AEE: One Way to Encourage Your Friends in English

Summary

All Ears English Podcast: "One Way to Encourage Your Friends in English" (January 25, 2025)

Hosts:

• Lindsay McMahon: The English adventurer from Colorado
• Michelle Kaplan: The New York radio girl from New York City

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Introduction

In the January 25, 2025 episode of the All Ears English Podcast, hosts Lindsay McMahon and Michelle Kaplan delve into a listener-submitted question focusing on encouraging friends through English expressions. This episode is tailored for intermediate to advanced English learners aiming to enhance their conversational skills, idiomatic understanding, and cultural fluency.

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Listener Question: "It's a Matter of When, Not If" ([00:57])

The episode kicks off with a warm introduction to a question from a loyal listener, Omid Zakari from Iran, who has been tuning in for nine years. Omid's question centers around the usage and applicability of the phrase:

Omid Zakari ([03:21]): "Could you please tell me about this phrase? 'It's a matter of when, not if,' in which situations can we use this? Thank you in advance."

Lindsay and Michelle express their excitement to address this insightful query, emphasizing the importance of such phrases in building connections and conveying confidence.

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Understanding the Phrase: "It's a Matter of When, Not If" ([03:21] - [05:22])

Meaning:
The phrase "It's a matter of when, not if" conveys certainty that an event will occur, with uncertainty only regarding its timing. It shifts the focus from doubt to inevitability, fostering a positive and encouraging outlook.

Lindsay McMahon ([03:59]): "It just means that things are gonna happen eventually. It's not, it's just you can be sure that the thing is gonna happen. It's just a matter of we're not sure the timing of the thing."

Usage Scenarios:

• Hypothetical Situations: When outlining future possibilities with an optimistic tone.
• Expressing Determination: Reinforcing personal goals and aspirations with confidence.

Michelle Kaplan ([04:10]): "For example, trying to get into a tough restaurant that's very popular, you might say, 'Oh, we will get into the restaurant. It's a matter of when, not if.'"

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Examples in Different Contexts ([05:07] - [09:12])

1. Professional Settings:

• Job Prospects: Encouraging a friend during a job search.

  Omid Zakari ([07:57]): "When somebody is searching for a job, 'It's a matter of when, not if,' you know."

2. Personal Development:

• Fitness Goals: Motivating oneself or others to achieve personal targets.

  Lindsay McMahon ([05:09]): "If you are determined to build more muscle, for example, 'I'm going to build more muscle. It's a matter of when, not if.'"

3. Everyday Scenarios:

• Health Precautions: Discussing the inevitability of minor illnesses.

  Lindsay McMahon ([08:17]): "He's going to catch a cold if he doesn't get more sleep and practice proper hand hygiene. It's a matter of when, not if."

4. Family Dynamics:

• Parenting Challenges: Addressing common household sicknesses.

  Omid Zakari ([08:33]): "A matter of when, not if. We all know that we're gonna get the [common cold]."

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Similar Expressions to "It's a Matter of When, Not If" ([10:23] - [11:43])

The hosts explore alternative phrases that convey a similar sense of certainty and encouragement:

1. "It's only a matter of time." ([10:33])

   • Usage: Reinforcing the inevitability of positive outcomes over time.

     Lindsay McMahon ([10:33]): "We'll find the house of our dreams. It's only a matter of time."

2. "It only takes one." ([11:04])

   • Usage: Highlighting that a single positive event can lead to desired outcomes.

     Lindsay McMahon ([11:15]): "If your friend's really struggling with the dating world, 'It only takes one,' to encourage them."

3. "No question." ([11:43])

   • Usage: Affirming certainty about a positive result.

     Omid Zakari ([11:43]): "With a little bit of hard work, we will ace this. No question."

These expressions serve as powerful tools for fostering optimism and reinforcing confidence in various situations.

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Role Play Demonstration ([11:51] - [14:24])

To illustrate the practical application of these phrases, Lindsay and Michelle engage in a role play scenario centered around party planning. This segment demonstrates how to seamlessly incorporate encouraging phrases into everyday conversations.

Scenario: Planning a party with uncertainties about the band and RSVPs.

Omid Zakari ([12:00]): "If the band shows up, we will be in great shape."

Lindsay McMahon ([12:04]): "Oh, they will show up. It's a matter of when, not if."

Omid Zakari ([12:15]): "Do we have all the RSVPs?"

Lindsay McMahon ([12:20]): "Well, not yet, but the deadline is tomorrow, so it's only a matter of time. I'm feeling very confident about this."

Omid Zakari ([12:45]): "This is going to be a good one."

Lindsay McMahon ([13:02]): "And I catch on to the if, and I say it's a matter of when, not if. I love that. So good."

This interaction showcases how using such phrases can alleviate uncertainty and build mutual confidence among friends or colleagues.

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Key Takeaways and Conclusion ([14:24] - [15:07])

Main Points:

• Empowerment Through Language: Utilizing phrases like "It's a matter of when, not if" can significantly boost someone's confidence and foster a supportive environment.
• Building Connections: These expressions not only encourage but also help in creating a bond over shared optimism and understanding.
• Versatility: Such phrases are adaptable to various contexts, be it personal goals, professional settings, or everyday challenges.

Lindsay McMahon ([14:40]): "If you feel like you can get behind some positive message, you can express that and help them to deal with the kind of challenges in life."

Encouragement for Listeners: The hosts urge listeners to incorporate these confident and positive phrases into their conversations to enhance their English proficiency and build meaningful connections.

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Additional Resources

• Previous Episode Recommendation:
  Lindsay refers listeners to episode 2331 titled "How are kids seen around the world?" for further engaging content.

• English Level Quiz:
  Michelle invites listeners to take a quick two-minute quiz to determine their English proficiency at allearsenglish.com fluency score.

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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or your preferred platform to continue your journey towards speaking American English like a native. Embrace the philosophy of "Connection NOT Perfection!"

Transcript

[Lindsay McMahon]

This is the All Ears English podcast. One way to encourage your friends in English.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Welcome to the All Ears English podcast. Downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless.

[Lindsay McMahon]

And fluent by focusing on connection, not.

[Michelle Kaplan]

Perfection, with your American hosts, Lindsay McMahon.

[Lindsay McMahon]

The English adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the.

[Michelle Kaplan]

New York radio girl, coming to you.

[Lindsay McMahon]

From Colorado and New York City, usa.

[Michelle Kaplan]

To get real time transcripts right on your phone and create your personalized vocabulary list, try the All Ears English app for iOS and Android. Start your seven day free trial at allearsenglish.com forward/app.

[Omid Zakari]

When a friend comes to you and is unsure about something, what can you say to make them feel more positive and energized? Today, get one key phrase to do this and build connection.

[State Farm]

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[Omid Zakari]

Hi, Lindsay. How are you?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Excellent, Michelle. How are you doing?

[Omid Zakari]

I'm good, thanks. Lindsay, do you think there are any definites in life?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Are there any definites in life? Well, what is that saying? That's so famous. The only thing you can count on in life is death and taxes.

[Omid Zakari]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Y Y yeah. Y Y ex.

[Lindsay McMahon]

So I suppose those things are. Are definites.

[Omid Zakari]

That's true.

[Lindsay McMahon]

But other than that, not really. Michelle.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah, not too much. Right. Today we're going to answer a listener question that I'm really excited about. We've been getting so many good listener questions. I absolutely love these. So. And today is no different. Lindsay, this question comes to us from. Would you like to read it?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. This is a question from Omid Zakari 7393 and Omid is a longtime listener. Michelle, I am excited to read this question. Thanks so much, Lindsay and Aubrey. I've been listening to your podcast for nine years.

[Omid Zakari]

Oh my gosh. Thank you.

[Lindsay McMahon]

That's such a long time. We love this listener. Oh my gosh.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I have a question for you. Could you please tell me about this phrase? It's a matter of when, not if, in which situations. Can we use this? Thank you in advance. Omid from Iran. Amazing. Long time listener. Yeah.

[Omid Zakari]

And Omid put a lot of the hearts and smiley faces. So we appreciate that. Thank you so much.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, we really appreciate that. So just like Omid, I'm sure that Omid is following all ears, English and Apple podcasts or Spotify or wherever. Maybe, Maybe he's a YouTube listener watcher because he asked this question. Anyways, hit follow, hit subscribe or follow wherever you are listening to the podcast. All right, perfect.

[Omid Zakari]

All right, so, yeah, great question. So what does it mean when we say it's a matter of when, not if?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, so that's a good question. So it just means that things are gonna happen eventually. It's not, it's just you can be sure that the thing is gonna happen. It's just a matter of we're not sure the timing of the thing.

[Omid Zakari]

Right, right, right, right, exactly. I mean, something's definitely going to happen. Not and no ifs needed. Right. It's. Yeah, exactly. The key is that we just don't know when. So when would this be used?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Well, hypothetical situations would be a good one. So when one person is positive about something and the other person is less sure. Right. So what does that look like, Michelle, in an example?

[Omid Zakari]

Right. So just talking about plans, even, you know, just like. So maybe you're trying to get into a tough restaurant that's very popular, you might say, oh, we will get into the restaurant. It's a matter of when, not if.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, perfect. Love that. Yeah, no, that's good. So what else? What else?

[Omid Zakari]

Well, yeah, these hypothetical situations, Lindsay, you were, you were mentioning. So it could be the company will start to unravel if we don't do something now. It's a matter of when, not if.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Exactly.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

And then when we're talking about goals, this is a very different orientation to it, to this phrase.

[Omid Zakari]

Right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

It's more of a positive orientation. So if you are determined to build more muscle, for example, I'm going to build more muscle. It's a matter of when, not if. I could see like a teenager saying this to his mom. You know what I mean? He's like, I'm gonna become buff, you know?

[Omid Zakari]

Right, right, right, right, right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

I'm going to the gym for 10 hours and you can't stop me.

[Omid Zakari]

It's right exactly. To me. I, I, I really like this. It's quite confident sounding. Lindsay, would you, would you use this?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, I think this is, this is kind of in line with my philosophy in life of everything changes, you know, change Even though we sometimes we don't notice it, but everything will change eventually. Right? Changes are normal. So when we see a big change coming, instead of getting scared and curling up and being afraid, we can see, hey, this was always coming, and it's just happening now instead of at another time. Right. And so now I'm gonna face the challenge and rise to the occasion. It's quite empowering, I think.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah. Yeah, I like that a lot. Yeah. Again, it depends how confident that you want to sound. Right? If you. If you're very confident something is gonna happen, you just don't know when. Give this a try.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Love it.

[Michelle Kaplan]

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[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay, Michelle, where else should we go with this?

[Omid Zakari]

So would you say this has more of a positive. Like, is it used more for positive or negative situations?

[Lindsay McMahon]

I think it's just. I. What do you think? I'm not sure how to answer that. I think both, actually.

[Omid Zakari]

I think. I think both, too. And I also think that it can be great for business. So, I mean, you know, when somebody is searching for a job, you know, oh, she's going to get a job. It's a matter of when, not if, you know. So it could be used to encourage somebody. So that's. So that's a Positive thing. But what's another example?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay, here's another example. He's going to catch a cold if he doesn't get more sleep and practice proper hand hygiene. It's a matter of when, not if. That's probably true. When you have kids and they're going to daycare and the, the parents are going to get sick. Matter of when, not if.

[Omid Zakari]

Right. Yes. I could see, I could see parents bonding over this. It's like, you know, oh, it's a matter of when, not if. We all know that we're gonna get the. Well, that's, you know, if one kid is sick in the family and then, you know, it's gonna rip through the house is gonna.

[Lindsay McMahon]

It's gonna rip.

[Omid Zakari]

A matter of when, not if.

[Lindsay McMahon]

When, not if. And by the way, that's a great bonus for our listeners today, Michelle. Rip through. Ripped through the household. This, actually, this phrase was used during the pandemic too, unfortunately. You know, pandemic ripped through certain cities and towns and countries. But yeah, for sicknesses within the household. Just the common cold. We might say that too. Yeah. Right.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah. Actually, my. It's so funny because then you don't know where it started or where it ended. So my husband and my two kids now are. They all have colds. And I don't really, but I kind of had something a couple like before them. So I don't know. You know, it's. I don't know. I don't know. Either I gave it to them or that was something else. You know, they all start to overlap.

[Lindsay McMahon]

But yeah, you never know. You never know exactly.

[Omid Zakari]

But yeah, I mean, this is good for connection, I think, because it just, it, it like, I mean, like the sickness example, this is something that can help you bond with people over shared experiences. And it can also just give you this sound of confidence. What do you think, Lindsay?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, you know, I really think it can be a great phrase to encourage someone. I liked your example of getting a job. You know, maybe if you don't have a job at the moment, you're going to get a job. It's just a matter of when, not if. If. If you have a friend that's in a not a great situation and they're worried about maybe, you know, their prospects, getting a job or other scenarios, you could use this to encourage them. I love that idea.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. So let's talk about some similar ways to express this idea. These are good ones. So the first one is it's only a matter of time. What do you think about that one.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah. I love that. Well, that's. I'm sure people had to say this to themselves. It's been hard shopping for homes, especially during the pandemic. Things got really competitive, you know, and so going back out there Saturday after. Stat after Saturday, you had to say something, you know, to yourself. So, for example. Yeah, again, we will. We'll find the house of our dreams. It's only a matter of time.

[Omid Zakari]

Love it. Yes, exactly. And this also makes me think of an another expression. It only takes one. Do you ever hear that?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, yeah.

[Omid Zakari]

So these could be used for the house or the job or if somebody wants to meet someone. Sometimes you could do a whole episode on this and might say, oh, it only takes one. Right.

[Lindsay McMahon]

That's. That's the example I was going to think of.

[Omid Zakari]

Oh, yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

You know, if your friend's really struggling with the dating world and they're really discouraged, dating is hard these days, you know, and to be able to say something, you know, it's hard to know what to say to people.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. Yeah. So. And then another thing you could say is. No question. That's just a very confident sounding thing to say. You could say, with a little bit of hard work, we will ace this. No question.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Exactly. So I don't have any others to add there. I think those are great. These are true connection skills. A hundred percent. Yes.

[Omid Zakari]

Yes. All right, let's put them together in a role play.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Let's do it, Michelle. So here we are planning a party and we are friends. So.

[Omid Zakari]

Okay.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay.

[Omid Zakari]

So, okay. So if the band shows up, we will be in great shape.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, they will show up. It's a matter of when, not if.

[Omid Zakari]

Okay, great. And the food?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, that's all squared away. No question.

[Omid Zakari]

Okay. Do we have all the RSVPs?

[Lindsay McMahon]

Well, not yet, but the deadline is tomorrow, so it's only a matter of time. I'm feeling very confident about this.

[Omid Zakari]

Yes.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Perhaps overconfident.

[Omid Zakari]

Yes, you are very confident. This is going to be a good one. Maybe you have some party planning experience. I don't know.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure. Imagine being a wedding planner and, you know, I guess you would have to be that confident about all the logistics if you're a wedding planner. Right?

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Oh, gosh. Yeah.

[Omid Zakari]

For sure. Yep. So here we are. You said, oh, they will show up. It's a matter of when, not if.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Okay, good. So I'm not. You're not quite so sure. Right. But I'm sure. Yeah. And I can Put you at ease.

[Omid Zakari]

Right. And you're echoing me because I said, oh, if the band shows up, we'll be in great shape. So you are saying. So you're kind of echoing them. So this can be a good one, guys. If you're listening to someone talk and they're saying, oh, if this happens, if that happens, then you kind of want to say, oh, it's going to happen. Right. It's. This is also about, you know, I know someone who's. Likes to talk a lot about, like, manifesting what's. What's going to happen by putting positive feelings and, you know, phrases out into the world and just being positive.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, absolutely. I love that. And I like that you highlighted that. I am mirroring what you're saying. So again, if the band shows up and I. I catch on to the if, and I say it's a matter of when, not if. I love that. So good.

[Omid Zakari]

Interesting. Then I said, and the food. And you said, that's all squared away, a bonus for today. What does that mean? If something's all squared away, it's all taken care of. Yes, it's all done. And then you said, no question.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yes, I'm very confident. Okay. And then you said, okay, do we have all the RSVPs? And I said, not yet, but the deadline's tomorrow, so it's only a matter of time. Clearly. Michelle, I have some party planning experience here. Right. I mean, I'm not a newbie.

[Omid Zakari]

No, not a newbie. So. But yeah, let's, let's. So you can use all of these. These are all very common. And Lindsay, another. Since we were talking about kids today and colds and all that stuff, we have episode 2331 was a conversation starter. How are kids seen around the world? That was a fun one.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Yeah, definitely. That is a good recommendation. So go back to 2331 and check that one out. Michelle, I think the takeaway here today is this. You know, it matters. It kind of matters what you say when someone comes to you and they're not sure about something.

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lindsay McMahon]

And you. If you feel like you can, you know, you can get behind some. A positive message, if you do believe that this thing is going to happen for them, you can express that and help them to deal with the kind of challenges in life. Right?

[Omid Zakari]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. This can really help you connect with someone who's feeling a little unsure of something. So. Yeah. Yeah. But this was a great question from Omid. Thank you so much. And yeah, Lindsay, I guess I'll talk to you on the next one.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Sounds good, Michelle. Talk to you soon. Bye bye. Thanks for listening. To all ears. English Would you like to know your English level?

[Michelle Kaplan]

Take our two minute quiz. Go to allearsenglish.com fluency score. And if you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make.

[Lindsay McMahon]

Sure you don't miss anything.

[Michelle Kaplan]

See you next time.

[Omid Zakari]

Hey y'all, it's Kelly Clarkson, here to talk Wayfair. No matter your space, style or budget, shop wayfair.com to make your home way more you. Wayfair Every style, every home.