A (3:18)

That's so.

B (3:19)

And so to give a little background, today we're sharing tips to help you avoid a common m mistake in English Accidentally offending with the phrase of course, which can accidentally be a little rude. So what happened was someone asked one of our students if they had taken a photo, that they posted this beautiful photo. And they responded, yes, of course. And that inspired this episode. Cause I realized, oh, they don't realize that could come across as rude or critical of the question. Right. So I was sort of brainstorming other circumstances when you shouldn't say of course. And I meant to put in chat GPT when is it inappropriate to say yes, of course? But I sent that to 20 volleyball players and the responses were very funny. One person typed, when airport security asked if you packed anything flammable, it's like all they responded. And someone else said, when someone asks if you need help burying a body, this is really funny. So then I had to explain to them because they were like, why are you asking this?

A (4:14)

That is so funny. That's hilarious. So out of context. So it's so funny. Oh, this is really good stuff.

B (4:21)

So this is going to be a great episode, though, because of, you know, of course, usually it's very positive and adds enthusiasm to say yes, of course. But depending on the context, it could be rude. Right.

A (4:32)

This is going to be a great episode because we're going to get into a real nuance of English that I think our listeners are ready for. Because I think a common misunderstanding about of course is that people use it to answer yes in different contexts. And like, if you're offering to or you're providing help with someone, to some. To someone about something, yes, that leaves you open, that's friendly. But then when we use it in a slightly different answer, it does sound potentially a little snappy, don't you think?

B (5:00)

They're critical of the question. Snappy, maybe. So we're going to get into all of the meanings of course might have and whether they are positive or potentially could be rude. So be sure to hit follow. Guys, if you love episodes like this, you might be missing some because we have five new episodes every week.

A (5:19)

Yeah. Don't miss a single episode. Make sure we come up right in your episode Q. When you start, when you put your headphones in, when you start listening, you want allers English to pop right up. So go ahead and hit.

B (5:29)

And we often have bonuses that you're missing if you don't hit follow.

A (5:32)

Absolutely. Okay. Aubry. So what would be the first meaning of of course.

B (5:38)

Yeah, so the first one is what you were mentioning. It means, yes, I can do that if someone's asking for help. Right. So let's do a mini role play showing this.

A (5:47)

Can you help me organize these files?

B (5:50)

Yes, of course. Right, so this, you're saying, yes, I can do that. And you're being a little more enthusiastic about it. Because sometimes if you just say yes, the other person might be like, okay, is that yes, but I don't really want to? Or like, yes, of course.

A (6:03)

So just to clarify, there's no world in which that's rude, right? Aubry, this is not the rude use of of course.

B (6:10)

It's all about what you're responding to. If ever someone has asked for help, you can say, yes, of course. And it's never rude.

A (6:18)

Exactly. It's about what you're responding to and think about how that comes off. So let's go into number two, which is, yes, I would do that. The second use.

B (6:28)

Yeah. So if someone is asking if you would do something or maybe if you would join them somewhere, this is the second way we use this. We'll say, yes, of course, meaning yes, I would do that, or yes, I would like to do that.

A (6:40)

Okay, so what does this look like, Aubry?

B (6:42)

All right, here's a little role play. Want to come with me to a basketball game this week?

A (6:46)

Yes, of course.

B (6:48)

Yeah. So this is really enthusiastic. You're wanting to make it clear that you do really want to come. You're not saying yes out of politeness. Right. So it adds enthusiasm. Purely positive here.

A (7:00)

And there are other options. You know, you could say yes, absolutely. If you want to really show that you really want to go to that game. Maybe the person has courtside seats or something, you really want to go. So we don't have to say of course. Right. Keep that in mind.

B (7:12)

Yeah. And it's interesting how you don't have to say yes, of course. You can just say of course. You're like just to enthusiastically say yes. But if you're using it to answer other questions, you could sound like you're criticizing the question or the person asking and the essentially give offense.

A (7:30)

Give offense. You could be criticizing the assumption behind the question or what. Yeah, exactly. Let's see what this looks like, Aubry.

B (7:37)

Yeah.

A (7:37)

So for.

B (7:37)

As an example, let's say you take cookies to a party and someone asks if you made some them yourself, and you say, yes, of course. Right. What would that imply, Lindsay? If you asked me and I said.

A (7:49)

Yes, of course, this would imply that I'm thinking maybe you think I bought them, which is. Which could be.

B (7:56)

I'm probably offended that you think I bought them when I put all this work in to make them.

A (8:00)

Of course. I think part of what might be happening here is just direct translation from our native languages potentially. I think maybe, of course, the translation in French, Spanish, Italian might be more accepted more broadly.

B (8:13)

Yeah. It might not have this implication.

A (8:15)

Right.

B (8:15)

This is kind of a cultural connotation of this, you know, assumed offense. Right. So instead, if someone asks you that, you could be like, yes, I did. Oh, it. You know, it took me all day. Right. If you say, of course, they might be assuming you were offended by the question.

A (8:32)

Yeah, it's really. Wow, this is really, really touching.

B (8:35)

Let's do a little role play of what not to do. So here.

A (8:37)

Okay.

B (8:38)

I'm giving you, Lindsay, a tour of my new apartment. And you see a painting on the wall, start us out.

A (8:44)

All right. Here we go. Did you paint this?

B (8:46)

Of course.

A (8:50)

It's a little rude. It just. Yeah, it's.

B (8:53)

Yeah, it's really interesting how, like, I probably didn't mean to be rude. I just want to share that. Yes, I did. But there is this implied offense at the question that you're assuming maybe I didn't, when of course I did.

A (9:07)

Right. It's implied. Exactly. So this is where we might deploy our alternative options. Like we said earlier, saying instead of saying, of course in this context, saying, absolutely, I did. Yeah. Right. Or.

B (9:19)

Or if someone's asking you to do something, I'd be happy to. Lots of different options here. But, yeah, if someone asks, like, if you painted something, just saying like, yes, I did. And then often it's great to immediately give more information. Right. If you just stop there, yes, I did. Yeah. Trying to be strange, awkward.

A (9:36)

We don't love silence in American culture.

B (9:39)

Right. And usually a question like that, if someone asks, did you paint that? Did you make these cookies? They're trying to start a conversation. So if you can give more than just, yes, I did give some kind of detail about where you got the recipe from or when did you do the painting, then you're starting a fun conversation.

A (9:56)

Yeah. Maybe the inspiration behind the painting, the type of painting paint that you used. Oil paints, or depending on who you're talking to. Right. It's the beginning of a conversation.

B (10:06)

Yeah. And then we use, of course, one final way, which is to say, either you're welcome or like, no problem. And this also is not offensive, but it really has a very different meaning. So it's kind of crazy how many ways we use. Of course.

A (10:21)

It really is really interesting. So I would say to you, thanks for staying late to help clean up.

B (10:26)

Of course. So this Nice, Friendly. Yes. It's like. And you're. It's the same as saying no problem, no problem instead of just saying you're welcome. Which can kind of feel like I'm put out. If I say of course or no problem, I'm letting you know I'm happy to help.

A (10:41)

Yeah. And your tone of voice really matters there too. Of course. Right. You wanted to help. You're making that clear. Okay.

B (10:48)

Exactly Right. But other options are maybe don't mention it, or like I said, no problem. Or it's the least I could do. These other really polite ways to say your welcome. Really?

A (10:59)

Yes. Love it.

B (11:02)

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A (11:54)

All right, Aubrey, so we are going to do a role play and bring this whole thing to life here. So here ever you are moving into a new home and you're asking me or friend for help with the move. So this is a obligatory thing that friends do, especially when we're younger.

B (12:11)

Right. These days we would maybe just hire movers if we could. When we were younger, we were always asking help with friends to move.

A (12:17)

Yeah. Once it starts to involve, like your kids and their things. I think your friends don't want to move there. You know what I mean?

B (12:23)

Right? Or the older we get, we're like, my back can't handle.

A (12:26)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true too. Yeah, for sure.

B (12:28)

All right, I'll start us out here.

A (12:29)

Okay.

B (12:30)

Hey, do you think you could help me move in this weekend?

A (12:32)

Of course. What time should I come over?

B (12:34)

Thank you so much. Maybe noon on Saturday? I should have everything packed by then.

A (12:39)

Oh, I could help pack too, if you like.

B (12:41)

Really? That would be amazing.

A (12:43)

Of course, I'd love to. I remember you helped me move, so I definitely owe you one.

B (12:48)

Oh, I really appreciate it. It'll definitely go faster and be more fun.

A (12:52)

In fact, I don't know if I ever thanked you for helping me out that day. Thank you.

B (12:56)

Of course. Happy to help.

A (12:59)

Nice. So we didn't really have the offensive version in this, did we? Not really.

B (13:03)

I did not include the offensive version. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

A (13:07)

Right. But we could see how that could be slipped in maybe. Again, there's, like, a piece of pottery that I pull out when we're packing. Did you make this? Right. Of course. That would be rude because that's implying that you think that I think that it's not homemade or something.

B (13:21)

I love that I think that. But it's so true. It's all about, what was the question? What may be implied. Are you offended by the question?

A (13:30)

Exactly. Exactly. So let's go through this. So what's the first thing I said? Aubry.

B (13:34)

So I had asked if you could help me. You said, of course. What time should I be there? So this is that first meaning I can do that. I'm willing to do that.

A (13:43)

Great. And then I said, I could help pack too, if you like. You said, really? That would be amazing. And then I said, of course. I'd love to. We need to hear that enthusiasm in the voice there too.

B (13:55)

Right, Exactly. This is that second meaning I would do that. I'm willing to do that. Very similar, these first two. But you're right. The intonation, hearing in your voice, that willingness is a lot of it. Because you could be like, of course, questioningly, and then the enthusiasm's gone.

A (14:13)

Yeah. I was talking to my partner about this yesterday. It's very weird in life when you encounter someone whose gestures or tone of voice don't match the words they're saying. Like, we had a doctor's appointment the other day, and the doctor said, everything's fine. Right. But her tone of voice and, like, the gaps in what she was saying and her gestures didn't make us feel that way.

B (14:33)

Like, really? Because you don't sound like everything's fine.

A (14:35)

Right. It's weird because it does happen. It erodes trust. So we. It's really important to mirror what you're saying. The words with gestures, with body language, with tone of voice, at least in American English it is.

B (14:48)

Absolutely. Yes. Very important. Right. So we don't send mixed messages or erode trust, like you said. That's really.

A (14:54)

Yeah, totally.

B (14:55)

The last one here. I said you were thanking me for helping you when you moved. And I said, of course. Happy to help. And this just means you're welcome.

A (15:04)

Nice. Okay. Good stuff in this. And I just. Yeah. This is really a high level Episode today, Aubrey, Because I think many of our listeners may just be translating, of course, from their native language and not realizing that there's. There's a catch there. Right?

B (15:19)

Exactly. So again, you've heard this before, but don't translate directly from your first language. That always causes problems. But also, this is such a connection skill. Right. Being willing to help someone out is one of the best ways to build relationships. And if you think about. If someone asks you for help and you say, sure, I'm willing to help, that's not building that much of a connection. You're maybe making them feel like you're inconvenienced. And so, of course, can really be a great way to be enthusiastic about your willingness to help someone.

A (15:48)

Yeah. The word sure is so half hearted, isn't it? Yes. It's such a disappointment.

B (15:53)

Sure, sure. Unless you really give it a sure, it really is.

A (15:58)

So tone of voice and delivery really matter. Ultimately, connection matters. And it feels good to help out, like it really does. You know, if you can join a committee where you're helping people or just helping a friend, it'll give back to you. You know what I mean?

B (16:10)

Absolutely. And then just the other takeaway is if someone asks you if you cooked something or if you baked something, if you respond with of course, they may feel like you were offended by the question. They may feel like you're criticizing the question. So be careful with that. Right. Instead you could just say like, yeah, I did.

A (16:29)

Yeah, yeah, I have some other options for that particular scenario. Right. And then be ready to go into maybe what materials or ingredients you used.

B (16:37)

Right.

A (16:38)

Or why that thing inspired you. Or maybe it was your grandmother's recipe or something. I don't know exactly.

B (16:44)

It could be the start of a great, really fun conversation.

A (16:46)

Yeah, really good stuff today. All right, Aubry, great topic. Thanks for bringing this to the show and I'll see you soon. All right, awesome.

B (16:52)

Thanks. See you next time.

A (16:53)

Bye Bye. Thanks for listening. To all ears. English. Would you like to know your English level? Take our 2 minute quiz, go to allearsenglish.com fluencyscore and if you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything. See you next time.

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