Achieve Your Goals with Hal Elrod – Episode 607: How to Live and Love Fully with John O'Leary
Date: October 15, 2025
Special Guest: John O'Leary

Episode Overview

In this powerful and heartfelt episode, Hal Elrod sits down with inspirational speaker and author John O'Leary on the day his life story, Soul on Fire, premieres in theaters nationwide. They discuss John's extraordinary journey from a childhood tragedy—surviving after burns over 100% of his body—to living a life anchored in love, presence, and service. Together, Hal and John explore themes of unconditional love, resilience, reframing adversity, and the quiet heroism found in everyday people. They also reflect on John's late father and the generational impact of love and intentional presence.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Power of Unconditional Love: Lessons from John’s Father

• The central phrase: John's father’s signature affirmation—“I love you, and there’s nothing you can do about it”—repeats throughout the film and this conversation. It serves as a life model for both John and Hal.
• Presence over Words: Even as Parkinson’s robbed John’s father of speech, his presence and focused attention continued to touch lives.
• Legacy of Love: John reflects on his mission to carry his father’s unconditional love into his own parenting and his work.

Notable Quote:

“That’s who I want to become when I grow up. The kind of man who can look at life, both the good and the bad, and say, I love you and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
— John O’Leary [05:00]

Memorable Moment:
John reveals that over a thousand people attended his father's funeral, a testament to the quiet but profound power of presence and love.
[06:49]

2. Meeting Pain with Hope: Processing Grief and Hardship

• Finding Joy Amid Struggle: John recounts his father’s approach to life and death—embracing both with “excitement, hope, and joy,” a lesson passed on to his family and listeners.
• Living and Dying Well: The story of his son Henry’s innocent reflection—“Dad, what a great way to die”—sparks a moving exploration of reframing loss and pain.
  [11:00]

Notable Quote:

“What my son Henry recognized in his grandpa was a different way to go through life and a different way to go into death. With excitement, with hope, and with joy.”
— John O’Leary [11:35]

3. Redefining Heroism and Impact

• Heroes are All Around Us: John emphasizes that his story is not about a single heroic survivor, but about the web of “ordinary heroes”—family, friends, nurses, mentors—who helped him thrive.
• The Importance of Community: Hal and John discuss how collective and often unsung heroism shapes every success story.
  [14:00]

Notable Quote:

“This isn’t a typical hero story. I think it’s a far more lived out hero story of what we can do in our lives for those around us.”
— John O’Leary [14:40]

4. John’s Story: Trauma, Survival, and Transformation

• The Accident: At age nine, John was burned on 100% of his body, spending five months in the hospital and undergoing dozens of surgeries.
• Initial Responses: Upon regaining the ability to communicate, his first question was “Why me?”—a motif that evolves over time.
• Moving Beyond Survival: After hiding his scars for years and avoiding his story, John finally embraced service and purpose, starting with saying “yes” to speaking at small gatherings.
  [18:08]

Notable Quote:

“Sometimes in life when you’re not sure where to go next, it’s not necessarily about dream boarding or vision casting. Sometimes it’s shutting your eyes and stepping forward and having a little bit of faith.”
— John O’Leary [19:25]

5. Service, Love, and Success

• Service as the Foundation: John and Hal agree that loving and serving others creates meaning and, ultimately, opportunities.
• Daily Practice: John shares lessons from years as a hospital chaplain—loving “the one in front of you”—and the profound impact it has had on his life and success.
  [21:20]

Notable Quote:

“Love the one in front of you. You do that and it will open up the next door that you cannot open up.”
— John O’Leary [21:55]

6. Reframing Adversity: Victim to Victor

• The “Why Me?” Shift: The film and their discussion trace how John’s initial lament—why did tragedy happen to me?—evolved into a grateful awe for his survival and impact.
• Perspective Change: John models the importance of asking “why me?” not as a victim, but in recognition of the blessings and responsibility that come with survival and new opportunities.
  [30:04, 31:08]

Notable Quote:

“Our life changes to the degree we’re willing to flip the script and ask that question, not as a victim to circumstances, but as a victor.”
— John O’Leary [31:08]

7. On Regret, Acceptance, and Moving Forward

• Would He Change the Past?: John shares why he would not go back and prevent his accident, illustrating how his greatest pain led to his greatest gifts—humility, faith, empathy, and purpose.
• Empathizing with Listeners: He offers heartfelt support to anyone suffering, urging them to be present and loving without pushing quick fixes or platitudes.
• Healing is Ongoing: True healing, he explains, is a “wash, rinse, repeat” process over time—not a quick transformation.
  [33:30–36:30]

Notable Quote:

“The best in my life is the result of the worst, and I only got there through the flames. What a gift.”
— John O’Leary [34:25]

8. The “Soul on Fire” Movie: A Celebration of Ordinary Heroes

• Real People, Real Places: The film was shot on location, using the actual sites of key events in John’s life, and featured many real family and friends as extras.
• Powerful Scenes: John’s wedding reenacted in the actual dress, with both actors and his real parents present, serves as his favorite scene—a moving demonstration of triumph, love, and continuity.
• A Call To Action: John encourages listeners not only to see the film, but to reflect on the heroes in their own lives and discuss how to embody similar virtues.
  [37:22–41:52]

Notable Quote:

“In a world that is so focused on first broken garbage, divisiveness, to have a movie of unity and hope and love, that’s good.”
— John O’Leary [38:37]

Timestamps of Important Segments

• [04:28] – The impact of John’s father’s love and presence
• [11:00] – Reframing loss as a “great way to die”
• [14:40] – Everyday heroism in John’s story and the film
• [18:08] – John’s journey from survival to service
• [21:20] – Service as the foundation for a meaningful life
• [30:04, 31:08] – The evolution of “Why me?” from victimhood to gratitude
• [33:35, 34:25] – On regret and embracing scars
• [37:22–41:52] – The making of Soul on Fire and its universal message

Notable Quotes

• “I love you and there’s nothing you can do about it.” — John’s Father [04:28]
• “What my son Henry recognized in his grandpa was a different way to go through life and a different way to go into death. With excitement, with hope, and with joy.” — John O’Leary [11:35]
• “This isn’t a typical hero story. I think it’s a far more lived out hero story…” — John O’Leary [14:40]
• “Sometimes it’s shutting your eyes and stepping forward and having a little bit of faith.” — John O’Leary [19:25]
• “Love the one in front of you…” — John O’Leary [21:55]
• “Our life changes to the degree we’re willing to flip the script and ask that question, not as a victim to circumstances, but as a victor.” — John O’Leary [31:08]
• “The best in my life is the result of the worst, and I only got there through the flames. What a gift.” — John O’Leary [34:25]
• “In a world…to have a movie of unity and hope and love, that’s good.” — John O’Leary [38:37]

Action Steps and Reflections

• Reflect on Your Heroes: After watching Soul on Fire, Hal suggests asking, “Who are the heroes in your life, and how can you be that hero for others?”
• Vote for Uplifting Stories: John encourages support for movies that highlight ordinary heroism, noting the impact audience choices have on the kinds of stories Hollywood produces.
• Live with Presence and Service: Embrace loving “the one in front of you” and frame adversity as an invitation to growth and deeper connection.

Where to Watch Soul on Fire

• Visit soulonfiremovie.com for tickets, showtimes, and streaming options (if listening after the theatrical run).
• Suitable for families, teams, and anyone seeking inspiration and hope.

This episode is an inspiring meditation on resilience, legacy, and the transformational power of love—both given and received. Hal and John model vulnerability, gratitude, and actionable wisdom for living and loving fully, no matter the scars we carry.