip Club Dynamics: White vs. Black

Timestamp: 51:01–56:16

• Power Dynamics of Strippers:
  • “A black girl stripper conducts herself with more power than a white stripper. White stripper comes from a place of...punching down.” – Bert (51:52)
  • “You don’t ever...touch a black chick’s ass twice.” – Bert (52:27)
• Strip club anecdotes: ATM transactions, “ad energy,” and food—Blue Flame’s pancakes/cakes club idea.
• Funny Marco’s proposed strip club: “I would serve pancakes...call the club Cakes.” (56:07)

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Streaming, Content Creation & Internet Fame

Timestamp: 57:13–96:41

• NBA YoungBoy & the culture of streaming:
  • “Right now, they’re calling him like the Michael Jackson...” – Marco (57:27)
• Being Yourself While Famous:
  • “Don’t tell yourself, ‘don’t be weird.’ Be weird. Be you. If you stop yourself from being yourself, it can be weird.” – Marco (59:01)
• Post Malone & Changing Images:
  • “He has so much going on on his face, that I did not recognize him.” – Bert (59:43)
• “You got me fucked up” and Not Caring:
  • “The strongest thing is...the most powerful thing is not giving a fuck.” – Bert (62:03)
• Live Streaming Culture:
  • Kai Cenat and IShowSpeed discussed as content pioneers:
    • “He started streaming from New York and a rat ran across his room…and that blew him up.” – Marco on Kai Cenat (81:57)
    • Fires, viral moments, donations, and the impact on the next gen.
  • “It’s letting kids know you can do this behind the screen…you can get behind.” – Marco (86:11)
  • Twitch economics: “When he streams, you can give like $10, $8, $50…he just getting him to say your name.” (96:13)

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Black Culture Phrases & Comic Language

Timestamp: 69:32–71:33

• “Take me through there”—black phrase meaning “share the details” of a story.
  • “Like, if you’re telling me a story, say, ‘Let me tell you what the...like, take me through there.’” – Marco (70:16)
  • Bert tries to use it with his daughter.

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Childhood, TV, & Random Musings

Timestamp: 74:24–76:57

• Kissing Booths, Cereal Mascots, “Cheers” Etymology:
  • “I never understood Cap’n Crunch. And why ‘Trix are for kids’? Why they never let him eat the cereal?” – Marco (79:44)
  • Funny folk etymologies—“Cheers came from two leaders on a boat…so my liquor getting yours and mine getting in yours.” (74:28)

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Lying, Regional Feuds, and Family

Timestamp: 76:57–80:14

• Joke about ridiculous bridge-building origin for “If your friend jumps off a bridge...”
• Bert shares a story about his wife suspecting jeans, and how bad he is at lying.
• Marco: “Kansas City, Missouri” vs. Kansas City, Kansas: Don’t confuse the two.

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On Streaming, Generations & Audience

Timestamp: 93:13–97:04

• Discussion on who watches streams, fandom on different internet platforms, and generational divides.
  • “I don’t think they’re on TikTok. I think they use Facebook a lot more than Instagram.” – Bert (93:44)
• Business of streaming, tipping culture, and interacting with new, live media economies.

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Philosophical Closer: “Don’t let anyone control your mood”

Timestamp: 97:16–97:51

• “Your time is never over...to receive good, you gotta do good and appreciate bad days to appreciate good ones.” – Marco (97:16)
• “Don’t let anyone be in control of your give a fucks, your mindset, your power...nobody can put me in a mood, you know, but my kids—and I had them.” – Marco (97:34)

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Notable Quotes

• "Our funny is our trauma…we make fun of it. Like ‘Friday’ was about two guys not being able to pay rent." – Funny Marco (30:14)
• “Every Ice Cube movie, he has played himself…he was mad in there too, dope boy.” – Funny Marco (34:13, 35:19)
• “The strongest thing is...the most powerful thing is not giving a fuck.” – Bert (62:03)
• “People make you feel like you can’t go to these places anymore...they develop the word ‘famous’ to treat you differently.” – Funny Marco (43:26)
• “Don’t let anyone be in control of your give a fucks...nobody can put me in a mood but my kids—and I had them.” – Funny Marco (97:34)
• “Take me through there.” – Funny Marco on storytelling (70:16)

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Episode Highlights & Laugh-Out-Loud Moments

• Bert and Marco’s riffing on guessing ages, especially the revelation that Theo Von is 45, with much disbelief and ribbing.
• The Nicki Minaj “Lamborghini” story and the heartbreak that followed; the “your daddy says he’s coming back” analogy drops everyone.
• The “Ice Cube Mad in Every Movie” breakdown—Marco’s rapid listing of roles and Bert’s laughing disbelief.
• Unpacking white versus Black strip clubs, how they feel, and the power dynamic.
• Marco’s description of viral Twitch/YouTube streamer antics, and the real-life/pain/embarrassing moments leading to fame.
• “Take me through there” as a folk catchphrase and Bert’s attempts to use it.
• The philosophical closer about mental power, moods, and controlling your energy.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment & Topic | Timestamp | |-------------------------------------------|--------------------| | Age & Looks Guessing Segment | 00:24 – 09:49 | | On Originality in Comedy | 09:27 – 11:09 | | Black vs. White Comedy Trauma | 30:14 – 36:48 | | Ice Cube “Mad” Movie Theory | 34:06 – 37:36 | | Strip Club Power & Food | 51:01 – 56:16 | | Streaming Culture & How Twitch Works | 81:55 – 97:04 | | Philosophical Life Lessons & Wrap-Up | 97:16 – End |

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Episode Takeaways

• Comedy is always personal: Pain and trauma lead to relatable, enduring humor—especially in Black entertainment.
• Fame is an illusion of access: The public, not celebrities, draw the line of “famous,” shaping what’s possible or out of reach.
• Streaming and the internet have made new stars and fans: From pranks to 24/7 streaming, authenticity (and sometimes chaos) wins out over polish.
• Power in personality, not image: Whether on stage, in a strip club, or Twitch, the person who “doesn’t give a fuck” holds true power.

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Find Funny Marco:
Instagram: @funnymarco
Check show dates there or at funnymarco.net

Classic callback:
“Take me through there…”

Transcript

[A]

Hey, Everybody.

[B]

This Sunday, October 19th, I'll be in Hanover, Maryland at the hall at Live during my Come Together tour. Then next week, I'm coming all across Indiana. Gary on October 23rd, West Lafayette on October 24th, and Fort Wayne on October 25th, and Bloomington October 26th. Get your tickets right now. Atomsgrow.com tour 100%.

[A]

Cheers. You 32?

[C]

Yeah, I'm 32.

[A]

How old do you think I am?

[C]

If I had to put a silent age on it. You talking about silent or like, not for what, I guess, but silent. If I was getting paid.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

If I was getting paid.

[A]

Who do you think is old? You know Tom Segura?

[C]

Uh huh.

[A]

Who do you think's older, me or Tom?

[C]

I'm gonna give. I'm gonna give you. And it's because I see you so much.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, the longer you see somebody so much they start to look there.

[A]

Dude, is that what's happening with mirrors? Yeah. Cuz I. I saw a picture. I saw. And we can definitely lower the AC in here for you. Idiots. Growing spores. Jesus Christ. You ever notice how hot it is in here?

[C]

I try not to think about it.

[A]

For real.

[C]

You don't think with your body. You just got to think with your mind.

[A]

Wow. Yeah, I think with my body.

[C]

Yeah, I see. You've been thinking with your body your whole career. I still think, look, you came in here, you got your titties out right in the wall.

[A]

I think with my body, yeah. Yeah, I think.

[C]

But your body has gotten you far. You're the only person I could say that's got like this like the. I'm trying to say it like in the best way, but you got like a. The sex appeal that nobody wants, but you didn't. Made so much money off of you just being you. And they love it. So it's like you accept who you are. So it's a great idea.

[A]

I'm like White Drewski.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. He should have just got you for the skit.

[A]

It's funny because Drew Ski is like someone who can fall and really hurt himself and laugh it off. And you know, he's walking into the other room going, no, I think I fuck my hip hop. Yeah, yeah, but it's. It's for the joke.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Fuck your whole generation, I think is so fun for me. Like your, Your whole like. I think there, it's. It's funny because you forget how old fuckers are. Yeah, like. Yeah, like Tom's. I think Tom's 47, Theo's 45.

[C]

Hold on.

[A]

Theo is like 45. Yeah. You. He think he looks. He.

[C]

Well, no, Theo is not 45.

[A]

100% Google it. How old's Theo Von? Theo Von's been in the game for a minute. Yeah, he's 45.

[C]

No, he's not.

[A]

Yeah, he is. He. He. Actually, he's. I've known Theo for 20 years. This is hysterical. How old do you think?

[C]

I wish I had his new number. I will call him.

[A]

I have his new number.

[C]

Can you call him? He's really 45.

[A]

How old did you think he was?

[C]

Not that. Like, that's. He's about to be 50.

[A]

He's about. But it's okay to be 50?

[C]

No, it's. It's okay. It's a catfish. Cause it's a catfish.

[A]

You're closer to Theo. You and Theo are friends.

[C]

He's 45. Yeah, I think the world don't know that.

[A]

No, I don't think the world knows that. I don't think he. Yeah, I don't. I mean, I don't think he goes out and tells people his age, but he doesn't hide it. I mean, he's been in the media for his entire life.

[C]

Yeah, so is freaking Orlando Brown. He's not 45. Who.

[A]

Who's Orlando Brown? Orlando Brown. The guy that sold Sprites?

[C]

No, that's from Disney Channel. That's a Raven.

[A]

I mean, who's. Who am I thinking of? Orlando. No.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Orlando Brown's 37. How old's Chris Brown? How old's Chris Brown? Chris Brown's 36. Wow.

[C]

I did not know that.

[A]

Shut the fuck up. I'm blown away that you thought Theo was. You thought Theo was.

[C]

Chris Brown is sexy, though.

[A]

Who, Chris Brown? Yeah. Chris Brown's so talented. Yeah.

[C]

Sexy too, right?

[A]

Yeah, I think so.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Type shit. What else? Age. Let's see. This is a guess of age. Let's see somebody else.

[A]

How old do you think Rogan is?

[C]

Ooh, Steph Rogan?

[A]

No, Joe.

[C]

Oh, Joe Rogan.

[A]

Theo's older than Seth Rogen.

[C]

58. 60.

[A]

He's almost 60. Yeah.

[C]

Do you think the more money you get, it helps you, like, not look old?

[A]

Yeah, I think so.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

How much money do you think I have? More money or age?

[C]

You got more money?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You definitely look your age.

[A]

I look my age? Yeah.

[C]

Wait, are you 63?

[A]

I'm 52.

[C]

I was close.

[A]

That's not close. Yeah, 52.

[C]

But that's amazing. You still look good.

[A]

I look good for 52. Tom is. How old is Tom Segura. He's 47. I think 46. Tom's a year older than Theo, but he looks old as fuck compared to Theo.

[C]

Yeah. Oprah Winfrey.

[A]

How old's Oprah?

[C]

Let's guess, let's guess.

[A]

Okay. 73. 71.

[C]

63.

[A]

71. God. Fucking nailed it.

[C]

Oh, my God. This is really.

[A]

Wait, how old's Drewski? He's gotta be 27.

[C]

No, no, it's 33. 34.

[A]

31. 31. Okay. Kevin Hart. Kevin Hart.

[C]

Hang on, hang on.

[A]

Don't Google it yet. Kevin Hart. 47.

[C]

I got 47.

[A]

Hold on, hold on, hold on. Don't. Don't Google 47. I'm doing the math. I was 26. He was probably 21.

[C]

You cheating?

[A]

Oh, no, no. I'm doing the math. When I met him, I was 25. When I met him, 21. I'm guessing he was 21 because I think he was drinking. No, he wasn't drinking. Lil Keb is what they called him. I'm gonna say he is 46.

[C]

Did I say. What did I.

[A]

What did you say?

[C]

I think I said 46.

[A]

46. Yeah, 46. God damn. He's done a lot of 46. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, let's do this one. Oh, wow. He been. Oh. All my life. Samuel Jackson.

[A]

Oh. Oh, he's gotta be 82. Yeah, 82. I'm gonna say 85. 85.

[C]

85.

[A]

85. He's so old. He married his niece. Wow.

[C]

Are they together?

[A]

Morgan Freeman. Okay, we'll do Morgan Freeman next. Wow. Sammy Jackson's got to be 81.

[C]

I'm gonna do 80. 85. They don't have it.

[A]

76. 76.

[C]

He's been old all my life.

[A]

Yeah, he has been old. Do you remember. Do you remember Jungle. Jungle Fever. Jungle Fever. He was in Jungle Fever. Right. He played the crackhead.

[C]

Probably so. Oh, Chris Rock. What about Chris Rock?

[A]

Oh, he's got to be. I bet he's 57. 57. I bet he's 60. I bet he's 60.

[C]

I'm with you.

[A]

60. 60. Boom. Chris Rock. Okay, out of everyone's name, he probably looks the best.

[C]

Who do you feel like the sexiest comedian is?

[A]

That's male. Yeah, male comedian. I. I mean, like, now, hang on. Do we quantify. Don't. Don't type it before we've said it. Do. Do we quantify? Like, do they have to be. You have to know who they are, right?

[C]

No, no, just even. I just had to agree with you. Like, oh, wow.

[A]

I think one of the best looking Comedians out there. God.

[C]

Funny. All comedians are funny looking.

[A]

No, Jeff Dye is good looking.

[C]

Let's look him up.

[A]

Jeff Dye is attractive.

[C]

Okay. Wow. Yeah.

[A]

I'll tell you. I'll tell you, Jeff Dye's a good looking dude. I think it kind of hindered him when he was younger because he was clean and he was good looking. I'm trying to think out of New York, who's good looking. There's not a lot of good looking comics.

[C]

Yeah, that's what I said. Yeah.

[A]

All right. But with black comics, there are. Chris Rock's a good looking dude. Matt Rife. Matt Rife. Matt Rife. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Matt Rife is number one. By the way. If Matt Rife's list, you know, he was in his. In his bus with his headsets going, it's me, it's me. I'm number one. I'm the number one best looking comic out there. Dane Cook was a sex pot when he was at it. Wow. Now, how old do you think Dane Cook is?

[C]

Dane Cook, 53.

[A]

He's probably 52. 53. God dang. And I know him.

[C]

He was definitely. Was he a comedian? The dude that just came out with the Netflix special where they did all the drugs?

[A]

Who's that.

[C]

From? Between Two Friends.

[A]

Zach Alvarez.

[C]

No, no, no, no, no. What's his name? He was. He just had. He got a Netflix documentary where he said he did a lot of drugs. Charlie Sheen was sexy too. I know that.

[A]

Charlie Sheen was.

[C]

Yeah, Charlie Sheen was.

[A]

Wait, did you say between. You said Between Two Friends.

[C]

What was the show called?

[A]

It was called Two and a Half Men. Yeah, same thing. But there was Between Two Ferns. Yeah. Did you ever see Between Two.

[C]

Yeah, I like that.

[A]

That's good. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, I love it.

[A]

Did you ever see the original? No, I don't mean original. And I mean, I don't mean this like, because you can't really say anything on the Internet. Yeah. Say pull it, clip it. Make you feel like you're talking about a guy you love.

[C]

Click for me.

[A]

Yeah, I. I love Zach. Between Two Furnace is original. I think Caleb Presley's original. I think you're an original. I think everything's what you do. When you make something. You can be a student of the game and learn from other people, but when you make something, it's original. It's your thing.

[C]

I think it's original because it's you doing it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But again, that's like LeBron James and Kobe. They do the same thing, but they're original because it's Their personality.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, and they.

[A]

And they both. You know, I was. I just got into a deep dive on. Yesterday was mellow ball, yellow ball. And I was like, oh, he's amazing. And then someone texted me. They're like, no, it's just highlights. Like, his team sucks.

[C]

No, he really. He really is good.

[A]

Is he?

[C]

Yeah. He know how to play. Like, he know how to dribble. You know how to shoot.

[A]

He's so fun to watch.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. And then it's just. Charlotte, sometimes it's not like, who you are, it's where you at.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. I just feel like you got to change. You got to go to a new team.

[A]

Is it like crowd work? When you watch someone do crowd work, you're like, God, that guy's good.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, and then you're like, oh, his material sucks.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Like, he's. He can't. He can't do the easy stuff.

[C]

That's what I said. Material. Look at that. Okay, let's see.

[A]

This is. He's so.

[C]

Look how he dribble. Look, he dribbles so. And he know how to pass without looking like, look. Look at that. It's nice. You want to know who you remind me of? Like, Patrick Mahomes. Yeah. Of like, how he plays like the young Patrick Mahomes when he's going crazy.

[A]

I love his fucking long three pointers where he kind of steps away from it with one foot.

[C]

That's how Patrick Mahomes was in his primes.

[A]

I think he's still in his prime.

[C]

It's kind of. It's.

[A]

He wasn't last night, but it was.

[C]

It was a good game.

[A]

It was a great game.

[C]

Yeah, it was a bad loss for me, but that's.

[A]

What did you bet.

[C]

I almost did Lil Duval. Almost better, though. Thank God I didn't.

[A]

Little Duval. How old is a little Duval? Oh, Lord. He's got to be older than me.

[C]

He got to be 60.

[A]

He's got to be 63.

[C]

Lil Duvall gotta be 60.

[A]

63. He's been out at 48.

[C]

Wow. Oh, my God.

[A]

All right, well, let's guess how tall he is.

[C]

Lil Duvall is.

[A]

I'm guessing 411 pop feet. I'm go under five feet. I'm gonna go under five feet, and I'm gonna say 112 pounds.

[C]

Oh, five, two.

[A]

Oh, wow. How much does he weigh?

[C]

You wanna know who's aging right in front of me? Mike Epps.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

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[A]

When did making plans get this complicated? It's time to streamline with WhatsApp, the secure messaging app that brings the whole group together. Use polls to settle dinner plans. Send event invites and pin messages so no one forgets mom 60th and never miss a meme or milestone. All protected with end to end encryption. It's time for WhatsApp message privately with everyone. Learn [e-mail] I knew. I've known Mike Epps for 20. You know what's so funny is when you meet someone, like, when you're not like, you, you, you. I know that you. There's a period where you weren't famous, but you pop pretty quick. Right? Right. When you aren't famous and you meet someone who then becomes famous and then you know them, like, for 20 years, but you've seen them blow up. Yeah. You wonder if they still remember you. Like, yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

That happened with me and, like, Craig Robinson and Mike Epps. I saw my gaps at a party. He was like, birdie, Burt. And I was like. I was like, you remember me? That's like.

[C]

It makes you. Like, yes. Like, what the fuck?

[A]

Yeah, it makes. And he's like, yeah, fuck, yeah, I remember you. But you, you know, you had a moment with them, but you just go like, it was. They must have that with me.

[C]

Oh, you got the Me Cat Williams yet?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

How was it? Can you talk me through the experience?

[A]

It was.

[C]

Can you use this voice?

[A]

Too burnt. You a rock star, motherfucker. You had a white baklava on the R. Kelly mask. What's the baklava? Is it a baklava? Type in. Type in Cat Williams, white baklava. I'm almost certain you'll see the exact same one he was wearing. What's up? What's it called? What's the thing black dudes wear so they don't get their ops?

[C]

Oh, ski mask.

[A]

Oh, yeah, Ski mask. Balacaba. That's it. That's the actual one.

[C]

Oh, he had that on.

[A]

He came up. I mean, I knew it was him, obviously.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

He comes up and he's like, burt Kreisler, you're a rock star. N word. And I said, oh, thank you. I go, you know, I was. I literally was like, you know who I am? He was like, fuck, yeah. You a rock star taking your shirt off. I've been trying to take my shirt off for years. Anwar won't let me. I can't even wear a vest on stage. Burke Christian, keep doing you, man. I love it. And I was like, I was. I was through the roof.

[C]

Can you tell me a time that you asked somebody for their number, like a celebrity where you was like, damn, I want to get his number. And you got it.

[A]

And I got it.

[C]

Yeah. Or you got turned on.

[A]

Oh, oh, oh, I just did. I just did a good one the other day. I wish I could remember who it was. I did a good one the other day, and I asked for Trick Daddy's number. Oh, wow. I was like, yo, man, we should keep up. He's like, yeah, call my people. Wait, what about you? You've interviewed everybody.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You've interviewed. You've interviewed people I know.

[C]

And I go, I'm still laughing at the Trick Daddy thing. That's funny.

[A]

He's like, yeah, call my people. Yeah, you got him. You got me. Yeah, you got me. Right? Like, the way he did is like, we're here right now. Yeah, this happened. Do it again. Yeah, but you've interviewed people that I go like that I always. That I like, but I don't know anything about. And I go, I want to know what they're really like. Right, right. Because, like, if you said to me, like, people always go, what's Joe like? Like, for most people, I just go, he's the sweetest guy. You know, whatever.

[C]

But, like, he the type. He is who he is on the Internet.

[A]

He's intense.

[C]

Yeah. I feel like he listening to Joe Rogan. I feel like.

[A]

No.

[C]

Nicki Minaj. Nicki Minaj?

[A]

You interviewed Nicki Minaj? She's fucking.

[C]

When I tell you. Let me tell you what Nicki Minaj did to me. I never talked about this story. Nicki Minaj. And right there, click on the Lambo. Right there. That right there. I asked her for a Lamborghini and she said, okay, I'll get it for you. The interview comes out. You know, my life is changing. I, like, cut off my grandma. Cut off everybody.

[A]

Well, and that interview came. Yeah.

[C]

Cause my life changed. I let go of my family.

[A]

Cause you interviewed Nicki Minaj. Your phone blows up.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Your podcast drops. When? Yeah, on Mondays.

[C]

No, it was random. It was because she had to approve it. And I pissed her off because I did a preview clip and I posted it. I was so excited. And she said, by the way, I didn't approve this. And I'm like, oh, my God. I'm like, fuck, I need to take it down. And then I'm DM a lot. I'm sorry, Nikki. I was so excited. Like, like, thank God it didn't, like, go out of proportion. But, yeah, around Christmas time, it was 1:00am I'm asleep and I'm getting calls. I'm getting calls. And then I. They're like, check your phone. I go. I go, I go on Instagram, Nicki Minaj says, I got you a Lamborghini. And I'm like, oh, my. And I'm sitting outside and I'm like, I hope it's outside. Like. And I'm praying. I'm like, oh. Before I look out the window, I'm like, oh, my God, she really got me a Lamborghini. Like, I'm at the shit on these hoes, so. And I'm like, I'm so excited. You don't understand. I'm at the window, like, one o', clock, I got woke up out of my sleep, and. And I look outside, nothing there. So I'm like, all right, okay, maybe it's. And I go outside. I'm in my boxers. I'm looking. And my heart was so broken. And it was just like. It was like, what? Like, when did she start joking like that? That's like, why she do that to me? You know what I'm saying? I'm like, why? 1am she's thinking about me. Because I thought it was real.

[A]

I'm like, biggest gift. Appreciate you.

[C]

Yeah. I was mad after that.

[A]

Look outside. You're with me right now. Surprise.

[C]

And that's what said. You see the biggest. Appreciate you. No lol, nothing. I was so upset. Like, biggest girl appreciate. And it was like, why is she thinking about me? So I thought it was real, like, you know what I'm saying? Like, if you did that to me, I'd be like, damn, bro, he really fucks with me. Look, we had a good time. We smiling and selfies. I was like, yes. I'm like, I'm a barb.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

And that shit made me feel like shit. And nobody understand how that is for somebody. You know when your daddy say he's coming back? Probably not.

[A]

No, I don't. I know. Can I tell you what I. When you said that, I do know what that is, but only because I'm friends with Donnell.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And he's told me what that feels like.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And immediately I went, I know that feeling is. Sitting on the stoop, my dad's coming get me. Yeah.

[C]

It's like he came back, but he came back with more kids.

[A]

And presents for them. Yeah.

[C]

It's crazy.

[A]

And that was that. The interview that popped? No.

[C]

Orlando Brown.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Orlando Brown. It was him. He was. When I tell you, he was, like, all over the place. Like, Orlando Brown clips were like, look like, I'm on the mic. He sucked the mic randomly.

[A]

For people who don't know who Orlando Brown is. Tell them who he is.

[C]

He's from. That's so Raven.

[A]

Oh, yeah, I remember him.

[C]

Yeah. So. And he's just iconic.

[A]

Like, there's that whole generation of, like, Kiki Keke Palmer.

[C]

Yeah, Kiki Palmer.

[A]

And they're all from those. Those Nickelodeon shows.

[C]

I don't know Keke Palmer. I don't think. Where did Keke Palmer blow up from?

[A]

She was on.

[C]

I don't think she was there from the TV show. Cause I remember for a long shot, she been acting for so long. By the way, she's a good person, too.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

She has done so much stuff.

[A]

She has. She had that new movie on Instagram.

[C]

Don't that feel good that you can Google and say the list.

[A]

Go on.

[C]

I would never have that.

[A]

Yeah, you will.

[C]

I mean, it's too late.

[A]

No, it's not. How old are you?

[C]

What? 30? 32.

[A]

32. I'm 52. I've been in two things.

[C]

Let's do your list. Come on. Let's see.

[A]

Oh, my list sucks for Chrysler.

[C]

See? Oh, hold on. Wow.

[A]

Specials.

[C]

But that's good. That's. Is that you?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Who's that dude at the bottom? Auto at the bottom. That's not you.

[A]

History of the joke. It was a. It's just everything I've ever been in.

[C]

Okay. Okay. But why don't they have your picture?

[A]

Because it's. I was just. I was just like a talk.

[C]

I know, but it still would have just been.

[A]

It would have been nice if it's Louis, it's Lewis Black of a lifetime. Trip Flip. This is all. The Cinderella story I produced myself. Best in Town was a show.

[C]

What was your mom? Which one? Then you know all this. Like, this is.

[A]

I'll show you. All this is fake. All this is fake. Birth. The con. I mean, not fake, but it's just, like. It's like stuff I was kind of in.

[C]

So you got, like, a shot.

[A]

Like, hey, yeah. Like, nothing really big. And then I, right there, hurt. Bert was my first. That's wrong. That's actually Bert the Conqueror. That was my first TV show where, like, they put marketing budget behind it. And then after that, the next thing is specials. It's the machine. It's comfortably dumb. It's hey, big boy. It's razzle dazzle. It's secret time. And then razz. And then the big thing. And then the cabin was, like, the first thing I ever made that got traction. That, like, people watched and liked. And that was on Netflix. It was during it, I took, you know, honestly to be dead. Honest with you. It's a show that you could easily do. Is we supposed to be scripted about me and comics going to a cabin in the woods and experiencing things?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And we couldn't get a cast in time, so we couldn't script it because we couldn't write it because we know the people. Yeah. So we just went to a cabin with comics and we just did live podcasts.

[C]

Why don't you still keep going? What happened? Just a time.

[A]

The way I, I, I'm, I'm speaking out of my ass, but I think the way Hollywood works is when you have a hit and then you leave the network, no one wants to bring your hit back because it's not theirs. They want to create their own hits.

[C]

Yes. Okay.

[A]

So I always wanted to bring it back, but the guy that created it left. I think he's in the UK now. So the guy that he is very complicated. But the, it was a spin off of a French show. There was a French co called Le Cabon. And I know that sounds crazy, but we, we got the rights from them because this guy had done this great thing called Traveling with my Father with Jack Whitehall and he loved Le Cabon, which is a French show. They brought it to America, they brought it to me. It was supposed to be scripted, but we couldn't come up with script, so I just brought comics. So it was really a podcast. So the guy was crazy. Is the guy who created the show Le Cabon? Am I saying it right? They said, how do you say the cabin? Okay. Le Cabang. He came to see his show. His show. He was like, I want to see you in production. I met him and he was like, what? So how do you do today? What do you do today? And I said, well, I have Bobby Lee and Donnell Rollins. And he's like, and what will you do? And I was like, well donell, Donnell's homophobic and Bobby likes to get naked, so we're gonna have a good time.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And he was like, huh?

[C]

You got them two together?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh wow. I gotta watch that.

[A]

And so we started the episode with Bobby sitting naked in my lap and Donnell walking in and then walking immediately out. And he goes, I don't, I don't get why that's funny. And I was like, well, cuz Donnell doesn't like naked.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

The next thing we did was we put a tube up my and we put cough. We did a coffee. We did a coffee.

[C]

Let's just say it. Like just sit in a moment real quick. If we can just sit in, like, silence for a little bit.

[A]

Of course. Just let me know when you're ready. And what. What happened? We did a coffee enema.

[C]

No, no. What did you put? Like, let me see if I heard it right.

[A]

So we put an enema. So he put a tube in my asshole and poured coffee into my asshole, and it goes into my body. And then I laughed and I shit it out all over the place. And the dude who created this show that was a scripted show walked off the set. He goes, this is not my show. He just walked off. And I was like, hey, thank you, man. It was good meeting you. The next thing, as he was walking off, Bobby and Donnell were pretending to be each other's fathers in scream therapy. And Donnell was just doing a horrifically racist Korean accent, and Bobby was doing a horribly black accent. Sorry, I'm in jail, Donnell. I can't raise you down now. And he's like, oh, Bobby, you are disappointment. And so the guy walked off. But. Yeah, but that's the reason you don't want to do the show or that maybe. I don't know, man. I don't know. And then the machine I made, it's.

[C]

Still on Netflix right now.

[A]

Yeah, it's good. It's really funny. Like, you'd like it. You like? Yeah, Because I think you have a. It's interesting because I heard. I watched your podcast with Theo. I do. I love Theo and I. And I think his podcast interviews with guys like you are really good. Yeah, really good. Caleb Presley. And he's really good at that.

[B]

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[A]

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[C]

How come I feel like where our funny is is our trauma. So it was something I always think, like our, our movies are things that we go through and we make fun of it. Like Friday was about two guys getting put out, not being able to pay rent.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That's the sad situation we hear. But they made it funny.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So it's like. And then it's like I had to think of another one. Like.

[A]

I just broke down the best black movies.

[C]

Like Girls trip. Like them it was like two girls, like, they all go on a trip and it goes wrong, and they all start falling out with each other. But they made it funny. So I could say, our culture, we go through things, and we. In real life, if you just heard it, you're like, damn, that's fucked up. But we make it funny. And when you think about Superbad, it's like, what the fuck is that movie about? It was just a lot of awkward McLovin fake IDs. And it was funny. Like, it was awkwardness. Cause it's no real situation for real. But it's funny. Like stepbrothers. That's not a bad thing. You like, oh, I got stepbrother. We don't like each other. That's not all. But they made it funny. So it's like, in our culture, I feel like we learn to go through things and we make it funny. Cause it's like, y' all can relate through this.

[A]

That's really fascinating. Cause, yeah. When you look at Superbad, it's basically about two guys trying to lose their virginity, or one guy trying to lose their virginity, another guy lying to his buddy, saying, I'm not going to the same college.

[C]

Yeah. It's like a clusterfuck.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And it's awkwardly funny. So, like, I feel like. And, you know, in the culture, it's different. Like, our culture, we make fun of our pain. And then when you look at movies like Superbad, it's like. It's random shit. Superbad. What's that? I still don't know what this movie about. What's that called? Pineapple Express. It's like weed getting high. Yeah. And it was just like. But. And speaking of movies.

[A]

Yeah. Wait. I don't know what Pineapple Express is about.

[C]

I don't know what a lot of white movies are about.

[A]

That's so funny.

[C]

But it's like the storyline, it's just like. You don't. It's not a plot or end. It's like his drug dealer. He runs with his drug dealer. He's seen a murder. I don't even know what his job was at the beginning.

[A]

For real? Yeah. That is a really convoluted.

[C]

So I feel like some. Like, you know, in the culture.

[A]

But it's a brilliant yes in. In. In a script.

[C]

But when you're reading it, you're like, what the is this?

[A]

So wait. Okay. This is a really interesting conversation. So what happens in. In white movies is they make funny scenes, funny sketches, and what they're looking for is, like, almost like, can you.

[C]

Type in top black comedian movies? And I'mma break down. Like, I want to go through top black, black, black. They was scared to type that.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay, so look. All right, let me go down some of these. All right, Like Friday, right? Friday was. That's Ice Cube and Smokey right there, right? Yep, that was about Friday. Oh, my God. Friday was him and his friend, he got fired on his day off. And his friend Smokey, which is Chris Tucker, comes over and he puts him in another situation. He like, since you got fired, let's smoke this weed, man. They smoked the weed, but he smoked Chris Tucker, like, the weed man plug, which he's supposed to be selling it. Now he got him in another problem. Now they trying to kill both of them.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So, like, that would, like, like, some shit that, like, that was some fucked up shit to do.

[A]

Like, describe Madea for me.

[C]

Madea, like, you know, basically just breaking.

[A]

Down a black family system and saying.

[C]

Yes, like that, grandma. That just keep the family together. But, like. But it's a lot of sad shit going on.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

No grandma.

[A]

All these are black movies. All right, CB4. CB4 is probably the most relatable.

[C]

Oh, I heard that was when he played the cranky. I never got to watch it, though.

[A]

But early Chris Rock as an actor was, I think is really fucking good. Although his top five movie is an.

[C]

Amazing fucking movie type of Ice Cube movies. Let me tell you something about Ice Cube. Let me tell you something, and I'm gonna point this out.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Every Ice Cube movie he has played himself, nobody else. And I'm gonna tell you, look, first fight, look. All right, let's go down to the bottom. Boy's n the Hood. He was mad.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Friday, he was mad. In the condas, he was mad Inaconda. He was mad I got the hookup. That's like a look.

[A]

Players club.

[C]

He was a pimp. Yeah. He was mad. He got into fights.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Friday after next, he was mad. All about Benjamin.

[A]

He was mad.

[C]

Barbershop mad. Like the shop was shutting down again. Friday after next, mad again. Barbershop mad again. Are we there yet? Didn't fuck with the kids. Mad. First Sunday mad at him for that. Mad with Keke Palmer. He was mad. Jake is promoters. He was mad. He was a janky promoter ride along mad. He was mad at them. He didn't like Kevin Hart mad. It keeps going up. First fight, he didn't like him mad.

[A]

Oh, he's so cute.

[C]

He didn't like. No. His second cast that he was. He Never liked him.

[A]

Wait, do you think Ice Cube is really like an angry dude?

[C]

Shit poison hood. It was like a mad. He was mad in there too, dope boy. He does not like. It's not no movie where you see him like, yeah, man, it's no one movie. Ride Along 2.

[A]

Lottery ticket. Lottery ticket. Is that the one where Mike Epps gets the lottery ticket?

[C]

Yes. No, no, no, no, he was in that one. That's Bow Wow movie. But he's in there. But I'm saying every movie all about.

[A]

The Benjamins is where Mike Epps gets.

[C]

Yes, that's where he was a bounty hunter mad trying to get every co host said he was next to Are we there yet? He did not like them kids. One thing about Ice Cube, he always had a part two to movies. These mad movies.

[A]

How much money you think? Ice Cube? How old do you think Ice Cube is?

[C]

Ice cube gotta be 71. But he's a genius because he made it through Hollywood with being himself 56. 56. Oh shit.

[A]

He's younger than Joe Rogan.

[C]

I know that's fuck. Sorry, Cube, but he's younger than. What I'm trying to say here, Jay, is to be able to go through Hollywood and say, I don't need no script, I got it. I don't like him. Yeah, he didn't like Kevin, he didn't like Kevin Hart. He didn't like Mike eps, he didn't like Chris Tucker. All these are legend. And it was so dope how they played off each other. But he just came in like, I'm not going to like you. And like 21 jumpsuit.

[A]

It's such a good, it's such a comic, great comic trope is the goofy, crazy, loose, silly fun versus no.

[C]

Yeah, it's like a good duo.

[A]

It's a good comic trope.

[C]

Yeah, it's a good. It's like the duo.

[A]

That's fucking awesome.

[C]

Yeah, he just been like. And I said nobody ever called this out, but Ice Cube, don't be happy. And even look at the covers of the movies. Look at him, he's mad on the covers. Click on Ride Along.

[A]

Look at the COVID of Ride Along.

[C]

Like, like first fight mad. Like he's never like, look at like he's mad through all that.

[A]

Who. Okay, if you had to replace. Let's do this. If you had to replace that with white actors, who would be the mad white actor?

[C]

Oh, that's a good question.

[A]

I bet Bill Burr would be a great Ice Cube. Ah yeah, Bill Burr would be a great one. Sebastian Maniscalco.

[C]

Yeah. Look him up. Let me see.

[A]

Rogan would be Ice Cube.

[C]

Steph Rogan. Yeah.

[A]

No, Joe Rogan.

[C]

Yeah. Oh, shit. Sorry, Stephanie.

[A]

If Joe Rogan still acted.

[C]

Yeah. I could see him being that one.

[A]

Cause Sebastian's got, like a. Not to, like. Not to quantify, but, like, his whole thing's like, who does that? Yeah, why do you do that? The fuck's wrong with you? Yeah, he'd be good.

[C]

Smash him.

[A]

Be good.

[C]

How do you feel about. How do you say his name from Superbad? What's his name, the main character?

[A]

Jonah Hill.

[C]

Yeah, Jonah Hill. Like, his career has. Like, he has been so many people, he has changed.

[A]

I think it's Jonah Hill.

[C]

Yeah. Jonah Hill.

[A]

Jonah. Jonah Hill.

[C]

I feel like he got to a point where he was that person where everybody thought he just wanted to change his image and his whole character. Like, he was that goofy guy, and I feel like he wanted to say, it's a different version of me. See the one with the glasses and, like, with him losing weight, I feel like if somebody. You can get him on his podcast, I feel like he got a story to tell. I feel like he wanted to get away from this character where he was known. And I feel like he started to, you know, be something else. That's just me being a fan looking in.

[A]

I'm a real fan. Like, I'll tell you what.

[C]

But you feel like it didn't change, like, how his movies changed?

[A]

Oh, yeah, and I'm glad it did. Like, when you look at him, I. I said this when I did my first movie. I said, they, like, who do you want to work with next? I said, I don't give a fuck about working with anyone. And my director was like. My producer was like, no. Like, if you could work with someone. I think every white guy's answer is always. It's always going to be Danny McBride or Owen Wilson or what's the Vince Vaughn? Jonah Hill, in my opinion, is the best improv actor that's ever been out. Every take he does, and I've never worked with him, but from what I hear is a little bit different than the other one. And he comes in with so many options. And when you watch Superbad and you watch the outtakes of him doing that rant, that is all improv.

[C]

It's like, Drew Ski.

[A]

Yeah. And. And so when you're that good and. And it's gotta suck to be typecast as. And then we'll have this fat guy and you're like, well, hold on, I'm Actually a brilliant actor. Yeah. And like. No, no, I know, I know, I know. But. And because Hollywood doesn't write brilliant actor. They write fat guy. Like, trust me, I've gotten a lot of Santa Claus scripts.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah. A lot. And I can see it. So can Hollywood. But, like, the scripts I get are, like. Are pretty much one thing, because that's what they're doing. And Jonah was like, I. I don't need the money anymore. And I don't need your. Also your description of me. I want to be who I want to be.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And I don't. And I don't want to be trapped in this body. Dude. When I lost weight the first time, I lost a ton of weight. People like, you ruined your career of 40, 50 pounds. And I was like, I remember. Good. Some of my best friends said, you just up your stand up. I was like, what? They're like, can't take your shirt off anymore. I was like, why not? They're like, cuz, look at your shoulders. But some of my best friends were.

[C]

Like, you do they expect you to get bigger?

[A]

Like, they just want me to be fatter.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. And I. I think they want me to be fatter. So they're happy.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

I don't think they want me to be fatter. I think so.

[C]

They know the money still there, I guess.

[A]

I don't know. But this is me, like, my skinniest on the right. And that's me on my fattest yesterday. And then. But like. And I think Jonah Hill probably was just like, yo, I'm going to make my own path.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And it sucks. Like, people go. People may say to you, like, yo, we're looking for, like, someone just to be deadpan and just sit there and be quiet and just be funny. That way they don't know how you're funny. They can't quantify how you're funny. They just know it works. And they go, yo, we need someone to do this, this, this. Hey. You come and do this, and then they tell you do your thing. And you're.

[C]

I didn't know my phone was on.

[A]

Did you just take five pictures? Yeah.

[C]

You will. Look. Look at him.

[A]

Who's that?

[C]

Look.

[A]

What's up? Hey. Hey, what's up? What? How you doing?

[C]

I'm still trying to figure it out.

[A]

What's that?

[C]

And he say, what the hell? Will he see you? Jesus. You see him? And he said, what the hell to you? Who is that?

[A]

The.

[C]

What the hell, man?

[A]

What the hell?

[C]

He got my number one time. And I Didn't know. He's like, oh. He's like, what the hell? Like, he called me on accident.

[A]

He called you? He goes, what the hell?

[C]

Yes. And then he calls me all the time.

[A]

Did anyone see what he looks like?

[C]

I'll try to call him.

[A]

Two rows of teeth. One there and one here. Am I right?

[C]

The camera's right there. That's. I don't see. And then he picks up what he want.

[A]

He doesn't pick up for what? Oh, what up? What up?

[C]

What the hell? What's up, man?

[A]

What the hell?

[C]

Okay. All right. That's all he says. What the hell? He calls you at seven in the morning all the time. What the hell?

[A]

Where's he from?

[C]

Minnesota. I start really talking.

[A]

Do you like being famous?

[C]

See, this is my thing. I feel like when I. And this is like something I talk about in my standup, where it's like, people don't realize that they're famous. People make you famous. And I don't think. And I'm gonna use the name I don't think. Like, Beyonce woke up one day and said, look, I can't go to Walmart no more. I can't. Or I can't go to Target. I feel like when you go do what you normally do, they act like you shouldn't be there. And that's when they make you famous. Like what? Like, I go to TJ Maxx, I'm in there, and they're like, what you doing in this motherfucker?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'm like, I'm trying to get a discount, like you.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then I'm shopping with my daughter, like, what you doing in here? And I feel like people make you feel like, I can't go to these places no more. Yeah. And they develop the word famous to make. Treat you differently. Like, I feel like we're all the same. I'm good for my talent, you're good for yours. But people like, I'm at the airport, like, what you doing here? I gotta get on a flight.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, you sitting coach.

[C]

Don't use the bathroom. Be like, what you doing in here? And you hold your own dick.

[A]

You sitting coach? You're like, you sitting in coach?

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Oh, shit's not going good.

[C]

So now it's like, oh, God. And then the kind of car you drive, what you doing in that? And that's why I said, people, if we understood it's okay to be known for your talent and just be like, I love what you do. Keep doing it. Hey, man, keep going. It'd Be like, oh, shit, it's cool. But when you like sitting back and they filming you and they this and that, what you doing? I just feel like I'm thankful to be this. And I'm thankful that you appreciate what I do. And I love. Thank you. And I want everybody to know you can chase your dreams. That's that. But I don't never feel like I'm better than nobody. But certain people make you that way. And that's like, young jock. He was doing Uber. Like, what he doing? Ubering. What if he just wanted to do Uber one day? So I feel like people develop the word famous on the people.

[A]

That's interesting.

[C]

Yeah. Like, you can't just go do nothing. Like, you can't just walk down the street. Well, I was about to say, with your shirt off, you could. But, like, if I was walking down the street with my shirt off, sweating, and it was like, well, he on drugs. What's wrong with him? Like, I can't just do what. And it takes away. Like, I couldn't have lived. Like, bro, I'm watching literally, Michael Jackson. Can you look up? Michael Jackson creates. He created the own store. He bought a grocery store. He rented out a grocery store. Say rented out a grocery store and put paid actors in there so he can go shopping for the first time. And I'm watching it. And this was like, he had to do that because he never been shopping before. And that's why I said, it's like, imagine seeing Michael Jackson anywhere at Walmart. They gonna be like, what he doing? Look who it is. And he's not gonna be able to shop. But he.

[A]

That's. This is crazy to say.

[C]

And I look at this. He really was happy 2003. And he was, like, happy. He rented out that and had paid actors in there. Cause he never went grocery shopping before. They were shopping. So it felt like, you know, it was a real environment. Had people in there that I knew pretending as if they were shopping. So it felt like, you know, it was a real environment. Had my cousins dressed like they were bag boys, and I went shopping. It was great. They planned everything right down to the music. Zach, all you want to do is go to the grocery store.

[A]

Yeah. Now people know who you are when.

[C]

You put the glove on.

[A]

Wow. What would be your version of this? Like, let's say. Let's say every dream you've ever put in your journal comes true this month, this year, by this 2026, you're in a movie with Ice Cube called Man, that guy's Angry.

[C]

Right, right.

[A]

And it's the hit movie and you're. And you got. Everyone's like, you're the shit. And you can't go out and do the things. Like, what would be your thing that you love doing?

[C]

Oh, that get taken away.

[A]

Yeah, it got taken away.

[C]

Oh, that's a good way. Getting up and going by myself. I get up and go a lot by myself. And it's taken away now where it's like, I had to have somebody with me. I feel like I can't be like, imagine Dave Chappelle by itself anywhere. It's impossible. Like, so imagine when you get that famous. Because I'm like, D famous. Like, damn, he's still going. Like.

[A]

Keep going.

[C]

Yeah, see?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It's not like A, like, we accept you. Like a list is like, we accept you. Like, we love you here. Like, you know, C is like, you know, like, catch up. Like, catch up to A.

[A]

What's B?

[C]

Like, bitch, you on the way. I'm D. You know, but with me being D famous. D list, it's like, I can imagine certain people that's on a level to where they presentation is everything and they judge you. Like, it's people that's gonna have bad days and it's okay, you know, it's like everybody's still going through normal things. And I learned not to treat people like what I see them at. I understand that it's a person behind that. Just cause I see a cashier at McDonald's, I don't treat you like that. I understand you're still a personality. I feel like some people just still don't know. You still are a human being. You're not a robot, you know, So I understand people judge people for their jobs. It's like, it's something behind that. Like, Beyonce still has to, you know, go take shits. You know, she still got diarrhea. You know, she still got family that she loves. She still might have like a bad day. So when, you know, problem is up you at the airport, you gotta. You can't let nobody be like, yeah, not pictures right now. I'm kinda. You know, my grandma just died. They were like, who gives a fuck? Like, I need this picture now.

[A]

Oh, I was with. I was. My daughter, she was having a moment. She was crying, and we were having like a parenting moment. We were. I mean, we were standing in public and someone just came up, was like, hey, man, can I get a picture? I was like, I'm. I'm kind of dealing with something. He goes, all right. When you're done. And I was like, I'm not gonna be done for a while. She's crying. He was like, oh, then let's just bang out a selfie real quick before I go.

[C]

And it makes you feel like shit both ways.

[A]

It's crazy, because my daughter was livid. And I was like, I understand. I understand this guy. I get his brain because I've seen famous people and not known how to interact and go like, hey, can I get a picture? Like, I did the thing that I hate that people do to me to Big boy from Outkast, where I got a picture, and then we got on the plane, we were sitting in front of each other and asked for another one. And I was like, I already got. And as I did it, I went, I already got the picture. I hate when people do this to me. Why am I doing this? To prove I was with him in two places. And so I understand that, but it's crazy when you say that to get up and go is. I was to talk about Theo one more time. I asked Theo the other day. I was like, hey, do you travel alone? He travels everywhere by himself. Yeah. He goes everywhere by himself. He has no team. It's him. He gets all the playing by himself. He walks by himself. I was talking to my wife. We were talking about the possibility of infidelity. She wasn't accusing me of anything, but we were joking. And I said, I haven't been alone in seven years. I haven't been alone.

[C]

Somebody's in your business.

[A]

Someone's been next to me for seven years. If not one person. Seven people have been with me for seven years. And that's interesting you say that because it would be nice. I mean, obviously you get what you want because you work for it, and then you want the team and you want to create and you want to make things. But I see what you're saying. Of, like, the old school college days for me, of, like, getting up and just disappearing.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And no one asking where I was and not caring to check in with anyone. Yeah. No one going like, well, I'm worried about you. Where did you go?

[C]

Yeah. So my brother, he was like, yeah. It's like. It's a place where you go in there. It's titties and ass everywhere. You got to pay to get in. You can pick who you want. I can't go in there.

[A]

No, you can't, man.

[C]

But he's like, it sounds fun, though.

[A]

Do you remember the first time you got that? You ruined a strip club for Your friends.

[C]

Yo. And that is because I throw a lot of money.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And every time we go or they. They sing with me, they like, all right, he's here, he's back. Yeah. And it's like, I like, I just want some chicken today.

[A]

Are you talking about Magic City?

[C]

Blue Flame.

[A]

Okay. Because Magic City's got the best wings in the world. Yeah.

[C]

They.

[A]

Yeah, you said chicken. I was like, wait, Blue Flames got good chicken.

[C]

Yeah. But let's, you know, imagine he got it, though. But I was just in Blue Flame because it's like, it's bigger. It's a bigger space.

[A]

Really? Yeah, yeah. I went to a strip club with Brett Ernst to cut. Another comedian.

[C]

When you go to a strip club, do you straight or you keep it close?

[A]

No, they asked me to take my shirt off. All the time. Yeah, all the time. They're like, hey, come on.

[C]

What's the difference between, like, the white girl strip club and the black girl strip club?

[A]

It's a power dynamic. A black girl stripper conducts herself with. With more power than a white stripper. White stripper comes from a place of. Of. And I hope. I'm. I apologize. It's just my perspective, and I just thought about this because we were at Magic City with Pac Man. A white stripper comes from a play, from a punching down place. When you get a lap dance from a white stripper, you almost feel bad for her.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You're like, ugh, what happened to her life?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. You get a lap dance from a black chick. She is in control. She's in power. Yeah. She's directing the narrative.

[C]

Hella jury on.

[A]

Oh, yeah. And she's like, there is. You don't ever. I mean, from. As a white guy. Just as a white guy. Like, if. And I'm just saying, like, ballpark rules. If the rules are you can't touch my ass.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You don't touch a black chick's ass twice. You touch a white chick's ass twice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, if you drive. If she goes, don't do that. You're like, yeah, sure, right. Well, one more time. And then. Yeah, but we would. Don't do that with a black chick. Yeah, but black strippers. The first black strip club I ever went to was Magic City, and I was on ecstasy and I was blown away at how much more fun it was. Yeah. It wasn't sad. It wasn't like. Like, it wasn't like a world.

[C]

It's a different world.

[A]

Yeah, it's. It's. It is. It's a Party. Yeah. And everyone's a part of it. And. Yeah, it's.

[C]

I mean, still dance even if they get money.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And it's just like, like, you know, at the white girls school, they dance like. Like, that's the white girls. They just like, hey, like, you know, you want to dance? And it's like, oh, you know. And the white girl's like, you gonna take this fucking dance? Like, you want a shot? Give me a shot, motherfucker.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Take me through there.

[A]

Open a bottle of champagne. We must spend so much bottles, so much money on champagne.

[C]

Order another and then start ordering shit for you. Yeah, get us six, eight bottles over here. The.

[A]

The fridge isn't open. Have them open it. Magic.

[C]

Open this fridge like you, like. Let me tell you, the first. First time I went to a strip club.

[A]

We should call Pac man and hear his difference between white strippers and black strippers. I bet he's never been with a white stripper, right?

[C]

Oh, yeah. But let me tell you, the first time I went to a strip club, I'm in there and I see all the women I like.

[A]

Black strip club.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

It was all. Everything.

[A]

Everything. Okay.

[C]

I see all the women I like. And then it's one that come. I don't really care for. She come up and she's like, wanna dance? And I said. I was like, oh, I ain't got no money on me. I just got my debit card. She says, atm right there. I'm like, what the fuck? That was my excuse. And I did not know atm, this is my first. So I'm at the atm, I'm getting the money out. She's still right there. And I'm like, I'm going so slow and I'm going. And she's like, yeah. She's like. And she's looking like. I said like, yeah. She's like, you can take out how much ever you want. And I'm like, please get away. And I didn't know. I didn't know, like. And I. That was my first lie. Yeah, that was like. That got exposed and it was like, damn. And she got the money and, you know, it just made me feel like shit.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, and it was just like, you know, I gotta come back in here. But I'm not looking at you.

[A]

It's a weird.

[C]

You gotta say no.

[A]

It's a weird energy to not make eye contact. Contact with people, to be like, oh, don't look at her. Because it. It's almost like, have you. You've been to New York.

[C]

Uhhuh.

[A]

You ever. The first time you walked through Washington Square park and people are trying to sell you weed. And if you don't know. If you're from the south, you don't know that, like, people going, smoke, smoke, smoke, smoke is like. They. I think that I thought they wanted cigarettes. I was like, oh, no, I don't have one. And you just don't start the conversation. But those. That strip club energy is like. It's, like, crazy.

[C]

It reminds me of YouTube when you watching your favorite show and ads keep popping up.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So it's like you can skip what you want or you can watch it. It's like, skip the ad. It's the ad. Here come an ad. That's what, like, our little phrase is. Like, even when I'm with my friends, when I hear come an ad, and somebody come up, like, hey, man. So it's like, let's try to skip over this one.

[A]

If you started a strip club, what food would you serve?

[C]

Well, I would try to. You know what I would serve? I would serve pancakes. Pancakes. And I would serve pancakes with, like, pancakes. Burger pancakes, Chicken. Like the pancakes. Cause, like, you know, cakes. And I call the club cakes.

[A]

That's a business. That's a brilliant business model.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't know why they don't make more pancake tacos. Yeah. Cause it's always just a sweet thing.

[C]

Yeah, definitely. Yeah.

[A]

I remember the first time I ever had chicken and waffles.

[C]

Does that look like pancake tacos?

[A]

Pancake tacos. How'd you make those?

[C]

I can't wait to get all this mucus out of me.

[A]

Get an IV today. Get an iv.

[C]

I'm scared. You want to know who got me my first iv?

[A]

Who?

[C]

I want to like. You got to look him up. Listen to him. He's a dope person, and he got like. People look at him as image, but NBA Young Boy.

[A]

I wrote his name down. I don't know anything about him.

[C]

Yeah, I don't know.

[A]

I know his name, but I don't know anything about him. Him or NBA Young Thug. Is there another guy named Young Thug? What's and what? Tell me about him. I feel like that's the thing when you get older. All of a sudden, someone shows up and they're super hot, and, like, everyone's talking about them, and you're like, well, I don't know who that is. That's Young Thug. Go to NBA Young Boy.

[C]

Yeah. And when I tell you, he's so chill and cool, like, yeah, like, where's he from Louisiana? Okay. And he's like, right now he's on tour. Look at his tour right now. It's like he's. They calling him, like, the Michael Jackson.

[A]

Yeah, I saw. That's. That's how I saw him. His tour is crazy right now.

[C]

It's going, like, where. It's stadiums and what are they doing.

[A]

At his tour that they were all everyone's talking about. Oh, it's like his tour is where they go. The. The cheap seats come down to the expensive seats.

[C]

Yeah, they taken over, and they're taking.

[A]

Over, and it's just videos of people going, like, I. This person paid $9,000 for tickets. I paid 15.

[C]

What are you doing? We got to go to one together.

[A]

I'll do it. I'll do it. We'll get. We'll pay for expensive seats and then watch everyone flood us. Yeah, go, go. Wait, go back.

[C]

You got one in Atlanta coming up.

[A]

When's our. Atlanta's gonna be sick.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

State Farm Arena. Yeah. October 18th. Am I on the road?

[C]

Are you on the road?

[A]

On a Wednesday, I might not be. Am I on the road? October 18th? Oh, fuck, that's a Saturday. What does it say? Wednesday. They all say Wednesday.

[C]

He got two shows there, right? Or only one?

[A]

Yeah, on the 15th. October 15th. Yeah.

[C]

And then you got the 18th and then the 18th, too.

[A]

Who opens for him?

[C]

He got. It's different people.

[A]

Yeah. So when you. If you want to go to an. If you want to go to his show, can you text him and be like, yo, can you get me tickets? Yeah, yeah, I'll get you backstage. Really? And then do you get intimidated in the backstage? Because I'm sure there's a ton of people. I get when you. When you go backstage in Atlanta to an NBA youngboy show, it's gotta be the who's who. Everyone's gotta be there.

[C]

The thing is that I tell people, when you're around people that got big names and you excited, it's always be you. I feel like we like in you. You can speak for experience. You being next to where this is naturally, like Donnell, when you meet him, it's just him. Like, I feel like when you be you, people can accept who you are. And also, don't tell yourself, don't be weird. Be weird. Be you. Because if you stop yourself from being yourself, it can be weird. Like, okay, you know, so that's what I said. It determines your friendship, you know?

[A]

Yeah. I always tell people, if you come backstage at one of my shows, have a blast I want you to have a blast. Yeah.

[C]

What about how you got to meet? I think y' all do good together backstage. Like, Post Malone. Hey, y' all got to, like, kick it.

[A]

Yeah. I ran into him one time. I mean this out of respect. I don't mean this shitty. But, like, he has so much going on on his face. Yeah. That I did not recognize him.

[C]

Yeah. He got. When he first started off, it started getting a lot of tattoos.

[A]

It was. It was like we were in a group. And also he was in me and I once again, being careful with what I say. He was in MySpace. He was at the. Backstage at the Comedy Store. So he was in MySpace. So I saw a guy with, like, gold teeth, all the tats, the big beard, smoking a cigarette, and we almost bumped into each other. And he was like, hey, man, huge fan. I was like. And as soon as he said that, I went, oh, thanks. Kind of directed eye contact and walked away. And someone was like, yo, Post Malone knows who you are. And I was like, what? Like, post Malone. I had to go back and go, I didn't recognize you.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And he was like, really? But he has so much going on that, like, it's a lot. And so if you're image change, if you're getting recognized. Yeah. You can get caught off guard. He was very sweet. I took a picture with him.

[C]

Yeah, that's like me. I like, I have my braids, my afro. So, like, like, you. You lost weight. You had it. So sometimes people do change their image a lot.

[A]

Do you? Do you like, did you like, when he was doing hip hop? Did you like Post Malone then?

[C]

Yeah, I like when people be comfortable with they self and they living they truth. Like, and I'm learning. I don't care to point fingers. I don't care about all this and that. Because, like, I tell people, don't match ugly with ugly. Even if you feel like they doing, like, it's okay. Like, let them figure it out. Let them go through it.

[A]

So don't match ugly with ugly.

[C]

I learned, like, not to get people. You got me fucked up. I feel like people pass those out so much. Like, when are you gonna really use you got me fucked up? And prime example, somebody can go to McDonald's, get they order wrong. You got me fucked up. Somebody can cut them off on the road. You got me fucked up. It's like, why do you care so much that somebody can get in your brain and say, you got me fucked up? Like, how many you gonna pass out?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So again, how many? Yeah. Like, it's like, how many? I don't got that many. You got me fucked up. I got, like, two of them a month. And when I use it, I really use it. Good.

[A]

Should be from my wife, kids. My kids.

[C]

That's it. That's what I'm saying. But other than that, you, like, I understand that this is normal. It's okay. Like, I don't have to live in this moment forever.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And once you ask yourself, do I gotta live in this moment forever? It's all right. Like, if somebody cut you off, I get it, B. I'm not about to follow you home. I don't have to live in that moment forever.

[A]

Yeah. The strongest thing is. The most powerful thing is not giving a fuck.

[C]

Yes. That's what I'm saying.

[A]

If you deal with someone young in the service industry and they don't give a fuck, and you give a fuck and they don't, there's nothing more powerful. When I worked, I used to work at Barnes and Noble. I remember one time this lady asked for a magazine. You had to take the escalator up to get the mag to get to the magazines. And usually if I took the escalator up, I was going to get where the coffee was. Yeah. So she got behind me and I took up the escalator, and I walked past the magazines, and I forgot she was with me. And I got in line to get coffee, and she was standing next to me. She was like, what are we doing? And I went, oh, shit. I forgot you were here. And she was like, what? I was like, yeah, I'm sorry. I go, I guess my head's just not into this. I go, they're over there. And she was like, no, you need to take me over there. I was like, oh, I'm getting a coffee. She was like, no, you were helping me first. I was like, oh, yeah. I don't. I'm going to get a coffee. Like, I didn't give a fuck if I got fired. I didn't care.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

She was so livid. And I did not care. Yeah. And me not caring was so much more powerful.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Than anything she could have said to my. My manager, Dwayne.

[C]

Yeah. She. Dwyane. He's black.

[A]

Yeah, he was. Yeah. Yeah. And he was. He asked me if I wanted to be a manager. And I was like, no.

[C]

Right.

[A]

And he was like, I'm a manager. And I was like, exactly. And he was like. He's like, it's benefits. He's like, you went to college. You're An English major. And I was like, I don't think that Barnes and Mo doesn't exist anymore. So I thought I made the right call now.

[C]

That was good. That's like that you like. And that's what I said. And guess what? She went and she told a lot of people that story. And you went on about your life. And she probably talking about that story to this day. Yeah, like, oh, I remember him. He's that fucker that walk past.

[A]

What if they made a pill called I don't give a fuck how good. I guess that's called weed.

[C]

No, that's cocaine.

[A]

Cocaine? Yeah, Cocaine. Yeah, that's right.

[C]

Yeah. I never seen a crackhead that gives a fuck about shit. What they dress, what they do, how they steal. That's what that is.

[A]

I don't give a fuck.

[C]

Yeah, they don't give a fuck. I'm in my own world.

[A]

That's ultimately what all drugs are, is a dose. I don't give a fuck.

[C]

Yeah, especially drinking when you drunk.

[A]

I don't give a fuck.

[C]

You go to jail. You go to jail. You wake up like, what the fuck happened? That's the only thing where you come down from the. I don't give a fuck. Like you like, fuck it, I need another one.

[A]

Ooh, I give a fuck. Next morning.

[C]

Like, drunk people are so cool like that. Just stay at home. Like the one like, I had a drunk uncle. He just stayed at home and he got drunk and he just got mad at. When he ran out of beer and it was just dope. His name was Uncle Rob. And it was just amazing and relaxing to know that you can drink your own shit and sit on this couch and watch football and watch and just stay out of the way.

[A]

There's no better feeling. I know the feeling Uncle Rob had. There's no better feeling than having a plethora of beer in your fridge and knowing all you gotta do is get up and get another one.

[C]

And then that sound reflection, that crack it open sound. The.

[A]

The this sound of this sound when you're. When you got nothing to do and you. And it's like the best is when it's on a Sunday and you got a flight on Monday and you're going, I'm gonna pack my bag, I'm gonna watch some YouTube and then you got a six pack with club and it's in the fridge and you got four left. This sound.

[C]

Yeah, that's it. And every time I heard it, I said, he about get drunk. Isn't that why when they wake up In Doraine, it was that. You know, I just thought about this because my mind is so random. They should get you. It's a new season of King of the Hill. You should go get you a character on there.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

You need an animation character on King of the Hill that will help them. It's like. It would be big.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. If you could do. If you could reboot one franchise and make like one animated franchise, pull up animated franchises that we could. That you could reboot, what would you. Which one would you reboot?

[C]

Well, a lot of people, I'm a probably get hateful saying this, but they said the Boondocks. I never watched the Boondocks.

[A]

I never watched the Boondocks. I knew a couple of guys that wrote on it.

[C]

Yeah. The boondock.

[A]

Animated franchises. Universal. Type in Universal. Universal's got the kind of. The best ones and the old school ones. Click. That make it bigger. I know none of them.

[C]

Child's Play. That's Chucky.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

He animation. Chucky is considered animation.

[A]

I don't think so. Woody Woodpecker would be a good one.

[C]

I love the Hawk. Ted Hulk.

[A]

I don't know any of this.

[C]

You don't know Ted?

[A]

Who?

[C]

Ted? You mean look up Ted?

[A]

Wait, the teddy bear? Yeah. Oh, yeah, of course.

[C]

Let me ask you this. That's so funny. Can you go to Lion King, Toy Story if you had to get rid of one? Which one?

[A]

Lion King.

[C]

I said the same thing. I asked the world that, and I felt like Toy Story. I learned a lot.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It was a group of friends, toys that stayed together. Andy was loyal to them.

[A]

There's a million types of Lion King stories out there. Yeah. Like Bambi's a Lion King story. The Jungle Book's a Lion King story.

[C]

But who would you say is the main character on Toy Story? Woody or Buzz Lightyear?

[A]

It's Woody. It's.

[C]

People will say buzz Lightyear, who got paid more?

[A]

As I'll tell you, I guarantee you, Tom Hanks got paid more than Tim Allen. Let's see, who got paid more? And Woody. Tom Allen.

[C]

But they would say Buzz Lightyear is the main character. No, because Buzz Lightyear got his own movie, though. Woody don't.

[A]

They got paid $50,000.

[C]

See?

[A]

Are you shitting me? They got paid 50 fucking thousand dollars. That's the crazy thing. When.

[C]

Let me ask a question. I'm gonna ask. See, look, I bet. Let me.

[A]

Hi.

[C]

Who's the main character in Toy Story? Buzz Lightyear or Woody? Buzz Lightyear. All right, I'll call you right back. People are saying, buzz Lightyear. I said, what?

[A]

See, that's a white chick.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Who. Type in who's. Look who's right there. It's Woody.

[C]

Yeah, but that's like, look who's up front.

[A]

It's Woody.

[C]

See, everybody?

[A]

Buzz Lightyear. Smaller.

[C]

Let's do Tristan. Tristan's black.

[A]

Okay. Type in who's the main character in.

[C]

It's funny. This is where this conversation led into, like, nothing. But it's so dope. Hey, Tristan.

[A]

Hey.

[C]

Told you.

[B]

Hey.

[A]

Hey.

[C]

Who. The main character. Yeah, this. Yeah, this. This trick. Look, what's up, brother?

[A]

How you doing?

[C]

Who. Who is the make. Who's the main character? Toy Story or Buzz Lightyear? What? Woody. Ah, Woody and Toy Story. Woody or Buzz Lightyear? Neither. They both are. See, everybody got their own idea of what everybody's saying.

[A]

Who's the lead character in Star Wars? Who's the lead character in Star Wars? Han Solo or Luke Skywalker?

[C]

It's Luke Skywalker. It's Luke.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I'm the good supporter. But it's Luke.

[A]

It is. Okay.

[C]

It's Luke's story.

[A]

Yeah, it is Luke's story. It's Luke's story. You're right.

[C]

I don't say bye no more.

[A]

Say goodbye.

[C]

Yeah, it's rude. They tell somebody bye. Like, that's. Like, that's forever. Like, I wanted to live forever.

[A]

I like that.

[C]

Let's just hang up.

[A]

I like that a lot. All right, real quick, before we wrap up, I gotta get you out of here. What I need. I need black phrases.

[C]

If I hear wrap up, I'm thinking.

[A]

Like, no, no, I'm not saying bye. I'm not saying bye. Oh, what I need. You taught me type one year ago.

[C]

Take me through there.

[A]

Take. You're making these up.

[C]

No, I'm. Watch. I'm trying to tell you. Look, we call it. Watch this. He's going to finish it. Hold on. We gonna do this. Finish it. Finish it. Take me through there. Take me through there all the way in it. No. Okay, I'm sorry. That's a phrase that we got in it. Like, that's, take me through there. Take me through there. Like, take me through there. That's like, take me through. Like, what you want to talk? Like, if you telling me a story, say, look, let me tell you what the fuck. Like, take me through there.

[A]

Like, I go, man, I went on a date last night. You go, take me through there.

[C]

Yeah, take me through there. Take me through there. You gotta say it like that, though.

[A]

Through there. Yeah.

[C]

You got say, take Me through there. So it's like the story. Like the. It's the story. Take me through there. See, I told. Look, it's. It's a thing. It's a song.

[A]

Hey, let me. Let me. Let me try it with my daughter, okay? See if she knows it yet. All right. Let's see. All right, you ready? I'm. Tell me if I use it right. We'll just call. Hi. Sorry. I didn't answer. God damn it.

[C]

She said sorry.

[A]

How old is your daughter?

[C]

My daughter. My oldest one is 12.

[A]

Yeah. How's your young, your youngest one?

[C]

I got three kids, and then I.

[A]

Met the youngest a year ago.

[C]

So.

[A]

Years old.

[C]

I got different races of kids. I got the Mexican, the black one, and I got the white and black one. I'm going for Asian next.

[A]

You're going for Asian? Yeah. Yo, Sandra. Well. Oh, no, I'm not just saying.

[C]

What. Who.

[A]

Sandra, what would be a good black Asian name for someone? Dis.

[C]

This is different. This is different. Yeah, yeah, this, yeah, Dis. Like D, I, S. D, I, S.

[A]

S, S. I want you to meet Dis.

[C]

Yeah, Dis.

[A]

Oh, what? Who's that?

[C]

Like, Dis. Like. What do you mean, Dis? But you have to say. You got to say the D loud. Dis.

[A]

Dis.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Sandra, what's a good. Like, give me a good black Asian name.

[C]

Dis is good.

[A]

Like. Yeah. Blasian name.

[C]

Yeah. Have you read a Harry Potter book before?

[A]

No. No, not at all.

[C]

My brother, he said he can read one in a day. I'm like, it's impossible.

[A]

It's impossible. I go, iko in that. In that? Yeah.

[C]

That's a good one.

[A]

Are you done having kids? You have one more.

[C]

I want to adopt, though. I want to adopt for real.

[A]

I'm gonna do. I got a whole bit on foster kids.

[C]

Oh, you, like, bet?

[A]

What? No, I'm gonna try tonight.

[C]

Like you say, bit like putting in a bit.

[A]

I gotta do two spots tonight.

[C]

Can you tell me something in life. What is that thing? I always seen it on movies when people used to be like going from 50. Like, it was a crowd of people and they used to bit on, like, how much something go for. What was that?

[A]

Sounds like slavery.

[C]

Oh, no.

[A]

I'm talking about.

[C]

No, it was like a movie. They had them in movies. Remember in white chicks when he was like. When he was like, betting scene. He was like. He was like going for 50 when white chick said, can you go to an auction? No. Go to white chicks bidding.

[A]

I love that your references White chicks bidding, bidding. Bidding. Bidding. It's an auction.

[C]

What does that mean? What was that for? I never understood that.

[A]

I'm bidding.

[C]

And they had girl. Like, it was always on TV show where you can bid girls and stuff.

[A]

This is this. Back in the day, you'd be able to take one of them out on a date. They do a bid. They still do it in some places. But you sororities would say that this is not done anymore. But in like the 80s, it's a little bit of a trope in this. But you could take the hottest girl out that you'd bid to take her on a date. So, like, someone would.

[C]

And does she get the money?

[A]

No, no, no. The money goes to charity. Oh, so they do it. They do it with celebrities now. Like An Evening with Bert Kreischer. And I think I did one, actually. I did one and I went to dinner with a family. But they got to bid on whether or not they. And so you raise like $10,000. And the idea is they want to meet you, they want to spend quality time with you, and then they bid. The money goes to charity. I've done it before. I've done it to. I love. I love auctions. I love.

[C]

Yeah, that's why I said. I knew it. I knew you would know.

[A]

And by the way, just to be clear, that is exactly how slavery went also.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah. Isn't that crazy?

[C]

It's. Yeah, I've seen it like in the day Chappelle skits and shit.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, it's fucking insane. Yeah, but. But yeah, those auctions, it's an old school thing. They used to have kissing booths.

[C]

Yeah. I never understood it. And it been on my mind every time I see it.

[A]

No, no, think about that, though. They had kissing booths. Yeah, think about that.

[C]

I remember that growing up.

[A]

And then where you go. And you go line up, and everyone would kiss the chick. So there'd be a girl and she'd kiss everyone.

[C]

Yeah, I remember. Like, these are all. I just remember seeing these in movies.

[A]

Like. Yeah. Isn't that crazy? A kissing booth.

[C]

And another thing before we go to. I want. Do you know where cheers came from?

[A]

No.

[C]

All right, so look, before I tell you, I want y' all to look it up. Cheers came from two leaders. They was on a boat, you know, back then, and they had beer in the glass. And cheers came from. They wanted to trust each other not to poison me. So my liquor getting yours and mine getting yours. That's where cheers came from.

[A]

For real.

[C]

Look it up. I can't read.

[A]

It doesn't say that at all.

[C]

I think she on the wrong one.

[A]

No, it says cheers.

[C]

No, no, it's. Trust me.

[A]

Cheers began as a French word meaning face that evolved being joy.

[C]

Cheers with beer. Cheers. Because, like. Yeah, see, like, cheers. Like, they take.

[A]

Yeah. Beer Origin still says the same thing. Wait, how about this? How about this? Clinking glasses. Clinking glasses. That's the right one. Yep. Yep. That's what you meant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The tapping of the glass.

[C]

Yeah. And there's cheers.

[A]

That's crazy. I love little like that. Like, you know those guys that are on Instagram where they're like, in 1952, and then they tell this story and then they go. And that's how we got. Let the cat out of the bag. Yeah. Yeah. I love making those up. Yeah. Well, I'll see if I see. Give me something and I'll tell you how it happened.

[C]

Okay. Okay. Oh, that. What is the saying out there? I know I got a good saying on there. Oh, what did that? If your friend jump off a bridge, would you jump off a bridge too? Why was that a big saying?

[A]

That's so crazy. It's because when they built the San Francisco Bridge, the guy that built the bridge, he had a twin brother.

[C]

Take me through there.

[A]

I can't wait to use that. I can't wait to use that. The guy that built the San Francisco Bridge, his name was Ricky Armand. He had a brother named Dickie Armand. They built. They each started on one side of the. On the. Of the river, of the. The straight. So one started here, one started here, and they started building until they met in the middle. And when they got in the middle, Ricky said, whoever gets there first jumps off. Whoever gets there first jumps off. And it turns out when they got to the middle, they met. They couldn't tell who got there first, so they both jumped off. And we lost both guys that built San Francisco Bridge. And that's how we got the phrase, if your friend jumps off a bridge, would you jump too? Because it ruins everything. And now no one builds bridges anymore.

[C]

Right. And we needed them too. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Right. And you just made that up.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know how to lie. So good to be in a relationship. That's scary.

[A]

I'm not good at lying like that. Watch this. Asked me where I. I'm gonna ask. Almost get Leanne up here. So one time, Leanne found a pair of jeans in my bag, a pair of women's jeans in my bag, and she goes, whose are these? And I was like, I don't Know now, I wasn't lying. But I start. I get so uncomfortable that I start laughing and it looks like I'm lying, right? And I started going, I don't know.

[C]

Right? Like. Or it could be, you don't know. Cause you don't know which chick it was.

[A]

I don't know. I really honestly didn't know how they got in there. And I was like, I don't know. And then she started going, stop laughing. I go, no, I really don't know. So when I. And I am so bad that I start giggling and laughing. And then it turns out they were her friend Julie's jeans. Do you remember that story? Her friend Julie. Leanne put them on, wore them. And then her friend Julie goes, whose jeans are those Are my jeans. Leanne goes, these are the ones in Bert's bag. And Julie the whole time was like, fuck him, he's a liar. He's a liar. Divorce him, take his money.

[C]

And I was like, so did she set you up? She's here.

[A]

No, she was a friend of ours.

[C]

Is she still around?

[A]

Yeah, I think so. She lives in Missouri? Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[C]

I'm from Kansas City. You gotta watch out for people out there.

[A]

She's from, like, old school Missouri too.

[C]

Yeah, me too.

[A]

Really? Yeah. I thought you're from Kansas City.

[C]

Yeah, Kansas City, Missouri.

[A]

Yeah. Are you from outside Kansas City?

[C]

Like, yeah. So you got Kansas City, then you got Kansas.

[A]

So wait, are you from Kansas?

[C]

No, Kansas City.

[A]

Cause that's the. That's the.

[C]

Don't get that.

[A]

I learned that when I was 13 years old.

[C]

Yeah. Don't fuck that. That'd make.

[A]

Never fuck that up. Yeah. Why is it different?

[C]

I don't know. I just found out that Louisiana and Baton Rouge are two different things. Don't fuck that up. I thought that was.

[A]

I'm performing in Baton Rouge. Is that bad?

[C]

Just don't say, was that Louisiana? Like, make some noise Louisiana and say Baton Rouge.

[A]

For real? Yeah. Why?

[C]

Because it's a respect thing. And it's like, this is where we come from.

[A]

Just from.

[C]

Yep. You need game on this show.

[A]

I got. I'm obsessed with him. I. I did. I did a deep dive on. I mean, I don't know if this is real, but they said there was this.

[C]

So one thing. Is that the end we can't do on the podcast? Let's talk about what you heard. And did you hear the first sentence that you said? You listen to what the fuck you was about to say. Anybody could be next. Just stop me argue. I couldn't hold that one back. Yeah. So your favorite cereal is what I never understood Captain Crunch. Like, and why tricks are for kids. It's like, why they never let him eat the cereal. I never, like. A lot of cereal characters was very.

[A]

Weird when you look back at it.

[C]

Like, Silly Rabbit, Trixa for kids. Like, is it his cereal brand or what.

[A]

You guys got?

[C]

And then, like, Frosting Flakes. Like, Frosting Flakes was weird. They have no more cereal.

[A]

Cut your face, you go, look what you just said.

[C]

I'm not a street guy, but I know the street rules. I'm Shadow.

[A]

I'm not a street guy, but I know the street rules. Have you hung out with Chappelle?

[C]

I never got to. I got to see him. He like. He like this guy and he just say that, and it's like, what? Tell me more. And he goes on about his day, but I think he does that to everybody. He know how to, like, make you feel good.

[A]

He does, man. Yeah.

[C]

He know how to make you feel good.

[A]

Katt does, too, I think.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I think they're both like this.

[C]

I think Katt will probably be nonchalant. If he ain't got nothing to say, he not gonna make. He like, okay, like, I ain't got nothing to say I ain't gonna say. But Dave Chappelle will go out of his way at all. Like he could, but. Oh, yeah, you remember. You seen my video? Yeah, See, I love it. Keep going like that. Go about, they never seen your shit. But that's like, you know, this is the good news.

[A]

What about Kevin?

[C]

Kevin Hart is somebody that got a big lingo and he knows how to talk, and he will lose you in the conversation. Kevin Hart got so many words. Let me tell you something. And he got so many different versions of him. And it's so, like, he's so intelligent. I see why he is where he at. And then it's like, what's that called? If he could be animal? The armadillo, where he can just blend in.

[A]

What is that as a chameleon?

[C]

Yeah, same thing.

[A]

No, not at all.

[C]

Yeah, it is.

[A]

Same, same. You're right. Yeah. Armadillo. Armadillos and chameleons are like. They're like alligators and crocodiles. The same. Same. So wait, can you explain? Can you explain? I don't mean this shitty, but like, the Ishow speed and. And the Kai Sonat. Do they stream? Do they.

[C]

Let me.

[A]

Are they streaming all the time?

[C]

I'll tell you the backstory. Casanet is somebody that started streaming From New York. And when he blew up a rat, you could do rap, castanet rap. He was in New York and a rat ran across his room and that blew him up. And he kept going and he kept. He felt embarrassed because he was in New York and he wanted to stream. Look, you see it? And that was him. That was his room. You see how.

[A]

Oh my God.

[C]

And when that blew up, everybody in the chat was like, oh my God. Like, and he felt embarrassed.

[A]

Oh my God. Oh my God.

[C]

And that moment made him like from what I know it made him feel bad, but he kept going. Cause he's like, I didn't want. I wanted to stream, but the environment I am. It was bad. I didn't want to like. And his family was loud. He said his brother and sister. So he kept going. And that moment, him going through that pain made everybody watch us glow up. So that moment kept going. ISO Speed is somebody that was streaming that was blowing up shit in his house.

[A]

Blowing up shit like fireworks.

[C]

Everything just blowing shit up.

[A]

Ishowspeed is really fast, right?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And it all started gaming, right?

[C]

No.

[A]

Oh really?

[C]

They do it like dude, ISO Speed biggest moment. Think he put his. And it just like kept.

[A]

Uh. Oh. Oh.

[C]

But he just go in that room. All this ain't. Yeah, he was in like a tent behind there and he just. Oh, you could just put house on fire. But I think his house got on fire when he did the fireworks.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Like, yeah, he just put it on fire. Like.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

He just did like this in his room.

[A]

And he also is very fast, right?

[C]

Yeah. Imagine hearing your, your kid in there.

[A]

Doing that and then walking in and seeing this.

[C]

Yeah, he.

[A]

Oh, oh. Can you imagine watching this live?

[C]

Yeah, that's what they. Look at the comments. You see the comments.

[A]

Holy shit. Oh. Oh. That had to catch his room on fire. Where did it go? Where did it go? Oh my God, Mom.

[C]

Oh my God.

[A]

Those are all fireworks.

[C]

Yeah, he's going to do it. Light them all up. He lit like where stuff start getting on fire.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And that was like moments. So he was just.

[A]

Oh, that's the fucking fire department.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

So hold on, hold on. Can I ask the dumbest question? Like if I. If me and you had done this, live streamed it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And then I had planned to like bring in a cobra, then that would go viral.

[C]

It's not necessary, like. Cause certain things I brought in a.

[A]

Bunch of poisonous snakes.

[C]

Yeah. It when stuff like that. You could see the organic seed where I just want to do what I want to do. And then you can see people that want to force it. That's like you, you took your shirt off. Cause it feel good to you. You know what I mean? Comedians are probably trying to do what you do. And it's like I seen him make it. But you just, you was just. And that's what we call the original. So I feel like the real understand and it's the energy in the air. The original.

[A]

Oh, the original. Okay.

[C]

It just feel original.

[A]

That is. That felt like I got excited.

[C]

He just wanted to see it.

[A]

Yeah. All right, so this is him running and Tom Brady can't believe how he. So he really is fast, right?

[C]

Yeah. Uh huh.

[A]

Wow. And so now do they walk around? Cause I forget who came.

[C]

He's on tour.

[A]

But do they walk around with like a backpack and a camera?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Straight batteries. And it streams live wherever they are.

[C]

Kyle did a 30 day straight live and invited guests over for 30 and you could see him does it. It was 30 days and he then did it three times already. He does it like in October, I believe or last month. Wow. When it's the marathon.

[A]

Cause they do the sleepovers at Kevin Hart's house. Yeah.

[C]

But overall it's just respect to them because they created something and it's letting kids know that you can do this behind the screen. Remember back then it used to be wrong to be a geek on a computer. Remember when I grew up it was like knowing computer stuff, you were just like a geek glasses. So I love what they doing because it get people to like if you don't want to get a 9 to 5, you can't be entertained behind a computer screen.

[A]

Wow, that's really crazy.

[C]

And it's opening the door for people to, you know, not be on the streets and you know, trying to get a job and you can actually get behind. So consonant and speed has made the younger generation get more into less through the Internet.

[A]

And they're not getting fucking wasted and smoking weed. They're just going out and doing like I watch, I watch. It's so funny how they showed up in like I. I say this about Nicki Minaj. I remember when Nicki or no Cardi B. When Cardi B came out like, look.

[C]

Up the longest girl streaming. She's still streaming right now. I think she's been streaming for like three years.

[A]

What?

[C]

Longest stream ever. I think it's still going on Twitch or something. She's still streaming right now. I think you can click on it, you can look it up. Twitch.

[A]

And so she sleeps and stuff. Right.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. She just like her live and you watch her sleep. Yeah, yeah, they will. Yeah, right here. I think she's still alive right now. Yeah, she's still alive right now. I don't know where she at right now.

[A]

Holy shit.

[C]

She been how long they say she been on stream?

[A]

It's like four years, so I don't.

[C]

Know where it's at. She probably stepped out, probably took a shower. But yeah, she been streaming.

[A]

So then is that something?

[C]

And that's the comments over there. How many people watching her right now? You can scoot over. I mean, the red. The red bodies right there. The number. I can't see it. Yeah, it's 189 people.

[A]

So it's different than Instagram Live.

[C]

Yeah, it's different.

[A]

And so. And it's on Twitch.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So then you get a Twitch account. And then I saw the dude who just came over and was like, this is who? Oh, yeah, Nate Jackson. Yeah. Came over and he had a backpack. Yeah. And a fucking thing. And then I saw someone doing it and it was crazy. They had a camera and a phone here and they're following the guy around.

[C]

I was like, streaming, watching it live. He started streaming. Nate got so much money.

[A]

Does he?

[B]

Yes. Really?

[C]

He's be gifting people like, like $5,000 on it. Because you can give people like Kaiserna. He just gift is just like, he's Santa Claus.

[A]

So Kaiser, not you. Go on.

[C]

And you might get people paying him. Yeah, like. But it's entertainment.

[A]

A brand is paying.

[C]

No, no, no. Kids are giving him money, subbing out. It's subs, but it's entertainment for you to show us your life. Just imagine if we could just watch your life all day.

[A]

It'd be boring as fuck.

[C]

It's no different from Netflix. You know what I'm saying? How we pay that monthly and we get to watch. So the fact that you're entertaining.

[A]

So if I was like. So if I was like, yo, I'm going. Okay. So theoretically, if I was like, I'm gonna go streaming. And who's that part?

[C]

Who's the first person? Look at that. 57. He got 57,000 people watching him off to the side. I don't know who that is. But he's live right now and he's just watching. He's watching. Playing soccer. He got 57,000 people watching him. You know how many people that is for a show? How long have he been live? Four hours.

[A]

So can. Can I ask?

[C]

He didn't probably made like $10,000.

[A]

Can I ask a really, like, remedial boomer question, but, like, why would someone like, are they. What is he funny?

[C]

It ain't all about that. Just imagine it's no different from YouTube when you put your interviews out, but they get.

[A]

Your interviews are funny.

[C]

I'm saying, you. It ain't. Everybody got their own definition of what they like. Because I ain't gonna lie. If I could see Dave Chappelle live on stream, I'll watch his stream. Because I'm like, what the he does outside of this?

[A]

Yeah, I probably would like if they.

[C]

Just imagine your favorite place.

[A]

If Chappelle would stream live out of his barn that he.

[C]

Yes, you will watch it.

[A]

You would watch Erykah Badu go up and play music?

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Oh, yeah. She probably would never do that because it would ruin. It would ruin his. The thing that makes him Dave.

[C]

Yeah, some people feel like that, too. Yeah.

[A]

God dang.

[C]

Just imagine if fans could watch Beyonce live for a week. Imagine if you tell us where.

[A]

Just imagine if you got a peek into Beyonce's life, where she was. She'd wake up and they're like, listen, we have. We need to look at jewelry today.

[C]

For the fucking Golden Globes. She's pulling in, like, a million people just watching. That's all. Like, you know, and that's why you gotta appreciate everybody that's doing something. You know what I'm saying?

[A]

Cause we, like, right now, my buddy's in Saudi Arabia Arabia performing for a bunch of princes. And the guys that started 911 and how cool. And he was with a lion the other day. They drugged the lion, as PETA would be through the roof about it. But the friend of mine, I won't mention his name. I don't want to get him in trouble. But he. But if he was streaming live, hanging out with friends. Oh, fuck. Yeah. And then so. And then Kai's not. And I show Speeder so big that people go, I want to be on his live stream.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. So like, yo, can you come?

[C]

Yeah. Moment. Yeah, it's called. They got a thing called clip forming. And clip forming is where, like, right now, I would say some crazy shit. And I know somebody from this interview is going to take that moment and make it look bigger than that. I was like. I'm like, what's your problem with me? You got an attitude.

[A]

Yeah. And then they're like, they gonna take.

[C]

That moment and be like, marco crashes out on you. And they gonna see on TikTok, and they're not gonna watch the full interview. They're like, oh, yeah. I always thought he was weird. So they just gonna start commenting instead of watching the full interview.

[A]

Oh, that's the. Oh, yeah, I've had a.

[C]

So people do stuff when they walk up on speed and they be like, man, like, come on, man, you wanna fuck my sister or what? Cause she been DMing you and they gonna clip that moment. Stranger walks up on speed and say you wanna fuck his sister and that moment is clipped.

[A]

Whoa.

[C]

It's like clip forming. So you gotta watch out for that.

[A]

So then you also gotta just trust that the guy you're watching, look at where is he there in Spain?

[C]

I don't know. He's everywhere. Like, speed is really.

[A]

Have you met. I show speed.

[C]

I met him, but I feel like it's one of the ones where you just gotta respect, like, I understand how your life is. I'm just thankful to say, hey, what about Kai? Y' all got to meet him. Yeah, I did. Streaming University. Yeah. Kai's a good guy.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah.

[C]

I mean, I feel like me, everybody's just good in their own way, so. Yeah, but he's great. I love that he's sharing his power and a lot like from you, Kevin Hart, when you can share your platform and be able to create like, even with the YouTube.

[A]

Who's the white streamers?

[C]

Aiden Ross.

[A]

Aiden Ross?

[C]

Yeah, Aiden Ross.

[A]

Oh, Aiden Ross was on Breakfast Club.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. No, no, that was the other guy on Breakfast Club. I forgot his name.

[A]

They were shitting on Adin Ross and he backed up.

[C]

Aiden Ross, Yeah, yeah, no, Aiden Ross was talking. It was another guy on there that they.

[A]

God damn it.

[C]

I forgot his name.

[A]

I've seen him on a bunch of clips.

[C]

You could do Breakfast Club. Aiden Ross. Breakfast Club? Yeah, him right there with the glasses. Him.

[A]

Yeah, that guy. I know that guy.

[C]

Yeah, it was like an incident that happened on there.

[A]

Neon, Neon, Neon. I knew it. I knew it as soon as you said it. Yeah. And so neon's a streamer.

[C]

Neon started off. I remember Neon, you see with the green screen. I remember that neon.

[A]

Whoa.

[C]

And he just been going and going and look how big he is now. It's just like, you never know when your moment is. It's like it's no different from basketball. You just got to keep going and putting in the work. Your life could change.

[A]

That's so crazy.

[C]

And like, I'm like, I wonder, could.

[A]

My wife become a streamer?

[C]

How old is she?

[A]

54. Oh, yeah. Oh, like if we streamed her, you saw her life and she went and got Like a full body CAT scan and all the fun things that menopause women do. Yeah. Like, she woke up early and talking to the animals.

[C]

Yeah, that's me. You know, everybody got a fan base.

[A]

So the people watch. So, wait, how old are the people watching? By the way, I love that I'm interviewing you. If I was dreaming, going like, wait, how old are the people watching?

[C]

Oh, you just never know because so many people. Are you bringing so many people to this new app? That's like, you, like, you can bring your older crowd of people, like, you know, from 78, they'd be like, that was kind of rude.

[A]

My dad, my. My. My demo. I looked at my crowd the other day and I was. I actually wondered. I don't think they use the Internet. Yeah. Like, I don't think they're on TikTok. I really don't think they're on TikTok. I think they use Facebook a lot more than Instagram. And I think they don't care about Twitter. X. I think X is dead. So I started looking at my fan base and I was like. And then I was talking to someone, I was at the airport and I'm talking to this guy about some shit going on in comedy, and he was like. And it was like the hottest. It was like it was all over. It's all over Instagram, it's all over Twitter or X, whatever. And I was like, yeah, you see that? And he goes, no, I don't. Look at that man. Yeah. He's like, I'm. I. I put roofs on.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

He's like, you know, I don't have time to be on my phone looking at. And if I do, I'm looking at, like, boats. I want a boat.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And you're like, wow, that's crazy. The thing, the business we're in is so about us and personalities and stuff. The average person. The average person doesn't give a fuck. They wanna tap out and watch. I show speed, do a backflip off a high dive.

[C]

You get to see it live. And the thing about seeing something live, you don't get to see the edits, you just get to see it live. Like, oh, wow. Just imagine, like, you know, in streams, it's starting to affect some brands. And, like, that's why Netflix, they stream more. Like, when some do it, it's big. Like, oh, let's stream it. Cause you gonna pull in instantly.

[A]

Oh, like the Tom Brady Roast.

[C]

Yeah. Like, yeah, you get to see it live. And it brings in, like, it makes it feel like I'm there. I'm seeing this shit live.

[A]

Oh, okay. That's the business model.

[C]

Yeah. So it's like, just imagine if you get to see this live right now.

[A]

Yeah. Like the. Yeah, it's the same as, like, a sports car.

[C]

And that's, like, the same setup. They got them the cameras that they got, and they got it live, and they go live. And not only that, they're doing it live, and they still dropping it on YouTube and still getting a million views. Cause some people didn't catch it live, so you're getting that. So if y' all ain't started streaming, you need to say, what up? And when they come in here, catch the moment. And then what's good about streaming is that they're clipping it right then and there and putting it on the Internet.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Cause people are getting paid from clip pages.

[A]

And. Wait, how do they get paid? How do they get paid as streamers? Walk me through that.

[C]

So we're getting. Okay, so, like, you. Kasanet streams, and when he streams, you can give, like, $10.

[A]

So that's how they get free.

[C]

$8, $50, 500. So Castanet shouts out everybody, like, oh, shout out to. Shout out to, you know, Blake for the 50 gifted. And he just getting him to say your name. Like, fuck, yeah. I'm gonna send him another 50. So it's like the recognition. Like, imagine Dave Chappelle saying your name on a stream full of all those people. So people.

[A]

Oh, babe. Shout out to Burt, man. His fucking special is awesome. Oh, I'm gonna do that to Kai Salant.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, so I can do that and be like, yo, yo, Kai, it's bert Kreischer. Here's 150 bucks.

[C]

Yeah, send me my special. And they're like. And then fans are like, who is he? Like, who is he? And then you got a fan base saying, that was Burt Kardashian. Yeah.

[A]

I don't know if they're fan. His fan base. Yeah. Who's this boomer in here?

[C]

No, no, no, no. They definitely not. I mean, if anybody. I will say something. Just one. It'll be one person.

[A]

Thank you.

[C]

Well, he's a legend. He's killing it. So.

[A]

You know, you did. You didn't even notice that. I said, walk me through that.

[C]

Oh, yeah, take me through there.

[A]

Oh, I said it wrong.

[C]

Yeah, see?

[A]

Take me through there.

[C]

You know?

[A]

All right. Take me through there. Anything else? Real quick.

[C]

No, I just want people to realize that your time is never over. And it's just. It Just take one person to be a good person. So I just want people to realize that to receive good, you gotta do good and appreciate bad days to appreciate good ones.

[A]

What was the other thing you said is? Don't let anyone be in control of.

[C]

Like, your give a fucks, your mindset, your power. Cause it shows sign of, you know, weakness that somebody can come and, like, put you in a mood. Nobody can put me in a mood, you know, but my kids and I had them. So if it ain't nobody you created, it's all right. I don't have to live in this moment forever.

[A]

Pull up his tour dates real quick. Are you on tour right now?

[C]

Yeah. So I got that. I got my show launching, relaunching, and then you do.

[A]

Do you do seasons of your podcast?

[C]

I think it's that link right there I need to get. No, no. Is it that one?

[A]

That's Ticket Master.

[C]

I got some new ones coming out now. That was. Okay, let's get off that one. All right. Just look on my Instagram page.

[A]

Funnymarco.net.

[C]

Yeah, so I think I got a show on Texas coming up. And. Yeah, see, look, it's all over. I gotta get that together, right? When you search it, that's all I gotta get together. It's okay, y'. All. Y' all ain't gotta look it up. Cause it's like, it's all over in a minute. She gonna end up pulling up.

[A]

Go. What's your Instagram?

[C]

Funny Marco.

[A]

Okay, Go find them on Funny Marco. I'm so glad I met you, you know, like, a year ago. I'm so glad I met you. And I. I always say I'm not comfortable with, like, in the interviews, like, you or Caleb or, like, I'm. I'm always uncomfortable. And I had so much fun doing it. Yeah. And I think about you so much because my daughters say type so much, and. And then when this got set up, I was so excited, man.

[C]

No.

[A]

So there you go. Is that you?

[C]

Yeah, that's me. I was James Brown for a little bit.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Tacoma Comedy Club.

[C]

Yeah. So I'm almost done. I think I'm at St. Joe, like, right there. What's the. I don't even know how to say the other state.

[A]

West Nyack.

[C]

Yeah, I don't.

[A]

West Nyack.

[C]

Is it Brookfield? That one. The Snakes?

[A]

San Jose Improv.

[C]

I'm assuming that's the one I couldn't believe.

[A]

Brookfield Improv. Where's Brookfield Improv?

[C]

Yeah. I think that's Dallas. Is that Dallas?

[A]

Oh, they move it.

[C]

Yeah. I'm not sure.

[A]

Syracuse Funny Bone. That's a great mall. Bring your kids.

[C]

I get anxiety with knowing dates and all that. I just show up, like, knowing dates and where I'm going. It's a lot.

[A]

Oh, Milwaukee.

[C]

Yeah, Milwaukee.

[A]

Oh, fuck, yeah. You're gonna. Have you been to Milwaukee before?

[C]

Yeah, I have. Yeah, I have.

[A]

That's a great. That's. That's a great club. Yeah, it's new. It's newer. I just did Milwaukee the other day.

[C]

Oh, it is nowhere. I did that nowhere right there.

[A]

It's newer for me. I'm. Yeah, okay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I'm an old man.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Hey, I'm not gonna say bye.

[C]

Look at my meet and greets. Click on a girl. Look at how many people. Look at. Let me look at the girls.

[A]

Holy. You just have girls come to your show?

[C]

Yeah, I got a lot of girls.

[A]

Oh, my God. There's raising one.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, you have a lot of women coming to your show.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah, a lot show.

[A]

My meet and greet. A lot of shirtless dudes.

[C]

Right? We want them now.

[A]

Hey, thank you.

[C]

Thank you, too.

[A]

I'm not saying goodbye.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Don't just end it.

[A]

I plan on seeing you a lot in life.

[C]

Yeah, just end it. Guys, camera's just gonna cut off. It's our new thing. We just don't say bye.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Bert and Tom. Tom and Bert. One goes topless while the other wears a shirt. Tom tells stories and Bert's the machine. There's not a chance in hell that they'll keep it clean.

[A]

Here's what we call two bears, one cave.

[C]

Sa.