AEE 2616: That’s on Me! Admitting Mistakes Without Making It Awkward

Summary

All Ears English Podcast – Episode 2616

"That’s on Me! Admitting Mistakes Without Making It Awkward"

Hosts: Lindsay McMahon & Michelle Kaplan
Date: May 13, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this episode, Lindsay and Michelle explore how to admit mistakes in American English using casual, natural phrases. The discussion focuses on the importance of taking responsibility in both personal and professional contexts, how doing so helps build trust and maintains connection, and how to avoid sounding awkward or overly serious when owning up to small errors. The hosts provide practical expressions, real-life scenarios, and role-plays, all with their signature friendly, conversational style.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Importance of Owning Mistakes

• Connection, not Perfection: The hosts emphasize that being able to admit mistakes calmly fosters stronger connections and helps avoid unnecessary conflicts.
  • Lindsay: “In life, it's good to own up to your mistakes and say something like, that's on me or that was my fault. It's a nice, natural, native way to say that.” (02:24)
  • Michelle: “When you take accountability calmly, you can show self-awareness. It's the opposite of defensiveness, which really kills the connection.” (03:43)

2. Key Phrases for Admitting Mistakes

• That’s on Me

  • Used to casually accept responsibility in both personal and professional contexts.
  • Professional Example:
    • “The report wasn’t ready for the meeting.”
    • “I thought the meeting was tomorrow. That’s on me.” (05:01)
  • Adds maturity and self-awareness to the conversation.

• My Bad

  • Very casual, often used jokingly or among friends and family.
  • More common among younger speakers or as a leftover from youth, but still persists for some adults.
    • Michelle: “This one is more for the kids. I might use it as a joke: ‘Oh, my bad.’” (06:22)
    • Lindsay: “I feel like I still say it, to be honest. Sometimes just being a teenager forever.” (06:51)

• I Messed Up

  • Can be used lightly for small issues or more seriously for bigger mistakes.
  • Serious Example:
    • “I forgot we went hiking and I forgot something really important like a compass... I messed up. I took a wrong turn back there.” (08:19 - 08:31)

3. Phrasing and Tone Matters

• Reasons/excuses given after taking blame can seem defensive, so hosts advise using them sparingly and only in a non-defensive tone.
  • Lindsay: “If you always find yourself giving a reason or with a defensive voice, that might be defeating the purpose of accepting the responsibility.” (05:37)

4. Casual versus Formal Usage

• "That’s on me" is suitable for both work and home; "my bad" is best avoided in formal settings.
• Explored generational use of slang and how some phrases persist while others fade.

5. Role Plays and Everyday Scenarios

• The hosts create real-life situations to demonstrate usage, from forgetting dinner reservations to not buying coffee.

• Memorable Example:

  • “Oops, my bad. I forgot to add it to the shopping list.” (12:12)
  • “Now that's on me. I kept hitting snooze on my alarm.” (12:23)

• Lindsay: “At least we’re both owning our mistakes, right?” (13:17)

• Michelle (playfully): “It’s funny because, even reading this now, I’m a little annoyed at you because I just…how could you do that? I’ll get over it.” (13:18)

6. The Relationship Impact of Admitting Mistakes

• Admitting errors quickly can de-escalate tension and keep relationships strong.
  • Lindsay: “The things you do right away when something goes wrong really matter because you can go in two directions. Things could escalate and there could be a full blowout fight…or someone could own it, and you maintain the connection.” (14:21)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Michelle: “When you take accountability calmly, you can show self-awareness. It's the opposite of defensiveness, which really kills the connection.” (03:43)
• Lindsay: “It sounds very mature when you say that.” (05:05)
• Michelle (joking about coffee): “If somebody does forget to buy the coffee, that's when things get serious.” (14:03)
• Lindsay: “I will never forget your coffee.” (14:47)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Content | |---------------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:07 | Lindsay demonstrates "that's on me" in a dinner reservation scenario | | 03:43 | Discussion of self-awareness and connection when admitting responsibility | | 05:01 | Example of using "that's on me" at work | | 06:14 | Introduction and discussion of "my bad" as an alternative phrase | | 08:09 | Example of "I messed up" in a serious scenario | | 10:04 | Analysis of the relaxed, calming tone these phrases add to conversations | | 11:42 | Tips on managing text replies and practical organizational strategies | | 12:04 | Full morning role-play using "my bad" and "that's on me" | | 14:03 | Episode takeaway: the importance of admitting mistakes to maintain and build connection | | 14:47 | Lighthearted banter about never forgetting coffee again |

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Takeaway Tips

• Use "that's on me" or "my bad" for casual accountability; "I messed up" suits both casual and serious contexts.
• Taking calm responsibility prevents defensiveness and helps relationships flourish.
• Phrasing and tone are key—be relaxed, confident, and avoid providing defensive explanations.
• Immediate, honest reactions can de-escalate issues and keep connections strong.

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Related Episode Recommendation

• Episode 2557: "Can't help it, how imperfection leads to connection" (13:40)
  • Explores how imperfections and honest admissions foster real connections in English communication.

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Summary by All Ears English Podcast Summarizer
For more resources, visit allearsenglish.com and remember: Connection, not perfection!

Transcript

[Michelle Kaplan]

This is an All Ears English podcast, episode 2616. That's on me. Admitting mistakes without making it awkward.

[Podcast Narrator]

Welcome to the All Ears English podcast, downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection, with your American hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York radio girl, coming to you from Colorado and New York City, usa. And to get your transcripts delivered by email every week, go to allearsenglish.com forward slash, subscribe.

[Advertisement Voice]

Are you someone who owns your mistakes?

[Lindsay McMahon]

This is a smart thing to do

[Podcast Narrator]

to stay connected and avoid a fight.

[Advertisement Voice]

Find out how to do it in

[Lindsay McMahon]

a native and natural way in English today.

[Advertisement Voice]

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[Michelle Kaplan]

Hey, Lindsay. How are you?

[Lindsay McMahon]

I'm feeling pretty good today, Michelle. Doing well? Yeah. What are we talking about on the show today?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Well, did you make dinner reservations for tonight?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, no, I forgot. That's on me.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, okay. We'll have to do takeout. Lindsay, do you feel like you make a lot of mistakes or. And do you usually admit to them? Do you admit to them?

[Lindsay McMahon]

I make a lot of mistakes, and, yeah, I usually try to admit to them. I mean, sometimes I play games and stuff with my partner and, you know, try. Try to. I don't know, maybe not always fully own up. Right. But in general, you know, with. In life, it's good to own up to your mistakes and. And say something like, that's on me or that was my fault. Right? Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Do you mean you're. You mean playing literal games? Like, you're actually playing games? I don't know.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Like, maybe it's like, oh, who. Who did. Like, whose fault was it really? You know, like, just sort of. That kind of.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I don't know. Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, I don't know anything. Know what you're talking about. For fun.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Just for fun.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Y.

[Michelle Kaplan]

So, yeah, we can talk about, you know, owning up to our mistakes, saying something is our fault, but in A casual way, which is what we're getting into today. So we can do this by saying phrases like that's on me. Which is what you used about the dinner reservation.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, exactly. I mean, essentially it means what, Michelle, what does it mean? What?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, it means it's my fault, I did it. Right?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. Something was my responsibility and I messed it up. It's not dramatic. It's a relaxed way of saying I made a mistake. It's a nice natural native way to say that.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Advertisement Voice]

Right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

And yeah, this is huge for connection because when you take accountability calmly. Right. You can show the self awareness and it's the opposite of defensiveness, which it really kills the. The connection again.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Exactly. If you're always defensive and blaming someone else in a serious way for something that's not good, that's never going to build a relationship. Right, guys, before we go any further in the episode, if you are not currently following the show, if you're an Apple podcast or Spotify, you do want to hit that follow button so that we drop right into your listening queue and you don't have to come after us and find our show. We'll drop into your queue every morning. Almost every morning, Michelle. Five days a week. Isn't that crazy?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. Lots of episodes. That's great. Lots of fun content and useful. Yeah. So, Lindsay, how would we use that's on Me?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, it's a casual phrase, like we said, but it can be used in both professional and personal situations. We've, we've always been saying over on Business English, our other podcast, we always say we don't become robots when we swipe our card and go into our workplace. Right. We stay, remain human beings. So that's why a lot of phrases are useful professionally and personally. So here's a professional example. The report wasn't ready for the meeting.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I thought the meeting was tomorrow. That's on me.

[Lindsay McMahon]

See, it sounds to me very mature.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

When you say that.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, I do. Like, I like that. It's self aware. Self aware or you said you'd call last night.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, that's on me. I dropped the ball. Okay. Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

And a lot of times when we say it, we also do give some sort of short reason. So like, like this. Did you lock the door when we left?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, no, that's on me. I got distracted by my phone.

[Michelle Kaplan]

So it's. Come on. I mean, gotta lock the door.

[Lindsay McMahon]

It's a slippery slope between. In this case, this doesn't feel like an excuse, but it could feel like an excuse. So just be Careful. When you give a reason after, if you always find yourself giving a reason or with a defensive voice.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Then that might be like defeating the purpose of accepting the responsibility.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, right, right. Like, oh, that's on me. Sorry. Like I was so busy. Or that's on me. I. I just. I couldn't remember all the things. You know, Something like that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Exactly.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. So. But what else can we use here? We're gonna do one that's even more casual.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Even more casual. This one's really casual. Maybe avoid this at work. It's pretty casual. My bad, my bad. Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. This one, I think was. Is more for the kids. I don't know if the kids.

[Lindsay McMahon]

For the kids.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Say it. I don't know. I. I don't say my bad. I might as a joke. Oh, my bad. Right. So it still exists, but it was.

[Lindsay McMahon]

It was trendy when we were kid. Like when we were. Exactly right is what you're saying.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, right, exactly. So I don't know if it's so much that our generation has moved it up or if the younger generation took it over. Probably not. Cuz they say things. I have no idea what they're talking about.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I feel like I still say it, to be honest. Sometimes just being a teenager forever. I don't know. There's some remnants of our teenagehood that we never drop as adults. Right. That we just carry on and it's a personal thing. Like maybe certain things you've carried on and I haven't. But.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, we should can wait, hold on. Lindsay, I'm gonna ask you to do an experiment because this could be a good future episode.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay.

[Michelle Kaplan]

If you use an expression in your daily life that you're like, oh, that's like kind of like from when I was younger. Like. Like a kid. Write it down and let me know because maybe we can do some research and I'll do the same thing. Maybe I'll ask Aubry too, and we can talk about some of the things that we realize have carried over into adulthood.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Is so good. That would be a brilliant episode, guys. Follow button if you love that idea. Yeah, we can see, you know, phrases that cross decades, right? They carry on for a lifetime because for some reason we identify with them. But may young kids don't use them anymore. So I doubt the 6, 7 crowd is using the my bad phrase, right? I don't think so.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, six, seven. Yeah. So, okay. How would this sound?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Hey, we're running late.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, my bad. I lost track of time.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Nice. Or the very literal I messed up okay,

[Michelle Kaplan]

so this one can be casual or stronger, depending on the situation. Right? So you can use it in a serious way. Like, I messed up.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I, you know, really messed up here, right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I forgot we went hiking and I forgot something really important like a compass. And now we're like in the middle of Arizona in the desert or something really bad. Really bad like this. I think we're lost.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, I messed up. I took a wrong turn back there.

[Lindsay McMahon]

You're still owning it, right? At least you're owning it, you know.

[Michelle Kaplan]

You're welcome.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay, nice.

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[Lindsay McMahon]

So what's the tone of the phrase, Michelle? These phrases?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, yeah, I would say relaxed, confident. It also. They also kind of lower the tension because they are a little more casual and showing. You're just saying. Yeah, like, I know. Like that's. That's. I did it.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

So in that way, it prevents arguments because it's not necessarily defensive or angry. So I think that it. It's. They're really useful. So can. Should we do a role play, Michelle?

[Lindsay McMahon]

How about the next one? How about the first role play here?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. Okay. So here we go. You forgot to feed the dog.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, my bad. I'll do it now. So that's a little thing. But yeah, the. The power of admitting you've done something is huge, Right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Exactly. Or we're late again.

[Lindsay McMahon]

That's on me. I need to work on my time management. Yeah, not good. Getting a Little bit more progressively high stakes here with these roleplays.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, exactly. Or for everyday mistakes. You know, these are great for everyday mistakes. Not necessarily huge apologies that have caused for something with serious harm. So something like this.

[Lindsay McMahon]

We're out of eggs.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, my bad. I didn't go grocery shopping. Yes.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Or you never replied to my text.

[Michelle Kaplan]

That's on me. I was busy and it slipped my mind.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, yeah. We were talking about this when we were recording last week. Is like a good method that I use is when I have a text that comes in, I mark it as unread to make sure I get back to people. Yeah. And you reply to people in your mind.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I. Yes. I. It's amaz. You know, maybe one day they'll have it where you can text with your mind. That would be really helpful to me. I would be texting everyone back right away. But when I have to actually use

[Lindsay McMahon]

my fingers, it's a lot of work. It's a lot of work for sure. All right, Role play time, Michelle. So here we're living together, and we're starting our morning at home, trying to make a cup of coffee. Trying.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Okay. All right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

You gotta have your coffee in the morning, right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, my gosh. All right. I think we're out of coffee again.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oops, my bad. I forgot to add it to the shopping list.

[Michelle Kaplan]

No, that's okay. Shall we grab a coffee on the way to work?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Well, you haven't showered yet, so I don't think we have time.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, you're right. Now that's on me. I keep. I kept hitting snooze on my alarm. Now, if you really did forget to add the call, I'm imagining if Dan did this and he forgot to get to the. I mean, I. I was kind of like. If you could hear it in my tone, like, I don't think I would just be like, oh, that's okay. And now we don't even have time to get coffee. I would probably be in an absol. Panic.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Maybe. Maybe. We're roommates and we just moved in together, and we're trying to maintain our, you know, back. But soon it'll go off the rails.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, but if there's no coffee. Yeah. Lindsay, really, you gotta get it together. Like, that's a number one on the shopping list.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, you gotta start your morning with coffee. It's the. The greatest thing. So. So here we go. So. But at least we're both owning our mistakes, right? So you said, I think we're out of coffee again. And I said, oops, My bad. I forgot to add it to the shopping list. Acting like I don't know you very well yet maybe, right? Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

It's funny because, like, even reading this now, I, for some reason, Lindsay, a little annoyed at you because I just like, how could you do that? I'm taking it too seriously. I'll get over it. Okay. And then you said, well, you haven't showered yet, so I don't think we have time. And I said, you're right. Now that's on me. I kept hitting snooze on my alarm. Yes.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I love that. I love that. Really good stuff. I mean, guys, there's another episode of Allers English to check out. It is 2557. Can't help it, how imperfection leads to connection. So this is again on the tone on the topic of mistakes and things you can't stop yourself from doing. Right? Sort of in the same vibe. Michelle, what is our takeaway for today?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, Well, I mean, being able to admit your mistakes builds trust in relationships. So phrases like that's on me. It's. It's a calm and confident way to do this. And we gave you lots of other ones to use. But if somebody does forget to buy the coffee, that's when things get serious. So that's all.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. I also think that the things you do right away when something goes wrong really matter because you can go in two directions. Things could escalate really quickly and there could be a full blowout fight, you know, or we don't want that. Or someone could be the responsible party, own it, and then you could maintain the connection. So this is huge, actually, for connection.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, that's right. All right, Lindsay. Well, I'm glad we talked about this today.

[Lindsay McMahon]

And I will never forget your coffee.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Don't do that. Don't do that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Now that I see the stakes, I mean, I will be careful.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Stakes are very high. All right, Lindsay, good talking to you. Now let's go drink some coffee. Talk to you. That's good.

[Lindsay McMahon]

All right, bye.

[Michelle Kaplan]

All right, bye.

[Podcast Narrator]

Thanks for listening to All Ears English. Would you like to know your English level? Take our two minute quiz. Go to all ears english.com forward/fluencyscore. And if you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything. See you next time.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Hablas espanol?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Spries to joy.

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[Michelle Kaplan]

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[Michelle Kaplan]

Thank you, thank you.