The Adam Carolla Show

Guest: Rob Riggle On Why Young Men Need Hardship

Date: February 18, 2026
Host: Adam Carolla | Guest: Rob Riggle
Main Theme: Why hardship and resilience are essential for young men, the value of grit, and personal trajectories in comedy and life.

Episode Overview

In this engaging and characteristically unfiltered episode, comedian, actor, and former Marine Rob Riggle joins Adam Carolla to discuss his book "Grit, Spit and Never Quit" and the critical role of adversity in building resilience, especially among young men. Carolla and Riggle swap stories from their backgrounds in sports, the military, and comedy, reflecting on how tough times and demanding mentors shaped their work ethic and outlook. The episode dives deep into generational changes, the dangers of over-coddling, comedy career trajectories, and the cultural importance of learning to withstand—and benefit from—hardship.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Value of Hardship and Discipline Growing Up

• Military & Sports as Foundations for Resilience:

  • Adam introduces Rob's new book and asks about his time as one of the few Marines in Manhattan ([01:45–03:45]).
  • Riggle details how a strict upbringing through the Marines and football instilled resilience and discipline:

    "The resilience came with it. The discipline came with it. And I didn’t realize those intangibles would pay off all through my life. Still, to this day, still to this day." – Rob ([07:06])

• Comparing Sports Drills to Life Preparation:

  • Adam notes that much of sports and military is “drill, drill, drill,” not direct task practice, yet this instills the discipline needed for any field ([05:58]).

• Feeling of 'Missing Out' vs. Learning Grit:

  • Both Adam and Rob recall starting comedy relatively late after years in other pursuits, which gave them motivation but also a unique bedrock:

    "I always felt that heat on my backside." – Rob ([05:58])

Generational Changes: Hard Coaches, Coddling, and Atrophied Resilience

• Harsh Coaches and Tough Love:

  • Both hosts reminisce about the brutality of 80s football coaching, with vivid descriptions of being denied water and getting chewed out ([14:01–16:50]).
  • Quote:

    "They showed me what I’m really capable of . . . if I can do all these things I didn’t think I could, maybe I could be an actor and a comedian..." – Rob ([10:09])

• Dangers of Removing Resilience-Building Experiences:

  • Both Adam and Rob express concern that young men today are denied hardship and thus lack basic coping skills:

    "We are denying what is a privilege, but we've mistaken it for pain, or we've mistaken it for some sort of punishment..." – Adam ([11:36])

• Coddling as an Unintended Weakener:

  • Rob: "All it did was make them weaker. Their resilience is atrophied." ([14:29])
  • Adam and Rob both describe modern parents’ instincts to shield children from pain, which ironically denies them growth.

    "[My dad said] when you’re out here with the men, this is the standard. And you kind of get a callus for it." – Rob ([25:12])

Masculinity, Feminization, and Teaching Boys

• The 'Feminine Out’:

  • Adam relates a story teaching his son push-ups, only for his wife to step in and undermine the 'tough love' lesson:

    "But it’s the feminine out. And in the past, we went, we had roles . . . now they've wandered out and assumed both roles. And that's not good." – Adam ([23:32])

• Losing Traditional Male Rites of Passage:

  • They lament how classic movie scenes and rites of passage (e.g., being pushed by a drill instructor) are being erased for young men ([11:36–14:28]).

Comedy Careers: Grit, Mentors, Failing, and Returning

Non-Linear Paths and Late Starts

• Rob’s Journey:
  • Marines through his 20s; didn’t try improv until 28; struggled with feeling behind peers ([05:01]).
  • Found a mentor in David Koechner, who connected him with UCB and Chicago improv scene ([27:47]).

Stand-Up vs. Improv (And Finding Confidence)

• Initial Stand-Up Failure, Improv Success, Full Circle Return:

  • Both Adam and Rob started with stand-up, didn’t feel authentic at first, found their voice in improv (Groundlings for Adam, UCB for Rob), and only later returned to stand-up ([29:27–34:26]).
  • On Getting Better at Comedy:

    "I was able to build, you know, a 50 minute set probably in, you know, three to six months." – Rob ([34:26])

• The Hard Grind of Gaining Material:

  • Rob credits frequent open mics in NYC and John Oliver’s encouragement for molding him into a confident stand-up ([31:12–34:26]).

• Value of a Durable Skill:

  • Adam draws a comparison between being a good carpenter and a stand-up:

    "When you’re a good carpenter, you just work. No one cares who you know or what your politics are. You just work. . . . In a way, that’s what stand-up is. The movies, TV comes and goes...But stand-up is that toolbox and that skill." ([38:38–40:03])

Generation Shifts and Societal Reflections

Removing Difficulties: The Consequence for Young People

• Denying Young Men Tough Experiences:

  "We denied them the ability to become resilient...as parents we want to help our children avoid the pain that maybe we endured...all it did was make them weaker." – Rob ([14:01])

• Society’s Over-Control and Anxiety:

  • Attempts to control risks in modern life have led to widespread anxiety and a drop in coping skills ([61:32–62:35]).
  • Adam: "There is a freedom to letting a lot of stuff go. . . . Yanking the wheel is not going to help. It’s better to relax. You’ll survive the accident better." ([61:40])

Notable Quotes and Timestamps

• "The resilience came with it. The discipline came with it. And I didn’t realize those intangibles would pay off all through my life. Still, to this day."
  – Rob Riggle ([07:06])

• "All it did was make them weaker. Their resilience is atrophied."
  – Rob Riggle, on coddling kids ([14:29])

• "We are denying what is a privilege, but we've mistaken it for pain, or we've mistaken it for some sort of punishment..."
  – Adam Carolla ([11:36])

• "I always felt that heat on my backside."
  – Rob Riggle, on late start in comedy ([05:58])

• "I always learned, what I appreciate about them so much now...they would push me beyond that. They say, 'Oh, you think your limits here, your limits way up here.'"
  – Rob Riggle ([09:26])

• "When you're a good carpenter, you just work ... In a way, that's what stand-up is ... you really can't be canceled."
  – Adam Carolla ([38:38–40:03])

• "Nine times out of ten, you stand up to the bully, you take a beating ... My dad was always like: Take the beating, but give it everything you got. That way, the bully will know this is not an easy mark."
  – Rob Riggle ([65:00])

Memorable Moments

• Water Deprivation as Discipline:
  Vivid childhood sports stories about running drills in the heat and not being allowed water to build mental toughness ([14:28–17:08]).

• David Koechner 'Mentor Moment':
  Rob shares how Koechner got him in touch with the right people to break into comedy in NYC ([27:47]).

• Comparison of Stand-Up and Carpentry:
  Adam’s analogy that both careers are based on durable, uncancelable skill sets ([38:38–40:03]).

• Bullies & Lessons:
  Rob’s anecdote on how standing up, even when you lose, teaches you self-respect—and deters future bullies ([65:00–66:01]).

Key Timestamps

• [01:45–07:14]: Riggle’s background, Marines/resilience, and similarities with Adam’s early years.
• [09:07–14:28]: Descriptions of hard coaching, learning about limits, generational differences.
• [14:29–17:44]: Coddling vs. resilience in parenting; consequences for young men.
• [25:12–27:47]: Growing up on a farm and learning “the standard”; Koechner’s mentorship.
• [29:27–34:26]: Comparing stand-up and improv journeys, loop back to stand-up.
• [38:38–40:03]: Carpentry/stand-up analogy; durability of skills.
• [65:00–66:03]: Confronting bullies; lessons from beatings and how they stick with you.

Tone and Style

• Raw, direct, and conversational: Adam’s classic no-holds-barred style meets Rob’s grounded, self-deprecating candor.
• Stories filled with humor and nostalgia for tough love, old-school discipline, and “drill sergeant” mentors.
• Underlying call to action: Society must let young people (especially boys) face and overcome hardship for their own good.

Summary Table for Key Segments

| Time | Segment/Topic | Notable Quotes/Insights | |-----------|----------------------------------------------------------|-------------------------------------------------------| | 01:45–07:06 | Early adversity in military and sports | "Resilience ... discipline ... pay off all through my life." – Rob | | 11:36–14:28 | Modern coddling vs. old-school toughness | "We denied them the ability to become resilient." – Rob | | 25:12–27:47 | Rural work & mentor stories | "You kind of get a callus for it ... this is the standard." – Rob | | 29:27–34:26 | Stand-up and improv career arcs | "I hated it. . . . But improv gave me confidence." – Rob | | 38:38–40:03 | The durable skill analogy: Carpentry & comedy | "When you’re a good carpenter, you just work ... that's what stand-up is." – Adam | | 65:00–66:03 | Facing bullies and learning self-respect | "You take the beating, but . . . the bully will know this is not an easy mark." – Rob |

Final Thoughts

Adam Carolla and Rob Riggle make a compelling case for the necessity of hardship—whether on the sports field, the battlefield, or the comedy stage—in forging adaptable, resilient adults. Their collective experience highlights the danger in overprotecting young people from the natural discomforts of growth. Through sharp anecdotes and plenty of trademark irreverence, listeners are left with a powerful message: hardship, though unpleasant, is a privilege and an irreplaceable teacher.

Book Plug:
Grit, Spit and Never Quit by Rob Riggle is available now.

For More:
Catch The Adam Carolla Show at AdamCarolla.com and watch full shows on YouTube.