A Place of Yes | A Grief Podcast

Episode: Finding Movement, Art, and Meaning After Loss
Date: January 21, 2026
Host: Heather Straughter (A)
Guest: Carrie Pill (B)

Episode Overview

In this emotionally honest episode, host Heather Straughter welcomes artist, athlete, and writer Carrie Pill to discuss the multifaceted journey of grief, especially after the loss of both her mother and stepmother within the span of a year. Through stories of movement, art, and the power of writing, Carrie unpacks the messy, surprising, and healing moments that come with loss. The conversation creates space for complicated relationships, anticipatory grief, the physical toll of mourning, and the essential importance of self-compassion and connection.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The “Yes” Question & Movement as Healing

(02:42-05:07)

• Heather opens by asking Carrie what she’s said “yes” to lately, evoking the theme of openness despite grief.
• Carrie shares discovering trail running with a group of women and signing up for new endurance races.
• For her, running and endurance activities provide a temporary escape from emotional turmoil:

  “The rhythm of those long distances where you're just focusing on your steps and your breath... it's very cathartic for healing... you're not thinking about all that stuff for that period of time.” – Carrie (03:38)

2. Remembering Her Mom: Creativity, Connection & Influence

(05:07-08:01)

• Carrie reflects on her mother’s kindness, artistry, and community involvement:
  • Her mom nurtured Carrie’s creativity through encouragement and providing materials.
  • The family’s craft fair trips to Vermont ultimately influenced Carrie’s decision to settle there.

3. The Strange Perceptions of Time in Grief

(08:01-09:22)

• Both discuss how the experience of losing someone profoundly distorts time.
  • “It's such a monumental thing, but it's hard to process. I feel like time is hard to process with grief.” – Heather (08:13)
• Carrie describes “stuffing away” grief while also wanting to honor it.

4. Anticipatory Grief & Emotional Exhaustion

(09:22-12:55)

• Carrie describes watching both her mom and stepmom suffer long illnesses, leading to anticipatory grief and emotional depletion.

  “You’re always waiting for that phone call.” – Carrie (13:55)

  • She realizes only after the fact how physically and mentally spent she was, unable to perform as normal in activities like mountain biking.
  • Heather underscores how society’s images of grief often overlook these hidden forms of stress and self-criticism.

5. The Moment of Loss: Surrounded, Yet Invisible

(13:25-19:58)

• Carrie recounts learning of her mother’s death via voicemail while at a busy ski lodge. Instead of leaving, she chose to stay, ski, and be with loved ones:

  “I just let myself be wrapped in their joy and kindness and understanding and just let myself, you know, go make some turns and zone out in that for a couple minutes…” – Carrie (16:33)

• The hosts reflect on how the “right” response to loss isn’t universal—sometimes healing means blending grief with normalcy and community.
• Heather notes, “Instead of it being super dark... it was I did the thing I love to do... as part of the process of healing, as opposed to a dark memory.” (19:35)

6. Nature as Connection & Ongoing Grief Rituals

(21:21-23:42)

• In the aftermath, Carrie frequently returned to the mountains, finding solace, routine, and a spiritual connection with her mother in nature’s details and seasonal changes.

  “It felt like I was also spending time with her, like, when I'm out in nature.” – Carrie (22:22)

• Small rituals—identifying plants, watching flowers bloom—become ongoing touchpoints for maintaining a sense of presence and pride in her mother’s legacy.

7. Complicated Relationships, Forgiveness & Naming the Inner Critic

(23:50-28:31)

• Both Heather and Carrie talk candidly about the mixed feelings grief can bring: guilt, relief, regret, and even occasional anger.
  • “We can be really hard on ourselves... so grace has helped me a lot.” – Carrie (25:20)
• Carrie introduces her tool for managing negative self-talk: she names her internal critic “Constance” and actively tells her to “back off.”

  “You can go down this rabbit hole... but I'm so regimented... sometimes I'll be like, okay, you have 15 minutes to go down the rabbit hole.” – Heather (27:57)

8. Writing as Connection, Art as Anchor

(29:03-35:36)

• While painting is Carrie’s livelihood, writing has emerged as her bridge out of isolation:

  “Grief is isolating, and writing helped me build a bridge back to connection.” – Carrie (29:47)

• She prefers journaling organically, filling notebooks with a mix of reflections, ideas, and daily logistics. The act of writing clears mental clutter and lets her honor her mother through stories and memories.

9. How Grief Changes Us and Our Relationships

(35:36-42:47)

• Grief deepens empathy but can also make us self-absorbed while healing. Both guests note the duality:

  “You think that, like, you're the only one, because it's just so strong, that feeling... but all of these people have gone through it.” – Carrie (38:21)

• Loss heightens their ability to savor small joys and heightens awareness of life's brevity.

10. Building a Grieving Community: Universal “Grievers”

(42:47-44:14)

• Both discuss “griever” as an inclusive identity, learned from previous podcast guest Shay Wingate.
  • “[The term griever] was such a nice way of saying it without making you feel... different... it's a universal identity that so many of us share.” – Heather (44:04)
• Grieving is positioned not just as loss, but as a catalyst for deeper living and connections.

11. Practical Compassion: The Power of Small Gestures

(44:17-49:36)

• Carrie shares examples of comforting gestures: care packages, food, handwritten notes, and a simple presence.
  • “It felt like two things at the same time. I wanted to be alone. I didn't want to see anybody, and I wanted to be wrapped around, surrounded by everybody that I cared about and be given so much love.” – Carrie (45:07)
• Heather and Carrie stress that gestures needn’t be grand—just tangible reminders that the griever is seen and loved. Even lighthearted gifts or “brain candy” books can help.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On movement as healing:

  “I did recently learn that those of us that are carrying some traumas... it's the rhythm of those long distances... that's very cathartic for healing.” – Carrie (03:32)

• On the awkwardness and normalcy of grief:

  “You're constantly in that type of situation, you're waiting for... the phone call... Even when you know it's going to happen, it happens at just... you're still never ready... It's really so personal, right?” – Heather (17:43)

• On ongoing connection:

  “It felt like I was also spending time with her, like, when I'm out in nature.” – Carrie (22:22)

• On self-compassion:

  “Had I known, I would have given myself more grace. Absolutely.” – Carrie (12:50)

• On the universality of grief:

  “Everybody can be part of these conversations one way or another... it's a thing that I almost feel should be so much more, like, unifying than it is.” – Heather (42:08)

• On reaching out:

  “Probably from the person, it doesn't feel like much, but it... really makes a difference.” – Carrie (48:55)

• On small joys after loss:

  “I’ve always felt like I could let a lot of the small things in and really appreciate... I feel that even more now. Because life is so short.” – Carrie (39:38)

Important Timestamps

• 02:42 - Starting “the yes” question; movement as self-discovery in grief
• 05:16 - Carrie shares about her mother’s influences and legacy
• 09:22 - The experience of anticipatory grief & its physical toll
• 13:55 - Carrie recounts the moment she learned of her mother’s passing
• 19:35 - Rethinking “correct” ways to process loss; comfort in communal spaces
• 22:22 - Linking time in nature to ongoing connection with her mom
• 25:20 - Complicated emotions: regret, relief, grace, naming the inner critic
• 29:47 - The healing potential of writing during grief
• 38:21 - Grief’s impact on empathy, relationships, and connectedness
• 44:04 - “Griever” as a unifying word for the bereaved
• 45:07 - Small, thoughtful gestures that comfort during loss
• 48:55 - The outsize impact of simple acts of support

Final Thoughts

This episode of A Place of Yes is a tender, practical, and permission-giving look at all that grief encompasses. Through Carrie’s candor and warmth, listeners receive not only validation for their own complicated feelings, but numerous practical ideas for healing and supporting others. Above all, Carrie and Heather remind us: there is no one way through loss, but there are countless ways to connect, honor, and find meaning—one “yes,” one story, one small act at a time.