All Ears English Podcast: Episode 2426 Summary Title: Build Connection By Softening Commands in English
Hosts: Lindsay McMahon and Aubrey Carter
Release Date: June 16, 2025

Introduction

In Episode 2426 of the All Ears English Podcast, hosts Lindsay McMahon and Aubrey Carter delve into the nuanced art of softening commands in English to foster better connections and enhance communication. Aimed at intermediate to advanced English learners, this episode provides practical strategies and insights into using polite language structures effectively in various contexts.

The Importance of Softening Commands

The episode opens with a discussion on the strength of the word "command" when directed towards others. Lindsay humorously relates it to commanding a pet, emphasizing that such a term is seldom appropriate for human interactions.

Lindsey McMahon [02:00]: "Not really. No. No, it's too strong. Yeah."

Aubrey concurs, highlighting alternative verbs like "request," "ask," or "tell," which carry a softer tone.

Aubrey Carter [02:08]: "We might request, we'll ask, maybe even tell. We'll tell someone to do something."

Exploring Phrases to Soften Commands

The core of the episode focuses on four key phrases—make sure, be sure, be careful, and try—that help soften commands and requests, making them more polite and conducive to positive interactions.

1. Make Sure

"Make sure" is used to gently emphasize the importance of an action without sounding demanding.

Aubrey Carter [05:42]: "So, for example, I might say, 'Oh, make sure to water the plants every day.'"

Grammar Note:
"Make sure" can be followed by an infinitive (e.g., "make sure to water") or by a subject and verb (e.g., "make sure he understands").

2. Be Sure

Similar to "make sure," "be sure" conveys a polite reminder or instruction.

Lindsey McMahon [07:35]: "Be sure to pay the medical bill on time means the same as make sure."

Subtle Nuances:
While both phrases are interchangeable, "be sure" often feels slightly more accommodating.

Aubrey Carter [07:44]: "'Be sure' doesn't have the implication you think they'll forget—it feels a bit softer."

3. Be Careful

"Be careful" introduces an element of caution, often used as a gentle warning.

Lindsey McMahon [08:18]: "Be careful to avoid spilling your coffee."

Grammar Note:
This phrase follows the same grammatical structure as "make sure" and "be sure," either with an infinitive or a subject and verb.

4. Try

"Try" offers an encouraging nudge towards taking a particular action without imposing.

Aubrey Carter [10:44]: "For example, you might say, 'Try to arrive on time.'"

Grammar Note:
"Try" can be followed by an infinitive (e.g., "try to arrive") or a gerund (e.g., "try drinking more water"), offering flexibility in usage.

Understanding One-Upmanship

A significant portion of the episode introduces the concept of "one-upping," where individuals attempt to outdo others in conversation, which can hinder genuine connection.

Aubrey Carter [12:20]: "It's often how we see this used is exaggerate how much worse or better your situation is."

Lindsey McMahon [12:52]: "People get really triggered by one uppers. It's something in us that gets really triggered or discouraged."

The hosts suggest that being mindful of falling into one-upper behavior is crucial for maintaining meaningful dialogues.

Practical Application: Role Play

To illustrate the use of softened commands, Lindsay and Aubrey engage in a role-play scenario where Lindsay acts as a property owner providing instructions to Aubrey, a guest.

Key Highlights:

• Quiet Hours:

  Lindsey McMahon [13:37]: "Quiet hours start at 10, so try to keep the noise level down at night."

• Key Management:

  Lindsey McMahon [14:00]: "Be careful to keep track of the keys. There's a $50 replacement fee if one is lost."

• Check-Out Procedures:

  Lindsey McMahon [15:16]: "Be sure to check out by 10 and make sure to lock it when you leave."

This exercise underscores the importance of varying language to avoid sounding repetitive or harsh, thereby enhancing the overall politeness and effectiveness of communication.

Takeaways and Conclusions

The episode emphasizes that mastering the art of softening commands is pivotal for achieving higher levels of English proficiency (C1 level), where precision and politeness in language become essential. By integrating phrases like "make sure," "be sure," "be careful," and "try," learners can navigate conversations more gracefully, fostering better interpersonal connections.

Aubrey Carter [16:06]: "We're softening in order to be respectful and polite and to connect."

Lindsay wraps up by encouraging listeners to practice these techniques to enhance their conversational skills and achieve greater fluency.

Notable Quotes

• Aubrey Carter [02:50]: "Make sure you'd have to sit and think about it a second."
• Lindsey McMahon [05:26]: "We want people to know about it."
• Aubrey Carter [07:54]: "It's a little more polite, more, I don't know, accommodating."

Conclusion

Episode 2426 of the All Ears English Podcast offers valuable lessons on the subtle art of softening commands to build stronger connections in English conversations. By understanding and applying these techniques, learners can communicate more effectively and politely, enhancing both personal and professional relationships.

Explore More:

• Take Your English Level Quiz: Visit allearsenglish.com/fluencyscore to determine your current proficiency.
• Subscribe and Stay Connected: Join the All Ears English community for more insightful episodes and practical language tips.