AEE: How to Round Out your Responses in English Conversations

Summary

All Ears English Podcast: How to Round Out Your Responses in English Conversations

Episode Release Date: April 12, 2025
Hosts: Lindsay McMahon and Michelle Kaplan

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Introduction

In this enlightening episode of the All Ears English Podcast, hosts Lindsay McMahon and Michelle Kaplan delve into the versatile usage of the word "then" in English conversations. Aimed at intermediate to advanced ESL learners, the episode provides valuable insights into how a seemingly small word can significantly enhance the flow and naturalness of dialogue.

Listener Question: Understanding "Then"

The episode kicks off with Lindsay announcing a listener question submitted by Julia, who inquires about the multifaceted roles of the word "then" in English. Julia observes that "then" is often used to express surprise, disbelief, or emphasis, as seen in examples like:

• "If you didn't take it, who did then?"
• "Well, then that's unexpected."
• "What do you want then?"

She seeks clarification on whether "then" primarily serves to emphasize or if it has other functions as well.

Exploring the Roles of "Then"

Michelle begins by highlighting that "then" is frequently used to ensure responses are directly tied to preceding statements, thereby fostering better conversational connections. Lindsay concurs, noting that "then" adds completeness and sometimes a touch of drama to responses.

Notable Quote:
Michelle Kaplan [02:20]: "It's one of those... a common word in the English language. We don't have time in one episode to cover all the uses of it."

"Then" as a Connector for Emphasis and Drama

The hosts explore how "then" can serve to emphasize a point or add a dramatic flair to a conversation. For instance, in the sentence, "If you didn't take it, who did then?" the word "then" intensifies the question, making it more impactful than simply asking, "Who did?"

Notable Quote:
Lindsay McMahon [04:07]: "It makes it a little bit more complete. You could have left it the other way, too, but we say things in different ways."

"Then" Meaning "In That Case"

A significant portion of the discussion centers around "then" meaning "in that case." This interpretation is pivotal for most conversational scenarios where "then" links responses to specific conditions or events.

Examples Discussed:

1. Conditional Planning:

   • Michelle [12:24]: "What do you want then?"
     Here, "then" implies "given the current situation."

2. Changing Plans:

   • Lindsay [12:13]: "Sometimes it's just used in that relaxed way... see you tomorrow then."

Notable Quote:
Michelle Kaplan [05:05]: "It means in that case, you could say, 'If you didn't take it, who did?'"

Role Play: Planning a Surprise Party

To illustrate the practical application of "then," Lindsay and Michelle engage in a role-play scenario where they plan a surprise party. This exercise demonstrates how "then" can smoothly transition between ideas and responses.

Role Play Highlights:

• Idea Introduction:
  Lindsay: "We could tell her she has a meeting with her boss."
  Michelle [14:16]: "Okay, but isn't her boss away? How would that help us then?"

• Refining the Idea:
  Michelle: "We can just tell her I need help moving then."
  Lindsay: "Well, then I'm glad you like it."

This exchange showcases how "then" serves as an off-ramp, making the conversation flow more naturally and less abruptly.

Notable Quote:
Michelle Kaplan [15:35]: "It's like we're downshifting from fifth gear into fourth gear getting off the freeway."

Addressing Different Contexts of "Then"

While the primary focus is on "then" meaning "in that case," the hosts briefly touch upon its time-related use, acknowledging that context determines its interpretation. However, they advise listeners to prioritize the conditional usage to cover the majority of conversational scenarios.

Notable Quote:
Lindsay McMahon [13:03]: "If he doesn't show up, what will we do then? That's about time."

Takeaways and Practical Tips

The episode concludes with Lindsay and Michelle emphasizing the importance of using "then" to create connections in conversations. They recommend focusing on the "in that case" meaning initially to avoid overwhelm and gradually incorporating other uses as learners become more comfortable.

Key Recommendations:

• Start Simple:
  Focus on using "then" to mean "in that case" in various scenarios.

• Practice Rounds:
  Engage in role-plays or real-life conversations where "then" naturally fits.

• Build Gradually:
  Once comfortable, explore its other uses like adding emphasis or drama.

Notable Quote:
Lindsay McMahon [13:42]: "If you're going to pick up one thing from the episode and walk away without overwhelming yourself, start with that."

Conclusion

This episode of the All Ears English Podcast underscores the subtle yet powerful role that the word "then" plays in English conversations. By understanding and practicing its various uses, learners can enhance their conversational skills, making interactions smoother and more natural. The hosts encourage listeners to prioritize connection over perfection, fostering a more engaging and effective communication style.

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Additional Resources:

• Recommended Episode:
  Episode 2380: Keep English Straight with These Idioms
  Dive deeper into idiomatic expressions to further elevate your English proficiency.

• Interactive Practice:
  Take the All Ears English Fluency Score Quiz to assess your English level and tailor your learning journey accordingly.

Notable Quote:
Michelle Kaplan [17:08]: "If you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything."

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By focusing on the nuanced use of "then," this episode provides learners with practical tools to make their English conversations more connected and fluid, embodying the podcast's motto: Connection NOT Perfection.

Transcript

[Lindsay McMahon]

This is an All Ears English Podcast how to round out your responses in English conversations.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection, with your American hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York Radio girl coming to you from Colorado and New York City, usa. And to get your transcripts delivered by email every week, go to allearsenglish.com forward/subscribe. A major key to connection is making sure people know that you're responding directly to what they say today.

Find out how to use the word then to do exactly this for better English conversations.

[N/A]

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[Michelle Kaplan]

Hello Michelle, how are you?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Good, good. Lindsay. Lindsay, if we're all set up, what should we do then? Start recording? Start the episode?

[Michelle Kaplan]

I guess we should just get started, Michelle. Okay, dive right into it.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Let's get started then. So guys, you may have noticed Lindsay and I using the word then a lot just at the beginning of this episode. Today we are going to answer a question from our listener Julia about this word that it's it's funny. I love these episodes where they're about a teeny tiny word and there's so much to it and there's a lot we can talk about. So this is such a good question. I'm excited.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, it's a teeny tiny word, but it's everywhere in English all the time, constantly.

[Lindsay McMahon]

It's one of those. Yep.

[Michelle Kaplan]

So this is the kind of episode that's going to get our listeners thinking after they listen today. Oh, let's see. All the different places I can find this word and how can I start to use it to to link together ideas to feel more natural in English.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

What should our listeners do before we read our question of the day from Julia?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Please Hit the follow button because we don't want you to miss anything from us. Sometimes I have it where I. If there's a podcast I listen to and I don't follow it, then I realize, oh, wait, I missed all these episodes. Right. And so this way, it's just so much easier if you. If you like a podcast, follow it. And then I just get these little alerts, and it's great.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, good stuff. So hit that follow button right now, guys. Okay, Michelle. So today's question comes from Julia. Shall I read the question?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Sure.

[Michelle Kaplan]

All right. So Julia says, hi, how are you doing? I'm Julia, and I really enjoy the podcast. Well, thank you, Julia.

[Lindsay McMahon]

That's great to know.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I've noticed that then is sometimes used to express surprise, disbelief, or emphasis, such as, if you didn't take it, who did then? Or, well, then that's unexpected. Or what do you want then? How does then function in these cases? Is it mainly for emphasis or does it have another role? I'd love to hear your thoughts. Thank you. Best, Julia. Excellent.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, great question. This is going to help a lot of people, Julia, So thank you for bringing this to our attention. So this is. Yeah. An important focus of the word then. So let's start out by going through Julia's examples. Okay, so if you didn't take it, who did? Then? What is the then doing? Why? Could we have just said who did?

[Michelle Kaplan]

In this case? It means in that case, you could say, if you didn't take it, who did? And sometimes people do say that, but this kind of rounds it out, I would say, a bit more. It makes it more emphatic, wouldn't you say, Michelle?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, I would say who did in that case. Right. It's just. Yeah, I like that. I think it rounds it out. It makes it a little bit more complete. You could have left it the other way, too, but we say things in different ways. Right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. And I think it also makes it a little bit more dramatic. So we said emphatic, but also maybe dramatic.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Dramatic. All the rhyming words.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. There are times in life when we want to be dramatic. Right. If you didn't take it, who did? Then who did? You bring. Bring the drama. Don't bring it all the time, but bring it once in a while.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Exactly.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

But once in a while. Right. So then the other example was. Well, then that's unexpected.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Okay. And again, this comes back to in. I'm seeing a pattern developing here, Michelle. Well, in that case.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

So it comes back to in these examples, in that Case related to what you just said here.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right, exactly. Or what about this? What do you want then? So this one to me is, it's like, yeah, in that case, in light of this, whatever is happening, what do you want then? Yeah, yeah, same idea.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, same idea. And of course, these, this is always going to be spoken in response to what someone said to us. Right. Oh, there's a breakup happening. Right. And I don't know, some kind of drama with the end of a relationship. And what do you want then? This person says, oh, you don't make me happy. What do you want then? Right, yes, so just emphasize that we wouldn't have the then unless someone were saying something to us.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right, right. It's rounding out. It's not, it doesn't, it's not just an isolation. It's a full response, kind of connect to something else. Yeah, very good point. And yeah, the question also was, does it show surprise and disbelief?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Good question. What do you think, Michelle?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, so maybe, but not always. But it does emphasize what you're saying. So, yeah, Julie mentioned that she's noticed that it shows surprise, disbelief or emphasis. So, yeah, let's, let's kind of talk about that. So not always. I mean, this is not about time, right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yes, there are a lot of talking.

[Lindsay McMahon]

About it in a different context.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, yeah, there are a lot of different ways to use then, which I think we're going to talk about maybe another day. And we have before on the show then is such a, a common word in the English language. We don't have time in one episode to cover all the uses of it. Right, Michelle?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, it's very, very common. So. But let's give some more examples. So I'll see you tomorrow then. Okay. Sometimes it's just used in that relaxed way. Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. This is really, really a marker of kind of native speaking here. How we can, we can level up our, our English now, when we say it this way, it's not adding the layer of drama. Right. But it is rounding it out in a sense that it's responding to what someone has said, which is, we're going to see each other again soon, if that makes right again.

[Lindsay McMahon]

And I think that, to me, the best when I think of what this word actually means. If you boil it down, it's in that case, in light of the.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

So that connects to something else. It's, it's. That's what it means in my, in my mind.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. And to throw a curveball in here, sometimes people say this, and I've Heard myself do this. It's incredibly natural we say it not in response to what someone said. For example, I might get on the phone if you and I were meeting. I. Okay, next week I'm going to a conference in California. I might, I might say to someone, so where are you from then?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Sometimes it's just. You just put it there.

[Michelle Kaplan]

You just put it there. And it's not like there's anything that really came before that we've introduced ourselves. And that is a very natural. And, and what you're trying to do is make that question feel more natural and more smooth, in a sense.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right. It's. It's, it's less abrupt sounding. It kind of, I don't know, it's like you're coming down smoothly from. You're on the off ramps. Right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yes, really interesting. But let's continue with these more direct examples and maybe we'll come back to that example just to throw a curveball in case our listeners have heard native speakers say that then at the end and don't know what it's connected to.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right? Yeah. And then Julia also had talked about, well then. So, yeah, we have. Well then, don't you look nice? And yeah, this is. I think this, well, then is almost more of a chunk. I mean, it's more about surprise. Well, then let's blah, blah, blah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, Yeah, I agree. I agree. You think it's about surprise. Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Well, then, not always in this situ. In this. In this example, but it could always be, well, then I think we should change what we're doing. Right?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yes, I like that. And then we have a quote here. If he doesn't show up, what will we do then? Well, this is more about time. Right. What will we do at that time?

[Lindsay McMahon]

To me, it's funny because I could see it in that way, but I wasn't thinking about it in time. I was still thinking about if. What will we do in that event?

[Michelle Kaplan]

In that case, Mario.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Not necessarily what will we do? Exactly.

[Michelle Kaplan]

But that's really interesting.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right? It's a. Yeah, it still serves kind of the same function.

[Michelle Kaplan]

It just matters what emphasis, what nation you use. Right. If he doesn't show up, what will we. What will we do then? That's about time. If he doesn't show up, what will we do then? That's about the response in that case. Right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Interesting. Right. Woo.

[Michelle Kaplan]

This is.

[Lindsay McMahon]

My brain is going in so many different directions.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yes. What about another example, Michelle?

[Lindsay McMahon]

All right. This one is similar. This is one is very similar to what I already gave. So the Restaurant says they may not have any tables. So where will we eat then?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, I, I think that one is clearly that one's a response. In that case, if that happens, where will we eat? Right.

Love it.

This is such a good question from Julia. We're going to take a quick break and come back and keep answering this question.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yes.

[Michelle Kaplan]

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Foreign Michelle, we are back now. When would we see ourselves throwing in then?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. Yeah, right. So as we mentioned here, some of the things we've kind of already talked about, so changing plans, reviewing plans, kind of planning for another maybe if you need to plan something, a backup plan, what will we do then? What will if, if that doesn't work, what will we do then? Or ending conversations. So like, see you tomorrow then.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, Exactly. You know, in that case, in the case that we will come together tomorrow, I'll see you tomorrow then, right? Surprise. When you're stating surprise. Well then I never knew xyz right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Or saying in that case or in that scenario if that happens. And to me that's the. For me, I think that's the biggest one that I'd love our listeners to walk away with is thinking of it in, in that case because we're talking about a lot here and might be a little bit intimidating here to hear all of this because there's a lot of different situations. So for in our opinion, try thinking of it of in that Case in that event, in that scenario and see how you can put it on there. If you're going to pick up one thing from the episode and walk away without overwhelming yourself, start with that.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, I glad you said that, Michelle. That's so true. That's going to cover probably 80% of the scenarios with the use of then in, in this way not to talk about time or other things. Right. So in that case is what we're trying to say here. Let's see this in a role play, Michelle, shall we?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Let's do it. Here we go. All right. So we are friends planning for our friend surprise party.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Okay, here we go.

[Lindsay McMahon]

All right. Okay. So we will tell her what?

[Michelle Kaplan]

That she has a meeting with her boss.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay. But isn't her boss away? How would that help us then?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, good point. We can just tell her I need help moving then.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, good idea.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Well, then I'm glad you like it. Okay. All right, nice. So again, in any, in the, in that case. Right. Using this an as an example to mean in that case. So first you said, well, I said that we could tell her that she has a meeting with her boss. And you said, okay, but isn't her boss away? How would that help us then? And then here then means in that case, in response to what, Michelle?

[Lindsay McMahon]

In response to you saying that we could say she has a meeting with the boss.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Because her boss is away.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Because her boss is away. Right. So you're kind of responding to yourself. You've said, yeah, yes way. So how would that help us in that case, the case that her boss is away.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right. And again, I could have just said, how will that help us? But again, I, I think of this as an off ramp. I just think of it as a way to smooth it out.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Just adding it on. I don't need it. But it just does make it sound a little bit more gentle.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I don't know, is it like we're downshifting from fifth gear into fourth gear getting off the freeway? Nice.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Slow down.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Ye. I love it. Yeah, so it's, it's an off ramp. It's a response. It's rounding it out. It's really responding. Because we've talked about on this show that a key marker of connection is actually responding to what the person has said. In this case, you responded to yourself. Right?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right. Yeah, I'm talking to myself. Okay. Then you said, oh, good point. We can just tell her I need help moving then. So you're making another suggestion. You're saying in light of what you.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Said in light of is another way to say it. Yep, exactly Right. And then you said, oh, good idea. And now I brought out the, the different, the more dramatic way by saying what?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Well, then I'm glad you like it. And well, then I don't want to, I don't want to introduce another context necessarily, but just really quickly, sometimes you might hear, well, then I'm leaving. Right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. It's a very different use here of then. Right. But we talked about it earlier in the episodes. We just wanted to show you an example here. Good. Michelle, is there another episode our listeners should check out?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. Guys, head on over to episode 2380. That was keep English straight with these idioms.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Very nice. And guys, don't forget to hit that follow button on the show. And I think for our takeaway today, Michelle, it comes back to connection. Like I said, as much as you can, let the person know you've heard them and you are responding to them. Because these days people don't listen.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

They don't always listen. And so people like to make sure to know that you're listening to them. Right?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Very important. And again, if you're walking, if you're, if you are overwhelmed at all by the information you learned today, try it in pieces. I would say first, just go with that in light of. Yeah, right, I would go with that and try it first in that way, like using it in that case. And then, and then you can move on to some of these other examples. But yeah, definitely give this a try. It's very useful. It's a. It, it sounds nice. When you add, then it sounds nice.

[Michelle Kaplan]

We want to sound nice. I love it.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, sounds nice. All right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

All right. Sounds good. Michelle, I'll see you in the next episode. You take care.

[Lindsay McMahon]

All right, you too. Bye.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Bye.

Thanks for listening.

To all ears. English.

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