Drew Lynch On When Commercials Used to Be Great + Met Gala CRINGE!

Summary

The Adam Carolla Show

Episode: Drew Lynch On When Commercials Used to Be Great + Met Gala CRINGE!

Date: May 6, 2026
Host: Adam Carolla
Guest: Drew Lynch (Comedian), Rudy Pavage (News)

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Episode Overview

This episode features a wide-ranging, humorous conversation between Adam Carolla and comedian Drew Lynch, with the latter sharing insights from his life, career, and rehabilitation from a traumatic injury. The duo nostalgically riff on the glory days of funny TV commercials, drawing out classic ad memories and lamenting modern sensitivity in advertising. Later, Adam and Rudy dissect the absurdities of celebrity culture through their annual Met Gala rundown, dive into the myth-making of family lore, and mock the circuitous nature of political endorsements. Extended rants on pharmaceuticals, charity grift, and the state of Los Angeles also appear, all presented with Adam’s classic, unfiltered wit.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Drew Lynch’s Journey: Comedy, Injury, and Recovery

(03:20 — 11:42)

• Drew’s Background: Born in Indiana, lived in Las Vegas as a kid, moved to Sherman Oaks, CA at 18 to pursue acting, not comedy.
• Serious Injury: At age 20, while playing rec softball, Drew suffered a traumatic brain injury (TBI) and vocal contusion. The injury led to a severe stutter, transforming both his life and career trajectory.
  • “Smacking my head on the ground left me with a TBI. And I had a vocal contusion. It changed my speech pattern for almost over a decade.” (04:54, Drew Lynch)
• Rehabilitation Tactics: Speech/physical therapy, strict keto diet to reduce inflammation and neurologic symptoms, brain exercises, and even psychedelics.
  • “Keto sucks. You get rid of all the sugar… Your brain's preferred method of fuel is oils and fats… I got really, really cut for about eight months.” (09:52, Drew Lynch)
• Humor in Hardship: Drew finds self-deprecation and making others comfortable with his speech “awkwardness” to be critical for personal and social ease.

2. Nostalgia for Commercials: When Ads Were Funny

(12:17 — 19:12)

• Classic Campaigns: Adam and Drew reminisce about Budweiser’s “Real Men of Genius” and Reebok’s “Terry Tate: Office Linebacker” campaigns.
  • “We used to do funny ad campaigns. Now they're all super sensitive… everything's tugging at the heartstrings.” (12:38, Adam Carolla)
  • [Plays full Taco Salad "Real Men of Genius" commercial] (14:03)
• Relatability: Both men agree modern commercials lack charm because of political correctness and risk-aversion.
  • “A commercial could have seasons is pretty insane.” (18:38, Drew Lynch)
• Behind the Scenes: The level of real stunt work and production value behind old ads is discussed, especially in the Terry Tate series.

3. Family Lore & “Up-Rounding”: Myth-making at Home

(32:45 — 52:57)

• Adam’s Family Myths: Tales of his father's alleged trumpet tour with the Baja Marimba Band, and his mother’s supposed friendship with Carol Burnett. Adam investigates these claims, finding most are exaggerated or outright fiction.
  • “My dad never had a penny. So wouldn't it stand to reason that if you went on tour with a super popular band… you would actually get paid to go on tour?” (40:13, Adam Carolla)
• Sisterly “Up-Rounding”: Adam’s sister tends to embellish family stories, leading to some gentle tease and fact-checking.
  • “She laughed. At a certain point she said, well, maybe I'm kind of an up rounder. Like, maybe I just go positive. And then she said, better than being a down rounder.” (50:45, Adam Carolla)
• Drew’s Family Lore: Dad’s HVAC company worked in Wayne Newton’s neighborhood. Both hosts agree: almost every family clings to some tangential celebrity connection.

4. The Met Gala: Mocking Celebrity Absurdity

(77:41 — 84:54)

• Rudy’s Report: This year's Met Gala, sponsored by Jeff Bezos, featured pre-show calls for celebrity boycotts but predictably turned into another self-congratulatory spectacle.
• Fashion Critique: Adam ridicules the over-the-top gowns and the entourage required to manage them. He draws a metaphor about female relationships and power dynamics from the spectacle of women parading with massive trains attended by aides.
  • “Every single one of these women show up with these huge trains and they have five women behind them… That's their relationship. They like that relationship with women.” (80:31, Adam Carolla)
• Celebrity Guests: Special mention of Lena Dunham’s “not funny” legacy, more lighthearted slams at woke Hollywood, and the ongoing oddity of the event.

5. Rant: Giving, Charity, and Grift

(69:00 — 73:05)

• Charity Event Skepticism: Adam rails against the inefficiency and corruption in charity events and NGOs—often, he argues, the money ends up benefitting grifters, not those in need.
  • “All of that money gets fucking drained off to NGOs. What do you think's going on in Somalia?... We still grifted and grafted and stole all the money. So you tell me how this is going to work in a third world nation.” (70:19, Adam Carolla)
• Notable Quote: “Nobody is against feeding the world's hungry… what we don't want is the money going to people that then buy Lamborghinis and fund their wars.” (69:07, Adam Carolla)
• Bono’s Evolving View: Bono is quoted recognizing that commerce—not just aid—lifts people from poverty.

6. Hot Takes: Politics, Pharmaceuticals, and LA

(91:00 — 96:18)

• Pharmaceutical Overuse/Critique: RFK Jr.’s campaign against widespread antidepressant use (especially in children) is praised. Adam and Rudy both reflect on how their childhoods were essentially free of such medications.
  • “One in six American adults takes an antidepressant. One in ten children are on prescription medication for their mental health.” (91:12, Rudy Pavage reading RFK Jr.)
• Insurance Companies, Government, & LA’s Problems: Extended riffs on insurance companies dodging claims post-wildfires, and the empty promises and blame-passing endemic to LA city government.
• Kamala Harris & Political Endorsements: More evidence, Adam argues, of tribal and superficial politics—“Is there any possibility that a person of color would not endorse another person [of color]? I mean, if they were a Republican, they wouldn’t…” (104:37, Adam Carolla)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Nutrition & Recovery:
  “Your brain's preferred method of... nutri[tion]... is oils and fats. You know, we fill it with like carbohydrates. But its preferred method is oils and fats.” (09:52, Drew Lynch)
• On Commercials:
  “There is nothing… you can't ultimately do better than a sandwich.” (13:19, Adam Carolla)
• On “Up-Rounding” Family Stories:
  “Women know actual events pretty well, but they know made up events better.” (38:19, Adam Carolla)
• On Aid & NGOs:
  “We can't pull this shit off [charity] in modern times in the middle of Los Angeles... and we're still grifting... What do you think's going on abroad?” (70:19, Adam Carolla)
• On Met Gala Ridiculousness:
  “Women, you gotta move my train around and then get your fucking ass out of the way. The metaphor for life.” (82:06, Adam Carolla)
• On Pharmaceuticals:
  “That is insane. That one out of every six kids… has a medicine cabinet just filled with shit that they don't need to be on.” (92:41, Adam Carolla)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Time | Segment/Topic | |-----------|---------------------------------------------------------| | 03:20 | Drew Lynch’s injury and stuttering journey | | 09:52 | Keto diet for neurological recovery | | 12:17 | The “Real Men of Genius” campaign riff | | 15:41 | Terry Tate, Office Linebacker, classic ads | | 32:45 | Adam confronts family legends with his sister | | 50:45 | Up-rounding vs. down-rounding (embellishing stories) | | 69:07 | Adam’s rant: Charity, grift, and celebrity philanthropy | | 77:41 | Met Gala fashion commentary & social dynamics | | 91:12 | RFK Jr. & the antidepressant debate | | 104:37 | Kamala Harris and identity politics |

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Tone & Style

Unfiltered, sharp, and irreverent, this episode brims with Adam’s signature observational rants, quick-witted banter, and a deep-seated nostalgia for the days when both TV advertising and public discourse were less sanitized. The interplay with Drew Lynch is playful and candid, often moving seamlessly from the personal to the cultural to the absurd. Rudy’s news segments amplify the show’s satiric edge, with the group lampooning not just politics and entertainment, but their own families and foibles too.

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For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

This episode delivers a classic Adam Carolla experience—hilarious personal stories, smart cultural critique, and a relentless skewering of modern “progress.” Drew Lynch’s unique journey adds a layer of inspiration and human interest. Whether you love pop-culture deep-cuts, media criticism, or just want to laugh at the expense of celebrities, PC culture, and the rituals of American life, this episode is a must-listen.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

In this episode, comedian Drew lynch comes by. Also, Rudy's gonna do the news and we'll do that right after this. Thanks for tuning in to the Adam Carolla Show. You can watch the full show on YouTube just search Adam Carolla show and hit subscribe so you never miss an episode. You can also get the podcast wherever you like to listen. And for extra content, ad free episodes and more, you can head over to our substack and sign up today. This is Adam Carolla from the Adam Carolla Show. If you care about predictions, you care about props. And right now, it's all about playoff pressure. From the hardwood to the ice, every possession, every shift, every shot. Well, it all matters. BetOnline has always been the home of real sports betting, deep markets, sharp odds and player props built for fans who know these games aren't random. The NBA playoffs are heating up, stars taking over, series swinging on a single score. And in the NHL, it's all speed, grit and sudden death. Moments where one goal changes everything. Lines tighten, pressure builds and betonline delivers. Live betting and in game odds that move win with every bucket, every breakaway, every goal. This is where the action happens, where experience shows, and where the smallest edge makes the biggest difference. Bet online. The game starts here.

[Drew Lynch]

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[Rudy Pavage]

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[Dawson]

From Corolla One Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla Show. Adam's guest today, comedian Drew lynch and the News with Rudy Pavage. And now, Adam Carolla.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, get it. You have to get it on. No choice but to get it on. Mandate. Get it on. And welcome Drew lynch, comedian to the show he's got a very funny special out on YouTube, the stuttering comedian. It's available as we speak. Live dates coming up as well. I'll tell you about that in a moment. Good to see you, Drew.

[Drew Lynch]

Hey, Adam. Thanks for having me back.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Where are you out of right now?

[Drew Lynch]

I'm out of Sherman Oaks, California, baby.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Drew Lynch]

Yes, sir.

[Adam Carolla]

I grew up around that area. Sherman Oaks. For those who don't know the topography here, it's about the best place you can live to get to everywhere. It's not exactly in one place or another place. It's just the hub. It's like, I don't know, Atlanta or something. It just gets you everywhere fast.

[Drew Lynch]

It is. It's the delta of North Hollywood.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's what it is. So where are you from originally?

[Drew Lynch]

I'm from Indiana originally, and then I lived in Vegas for about nine or 10 years. Then I moved out here when I was 18.

[Adam Carolla]

So what's the journey with comedy like? There's people that watch comedy when they're young and go, I want to do that. And then there are other people that are funny, and so they end up doing it, and then they're sort of all in between on neither of those. Which one are you?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, neither. No, I actually just. I watched it when I was young, but I never wanted to do it. I moved out here when I was really young to do acting, and I had had. Maybe in my first year I was out here, I had already had some. I would say some substantial momentum in, like, booking TV stuff and some. Some. Some auditions and callbacks and things. I had a freak injury when I was 20 where I had tried to field a softball from a. From a grounder on a flapper. Remember, you know Flappers Comedy Club? They used to work the door there, and they had that.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, Flappers is a mile from here.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, and they. I used to work the door there, and they had a rec softball league, and, you know, smacking my head on the ground left me with a tbi. And I had a vocal contusion. It changed, basically my speech pattern for almost over a decade.

[Adam Carolla]

So the ball took a bad hop.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And you were playing the infield.

[Drew Lynch]

Shortstop, yeah. Shortstop.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, well, you must add some game.

[Drew Lynch]

It was okay. I mean, I grew up playing baseball, so I felt pretty confident. And honestly, I've had so many. You know, I've had so many injuries over the years, but none that was one that was, like, head related and one where it left, like, rendered my motor skills different than they were before, and it affected my speech quite a bit. Like, it wasn't even like. It was like a. It wasn't even like. It was like, oh, this is kind of different. It was, like, noticeable staccato, just disjointed speech. And so when I told you.

[Adam Carolla]

Let me just back up for a second.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

The ball sent you to the ground, but the ground caused the injury.

[Drew Lynch]

The God. The ground caused the injury. The ground was the larger of the two injuries. That was where I got the ball.

[Adam Carolla]

Took a bad hop, hit you in the head.

[Drew Lynch]

Throat.

[Adam Carolla]

Throat, yeah. And that put you down?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, I got. I got really winded, and I just, like. I just fell down, but smacking my head on the ground.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, you fell backwards?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. Hitting me, hitting me, hitting my head on the ground from behind was one that was like. That was the larger of the two injuries. That was. It was a. It was a major concussion with a. With a vocal contusion was the initial diagnosis. And everybody thought that it was from the. Just the grounder itself, but it really is just the impact against the ground.

[Adam Carolla]

Hitting your head backwards on the ground really causes the concussion.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Who hit the ball?

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, I have no idea. It wasn't somebody who, like, it was somebody. I think we were playing, like, Burbank Fire Department that day or something like that. So it's a bunch of just like, guys who just. Low center of gravity could just smack the crap out of the ball, and they don't. You know, they're upset with, like, their. Their wives cooking and stuff. So they.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a little bit of a feather in the guy's cap to almost kill somebody with a softball.

[Drew Lynch]

I think so, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, it's like kind of like having your hands registered in a county or being thrown out of a casino for winning too much. Like, it doesn't sound good at first glance, but it's kind of a feather in the cap.

[Drew Lynch]

I think they still talk about it at their. At their precinct. For sure.

[Adam Carolla]

If somebody said, like, how's your game? You're looking pretty good. Swing the bat. Almost killed a comedian.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, Almost killed. It's like, wow, I wasn't even a comedian at that time, but almost killed, like, a. Yeah, Doorman. Almost killed a doorman one by one, just picking him off so bad.

[Adam Carolla]

Bounce hits you in the throat, it knocks you backwards.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, I just fell backwards and just

[Adam Carolla]

hit my head on the dirt infield. Right. And then, like, woke up in the hospital or woke up to people around you.

[Drew Lynch]

I actually don't remember from that Day. I remember everybody on the team telling me about what happened afterwards. So I was scheduled to work the door later that day. And then when I went in later that later that day for my shift, everybody was talking about how disoriented I was and how I was not really making a whole lot of sense. So they sent me home. And when I went home, I went to sleep. And then I woke up the next day and everything was different. I don't even remember the next day. I remember my roommate crying over the sink, which was strange. I do remember that part. And I remember he drove me to the hospital crying for you, I think. So we were friends. And then my parents flew out later that afternoon, come see me in the hospital.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. And so did you have to, by the way, you're kind of pretty lucky. Cause when you get concussed, you're not supposed to go to sleep.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, I didn't know that at the time. And I don't think anybody else knew anything.

[Adam Carolla]

Nobody knew anything either.

[Drew Lynch]

I think people just thought I was like tired from the day or whatever. I've had several different people who worked that day just say to me after the fact, they were like, yeah, something was just kind of off. So we sent you home.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you have to go through therapy in order for speech and things like that? Because I don't hear you stuttering.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, it's been, you know, that was almost 15 years ago. And you know, like, I went. I've done everything. Like, I've done speech therapy and physical therapy. And I did keto for however many months to try to heal the bruising on my brain. And I met with a neurologist and I was doing, you know, I was doing like, I did psychedelics for a little while.

[Adam Carolla]

How was keto?

[Drew Lynch]

I mean, how'd that affect you? Keto sucks. Keto sucks. But you get rid of all the sugar. Your brain's preferred. Your brain's preferred method of like, source of nutrients and fuel is oils and fats. You know, we fill it with like carbohydrates. But its preferred method is oils and fats. And so if you're trying to like get some neurons to re fire and access a different part of your brain a different way. Again, the best way is to eliminate all inflammation. Inflammation. And that's done through getting rid of sugars. And there's sugars in bread, there's sugars in carbs. So I got really, really cut for about eight months or so and did anti saccades and brain exercises. Working with things on the left side of my body. Because the left side of my body was different, the motor skills on that side was not as functional over the years manifested through my speech. So I've done all types of different rehabilitative therapies. And a lot of it has just been finding how other people might feel about it and maybe feel awkward about it and be okay with the fact that they might feel awkward about it. That makes me feel more comfortable.

[Adam Carolla]

So the keto, did that change anything else in your life? Have more energy, or did it do help you Cranky?

[Drew Lynch]

Crankier.

[Adam Carolla]

Because people love. People fucking love pizza.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, man. Yeah, it's. There's nothing better than, like, you know, a sandwich. You know, there's nothing better.

[Adam Carolla]

There's nothing better than a sandwich.

[Drew Lynch]

And a pizza is just a flat sandwich. And find different ways to eat a sandwich. You know, a salad is a sandwich with the. With the crout, with the bread, like, put up. You know, like, a salad is just a sandwich with more of the middle part that's not as fun. All the stuff that you pick off so.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, the thing about a salad is

[Drew Lynch]

a taco is a sandwich.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it can just be a lettuce and garbanzo beans, but in which case it sucks. The best ones are basically a deconstructed sandwich. Like lots of croutons, lots of turkey and ham and cheese. And what you essentially. I mean, the taco salad is the ultimate. It's essentially a burrito that somebody just barfed into a bowl.

[Drew Lynch]

Absolutely. You get all the credit for someone next to you saying, oh, he's healthy.

[Adam Carolla]

He went with the thing has the word salad in it.

[Drew Lynch]

He eat that sandwich with a fork. He's so healthy.

[Adam Carolla]

You ever hear the Real Men of Genius Budweiser campaign?

[Drew Lynch]

No. What is that?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, you're too young.

[Drew Lynch]

Was this in the 90s?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I'm looking at you, Dawson. But they had the Real Men of Genius, and it was a really funny campaign. Like, it's back. We used to do funny ad campaigns. Now they're all super sensitive.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, and everything's tugging at the heartstrings.

[Drew Lynch]

No men.

[Adam Carolla]

No white men drink beer. Occasionally a couple of gay white guys

[Drew Lynch]

and occasionally gay white guys drink beer now.

[Adam Carolla]

Used to do funny campaigns. And the Real Men of Genius one was really funny, and a lot of them were funny. But the taco salad inventor guy was funny because it's basically what we're saying. It's like. It's literally a salad that has 10,000 calories. You know, What? I mean, yeah, I don't know. It must be. It's on the Internet somewhere. I'm looking at. Dawson.

[Drew Lynch]

A beer is also a sandwich. It's just a bread. That's the yeast and the bread, like, juiced.

[Adam Carolla]

There is nothing there. You're right. You could do different. Like, you can do surf and turf and you can do everything, but you can't ultimately do better than a sandwich.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, the problem.

[Adam Carolla]

There is a problem. You have it, Dawson.

[Dawson]

I do have it. And to your point. Andrew's point. And to connect them a little more.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Dawson]

A taco salad is like a burrito without, you know, it's. But a burrito is a sandwich.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, that's right. And also. But here, I'll tell you, there is a little bit of a problem. The sandwich is great, but you have your own sandwich that you like to dial in. And people who work at places now are so fucking out of it that they will fuck it up. You have to go there and, like, watch them make the sandwich. Because if you go no mayo, that means heavy mayo. If you go light mustard, that means no mustard. Like, they will fuck your sandwich up. Like, I do not do the. Here's what I want online. I'm like, I show up at the place and stand there. I need to focus. I need to do the Robert De Niro two fingers point, you know? All right. Real men of genius Taco salad. One Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius. Real men of genius. Today we salute you, Mr. Giant Taco Salad Inventor. Mr. Giant Taco Salad Inventor. Ground beef, refried beans, guacamole cheese, sour cream. And if there's any room left, a few shreds of lettuce. I don't see no lettuce. A culinary creation that baffles the human mind. A 12,000 calorie salad. A caromba. Some may ask, is your taco salad healthy? Of course it is. It's a salad, isn't it? You can eat that deep fried country bowl. So crack open a nice cold Bud Light. Conquistador of the calorie. You put the feast in Fiesta. Mr. Giant Taco Salad in bed. Yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

So good. I have heard those. Not that one specifically, but yeah, very good.

[Adam Carolla]

It's perfect, right?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, it's just perfect.

[Adam Carolla]

There's a little room, a shred of lettuce.

[Drew Lynch]

I actually miss when advertisements used to be next to the thing. Like, you know, like next to it. Like, not about the product you're selling, but it's just like, here's a funny sketch here's just a silly concept. They still kind of do that. But it really felt like early 2000s 90s, they had just prime television commercials. Just prime. Here's a silly thing, and here's our product. And you like that product because the team invested some comedy into their marketing.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I miss those campaigns. The best one that you haven't seen. We won't go into it, but I will tell. And I'm looking at you, Dawson, because it was. The guy's last name was Tate, but it was all. I think it was Reebok. It was office linebacker.

[Drew Lynch]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

That was like, the greatest campaign ever. It was a dude who worked in an office setting, but he was a linebacker. And he took. He took everyone out. And it was great stunts. It was like, great premises. And then at some point, like in season whatever, another linebacker showed up and Tate went on vacation, and that guy, like, took his starting spot and it turned into a whole telenovela. Yeah, it was all super, super funny. It was crazy stunts. And action. This guy was just cleaning out people. It wasn't AI or done in front of a green screen or anything. What was his first name? His last name was Tate.

[Drew Lynch]

Terry Tate.

[Adam Carolla]

Terry Tate, office linebacker. I just need 40 seconds of that Reebok to send us Terry Tate. Some people thought we were crazy, but I'm a firm believer in paradigm breaking outside the box thinking. Hey, buddy. Break was over 15 minutes ago, Mitch. And since Terry's been with us, our productivity has gone up 46%. She's getting more from our employees than ever before. You know, you need a cover sheet on your TPS reports, Richard. That ain't new, baby.

[Rudy Pavage]

Hey, Terry.

[Adam Carolla]

Hey, Janice. But what's really impressed me is how Terry's become part of the Felcher family. How did you get high, baby? He fits right in here. That's a long distance call, Doug. To be honest, I wish. Reebok sent us 10 Terry Tates. Doing a big game. Gene woman. It's game time. It's pain time, baby. Woo. Terry Tate off as linebacker. It's the greatest. By the way, I've sat and watched, like, 26 of those in a row.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, they're so good.

[Adam Carolla]

Later on, a white guy shows up and he's taking his place, and Terry has to fight for his spot as linebacker, and there becomes a rivalry between the two. It just keeps going.

[Drew Lynch]

It's television in between your television. That's what I like. The fact that a commercial could have seasons is pretty insane. It's pretty insane, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. I Mean, they did. I'm just gonna guess there was at least 20 installments of Terry Tate, office linebacker. But, yeah, everything. See, everything's gotta be put through committee. Now, that would have been too violent and they would have. Somebody's wife would have taken some offense and then at some point somebody would have called it racist and then they would just would have shut the whole. The whole thing down.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. Which I don't know how. You can't look at any of that and just see that it's about the objectivity of work related performance. That's it. I like the fact that he can spear anyone, you know, that's so silly.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. By the way, they would never allow a woman to be clotheslined like he was doing. And by the way, I don't know how they did those stunts, but they did serious. I mean, those couldn't have been actors. They all had to be stunt people. Right?

[Drew Lynch]

Crazy. Everybody. Even Terry.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, I don't know how you feel about. Yeah, well, Terry Tate, the actor, definitely played at least some college ball like that. That much.

[Drew Lynch]

Well, Terry, I know he was an actual NFL linebacker. Right.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, you'd have to.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know.

[Drew Lynch]

It looks like Andrew Singer.

[Adam Carolla]

No, well, I'm saying he could have played college. Could have played at Michigan or something. Never made it. Lester, what's his name?

[Drew Lynch]

Spade.

[Adam Carolla]

Spade. And his 62 years of age?

[Drew Lynch]

Six. Six.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, is he six? Six. There's a lot of dude. Former American. Let's see this. Let's see. Terry Tate, linebacker, series, commercials, debuted in super bowl, whatever. Did he play pro? No. Let's see. Professional football. Oh, and wrestling. After graduating college in 85, he attempted to play in the NFL but did not. See? That's how good the NFL is. Even guys that are huge and are great and were great at their job, were great in college, don't make it.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, we had some of the same stuff in our Wikipedias.

[Adam Carolla]

You ran a 4, 3, 40?

[Drew Lynch]

Well, I attempted to play in the NFL, but I just didn't ultimately. Yeah, I thought it was mine for a second.

[Adam Carolla]

Did that say he did a 4, 340? That cannot be 4, 3.

[Drew Lynch]

He's crazy. He did not. In the NFL.

[Adam Carolla]

That cannot be. That cannot be. Where is that? Same year, during tryouts, he ran a four, three, four. He's six, six, four, three. That's not right.

[Drew Lynch]

That's crazy.

[Adam Carolla]

Something. That's a typo.

[Drew Lynch]

Wikipedia is ironclad, Adam.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so let me ask you this, Drew.

[Drew Lynch]

Sure.

[Adam Carolla]

Your family, what are they? What Business are they in?

[Drew Lynch]

Well, my dad was in, like, H Vac for a really long time. That was why we moved out to Vegas, was heating and air conditioning. Mostly air conditioning. And that was kind of the transition from Indiana to.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you have to work for him?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, at one point. That was one of my first jobs. I worked for them, just kind of doing, like, printing catalogs. Nothing. Manual label.

[Adam Carolla]

You're not a huge guy. You'd be good to crawl around an attic?

[Drew Lynch]

I think so. I think I'm agile and I'm flexible, and I am able to. I'm able to kind of rummage.

[Adam Carolla]

You're a good rummager.

[Drew Lynch]

I can rummage in a crawl space.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, like in VR in Vietnam, the guys who were the tunnel rats were the little guys.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, I'm a tunnel rat.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm surprised your dad didn't put you up in an attic or underneath a crawl space.

[Drew Lynch]

I did, but never for work.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, just for his own sadistic pleasure.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, that's just. You know, it was just our relationship. We loved each other and.

[Adam Carolla]

So your dad was an H Vac guy?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. Do people see.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I don't know.

[Drew Lynch]

I've been saying H Vac. That's what I heard men say.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on. They used to. They used to say H vac.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, didn't it?

[Adam Carolla]

And then they changed it to H vac.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, man. Now it's like, LGB something plus community.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. See, here's what we do. We pronounce something one way for a long time, and then we get tired of it, and we pronounce it another way.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, nice.

[Adam Carolla]

But it's because people want to correct other people.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So it was the Cannes Film Festival for a long time. And then it was explained it's the Cannes Film Festival. And then everyone started saying Cannes, and then it went back to Cannes.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So we just. It's People toggle.

[Drew Lynch]

I relate to that because my parents growing up, they were like. They used to call me Andrew. And then it changed to, like, piss aunt. You know, kind of similar. It's French. It's French.

[Adam Carolla]

My grandmother famously told me that it was not. Okay, I'm trying to. I gotta think of the. I gotta think of wasn't. It'll come to me the second.

[Dawson]

You know, Maria Conchita Alonso. She used to be Maria Conchita Alonso, and now she's Maria Conchita Alonzo.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, there's that.

[Dawson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

We gotta put a little flavor on everything.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

But there's. There are words. Mostly the left changes Them. And they just sort of change the pronunciation of them for a little while. They'll always do that. Like, remember Obama never called ISIS isis. He called it isil.

[Dawson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

That's just to prove to you that he knows more shit than you know. Even though you know it is.

[Dawson]

They just did it with UFOs. They're now UOPS.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, right.

[Drew Lynch]

I'm just now finding out that it's ISIS. I was calling it is.

[Adam Carolla]

Is Izz. Is.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. They're so active.

[Adam Carolla]

I know. No, he called it isil. And it's not like it was spelled the same, but isil. And there's. Yes, he would call it isil.

[Drew Lynch]

That's like isis, like brother. Right. The one that's like playing the Game boy in the corner. And he's like, I don't want to behead today. And you're like, come on, Aysel, get up, button up your sweater and let's. You know.

[Adam Carolla]

Or it's like some sort of grim fairy tale where it's like Gretel Eisel. We're going to grandma's house.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[Adam Carolla]

Then we're gonna blow up a mosque.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Or synagogue.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. It's a long trek into town.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. We're gonna pass a few synagogues. We can blow them up.

[Drew Lynch]

Synagogue, synagogue.

[Adam Carolla]

You get with isil. Yeah, yeah. I still don't know why Obama did it, other than to just be smarter. Smarter than you. My. Oh, I gotta think of my grandma. I've told the story a million times of having like a senior. Senior moment about how my grandmother would. Would pronounce. Think of it. It's like labia or labia or something like that.

[Drew Lynch]

Your grandma's talking about her labia.

[Adam Carolla]

My grandmother?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, the menorah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. It's clitoris and clitoridis. My grandmother was weird. And here's what my grandmother did. And then I kind of realized this. And I don't know if you guys pick up this vibe or not, but people do two things to control. Okay. You know the asshole who you run into and you go, you don't remember me, do you? And you go, I meet a lot of people and they go, you don't remember me, do you? And it's like, okay, what's that person doing? That person's trying to control the conversation. And all of a sudden you're the star, but you're back on your heels. You're like, you look familiar.

[Drew Lynch]

I'm trying.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I'm trying.

[Drew Lynch]

I think. I know.

[Adam Carolla]

I feel bad. And that person's just controlling the conversation. And when people check your pronunciation, they're just controlling the conversation. And when people tell you sort of weird and shocking things, also the people. Like, the people control the conversation. They'll go. They'll be talking to you, and they'll go, is that a zit? You got a zit.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, goodness.

[Adam Carolla]

What happened on your forehead? And all of a sudden you go, oh. You start, like, apologizing. Yeah, I didn't wash my face before I went to, like, they. It's a way to control the conversation. My grandmother would tell you your pronunciation was wrong on stuff, and then she would give a little shock value.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, so can you give me an example?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. She told me it's not pronounced clitoris. It's pronounced clitoris.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, man.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

And then it was like a. And then it was like a show. Like, she would be like, here's a diagram. She said, what's the shock factor? I mean, that's a shocking factor.

[Adam Carolla]

It's uncomfortable to talk to your grandmother about lady parts.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Adam Carolla]

And you can. I'm curious, because she told me her doctor friend said clitoris, and I said, well, Dr. Drew says clitoris. And then we went and looked it up in the dictionary together.

[Drew Lynch]

Either one I've never been able to find. Can I tell you what is the significance for why you would need to know that in her mind? Why is she, like. Just so you know.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a good point.

[Drew Lynch]

When you. If or when you ever come to find this thing and you talk into it, it is pronounced, and then the word.

[Adam Carolla]

I'll tell you why.

[Drew Lynch]

And are you supposed to talk into him, Mike? I have no idea.

[Adam Carolla]

No.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, do you talk to him?

[Adam Carolla]

They. You got to whisper.

[Dawson]

Oh, okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Like the horse.

[Drew Lynch]

Like, sensitive.

[Adam Carolla]

The reason she told me that is. Cause I was doing a show called Loveline, and it would come up on the show.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, interesting.

[Adam Carolla]

And somebody must have told her that on the show. We were mispronouncing it.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, you're just throwing.

[Dawson]

Right. But it was something that she brought up.

[Drew Lynch]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

She brought it.

[Dawson]

Adam didn't say, hey, how do you say this?

[Adam Carolla]

We were taught.

[Dawson]

We were discussing grandma.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? We were discussing it. She brought it up. And if you look it up, and I'm curious if it still stands, because we looked it up and it said, pronounce it either way.

[Drew Lynch]

Either one.

[Adam Carolla]

By the way, what do I need you for, dictionary. If you're just gonna go do whatever you want, what do we need you for? Fucking declare. Major clitoris. Major psycho.

[Drew Lynch]

Rise.

[Dawson]

I have to often look up how

[Adam Carolla]

to pronounce certain words.

[Dawson]

And so they're all over the place. Anyway. It says how to pronounce clitoris two ways.

[Drew Lynch]

Yes.

[Dawson]

So there you go.

[Adam Carolla]

I reject this two ways thing because we have words. There's ways to pronounce words, and we rely on dictionaries to guide us. And if the dictionary is just throwing their hands up or going, flip a coin, fuck you, what do we need you for?

[Drew Lynch]

Exactly.

[Dawson]

Here's what AI offers. Although we've proven AI wrong in many cases on this show. It says the correct pronunciation of clitoris is clit. Ris.

[Drew Lynch]

Clit.

[Dawson]

The wrist, with emphasis on all three syllables, clitoris.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so that's what AI says.

[Drew Lynch]

You know, AI's never been with a woman. Said by someone who's never been with a woman. That's what. That's what AI is.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's right.

[Drew Lynch]

It's clit.

[Dawson]

Speaking of that, I got a voicemail today, and it prints out the voicemail on your screen and it says, happy birthday, Michael. This is Vanna, your virtual Toyota assistant.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow.

[Dawson]

No, it's not.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, is it your birthday?

[Adam Carolla]

It is, yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

Happy birthday.

[Dawson]

Yeah, whatever.

[Adam Carolla]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Dawson]

Not why I brought it up, but I got a virtual birthday greeting from an AI.

[Drew Lynch]

Do you drive a Toyota?

[Dawson]

I do.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, okay. That would be a weird thing to get otherwise.

[Adam Carolla]

So here's the question. I've talked about the fact that my dad, who was an amateur trumpet player, never made any money playing the trumpet. But he always. He loved playing the trumpet, and he talked about it all the time and always brought it with him. It was. I was listening to some easy listening station on Sirius xm and a band came up that I remember from my youth, which is the Baja Marimba Band. The Baja Marimba Band was a band that was formed basically because of the success of the Tijuana Brass. Herb Alpert, trumpet player, still alive. And A of A and M Records, formed the Tijuana Brass. Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass. And they had tons of hits and made tons of money. So they started with Herb Alpert's best friend, Julius Wector. They started a Baja Marimba band, which is basically, you know, like, going, we're making money. You guys should tour and do that too. I remember having some distant memory about my dad, like, trying out for the Baja Marimba Band.

[Drew Lynch]

Ooh, nice.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Except for he never made it. Still, that was my dad playing the trumpet. To be fair to him, he was 89 when he did it. But I visited my sister the other day and I was telling her I was driving in my car and the Baja Marimba Band came on. And she said, yeah, dad toured with them. And I said, he did? Oh, yeah, he toured with the Baja Marimba Band. And the Baja Marimba Band was a big band back in the day with real world class players. So then I said I was thinking about that the other day, but I don't think he did. Now I'm at a weird crossroads because my dad's dead and I'm in the unfortunate position of talking my sister out of the knowledge that my dad ever toured with the Baja Marimba Band, which I realize she's been carrying with her for 50 years and telling thousands of people over the course of her lifetime that her dad toured with the Baja Marimba Band. So I'm at a weird crossroads. Do I talk her out of this?

[Drew Lynch]

I mean, and you gotta tell her that he's dead. Mine just passed away in November. Moment of silence.

[Adam Carolla]

Sorry to hear him.

[Drew Lynch]

Moment of silence.

[Dawson]

Mmm.

[Drew Lynch]

He never played trumpet. I'm trying to just do it since Mike's not gonna.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, if you could do Taps. If you could do Taps.

[Drew Lynch]

He died. Oh.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh. Oh. Oh. Riley Auto Parts. Yeah, they're in the business of keeping your car on the road and there are not many car issues I can't figure out. But if I'm stumped, I'll call O'Reilly immediately. They've got thousands of parts in stock either in store or online, so you never have to worry if you, if you're in a jam. They also test your battery for free. If it needs to be replaced, they will help you find the right one because there's not just one. There used to be just like one or two batteries. Now every car's got its own size. So whether you're a car aficionado or an auto novice, you're going to see the employees at O'Reilly Auto Parts are helpful and they're friendly. O'Reilly is your one stop shop for all things auto. Do it yourself. It's O'Reilly, right? Dawson?

[Dawson]

Stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or visit us@O'ReillyAuto.com Adam that's O'ReillyAuto.com Adam.

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[Adam Carolla]

My name is Mackenzie and I started a GoFundMe for the adoptive mother of a nonverbal autistic child. The mother had lost her job because she wasn't able to find adequate care for this autistic child. So she really needed some help with living expenses, paying some back bills. So I launched a GoFundMe to help support them during this crisis. And we raised about $10,000 within just a couple of months. I think that the surprising thing was by telling a clear story and just like really being very clear about what we needed, we had some really generous donations from people who were really moved by the situation that this family was struggling with.

[Drew Lynch]

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[Adam Carolla]

So what do we. What do we do?

[Drew Lynch]

So the predicament that you're in, I think you gotta. I think you gotta. I think you had. Or is there any video evidence that he ever played like. That he played and you're like, he's got. We've got it on. We've got it on camera with the Baja marimba bag. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. No, there is no. There's no photographs. There's no video evidence. There are no postcards from the road.

[Dawson]

See, what you gotta do with your sister is. It's the opposite of your favorite movie. It's prosecuting your life. You just got to cut them down. There's no evidence. This never happened. But the problem is.

[Adam Carolla]

Scrub it.

[Dawson]

If you. If you let her live with this information much longer, maybe her kids will think that they're like Cherokee Indian because it's family.

[Drew Lynch]

It's true. One degree away from Cherokee Indian.

[Dawson]

No, there's. Yeah, there's a Elizabeth Warren Slippery slope to running water. Yep.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I said, you know, I don't think he's ever toured with the Baja Marimba band.

[Drew Lynch]

How vehement is she on this? Is she like. I know it for a fact. I have a tattoo.

[Adam Carolla]

Here's the thing about women.

[Drew Lynch]

I don't know much clitor. Say it either way, Claris.

[Adam Carolla]

Either way, Cletus. Women know actual events pretty well, but they know made up events better. That's basically what I've. That's my interaction with them. They know shit. They're more positive of shit that didn't happen. Well, here's the thing. They don't know anything about World War II that happened, but they know a bunch of shit that happened in modern times that didn't happen.

[Drew Lynch]

Kind of a genius way of operating

[Adam Carolla]

it is a good way to go

[Drew Lynch]

through, you know, if you create an, if you have an NFT that you're just thriving in. Right, Right. I mean, who's gonna ref that?

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Drew Lynch]

Right. It's like, it's like, I don't pay for coffee because I tell people I have bitcoin.

[Adam Carolla]

And also, there is nobody you're ever going to run into who, when you go, my dad toured with the Baja Marimba Band. They go, bullshit. My dad played percussion for that band and I know every member.

[Dawson]

They're just going to Sito Sanchez, right?

[Adam Carolla]

They're just going to go, good for you.

[Drew Lynch]

No one's going to refute that right. At all.

[Adam Carolla]

I think. Well, nobody except for you.

[Dawson]

All you really have to say is you, you know, your sister left at a younger age than you. And you're like, dad was there. He never left the house. There was no tour.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, she had an argument. She had an argument. My dad changed his look when he got divorced from my mom.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, nice.

[Adam Carolla]

From sort of button down guy to groovy 70s hipster guy. So she said he went away on tour and came back looking like a hippie with a beard and a dashiki and, you know, a fro out to here. And I was like, well, how long was he gone? And then wouldn't we have known he was gone? But I have a couple of pieces, I have a couple of pieces of argument here. Evidence.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, I'm so excited.

[Adam Carolla]

One is, if you go on tour with a really popular band, you get fucking paid. Where was the money? There was never. My dad never had a penny. So wouldn't it stand to reason that if you went on tour with a super popular band that you would actually get paid to go on tour with this popular band and then come back with money?

[Drew Lynch]

Especially on the roster as a trumpet player, it's lead singer, trumpet, marimbas, Everyone

[Adam Carolla]

else, the band I look had one trumpet player. They had like marimbas, trombone, you know, percussion. They had one trumpet player. Now we heard my dad playing the trumpet. I don't think that would be him. So a couple things. Then it got a little difficult, you know, because the harsh reality was setting in.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, for her.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Now she did offer up a pretty compelling argument. I said, I don't think he's Ever been out on the road? That was my dad after he grew his hair out and had a beard.

[Drew Lynch]

So this is when he came back with the look.

[Adam Carolla]

He came back with the look. According to her, he went down to

[Dawson]

the crossroads is what he did.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. So I said to my sister, I said, I don't think my dad ever went out on tour with the Baja Marimba band. And she said, remember that time we picked him up from the airport? Ooh, sounds good. Except for case, fully less than 40% of people are at airports.

[Drew Lynch]

I think you're kind of underestimated. So many people at the airport.

[Adam Carolla]

Not everybody are in the Bahama band.

[Drew Lynch]

I literally was at a layover with a whole plane of Baha marambas, okay?

[Adam Carolla]

They wouldn't let me on, right?

[Drew Lynch]

They wouldn't scan my boarding pass. They were like, you're not in this band.

[Adam Carolla]

You're not in the band. So I said, that's why I always

[Dawson]

pack maracas in my carry on.

[Drew Lynch]

I'm telling you, there's turbulence. I hear it shaking up there.

[Dawson]

It's frustrating.

[Adam Carolla]

We did pick him up from the airport one time. He's coming home from Philadelphia where he used to live. But also, where was the rest of the band? Where are the postcards from the road? Where are all the pictures? But here's the biggest piece of evidence ever. I said, look, all dad liked to do for the last 50 years of his life is sit around and tell trumpet hero stories. Like, I was in the Catskills and Guy Lombardo. I saw him in the air some the elevator, and he gave me a thumbs up or something. I said, In 50 years, have you ever heard one Baja Marimba on the road story? And she goes, never. And I said, well, there you go. He would have to tell you stories.

[Dawson]

That is solid evidence. I would submit this as further evidence.

[Adam Carolla]

I did unfortunately have to share my conclusion that the guy who formed the Baja Marimba band was best friends with Herb Alpert. Herb Alpert's one of the best trumpet players on the planet. And do you think that guy would think our dad was a good enough trumpet player to go on tour?

[Drew Lynch]

Loose lips sink ships.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. So then, round number two, okay? Mom was friends with Carol Burnett.

[Drew Lynch]

See this one I can get a little closer to. I feel like this is more realistic for me to. If you were to say either one of these at the party, I would be like, oh, she for sure. They probably went to. They probably had brunch. They probably book club. Her and Carol Burnett.

[Adam Carolla]

And I also found something your mom started.

[Dawson]

She probably started that rumor.

[Adam Carolla]

I also found out that her and I had. My sister and myself had been to Herb Alpert's home.

[Dawson]

Holy shit. For a barbecue or something, right?

[Adam Carolla]

So that was the Baja Marimba guy's house. And then she goes, remember we went to his music room and he had this big xylophone? And I said, I. That's a marimba. And she goes, oh. And I go, that's because we were in the Baja marimba guys music room, not Herb Albert's music room. But anyway, so there's a lot of disappointment going down with my sister. So then the Carol Burnett story, which is a story that's been bandied about the family a little bit now, it is true that my mother went to Hollywood High and that Carol Burnett went to Hollywood High. Oop.

[Drew Lynch]

I need to hear no more.

[Adam Carolla]

You've got all the evidence you need.

[Drew Lynch]

Conclusive, dude.

[Adam Carolla]

If you look up.

[Drew Lynch]

Jury deliberates for less than 10 minutes.

[Adam Carolla]

Carol Burnett, Hollywood High. I would bet you that Carol Burnett graduated from Hollywood High in 1951. 1950 or 1951. So I'm pretty sure that Carol Burnett, who's still alive.

[Drew Lynch]

Is she?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Drew Lynch]

Holy cow.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. As far as I know, still alive. Graduated Hollywood High at the same year my mother graduated Hollywood High.

[Drew Lynch]

Best friends. Best friends. Algebra three. Algebra. How many? Calculus.

[Adam Carolla]

Carol Burnett graduated in 1951. All right, so I did that math because they were born in 33. They're both born the same year.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, okay. I didn't know this.

[Adam Carolla]

And they graduated the same year. But the best of my knowledge, they never saw each other again. Now, basically, my contention is, if mom was friends with Carol Burnett, how come I've never seen Carol Burnett? I've never been to, like, let's say I have kids. I have friends. My kids know my friends because they come over and they go out to dinner and they come watch the game, and they're around. I've never seen Carol Burnett in person, but I questioned my sister on it. She said that one time, many years later, my mom and stepdad were in Hawaii and ran into Carol Burnett. And Carol Burnett recognized my mom and said something. Oh, that's the story. Oh. But you know what? You know what I realized, Drew?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

When you come from a family who's had almost zero accomplishments, you hang your hat on anything.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, absolutely.

[Adam Carolla]

We literally, my sister, no one knew Carol Burnett. We never got any money from Carol Burnett. We never worked with Carol Burnett. It's not like my mom was her hairstylist. We did nothing. There was no benefit from Carol Burnett. But because we had nothing to brag about or be proud about, my mom going to high school with Carol Burnett was. That's all we had. And my dad not touring with the Baja Marimba Band. Those were our claims to fame.

[Drew Lynch]

Someone's family is like, my daughter is Carol Burnett. And that's their accomplishment.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? Yeah. Well, Chris, Carolla, to the best of my knowledge, never. Never knew Carol Burnett. But they graduated high school at the same time.

[Drew Lynch]

The same high school, the same year, and then later in Hawaii. Hey, good to see you.

[Adam Carolla]

I have no.

[Drew Lynch]

Remember graduation.

[Adam Carolla]

Come on over. We just put a pig in the ground.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Rudy Pavage]

I don't.

[Adam Carolla]

Did Carol Burnett ever live in Hawaii? Because that was then my sister's contention.

[Drew Lynch]

They vacationed together.

[Adam Carolla]

I felt.

[Drew Lynch]

Girls trip.

[Adam Carolla]

I felt mixed about trying to talk my sister out of all this stuff.

[Drew Lynch]

Well, I think there's some concessions that can be made on both sides. Right?

[Adam Carolla]

Really? Okay.

[Drew Lynch]

You know, you say to her, they were best friends, and she says to you and dad didn't tour. Right? Or no, you said you weren't. Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Carol Burnett lived in Hawaii.

[Drew Lynch]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

Maintaining a home in Maui.

[Drew Lynch]

Are you kidding me?

[Adam Carolla]

Since the early 80s.

[Drew Lynch]

This.

[Adam Carolla]

Is this gonna go in my sister's column?

[Drew Lynch]

There's a paper that's a win. Yeah. I'm kind of on her side. And honestly, you kind of lost a little bit of credibility with the Baja Rumba thing.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm. Marimba. But yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, sorry, Not Roomba. But, you know, because she might be right about everything that she's ever said.

[Adam Carolla]

It's possible.

[Drew Lynch]

Based on everything that I've learned about her, her relationship to her mom. Your mom and Carol Burnett. Your sister might know so many more people.

[Adam Carolla]

It's possible.

[Drew Lynch]

So many famous people, too.

[Adam Carolla]

She also told me that my mom worked at Herb Alpert's wife's dress shop.

[Drew Lynch]

That is almost a flex. I don't even know if we say that. Do we tell people that?

[Dawson]

You do.

[Adam Carolla]

I did ask, was it full time because mom never left the house. So maybe she did it remotely or something. I don't know.

[Drew Lynch]

Say this again. Say this again. It is the mom's Herb Alpert.

[Adam Carolla]

Herb Alpert's wife's wife had a dress shop.

[Drew Lynch]

And who did what there?

[Adam Carolla]

My mom worked there. Ooh. Yeah. Except for my mom, Carol Burnett.

[Drew Lynch]

She came in all the time.

[Adam Carolla]

Come on.

[Dawson]

More pants.

[Adam Carolla]

My mom didn't leave the house, so I don't know how she did. So I inquired. I said full Time? She said, no, part time.

[Drew Lynch]

Your sister might have Alzheimer's.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, she was hit with a softball, actually, couple years back.

[Drew Lynch]

What won't a softball get you into?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, man. A guy from the Glendale Fire Department just hit a frozen rope.

[Drew Lynch]

They're on a tear. Those guys did, dude. They're relentless.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, now we gotta look and see if Herb Alpert's wife had a dress shot so she could be right. I felt bad trying to talk her out of it. You guys tell me what you think of this. She laughed. At a certain point she said, well, maybe I'm kind of an up rounder. Like, maybe I just go positive. And then she said, better than being a down rounder. Cause my family were all down rounders, you know?

[Drew Lynch]

I see.

[Adam Carolla]

And I said. And she goes, what's wrong with up round? I said, how about we just go down the middle? Which would be accurate.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, that's.

[Adam Carolla]

How about just going for accurate?

[Drew Lynch]

Find the truth.

[Adam Carolla]

We don't have to go round down or round up. We'll just go right where the truth lies.

[Drew Lynch]

Round, straight.

[Adam Carolla]

Based on available search There is no indication that Herb Alpert's wife, vocalist Lanny hall, married 1973 to present Ooh.

[Drew Lynch]

Til right now. Keep it going, Lonnie.

[Adam Carolla]

Or his first wife, Sharon May Lubin, owned a dress shop.

[Drew Lynch]

Geez, you're gonna marry two people and neither one of them has a dress shop.

[Adam Carolla]

What are you doing, by the way? If you're the first wife, right?

[Drew Lynch]

I am.

[Adam Carolla]

And you get divorced from Herb Alpert, you gotta. Anyone who gets divorced goes, look, look, good luck to the next person that marries this guy, because you cannot be in the same house. This guy's been married for 53 years to the same woman.

[Dawson]

He ain't letting go of that Tijuana brass.

[Adam Carolla]

That's on the first wife, and she's still alive. I Hope she was 20 years younger, because Herb Alpert is like, 99.

[Drew Lynch]

Wow. One more.

[Adam Carolla]

Should I contact my sister and explain that the wife never had a dress shop?

[Drew Lynch]

Absolutely. Send her a screenshot of the article. Guess what I found at work today. Guess what I found at work today. When the facility lets you out for a walk, when you go back in, check your email.

[Adam Carolla]

Check your email. That's right. Yeah. So it was, you know, I wouldn't call it uncomfortable, but it was interesting.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, and then I. But I started thinking about recollections, and then I. That's. That's going back to the 70s. And I started thinking going back to olden times, you know, I mean, Joan of Arc, you know, whatever. Really? I have no fucking idea if anybody did anything. Whatever the Billy the Kid or Pecos Bob or whatever. All the stories of yore. No. Should we believe any of them? Yeah, because they're all fucked up.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. It's like that. It's like the Mandela effect. This is exactly that.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. You know, well, my sister said my mom was best friends with Nelson Mandela, by the way.

[Drew Lynch]

Seriously?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

Him and Carol.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right.

[Drew Lynch]

Nelson and Carol. Both in Hawaii, Right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yep.

[Drew Lynch]

I think Nelson graduated from Hollywood High.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Make sure Carol Burnett graduated. I know she graduated, because if you go by Hollywood High, there's a big mural on the side, and it has the famous alumni.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, nice.

[Adam Carolla]

And it's got, like, John Ritter is on there and Carol Burnett's on there, and there's a couple different notable people. Cause you'd have. Hollywood High would have to shit out some celebrities. It just makes sense, Right?

[Drew Lynch]

By proxy, you would hope.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I mean, I went to North Hollywood High, so we're kind of. You know, we got reality stars.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

We can get big celebrities.

[Drew Lynch]

That's close. That's the next best thing. Mm.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. So does your family have any lore?

[Drew Lynch]

Let's see.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, what's the most famous? Like, your dad fixed Engelbert Humperdinck's heat pump.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

It's like something like that. Something good.

[Drew Lynch]

Okay. Wayne. Wayne. Wayne Newton. Wayne Newton. He lives in Vegas.

[Adam Carolla]

That's good.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. So he. One. So Wayne Newton lives in a. Or lives in a huge house in Vegas. I don't know if he still does.

[Adam Carolla]

This makes sense.

[Drew Lynch]

And my dad's air conditioning company worked on a unit that was in that neighborhood.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. Wow. Yep. That is.

[Drew Lynch]

I didn't want to bust that out early on. Is that a show?

[Adam Carolla]

Is my dad not touring with a famous band?

[Drew Lynch]

I think they're identical. Yep.

[Adam Carolla]

By the way, as long as you're not gonna tour the band, why don't we just make it Led Zeppelin or the Beatles or something? Just go.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, change it.

[Adam Carolla]

So your dad replaced a condenser somewhere in the Henderson neighborhood where Wayne Newton lives.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. Technically, the zip code was bifurcated and through that neighborhood. So it's not the same zip code. But that's just because, like, it's not. One of the houses is just Wayne's is so big that a part of it is not that same zip code. So it's technically in different parts of Vegas.

[Adam Carolla]

My family's claim to fame. This is Not a good sign, by the way, if your family's claim to fame is knowing success, knowing people that like my. So we had the Baja Marimba Band. Like, know that guy? Carol Burnett? Know that guy. And then we just have a lot of, like, Jules Mandel is an architect. Or Trudy Mandel teaches at ucla. Like, I got a lot of that. I'm like, yeah, none of us do any shit. You know people that do stuff.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, my aunt was.

[Adam Carolla]

And by the way, not invented the atomic bomb or anything, just pretty much works at ucla. Like, that was a big if, so. And so was an architect or a doctor. Oh, Emery Kenneric is an architect. Okay. Big deal. There's fucking 5, 500 Armenian guys in Glendale that are fucking architects.

[Dawson]

I got two of those. One right along the lines. My great Uncle Frank owned the Monterey Tin Cannery where Cannery Row was written about.

[Adam Carolla]

That's something. We had a distant relative that was in Philadelphia and in the mob. That was a claim to fame. Yeah, Carol. Someone knew. Someone went to high school with Carol Burnett that then never saw her again at 17 and a half, I think

[Drew Lynch]

having people in the mob, that's so cool.

[Adam Carolla]

What do you got? Any. Any family lore? And my grandmother knew a gay activist from, like the 40s.

[Dawson]

Ooh, describe that guy.

[Adam Carolla]

That was probably the first one. Yeah, Harry. Harry Hay. That was her big. So her big deal was knowing a homo from 1949. That was a big deal.

[Drew Lynch]

That's my Twitter bio. Let's see. I have an aunt who was like, I could have gone on a date with Bill Cower, the head coach of the Steelers. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So you had an aunt that could have gone on a date with Bill Cower?

[Drew Lynch]

I had an aunt who coulda. Oh, I had an aunt who coulda.

[Adam Carolla]

My sister went to a supermarket in Encino with my mom when she was nine and saw Michael Jackson at the supermarket. But my mom says she doesn't remember it. Cause my mom is a down rounder. But so we don't know. And now with the whole Baja Marimba story, everything's brought into question.

[Drew Lynch]

My first week I moved to la. I was driving in Valley Village, and there was one of those filming trucks. They're not marked, and they're like, oh, this is a set truck. Who knows what's in there? There's crafty or there's ladders. Who knows? And I saw a guy that was parked right behind it, and he got out of his car and then he shut it. And I was passing right by it, and I Am so confident that it was Liev Schreiber.

[Adam Carolla]

Liev Schreiber.

[Drew Lynch]

So.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh my God. See, my family would have made a meal out of that one.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, yeah, let's see. Look at that. We went on a drive with Liev Schreiber. You know, it kind of changes, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

Lev Schreiber, he was, he drove my, you know, he drove us to lunch and then. Changes.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

So Michael Jackson in Encino, at a store in Encino supermarket. You think Michael Jackson shops his own produce?

[Adam Carolla]

My.

[Drew Lynch]

Not a euphemism. You think he

[Adam Carolla]

lived in Encino. So there's that. Carol Burnett lived in Hawaii.

[Drew Lynch]

So your family has so much credibility.

[Adam Carolla]

You have to kind of think of it this way. I hate to put it this way, but if you're Carol Burnett.

[Drew Lynch]

I am.

[Adam Carolla]

My mom would be the last person you would ever want to hang out with. Like just the least funny, least interesting, least dynamic. Like there's no. Why would you want to hang out with my mom if you're Carol Burnett? That would be the worst afternoon of your.

[Drew Lynch]

I don't know. Your mom, she seems nice. So I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, my sister told the Michael Jackson story, but my mom said she didn't remember and my mom was there. So. By the way, the worst thing you can do to your story is if I go. Me and Dawson were out to lunch and I saw Sylvester Stallone and he spotted me across the table and he gave me one of these. He gave me a big thumbs up. Remember that, Dawson? And Dawson goes, nah, I don't remember that. That kind of fucks my story up. You know what I'm saying?

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

In 03, Michael Jackson arranged for a Florida public supermarket to close so he could experience shopping like a normal person.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, that's so cool.

[Adam Carolla]

Isn't that great?

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, just like shutting it down. Pay to shut it down.

[Dawson]

You know, Listen to Warren Zevon song. Michael Jackson at Disneyland. He had that shut down too.

[Drew Lynch]

So easy to moonwalk in those. In how slippery those floors are.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

So much fun.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

I'd go socks, man. I'd go socks, socks the whole way.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, run it. Run at the end of the. Run towards the end of the aisle and then you stop and you just kind of slide all the way to

[Adam Carolla]

the New Ocean Tasty business. All the way.

[Dawson]

Grab a loaf of bread on the way and throw it in the cart.

[Drew Lynch]

So much fun.

[Adam Carolla]

You'd have to grab a handful of yogurt covered raisins from the bin and just nibble on Them as you walk, just defying anybody to stop you. You know what I mean?

[Drew Lynch]

I dare you. I bought this store a few minutes ago.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right.

[Drew Lynch]

Tell me if this isn't mine.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

How do you rent out a grocery store? Do you pay what it would cost to be the money that you would make during that time? How does that work?

[Adam Carolla]

I think it turns out if you have enough money, you can get JLO just to come to your house and watch the super bowl with you. Like, if you have enough money, you could just do whatever you. You want. Within reason.

[Drew Lynch]

I mean, my cousin watched the super bowl with J. Lo one time.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a good family story.

[Drew Lynch]

And it's true because J. Lo. Because my family had a TV and JLo. JLo's on TV.

[Adam Carolla]

And so they saw her on the TV, but they would count that as watching it with.

[Drew Lynch]

Oh, I guess. So I'm now putting that together.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. So somebody sold Ken Stabler a Porsche. It is sad, the meager existence of celebrities. Yeah. I had Robert Urich live somewhere in my neighborhood. We had that going.

[Dawson]

I mowed. I got my first job, landscape maintenance. Which gardener? 12 years old. I had to work 40 hours a week. I mowed Bob Jimenez's lawn, and he was a news guy on Channel 5 in San Francisco.

[Adam Carolla]

Ooh.

[Drew Lynch]

We didn't. Wow. We found the top, didn't we? We didn't think we would. I mean, I didn't know that we're going. It's gonna be tough to follow any of this. We mowed his lawn. San Francisco.

[Adam Carolla]

We had. Look up Joan Van Arc, her husband. You rarely see a blonde dude with a full frozen. But her husband, Marshall was his last name, was a news anchor locally, and he had a full blonde fro.

[Drew Lynch]

Are you kidding me?

[Adam Carolla]

You tell me if I'm making this up.

[Drew Lynch]

Holy cow.

[Adam Carolla]

And Joan Van Arc and this guy live somewhere in my neighborhood, and he jogged a lot, so I don't want to be a 1 upper, but I did see him jogging. Oof.

[Dawson]

Well, I dated a girl once who dated Jeff Garcia from the 49ers before me.

[Drew Lynch]

That is so cool. Wow.

[Adam Carolla]

You must have been quite a letdown.

[Dawson]

I was.

[Adam Carolla]

That guy was super mobile.

[Dawson]

That was. No, he wasn't. I hated him.

[Adam Carolla]

He was mobile. What are you talking about?

[Drew Lynch]

That's gotta be tough.

[Adam Carolla]

He's a super mobile quarterback. I thought I. Garcia's a winner. Don't talk shit about Garcia.

[Drew Lynch]

Exactly.

[Adam Carolla]

He's an athlete. I mean, that was elusive.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, elusive is the exact word for it. Dating Somebody who dated someone more famous than you. That's got to be tough on any level, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Drew Lynch]

And you're well known for all your landscaping. But I would say, I would say the idea that, you know, that she just kind of one upped in that way.

[Adam Carolla]

Oof. That's tough.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah, that's tough. That's why I won't date anybody.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's true. Because it always ends in tragedy.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Unless you're Herb Alpert and you've been married to the Same woman since 1973. How old is Herb Alpert and his wife? That's the next question. All right, he's 90. Is she 82 or did he marry like he go all Epstein or something?

[Drew Lynch]

We thought Herb was 99.

[Adam Carolla]

I thought he was. Well, he's been. He started. He must have started A and M records when he was 27 or something like that. Guy's been wildly successful.

[Drew Lynch]

A and M cassettes.

[Adam Carolla]

She is 80. All right. Drew lynch, the stuttering comedian on YouTube. It's very funny. Stand up special. And where do we go to find your dates? Drew?

[Drew Lynch]

Drew lynch.com.

[Adam Carolla]

we will take a break. We'll come back with Rudy in the news right after this. Oh, trying to run a small business in this state especially, I mean it is all the deck is stacked against you. Am I right, Dawson?

[Dawson]

Absolutely. We talk about it all the time. We run a small business here and it's tough these days for small businesses to make bankroll every week. But our friends at Cardiff can help you because they built their entire business on helping your business. They got fast funding and same day rates you'll find at a bank but no red tape and all the bureaucracy that we have here in the state of California.

[Adam Carolla]

True, They've funded over 12 billion for business owners since 2004. You can apply in five minutes, get approved and funded as fast as well today. If you've been in business for at least a year and are doing 20,000 in monthly revenue, you could qualify for up to 500,000. Zero impact on your personal credit to apply.

[Dawson]

That's right. Stop letting the big banks slow your growth. Go to Cardiff co. Adam, that's Cardiff. C a r d I f f co 80am Cardiff borrow better at Marathon gas stations.

[Adam Carolla]

Every stop is the start of fun. Like the awesome fuel savings you're going to get with Marathon Rewards. Join Marathon Rewards today and start earning rewards on every gallon of gas. You can redeem rewards at any time, saving up to $1 per gallon. Well, that adds up. And don't forget marathon stations are packed. Packed with all the conveniences you need to stock up on to live life on the Go Marathon where the fun runs on full Available at participating marathon locations. Terms and conditions apply. See marathonrewards.com for details.

[Dawson]

You're invited to a special audience screening of the world famous KROC doc.

[Adam Carolla]

We were the first to play d biggest bands in the history of music

[Dawson]

with producer Adam Carolla.

[Adam Carolla]

I made the KROQ documentary because I kept running into people who had their own stories about K rock and their memories of K rock.

[Dawson]

Featuring no Doubt, Green Day, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Blink 182, Depeche Mode, the Cure, U2.

[Adam Carolla]

Los Angeles has a musical punch.

[Rudy Pavage]

That fist has KROQ on it. Krock is where everything happens.

[Drew Lynch]

We started broadcasting September 2nd of 1972.

[Adam Carolla]

We didn't have any listeners.

[Dawson]

The world famous Kroc Dock.

[Adam Carolla]

It captures a time that will never exist again.

[Dawson]

Saturday June 20th at 8pm [e-mail] all right.

[Adam Carolla]

Looking forward to that.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah baby.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

That's awesome. It's going to be great.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah. Going to see Speaking of no doubt in that promo, going to see him tonight at the Sphere.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh really?

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Nice.

[Rudy Pavage]

Can't wait.

[Adam Carolla]

And speaking of Bono, it's funny, I forgot Bono is in the doc. Bono. I just like the tweet he said which is I want everyone to understand this. Nobody is against feeding the world's hungry and the children. We're against giving you money to do it and it not going to the kids. It's not. We're against the kids. We're not against the leering center. We're not against help for hospice and end of life care. No one is against any of that. That's why we pay our taxes and that's why we donate. I was a Catholic, big brother. I donated my time, I got my kid, I took my kid out, I molested him and I returned him.

[Rudy Pavage]

Like one does.

[Adam Carolla]

Of course.

[Rudy Pavage]

Just like a great catholic you are.

[Adam Carolla]

Y I didn't donate my time and then help fat rich kids. I had a kid with a wandering eye who didn't know his dad. His dad lived in Kenya. White guy. What? White guy. Wow. Who are the chances that I get a Catholic little brother? He's a red haired kid. His dad's in Kenya and his dad's white.

[Rudy Pavage]

Worst marathon runner ever.

[Adam Carolla]

So I was fine donating my time to him and buying him Taco Bell. But it went to him. And nobody doesn't want to feed the hungry or the kids or take Care of the kids that are on the spectrum with all the disorders, or have the concert for the people from the Palisades where they rebuild their homes. Everybody wants that. What we don't want is the money going to people that then buy Lamborghinis and fund their wars. That's it. What are we arguing about? Why is it always turned back to, you don't want usaid? You're against kid. No, no. We're against giving warlords money to the shit Never gets to the people. Let me give you a for instance. Everybody dig this. Dawson, dig.

[Dawson]

Yo.

[Adam Carolla]

We are in Los Angeles, California. It is 2026. It is a fundraiser in California in the United States with a bunch of white people and no doubt the whitest band ever and many other bands all coming together to raise money for other educated white people who live in modern times, the United States and California. And all of that money gets fucking drained off to NGOs. What do you think's going on in Somalia? What do you think's going on with them in charge? What do you think's going on with all the trucks of grain that are going to the hungry kids? We can't pull this shit off in modern times in the middle of fucking Los Angeles with the most progressive and the most college degrees per capita anywhere in the world, and we're still grifting and funneling the fucking money off to the NGOs that are buying the Lamborghinis. So what do you think's going on abroad?

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, they need the Baha Marimba band to play those benefits. Not no Doubt Jesus Christ. Go to the right. Right place.

[Adam Carolla]

Bono said what? Sorry, Dawson. If you. If you got it there.

[Dawson]

Bono on what he has learned as an activist. I thought that if we just redistributed resources, then we could solve every problem. I now know that's not true. The off ramp out of extreme poverty is commerce. It's entrepreneurial.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, no, sorry, it's. It's not. Yeah.

[Dawson]

No. He's saying it with disgust.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm sorry. Let me do that again.

[Dawson]

Let me do that. Read that again. The off ramp of extreme out of extreme poverty is commerce. It's entrepreneurial capitalism.

[Adam Carolla]

I know all the stuff you hate that works. I don't, by the way. Fuck off. Like, I hate the gross. You hate the only thing that works. Sorry. That's on you.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, if you listen to most people, hey, man, Bezos and Elon, if they just got together, it would all be solved. Just take your billions of dollars and give it to people that Just shit.

[Adam Carolla]

Give all your money. Look, we raised $100 million. We did it 10 minutes ago in the middle of the safest, whitest, most advanced civilization in the world. And we still grifted and grafted and stole all the money. So you tell me how this is going to work in a third world nation with where all government is corrupt.

[Dawson]

I think U2 needs to tour again. And during this tour, Bono needs to prosthesize on the microphone in between every song about how what he said was all wrong and start promoting capitalism.

[Adam Carolla]

And we could get Bruce Springsteen to open for him going, I was wrong about Trump. Two, three, four. He's ended nine more. Two, three.

[Rudy Pavage]

You know what? I don't give a shit. I'm still going to see no Doubt, okay? I don't care where my money is going. I paid good money. My, my.

[Dawson]

That's capitalism.

[Rudy Pavage]

My cousin paid good money for those tickets.

[Adam Carolla]

So weird. They're a weird band. I got bad news.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, no, they are strange.

[Adam Carolla]

Absolutely everyone in the band is fucked up and weird.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, for sure.

[Adam Carolla]

Except for one guy.

[Rudy Pavage]

Which one? I'm gonna guess not. I guess.

[Adam Carolla]

I think the guitar players normal. The rest of them are fucking. Something wrong with. There's like something wrong with their assholes. Kind of the whole band. It's weird.

[Rudy Pavage]

Anyway, yeah, do some news.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, hold on. Guitar. Ah, shit. I think it's a guitar player. That's normal.

[Dawson]

I was gonna say you locked yourself in there. You had and out. If you just left it at. Except for one of them.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, because then they could all be wondering. Except for one of them.

[Rudy Pavage]

Sorry I pimped you on that. That's my. I shouldn't have done. That's bad improv. I'm sorry.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you see The Hulk Hogan 4 parter on Netflix?

[Rudy Pavage]

Loved it. Every minute of it.

[Dawson]

Loved it.

[Adam Carolla]

Jesus Christ. Then they got to the part where he's getting divorced and we have divorce laws that are like, hey, if the bitch who didn't work the whole time wants to just ruin your life and bankrupt you after your fifth back surgery, she can just go ahead and weaponize. You just go ahead and do that

[Rudy Pavage]

and then take your kick ass boat and put it in front of your apartment with her boy toy. That's why people get cannons. I was like, I totally get. If he shot through the middle of that boat and sunk it out in the middle of the ocean.

[Adam Carolla]

Should people get cannons? They should. You go, that's why people get cannons. Hey, man.

[Rudy Pavage]

And it's Hulk Hogan and John Popper. That's who needs cannons?

[Dawson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

John Popper has a cannon. John Popper could have fired a can of dog food because that's what he fires in his cannon because it fits perfectly into the barrel. Yeah, you just go, this guy worked his whole life, broke every spine, every vertebra on his back, had a thousand surgeries. And then this chick who never worked except for as a cocktail waitress just took him to the cleaners and destroyed his. Totally destroyed his life. It's so. It is so sad. I feel a lot of his pain. By the way, I've been approached to write a book. A divorce book.

[Rudy Pavage]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yes.

[Rudy Pavage]

So

[Adam Carolla]

the worm shall turn. Okay, yes, there will be tea spilled and I will then turn it around.

[Rudy Pavage]

This is called Hubby Stop talking. Yeah, A follow up to Daddy.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you get the story later on, but you don't get the story from the man's perspective very often. So I will definitely, definitely talk about it. And by the way, I don't know what their plan is. Their plan is guys get totally destroyed by women who don't feel like working, and then we're supposed to have some sort of quiet dignity and just go off into the sunset and pay for them for the rest of our lives. That's some bullshit right there. And by the way, like I said, if a male did that to a female, everyone would be outraged by it. At least Hulk cheated. At least he got to cheat. I didn't even get to cheat. I got fucked. Yeah, so I'll keep you guys posted on the book.

[Rudy Pavage]

And it's weird that they gave Linda Hogan top billing in this documentary, even though Hulk was married at the time of his death and his wife at the time is now wife, I guess, widow. She got what, maybe 15 minutes at the backside of that thing? Yeah, that's all she got. That was it.

[Adam Carolla]

She got part four. She got the last 10 minutes of part four.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah. I don't know. Maybe if Linda Hogan would stop putting her hand into old Hulk's pocket and let that woman speak a little bit. Also, I wonder where some of that money is going, because there's the Hulk. They have like a Hulk restaurant. They have a Hulk museum now.

[Adam Carolla]

Plus, he's got the laws just incentivize women to sue the shit out of guys and essentially take all the money they made while they literally. He literally broke his back in his career. And they just sit home and spend the fucking money. The law's on their side and the only thing preventing it is them having dignity. But they don't. None but they don't?

[Rudy Pavage]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

And now Hulk's gone. But I'll speak for him from the grave.

[Rudy Pavage]

I'm looking forward to it, man.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, what do you got?

[Rudy Pavage]

Well, speaking of having no dignity. Despite some hopeful pre Met Gala chat on social media urging celebrities to boycott this year's event. It's so ridiculous. Be it. As the Met Gala was sponsored by the world's third richest man, Amazon's Jeff Bezos, it seemed as though Sarah Paulson had something to say about it. If you notice, she has $1 bill that is a blindfold over her eyes. And when asked about it, she said that this is in retaliation for the 1%.

[Adam Carolla]

Where do we know Sarah Paulson from? I know the name, good actress.

[Rudy Pavage]

She did a thing called. I think it was called Ratchet. It was about Nurse Ratched from One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest. She also does a lot of independent films. Like Duplass. The Duplass brothers.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. One of those Duplass brothers turned out to be a huge pussy. Yeah. Cuz he went and sat down with Ben Shapiro and something, something, then he said Ben Shapiro's a good guy. And then his retarded left attacked him. And then he had to go out and apologize for saying something nice about Ben Shapiro. Which makes Mark Duplass a pussy. Yeah, a fucking sad pussy. And part of the problem as to why we got to where we got. Cause that was eight years ago. If he had fucking said fuck you woke Hollywood. I know you don't like the guy, but he was generous with me, so fuck off. But he can't do it because he's scared. Because he wants to work in this business. Now there is no business.

[Rudy Pavage]

Which is too bad because he makes great movies if he can separate the art from the man. I love his movies.

[Adam Carolla]

He's a nice guy. He just turned out to be a pussy. But anyway. I don't know if I would use the word great, but I used to talk to the Duplass brothers but then they got scared because they're pussies and they want to work in this industry.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And they're spared.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah. I like his movies. I think they are great. I know it's subjective, but I like it.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm not arguing with good. I'm only arguing with great.

[Rudy Pavage]

I do get a little loose lipped with the great. You're right. I definitely. He preys on people who have just accomplished something. Just cause you got it done doesn't mean that it's fantastic.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I mean they're good. They're like good indie, kind of low medium budgety films.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, she.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, you know, Tarantino makes great, great films.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah. But anyway, yeah, if that's the standard, then for sure. We wanted to show off a couple of the photos of dudes attending this year's Met Gala. And boy, did they not disappoint.

[Adam Carolla]

Who the fuck is that?

[Rudy Pavage]

I don't know what this is.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a conquistador kind of outfit. Yeah, let me explain. What.

[Dawson]

Yeah, what's the bullfighter? Matador.

[Adam Carolla]

Matador. Matador. Okay, let me tell you what's going on. Come on. I see these women. I'm gonna explain life and I'm going to explain why woman can never be president. You ready?

[Rudy Pavage]

I got a pen.

[Adam Carolla]

Let's go. No further than the Met Ball. Every single one of these women show up with these huge trains and they have five women behind them. And at some point, when the five nameless, faceless bitches get the train set just right, the person wearing the dress yells, now get the fuck out of the shot. This is about me, right? Women, we'll look at the next picture. By the way. Women walk around. Find me a big woman train picture. But the women walk around.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yes. Type in woman train.

[Adam Carolla]

Pulling that train. Women walk around with the train and they have all the other women running behind them and then skedaddling when the photographer comes up. That's their relationship. They like that relationship. With women, I would feel wildly uncomfortable with someone walking behind me. You know what I mean? Just moving my shit around. Men traditionally wore tails.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, the coattails.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Right? And guess what? I am going to carry you on my coattails. I'm going to take you with me on my coattails as a man. Rudy and Dawson. I'm wearing tails and you can ride my coattails. Not carry my coattails, not adjust my coattails. You may ride my coattails and we'll go right to the top. Women, you gotta move my train around and then get your fucking ass out of the way.

[Rudy Pavage]

The metaphor for life.

[Adam Carolla]

Love it. Women put. They subjugate other women, whereas men, I go, you can bump draft me by hanging onto my tails and ride my tails right to stardom and fame.

[Dawson]

Right?

[Rudy Pavage]

This is chapter one of the book. This is a good metaphor for divorce, too. That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so Rihanna. But I don't know if that's Rihanna. I can't. First off, I can't imagine something more uncomfortable than dragging shit. Like if I'm walking and my shoe comes untied and I take Three steps. I go, oh, God damn it. I don't go, oh, I'll do it at the mile marker. I got to fix it right now. I don't step on a shoelace.

[Dawson]

Yeah, they got to have a lot of square footage in this building, and I imagine that the seating options are either very extravagant or very limited.

[Adam Carolla]

I think they change. They, they. They. They cut the train loose. I think at some point, you'd have to. You have to. But the point is, is these poor people and gay guys have to run behind them and squire behind them. And it's not. I'm not making. I mean, I am making a joke, but I mean, it. It's like, look, back in the days, it's like, she's royalty. You are a lady in wait, or you are a squire or a serf, and you walk behind her, enabling her or helping her. You don't stand next to her with their arms folded. You walk behind. You can't walk in front with a train.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, they take this train, then they donate it to third world countries, so that's less. Rich kids can have beautiful trains.

[Adam Carolla]

And then there's Lena Dunham, who does make shitty movies. I don't know what she's doing. Like, I don't know what she's trying to accomplish. Well, here's what I'm saying. If you're Lena Dunham and you have sort of an angle in life, your angle is done. Hollywood, now I live in the wilds of Pennsylvania, a quiet and private life where I can focus on my art, my poetry, but you don't come back into Hollywood event and go, hey, I'm gonna try to look hot for five minutes and rub shoulders with a bunch of elitists, enrich people, and then go back to my quiet life of poetry and art. It's kind of a weird. You know what I mean? Why is she there?

[Rudy Pavage]

She showed up. She got exactly what she needed out of this business, and then she hightailed it off to another land where she doesn't have to deal with anymore.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, also, she's not funny. So we discovered she's not funny. Listen, I'll put together a list of people where I went not funny. You're not gonna hear about her in 10 years or whatever. People. People. I. I will.

[Dawson]

You early money.

[Adam Carolla]

You early money on the not funny.

[Dawson]

She also has one of those last names that indicates her status. She's.

[Adam Carolla]

She's done them. She's been there, and she's done them. So she should have a brother named Been there the Emphasis.

[Rudy Pavage]

Been there, been there, done him.

[Adam Carolla]

Been there, done him. You met my friend Guy. Dude. Bro.

[Rudy Pavage]

Related to Binder Dundat.

[Adam Carolla]

Shopify. Well, whenever I get nervous about an idea, that usually means it's going to be good. I can still remember how anxious I was before I started the podcast. Well, but why not bet on yourself? A lot of you people have great ideas and now's the time to go after it. But. But you're going to need the right tools. And that's where Shopify comes in. It's packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions and enhance your product photography. That's right, AI Photography. Shopify has the best converting checkout on the planet. They also have hundreds of ready to use templates for your design studio. Shopify helps you find your customers with easy to run email and social media campaigns. Trust me, you'll love having Shopify on your side. Am I right, Dawson?

[Dawson]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Dawson]

In a world where business owners everywhere are burning out.

[Adam Carolla]

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[Dawson]

And are losing their identities to AI.

[Adam Carolla]

Who even am I?

[Dawson]

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[Drew Lynch]

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[Dawson]

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[Adam Carolla]

yeah, so she looks horrible. It's also kind of a weird thing when you are a woman. I feel this way about super fat chicks who put a lot of time into their nails. I'm like, nothing's gonna. You're not gonna be. Hide behind those nails. You're a big fat chick and you're un. You're not attractive.

[Rudy Pavage]

She look.

[Dawson]

She looks like a coral reef.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, I was gonna say a used tampon. It's awful.

[Adam Carolla]

She later got ear fucked by clownfish. Yeah. Seriously, I don't know if you knew that? It's true. They ran a train.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, well, Nemo's dad's been lonely, okay? That's right. Marlon's been needing some loving.

[Adam Carolla]

Then there's this guy from the rivalry. What are the dudes doing at this place? I don't know. What the dudes. The straight. Oh, he's not straight.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, competing with the chicks is what they're doing.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Also, in a world. Here's what I never understand. In a world where we pretend to care about gas being 475A gallon and the poor children of Ukraine and Iran's using human shields, why do we do the super garish over the top flamboyant shit? Doesn't it feel a little weird? Like all we do is we talk about there's kids in this country and they go to bed hungry because they have food insecurity. And they live in a food desert, by the way. A food desert. That's food desert. When we write the history books, we'll go, what kind of bullshit made up fuck stick stuff that they came. Well, they came up with something called the School to prison pipeline. What was that? No, no one knows what it is and it never existed. And they made it up. And then at some point they got bored saying school to prison pipeline. So they came up with food desert. What does that mean? I don't know.

[Dawson]

School to Prison pipeline would be a great name for a water slide at Raging Waters.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

And food desert.

[Adam Carolla]

Black kids first in line.

[Dawson]

In any other reality, a food desert could be pretty sweet restaurant, dude.

[Adam Carolla]

The food desert.

[Dawson]

Ozzy would probably. Oswaldo would have eaten at the food desert. They would.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, Dawson, you've run out of. You've run out of ideas. You start off with a water slide idea.

[Rudy Pavage]

It's pretty good.

[Adam Carolla]

You're coasted to a stop. Come on, man. Who wants an iguana smoothie? All right, so now we have a food desert. Maybe we should take the food desert and combine it with the pipeline. And remove people from the food desert. Yeah, they got plenty of food in prison.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, I know California's in a drought, but this is a good way to water that desert up.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I love when they do that. And I love when Mondame, like they basically blame, you know, the supermarkets. The supermarkets move out of places. They get shoplifted and looted and stolen and enough fucking people rip em off and then they go, fuck it, we're moved. And that's where you get your food desert. It's not a problem with the markets, problem with the people who live there. So maybe start focusing on them instead of calling porn proud all the time.

[Rudy Pavage]

Well, speaking of children, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. Is targeting antidepressants, including popular medications like Zoloft and Prozac.

[Adam Carolla]

Good for him.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. United States does not just face a mental health crisis. We face a dependency crisis driven by over medicalization. The Data is clear. One in six American adults takes an antidepressant. One in ten children are on prescription medication for their mental health. 30% of college students report using psychiatric medications in the past year. And in nursing homes, more than half of the residents are on prescribed antidepressants. That's not a marginal issue. This is a system level pattern. Too many patients begin treatment without a clear understanding of the risks and how long they will stay on these drugs or how to come off of them. And that's not informed consent. Yeah, I know. He's a maniac because he wants to get everyone off the fucking pharmaceuticals, which is fucking everybody, everybody up. And I love the fact that he's enemy number one to the left, even though he's telling people to get their kids off the fucking pharmaceuticals that are scrambling their fucking brains. There is no goddamn way we're meant to be on all this shit. And in these numbers. That is insane. That one out of every six kids. And it's anecdotal, but, I mean, everybody I know has a fucking medicine cabinet just filled with shit that they don't need to be on.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah. And I'm glad that I grew up at that time. You and I both. It wasn't given out yet. It was like the generation of kids. Like I always say, I'm a Beavis and Butthead millennial, not a spongebob millennial. And it was the spongebob millennials that started with the Adderall and that type of. And it has just gone gangbusters.

[Adam Carolla]

Let me tell you something. I am older than you, and I thankfully missed out on antibiotics because antibiotics is what fucked everyone's gut up. So you guys think all this shit's some kind of medical miracle? You're fucking your kids up. So I missed out on antibiotics, and I don't have any gut problems or any issues that everybody else had. And I missed out on all the pharmaceuticals and the serotonin reuptake inhibitors. So my fucking brain's not scrambled either. So I don't know why you think all this stuff is good, kid. It ain't. And I do not trust the fucking doctors who make a living Putting you on this shit.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah. Did you ever break any bones as a child? Cause. Yeah. Cause my family, we were very adamant. Like, you only went to the doctor if you needed to go to the doctor. I mean, you had to have a

[Adam Carolla]

limb for a while. I didn't know what happened. You go to the emergency room and not the doctor? I don't know what the doctor was.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. And in my house, there was. Inside of my house that I grew up in, you would be hard pressed to find an aspirin. Wow. Like, I would say you would find inside of my mom's house or my dad's house, or like, even when they were remarried or in modern times, you would find. I don't think you'd find Mylanta or, you know, a Robitussin, a Nyquil. I don't. It didn't exist and it never existed for me. It was like, you know, you got a sore throat or a cough or whatever when I was adult, go to bed, suck it up.

[Rudy Pavage]

So you didn't take aspirin and yet are still autistic? How does that happen?

[Adam Carolla]

What?

[Rudy Pavage]

I don't get it.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, there would have been some aspirin probably. And if you had a problem, like, you know, upset stomach or something like that, someone may have gone out and got you some Emodium or something, or some Pepto something.

[Rudy Pavage]

The jingle wasn't out yet. Upset stomach, diarrhea.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, God. There was a. There was a. There was a thing in a weird gray bottle that tasted weird from the 70s.

[Rudy Pavage]

Like, Chalky, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, I know what you're talking about. I can't remember the name of it.

[Adam Carolla]

What was the gray bottle? 70s stomach. Upset stomach. Stuff had a weird. It was like a modium, but it was something not. We gotta look it up. But here's the whole. Here's the whole point. It wouldn't have been in the house. Someone would have gone and said, you got an upset stomach. I'll go get you some of this weird stuff and you can chug some of this and then go to bed. So there was no pills, zero pharmaceuticals. I'm picturing my dad and my mom in, like, the medicine cabinet. I don't think. We didn't have a medicine cabinet, but we had, like, a drawer or something in the bathroom. Bism. Pets, Mylanta.

[Rudy Pavage]

Oh, Mylanta.

[Dawson]

I don't.

[Adam Carolla]

Was it in it? Here's the thing. You're gonna know it by.

[Dawson]

Or Kaopectate.

[Adam Carolla]

No, Kaopectate made weird gray bottle. Like a non you know, now everything is bright green and has big letters on it. Like we're selling it to kids with learning disabilities or Mexicans or something. Back then it was just a gray bottle. Like, fuck you, Imodium Extreme. Yeah, like everything is fucking bright orange and translucent and clear. And it's like you. It's almost like they do it up like a drag boat or something that's supposed to attract young kids or something. This is like fucking gray bottle. Looked like army surplus shit. And it's like, fuck you. Your stomach hurts, you'll take this. And we're not giving it a happy name either. We're just gonna call it what it is.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, it's like that old can of beer that just said beer on it. That's how it was.

[Adam Carolla]

That's. My grandfather just drank. My grandfather drank generic beer. Like he wouldn't step up to a Lowen Brow or even a Budweiser.

[Rudy Pavage]

Couldn't get something with an animal on the side of the can like a 12 point buck.

[Adam Carolla]

My grandfather drank beer that said beer.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And could have gotten a Budweiser at that stage for probably between another $0.20 and maybe $0.39 price, you know, 1975 didn't squeeze the trigger.

[Rudy Pavage]

Well, obviously he built a mansion years later from all the money he spent.

[Adam Carolla]

All the same, he said of course he passed on the millions to me as well as the sports car collection. So I'm glad. The old man.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, you beer Nepo, baby.

[Adam Carolla]

No. He died. Yeah. He didn't leave anything. Oh, he had a large print dictionary. He'd had.

[Rudy Pavage]

Not bad.

[Adam Carolla]

Not too shabby.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

A dictionary that weighs 70 pounds. That's awesome. What was that? That stuff? 70. What are you typing in, Dawson?

[Dawson]

I typed in. I have to go back to the top. Liquid anti Diarrheal Medicine, 1970s. And it's mainly coming up with Imodium. Imodium was in a gross green bottle.

[Adam Carolla]

I need a gray bottle.

[Dawson]

It looks. It looks very much like that. I know what you're talking about.

[Adam Carolla]

Put in gray bottles, see what happens.

[Dawson]

I did find that there's an anti diarrhea called. Called Smecta.

[Adam Carolla]

I told you they didn't give happy names back then. Right? You know, it's good. Like Smuckers.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Hey, but, but Dawson don't do anti diarrhea. This was just stomach. This is upset stomach. Upset stomach. Liquid upset stomach. Yeah. Gray bottle. And I think that'll. That'll put it. I didn't say diarrhea. It's upset stomach. I think that was Kind of the. The reason anyway. Sorry, News. What do you got? Yes, he's right. Everyone is on too much shit. Knock it the fuck off. I'm telling you, you're poisoning your fucking brain, and I have no idea what we're doing. I know what they're doing. They want you to get five vaccines you don't need for a disease that's not gonna harm your healthy kid. That's what they want. You people have to wake the fuck up.

[Rudy Pavage]

You know what else I saw this weekend? It's making a comeback. Saw two of them this weekend in Philadelphia. Helmet. Baby helmets on the way back.

[Adam Carolla]

The corrective helmet, not the protective helmet.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, you're right. Yeah. It's not like Evil Knievel. You're not putting on a baby. Yeah, the corrective. Because they tell you that baby skulls are all messed up, and that's not the case.

[Adam Carolla]

Every. Nobody has a perfectly shaped skull. Except for Caillou. Caillou, like a regulation basketball, is, like, perfect. There's no deviation. Caillou's head is perfect. Other than that, we're human and things are a little bit different. And so they can say, if you want to play it safe, you'll get the helmet. And they're not lying, but they are lying, and they are taking your money, but they're not technically lying.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, well, the reason why baby skulls are soft like that is to be able to get out of the birth canal so it comes out. Your head's all wonky, so you can fit.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm going Kaopectate.

[Dawson]

Kaopectate is on there, but I'm not seeing it in a gray bottle. I'm reminded of Gaviscon, though. Heartburn.

[Adam Carolla]

I didn't even know what gav. Show me Kaopectate and let me see if it reminds me, like, 70s bottle of Kaopectate.

[Dawson]

Mylanta was in a light bluish bottle, but consistently, all that's coming up is Pepto, Mylanta, Maalox, Kaopectate.

[Adam Carolla]

Show me old school Kaopectate. But that. That's. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sorry, but, Dawson, if Rudy. Half the label's gray, it's a huge pinch of gray. That's his search. Oh, okay.

[Dawson]

He searched Kaopectate.

[Adam Carolla]

All right.

[Dawson]

But there's a. I search searched for a gray bottle, and that picture did not come up.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, if you go to the one on the right, there's a big gray on the right. It's right there.

[Dawson]

It didn't come up on a gray bottle.

[Adam Carolla]

Search on the right. I know, but.

[Dawson]

Okay, we'd already been through Kaopectate and you said it wasn't that, so.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, I didn't search for to. I didn't say no. I was just like, eh. But go to the right. That is a great. What I would consider a gray bottle. Yeah, sorry I said gray bottle, but I should have said gray label on the bottle.

[Rudy Pavage]

I just text my mom, you can

[Adam Carolla]

go the one on the right. If it comes up, it won't let you do it. But anyway. All right, so that's it. Well, there you go. See, I'm not insane. They put a big gray thing on there.

[Rudy Pavage]

Yeah, I just texted my mom and said what was the stuff we had? She immediately hit me back. Kopectate. Yeah, she knew right away.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so what else do we got?

[Rudy Pavage]

So this was obviously going to happen. But regulators were want State Farm barred from writing new policies for a year for allegedly violating state laws after the Los Angeles wildfires. But experts say that current customers shouldn't panic. State regulators are pushing for a multimillion dollar fine and possible license suspension from State Farm after a California Department of Insurance probe found it delayed claims, lowballed payouts and shuffled adjusters, causing confusion for policyholders.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, look, they're in the business of not paying. Yeah. And getting paid. Everyone wants to know what's going on. Like why they arguing? Cuz if someone said, look, I'm in the business of I get a dollar a day from everyone who works here and I keep that money and I invest that money, but if one of them twists their ankle on the weekend, then I gotta take a lot more money and give it to them. And then at some point I got a call going, hey, I twisted my ankle, I'd go, really? Well. Cause I don't want to give you your money back. That's how it works. That's the business they're in. They don't want to give you your money back.

[Rudy Pavage]

Same with the irs. As soon as they take your money, they probably not gonna give it back.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but they didn't promise to give it back if you asked for it or if you fake twisting your ankle. I wish I could throw myself down a flight of stairs and get my IRS money back. I would definitely fucking take that plunge. But they also have to deal with a lot of people that didn't really twist their ankle. So they're in the business. Their business is taking your money and not giving it back. That's what they do. So expect this from them. But they also are business and they're regulated and they gotta follow rules. And if they break those rules, then they're gonna get into trouble. I. I don't want to defend insurance companies. I will defend any company that tries to do business in California because it's so fucking diff. They make it so difficult that I feel sympathy for the companies that try to do business in California. All right, let's do one more. If you have one more.

[Rudy Pavage]

Well, to go out on a happy note for you, ace. Kamala Harris has weighed in on the LA mayor's race and issued an endorsement in several other contests, except refused to give her governor candidate endorsement. The former VP who now lives in Malibu, endorsed incumbent Karen Bass for mayor of the second largest city in the

[Adam Carolla]

U.S. is it any like, is there a version of life where like, I or a politician go, look, I'm gonna give Tim Johnson over there my endorsement. Obviously, I'm white, he's white, I'm a dude, he's a dude, so that's my guy. Would that work? Cause I know black and colored people just have to do that, but the reverse is kind of weird, right? Like, is there any possibility that a person of color would not endorse another person? I mean, if they were a Republican, they wouldn't do it. But who was a Democrat or was between this white Democrat and that black Democrat, and you just went, fuck it, I'm Barack Obama. I'm giving it to the ginger. Yeah, like, I don't think that would ever happen. Which is kind of fun that they can do that. Nobody cares. Karen Bass is equally ineffective and vacuous and shitty at her job as Kamala Harris. I'm now more curious about the people that think they do something than others. Her thing is to talk about how broken everything is and how everything needs to be fixed. And she's been there for four years, breaking everything and fucking everything up. She's sitting around going, you know. You know what they love to do is they go, these are old problems. These problems are old. The Democrats have been running LA for over 20 years. So whatever problem you say is an old problem is on you and your party. So you can go, this is. Well, who should we blame it on? Garcetti from a number of years ago? Or should we go back to Antonio Villaragoza from 2009? Like, how far back do you wanna go? Cuz it's all your party. So basically what you're saying is your party is not good at running things because you're saying Louisiana is a Piece of shit. We got a lot of problems and it's broken. I need a second term to fix it. I need a second term to fix the shit I couldn't fix in the first four years. So here's your argument. We need me to fix the shit I couldn't fix in four years, not the shit I couldn't fix in six months or 14 months. The shit I couldn't fix in four years. You need me. And by the way, I didn't break the city. The city goes back and was broken for the last 20 years. Although my party's been in charge that entire time. And people I endorse and people I work with with and people I have lunch with are all the people that fucked up your city. You do the fucking math. You work it out. You tell me how this is going to work and why I should vote for you. Well, Spencer Pratt has no experience. No experience fucking up cities. Because that's. That's all I got from you. And you trying to go back a decade still puts you smack dab in the middle of your party fucking up this city. So shut the fuck up. Thank you. And even though I'm running out of post, that's why I need your vote. All right, Friday and Saturday, Las Vegas. Coming up, Kimmel's Club. Couple shows there. I think Rudy's there for one.

[Drew Lynch]

Yeah.

[Rudy Pavage]

Friday night.

[Adam Carolla]

Friday night. Thursday, Covina, Laugh Factory with a crazy specialty guest. And then we got Visalia at the Fox theater. And some date after Fox that got removed. But Saturday, there's a show somewhere around there. Do we not have room to get the Costa Mesa in there?

[Dawson]

Huh?

[Rudy Pavage]

Oh, it's on there. Sunday the 24th. You said the Costa Mesa.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, I got another. I got a date on Saturday in May. Oh, Nick may have screwed something up there. I don't know. Then the 24th. Costa Mesa, West Coast. So you can go to Ampcorola. Westwood coast is what it's called. You can go to amcarella.com for all the. Is there not enough room? Ask Nick if there's not enough room on there. I'm curious. You know, I'mkora.com for all the live shows. What do you got, Rudy?

[Rudy Pavage]

You'll catch me Friday with you in Vegas. And then next weekend, the 14th through the 16th, I'll be at the Loons on the Lake festival in the Twin Cities of Minnesota.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, we'll get to the bottom of this. Just cause it's gonna be funny. Till next time, Adam. Carolla. Oh, Ford. Drew lynch and Rudy Pavage saying mahalo.

[Dawson]

Leave us a voicemail at 888-634-1744. Do it right now and get tickets to see Adam Corolla in Vegas this [e-mail].

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