AEE 2505: Take the Social Pressure Off with a Theme Night in English

Summary

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All Ears English Podcast – Episode 2505

Take the Social Pressure Off with a Theme Night in English

Release Date: October 30, 2025
Hosts: Lindsay McMahon ("the English adventurer") & Michelle Kaplan ("the New York radio girl")

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Episode Overview

In this lively episode, Lindsay and Michelle discuss how to use "theme nights"—like game night or movie night—as a simple, natural, and effective way to invite people over and make socializing in English less intimidating. They focus on how themes provide structure to social gatherings, making it easier to break the ice, form new friendships, and blend different social groups. ESL learners will find practical tips for conversation, vocabulary, and American social customs, all grounded in the show’s signature philosophy: "Connection, not perfection!"

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Why Host a Theme Night?

• Inviting People Over: Both hosts talk about their experiences with inviting friends and neighbors to their homes, and how outdoor spaces or cozy indoor gatherings can create a comfortable and inviting environment.
  • “The point is, it’s good to have friends over. Good to spend time with family and friends.” – Lindsay [05:02]
• Making New Friends: Michelle encourages listeners to use theme nights when transitioning acquaintances (work friends, volunteer contacts, etc.) into real friends.
  • “It’s like dating in a way. But this is more about the friendship way…there’s some sort of friendship spark.” – Michelle [05:41]

2. How Themes Lower Social Pressure

• Structure Reduces Anxiety:
  • “Do you think giving the night a theme sort of takes a little social pressure off because it provides structure?” – Lindsay [06:07]
  • “I do think so…especially for the first time, it allows the person to know what are they going to be doing, get them excited about this activity, take some of that pressure off.” – Michelle [06:20]
• Grammar Construction: The typical structure is “[Noun] + night” (e.g., “Game night”, “Movie night”) [06:50].

3. Popular Theme Night Ideas

• Classic Examples:
  • Game night, Movie night, Pizza night, Wine and cheese night, Breakfast for dinner night [09:24–09:35].
  • “Breakfast for dinner, please invite me to that if you do!” – Lindsay [09:33]
• Customizing the Theme:
  • “You could even be specific…Scrabble night, Poker night.” – Michelle [09:24]
  • “If you say 'pizza night,' that’s usually you’re gonna order pizza, and if you say 'pizza making night,' we’re actually going to get our hands in the dough and make the pizza together. Totally different evening.” – Lindsay [21:03]

4. Theme Nights as an Icebreaker and Social Mixer

• Blending Social ‘Bubbles’:
  • Bringing together friends from different circles (work, school, kids' daycare, etc.) is easier with a theme.
  • “One way to facilitate that could potentially be having a theme night.” – Lindsay [12:19]
• More Than Just for New Friends:
  • “I don’t think this is necessarily just for new friends…can’t ever hurt to have something to be excited about, especially…a lot of people love games, they love competition.” – Michelle [13:00–13:33]

5. Other Types of Themes

• Book Clubs & Article Clubs:
  • “I know that my partner does an article club…instead of reading a whole book, they read an article and get together once a month.” – Lindsay [17:00]
  • “Book club has become famous for no one actually reading the book…you just get around and you drink wine and have snacks.” – Michelle [17:22]
• Potluck Dinners:
  • “I’m going to throw a potluck at my house next Friday. Are you available?” – Michelle [17:42]
• Cooking Together:
  • “We should pick a recipe and all cook it together next week.” – Michelle [18:16]
  • Bonding through food and group cooking can create strong friendships.

6. Language & Grammar Tips

• Inviting with Confidence:
  • Using a theme makes it easier to invite people without feeling awkward.
  • “It gives you more confidence as the person asking, because you’re not just saying, ‘Hey, do you want to come to my house?’” – Michelle [14:34]
• Useful Phrases for Inviting:
  • “Would you be interested in coming over tomorrow for game night?” [13:39]
  • “If you’re free, you should come by my house. I’m having a wine and cheese night.” [14:25]
  • Specify time, date, and if it’s a recurring event:
    • “Every Tuesday, my friends and I have a movie night if you’d like to join.” – Michelle [20:00]

7. Role-play Demonstration [20:17–21:29]

• The hosts act out a scene where two work friends invite each other to a pizza making night and a book club, showing learners natural phrasing and confidence in invitations.
  • “Would you be interested in coming over tomorrow for pizza making night? My friends and I love to try new pizza recipes.” – Michelle [20:24]
  • “Oh wow, that sounds delicious…also, I’ve been meaning to ask you, I’m thinking about starting a book club. Are you interested?” – Lindsay [20:35]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Structure and Comfort:
  • “Structure makes things more approachable, maybe more simplified. Right?” – Lindsay [14:46]
• On Social Opportunity:
  • “If you’ve realized that there’s someone from work or someone that you see at different functions that you kind of click with, but you haven’t actually asked to hang out, try using one of these.” – Michelle [22:18]
• On Empowerment:
  • “It also makes you more of a leader, right? An organizer. And that’s empowering…an automatic conversation starter, too.” – Lindsay [22:43]

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Tips & Takeaways

How to Plan and Invite for a Theme Night

• Choose a specific and fun theme that creates a natural conversation topic.
• Use the “[Noun] + night” structure for invitations.
• Be specific about time, date, and activities to make guests feel at ease.
• This strategy works for new acquaintances and established friends alike.
• Themes facilitate mixing different social groups.
• Don’t be afraid to take the initiative—theme nights make you a connector and help strengthen bonds.

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Suggested Further Listening

• Episode 2504: “How to Blend Your Social Bubbles in English” [Reference: 12:28, 22:04]
  • Explores combining friends from different parts of your life.

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Segment | Timestamp | |-----------------------------------------|------------| | Introductions and recent hosting | 03:00 | | Discussing the power of theme nights | 05:06 | | Why themes lower social pressure | 06:07 | | Theme night examples and language | 08:53–09:35| | Discussing blending bubbles (groups) | 11:38 | | Other theme ideas (book club, potluck) | 16:45 | | Role-play demonstration | 20:17 | | Takeaway: Using theme nights for connection | 22:16 |

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Final Takeaway

Don’t hesitate to reach out and invite someone over using a theme night! It’s a practical way to break the ice, encourages conversation, and makes everyone feel more comfortable—while boosting your confidence in English and expanding your social circle.

“Have fun at your next pizza making night!” – Lindsay [23:19]

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Transcript

[A]

This is an All Ears English podcast.

[B]

Episode 2505 Take the Social pressure off with a theme night in English.

[A]

Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection with your American hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer and Michelle Kaplan, the.

[B]

New York radio girl coming to you.

[A]

From Colorado and New York City, usa. To get real time transcripts right on your phone and create your personalized vocabulary list, try the All Ears English app for iOS and Android. Start your seven day free trial at allearsenglish.com forward/app.

[C]

Are there friends you've been wanting to invite over but you're not quite sure how? Plan a theme night today. Learn why using a theme like game night or movie night can make socializing easier in English.

[B]

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[A]

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[A]

Out of the ordinary. Hey Michelle, how's it going today?

[C]

Hi Lindsay. I'm good. How are you?

[A]

Good. Michelle, when was the last time you invited people over to your house? Do you like to host?

[C]

Do you like to do that kind of thing more? So recently I've enjoyed it, but recently I've been more going to other people's houses, which I have to change because I feel like it's my turn.

[A]

Oh, do you prefer to Go to other people's houses.

[C]

It's. I'm happy either way. I'm just happy to be with people. But I. I did. Let's see. I would say about a month ago, we had for kind of a late night dessert slash game thing for the kids. We had neighbors over and our very close friends. So, uh, that was a lot of fun. That's the last time.

[A]

That's so fun. That's.

[C]

How about you? Do you like to invite people over?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I. I love to. We just got. Well, a few years ago, we got one of those fire pits and we need to set it up. Yeah, I love. I love sitting on patios around fires, doing s' mores or just doing like, yo, drinking a glass of wine or something and having cheese. And I love that kind of thing, you know?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So I like it when I can be outside. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, I love it too. And yeah, my next door neighbor, they just put in a patio and With a fire pit. So the other night I came back. We were coming back pretty late from somewhere and they were sitting out there and I just went and I sat with them and it was so perfect.

[A]

So good.

[C]

I don't have any sort of backyard yet because we just moved, but we'll be figuring that out.

[A]

Oh, yeah, you should design a whole backyard. You really should. Because I feel like, I don't know, it encourages being more social because something about being outside, I don't like being cooped up, like, cooped up in a house.

[C]

You know, we're more in the front, which is nice too, because we have kind of a. We have like a small front porch. And so we've. We're trying to make that like our temporary while we save up money for our backyard. And it's kind of nice because then you see everybody too. So nice. I love it.

[A]

I love it. The point is, it's good. It's good to have friends over. Good to spend time with family and friends.

[C]

Yeah, definitely. So that's what we're talking about today. We're going to share a super easy and useful way to invite people to hang out. So, yes, this episode is really about making new friends, forming a group. This could be work friends. This could be just a friend you see at a. At a volunteer event, for example. So it's kind of, you know these people and you're ready to start a new chapter of your friendship. You're kind of taking it to the next level. You know, we all have those people where we know them and it's. You Feel like, oh, there's some sort of connection. It's, it's, it's like dating in a way. But this is more about the friendship way, you know, that there's something. There's some sort of friendship spark. Right.

[A]

There's the possibility. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. So, but one thing that you can do, guys, this is our suggestion is to think of some sort of theme. Yes. Yeah. And we're gonna use this construction, which is noun plus night. Right?

[A]

Yeah. This is really interesting. I love this idea because do you think doing this kind of like giving the night a theme, do you think it sort of takes a little social pressure off because it provides structure?

[C]

Right. It's not. Yes, I, I do think so. And, you know, instead of just saying, oh, you want to come over.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And hang out.

[C]

Right. Especially for in the beginning, you know, it is good to have some sort of structure. Oh, this is what we're going to be doing. And it's just, I think especially for the first time, it allows the person to know what are they going to be doing. Get them excited about this activity. Take some of that pressure off.

[A]

Yes. I love that. I'm excited to get into this because there's grammar here, there is social connection here, there's vocabulary here. So, guys, hey, hang out with us on this episode.

[B]

But first, we want to make sure.

[A]

Our listeners know about our next new course that is coming very soon. We have been busy, busy this fall and we will be releasing our very first English pronunciation course coming out in the next few weeks. Guys, this is huge. The whole idea behind this course is not to teach you the American accent, the British accent, the Australian accent. We incorporate all of those accents in this course. This is to teach you kind of the system of English pronunciation. You know, it's a special system. It's a stress time language. It's not a syllable time language. If you speak Mandarin, if you speak Italian, if you speak Spanish, you're using a language that has an entirely different system. And you need to know that. And we'll show you that in the course. Michelle.

[C]

Yeah, that's really. It's like going behind the scenes and the hacks really learning about the, the, the keys to it that maybe we haven't put together, but we're letting you into the linguistic side. Yeah.

[A]

This is being a detective and going behind the curtain of the language. And we're seeing not just individual sounds that most courses do. We're showing you how to understand, like the heartbeat of English, the rhythm of English.

[C]

There's a lot you Said that that was beautiful.

[A]

There's a lot to learn there. So, guys, go and get on the early access list. It's coming out very soon, but get on the list. You'll be one of the very first to hear about it. Go to allearsenglish.com pronunciation and Michelle, would.

[B]

You spell that for us?

[A]

Sure.

[C]

That's allersenglish.com P R, O N U N. C I A T I O N. Long word.

[A]

Long word.

[C]

It is a long word.

[A]

So we'll see you there, guys. Very excited for you to check out this course coming soon. Okay, Michelle, let's get back to movie night, game night. What are some examp then?

[C]

Yeah, those are some of the examples. So these are the. Again, you just something night helps. It's a good way to name a theme. Right. Name the structure for the evening. And this doesn't mean that we're saying now you're going to come and there's going to be an agenda and we're going to make. It's like, you know, it's just. It's just some sort of framework so that somebody can say, oh, okay, this is what I'm going to be doing. So. Yeah, exactly. Movie night, game night. You could even be specific in that. Scrabble night, Poker night.

[A]

There's so much we could do here. Wine and cheese night, Pizza night or pizza making night. Breakfast for dinner night. I mean, there's so much. Yes.

[C]

Oh, my gosh. Breakfast for dinner.

[A]

Please invite me to that if you do.

[C]

Same. Same here. Yeah. This morning my daughter was crying hysterically because I wouldn't make her Mac macaroni and cheese for breakfast.

[A]

Oh, she's one of those people that likes normal food at breakfast. See, that I can't do. I do the other way. I love breakfast for dinner, but I can't do pizza for breakfast. Yeah, yeah. No, no.

[C]

So, yeah. Lindsay. What. Which one of those are you most likely to attend or to. To throw at your house?

[A]

I. I wouldn't turn down the wine and cheese night. I know you're in circumstances, but probably movie night, game night. I'm not. I'm a little bit cooler on games. It depends on what we're playing.

[C]

I remember you saying that. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I like a game night. Recently I've become. We've become close friends with this couple and they play a lot of games. And so we have been doing more games, which is interesting. Yeah.

[A]

I feel like games are having like a renaissance. Like a lot of millennials in their 30s and 40s play games now. I don't know what I feel like. Maybe more than other generations at different times. You know, I imagine in the 1950s, it was two couples getting together, sitting in the sitting room, and the guys are smoking cigars. And, you know, I don't. I just. I don't know. I think things change in terms of how people pass their time, maybe.

[C]

Yeah, that's true. Yeah. I mean, so, Lindsay, again, this is usual. This goes back to what we were saying. It's good to. It's a good way to be specific, have a theme. And, you know, it's just. Instead of just kind of being aimless, at least we have something again, especially for this first hangout, this is kind of something where it might feel. Make everyone feel a little bit more comfortable if you're coming for something specific.

[A]

Right, right.

[C]

It could also be to gather some people for a specific TV show you watch and know your friends watch, or even a sports game, if you're into sports.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And it's just a nice way to invite people casually to your house, but with, like, some sort of fun plan involved.

[A]

Yeah. This episode ties in really nicely with the one that Aubry and I just recorded based on some insight I gathered in Norway. So it was about how to blend your bubbles, and it came out in.

[C]

The last couple of weeks.

[A]

So if you missed it, and I think a game night or a movie night having a theme could be a way to blend your bubbles, meaning blend your groups of friends from different aspect, like from kids daycare, you have friends. Right. From school, you have friends. From work, you have friends. And do you bring them all together on the same evening? I think we do that. I think we try to do that sometimes in American culture. I guess it happens less and less in different cultures around the world. But one way to facilitate that could potentially be having a theme night.

[C]

Right? Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And guys, we will give you the episode number and name so you can listen to that one.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Wait, this is 2505. Actually, that was yesterday.

[A]

Oh, well, there we go then. Hopefully our listeners caught that one. There you go. If you missed yesterday's episode. Episode. Go check it out. But, Michelle, one thing I want to say. Do you think that these types of night themes are necessary if you're really close to friends? Like, let's say if you have a couple you're inviting over that are like your best. Best friends do, would you tend to do that less with those people? Or, like, would you depend.

[C]

Yeah, if. If you would need to say, oh, something nice, you can still do it. I, again, like my friends and I, you know, we might say, oh, should we have a movie night or should we. I still think that it's good and it gets people excited about it. So I don't think that this is necessarily just for new friends. I think it's needed less if you're just friends with someone. Oh, hey, you guys want to come over? Right. Then it's a little bit more casual. But it can't ever hurt to have something to be excited about, especially.

[A]

A lot of people love games. They love competition. They're competitive. Right. So they get really excited about that.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. So here, let's show how this would sound. So, okay. Hey, Lindsay, would you be interested in coming over tomorrow for game night? I'm having a few friends over and we're going to play Scrabble. So this also goes to that social bubble.

[A]

Yeah. And I want to highlight something you did grammatically here. You said we were going to play Scrabble, so that's interesting. And we should do another episode on that. I. I suppose we probably did, but years ago. I think we need to revisit it. Michelle. Yeah.

[C]

It is so funny how we do that.

[A]

It's strange. It almost makes it sound like the night has already happened. And you never played Scrabble, but that's not what happened. So stay tuned. Hit follow, guys to catch that episode. That's a really high level grammar point.

[C]

Yeah, for sure. And what, what's another example, Lindsay?

[A]

I could say, hi, Michelle. Hey. If you're free, you should come by my house. I'm having a wine and cheese night. I would definitely be there for that.

[C]

So very friendly. Very, very confident. Also, I think it gives you more confidence as the person asking, because you're not just saying, hey, do you want to come to my house? Yeah.

[A]

There's a structure. There's a structure. Structure makes things more approachable, maybe more simplified. Right?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Love it.

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[A]

All right, Michelle, what else do we need to know here? Other types of themes or things people do.

[C]

Right. If, if you're not using game night move, movie night, wine and cheese night. There are also other specific things you invite people to when you're first getting to know them. So for example, book club. Lindsay, have you ever been in a book club?

[A]

Yeah, I don't think I have actually. Maybe as a kid I was, but. So for example, I'm thinking about starting a book club. Are you interested? Yeah. I know that my partner does an article club so instead of having to read a whole book, they read an article and get together once a month. So it's kind of cool. You get the same benefit of like getting together, discussing, but you don't have to go through a whole.

[C]

Right. I think book club has become famous for no one actually reading the book and you just get around and you drink wine and have snacks and you just maybe say a few things about the book.

[A]

But yeah, that's probably true.

[C]

Yeah, I'm not in a book club, but that's what I hear.

[A]

That's. I've seen that on the movies. Yeah. Yep.

[C]

Or there's potluck. Right. So that's again when. That's when somebody, everybody brings a dish. So I'm going to throw a potluck at my house next Friday. Are you available?

[A]

This is important to know. We've talked about this on the show but a while ago and also certain functions can be potluck. Right. So it's not always just that. It's someone coming to your house and the whole thing is planned around a potluck. Sometimes there's an event and there's going to be food and they'll say, oh, it's potluck. And that means you need to bring a dish.

[C]

Right? Right. Yeah. Very good point. Yeah.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

And then there's also. You might consider saying, oh, we're gonna cook something together as a group. So even just recently, my friend and I were saying, oh, we should. We should pick out a whole menu. I mean, pretty much this exact example. We should pick a recipe and I'll cook it together next week.

[A]

So that's fun. Yeah.

[C]

I mean, one of the ways that we became friends with. And I think I talked about this a little bit before, or like our current very close friends, we kind of, you know, broke the ice by all making. Well, I say all. My friend made us all a key lime pie.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

I think I was telling you. And so cooking can just be like a huge connection. Huge moment. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

No, that's huge. I love that. And origin stories can be a huge connection moment. Maybe we do an episode, Michelle, about origin stories of friendships and how people refer to them.

[B]

And if someone.

[A]

It's kind of an inside joke. Right? So, like, if. If you're at a party and then you're the new one in the group and you hear that, how do you react? Like, what do you do? Right. Yeah, that would make a cool episode, don't you think?

[C]

Wait, what do you mean? Like, how.

[A]

Yeah, like you said something you told us last time on the show, right? About there's a comment about key lime. Like, that's a good key lime. Or what is it? What is your inside joke?

[C]

No, just we're all obsessed with lime, and now every time we get together, there's always a lot, like some sort of lime.

[A]

Okay, so like, how do you, like. What's the language around that? You know, right around that, like, sharing that.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

I think our listeners would love to hear that.

[C]

Very cool. Yeah. Oh, that would be fun. Okay, sounds good, guys. Hit follow. So, guys, and remember to be specific about date and time. So if it's a recurring event, you can also give some background for the invite. You could say, oh, every Tuesday, my friends and I have a movie night if you'd like to join, you know.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But, yeah, we will. We are definitely going to go into more of those origin stories. I like that. So should we do a role play?

[A]

Yeah, let's do it. Yeah, let's do it. So here we are. Work friends, right? Work friends.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

All right. Hey, Lindsay. Hi. Would you be interested in coming over tomorrow for pizza making night? My friends and I love to try new pizza recipes.

[A]

Oh, wow, that sounds delicious.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Also, I've been meaning to ask you. I'm thinking about starting a book club. Are you interested?

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Nice. Nice. Okay, good. We got lots. Yeah. Lots of theme nights here, right? Yeah.

[C]

First, like, we've, like, kind of been wanting to get together and, you know, but nobody's really broken the ice. So here. Right here, we're doing it. So I said, would you be interested in coming over tomorrow for pizza night?

[A]

Pizza making night.

[C]

Pizza making night.

[A]

Yeah, pizza make. It could be pizza night. Pizza. Right. So if you say pizza night, that's usually you're gonna order pizza, and if you say pizza making night, we're actually gonn our hands in the dough and make the pizza together. Totally different evening.

[C]

Very different.

[A]

Yep. Right. So we want to know that. And then I said, wow, that sounds delicious. Also, I've been meaning to ask you. I'm thinking about starting a book club. Right. Are you interested? Nice.

[C]

So now we're kind of seeing. Wait a second, like, where we might end up being buds.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, being buddies outside of work. Yeah.

[A]

A little structure.

[C]

Little structure.

[A]

And there's so many different kinds of nights we could do. It makes me think of one. A friend of ours has an apple tree, and every year she does, like, an apple party where, like, the whole theme is you have to use this mechanism to go and grab the apples. And then, like, she'll cook an apple pie. Apple tart, apple everything. And it's all about that apple tree. It's fun. There's so much we could do that is fun. Yeah, it's really cool.

[C]

Yeah. So. But, guys, again, if you want to check out that episode, this was just. Last episode was 2504. How to blend your social bubbles in English. Perfect one.

[A]

To couple with this Perfect one. I love it.

[B]

Michelle, what's our takeaway for today?

[C]

Guys, don't be afraid to start making these connections. If you've realized that there's someone from work or someone that you see at different functions that you kind of click with, but you haven't actually asked to hang out, try using one of these. Right. Try having some sort of theme to give a little structure, take some of that pressure off, and, yeah, have fun.

[A]

It's true. Sometimes if you're feeling a little intimidated by just inviting someone over and you think, what am I gonna do? Do I cook instead? Come up with a theme. It also makes you more of a leader. Right. An organizer. And that's empowering. Right. And that gives something to talk about. It's an automatic conversation starter, too. When they come over. Yeah. Know what kind of pizza do you like or what do you what, what are your thoughts on pineapple pizza? That's always a hot topic, right?

[C]

That's a big one. Yeah.

[A]

So there you go.

[C]

All right.

[A]

Good stuff today, Michelle. Guys, hit follow. We got a lot of great stuff coming for you this fall and into the spring. All right.

[C]

All right. All right. Thanks for talking about this with me today, Lindsay. And guys, have fun at your next pizza making night.

[A]

Absolutely. Take care, Michelle.

[C]

All right, bye.

[A]

Thanks for listening. To all ears. English, Would you. Would you like to know your English level? Take our 2 minute quiz, go to allearsenglish.com fluencyscore and if you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything. See you next time.

[E]

And Doug, here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat helping people customize their car insurance. And hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[A]

Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us?

[E]

Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty.

[C]

Liberty. Liberty.

[E]

Liberty Savings. Very unwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company and affiliates. Excludes Massachusetts.