AEE 2423: Why You Should Take This Episode to Heart

Summary

Podcast Summary: All Ears English Podcast - Episode 2423: "Why You Should Take This Episode to Heart"

Release Date: June 10, 2025

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Introduction

In Episode 2423 of the All Ears English Podcast, hosts Michelle Kaplan and Aubrey Carter delve into the nuances of giving advice in English, emphasizing the importance of fostering connections over striving for perfection. This episode, titled "Why You Should Take This Episode to Heart," offers listeners practical expressions and strategies to communicate opinions gracefully, enhancing both conversational skills and cultural understanding.

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Exploring the Expression: "Take Something with a Grain of Salt"

The core focus of this episode revolves around the idiom "take something with a grain of salt." This expression serves as a pivotal tool for English learners to navigate social interactions where offering advice or opinions might otherwise create awkwardness or offense.

Aubrey Carter introduces the idiom at [04:18], highlighting its relevance in everyday conversations:

"Take something with a grain of salt. This is a really fun idiom. I'm excited to dive into this today." – Aubrey Carter [04:18]

Meaning and Usage

The phrase essentially advises not to take information too seriously or to treat it with skepticism. It's a way to suggest that the listener should consider the advice or statement without fully committing to its validity.

Michelle Kaplan elaborates on its application in offering advice:

"When you're giving advice, some people... I'll be like, well, take this with a grain of salt." – Michelle Kaplan [04:58]

Aubrey Carter further explains:

"Don't completely believe something. Don't take something too hard... It shouldn't be taken as 100%." – Aubrey Carter [05:47]

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Practical Applications and Examples

The hosts provide concrete scenarios illustrating how and when to use the idiom, enhancing listeners' understanding through relatable contexts.

Before Giving Advice

When offering guidance without imposing, the phrase helps maintain respect and openness.

Example from Aubrey Carter at [06:26]:

"I'm not an expert on this, so take it with a grain of salt... you do whatever you think you do."

Mitigating Offense

In situations where criticism or correction is involved, the idiom serves to soften the impact and prevent hurt feelings.

As Michelle Kaplan notes at [07:22]:

"Don't take it personally... Don't let your feelings be hurt by something."

Expressing Skepticism

It can be used to convey doubt about the reliability of information, ensuring that it isn't taken at face value.

Aubrey Carter shares at [08:11]:

"If someone corrects your English... take it with a grain of salt. You don't need to worry so much about grammar mistakes."

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Role-Playing Scenario

To demonstrate the practical use of the idiom and related expressions, Michelle and Aubrey engage in a role-play centered around planning a dinner party menu.

Key Exchanges:

• Michelle Kaplan: "Love salmon, but take this with a grain of salt." [14:03]

• Aubrey Carter: "Don't put too much stock in what I'm saying. You're the one who knows your guests." [15:12]

This exercise showcases how the hosts seamlessly integrate the idiom and similar phrases to offer advice while maintaining the listener's autonomy.

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Alternative Expressions for Similar Contexts

The episode also explores other phrases that convey the same sentiment as "take something with a grain of salt," providing English learners with a versatile toolkit for varied situations.

Examples Discussed:

1. "Don't put too much stock in it"

   • Usage: Advising someone not to value something excessively.
   • Example: "Don't put too much stock in what she says."

2. "Don't take it too seriously"

   • Usage: Encouraging someone to remain unfazed by remarks or situations.
   • Example: "I'll tell you my opinion, but don't take it too seriously."

3. "Don't take it at face value"

   • Usage: Suggesting skepticism towards the surface meaning of a statement.
   • Example: "Don't take what he says at face value."

4. "Take this for what it's worth"

   • Usage: Offering advice with humility regarding its value.
   • Example: "Take this for what it's worth, but I think you should consider..."

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Connection Skills in Giving Advice

A significant portion of the discussion centers on the delicate balance of offering advice without imposing, thereby maintaining and strengthening interpersonal connections.

Key Insights:

• Mitigating Awkwardness: By expressing that the advice is optional, hosts emphasize a respectful and considerate approach to communication.

• Avoiding Offense: Phrases like "take this with a grain of salt" help prevent the listener from feeling judged or criticized, fostering a more open and trusting dialogue.

• Encouraging Autonomy: Acknowledging the listener's ability to make their own decisions reinforces mutual respect and understanding.

Aubrey Carter summarizes at [16:02]:

"The key takeaway for today is to give that person the feeling that if you don't have to take my advice, keep that connection going."

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Personal Anecdotes and Reflections

Throughout the episode, Michelle and Aubrey share personal experiences that highlight the practical importance of the discussed idioms and expressions.

Aubrey Carter reflects on past behaviors at [10:45]:

"When I was younger, I would take things to heart... I have gotten better at taking things with a grain of salt."

Michelle Kaplan contributes her growth in handling criticism at [11:16]:

"I don't get offended that easily... There are bigger fish to fry."

These anecdotes serve to humanize the discussion, illustrating how mastering these expressions can lead to personal growth and improved interpersonal relationships.

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Key Takeaways and Conclusion

• Use Idioms to Soften Advice: Incorporating phrases like "take something with a grain of salt" helps in offering advice without imposing, thereby maintaining strong connections.

• Alternative Expressions Enhance Communication: Familiarity with various expressions allows for nuanced and adaptable communication in different contexts.

• Emphasize Connection Over Perfection: Prioritizing interpersonal connections over flawless language use aligns with the podcast's overarching theme of "Connection NOT Perfection."

• Self-Reflection Encourages Growth: Reflecting on personal communication styles and adapting accordingly can lead to more effective and respectful interactions.

Aubrey Carter wraps up the episode by encouraging listeners to apply these phrases in their daily conversations and share their experiences:

"Give this a try. Let us know how it goes." [17:30]

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Recommended Episodes for Further Learning

• Episode 2404: "How Mixing Up Your Grammar Makes You a Better Storyteller"
  • Focuses on the creative use of grammar to enhance storytelling skills.

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By dissecting the use of specific idioms and their applications, Episode 2423 of the All Ears English Podcast provides invaluable insights for English learners aiming to communicate more effectively and empathetically in diverse social settings.

Transcript

[Aubrey Carter]

This is an Allers English podcast, episode 2423. Why you should take this episode to heart.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Welcome to the All Ears English podcast, downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection. With your American host, Michelle Kaplan, the New York radio girl, and Aubrey Carter, the IELTS whiz, coming to you from Arizona and New York City, usa. And to get your transcripts delivered by email every week, go to allearsenglish.com subscribe.

[Aubrey Carter]

On today's episode, Aubrey and Michelle share key ways to say someone doesn't have to follow your advice. This is a huge connection skill that you should pay special attention to whenever you want to give your opinion in English.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Do you ever wish that you could just hang out with native speakers and pick up real English? Naturally, that's what it's like here on All Ears English. We're two friends having real conversations. No scripts, no. No lectures. Just fun, honest talk about life, culture and how to connect in English. It's like grabbing coffee with us and leaving with better English every time. But if you're not following Allers English, then you're probably missing some episodes. So go ahead and hit the follow button now. Wherever you listen to the show, hit Follow now and come check us out five days a week.

[Aubrey Carter]

Hey, Michelle. How are you?

Good, Aubry. So happy to be recording with you again. How are you, Aubry?

I am great. It's a beautiful day here in Arizona. I have a question for you.

Yes? About food.

I love to talk about food.

Me too.

Do you like your food to be salty? Do you add salt? And actually, my real question is before you taste food, do you find yourself adding salt before you even taste it? Sometimes.

Ooh, that's a good question. Well, I think I taste it before I add the salt.

That's good.

Unless I know for sure, but I have been known to. I. I like in, in the morning, I. I always have eggs and before I try it, I always put salt on it. I. I think I do put too much salt on food. And in fact, just the other day I salted some mushrooms that I was sauteing and Dan had to put them in the colander and wash the salt off.

Oh, nice.

There's a fine line between the perfect amount of salt and then you go. Was another time when my son, we were making a soup and we let him, we were going to let him put the salt in the soup and the top fell off and the whole salt Fell in it and we kept on trying to dilute it. And then dad got a headache cuz he just kept on trying to have all the salty soup to see if he could fix it. We had to throw it out.

Yeah, this is a total loss. We need to just toss it. I've certainly done that. I've made mashed potatoes way too salty accidentally. And I'm like, I'll just make more potatoes and add them.

Yes.

I don't want to just waste everything.

It's true. It's true. How about you, Aubry? Do you like your food salty?

I do. I really like savory snacks over sweet snacks.

Same.

But I really like them together too. Like, if I have popcorn, I want it with like some kind of sweet candy. I kind of love both. Or like a Coke, like a Coca Cola with some savory foods because I do kind of like the combo.

So do you salt things before you try them? I'm curious.

No, I asked you because this was my mother's pet peeve when she would cook for her father, my grandpa, he would add sal salt before he tasted it and then he would sometimes be like, this is way too salty.

Crazy.

He's like, why are you adding salt before you even taste it?

Right, right. Yeah, I can see how that would be frustrating. So, Aubrey, I'm so glad we're talking about salt today. We are going to be talking about an expression that is really, really a good one and it deals with the word salt. What is this expression?

It's to take something with a grain of salt. Take that with a grain of salt. This is a really fun idiom. I'm excited to dive into this today.

So do one. Aubrey, would you say this is in your vocabulary?

Absolutely. I use this a lot because we're going to dive into what this means. But when you're giving advice, some people, maybe if you have a little more ego or a little more confidence, then you're giving advice willy nilly without ask. Giving any caveats. I am not that way. If I give advice, I'll be like, well, take this with a grain of salt. Or say like, take this for what it's worth. I'll say that too. Almost every time I give advice, I'm like, you know, here's what I think. But you do. You do whatever you think you do.

You. I love that. So, yeah, very, very good point. Willy nilly. I love that. Guys, that will probably be one of our bonus words.

Absolutely. Yeah. Have the app, you get all of these keywords. Right. So if you don't, be sure to download the app. All earsenglish.com app. We make it really easy. We highlight the really interesting keywords from every episode and you can just add them to your vocab list.

Awesome. Love it. All right, so let's dive deeper into this. So take it with a grain of salt. So, yeah, it. Don't completely believe something. Don't take something too hard. It's saying that what the person is about to say or some action shouldn't be taken as 100%. You shouldn't take it too seriously. What do you think?

Right. Often we'll say this. If we don't have any actual scientific evidence for something, it's just based on our experience or our thoughts. Right. We'll often say this so that people aren't thinking that we're coming from a place of expertise. Right. This is just kind of my thoughts. Take it or leave it.

Right? Yeah, exactly. So. So when would we use this? So, I mean, one that I can't think of is before we give advice like you were talking about, Aubry, advice that we're not 100% on. So I could say, so, Aubry, I'm not an expert on this, so take it with a grain of salt. But I really think you should look into getting more points on your credit card because you're missing out on benefits.

Nice. Yes. I just said this to my daughter. She's. She's only 18. She's in a relationship, and sometimes she'll me for advice, and I'm like, take this with a grain of salt. Because I did not have a serious relationship that young. Right. I was older before, like, I had a serious boyfriend. So I'm being really honest about the fact that I can, you know, give you advice or talk from my life experience, but I didn't actually go through what you're going through. Take it with a grain of salt.

Right, right, right. Very good. So. Or what's another way that we might use it?

Yeah, you can use it to make someone feel better about something that someone else said. So for example. Oh, she can be pretty direct. Just take it with a grain of salt. It's not personal. Now, this is a good point because this has a slightly different meaning. It's more like, don't get offended. Don't take it personally. Yeah, right. If we take it with a grain of salt, we want to not be. Not let our feelings be hurt by something.

Right, Exactly. So don't take it to heart. That's something you might hear somebody say don't take it to heart. Don't, like, let your heart be affected by this.

Absolutely. And I think this is. So with language learning, I've had to do this as I'm learning French and Spanish. Often, we're. We're realizing that what someone is saying, we can't take offense, Right. We have to take it with a grain of salt. If they're. Maybe they're correcting our grammar. Maybe they're sharing that we knew an idiom. We, like, used an idiom incorrectly. This happens. I try to take that with a grain of salt and realize they're just trying to help me improve. And I'm grateful for the correction. Right. If I took it seriously, if I took it to heart, then that might really hurt my language learning, because then I'm worried about making mistakes. I'm worried about people criticizing me. Like, no, take it with a grain of salt. Don't worry about it.

Right, right. Yeah, exactly. I mean, and it could also be used to say something shouldn't really be believed. So my sister tends to exaggerate about her cooking. So take it with a grain of salt. It's good, but not amazing.

Oh, I love that. Yes. And with language learning, right. If someone corrects your English and be like, take it with a grain of salt. You don't need to worry so much about grammar mistakes. Right. We're worried more about connection. So, yeah, that's another place where you could give someone advice if they're feeling really down about their English learning. Be like, take it with a grain of salt. That's not the most important thing to worry about.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

[Michelle Kaplan]

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[Aubrey Carter]

Okay. So, Aubry, do you tend to take advice or recommendations with a grain of salt, or do you like to try things for yourself instead of just believing what you hear? What do you.

How.

How does it work for you?

That's a really good question. I do think that I have gotten better about this. When I was younger, I would take things to heart. I would let things hurt my feelings. And I have gotten better about, you know, recognizing that I can't change anyone's mind, but I can decide whether that affects me or not, whether that hurts my feelings, whether that offends me. So I think I am better at taking things with a grain of salt. I'll just let it, like, roll off my back and not bother me more than I used to, at least. What about you, Michelle?

I think so, too. I think as I get older, I'm. I, I don't know. I don't get offended that easily. There, you know, there are. It's funny, there are some instances where I start to kind of get, oh, I don't, you know, I don't know about that. And. And then all of a sudden, it'll roll off. I'm like, I don't really care.

Let it go.

Yes.

Whereas, you know, when you were younger, you might have really been torn up about that. Right now it's like, no, I'm not gonna let it bother me. There are bigger fish to fry.

Bigger fish worries, guys. Also, we want to remind you to hit the follow. You are listening to Allers English or the business English podcast or I Energy, because we don't want you to miss anything. Just make it easy. Let us bring the episode straight to your queue so you can hear them.

Absolutely. All right, let's dive into some other similar phrases that we use to say this same thing. One thing is we say, don't put too much stock in it. Don't put too much stock in something. So, for example, we might say, she acts like a big New York expert, but don't too much stock in what she. Don't put too much stock in what she says. She's really, really picky. That's funny.

Yeah, exactly. Or you could say, don't take it too Seriously. Well, I'll tell you my opinion, but don't take it too seriously. I'm still learning about all this.

Yeah. Or don't take it at face value. Remember not to take what he says at face value. He's been known to stretch the truth a little. This is. You're just warning someone to, like, you know, don't take offense or like, maybe don't believe them entirely because it might not. There might be some exaggeration here.

Right, right, exactly. So, Aubrey, should we put this together in a role play?

Yeah, let's do it.

All right, so here we are. We're not using all of them in this one because I. It.

This is something where it'd be weird to say. Exactly.

Yeah, we just did. We just did a role play with the word actually. Guys, if you didn't hear that episode yet, head on over. It was episode 2421, which was with the word actually. And there we were saying, it's okay to it a hundred times in a role play.

Use it a lot in one conversation.

In this one. We're not going to use all of these right now. So here we go. I am asking you for some help with a menu that I'm putting together for a dinner party.

Oh, fun.

Okay, so do you think salmon is a good idea?

Love salmon, but. And take this with a grain of salt. What about a veggie option, you think?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Aubrey Carter]

So many people are vegetarians these days. It just may be safer. But don't put too much stock in what I'm saying. You're the one who knows your guest.

That's true, but it's a good point.

Yeah. Oh, I really like these. And it's true. You couldn't say, you know, if they do all have the. Basically the same meaning. So it'd be strange to just be repeating yourself, but.

Right.

I think my favorite of all of these is one we used at the beginning of. Of the episode, which is take this for what it's worth. I say that the most often. It means the same thing. Like, take this for what it's worth. But I think there should be a veggie option. Has the same thing. Like, don't.

Right.

Too much stock, in my opinion. But here's my advice.

Right. That's a great one, too. Yeah. So I mean. I mean. And again, these are so good for connection, all of these, because you're kind of pulling back a little bit. You're saying, you know, you don't have to believe everything I say, but I do want to say My opinion. So just a really good way of giving advice without with kind of being a little safe about it.

Yes. And if we look at the role play, this is done so well when I was like, love salmon, but. And take this with a grain of salt. What we sort of interrupt ourselves when we feel ourselves about to give an opinion to make sure that we're saying, like, totally fine with whatever you decide, but I'm gonna give my opinion here. This is such a great phrase to soften it a little bit.

I love that. And then I said. You said, don't too much put. Don't put too much stock in what I'm saying. You are the one who knows your.

Guests, so it is kind of a tongue twister. I feel like I sort of tripped over it as well. Don't put too much.

Don't put too much stock in it. Yeah, you. And you said you are the one who knows your guests. So you.

You.

You're giving your opinion. But you may. You. I may know that all of my friends love salmon.

Right.

And that they're not vegetarian. So you're trying to give me some guidance as to what you think is a safer option. But I. You're saying, but you know best, right?

Yes. And that's really. I think the biggest connection skill here is that when you give advice, when you give your opinion, you're creating this possible awkward moment when your friend doesn't go with your opinion, when they decide to do what they were going to do anyway. That when they don't take your advice and freezes like this, Take the awkwardness out of this. You're saying, I have no problem. I'm not going to be offended if you don't take my advice.

Yeah. I think that's really the key for this episode. The key takeaway for today is to give that person that feeling of, you know, if you don't have to take my advice, keep that connection going. Another episode that we want to guide you guys to to is 2404, which was how mixing up your grammar makes you a better storyteller.

So I think that was a fun one.

Right? You and Lindsay have talked about storytelling a lot. So, guys, definitely check that one out. So, yeah, I think we really went into the takeaway already about how this is such a key moment for connection.

Yeah, it's funny. I also want to share. I was just listening to Las Culturista's podcast. Amy Poehler was a guest, and she. It was interesting. She said for a year, she made it a goal to never give advice unless someone asked for advice. And that whole year, no one asked her for advice. She's like, I've been giving all this advice without people asking for it. So I was thinking about that a lot. And I think these phrases really help if you are going to share advice. But I think it's probably a good takeaway for all of us, too, to think about, you know, if we're sharing advice, if we're giving our opinion, is it welcome? Has it been asked for? I think I do that a lot too, where I'm like, here I'm giving my opinion that no one's asked for.

That's very interesting. And now I'm curious to try it for myself.

Yeah. We'll have to report back, right? Yeah.

Yes.

How long is it before someone asks for your advice?

Aubrey, we should do that.

Let's do it. I'm in.

All right, guys, well, thank you so much for listening to today's episode. We really appreciate it. And give this. Give this a try. Let us know how it goes.

Absolutely awesome. Michelle. See you next time.

All right, Bye, Aubry.

Bye.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Thanks for listening to all ears. English. Would you like to know your English level? Take our two minute quiz, go to allearsenglish.com forward/fluencyscore. And if you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything. See you next time.