AEE: I'll Give You That! How to Concede to Connect in English

Summary

Podcast Summary: All Ears English – "I'll Give You That! How to Concede to Connect in English"

Hosts: Lindsay McMahon & Michelle Kaplan
Date: December 12, 2025
Episode Focus: How to make social connections by conceding points in conversation—even when you disagree—using natural English phrases.

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Episode Overview

In this episode, Lindsay and Michelle dive into the subtle art of conceding a point during conversation to foster better connections. Emphasizing their "Connection NOT Perfection" philosophy, they demonstrate how acknowledging others' perspectives—be it through lighthearted agreements or begrudging admissions—can make social interactions smoother and more enjoyable. Through multiple role plays, real-life anecdotes, and practical vocabulary, they coach listeners on essential phrases to use when you want to maintain rapport, even when you don’t fully agree.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Why Making Concessions Matters for Connection

• Opening Anecdote: Lindsay jokes about Times Square being her favorite New York neighborhood, prompting Michelle to gently push back, leading to a discussion on how natives avoid Times Square.
  [02:33 - 03:15]

• It’s natural to disagree at times, but outright contradiction or silence can create awkwardness or tension.

• Finding ways to "give a little" keeps the vibe positive, helps avoid confrontation, and maintains social harmony.

• Social connection thrives when we don’t insist on being right all the time.

  “The worst thing for connection is just not to respond. Because, I mean, I've been around people like that that just kind of don't respond when you say things. They just stay quiet. It's the most awkward thing in the world.”
  — Lindsay McMahon [07:49]

Essential English Phrases for Conceding

1. "I will say that..."

[05:29 - 06:21]

• Used to gently highlight a positive or concede a small point, even if you overall disagree.

  • Example Role Play:
    • Michelle: “I think McDonald's is the best restaurant.”
    • Lindsay: “Oh. I mean, they do have delicious French fries, I will say that.”
      [06:36 - 06:45]

2. "I'll give you that."

[09:56 - 10:55]

• Expresses acknowledgment of a valid point, offering goodwill in conversation.

  • Example Role Play:
    • Michelle: “Charades is always a good idea for a house party.”
    • Lindsay: “It does keep everyone engaged, I'll give you that.”

3. "I have to admit"

[11:23 - 11:58]

• Friendly way to recognize someone’s point, even reluctantly.

  • Example Role Play:
    • Lindsay: “Ooh, they do have good coffee, I have to admit. Sure. Thanks.”
    • Michelle: “You do have to deal with city traffic, I have to admit, but my commute is no picnic either.”

4. "You've got a point (there)"

[14:56 - 15:20]

• Directly acknowledges the validity of the other's argument or concern.

  • Example Role Play:
    • Michelle: “We should wait to call her until tomorrow.”
    • Lindsay: “All right, you've got a point there. She does go to sleep early.”

The Social Value of Conceding

• Using these phrases shows flexibility and empathy, signaling that you care about the relationship more than being "right."

• Conceding does not mean you fully agree—it’s about keeping positive energy and respecting others’ opinions.

  “Oh, my gosh. Yeah. No one wants to talk to the person that has to hammer home their opinion on everything and has to disagree with everyone on everything.”
  — Lindsay McMahon [12:16]

• Real-life pitfalls: Lindsay describes a family member who used to argue every point, creating tension and exhausting conversations.

• Michelle points out that if you stay quiet or only contradict, you don’t build connection: “You gotta say something." [19:39]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Negotiating preferences:

  “I mean, I will say the views are beautiful.”
  — Michelle Kaplan [16:26]

• Illustrating connection over perfection:

  “We're finding the middle space here, which will help you build your relationship with this person. Really good.”
  — Lindsay McMahon [19:58]

• On social awkwardness:

  “Did you hear me? Like, are we okay?... Is this thing on?”
  — Lindsay & Michelle joking about unresponsive listeners [08:03 - 08:05]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:33] – Times Square as a conversation starter; when to concede politely
• [03:52] – Thanksgiving pie story and how to "play along" for social harmony
• [05:29] – Introduction of the phrase: “I will say that...”
• [06:36] – Role play: McDonald's French fries
• [07:49] – The dangers of staying silent in a conversation
• [10:05] – Introducing “I'll give you that” with role play on charades
• [11:23] – Using “I have to admit” in friendly debate
• [14:56] – Introducing “You've got a point (there)” in planning a phone call
• [15:51] – Integrated role play: Planning a NYC trip using all concession phrases
• [19:07] – Emphasizing the episode’s connection lesson: Say something positive to avoid shutting down a conversation

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Takeaways for ESL Learners

• Connection, not perfection: The focus is on maintaining a friendly, open conversation rather than winning arguments or always being correct.
• When you disagree or are indifferent, try using:
  • “I will say that...”
  • “I’ll give you that.”
  • “I have to admit...”
  • “You’ve got a point (there).”
• Practice these in role plays to sound more natural and build relationships in English-speaking contexts.
• Always respond—even with something small—rather than staying silent or shutting others down.

---

Closing Thoughts

Michelle and Lindsay wrap up by reinforcing the value of conceding small points, not just for language learners but for anyone seeking to connect across cultures or personalities. Staying flexible, positive, and attentive in conversations is more likely to win friends and influence people than always being “right.”

“You gotta say something. Don't just stare blankly or don't look away and say nothing. That will kill connection probably faster than totally shutting down the idea, right?”
— Lindsay McMahon [19:39]

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For more practical English tips and role play-driven lessons, subscribe to All Ears English and put these connection-building skills into daily practice!

Transcript

[Michelle Kaplan]

This is an All Ears English podcast, I'll give you that. How to Concede to Connect in English.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection with your American hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York radio girl coming to you.

[Lindsay McMahon]

From Colorado and New York City, usa.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

And to get your transcripts delivered by email every week, go to allearsenglish.com subscribe when someone says something that you disagree with, do you stay quiet or do you shut down their idea? Don't do either of these things. If you want connection in life today, find out how to begrudgingly make a concession in English.

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[Michelle Kaplan]

Hey Lindsay, how are you?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Hey Michelle, I'm doing great today. What are we getting into in the show today?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Well, what's your favorite neighborhood in New York City?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, definitely Times Square, hands down, no question.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh wow. I mean, yeah, there is a lot of action there. I will say that I get the.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Sense you maybe don't agree with me.

[Michelle Kaplan]

But I, you know, I'm trying to be nice. Lindsay, is that really your favorite neighborhood in New York?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh no, no, Michelle, it's not. It's probably my least favorite neighborhood. I almost never went there. Most locals do not go to Times Square. So yeah, if you want to seal the see the real New York. I mean, everyone should probably go to Times Square as a tourist just to see it. Of course. But then if you want to see New York, don't go to Times Square, go to Union Square.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

Go downtown, go to Central Park.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right Michelle?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. So today we're this is going to be a lot of fun. We're going to Talk about how to concede a point begrudgingly. Right? Kind of like you don't agree with it or you're just saying, okay, fine, but you want to be optimistic and kind of just let a point go to the person who's expressed something. So we're going to explain more what we mean in just a second. But guys, if you haven't already, please hit the follow button wherever you're listening to Allers English or hit subscribe for YouTube. Never miss anything from us.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, I could see this coming up a lot. When you think someone has bad taste and. But you don't want to, you can't really say that. Like a few Thanksgivings ago, we went to my, my brother's house and my sister in law has this family tradition, this is for Thanksgiving, that she thinks that her grandmother's pies are like the best. And so I was so excited for this pie. She had talked it up, you know, all day and the pie was honestly nothing special. And I had to kind of play along, you know, and this is kind of the vibe that we're getting into.

[Michelle Kaplan]

What kind of pie was it?

[Lindsay McMahon]

It was a pumpkin pie, I think. And it was just like, ugh, what are we even, like, what, what have we been so excited about all day? But I think for her it was just, it was just the more the nostalgic aspect of her grandmother's pie, you know.

[Sponsor Voice 1]

Of course.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, yeah. So that's so funny. So, yeah, this came out, this idea came out from an earlier episode. We can give you the number later so that you can listen. But in this episode, Lindsay and I were. Do you remember Lindsay? We were talking about Atlantic City and you were like, really? Atlantic City? And I said, I mean, they do have a nice boardwalk. I will say that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

So here I was actually kind of defending myself or something that doesn't have a great reputation and highlighting the positive. So this can, this kind of skill, it can be used in multiple ways. So we're going to talk about more ways to do this and what it does for connection and what it means. Okay.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, I love this. I love this topic. Good stuff. Let's get into it. Michelle, where do we start here?

[Michelle Kaplan]

All right, so the first thing you could say, and this is what we used, I believe is, I mean, dot, dot. I will say that. You don't have to say, I mean, but it's pretty common, right? So, Lindsay, would you say this? I will say that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right, Yeah, I would. Yeah, exactly. It's kind of like you, it's another way of saying, I will concede that you're making a bit of a concession here.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, exactly. So this can be used to highlight the positive. Right. Concede a point. So again, about Atlantic City, I'm saying I was the one that said I was in Atlantic City. And then I'm saying, well, there is a positive point. I will say that. Right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

But it can also be used to concede the point or to me, and this is important for con. You know, like maintaining the connection. So instead of me saying, lindsay, really? Times Square, what's wrong with you?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right, right. We don't want to do that as human beings. We don't want to. Yeah. We want to connect. We want to find the thing that we can agree with. Agree on, you know?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yes. So. Yes. So let's show how this may sound in a couple role plays.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I think McDonald's is the best restaurant.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh. I mean, they do have delicious French fries. I will say that.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Okay. Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I mean. Yeah. So trying to find a common point of agreement here. Right. Even if it's not.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, right, exactly. Or here's another one.

[Lindsay McMahon]

All right. It's so stressful to travel during Thanksgiving.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I get it. I wouldn't want to be stuck at the airport. Then I will say that. So this one isn't necessarily, like, I think there's something wrong with you for your opinion.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I'm just, you know, just kind of saying I. Yeah, you're right. And I'm going to highlight this point about it.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. Maybe here you don't necessarily have, like, a story or you don't travel on Thanksgiving, so you don't really have anything to say or something. Right. But you want to say something. Right. You want to write something.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, Right, exactly. So this may be that you totally disagree, or maybe you're just trying to relate to a different point or like Lindsay said, I think that's really a good point here, is just, oh, maybe you don't have very strongly strong feelings about something, but you're, you know, want to kind of support the person or say, yeah, sure, yeah, you gotta say something.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I mean, the worst thing for connection is just not to respond. Because, I mean, I've been around people like that that just kind of don't respond when you say things. They just stay quiet. It's the most awkward thing in the world. It's like, did you hear me? Like, are we okay?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Is this thing on? Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. You get into, like, a spiral of confidence. It's like, what's happening? If I Am I going crazy? You know? Right. So we need to say something to build connection. All right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Exactly. So after the break, Lindsay, we can talk about more ways that we could do this.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah.

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[Lindsay McMahon]

All right, Michelle, let's look for some more ways to connect then, in that case. So really good stuff here. Good vocabulary. First one is. I'll give you that.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, Right. That's basically another way of saying, I concede this point to you. Like, you win on this kind of. Right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yep, exactly. So let's see how this looks. So here we go. Charades is always a good idea for a house party.

[Michelle Kaplan]

It does keep everyone engaged, I'll give you that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. So you're maybe not a big charades fan. I don't think I am either. You have to say something because you want to keep the vibe going. You want to keep things positive.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, right, right. I'm not gonna say, you know, I here. It doesn't sound like I want to say, oh, yeah, I love charades, too. It's my favorite, but I'm finding I'm pulling out a positive piece. Yes. Or here's another one. Sprouted bread is my favorite.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I don't love it, but it is healthy. I'll give you that. Right. So you gotta find something you can agree on.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right. Do you eat. What kind of bread do you.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I don't really know what sprouted bread is.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, it's like. I think it's like a Ezekiel bread and stuff like that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay. I don't remember what that tastes like, but I don't. I'm sure I've tried it, but I don't.

[Michelle Kaplan]

It tastes like bread.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Sourdough. Sourdough bread.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Sourdough bread with everything, so. Or brioche. Oh, brioche. Brioche is so good. It's so bad for you. It's so good. Yeah. What else, Michelle? Is there another.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, here's another one. Is. I have to admit. Okay. Okay. So here we go. I know you don't like the donut shop down the street, but I'm getting coffee from there if you want any.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Ooh, they do have good coffee, I have to admit. Sure. Thanks. Yeah. So, yeah, it just keeps the.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

You know, keeps things running smoothly socially.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right. Let's try another. My commute is way worse than yours.

[Michelle Kaplan]

You do have to deal with city traffic, I have to admit, but my commute is no picnic either.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yes. You're sticking up for yourself a little bit here, right? Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah. So, you know, you can see this can also introduce or be used to share your point. Right. Just in a way that shows that you're open and willing to concede certain things. So that's really important for connection.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, my gosh. Yeah. No one wants to talk to the person that has to hammer home their opinion on everything and has to disagree with everyone on everything. I know that person, actually.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right. You do? You know that person?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Well, I've been around people like that in the past, and it's just like. It's exhausting.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right? It's exhausting.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right.

[Michelle Kaplan]

You're just always kind of on the defense. Then you're like, oh, God, I always have to defend how I feel about everything or this person is judging or criticizing me.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. Oh, my gosh. I had a family member that used to do this. It used to drive my mom nuts, because my mom was a child development specialist, like a child psychologist. And my uncle used to pick apart her expertise, and it would drive her insane. Especially that when someone kind of picks apart, like, what you're an expert in, like, PhD expert, you know, and she would go crazy. So I think if she could have just done this, it would have been easier on her mind, you know?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right, right. And you can have a kind of little chuckle to yourself about It. Yeah, sure. That's great. Yeah.

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[Michelle Kaplan]

We have one more. Lindsay, what is this one?

[Lindsay McMahon]

You've got a point there. Right? You've got a point there. Okay, so this one you can also.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Just say you've got a point. It's either add the there or don't.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, let's do a demo. We should wait to call her until tomorrow.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Why? I want to call, but it's too late. All right, you've got a point there. She does go to sleep early.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Nice. All right, Michelle, any favorites here?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Which one is my favorite? I think I. I like. I will say that. Yeah, I'll give you that. I think those are my favorites. What do you think?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, same. I like. I'll give you that. It sounds kind of cool to me.

[Michelle Kaplan]

So I'll give you that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

That. Yeah.

[Michelle Kaplan]

All right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Role play has a lot of. This episode has a lot of role plays, but our listeners love role plays. It's, you know, one of our favorite things we do here in allers English.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

So let's do one more and bring them all together.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Bring it home. All right, here we go. So we are planning a trip to New York City.

[Lindsay McMahon]

All right, here we go.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Okay, so we should definitely visit Zabars on the upper west side. I love their coffee H. They do.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Have amazing coffee, I have to admit.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

We also have to see a Broadway show.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Yeah, but it may be too expensive.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, you've got a point there. But it would be so worth it.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I'll think about it. TKTS does have some pretty good discounts, I'll give you that.

[Lindsay McMahon]

And we have to visit the High Line.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I've been there so many times.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

I know, but it's my favorite place.

[Michelle Kaplan]

I mean, I will say the views are beautiful.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Exactly. Yeah. It sounds like maybe I'm the tourist here and you're a local or something. Right? Like, you used to live in New York, maybe. And, yeah, I just want to do all these touristy things. And you're like, oh, I've done that before, but I'll give. You know.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Right.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

You're giving some concessions here.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Did you ever go to Zay Bars in New York?

[Lindsay McMahon]

No.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

Zay Bars. I. I never did.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, it's great.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Is it a coffee shop or is it a restaurant?

[Michelle Kaplan]

It's. They have coffee and they also have, like, a little restaurant, I think. But it's. It's actually a grocery store, but it's just kind of an iconic. Okay, you know, been around forever kind of place, so. Next.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Got it. Is it only on the Upper west side? Just on the Upper west side, yeah. Yeah, I didn't go there very much. Yeah, I stayed downtown pretty much.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Okay, let's go. All right, here we go. So I said, I love their coffee, and you said, they do have amazing coffee, I have to admit. So, again, this isn't necessarily you saying, I disagree, but you're kind of, like, not that interested. It sounds like you're more interested in the Broadway show.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Right, Exactly. And then so I. I said, we got to see a Broadway show, and you said, it might be too expensive. And then I made a concession here. I said, you've got a point there, but it would be so worth it. Right. So a concession. But now I'm still promoting my opinion that we should go.

[Michelle Kaplan]

And I said, I'll think about it. TKTS does have some pretty good discounts, I'll give you that. So I'm saying, yeah, it's expensive, but, yeah, we could get a discount. So it's possible.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yep. And then the High Line. I want to visit the High Line, but. And you have been there so many times. But I say it, but I love it. And then you say what?

[Michelle Kaplan]

I mean, I will. I mean, I will say the views are beautiful. So. Yeah, I could have said the. I could have also said, I mean, the views are beautiful. I will say that. Right. So however you want to put it. But yeah, yeah, I'm conceding this point. Yeah, I know you're excited about. I do love the Highline. And I'm saying. Yeah, that's true. There's like a lot of great things about the High Line. And I'm gonna highlight one here.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, I think when I was living there, they were just building it or hadn't built it yet or something because I feel like they built it late. I don't know. Yeah, it was a new thing. It was. I think it was just railroad track when I was living there. But then they made it and it became this whole thing really popular among locals and tourists. Right. It's not just a tourist.

[Michelle Kaplan]

It is one of those. Yeah, it's kind of interesting that way. So, guys, I believe this came from. The original conversation was on 2517. Did you spend a fortune? How to talk about your expensive purchases. Yes.

[Lindsay McMahon]

And Michelle, this truly is a connection episode, isn't it?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Oh, yeah. Again, this is not. This is about not dismissing someone. Right. Not just saying or. I don't agree.

[Lindsay McMahon]

You're.

[Michelle Kaplan]

That's ridiculous. You know, we don't. We don't want to do that when we're trying to make connections with people. And this just really is a great way to. Even if you don't agree completely or you know that you can still say something, as Lindsay said. I think the point, the big takeaway here is you gotta say something.

[Lindsay McMahon]

You gotta say something. Don't just stare blankly or don't look away and say nothing. That. That will kill connection. Probably faster than totally shutting down the idea, right? Yep. So there are two things we want to avoid. Not saying anything and then shutting down the idea. We're finding the middle space here, which will help you build your relationship with this person. Really good.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Definitely. All right, Lindsay, this was so much fun. And I'll talk to you soon.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, really good stuff today, Michelle. I'll talk to you soon. Have a good day.

[Sponsor Voice 1]

Bye.

[Michelle Kaplan]

All right, you too. Bye.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

Thanks for listening.

[Lindsay McMahon]

To all ears.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

English. Would you like to know your English level?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Take our two minute quiz. Go to allearsenglish.com fluency score. And if you believe in connection, not.

[Podcast Host / Announcer]

Perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything. See you next time.

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