E459 Radioactive Acorns and Chicken Tricks

Summary

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Podcast Summary: "And That's Why We Drink"

Episode 459: Radioactive Acorns and Chicken Tricks
Hosts: Christine Schiefer & Em Schulz
Release Date: November 23, 2025

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Episode Overview

This Thanksgiving-themed episode delivers the classic ATWWD blend of chilling mystery, hilarious banter, and wild speculative theories. Christine covers Pennsylvania’s infamous Kecksburg UFO incident (aka “Pennsylvania’s Roswell”)—a story of glowing acorns, a military swarm, and government secrecy. Em follows with the bizarre true tale of Lawrence Joseph Bader—a cookware salesman who vanished, reappeared as the flamboyant “Fritz Johnson,” and left two astonished families in his wake. The episode is peppered with memorable confessions (from school pranks to chicken bone eating), deep dives into government coverups, and the kind of oddball content that keeps fans coming back every week.

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Notable Banter & Opening Segment (03:59–24:17)

• Thanksgiving Song Chaos (04:25): The hosts attempt a word-by-word Thanksgiving song (“The cranberry sauce, we’re having mashed potatoes...”). Christine: “Everyone’s thinking, the whole world’s thanking you. For thanking us for thanking you... kill the turkey, Lynn.” [06:01]
• Life Updates:
  • Em’s heater woes lead to “space heater purgatory” with their dog, Hank. (06:29–08:01)
  • Christine recounts her rainy day tea ritual and her recent wild trip to Hawaii: attending a rum safari, feeding pigs tortillas, meeting eclectic friends, and being gifted a resin “graveyard” filled with preserved insects. (09:44–12:44)
  • Emotional moments as Christine describes attending a childhood friend’s wedding and confesses to being the Great Backpack Switcher of first grade. (“I switched everybody’s backpack in the entire grade. 65 kids.” [13:37])
• Childhood Prank Confession:
  • Christine details a prank involving switching all classmates’ backpacks—complete with dissociation and later revelation to the unwitting victim at a Skyline Chili dinner, a decade later (18:03–20:31).
  • Em and Christine psychoanalyze the prank (“You just needed some control. You were six. Who cares?” – [21:00]).

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Story #1: The Kecksburg Incident – “Radioactive Acorns from Outer Space” (24:17–74:17)

Introduction (24:17–27:16)

• Em explains the struggle to contain this story to one episode due to troves of documentaries and information. “I want to do those UFO stories justice! …The limit does not exist!” – [26:39]

The Incident:

December 1965, Kecksburg, PA (27:18–34:53)

• What Happened:

  • Residents see a massive “fireball in the sky”—variously described as football-sized, on-fire, trailing smoke, glowing so brightly that you couldn’t look at it, with some falling debris.
  • Tied reports from multiple states: Ohio, Indiana, Virginia, even Canada. “It sounds like they all saw the same thing, but as it was passing through their areas.” – Em [30:39]

• Crash Landing:

  • In Kecksburg, locals see the object land in the woods; some report a “sonic boom” and the ground shaking.
  • The first on the scene describe “a giant metallic acorn, no seams, glowing, covered in some kind of symbols or hieroglyphics.” [36:06]
  • Volunteer fireman James:

    “The object looked exactly like a fresh acorn that you would pick off a tree… stars, shapes, figures and circles and lines. What it was, I don’t know. …Here come two men… ‘We are in charge. We’re taking command. Get out of here.’” [38:29]

• Military Response (39:02–42:01):

  • The military, police, and FBI “descend within an hour,” block off the area, strong-arm locals out, and set up roadblocks.
  • Local reporter John Murphy claims early access and photos, later confiscated; he bases a radio docudrama on the experience.

• Radioactive Concerns & Coverup (43:02–47:30):

  • Some locals warn it might be radioactive. Authorities mention military engineers and scientists.
  • Family living near the crash site, the Hayeses, host military and “men in suits”—clearly in charge—who use their house as a command post for the night.

  “I saw six guys in radiation suits take a box down there, and I didn’t see them bring it out.” – John Hayes [47:02]
  “No calls turned up on my bill.” – John’s mother [47:54]

  • Military seen later removing a large tarped object on a flatbed truck.

Theories & Government Response

• Secrecy and Disinformation:

  • Conflicting explanations: some say meteor, others a Russian probe, others “experimental reentry vehicle.” All official agencies (military, NASA, Coast Guard) deny responsibility.
  • NASA at one point blames a Russian satellite (Cosmos 96), but the timeline/debris don’t add up. NASA says supporting documents have gone “missing.” [53:47]
  • SciFi Network funds lawsuits for more information; after legal wrangling, NASA only admits to “recovery and examination of space object debris”—revealing nothing.

• Skeptical and Local Views:

  • Most officials declare it a meteor, but trajectory and behavior (controlled descent, gliding, odd shape, and bizarre symbols) spark continued debate. “Meteors do not make controlled turns… either we’re dealing with some highly advanced space probe, or… we may indeed be dealing with an extraterrestrial spacecraft.” – UFO researcher Stan Gordon [59:53][60:54]

• Ufology Pop-Culture Legacy:

  • Unsolved Mysteries (1990) dramatizes the case, leaving the production’s acorn UFO replica as a town monument.
  • Kecksburg stages an annual UFO festival featuring “space acorn” parades, fireworks, and UFO speakers. [61:45]
  • Many documentaries referenced for further research.

Quotes

• “The eeriest part is that other people said it looked like it was trying to control its landing.” – Em [34:22]
• “What was more jarring…was how quickly the military appeared.” – Em [41:06]
• “If it was nothing, why didn’t you just let everyone see what it was?” – Christine [67:06]

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Story #2: The Double Life of Lawrence Joseph Bader (“Chicken Bones, Amnesia, and ‘Fritz’ Johnson”) (74:17–124:05)

Lawrence Joseph Bader – Origins, Disappearance (74:24–84:49)

• Born 1926, Akron, Ohio; financially comfortable background but notorious local risk-taker and schemer.

• Known for party trick: eating a whole roast chicken, bones and all.

  “He would eat an entire roast chicken, bones and all.” – Christine [78:05]

• March 1957: With IRS, marriage, and debt stress mounting, he tells his pregnant wife he might not return from a solo fishing trip at Lake Erie, rents a boat, sails off in a storm, and vanishes. Boat and life jackets found; Larry and his suitcase of cash are gone. [80:38]

The Rebirth as Fritz Johnson (84:49–94:57)

• Days later: In Omaha, Nebraska, a man calling himself John “Fritz” Johnson walks into a bar, instantly becomes a quirky local celebrity.
  • Outlandish stunts: wears an eyepatch (real, after eye tumor surgery); sports a curled mustache; deposits tips by “quart”; dates women, rides in a hearse with plush seats, and refuses to use dates on checks (“Late summer” instead of “August 5”).
  • “He wrote checks using the season instead of the date... would take tips to the bank in a glass milk jug and write deposit slip: ‘one quart of tip.’” [89:07]
• Known for speeches, magic tricks, winning state archery titles (despite one eye), and impromptu toasts (“vaudeville ready”).
• Publicity Stunt: Volunteers to live for days atop a pole in a small box (“a publicity roost”), supplied by friends via pulley—another example of his odd charisma. [92:54]

The Unmasking (94:57–105:47)

• At a Chicago sports expo (1960), a visitor from Akron recognizes Fritz as the presumably-dead Larry Bader. Larry’s family confirms via fingerprint analysis.
• Fritz, stunned, says: “If the fingerprints say it, I guess that’s my identity...” He insists on no memory of his Ohio life. [102:05]
• Theories emerge: Did he fake amnesia—concocting a flamboyant new life (informed by the looming presence of a brain tumor)? Or was it a genuine dissociative fugue—a rare but documented stress response?

Aftermath (105:47–124:05)

• Legal and personal chaos:

  • His Akron widow Mary Lou, engaged to remarry, faces the loss of life insurance payouts and government benefits (insurance company wants all money back); his Nebraska wife Nancy learns their marriage is invalid.
  • Publicity explodes in the press; Fritz withdraws from public life, moves into a YMCA room; remains seemingly baffled: “No clue about his past in Ohio and maybe God would end up having to sort this out.”
  • Dies from cancer (the same that cost him his eye) within a year of his rediscovery at age 39.
  • Two funerals held: one for Larry in Akron, one for Fritz in Omaha.

• Theories Discussed:

  • Possible suicide attempt interrupted; accidental injury; true fugue state or elaborate ruse (perhaps enabled by his changing mental state due to the tumor); sudden personality change—possibly frontotemporal injury.
  • Hosts analyze the neuroscience, suggesting possible number/dates confusion as additional evidence (“Maybe it was really something he couldn’t do,” Christine [121:56])

Notable Quotes

• “He did the chicken thing—but he was really chill and reserved. And now he’s wearing bow ties and on the radio… But for some people, some people can NOT help but put themselves in the spotlight.” – Christine [116:36]
• “If you saw this in a movie, you’d be like, no way that would ever happen.”—Christine on the case [119:28]
• “Every time I think of a weird thing, I’m like, no, that’s not the weirdest.” – Em [120:20]
• Em suggests, “I think he had a head injury.” Christine agrees: “It feels like, doesn’t it?” [122:06]

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Memorable Moments & Quotes

• Hosts debating acorn anatomy: “Listeners, which is the head and which is the tushy of an acorn?” [41:02]
• Nostalgia-fueled home décor critique: “I really can’t stand the farmhouse look. It’s obviously not a farm, baby.” – Em [70:54]
• Plot-twist glee: “He already sank on a ship!” – Em, drawing Titanic parallels to Bader’s disappearance [97:25]
• Christine, on Bader: “What lives he lived!” [109:40]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 04:25 — Thanksgiving song improvisation
• 13:37 — Christine’s "Backpack Bandit" school confession
• 24:17 — Start of Kecksburg Incident coverage (UFO story)
• 36:06 — Eyewitness description of the “acorn” UFO
• 46:38 — Hayeses’ account of military commandeering their farmhouse
• 61:45 — Unsolved Mysteries/Kecksburg Acorn monument/UFO festival
• 74:17 — Start of Lawrence Bader / “Fritz Johnson” saga
• 78:05 — “Chicken trick” party gag revealed
• 92:54 — Fritz’s “publicity roost” stunt
• 102:05 — Fingerprints confirm Fritz is Larry
• 117:56 — Hosts analyze brain-injury/number confusion theory

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Closing Thoughts

• Christine and Em reflect on how stranger-than-fiction stories, like the Bader mystery and Kecksburg’s acorn UFO, provide welcome levity among heavier true-crime fare.
• Mutual appreciation for “palette cleanser” episodes—Em declares: “Throw these in now and then. That was fun.” [113:47]
• Both contemplate returning to more disturbing content, but relish the rare episode where “almost all the crime is weird, not violent.”
• Thanksgiving plans: “I’ll wave to you from afar.” [124:24]

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Further Resources (Referenced in Episode)

• "Unsolved Mysteries" (Season 3, Episode 1)
• Sci-Fi Channel’s “New Roswell: Kecksburg Exposed”
• “Kecksburg the Untold Story: Secrets of UFOs, America’s Other Roswell”
• Discovery Channel’s “UFO Hunters”, History Channel’s “Ancient Aliens”, “Nazi UFO Conspiracy”
• Stuff You Should Know (Episode on Bader/Johnson case), Scary Interesting (YouTube feature)

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In the Words of the Hosts...

Why do we drink?

• “Because the world’s a scary, bizarre, and sometimes hilarious place.”
• And that’s why we drink.

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Transcript

[A]

This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. We have been using Squarespace since we started the podcast before, like since we.

[B]

Before we launched it, which is.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. So we've been using it longer than the podcast has been around because we have been. We were building out our website and it was so easy. For two people who've never built a website, it was just kind of a plug and chug situation. They made it so user friendly.

[B]

It's so true. And we've stuck around with them because since then they've only gotten better and more, you know, integrations, more features. For example, let me give you like a little situation here. If you're going to fundraise, which we're. We're not right now, but you know, if we want to go to the Mothman Festival and we need to fundraise for that, for example, you can fundraise directly on your website and grow your impact. With built in donation tools you can create a professional on brand website that makes it easy to accept one time or recurring contributions from your lovely fans. No, I'm kidding. With built in email campaigns and marketing tools that's also like a huge selling point. You can connect with your community and inspire more people to support your cause, which is a really cool angle.

[A]

Yeah. Any reason you need a website? Squarespace is there for you. Head to squarespace.com drink for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code drink to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. The holidays are upon us and businesses are hiring for seasonal roles. So if you happen to be somewhere that's kind of chilly, maybe you are looking to be thinking on the fly here. An elf at the mall for when kids are meeting Santa. Honestly, that was one of my dream jobs was to be a mall elf. But I was always too tall so it wasn't for me. But if it suits you, here's the thing, everyone. People with certain skills, experience or even a special license are in high demand and they are not easy to find. Believe it or not, it is not easy to find a mall elf. But whether you're hiring for one of these roles or any other role, the best way to find the perfect match for your role is, is on ZipRecruiter. And right now you can try it for [e-mail] Drink Let ZipRecruiter find the right people for your roles, seasonal or otherwise. We have told you so many times, we love ZipRecruiter. We used it. Thank God we did we found Eva immediately. We have nothing but nice things to say. We love ZipRecruiter. Please, please, please go use it. If you're even wondering, please go use it. Four out of five employers who post on SuperCruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. You know, that's how we found Eva. And right now you can for free at ZipRecruiter.com/drink again that ZipRecruiter.com/Drink ZipRecruiter. The smartest way to hire Christine. It is almost January, which for me is Dr. Season.

[B]

No.

[A]

So it. I. It ain't ain't so. So I guess it is so. And unfortunately, I've got a lot of things I got to do. I got to check my hearing, got to check my eyeballs, got to check my. What else? I have a lot of doctors coming up and I don't know where to look. Oh, wait, yes I do. I have to go to Zoc Doc.

[B]

No, it's really amazing. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment. They have. We've been using this for I think like 10 years or something like, like nine, like a really long time. Um, and nowadays it's so much more robust even than it was then. Um, you don't have to call anybody on the phone. You can see more than a hundred thousand doctors on the app across every specialty from mental health to dental health, et cetera. And you can filter them by insurance, see their ratings and reviews and their openings. So you don't even have to call the office. Just click it. And then within 24 to 72 hours, you've got an appointment.

[A]

Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to Zocdoc.com drink to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That's z o c-o c.com drink zocdoc.com drink. Pass the crayon. Wait, are we doing it by syllable or word?

[B]

I forgot that would mean I say.

[A]

Bear and then you say E so you don't want to turn up is what I'm hearing.

[B]

Okay. Oh my God. Wait, we should try that after the normal version. We should try the remix.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That's a sane. Sorry. You really caught me off guard.

[A]

It was like bear. Okay.

[B]

The cranberry sauce where having mashed potatoes.

[A]

Ooh, the turkey looks great.

[B]

Thank you for loving me.

[A]

Thank you for being there.

[B]

Everyone's heaven thinking.

[A]

Thanking the. Everyone's thinking the.

[B]

Usually I'm the one who gets in trouble for forgetting this.

[A]

Everyone's thinking.

[B]

The whole world's thinking.

[A]

You for thanking us. Thank you. Kill the dark.

[B]

Kill the dark Ache. Now let's do it syllable by syllable. I think we're ready.

[A]

Halfway through, I thought, I'm so impressed that I didn't even have to prepare and practice.

[B]

Incredible. Incredible. You got pretty far.

[A]

Everyone's thanking you. For thanking us. For thanking you.

[B]

Everyone's thinking, the whole world's thanking you.

[A]

I forgot about that.

[B]

For thanking us for thanking you.

[A]

Kill the turkey, Lynn.

[B]

I love that.

[A]

We should start. We should add Lynn to the end.

[B]

You should just be doing Lynn the whole time. That was at least a creed. Listen last year or the year before, we forgot so listen.

[A]

So I hope that was twice as good.

[B]

Take it or leave it, people. You either get this or you get nothing.

[A]

We'll try again next. Next week. No, next week because this is the beginning of the Thanksgiving bookend.

[B]

Oh, because it's in the middle. Right? Sure, sure.

[A]

So we.

[B]

So the next. Okay, yeah. Next time it'll be fucking flawless. This was just the dress rehearsal.

[A]

Syllable by syllable. It'll be out of control.

[B]

I can't wait. I can't wait. Yeah. Wow. That was beautiful. Are you at home? Yes. You are. I just looked at your background. I am no beautiful hotel art today.

[A]

Unfortunately, not today. No. Luckily. Luckily, I finally get to be here for a second. But. Yeah, everything's going all right over here, I guess. Although I'm gonna just jump in. The reason I drink right now is because our AC is. Our heat is broken.

[B]

Oh, you have heat? Remember when I lived in a house that only had heat in LA and not ac? It was really like so bad. Yeah, yeah. Well, you had to live there too, half your life because of the recording.

[A]

That was incredible. It was a breathtaking time. Well, the. Usually I never even use the heat, but of course this was the one week where it's been frigid and storming the whole time. And it's been like yesterday it got down to like 50, I think, which for us is, you know, winter. And it's just the one time I need the heat and it's been like at max 65 degrees in here. And so I've just been cold, cold, cold. So until the H Vac people get here, I just bought like a space heater and my place is.

[B]

Oh my God. Are they put.

[A]

Oh, wait, is the space heater broken.

[B]

Or is the heat just non existent? Like, is there.

[A]

It is existent. But it is broken.

[B]

Oh, sorry. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.

[A]

But so I got a space heater to keep the house warm.

[B]

I just picture you and Hank huddled under a shared blanket.

[A]

We both slept on the couch last night together next to the space heater. But the space heater worked well and now it's too hot. But I don't want to like, let the cold air in because then I don't know how long it'll take to like, re. To re. Neutralize the room. So I'm kind of a little sweaty.

[B]

And you like, turn it off?

[A]

I did turn it off.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

But it's just I'm kind of waiting for the. The cold to seep back in and then I'll be too cold and then I'll have to wait forever for the heat to fix it. It's just a. A dance I'm doing over here all by myself, so.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. It's too bad we can't be cold blooded like those iguanas or whatever.

[A]

You're telling me. Why do you drink this week?

[B]

Hey, have you ever seen about those iguanas that fall out of trees?

[A]

Did one hit you in the head?

[B]

No. Although that would explain a lot. But have you heard about that?

[A]

No, I thought that was your entry into why you drink this week.

[B]

No, but that is a great question. I wish I could say yes, but no apparent. Florida, when it gets too cold, these, I think they're iguanas will like freeze and not freeze like, but their body, because they're in the fall out of a tree and people will like pick them up and they're like stunned. And so they think they're dead. And then they bring them into their house for some reason. I mean, I say that judgmentally, as if I wouldn't do the exact same thing. And then they come alive in the war.

[A]

These things are also huge.

[B]

They're huge.

[A]

They're the size of like in my mind. Like what, an alligator?

[B]

They're like a geo size like a baby alligator.

[A]

Yeah, it. They're huge.

[B]

I can imagine just like thudding out of the trees. I mean, that's like a nightmare. Florida's insane.

[A]

If one of those fell and hit you in the head, you could die for sure.

[B]

I mean, really, I shouldn't even joke about it. You're right. It's probably someone. Yes, but Florida man killed when iguana falls. Yeah, exactly like.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Well, anyway, my.

[A]

Before I ask you, I was gonna say the good reason I drank up until. The reason I drank up until Five minutes ago, and I was way too fucking hot. Was going to be, because it finally rains and I had my moment. It's been like, I got to have my stormy little cup of tea next to the window and watch the rain and shiver. Wear my cozy clothes. Finally. Anyway, that was what I was going to say, but what I really want to get to is like, can you. How. How was your trip? Have I seen you since your trip?

[B]

Oh, Hawaii. It was great. I'm like, what trip? Yes, it was lovely. I. My friend got married. It was awesome. We went on a rum safari. Oh, yeah.

[A]

I did see you. You did say rum safari last time.

[B]

Well, I talk about it a lot because I think it's just the coolest thing to do at a wedding. And then I got to throw tortillas at the pigs.

[A]

Nope. You. We didn't talk about this. What now?

[B]

Yeah, so there was a rum safari in the jungle, and then we got to throw tortillas at the pigs because that's.

[A]

Do they like that?

[B]

They loved it. They loved the stuff. And then we got to pet a horse. It was just like, a really magical. And then, you know, my friend got married to her. Her. The love of her life. And it was so beautiful, I cried the entire time. Which usually, yeah, I've, like, not been a huge crier lately, but weddings, man, they get me every time. Especially a gay wedding. I'm like, oh, I love it. And then I said, I love, love. And they were like, you're not allowed to say that. Anything but that. And I was like, did you just.

[A]

Wear a big rainbow dress?

[B]

I'm at a gay wedding. I love, love. Yeah, it was great.

[A]

Did you. Was I gonna say, oh, my gosh, what's wrong with me? Where in Hawaii did you go?

[B]

Kauai. Oh, and I saw my friend Gina, and she's such a kook. She's so funny. She made me shit. I forgot it. I'll show. Oh, can we do. Okay, this is. I swear, we don't script this. Sometimes people get annoyed. But I'm serious. I want to show for our intermission the gift that Gina gave me, which is this, like, wild resin graveyard situation with live animals in it that are no longer alive.

[A]

Iguanas.

[B]

She. She made a plaster cat. She put resin all over an iguana, and then it came back alive. No, she made me this. She's like. She's just such a funny character. She's a character. You know when you just know someone, you're like, wow. Yeah, you're. You're Just fascinating. And I met her in Egypt and then. Sorry, I forgot to add that. And then she's like, oh, I live on Kauai. And I like, hang on a minute. I'm going there in November. So we hung out for lunch, and she showed me her. Like, she built her own bed. Like, this is the kind of like. Yeah, it's just wild. She's just wild. And so she does stained glass, and she also does resin work. And she's also a chocolatier. She went to culinary school.

[A]

That's all you had to say.

[B]

I know, and I should have led with that. And she's just so funny. So we hung out and she made me this, like, crazy light up crystal graveyard thing. So I'm. And it has dead animals. Well, dead insects in it. It's so scary. I'm gonna show it to you in the. In the yap year. But so it was great. It was a great trip. It was very. Oh, and then I showed. Oh. And then she. She dropped me off at a yellow convertible at the welcome dinner. And my friend was like, was that your Uber? And I was like, oh, no, that's my friend Gina. And she's like, your friend Gina. And I was like, oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you. This is like the bride. She's like, where were you? I was like, oh, my friend Gina and I were hanging out. Here's this.

[A]

Here's my dead.

[B]

Yeah, here's the skull she gave me. I'm like, any. It was like a very goofy but fun time. Thank you.

[A]

I was gonna say, I just remembered. One of the reasons I imagine you were crying is because it was like a childhood friend getting married too, right?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

How long have you known?

[B]

Ever since first grade when I put her. When I bullied her. Because. Well, actually, that story. Okay, this is why I drank, because this got brought up 70,000 times.

[A]

2001.

[B]

Here it comes. When we were in first grade. Now, I don't remember this. And this is actually quite an admission. And I feel like if my therapist ever listens to an episode, this is the one she should listen to because it really does crack open, like, a whole other side of myself that I've never explored. The year was 1997.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

It just occurred to me at the wedding as people were telling the story. That was also the year my parents got divorced. So let's write that down. And I was clearly having a moment. Okay. I was going through it. I didn't even barely speak English. I had a pretty thick accent.

[A]

Again, the fucking English. I know.

[B]

Listen, it's important context. And I'm sitting there with my little accent. I don't really know anyone. I'm just always observing, right? I'm like always just, you know, hyper vigilant. And for some reason, one afternoon, everyone goes to recess and I hide in the coat room. And then everyone goes out to recess and I stay behind and I switch everyone's backpacks. We all had like name tags on our cubbies. And I switch everybody's backpack in the entire grade. And it's like 65 kids. I take Alyssa Evans backpack. And I think to myself, this girl, she had it coming. And I walk into the boys bathroom.

[A]

And has she done anything where she really deserved it to be coming?

[B]

She did. She would brag about how tall she was all the time. And I. I was like, get the fuck out of here with this. You're not special. By the way, it's very funny because now she's like five foot three. So she's very.

[A]

But at. But five foot three in first grade is incredible.

[B]

I mean, she was really tall and she was older than me. And I thought, like, what is her deal? And so then I took her back. I mean, literally, I. We had no beef. There's no discernible humbler.

[A]

Real fast.

[B]

I wanted a humbler. And I. I took her backpack and I put it in the trash can of the boy's bathroom. Like, what an insane thing to do. And so I put it in the trash can and then I write a bunch. Oh my gosh. There was my friend Olivia at the time. I wrote her a note and pretended to be a boy in school. And I said, I love.

[A]

And I knew that too when I was gay. Dude.

[B]

Okay, well, yeah. Again, therapist, write that down, please.

[A]

I think you were having your first bi awakening with Olivia.

[B]

Could very well be. She was very pretty. And our friendship didn't last long. I wonder why.

[A]

So, because she liked someone else, I think.

[B]

Huh. Actually, do you know what? We also had a club. It was called the Ghost or the Scary Ghost Club or something. Okay, we have a lot to talk about. It's fine. We'll talk about another time. I forgot about that. So. So then I put every. Okay, so I. With everyone and then I sneak back out and I've so vividly remember. It was like a. It was like total dissociation. Then I went outside and I remember being behind the building and thinking to myself, welp, too late now. And I just like. And because I was so not to be like, dramatic, invisible. I like Snuck around the corner and just kind of, like, hung out on the swing for the rest of recess. Nobody clocked that I was missing. And chaos, chaos ensued. The entire grade erupted in, like, where's my backpack? And, I mean, I switched. Like, I feel like you look like.

[A]

Regina George standing in the middle of a hallway. And everyone's just chaos around her, but she's standing kind of like, that's kind.

[B]

Of what it felt like. And I was like, whoa, I've tasted power. And I just felt like, oh, my God, this is the beginning of a serial killer or something. And so I was, like, kind of, like, immediately regretting it because I was like, this could go really bad. And, like, people are really upset. And I don't know what I thought would happen. I don't think I was thinking it through, but I just thought this would be a funny prank. And then it, like, wasn't funny. And the way Alyssa tells it now is that she. Everyone finally found their backpack, except for Alyssa. And she missed the bus. And so she missed dance class, and she had to have somebody come pick her up. And they finally found her backpack in the boys bathroom. So, of course, a few days, you know, the next day they have this big all grade meeting.

[A]

Oh, no. Like, because of you. Yes.

[B]

And so they sit us all down and they say, we know who did this. We already know who did it. I want everyone to close their eyes, and the person who did it, we need you to raise your hand. You won't get in trouble if you admit it right now. Everyone closes their eyes, and I'm like, bullshit. You have no fucking clue. You're bluffing. They were fully bluffing. They never figured out it was me. They were basically like, she doesn't even speak English. How could she be? That's not her.

[A]

Well, also, like, another defense you could have used is, well, I don't speak English, so I don't understand what you just fucking told me.

[B]

I would have raised my hand, you know, no clue. Yeah, sorry about that love note I wrote in English. Yeah. So that's what happened. Oh, the craziest part is that just kind of went like. It just. We moved on. Nobody ever talked about again. Nobody ever figured out was me a student. Like, I wasn't, like, causing any other trouble. That was the one thing I ever did, like, in school that was, like, really chaotic and could have gotten me in big trouble. And I got. I think I just, like, quit while I was ahead, you know, I was like, well, I did it.

[A]

And then I've tasted Power time.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's time to wrap it up, right? At least I have control. And, like, some of these men, you know, in the government, they're like, let me keep going, get it together. So then Alyssa and I become, like, best friends. We are ride the bus together for many years, ironically, because my mom gets divorced and moves to the same neighborhood where Alyssa lives. So we're on the same bus, and it's all great and hunky dory. And then we're like, 17 or 18. My dad takes Alyssa and me to Skyline Chile. And we're just having dinner, and we're talking about what kind of backpacks we used in elementary school. And Alyssa goes, oh, my God. Do you remember in first grade the time that. That one. Somebody, like, switched all our backpacks? And I'm like, no, not really. I literally didn't remember. And she's like, you don't remember that somebody took my backpack and, like, put it in the trash of the boys bathroom? And my eyes start going wide, and I'm like, oh, my God. And I said, I don't know how to tell you this, but that was me. And she was so shocked. She was like, why? I was like, because you thought you were so cool. It really. I mean, it really was, like, 10 years later that this finally came out, and I didn't even remember.

[A]

It's crazy.

[B]

It's crazy. Like, what is going on?

[A]

If you could have gone back in time and just told yourself, like, don't worry.

[B]

The.

[A]

The growing stops. Like, she. She won't be tall forever.

[B]

One day, you'll be filming her wedding on.

[A]

You don't have to do this.

[B]

Yeah. And you'll realize, oh, she's actually shorter than everyone here. And it'll be so fulfilling.

[A]

You know, the second you got taller than her, she should have just stolen your suitcase or something.

[B]

I know.

[A]

She's. You owe her.

[B]

I do. No, trust me. I've spent the rest of our friendship trying to make up for it. And it really was, like, one of those moments where I went. That sounds so familiar. But, you know, I was so good that I put my own back. I switched my own backpack. Like, I'm not stupid. Like, I wasn't just gonna stand there, pretend like I'm the only one whose backpack didn't get switched. Like, I put more. The thing is, I remember planning this, which is also insane, because I remember the day before being like, tomorrow's the day.

[A]

The insane thing, too, is that your final act of all of it, was to even make yourself Forget so that way, like.

[B]

Yeah, no, that's how good I was masking is. I was like. I would never do something like that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Would I?

[A]

That's criminal mastermind right there.

[B]

I mean it. Really. Yeah. So anyway, that's how Alyssa and I met.

[A]

Great.

[B]

You know what?

[A]

You ended up at her wedding, so everything turned out fine.

[B]

I was like one of the only guests at her wedding. I felt like I pretty much nailed the whole, you know, redeeming myself thing, so.

[A]

Perfect.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

A great reason to drink.

[B]

I bet.

[A]

That's why I listen drinks too.

[B]

You know what? Everyone kept bringing it up, so I think she got plenty of. Plenty of entertainment out of it. Yeah, perfect. Well, also, if anyone wants to weigh in on like, maybe on like a therapeutic psychological level, please, please feel free.

[A]

I think it's pretty self explanatory. I think you just.

[B]

Do you.

[A]

Yeah. I think you just needed some control.

[B]

For us to let off some. Yeah, okay, that's. That makes sense.

[A]

Yeah. You were six. Who cares?

[B]

I was so good at it.

[A]

That's interesting.

[B]

That's scary. That's what scares me. And then I'm like looking at Leona, who's literally a duplicate of me, and I'm like, oh, well, the second you.

[A]

Get a call from the school and they're like, everyone's backpacks are all be like crazy Deutsch. That does mean you speak German, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Just wanted to make sure that I didn't just like.

[B]

No. Very good. Very, very apropos. Yes.

[A]

Throw another language out under the bus. For some reason.

[B]

Hey, Leona really won't eat anything unless she decides that it's time for her to eat those things. And it's exactly what a 4 year old would say, what you'd expect. And that's why Blaze and I are very thrilled that we found nurture life. Or I guess nurture life found us, because they will.

[A]

Who rescued who?

[B]

Who rescued who?

[A]

Because.

[B]

Well, they rescued me, there's no doubt. Because they send these healthy, nutritionally balanced diet meals, but it has like Mac and cheese, spaghetti and meatball, like things that like chicken nuggets, things she'll actually eat, but they're like, structured in a way that you're not just kind of willy nilly guessing nutrition wise. And it's been a lifesaver because she just gets her little tray and she feels really special because it's like, you know, her own meal. And they're really nutritious and they only take a minute to prep and you.

[A]

Can choose from more than 50 nutritious meals and snacks on their menu. From finger foods to babies and toddlers to kids meals to older kids. And the Nurture Life does the cooking for you. And the fresh meals are delivered straight to your door in refrigerated packaging.

[B]

So head to nurture life.com drink and use code drink for 55% off your first order plus free shipping.

[A]

That's right. It's 55% off plus free shipping. Once again, that's nurture life.com drink and make sure you use our promo code drink. Even if you aren't a parent with young kids, you might have parent friends who struggle with mealtime. So make sure to share our code so our show gets the credit.

[B]

Yeah, we deserve the credit. Remember, put your little ones first with healthy meals from Nurture Life.

[A]

Anytime I have to look classy, I got Quince. Yes. I recently got a blazer from them. Oh, I don't know about how if it really is recently anymore because I got it a few months ago and.

[B]

I've shot so much use.

[A]

I know that's the thing so many times.

[B]

Yeah, because they're like classy and like chic and they don't. They're not like a one and done like, oh, I've already worn that.

[A]

Especially since I basically only ever wear tie dye. I was like, when am I gonna wear this? But it looked too good to pass up. And then I actually like three different events have happened where I needed a blazer and I was like, oh, well, this.

[B]

Well, don't mind. I do. Okay. No, they have it all. 50 Mongolian cashmere sweaters. Also got one of those bad boys made for everyday wear. Denim. Oh, my gosh. I bought my jeans there now too. I'm just reminding myself of all the things that I have filled my beautiful home with. They have all sorts of awesome things. Also great gifts, just FYI. Like, if you're looking for gifts, Quince Italian wool coats are gorgeous. I have them on my wish list. Multiple on my wish list. So maybe someday Santa will find that and get me.

[A]

One step into the holiday season. With layers made to feel good, look polished and last from Quince. It's perfect for gifting or keeping for yourself.

[B]

Go to quince.com drink for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com drink to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quinns.com drink.

[A]

Okay, well, I have a story for you. I know that. I want to give you a thank you because we're recording an hour late because I was trying to finish up some notes. I. And even though you gave me that. That hour, I have to regretfully tell you that I still didn't do nearly as much research as I would have liked, because every time I thought, oh, this is the last documentary, there was, like, five more that showed up, and I was like, what the fuck?

[B]

Well, and then you have to weigh the, like, pros and cons because you're like, okay, well, obviously more I know, the better. But then I can get inundated with so much info that you're like, well, what do I include? What do I leave out?

[A]

Yeah. Well, thank you for justifying that, because I do feel like there's got to be. I'm sure one documentary I didn't watch had, like, some completely different plot twist, and I didn't get to see that one. So I. I hope I do this justice. I did quite a lot of research, but I. I don't know if I'm gonna miss a big plot hole. Usually I don't rest until I've watched and. And gathered everything. And this time I was trying to just do my notes, and then I was gonna watch stuff, and it just. Timing didn't work out, I guess. But anyway, so I'm a little nervous to cover this. Hopefully. Hopefully people in the area are.

[B]

You got it. Oh, that's not me snapping at you to, like, hurry up. That's me clapping. Yeah, yeah, I got one. Okay.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

It's not like, okay, speed it up now.

[A]

All right, then. Hurry up.

[B]

Paying attention.

[A]

Yeah. Okay, so I guess this is my attempt at the Kecksburg incident, which ufo. UFO moment.

[B]

I've heard about it, but I don't know any. I don't remember. No, but I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't remember. I promise. I just. I say that to say, omg, I'm excited for a UFO story because, you know, I actually, yesterday was thinking, God, I keep learning stuff about aliens and hearing stuff about aliens are everywhere in my. In my. Like, it might be the algo. You know, just my life algo. And so I think you're just kind of confirming that for me.

[A]

Well, thank you. Well, I. One of the things that I'm most frustrated about is that I constantly want to give you UFO stories because I know you enjoy them, but.

[B]

And I cannot be satiated.

[A]

But after, like, 500 episodes, there's only so many left with really good meat to them. So I want to do those justice. And this happens to be one of them. And then I just like, couldn't even. There was the. What did fucking Lindsay Lohan say? The limit does not exist when it comes to like.

[B]

I was like, didn't a mathematician say that?

[A]

What did Lindsay Lohan say? Played by Lindsay Lohan.

[B]

I was like, Lindsay Lohan said a lot of things.

[A]

No, I just, I'm just frustrated because, like, I finally got a really good one and then like, I just kept there, kept being more and I'm like, well, there's nothing I can do at some point.

[B]

So listen, what I tell myself in those scenarios is, hey, I can always do a deeper dive for some other YouTube Patreon or another episode. Who knows?

[A]

We can always revisit. We can always revisit.

[B]

This is your world.

[A]

We're just living in it, you know? And I've always said that so.

[B]

And Lindsay Lohan has always said that.

[A]

She's always backed me mathematically.

[B]

Oh, that's beautiful.

[A]

So Kecksburg is in Pennsylvania. Actually, the Kecksburg incident has also been called by a few of these articles and documentaries as Pennsylvania's Roswell.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

Which by the way, I'm aware I've never covered Roswell because that one horrifies me. Talk about having a lot of meat to it.

[B]

Oh, horrifies. I was gonna say, I know some creepy stuff happened there, but yeah, as far as research is concerned.

[A]

Yeah, that'll be a big one.

[B]

Big one.

[A]

That'll be like a three parter situation.

[B]

Multi part. Yeah. Because then there's all this stuff during.

[A]

When like the government gets involved. And then when the government.

[B]

And then Gen Z got involved. I hate when Gen Z gets involved.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

They were all like, we're going to Roswell. And it's like Covid. And anyway, literally, like they.

[A]

I, I feel like I was right. When Covid, it was like dinner, right? Yeah, I think it got canceled because of COVID or something like that.

[B]

It was almost like it got started during COVID and then they were like, wait a second, we can't really do that. And then the day it was supposed to happen, only a few people showed up or something. It's like they had no follow through.

[A]

For those who don't know, there was like a massive group of people, like thousands and thousands.

[B]

Well, and think about how Tick Tock was like taking off. So it was like the first like big Tick Tock Gen Z movement.

[A]

This whole group of people were like, we're gonna go storm area 51. We're tired of them not telling us what's in there. And they were like, they can't get all of us.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, they can'.

[A]

All of us.

[B]

I mean, that's the most Gen Z thing I ever heard.

[A]

And just try and I feel like it happened in like March 2020. And I think with COVID they were like, we'll postpone. And then the, the fire died.

[B]

Tragic, Tragic. Maybe you can reignite it for us.

[A]

Maybe the government created Covid so they wouldn't start.

[B]

Oh, finally a theory that makes sense.

[A]

Thank you. Okay, so Kecksburg incident is in Kecksburg, Pennsylvania. And this was in 1965. This is in December. Catsburg. Kex. Kecksburg by the way, is 30 miles south of Pittsburgh.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[A]

And it was a small little area. The population wasn't even a thousand people. So around 4:45pm all of a sudden, multiple reports start coming in in the area of a fireball in the sky.

[B]

Fireball in the sky.

[A]

I can twice as high, just need a butterfly to fly past the really?

[B]

Really? Pixel fix.

[A]

They said that they saw a fireball in the sky. They said it was. It looked from where they were standing as to up in the sky as about a football size object, which I would say that's like.

[B]

That feels big.

[A]

Pretty big, right? If it's a, like if it looks.

[B]

In the sky ball size to you, right, then it's pretty large.

[A]

Like a plane. Looks like a football size maybe to me. In the sky.

[B]

Not even like if it's like pretty low. Yeah.

[A]

So yeah, it was a football sized object on fire with smoke trailing behind it. And many people also reported that not only was there this fireball, but there was a lot of falling debris in the area. Not only people in Pennsylvania saw this. This is the strangest part and like weirdly not elaborated on at all is that people in different states apparently saw this in different chunks. Like there were reports through like Ohio, Indiana, Virginia, Canada. They're like it like multiple reports where like if you line it all up, it sounds like they all saw the same thing, but as was passing through their areas.

[B]

Oh, okay, that's.

[A]

That's what I'm understanding. If I'm getting that wrong, somebody tell me because it was shocking to me how little that was.

[B]

Like Ohio and Pennsylvania makes sense, I guess, like if it were going in a certain direction.

[A]

One of them was.

[B]

It was in Indiana.

[A]

Indiana.

[B]

Indiana was also on the line. The only thing that throws me off is Canada, but. But I guess maybe if you came from the north and swooped into Indiana. I don't know.

[A]

I have no idea. All I know is that. Hang on. My stepdad just texted me.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

He said something about getting me a hover disc for Christmas. What?

[B]

Okay, you better respond to that right away and say 100 emoji. 100 emoji.

[A]

Check it out and tell me what you think. Everybody is gonna watch me. Look at this hover.

[B]

Say, Christine would also like one too.

[A]

Oh, it's literally a big ass drone or something. It looks like a lawnmower but a backpack. I don't want this. What is this? Okay, I'm just gonna write, but tell.

[B]

Me what you say to say, no, thank you.

[A]

I think I'm just gonna write and that's hard. Oh. Oh.

[B]

I'm like, you have to be really thoughtful about that.

[A]

And you're like, no. Well, the irony. I literally, I just sent him. I know, I'm like literally in my 30s talking to a man in his 60s, but I sent him a Christmas list because I just wanted.

[B]

He's like, how about this instead? Yeah.

[A]

I was like, did you not just.

[B]

See what's on your Christmas list?

[A]

Like a mug and like a sweatshirt? I saw like, it was like nothing big. I was like, hey, in case you need any idea, a new H vac system, fucking hover desk, lawnmower, backpack.

[B]

I mean, to be fair, that does scream.

[A]

It does sound, yes. But I was like, the mug is fine.

[B]

You know, actually, let's just stick to the mug.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah. I was like. Because I. I also know my, my mom, bless her, she tries really hard, but a lot of times she'll. She'll send me things that like 17 year old me would have loved. And I'm like, I think maybe we need classics. Let me just send some inspo your way. Anyway, sorry everyone watching the Christmas planning happening.

[B]

Seriously, I'm. I'm into it.

[A]

But yeah. So I thought that was really odd that there were reports from all these places that if you line them up time wise, it sounds like they were all seeing the same thing flying through their area at according times.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

At their respective times. I Anyway. And even pilots from the sky saw something fiery in the sky but couldn't tell what it was. Some people on the ground reported seeing just a glowing object with wisps of colorful light flying above them. Some people saw some. Something glowing really, really brightly where they couldn't even look at it. There were reports of an object that was slowly descending from the sky almost as if it was attempting a controlled landing.

[B]

Okay. Because I was gonna say, you wouldn't think it would be a slow des. It were like just a meteor crashing to earth. But what do I know?

[A]

I think you know a lot. Remember that sentence you just said?

[B]

Thank you. That's what I wanted to hear.

[A]

This is one quote. This is two quotes from two different people that saw something that day. We saw this thing coming over the top of the trees. It just glided right across the sky, like across the horizon. Another person said, you knew what an airplane looked like. You knew what a helicopter looked like. And that didn't look like anything we had ever seen before. And at the angle it was coming in, you knew that it was going to hit the ground, which is terrifying.

[B]

Scariest thing. Yeah. To see something like. And you're like, that's crash. I've had dreams about that. Like helicopters crashing and stuff.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Freaks me out.

[A]

Well, I mean, a fireball of coming towards you and like, it's getting bigger and bigger and you know it's gonna.

[B]

Fall and you can't do anything. You can't like, even warn anyone, you know?

[A]

And to me, for some reason, the eeriest part is that other people said it looked like it was trying to control its landing.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So it's almost like let's pretend it was a UFO and there were aliens inside. It was almost like they. They were trying to do like an emergency landing of their own spacecraft. And then now I'm empathetic towards the fucking aliens. I'm like, I know.

[B]

Put on your seatbelt. Yeah.

[A]

So anyway, a lot of people in Kecksburg, Pennsylvania, despite all these other places making reports. In Kecksburg, they started reporting to see something crash land in the woods. There were apparently reports of a sonic boom, which not everybody heard, which makes me think it was.

[B]

I don't know if that's clay. That's what we would call a sonic boom, as that day's like yellow journalism.

[A]

If I sneeze too loud, I call it a sonic boom. Right?

[B]

Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just called colorful language.

[A]

Yeah. A lot of people also were reporting fires in grass nearby them. Almost as if one of two things was happening that maybe it had already begun crashing. It was bouncing across the field and leaving like this big fiery spot on the ground. Or that it was falling apart in pieces. I was going to say debris was getting.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

So everyone in town was seeing this thing, or at least newbody who knew somebody who was seeing this thing. People start running towards the woods to see what the object was. And a lot of them even said that they knew the moment this thing officially landed because they all felt a big vibrational thump on the ground.

[B]

A sonic boom perhaps.

[A]

Sonic boom from inside the earth. Some of the people were able to actually describe what crashed into the ground. And I say only some people bear with me. So, okay, everyone hears this thing, they feel the boom, they run towards it. And the first group of people who get there are able to describe what they see. And they call it basically this giant metallic acorn.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

With that's got some sort of symbols on it. A lot of websites were calling it hieroglyphics. That felt a little yucky. But I'm just gonna go with symbols. And as the phrase. Apparently the acorn had no seams on it, which we've heard a lot about with spacecrafts. Yeah, no wings. It had no, like, there was nothing on it that made you think this thing should be able to fly. And it was glowing so brightly that it looked like someone was welding.

[B]

Oh, weird.

[A]

Like a bright blue electric light.

[B]

They're glowing and then you think like, oh, the metal's this like liquidy metal that doesn't need seams. And it's like, ooh, what kind of alchemy?

[A]

You know what? That's exactly what they said. What kind of alchemy is going on here? There was a volunteer fireman that night named James, and he's like, I'm so.

[B]

Glad I volunteered to be a fireman. This is so kick ass.

[A]

It's like of all the things that could have happened in Kecksburg, Pennsylvania in 1965, I've never thought I want to.

[B]

Be a volunteer fireman. I know that probably comes as a shock to everyone, but I will say this is the first time I've ever thought.

[A]

Thought maybe that is for me, certainly the second that someone else voluntarily gets a position where they get to see something cool. I'm like, well, now that must be mine.

[B]

Well, I think I want to do that too.

[A]

Well, so James, he volunteered that night. And I think I feel like I got conflicting stuff. But the. Mainly what I was hearing is that he volunteered that night. And he was responding to what he thought was multiple reports of somebody saying that like a plane had crashed in the sky.

[B]

Oh, yeah, that's scary.

[A]

Nobody knew what it was. They just saw something flying out of the sky and covered in flames. And it's metal.

[B]

And you're like, oh, it's some sort of aircraft.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. So a lot of people, maybe people Thought it was a ufo, but enough people thought that it was just a plane crash. And now the fire department has to come save people. So that was kind of the way that it was first introduced to him. But this is a quote that he was able to give about what he saw. He's one of the first people who was there. This is a long one, but worth it. The object looked exactly like a fresh acorn that you would pick off of a tree. There were no wings, there were no motors. There were no propellers. There was no identification whatsoever that could identify it as an aircraft that I would know. There was a bumper on the bottom part of it, and on the bumper there is what I call. It looked to me like ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics. It had markings like stars, shapes, figures and circles and lines. And what it was, I don't know. To this day, I've never seen anything like it. So we're all standing around this thing, wondering what the heck it could be. And finally, here come two men down through the woods, and they took one look at the object and immediately told us to leave. We are in charge. We're taking.

[B]

Were they men in black? You know, per chance.

[A]

In the black of night?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Hold that thought also.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

We are in charge. We're taking command. Get out of here is what they said.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

So we left there, and by the time we got back down here to the fire hall, this place was wall to wall military.

[B]

Also, like, wow, they must have been really. They must have had some gravitas to just walk in and go, we're in charge. Get out. Everyone's like, okay, bye.

[A]

Yeah, true.

[B]

You know, like, you'd think someone would go, hey, well, who are you? You know? But it's like, whoa. No, apparently they're in charge.

[A]

So I did see one source say that after all the military was there, and then after all the military left, there were people kind of still snooping around, trying to see if they could.

[B]

That would be me again.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know if they really found anything, but I would absolutely do that. I'd be like, you better restrain me.

[B]

You don't want me to go back. Take your hoverboard backpack and fly over there, just like a little drone, just to take a few pictures.

[A]

You know what? That was perfect timing for him to send something like that.

[B]

Seriously, he's like. He's like, feeling the UFO vibes in.

[A]

Case you ever need to iron man through the sky and find a ufo. And then all of a sudden, you're the ufo, you know.

[B]

That's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. I just pulled up a picture of it just because I'm like, yeah, kind of. It's wild. It literally looks like an apartment, but like, not a metal one. It looks like yellow. Or is that just what they.

[A]

Is it in. Does it look like it's a recent picture?

[B]

Yeah. Is this like a monument or something? Okay, gotcha, gotcha.

[A]

And also, remember, it was like, apparently huge. Like, huge.

[B]

The shape of it is wild, though. Yeah, you're right. It literally looks like an ac.

[A]

They were. Some were also calling it like a bell shaped craft. And everyone was like, it's an acorn.

[B]

It's literally an acorn. I mean, and the bigger part is on the bottom. So, like.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, like an upside. Right. Right side up acorn.

[B]

It's sort of an upside down acorn. Because usually what makes it from the top.

[A]

I was gonna say what makes it upside down, but I guess you're right.

[B]

Well, they hang from. From the stem. So it's sort of like where the stem would be is the other side.

[A]

Right. But I would almost assume that's right side up because it's like, it's a little tushy is sitting on the ground. Listeners, weigh in, Wouldn't that be its head? I don't know. Listeners, which one's the head and which one's the tushy on an acorn?

[B]

We're not scientists. Okay. Sheesh.

[A]

Anyway, what a lot of people said is even more jarring than the actual UFO incident or seeing something fall out of the sky and fire. What was more jarring to a lot of people was just how quickly the military appeared.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, that.

[A]

Eerie how fast they showed up.

[B]

Well, you got Canada reporting sightings. You got Ohio, Ohio, Indiana. So it's probably been crashing for a while or slowly descending on fire for a while. So I guess they probably had like a couple hours to get people.

[A]

Yeah, I don't know.

[B]

A couple hours. Maybe not. I don't know.

[A]

And I wonder how many. How many phone calls until the military shows up in like 10 minutes or less? Because.

[B]

Right, like, who. What's the secret line where it's like, there's no questions, just be at these coordinates, you know, it's like, hey, actually.

[A]

This is getting out of sorts.

[B]

And how do they even track it with? I guess just. That's just crazy.

[A]

Especially if it's a UFO and like, not our technology. So how would they be able to find.

[B]

Maybe they've got eyes on It. Like, radar on it or something.

[A]

Well, hold that thought. God damn it, Christine, what can I say? You should. I really think, like, if there was such a thing as, like. Like, ghost hunters, but, like, for alien.

[B]

Like, oh, they're gonna say, like. But for UFOs. I don't know what I thought you were gonna say. Well, I think for geniuses. That's what I thought you were gonna say.

[A]

Right, right, right. I think you should be, like, an active UFO investigator. Because the way this out is crazy.

[B]

Listen, it's just, like. It makes sense to me, you know, I'm like. I got. I get it.

[A]

It's just a gift. God gave it to me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm a victim here.

[B]

I'm just a Pleiadian.

[A]

So, yeah, the military showed up really quickly. Within an hour, local police, state police, and the US army were in Kecksburg, roping off the woods and setting up roadblocks. Reporters tried asking officials what was going on, because, of course, if everyone's there, the reporters are there, too. And actually, one reporter, I forget his name. I think it was John Murphy. He claims that he was one of the first people to be on the scene before the military got there. And he was able to get pictures of this thing. And then they were later confiscated.

[B]

Of course they were.

[A]

But he did later end up. It inspired him to, like, make his own radio docudrama about. I think it was. I forget what it was called, but he ends up doing, like. Like, a whole series where it was inspired by these events. Okay. So, yeah, the local police, state police, US army all show up. They're, like, sealing off the area. Reporters are trying to ask the officials what's going on. They're left with only more questions. Authorities say that military engineers and scientists were on the way, which, like, the fact that authorities are saying that to the public is crazy. Yep. Some locals actually claim that they were told the area was only sealed off just in case of radioactivity, which does admit that something odd's going on. Like, if you're gonna say something radioactive might be here, you're telling the public that something.

[B]

Yeah. Although you could pitch it as like, this is a foreign invasion type thing or like a terrorism type angle.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Not that that's, like, less scary. Right. But. But I don't know.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know. All I know is that they were. Some people were told to back off because it might be radioactive. And I would imagine it would work, though.

[B]

It would work, though. We'd all be like, oh, I don't care. What it is, get me away. The radioactive acorn. I mean, really?

[A]

Others claim that the military and then men in trench coats essentially told them nothing to see here and then told them that they needed to leave, which is kind of what this firefighter or said. But if you're telling everybody if as you're sealing off the area, something radioactive might be here, military engineers and scientists are on the way. And then also another group of people are like, nothing to see here. It's like, what?

[B]

Yeah, immediate, immediate, gigantic blaring siren red flags, right?

[A]

Especially for this one kid named John Hayes. Because John Hayes, he happened to live in a farmhouse with his family, which overlooked the woods pretty perfectly. And the military somehow knew this. I don't know how. I don't know if they had maybe just a general map of the area or what, but he remembers, and his parents remember someone knocking on the door and it's the military.

[B]

Don't answer the door ever. I'm telling you, it's never a good thing.

[A]

But military, they moved into their house for the night and used it as their home base while they started an investigation.

[B]

Isn't that literally in the Constitution? Pretty sure, you know that you can Army. Yeah, right. Like that. The army can just move in. And I remember in fifth grade learning that and going, hey, does anybody else find that a little problematic? Everyone's like, I'd give my house to the army. And I was like, congratulations. Yeah, I hope a flying acorn lands in your backyard then.

[A]

Well, John Hayes's family said that I wonder honestly if it was an alien investigation. I think I'd be too nosy. I'd be like, move in quick.

[B]

Oh, yeah. If they were just not investigating me and investigating the flaming acorn, I'd probably be like, like, I'll just sit over here while you do your work.

[A]

However, we are now outwardly publicly admitting that if anyone ever wants to investigate us, they just have to knock on the door and say that we think there was an alien. Can we come in?

[B]

Yeah. I mean, honestly, if they hadn't picked up on that by now, their sources aren't that good. So.

[A]

Yeah, well, it worked for John Hayes's family. I don't know if they wanted them there, but they seem to be fine with it. Basically, they just all moved in and remember, wall to wall military. So this is actually a quote from John. I think he was like 10 when this happened. He said, the first thing they did was tell my parents to send the it. The first thing they did was tell my parents to send Us kids to bed. Well, naturally, I was.

[B]

First of all, I'd be like, you. You don't get to tell my kids to go to bed. They'd be like. They'd move out in five. They'd move out in five seconds. They'd be like, this is not the. We're gonna put a tent outside.

[A]

The military would move in and then move out when I ask too many questions.

[B]

What are you doing?

[A]

What are you doing?

[B]

Be like, can I offer you lemonade? And they're like, no, again, no.

[A]

John says, well, naturally, I was excited by all the goings on, and our bathroom was downstairs, so I made quite a few trips to the bathroom.

[B]

You're, like, brushing your teeth really slowly. 1.

[A]

Yeah, one stroke at a time. There were a lot of men in uniforms, and there were some men in suits. And it was clear that the men in suits were in charge of everything. They were over the top. They were. Oh, they were over top of the military, and they had a lot of clout. I couldn't see down into the hollow where they were at, but I did see six guys in radiation suits take a box down there, and I didn't see them bring it out.

[B]

Yeah. Testing for. Oh, my God. That's so freaky.

[A]

His mom. I think it was his mom. Yeah. Yes. I think his mom, she was quoted saying the military was coming in and out of the house all evening, and they were making a lot of phone calls, and they were on their phone, and they were standing around in groups talking. I have no idea who they telephoned, but no calls turned up on my bill.

[B]

God, you.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

That'S so gross. Why is it so freaky that they preemptively, like, canceled all the calls or they have some, like, thing to turn off the billing? Ew.

[A]

And also, it sounds like it's that easy to just not charge people.

[B]

Seriously. Also, what is the code? I'm just asking for a friend. Just kidding. As if anyone has a landline. But still fascinating. And also the fact that. Oh, don't you wish at that point that you'd gotten the bonus landline phone for upstairs? And you're like, I just want to pick it off the receiver and listen.

[A]

My dream is that they forgot to, like, like, pull one of the landlines out of the wall, and we just still get free calls for the rest of the.

[B]

Oh, that's good. Yeah. Just be like, there's one thing before you leave.

[A]

Yeah, you can. You can use our house whenever you want for alien investigations, but we get free phone calls for the rest of our lives.

[B]

It just like their numbers now, just like CIA, it's just. Yeah, well.

[A]

So John also was later quoted saying, I know I'll probably never get a straight answer, but I know they went down in to the hollow where they saw this thing. They went down in with an empty truck and they came out with something on the back of it.

[B]

Was it a giant acorn?

[A]

Well, in fact, many people ended up reporting seeing the military leaving town with a flatbed truck carrying something the size of a car under a tarp. The investigation, or military search, whatever you want to call it, was over by 1:00am so they were only there for five hours.

[B]

Whoa, they are speedy.

[A]

And by the next day, the newspapers were obviously calling this a UFO crash landing.

[B]

Obviously, because it is.

[A]

I mean, even the reporters were there being like, this is crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's actually unknown for sure what would have happened once the UFO was taken, like where it would have gone next. But one former Air Force member came out saying that he knows the UFO was taken from that area to Lockbourne Air Force Base and then to Wright Patterson Air Force Base.

[B]

And he knows that's where my mommy worked.

[A]

He knows that because he claims he was the one responsible for guarding it while it was at one of the bases.

[B]

Sometimes I'm like, mom, look around. And she's like, okay. And I'm like, look for alien clues.

[A]

She's probably made this far by knowing to keep her eyes shut.

[B]

She's like, fair enough. Being on a green card for so many years, I think probably gave her a little bit of that hyper vigilance. Yeah, I know.

[A]

Nothing.

[B]

Yeah, nothing, Nothing, nothing.

[A]

As for what this thing could have been, if it exists, if it existed at all, Some think it could have been a test rocket, but both the Coast Guard and the Air Force say that they didn't launch any rockets. Which is what?

[B]

Radioactive for fun?

[A]

Right, Right. So the army, the Air Force and the Coast Guard have all been involved in this at this point.

[B]

Which is wild, huh? They're all blaming each other. Like, no, it's just the Coast Guard. No, it's just the Navy. Like, okay, and.

[A]

But you're right, like, interesting that they said it was radioactive. Now they're saying, well, maybe it was our own test rocket. But then someone's saying, no, it wasn't a test rocket at all. Soil analysis did suggest that something odd was going on over there, but it was nothing crash site worthy. Like there was. It was nothing that people would like.

[B]

The burn marks and stuff in the other places.

[A]

It Was that just looked like a.

[B]

Normal burn mark or something?

[A]

I guess so. It was nothing to like write home about, I guess.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Trajectory analysis of this thing flying in the sky suggests that that nothing that was on our radars could have crashed here. Anything that was in the sky that night, even if it crash landed, it couldn't have landed in Ksburg, Pennsylvania.

[B]

Oh, okay, okay. Like physic, like, like physics wise. Okay, okay.

[A]

Others think that this could have been some sort of re entry vehicle into our atmosphere because those happen to be those. I'm. I'm taking it, I'm not saying the direct quote, but what I got out of the quote is that it might have been this exact type of re entry vehicle because those happen to be nuclear. So if it did crash land, it would explain why the military moves so fast to get it out of a town.

[B]

Okay, fair enough.

[A]

And also it might have been radioactive. It could have exploded, we don't know. So that's a good guess is like maybe it was something that we know could hurt everybody. But also if it was one of our re entry vehicles, and that's something that would have been on our radars and we just determined that nothing on our radars would have crash landed. Right. A lot of people thought that it could have been a Russian probe called the Cosmos 96, because that day.

[B]

I know, sounds so like futuristic for the, for the time.

[A]

For 65. Yeah, for 1965. The Cosmos 96.

[B]

Wow. It's like the Cosmo 3000, you know?

[A]

Yeah. One day when the year 3000 hits, all of our stuff is not going to to be cool anymore.

[B]

Oh, it's so sad.

[A]

I wonder what the cool year in the year 3,000 will be. It's got to be 10,000 at that point. Make it five.

[B]

Five at least. Yeah, five or ten.

[A]

Well, so a lot of people thought it might be this Russian probe, the Cosmos 96, because that actually is a satellite that re entered the atmosphere.

[B]

That's okay.

[A]

However, it re entered at three in the morning, not five at night.

[B]

Oh, okay, okay, okay.

[A]

Plus, there's no way as it was re entering our atmosphere, it would not have landed in Pennsylvania.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, that's the part that I'm kind of caught up. Or caught up by. Caught up. Caught. Forget it, Forget it.

[A]

Okay. So they determined, hey, it's not this Russian satellite. However, for some reason this part I'm very confused on why how this came to be. NASA later then tried to push that it actually was a Russian satellite, even though they already pushed prove that that's not true. And then they also said. They also gave. They said later. Well, you know, there's more information about it that we haven't told anybody, but the documents have been misplaced, so. How convenient.

[B]

So, yeah, we're NASA. We messed up and lost all the paperwork. Okay, sure. I believe that. That feels like you sent someone to the moon.

[A]

NASA should at least have a. Like, a one pager with bullets on, like, every day. Every day of the. The calendar year. And it just says yes or no if there was a UFO that day.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Because then. And then just save that.

[B]

Well, it'll say no every day. Right? Because, like, that's just what they have to say. So they should remind. Remind themselves. You're supposed to say no.

[A]

You think someone has the Cliff Notes of, like, oh, yeah, that was a bad day. This was a good day.

[B]

Oops.

[A]

So anyway, after lawsuits to NASA to release the actual documents and conduct a research on the missing ones, they ended up providing new information. But according to one investigator named Leslie Keane, there was no smoking gun. So even though they gave us more information, they really didn't give us more information.

[B]

Hey, that sounds familiar.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

What do you mean, what do I mean?

[A]

Like, it's almost as if before today, other people have told government organizations to release the files. And then they said, well, it's real, but then it's not. But then it's real, but then it's not. But then it's missing. Oh, and now we can't find it. Actually, we don't know what's going on.

[B]

NASA says no.

[A]

Anyway, they. Yes. So release the files. That's the main moral of this.

[B]

And I'm talking the Kecksberg files. Okay, people?

[A]

So they ended up, yeah, giving more information, but the information was. The only new information they really gave was that they confirmed that NASA did, quote, play a role in the recovery and examination of space object debris.

[B]

Huh. Interesting.

[A]

So it does confirm that they collected something while they were there, but it doesn't say what to any real degree.

[B]

But it's from space.

[A]

But it's from space. This whole lawsuit debacle. This is like, I'm really just to save time, not even getting into the drama of this, but it's very interesting. This whole lawsuit debacle was sponsored by the SIFI network.

[B]

I thought you're gonna say, like, sponsored by Crest. And I was, like, sponsored by.

[A]

And that's why we drink. Promo code.

[B]

Drink. I wish.

[A]

So one of the reasons a lot of people don't believe, like, the the files ended up saying, oh, NASA picked up space debris. They're like, oh, this might have been a publicity stunt.

[B]

Like, Sci Fi Network was like, we want to make this as interesting as possible.

[A]

Sort of. Maybe I wait, but what year was this? 2000. From 2000. So in 2003, the Sifi. Sifi network came out with a. One of the documentaries I was trying to watch and didn't get enough time to do. It's called the New Roswell Kecksburg Exposed. And while doing. I think during that time, they had an investigator working with them named Leslie King and was. She was trying to get more information, and she basically ended up using, like, the Freedom of foia.

[B]

Foia, I don't know. Freedom of Information Act.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I was like, what? Yes. Good job, Christine. They were trying to use that to help in their lawsuit to get more of the documents released. And I guess Sci Fi, the network decided that they were going to help pay for, I think, the lawyers or something.

[B]

So this was like, later. I thought this was like, back in the 60s. I'm like, they had the Sci Fi Network back.

[A]

Okay. So I think this all came out when Sci Fi was trying to come out with a documentary, and then they were trying to get more information, at least around the time I think the documentary had already come out. And they were still like, just in the middle of this, you know, hullabaloo of trying to get more information in case they wanted to, I don't know, make another one. I. I'm a little confused about the. The timeline here, but I know that from 2003 to 2007 is when all this happened.

[B]

Okay. Also, I want to say Leslie Keane, I knew she was familiar. She wrote the book Surviving Death, which I have read. It's really interesting. But she's not investigator. She's a journalist. Like, she's not a police investigator or anything like that.

[A]

No, but she's. But she is called in a lot of sources. An investigative reporter.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay, cool.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

So, yeah, yeah, I'm just confirming.

[A]

But anyway, it was Leslie Keane and the SIFI Network versus NASA, I guess.

[B]

Yeah, good luck.

[A]

And they ended up getting information, but who knows if it was all the information or just some of the information.

[B]

Or they just, like, did something to appease them and. Yeah, right. Cobbled something together.

[A]

And then even if they gave them anything that was helpful, people still said, well, this could be a publicity stuff for Sci Fi. Exactly. Anyway, all that to say, most people think that this was a natural experience, AKA it was a meteor.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[A]

Which would explain the small fires that broke apart. That broke apart, slowly fell onto the ground. Others say that it couldn't be a meteor because meteors, as you mentioned, don't move. The way that this thing was moving in the sky, it was just like.

[B]

A left turn out of Canada.

[A]

Yeah, I guess, really slowing down as it fell. Some people were saying it was gliding in the air.

[B]

Right side, butt side up.

[A]

Right side up. And despite all this, you know the arguments against this, a lot of skeptics, including the Pentagon and Project Blue Book themselves, they seem skeptics.

[B]

Including the Pentagon, Yeah.

[A]

You have to hope they're skeptics.

[B]

You'd have to have someone. Yeah, if anyone.

[A]

While it's officially deemed a meteor, many locals and witnesses remain convinced it was a ufo. It's still discussed in the town today, apparently. I. I like to imagine that there's somebody with, like, a bumble profile in that area who's like, you. Tell me what you think happened at Kexper.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, you'll. We'll get along if. Dot, dot, dot. I haven't been on a dating app in two decades or something, but ye. You will get along if you think Kecksburg was something like that. Radioactive alien material.

[A]

Well, like many locals, there's one UFO researcher named Stan Gordon, and he is very hesitant to believe what the government has to say about it. This is a long quote, but a good quote to end on, of what Stan thinks happened here.

[B]

Tell me what Stan thinks.

[A]

Within several miles of the crash site, multiple witnesses tell us that this object was coming in at a very, very slow speed of descent. Meteors do not make controlled turns. They do not come in at a slow speed. Like they, in fact, do not glide, in which this thing apparently did. There is no entry at all for the day. There is no entry at all for that day. In the December log of all activities for the radar squadron. That tells us somebody apparently wanted to keep all the information associated with this involvement in that site away from public information. See, the report indicated that there was quite a lot of interest by government agencies as to what the object might have been. There were memos there and requests for information from Houston Space center, from norad, from the Air Force Command Post, the Pentagon, even the chairman of the Office of Emergency Planning requested information.

[B]

See, and then they're like, it's just a rock.

[A]

And then Stan says, either we're dealing with some highly advanced space probe, or the possibility exists that we may indeed be dealing with an extraterrestrial Spacecraft. So even he's like, come on. If you all want this so bad, you obviously.

[B]

Seriously.

[A]

So New Year's Eve 1990, Unsolved Mysteries puts out an episode. Oh, yes. This event is what garnered this case to have UFO real fame outside of the town. And for the episode, Unsolved Mysteries actually built a life size replica of the acorn shaped ufo.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[A]

And they use it in the show for the re dramatization, but when they were done with filming, they gifted it to the town.

[B]

That is so fun.

[A]

And so you can go see what is now called the space Acorn. And there's also a UFO store in Kecksburg for tourists, so.

[B]

Well, well, well, well. That's about four hours from me. So let's get started on that drive.

[A]

Well, you could figure out a plan to go in the summer, because every summer, the fire department, the volunteer fire department, puts out an annual UFO festival.

[B]

I love that the fire department's like, even we understand that.

[A]

This is like, we were the first ones there.

[B]

And seriously, we saw what we saw.

[A]

Apparently, there's a parade, there's a fireworks show. They hold a conference with UFO speakers. And so that was all I could get on Kecksburg incident. But if you would like to watch some of the documentaries or watch some of the things that I either got to watch or will be watching, there's Unsolved Mysteries. I think it was season three, episode one. Then there's the SIFI documentary, the New Roswell Kecksburg Exposed. Then there's a documentary called Kecksburg the Untold story secrets of UFOs, America's other Roswell. And then Discovery Channel and History Channel both have their own series too. There's UFO Hunters, Ancient Aliens, and Nazi UFO Conspiracy. Cool, because one of the theories is that this thing might have actually been one of the Nazi UFOs called the bell or Die Glock.

[B]

Yeah. Here, here, here. I got something for you.

[A]

We started at Nazi UFO Conspiracy. What are you gonna say?

[B]

I was gonna sing you a song, but I think maybe I'm not gonna do that anymore. I was gonna sing you a nice Christmas song about bells, because that means the bell. Yeah. And so I was like, oh, I have songs about Christmas bells.

[A]

And then I was like, well, you have to now.

[B]

Well, I don't know anymore how it goes.

[A]

Oh, that's magic. That's very.

[B]

I just accidentally forgot about how it goes. Do you want me to sing in Flemish, though? Because it could do that again.

[A]

I've heard too much of that from you. The Flemish song. I still have somewhere. There's like video of you doing that in there.

[B]

Hi, Marie. Yes, there is.

[A]

Yeah. Oh my gosh. I. The. Well done. You sang the whole thing. It was like a six minute song or something.

[B]

It like was not correct either. I'm sure, I'm sure it just sound. I mean, listen, it was my attempt at it, but I'm sure it sounded like gibberish.

[A]

I wouldn't know. It sounded great.

[B]

Thank you so much.

[A]

Well, anyway, that's another topic I'll be covering at some point. The. Say it again.

[B]

Diag Dia. Gl. Yeah, it's hard because this has an.

[A]

Omni, but apparently that is a whole Nazi. Something ufo. Where apparently it has to do with time travel, which, like the irony, because couldn't we use that and go back and get rid of the Nazis anyway?

[B]

Oh, I see. Maybe it's the Glock. I thought gluck. I meant now I just want to make sure I'm not like butchering my own native tongue.

[A]

All I know is in the US of A. Baby, that's called the bell.

[B]

Huh.

[A]

Okay, I'll be covering that at some point. Anyway. They. A lot of people thought that that might be what this was.

[B]

My computer's like, I know you're trying to talk about UFOs and I'm like, just tell me how to say bell in German.

[A]

Anyway, that is the Kecksburg incident.

[B]

That's. Oh, it is Glocke. Sorry, Die Glocke, not glocke. I don't know what I was saying.

[A]

I feel like when I do cover it, I'll just have to like bleep out my mouth and you just say say the glocker every time. Apparently.

[B]

That was good that you literally said it more correctly than I said it the first time because I thought that's why I was saying it is like the diminutive of like the like. You know when you say like. You know when you add like a little twist to the end of a word to make it like kind of cutesy. Like people call me like my dad would always call me Christine Hin. Like it.

[A]

Yeah, so.

[B]

So you add. Anyway, that's why I said it like that.

[A]

It's like. Is it like in Spanish when you put ito at the end?

[B]

Yes, yes, that was what I was trying to think of. The Spanish Ito. Yes, exactly. That's my attempt to walk myself out of saying a very obvious German word incorrectly.

[A]

Again, I wouldn't know. So if I'm the only one currently here, and I would have Been impressed either way.

[B]

I appreciate that always and forever. Thank you.

[A]

Yeah. Anyway.

[B]

What the dude. Okay, so I have a question because I can't stop thinking about the. These hieroglyphic symbols on the side. Is this something that anybody has recreated? Like is this something where they're like oh, I remember what some of them.

[A]

Looked like, you know, not what I saw. I just kind of saw. I read the description about just having like stars and circles and lines which doesn't look like. That doesn't sound like hieroglyphics to me. That just sounds like shapes. But I guess.

[B]

But like look at the, the re. Reenact. The recreation of it has all these symbols on it and I wonder if they made those up up or if it was like to like copy a certain.

[A]

Yeah, I don't know.

[B]

Cuz they do have these like really wild looking symbols on it and I'm like, I don't know where they came up with that if they don't know what it actually looked like.

[A]

You know, I bet it was in that one documentary. I didn't have time to look.

[B]

Okay, fair enough. I should not put you on the spot. I just can't get over it. I, I mean, what do you think? Do you have an opinion? Because I do.

[A]

I mean I think it was something weird for every. It seems space themed organization in our government to be curious about it and then magically have.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Files that they can't release or have been misplaced. And then they're also telling people nothing to see here. And I mean don't be certainly ridiculous. Certainly.

[B]

Actually let me use your landline real quick to call the government. To call the president. Okay.

[A]

Yeah. And also, also how cool is that to know that your phone might have called the president.

[B]

Yeah. But you can't prove it because they didn't bill you for it.

[A]

Yeah, you know what? That's exactly right.

[B]

I'm sending you this picture because look at these creepy symbols on it.

[A]

I do think, I think it was like the little kid John Hayes or something. He did say if there was nothing, if it was nothing, why didn't you just like let everyone see what it was?

[B]

Seriously, if it's just a big rock and then it's not radioactive, like if.

[A]

It was a meteor, like wouldn't the like you have had the local press come out and take pictures of like a meteor shower and like we all got to like take a picture with a meteor here.

[B]

Especially if you're the government and you're so relieved it's not a crashed Alien. And you're like, thank God we don't have to cover this up, you know?

[A]

Oh, wow. These do. These are very.

[B]

Isn't that weird? They're, like, so, so detailed, these symbols.

[A]

Yeah, I don't know what that's about, but I do. I really got it handed to Unsolved Mysteries to let them have the.

[B]

What else are they gonna do with it? Fly it to LA on fire?

[A]

Part of me wonders, like, what. What is it made of? Because if it was made in the 90s for, like, an episode of something, it might just be Styrofoam. And I'm so impressed with how.

[B]

Stayed together about to say it's guaranteed something like that. Like, they must have, like, spackled over it just to keep it, right. Just, like, spray it with a bunch of, like, whatever Gina put all over my dead bugs. Oh, poor Gina. I'm, like, looking at pictures. I mean, it's really. And if you look at it sideways, somebody made, like, a drawing of it sideways. It does look like a saucer. Like, almost like a UFO saucer when it's sideways because it's like the bump with the. You know, it looks sort of that shape. Shape.

[A]

Yeah, it looks like so weird. Part of it's, like, a little too tall, and one part's not wide enough, but it looks like a squished in some way. Ufo.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And nobody's telling me about the symbols, which is just going to drive me nuts. But I know, right? Maybe I'll watch Siffy. Oh, by the way, we say that if you're new here, first of all, wow, you've been through an episode today. But second of all, you can explain him.

[A]

It's just. It's the Sci Fi Network, but my dad always called it Sifi, so it's now lovingly called Sifi over here.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. From. From day one. And was like, oh, I don't want to correct him.

[A]

I didn't have the heart. Or I just. Maybe he knew and he just played it off so confidently that now I'm a confused one.

[B]

I think probably that's not the case.

[A]

I don't know. I don't know which one it is, but I don't want to find out.

[B]

At this point, most grown adult men who pronounce Siffy. Whatever, I don't know. Listen, I'm no scientist, you know, I. I know nothing.

[A]

I know nothing.

[B]

So it was metallic, though, right? And you said it had no seams, but then they made the recreation out of, like, what Literally looks like.

[A]

Like clay.

[B]

Like foam or clay. It's weird.

[A]

Yeah. I. I do wonder how much of that is just like back in the day. A pixelated camera in the 90s wouldn't have even clocked half that detail. Maybe. Or maybe if we're serious about maybe it's now weatherproof. Maybe this is a new coating of something else.

[B]

They're like, let's paint it yellow.

[A]

Yeah, no, they did say it was like a. Like a metallic gold acorn.

[B]

Oh, okay. Well, so then actually in some lighting, I think it might be. Then they use. You're probably right that they just use certain, like, camera or lighting because, like, look at this picture and it.

[A]

This is like kind of a. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Saturated, but it looks like shiny gold almost, which.

[A]

Yeah, it looks like a brushed bronze or something.

[B]

Yes, that's right. Brushed bronze. My least favorite of the. Of the sink finishes.

[A]

Interesting. I don't know what's the one where it's the brush and it's like kind of black but also metal. I hate that one.

[B]

I thought that was brushed bronze. Maybe.

[A]

I don't like, like it. I don't.

[B]

I don't either. Brushed copper, perhaps?

[A]

I like copper.

[B]

I just don't like, like, don't pretend that it's old or something. It's just so weird to me. I'm like, come on. Like, I was so excited when I moved into my house and some stuff here is so old. It's like a house from 1860s. And then like 99 of it is just junk from home goods that was like, glued to the wall to look old timey. And I'm like, come on.

[A]

Well, that's what I can't stand. I really can't stand the farmhouse look.

[B]

Which is why, like, this, the rustic boho chic thing.

[A]

Well, it's like you. It's obviously not a farm baby.

[B]

It's really annoying. I find it annoying. I'm like, if you're gonna go antique, like, don't fake it. I don't know. You can find actual old for really cheap.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Like. Like, for example, my bathroom, there's like this like, toilet paper holder, and it's like this bronze plaque and it says, like, Paper Company, 1860 something. And I was like, that's so cool. Like, I wonder if this is a thing. And I Google it and it's like, immediately off on Lowe's or Wayfair, and I'm like, okay, so it's some junkie thing.

[A]

There's only. Sorry. A motorcycle decided to Go at lightning speed. The one thing that. I don't care if it's tacky, I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I. Even though it's fake, I don't care. It just does something to a room, to me. I love an exposed beam.

[B]

Oh, I love an exposed beam.

[A]

I don't even care.

[B]

Fake that well. Okay. Yeah, you can.

[A]

They do some pretty. Pretty incredible fake beams these days.

[B]

Days. Yeah, but see, I feel like that's at least like an aesthetic choice rather than like I'm pretending like this is an antique. Like a. Like a. Yeah, I'm from a time. I mean, again, like, as if I have any. Like, my room is literally has dirty cheez. Its all over the floor. I'm not saying I have any better taste than anyone. I just.

[A]

I am. Exposed beams are incredible. And everything else can go.

[B]

You know what I love is an exposed brick.

[A]

Oh, don't even start with me on an exposed brick. Oh, don't even.

[B]

That was the thing.

[A]

You know what I don't miss, though? Or miss? I've never had exposed brick. The one thing I don't ever wish is having to nail something in.

[B]

Oh, I've been there. I purchased these things that you hook into the. Onto the brick, and they, like, kind of clasp on. They don't. They don't work as well as I'd hoped.

[A]

I mean, I guess, like, it's just a. You just got to get some masonry stuff, I guess. But I don't really want to have to.

[B]

I'm not. Yeah, no. I've tried to put stuff in the brick, and it did not go well.

[A]

I. I've had to drill into concrete, and it is not fun. Not fun. So I agree. I think you're right to not want to touch that.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

Christine. Now that it's 20, 26, she's on the way. I want to have like, a signature little smell. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Oh, I love. I've always wanted that.

[A]

The idea of getting a scent is so stressful because it can be really expensive for a whole bottle. And what if you hate it and it's just. It's not worth it half the time. Time.

[B]

I know. And then you don't really know. And if you wear it a couple days and you're like, I'm over it. It's like, oh, good, I have $140 of it left. No, it's. We've been there. That's why we're so excited to talk About Micro Perfumes. Oh my gosh. I went, okay, let me tell you about it first. For just a few bucks, you can test drive the real deal. They have Dior, Tom Ford Creed, for example. I got this Lancome perfume that I had smelled actually on someone in when I was in Egypt. And they were like, oh, it's this perfume. And I was like, what? I'm not gonna go buy that. It's so expensive. But then I ordered like a little vial to try it on myself. And now I like considering that as my, as my little scent du jour, if you will. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

That's microperfumes.com Drink for up to 60% off. Micro perfumes. Real sense. No regrets.

[B]

Hello everyone. We're back. This is one of my favorite stories and weirdly enough, doesn't contain a murder.

[A]

Oh, thank God.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Wow. Finally some banter in this place.

[B]

Happy Thanksgiving. This is a good one for banter. Okay. This is the story of Lawrence Joseph Bader. And I hadn't heard of the story. And it's one of those where I thought, well, surely I've heard of every like completely insane mystery case you know from. But no, this one I've never heard of. I. I hope I'm not the only one because it felt like totally obscure to me. But I listened to an episode of by the way trying to redeem myself. Again, stuff you should know, not things you should know. Which is what I called the podcast last time. Really embarrassing. Everybody corrected me and said you. They did not say you owe them an apology, but I felt that I owed them an apology.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

So stuff you should know did a really good episode. I also watched episode of scary interesting on YouTube and then read some very colorful journalism from the 60s about this.

[A]

Colorful journalism tells me that. Did they say a bad word or something in there?

[B]

You know, it's just like when they say things about like people, like when you say things not racist, but like, I don't know that that's relevant. I don't know that like how she looks or how he talks. It just feels like how all of.

[A]

Our parents would just randomly like overly describe people where it's like, oh my.

[B]

God, have you seen those? TikTok? Of course you have. But they're like my mom talking about anyone I went to high school with. Like, you know, the one with the huge nose. And it's like, why, like, you can just say their name. You don't need to like, give them a derogatory description.

[A]

Why are we describing them in all the ways they'd be so embarrassed by?

[B]

Exactly. Like, why are we describing them by their insecurities Cover covered in moles.

[A]

It's like, what?

[B]

You know that freckly girl. It's like, what the.

[A]

You couldn't say the one with the lovely eyes exactly.

[B]

Or like the beautiful freckles, you know? No. Yeah. No, no. They couldn't beat that. So Lawrence Joseph Bader. He was born in Akron, Ohio. This is of course an ohio story. In 1926. And he came from a pretty well to do family. One of his uncles was an Akron city councilman. And so he grew up like, not really wanting for anything. He did a stint in the Navy and then did like a semester at college. But neither of these felt fulfilling enough for him. And he actually became known as the guy who tried many get rich quick schemes. Love that, Love that. Yeah. So I was stuff you should know. They were like, they were like, if you're known for your get rich quick schemes one semester into college, like, you must be really into them. And the other guy goes, oh. Or they could be looking at his suit covered in dollar signs. Like, maybe he walked around with a dollar sign suit. That's the only other way it screams get rich quick.

[A]

I. I'm on board with the first year that he's either really good or really bad at this.

[B]

Yes, exactly. It's like that. It just feels like maybe not the best descriptor of a you'd want to get.

[A]

Right?

[B]

But you know, that was just his vibe. He was like, I can get money from my dad. I don't really need to spend time in college. And. And I'd rather just find an easy way to make this work. Neither of these plans really worked out, and he eventually became a cookware salesman for the Reynolds Metals company. He made. Made a pretty good salary, I think in today's money. It's like 120k a year.

[A]

Dang.

[B]

I know. And he married a woman named Mary lou. And by 1957 they had three children with a fourth on the way. He was known as a pretty quiet guy, pretty reserved, but he did have some outgoing sensibilities, especially with his friends. Friends, he had one party trick where he would eat an entire roast chicken, bones and all.

[A]

Oh, my God. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Okay, see, I'm. I am locked in now because you. You mentioned the bone. I really just want to watch him eat a skeleton. That's kind of. I don't care.

[B]

Okay, well, apparently people do, because I'm like. Like, you eating all is. You just. Are you also, like, vamping? Are you, like. And watch this. You know, I mean, it's like a whole chickfila chicken.

[A]

Like, the chicken part I'm on. I could also eat a whole roasted street chicken and have.

[B]

No, he just, like, bites it. Like, eats it, is what I'm saying. Like, he takes the roast chicken with the bones inside it and just will, like.

[A]

Like. So he eats like a wolf eat, like.

[B]

Yeah, like. Like a dog. Yeah, like a wolf. Like, eats a whole thing.

[A]

I mean, I do. What if that. If that party trick video. I mean, also a party trick where you.

[B]

You could not pay me to watch that.

[A]

Well, I was thinking, like, the caloric intake and the way that the bones are gonna rip you from the inside out.

[B]

No. You know, when they get all mushy.

[A]

I. I did mix it at least once. I would like to. I'd like to go to a party and at least watch three.

[B]

So you're. The problem is what you're saying. Because I really want none of this. I want none of this to exist ever.

[A]

I need to see it with my own eyes, and not because I don't believe it, but purely because you need to, just for the visual.

[B]

Yeah, I get it. So beside the chicken trick, he was pretty reserved. He had the trickin the chicken. No.

[A]

Okay, sorry.

[B]

He. He was pretty chill. He had some friends, and he was, like, kind of a nice guy, but he. He wasn't anything like any eccentric or. Or boisterous kind of person. He also had a bit of growing financial stress. IRS liens had been placed against him for unpaid taxes. He apparently didn't pay his taxes for, like, five years. And he had recently received notices related to his debt, which was about $2,400, and in today's money is about $24,000. And so it's a significant amount of debt, but not, like, extreme. You know, like, to the point that we've seen some of these big, like, family annihilator cases and things like that.

[A]

Right.

[B]

In other words, nothing in his behavior in early March 1957 suggested he planned any extreme action or planned to disappear in any way. And yet. Let's go to March 15, 1957.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Larry tells his wife, Mary Lou that he has an IRS meeting in Cleveland the next morning. And he says afterwards, I'm going to go fishing at Lake Erie Theory. And she says, please don't. I am pregnant with our fourth child. I would really like you to come home after work. And this guy says, maybe I will, maybe I won't. Oh, okay. Had the same reaction, went cool guy.

[A]

Okay, well then just don't come home at all.

[B]

Okay, yeah, go yourself. I guess so. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. And then he pieces out, and guess what? He will. He goes to the IRS meeting, He gets out several thousand dollars in cash, which, which was the plan. It's not like he did that on a whim. And then he rents a 14 foot aluminum boat and purchases fishing gear, including a life jacket and extra oars. He's getting this boat ready to go into the water. It's in Rocky river near Cleveland. And the clerk says, hey, I don't know if you should be going out. There's going to be a storm coming through. And the clerk said he remembers. Remembered forever. What Larry said in response, he said, you never know unless you try.

[A]

This guy really is all about the risk, isn't he? With his get rich quick, his eating skeletons. He's just like, well, let's find out along the way.

[B]

Also, he's like trying to do these witty one liners. And I'm like, I feel like that doesn't even make sense.

[A]

He's waiting for a slogan to appear.

[B]

You know what, he's waiting for it to click. And I think he should try guy some more because this one didn't really work. But. So he takes the boat to Rocky river and he launches the boat. He's actually spotted by Coast Guard and they're like, hey, it's gonna be really bad weather. You better get out of here. And he's like, I'm fine. And just keeps going on his way. Lo and behold, there's a giant storm and high winds, rough waters. Larry never made it back with the boat.

[A]

And like a bigger boat or something, I feel like that'd be part of his lore.

[B]

He's. He comes back with no boat. He. He does not appear. He doesn't come home. And his wife is, of course, immediately worried. So the Coast Guard goes out, does a search. Wouldn't you know it, they find a boat washed up near Cleveland's Perkins Beach. In the boat they find the life jackets, which is interesting because he rented them. Clearly didn't Use them and one or two. And the boat itself didn't appear severely damaged, just, like, dinged up a little. But Larry and his suitcase, which contained the cash, was missing.

[A]

The suitcase is what's interesting, because if the suitcase weren't involved, I would have said this guy clearly thought, what's the big deal? I'm just gonna go take a dip real quick and then get back on the boat.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

The suitcase is interesting.

[B]

So the suitcase is interesting. And I also think, like, another devil's advocate sort of point has been made. Like, well, he probably didn't want to leave it in the car. It had several thousand dollars of cash. And I was like, okay, fair. I feel like, why would you go.

[A]

I mean, why would you bring it at all?

[B]

Well, because he was up in Cleveland, and so he's like, oh, I want to go fishing while I'm on the lake.

[A]

Oh, while he was there, right?

[B]

Yeah. So, like, I guess, you know, but it just feels a little odd that the. The guy and the suitcase are missing, but everything else appears to be.

[A]

My only justification at this point is like, maybe he was about to put it somewhere else and it fell off the bone. He went diving for it.

[B]

Oh, that's interesting. Interesting.

[A]

And then he just, like, couldn't get back.

[B]

Yeah. So, I mean, they couldn't find him. And so they. They searched for several days, the Coast Guard did, but they never found a body or any further evidence. So he was declared dead, legally dead. And that was May of 1957. He had left behind a pregnant wife and three young children. But within three or so days, the. The timeline varies. A few days of Larry's disappearance, a man calling himself John Johnson walks into the Round Table Bar in Omaha, Nebraska, holding a bartending manual and asking for a job. He claims his name is John Johnson on all his paperwork, leases, and official records. But socially, he introduces himself as Fritz without question.

[A]

I already know why this is your favorite fucking story. Because it's so catch me if you can.

[B]

Yeah. Yes, it is. Okay. I never didn't put that together, but you're totally right. Yes. Yes. You can't make this up. You know what I mean?

[A]

You love an identity switcher. I do.

[B]

I find it fascinating.

[A]

And a successful one. Like, one where you somehow were able to, like, get paperwork and like, that.

[B]

I mean, what? Like, it's like. It's like those guys at the Glowing Acorn that are like, we're in charge. Get out. And everyone's like, okay, you know, okay, John Johnson, Fritz. Whatever you want. Like, I'LL walk in there and say, I'm in charge. But, like, no one would believe me.

[A]

Know, because you'd go, if you don't mind.

[B]

Excuse me. Sorry. Can anyone hear me? Yeah. So he is friendly, sociable, loud, boisterous, eccentric, and he quickly becomes the talk of Omaha. Wouldn't that be a dream? I mean, yeah, actually, pretty soon he becomes like, basically a local celebrity. He develops this, like, not even notoriety, like, really just kind of fame in town as this eccentric guy. He actually had an active tumor behind his eye at the time, which required surgery, and so they actually had to remove his eye.

[A]

I literally what I think just like, people who have any sort of eye adjacent surgery are unsung heroes that need a lot more. A lot more applause.

[B]

Well, apparently it worked because he got an eye patch and people were like, we're so into this.

[A]

I. If someone ever has an eye anything, the respect goes sky high for me.

[B]

Have you ever seen that creator who, like, shows her different eyes that she puts in?

[A]

Sure have. Sure have. I just, I. I'll never. I'll never be comfortable. Comfortable with my own eyeballs. So the second that anyone's like, oh, yeah, someone had to touch them medically, I'm like, well, medically. Well, then I guess we're done here. I got you.

[B]

Well, apparently it was true. And he really did. It wasn't just like an eye patch accessory. Like, he actually did have. Have his eye removed. And so he wore this eye patch. And of course, this only added to his eccentricity in town. He also sported a neatly maintained pedal mustache, which was sometimes described as curled at the ends. So you can just picture this guy, like, pirate adjacent. You know, like, mustachioed man named Fritz. Like, he's just a goofball. And he wears these, like, bright colored jackets, colorful bow ties. Like, he's just this character. Character.

[A]

I do think he's kind of doing the identity thing wrong. Aren't you supposed to make, like, no big, big flary attentions?

[B]

Oh, you mean you're not supposed to become a local radio personality?

[A]

That's what I meant.

[B]

Yeah. Well, apparently he got the wrong rule book because he was described by folks as theatrical showman, like, or even my favorite vaudeville. Ready. Really good stuff.

[A]

Perfect.

[B]

Really good stuff. He took a bartending job at the Round table bar, and he performed small tricks to the clientele. He would spin bottles, he would flick ice. He would, like, deliver these spontaneous toasts for no reason. Like, some people, some sources said that he'd go to places like a car dealership was having like a ribbon cutting ceremony and he would like give an impromptu speech even though he had nothing to do with the car dealership.

[A]

Like, he's giving Michael Scott.

[B]

Yes. Okay. He's giving like I'm the center of attention. Right. And everyone's like, huh?

[A]

You know, he's really forcing the narrative.

[B]

That nobody's asking the, the, the, the stuff you should know. Folks made a really good point that he was not. Like, nobody looked down on him for like, nobody looked at him like in the Michael Scott, like, this guy, you know, not nobody. I wouldn't say that. But like, in general, he wasn't considered a creep. He wasn't considered like a freak. Like he was just like, oh, he's that sort of that quirky guy. I think we're into it.

[A]

I don't know if it's pretty. Privilege is popular privilege. I guess it's like if you have enough confidence and enough people backing you already saying that like you're vouched for, then you can really get away with it.

[B]

You can rock anything a lot. Yeah, exactly. And so, I mean, this guy is just like really involved in his community, I guess, to the point that he's giving like speeches at car dealerships. But he's also like a really conscientious customer and that kind of thing. He tips like 200 on all his bar tabs and bills. He writes. Okay. So some of the weird. I wanna, I wrote down some of the weird idiosyncrasies he had, the eccentricities. So for example, he wrote checks using the season instead of the date. So he, Instead of saying August 5th, he would write late summer.

[A]

That was a few weeks legal.

[B]

I know. This is the 1950s for you.

[A]

I see. Okay.

[B]

Again, it's the privilege of. This is how I do it. And everyone just has to kind of deal. Right?

[A]

Right.

[B]

And I feel like they, like people thought this was a fun little quirk. But then it's like, okay, but like, how annoying is that? Like, if you work at the bank. Right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Another thing he did is he would take the tips he received to the bank. He would get them in like a glass milk jug. And when he wrote like the deposit slip, he would write one quart of tip.

[A]

Now that's good.

[B]

And then make the teller count it when he left. Like, it's kind of rude.

[A]

I mean, it's rude, but I mean, like, if you want to stick out, maybe.

[B]

Yeah, clearly.

[A]

I mean, maybe that's part of why he's so remembered, because he's known as, like, that guy.

[B]

So weird. Like, he really does so many things that are like, ha.

[A]

Like, you know, there's one person in town who's like, why do we give this guy so much praise?

[B]

Like, does anybody else see, like, he.

[A]

Gave you a court of money and is asking you to kill. Count it now.

[B]

And makes you count it. Yeah, yeah. It's just weird. And so people were, like, obviously clocking all this behavior and were like, that's Fritz for you. He was very, very involved in the community. Like I said, he joined the Knights of Columbus. He participated in civic groups, charity activities, social events. He was very into volunteering. And his name, Fritz, became, like, kind of synonymous with his, like, quirky behavior. So people would know Fritz in all the different social circles. He often had people, a lot of ladies, over to his home, and at his home, he had no furniture. He only had cushions and beanbags. Like, it's a very bohemian vibe, I guess.

[A]

You know what? He's clear. I keep wanting to make fun of him, but he's clearly doing something right.

[B]

He's got a. He's got. He's sticking to a vibe, I guess He.

[A]

At the very least, the confidence is exuding, you know?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's some sort of power.

[B]

Power, yes, exactly. He actually, on that note, also drove a hearse as his vehicle. Okay.

[A]

I mean, the hearse and the beanbags are.

[B]

I. I'm almost very m. Coded to me. Yeah.

[A]

The chicken thing would really nail the. Nailed the coffin down. I would.

[B]

Yeah. Who would nail the coffin down?

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[B]

The back of the hearse. Yeah. So he had this hearse, and he had, like, a little lounge seating area in the back of the hearse, you know, for when the ladies came over and. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he actually got the car registered as a hunting vehicle.

[A]

This guy's really cool. I'm turning. I'm turning, I'm turning.

[B]

I know. Okay. And so when people ask, like, oh, where are you from? What's your backstory? He told, like, slightly contradicting stories, but he usually claimed he'd grown up in an orphanage, but he never cl. He never explained where it was. He also said he was one of, like, 24 kids named John Johnson or something like that. And people were like, okay, so the.

[A]

Orphanage was a cult.

[B]

I know, right? It sounds like it. Or just a really lazy. Yeah, we're all just gonna call you John Johnson. But then as for Fritz, he claimed that this was from a comic called Cats and Jammer Comic. And it. And. Or he also occasionally told a story that in his time in the Navy, that his haircut, he looked German, and so people nicknamed him Fritz. And so nobody really knew where the name came from, but it stuck. And so that's what he used to. One of the, like, most notable stunts that he pulled at this point is volunteering for a charity event that required. Have you ever heard of something called a publicity roost? Like, you did, like, sororities and stuff. So I don't know if this is a normal thing, but it sounds insane to me.

[A]

I don't. I don't know what that is.

[B]

That's good, because if you did, I would be worried. But it's basically where you live in a small box on top of a pole for several days.

[A]

No, but, you know, I do do it.

[B]

I know you're sick. Okay. So basically, he immediately volunteered. They needed someone to live in a small box for a few days, and he said, sure, I'll do it. So they hoist him up there into this enclosure. And he stayed there throughout the whole fundraiser. I think it was for polio, I believe. He waved to onlookers. He joked with photographers. He was, like, interacting with the crowds again, like, vamping. Friends used a pulley system to send supplies up to him, including newspapers, cigarettes, notes, sandwiches. I don't even want to know about the whole bathroom situation, but that's my first thought.

[A]

Have I. Sorry, finish your point. But I have a. A note to add to this.

[B]

Great. So the last thing I have to say is, according to multiple newspaper reports, his friends also use the pulley to send up martinis. Okay, go.

[A]

Okay. Okay. So. Very cool. Yeah, I. Allison and I went to a mini golf place in, I think, Newport or. Or Newport, California, or at least on the way.

[B]

I was like, Kentucky.

[A]

No, no, no. It was either in Newport or it was along the way back from Newport. And there's one hole that has what looks like a. Like, a cartoonish, like, tree house on the. On the. The hole. And it's just, like, overlooking you, this big tree house up in the air. And it has, like, you wouldn't even notice, but there's this little plaque that says, like, a world Guinness record was broken of, like, somebody living up there for a while, while. And I looked him up. No, that'd be crazy, though. But, no, I looked it up, and I guess it was, like, during an actor strike, and he was an actor, and he was hoping that it would, like, garner attention or, like, some sort of protest for him, and nobody really cared. It seems it was so sad. Although the town was really invested in this. And, like, a bunch of local restaurants started the, like, scheduling out which days each of the restaurants would go deliver him food and, like, in solidarity or something. And so every night, he had, like, a different restaurant, like, do a police system bring food up for him.

[B]

Oh, see, It's a thing. Yeah, I. I guess I also don't.

[A]

Know the bathroom situation, but he lived up there without coming down for, like, over a year.

[B]

A year. Okay.

[A]

It was crazy. Yeah.

[B]

Fritz could never. He was up there for, like, a few days. Okay. But I love that it's called a publicity roost.

[A]

I never heard that phrase before.

[B]

Before. I haven't either. And I love that they were seeking volunteers for it. Yeah. That's wild.

[A]

I mean, I. I would also volunteer.

[B]

I know you would. I know you would. You're like, three sandwiches. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So they were setting martinis up through a police. Via a police system, which I adore. And, of course, this stunt contributed to his local notoriety. When he came down from the publicity roost, he got into a convertible with a bunch of models, and they all, like. Like, put their arms over him as they drove away. Like, he's like a showman. He's vaudeville ready, as they say.

[A]

I feel like he's doing a lot of what. Like. Like what major collabs would do these days to try to promote something. But he's doing all of them back.

[B]

To back when no one's like, it's what they want. It's like, what a collab. Like, what these brands would want to pull off. But, like, he's just, like, doing it on a whim, on his own.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Like, incredible.

[B]

Marketers could never. Nowadays. He also developed a strong affinity for archery. And as part of this whole archery situation, he said it was because he had a bad back and it was, like, good exercise for his back. But he became skilled very quickly. He practiced intensely and at night a lot of the time. And he ended up competing in tournaments, gained statewide attention, and even won the Nebraska State Indoor Archery Championship.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

I know. So this win generated press coverage focused on the novelty of a man with one eye being, like, an expert archer. Right. You know what?

[A]

No. That is incredible.

[B]

It is incredible.

[A]

He has no depth perception. That's incredible.

[B]

Right? I know. And so they. They got really into it, and the Yeoman Archery Company said, we want to sponsor you. And so now he's, like, a sponsored archery expert and is, like, going on tours and all this stuff.

[A]

Stuff. It has now switched from Catch me if you can to Forrest Gump.

[B]

Okay. All right.

[A]

He, like, becomes, like, the ping pong master all of a sudden, you know?

[B]

Yeah. So we're on to something here. With. With my own affinity with. To the story. I'm. I'm. I'm seeing the pattern.

[A]

He's just, like, fulfilling every pop culture movie from the 90s, it seems.

[B]

What's next?

[A]

Does he sink in a ship called the Titanic? I don't know.

[B]

He already sank on a ship.

[A]

Oh, my God, he did.

[B]

OMG.

[A]

Gee, I feel like all the movies from the 90s were just written about different chapters of his life at this point.

[B]

And he had a makeover like every other 90s movie. I don't know. I feel like there's a million. Yeah. Pretty Woman.

[A]

He took his glasses off while walking down the steps, and everyone realized he was beautiful just in time for prom.

[B]

Thank God he's hot now.

[A]

Finally.

[B]

That eye patch really did. People were really into it. He got a lot of late ladies.

[A]

You know what?

[B]

Good for him. Listen, I'd be into a guy with an eyepatch for sure.

[A]

With this amount of lore, I'd be interested in him for real.

[B]

Like, you want to be him? I. I know it. I feel it. I just. I can't get over it. And. And as part of this whole archery deal, he would, of course, do trick shots, like popping balloons, shooting behind his back, doing, like, timed shots, and, like, vamping with the crowd as he did archery. Like, he's just a showman. He even signed autographs for people in this, like, elaborate way where he just wrote Fritz or Fritz Johnson. And he gave, like, really lively speeches at the archery events and occasionally entertained audiences by eating an entire chicken bones and all.

[A]

You got to go back to your roots.

[B]

You can't. Not if that's a skill you have. You have to use it.

[A]

In the words of Hannah Montana, you'll always find your way back home, as.

[B]

Lindsay Lohan once said. So, of course, as I already alluded, he. He became somewhat of a local radio station personality at KBO N Radio, and he would deliver sports segments, local event updates. He was described as having a warm, animated, animated voice. His. His voice was very recognizable, and they knew him as, like, the guy with the eye patch. He'd often rib his friends who were getting married and, like, said things like, oh, that's a big mistake. You know, marriage is for. Or losers, whatever. He would make commentary about, like, people getting married. But then he met a woman named Nancy, and in 1959, they were married and had a child together. And he kind of ate his words and was like, you're right. But I hadn't met Nancy yet, you know? Neighbors remembered him as an affectionate, helpful, and very involved father and husband, and no one really questioned him because they didn't have reason to. In early 1960, Fritz traveled to Chicago for a major sports expo As a representative of yeoman archery. He performed demonstrations in a bright jacket and bow tie, interacting with crowds and exhibitors. But one man had come up from Akron, Ohio, and stop short when he saw what basically looked like the ghost of his former acquaintance, Larry baker, Fighter, who, for all intents and purposes, had died in a tragic boating accident three years earlier, Never had a mustache and surely didn't wear an eye patch.

[A]

You know, the fun had to end somewhere. And if you're playing with fire, that obviously.

[B]

And you are playing with fire, really, I mean, push.

[A]

You gotta. Again, you got to keep a low profile. If you're going second identity, like, you.

[B]

Can'T push in the envelope.

[A]

Something was gonna happen. People were gonna talk. You're too fucking weird, people.

[B]

You're gonna talk weird. And the newspapers don't have anything better to talk about, you know, 100%. He called Larry's niece because the guy was like, okay, I'm sure this is Larry, but I feel like I need his family to, like, confirm. So his niece drives up from Akron and is like, that's my uncle. Yeah. And she. Multiple reports say she approached him and said, some variation of, excuse me, sir, aren't you my uncle Larry? Which is a wild thing to say. And he said. And he said, oh, no, I think you have me mistaken with someone. Someone else. And she's like, nope, I'm pretty confident you're Larry. So she calls some male relatives and asks Fritz to get on the phone. And he's like, I mean, sure, I'll talk to them. I guess just to kind of put this aside. He gets on the phone, and his brother and cousin are like, larry, like, we would recognize your voice anywhere. And they contacted the police. Fritz agreed to get fingerprints taken because he really was like, like, what are you guys talking about?

[A]

I think I know where we're going now.

[B]

I think you do too. He got his fingerprints taken. He agreed to it. He went in and he got them compared with this other fellow, Larry Bader's fingerprints. Because they were both in the navy. Fritz basically intimated that this was all being misunderstanding. But when they checked the fingerprints, of course they were a match. And it was officially declared that Fritz Johnson and Larry Bader were the same man. Man. And when he found out, he reportedly said something like, well, that answers that.

[A]

Well, I've done weirder things.

[B]

Yeah. He was like, huh? Yes. And it's weird because, like, it wasn't that he denied it at this point. He was like, well, if the fingerprints say it, I guess that's my identity. Like, he didn't deny it. You know what I mean?

[A]

Well, so what I was thinking. Or is there. Is there? Do you know what I was thinking?

[B]

Yes, but please go ahead, because I'd like you to bring it up, if you don't mind.

[A]

Okay. So my guess is that he did fall off that ship and on his way down, hit his head.

[B]

And so that is a major theory.

[A]

Okay. Because he does seem to not know what's going on here.

[B]

And remember the eye.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The brain tumor.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Okay, so there are a couple theories here, right? Like, did he take advantage of that and pretend like he didn't remember? Was it, like, because he knew he had the tumor, he could blame, you know?

[A]

And also, if he knew he had the tumor, maybe he thought he was leaving his family before something terminal happened. Like, maybe he thought, like, right, maybe I'm saving them by them not having to see me suffer. And then it.

[B]

Right. I don't know.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Some theories are that he went to die by suicide on this boat trip, and then, you know, it went awry. He was injured. He didn't know. He went into a fugue state. He didn't know. You know, and these things weirdly do happen, these, like, dissociative fugues where you. You literally don't remember your own biographical history and your brain, as a coping mechanism, like, invents a story. And on that note, I should mention that his former boss was Fritz something or other.

[A]

Oh. So maybe he just kind of remembered the name.

[B]

And they think maybe he just pulled that from somewhere in his mind and was like, oh, yeah, that's me, Fritz, and just went with it. And he had some of it, right, like the Navy and all that. But then he genuinely appeared baffled by this whole situation, which was kind of bizarre. So he insisted he had no memory of his Ohio life, but he took this fingerprint test really seriously and was like, well, I guess if that's what it says. He also denied knowing his wife, Mary Lou, or any of his children. He met with them, and he even enjoyed their company. Like, they spent a couple days together in Chicago ago, but Mary Lou basically claimed, like, he doesn't know who we are. She's like, he does not have any history of a relationship with us, which must be so scary.

[A]

So messed up. Yeah. And especially, like, confusing for the kids when, like, your dad isn't excited to see you.

[B]

And, like, I will say the youngest, the old. Sorry, the oldest was six when he disappeared. Okay. So he would remember probably some, but, you know, really little. So most of them didn't even remember him very well.

[A]

Well, okay. Almost a blessing. It's like, at least you're not totally heartbroken. I don't know.

[B]

Yeah. It must be a, like, a sick feeling, though, to be like, did my dad, like, leave on purpose? You know, and.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And Mary Lou had already kind of grieved and moved on, and she was actually engaged to a new man. But now that they found her husband, she was a good Catholic and said, well, I can't. I not getting divorced, so we're still married.

[A]

This feels like this whole episode has just been a big ad for that new Elizabeth Olsen movie. Have you seen about it?

[B]

No. I'm so out of touch.

[A]

Oh, so she dies and she was married twice. But I guess when in this movie, when you go to the afterworld, you get to pick, like, the partner that you want to stay, that you want to spend eternity with. Like, almost like an actual, like, marriage, like, committing forever. And so. So the. Her first husband who died early versus the guy that she ended up marrying.

[B]

And is it like a drama or comedy?

[A]

I'm sorry, I think it's a, like a rom com.

[B]

How fun. But.

[A]

And one of them is Miles Teller. I forget who the other one is.

[B]

I'm getting more and more excited.

[A]

But no, she's. She has to. The whole movie is her, basically, her two husbands from different periods in her life having to compete with each other of, like, who. Who is she going to want to spend eternity with? Because she only gets to pick one.

[B]

Okay, well, that would suck for, like, most of America, most of everybody, because I feel like everyone gets divorced and remarried.

[A]

Well, anyway, no, this feels a little like that, where she's like, well, what do I do? I've got my husband came back from.

[B]

The dead and engaged.

[A]

And.

[B]

Well, it gets worse because not only did she have to now. Well, she didn't have to, but she. She chose to not press charges and stay in the marriage because she didn't want to go against her belief system, but also the government said, hey, we want all that money back. Back. Not the government. Well, the government did, but also the insurance, the life Insurance company said, we want our money back. Also the government said we want all those payments back. We sent monthly, which was like 200 some bucks a month, which today is like 2 grand.

[A]

You know, part of her, part of her was thinking, like, why couldn't you have just stayed hidden?

[B]

Oh, she actually did say. She said she wished at the. She initially said she wished she had never been discovered. Like she wished he could have just lived his life out where he was and not, not ruined. Not ruined, but like really just upset everybody's life because all of a sudden.

[A]

The other new husband is like, God damn it.

[B]

I know. He's like, I was so close.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But so remember, he was already. He was remarried to Nancy and had a child with her, and now suddenly that marriage is no longer legal.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And she's kind of like freaked out, obviously, and is like, what is going on? And. And she's all worried about his ex and his kids and she's like, like, well, not his ex, his. His wife. It's all so confusing. Even the boat rental folks reached out and said, you owe us money for that damaged boat. Which made me laugh.

[A]

So heartless.

[B]

Can't catch a break. Yeah. So it really shattered her life. And a lot of people's upset, a lot of people's stability. Now, as for the aftermath of all this, like I said, his marriage to Nancy was invalidated. Mary Lou did not press charges, which she could have pressed charges for bigamy or abandonment, but she did not. He lost his sponsorship from Yeoman Archery. He withdrew from public life. He moved out into a separate place from Nancy. He had very limited contact with both families, even though he was still married to Mary Lou. But he picked up a job and lived at the YMCA and would just send the monthly payments. Both Nancy, poor guy. I know Nancy and Mary Lou. National newspapers covered the story extensively. Like, what a spectacle, right? Just a total spectacle. Come back from the dead with a mustache and an eye patch. Like, what in the world? Of course, his attorney argued that his tumor was what caused this kind of dissociative. They called it something different. They called it like a modern day schizophrenia, but in reality it was like dissociative identity disorder and, or, or a tumor impacting his memory and creating like this identity crisis. So the newspapers were all over it. And as part of one of the articles that covered it, he was quoted as saying he was still baffled and confused. He had no clue about his past in Ohio and maybe God would end up having to sort this out. Well, famous last words, because he Died within a year. Wow. Yeah. The cancer from his eye had spread to his liver, and he died at only 39 years old.

[A]

But what a life he lived.

[B]

I know what lives he lived.

[A]

He fit a lot in 39 years. Oh, my God, he sure did.

[B]

He sure did. Lots of kids, lots of names, lots of stories, stunts, you know, and he maintained until his death that he had no memory of his life as Larry. They actually held two services, one for Larry and one for Fritz. And the Fritz Memorial was in Omaha, and obviously the other one was in Akron. Just really incredible stuff. He never acknowledged recovering any memory. And if it. If it were a dissociative fugue state, those can actually last months, even years. And so, you know, maybe if he had had five extra years, years, it would have come back to him, because typically with those situations, within a few months or years, when you're faced with your original family or memories, they come back. Like, they tend to resurface. But he claimed he had zero memory of any of it until his dying day. But again, it was only a year later. Maybe it would have come back to him eventually. He's either a really good actor or.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You know, which is possible. Or he. He really had forgotten somehow. But his case does continue to be cited in lots of discussions, whether it's amnesia, dissociative fugue, mistaken identity, double lives, whether it's crime story or a psychological psychology story. He underwent evaluation at the Mayo Clinic, and doctors have confirmed he did have a tumor removed behind his left eye. He did have radiation treatments, optic nerve damage. They stated amnesia was medically possible. However, they emphasize there's, of course, no way to determine whether his amnesia was genuine or fabricated. And it's. And so the findings are inconclusive, and nobody knows that's the end.

[A]

Honestly, though, I see why this is one of your favorites. And also, please bring back more true crime that we can just banter, because that was like, I know.

[B]

Isn't it wild and, like, fun crime?

[A]

I don't even know if. Yeah, I don't even know where the crime was, but I guess it's a mystery. Mystery.

[B]

Yeah, it's a mystery. Exactly. And like, somebody commented recently, like, that I never do serial killers anymore, and I guess I never really thought about it. It's not intentional. I think I just covered all the really big ones early. Like, not early, but, like, you know, I did Ed Geen, Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy. Like, I've done all those, and I feel like they're so pop culture now that I feel like I just tend to gravitate toward the lesser known ones, but I do I almost a serial killer today and then I was like, no, I want to do this. So. To that person. Sorry.

[A]

Well, also, I, like I said with my, my cases, like, sometimes there's ones that like, are just. There's a lot of meat to them, so it just takes a long time to do. Like, I. There's some. I'm still waiting for you to cover, but I do know that they're huge cases and so I'm like, I don't.

[B]

What are they? Just as a refresher for my memory.

[A]

Well, some of them are also like, I don't know what your. If you have updated boundaries. But like, like there's like the Albert Fish one who like.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Children or some like that. Like, I don't know like where you stand on those. So I, I just. If they don't show up, just don't show up. You know, I mean, I never know what you're going to cover before we get here, so it's always a mystery to me. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Albert Fish, good point. Yeah. There. I guess. I know I'm like, I've covered all the serial killers. It's like.

[A]

No, well, you've covered all the ones that like, don't necessarily have children as the victims. And I know that was one of our.

[B]

Yeah, fair enough. Well, it's covered all the ones that are like, ne. Like current Netflix specials.

[A]

Sure. No, when we first started though, it was like, you know, anything that had to do with like kids as the main victims were like, we didn't want to touch.

[B]

Yeah, I've definitely kind of. Of given up on that because I feel like there are so many cases that cross that boundary and I've kind of.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think when I. Especially when I was pregnant, I got really like, in my head about it and I think I've kind of relaxed on that. But I do make sure to announce it early so people who are still.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Understandably not into it at all can peace out. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

No, this was such a nice moment.

[B]

It felt like a lighter, easy, breezy, you know.

[A]

You know, throw these in every now and then because that was fun.

[B]

Yeah. Is that weird? Well, so my, my hear my thoughts. Like either. So here are the theories. Either he had some sort of brain tumor or something that impacted his memory. But then why. It was just a weird timing, right, with this boat accident and then like the storm and then he disappeared with a suitcase of cash. Like, it just Lines up very, you know, perfectly. And then also, obviously, like, you mentioned the theory of maybe he sustained a head injury on the boat or in the boat accident and went overboard, something like that. I mean, I really liked your point of, like, maybe the briefcase was at risk or whatever, and he, like, went after it. Who knows? But there was also such a bad storm that the Coast Guard was like, he would not have survived this, like, if he were out on the water. I don't know.

[A]

His story is already so wild that maybe another wild point is that he did survive the storm.

[B]

Exactly. You know, it's like, that's what I thought, because I'm like, well, surely it wouldn't be this. And I'm like, like. But surely this man wouldn't exist at all. And yet here he is, living on top of a telephone pole with a martini. I don't know.

[A]

I think another reason why you like the story so much is because he does remind me of all the. The good chaos that you bring to a table.

[B]

Oh. Oh, thank you. That's so nice. I do feel it's.

[A]

You would survive a storm like that.

[B]

I would, like, accidentally go fishing in the world's worst storm and then, like, end up in Omaha.

[A]

You would do a lot of, like, well, let's see. We're probably fines. And then, like. And then again the coast gu.

[B]

I'm like, don't worry, Coast Guard. I'm okay.

[A]

You know, like, it's even just.

[B]

I don't want to bother you.

[A]

Don't worry about rescue example. But you with that hammering your curtains into the walls, like, the way.

[B]

Now imagine my exposed brick trying to hammer into that. It's really not pretty.

[A]

Like, you would just find a way to just make it work every time.

[B]

Just, like, surf the Lake Erie wave during a hurricane. Hammer with my hammer and my briefcase of cash. Hi, I'm Fritz. I mean, it's just, like, out of control. But then. But then you think, well, he's under financial strain of, like, 20 some grand, right? And he has a fourth child on the way. Like, these are stressors. Yeah. And he. He'd always been into, like, the get rich quick and, like, skip the labor and the waiting and the. You know, so maybe he was like, it. I'll start new, you know, maybe. And, like, maybe he just knew that he could always point to the brain tumor and say. Say, well, I have no memory of this, and maybe he really was just good at pretending. Who knows?

[A]

I mean, that's a great point. Like, I. I could see him knowing that he can swindle people.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And if he wanted to get away and he felt freaked out or like. Or he felt maybe suffocated in some way, like. Or he felt just terrified of, like, what time he had left because he was sick, I could see him as being, like, one last hooray off.

[B]

Yeah, they're.

[A]

They're gonna lose me anyway, so I'll just beat them to the punch, and I'm just gonna go do something wild.

[B]

Right. I mean, he was dead within five years of that boat accident. And, you know, it makes me wonder, too, when. When his personality shifted so dramatically. Like, people who had known him before said, like, that he did not behave this way when I knew him. Like, he didn't. He did the chicken thing, but, like, he was really chill and reserved, and now he's, like, wearing bow ties and, like, on the radio and. And, you know, of course, like you said, aren't you supposed to be under the radar? But then my counterpoint to that is depending on this guy's actual personality. Like, some people cannot help but put themselves in the spotlight. Like, we see these people who are, like, either sociopaths or whatever they are, but they're just like, I can't resist the spotlight. So I'm not saying that's him. I'm just saying I think it's possible that somebody would just, like, say it. I want to be. I'm. I want to ride high while I can and be this. And maybe he was like. Maybe if it were a brain situation or just like, a fugue state of stress or whatever, maybe it was like, oh, he'd always wanted to be this larger than life character, and maybe he knew someone. Maybe his boss, Fritz, maybe. Maybe somebody, like, resonated.

[A]

He had, like, a head injury, and it just made him act impulsively or.

[B]

It changed his behavior. Exactly, because they say that. I mean, that happens, too, when people have head injuries. Right?

[A]

I mean, he literally was just getting up and just making speeches that he. Nobody expected him to be prepared. I mean, he might have just been, like, kind of just reacting to things and not knowing.

[B]

I think he maybe have. Had just picked. Yeah. Had, like, changed his personality in a way. And maybe it was just parts of him came out that weren't there before, and the chicken stayed though. The chicken never. I mean, and that. You know, there's nothing worse about the story than that.

[A]

For me, he was like, chicken with bones, please.

[B]

Imagine, like, when they were doing the pulley system, and they're like, can we get you a sandwich? He's like, actually, I'll just. Just take an entire Kirkland brand roast chicken extra card and don't worry about.

[A]

Coming back to retrieve the skeleton.

[B]

Imagine having to. Oh, there won't be any remnants of it. I. Sick, dude.

[A]

I know we're not. I don't mean to keep harping on that, but, like, that you started there and it just only got more insane.

[B]

I know. It's just like, what in the world? And so, yeah, anyway, it's just a baffling story because every time I convince myself of one theory, theory, I'm like, but what about this? You know? And so it's like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't think anyone knows. And the fact that his own wife was like, he doesn't know who I am. Like, I believe her.

[A]

You know, I put this on par with one of my other favorite stories that you've recently covered, which was the. The guy who shot himself in the crotch or the. The guy. The guy who got shot in the crotch and nobody knew how he died.

[B]

Through the hotel room.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, my God. That's. That was one of the wildest stories ever.

[A]

I really like these wild mysteries that just make no sense because it feels.

[B]

Like if you saw this in a movie or that in a movie, you'd be like, there's no way that would ever happen.

[A]

Yeah. As a TV producer, if someone was pitching it to me, I'd be like, that's not realistic.

[B]

That's ridiculous. Yeah. It feels like Stranger than Fiction, which is, incidentally, one of my top three favorite movies of all time. So I'm starting to really pick up the pattern here, which is.

[A]

Could have also been based off of.

[B]

Could have also. Very well.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's just really. And it's sad, too, just because, like, his. His. It really disrupted so many people's lives, like Nancy and Mary and the kids. But, like, it's just like, on purpose or not on purpose? Like, was he just, like, going fishing like you said, because he just felt like it, or.

[A]

Yeah, it sounds truly. With him, fortunately and unfortunately, anything is possible.

[B]

Yeah, I know. Exactly. That's so true. True. It's like, weirder things have clearly happened to this guy, so I can't even think of.

[A]

Every time I think of a weird thing, I'm like, no, that's not the weirdest.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And that's just what you've reported. I'm sure there's other things where, like, there are still, like, a local legend.

[B]

For something adding things. And I Was like, another one, another one. And there are more. Oh, I know what I was gonna say. The last thing as I was going through the notes this time. It didn't occur to me until. Until today. Until I was going through the story with you. But the. The fact that he didn't write dates and he never counted his money. I'm like, what time? It was maybe a. A brain. An issue with numbers.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, if he's not counting his money and he's not writing the date and people are like, that's fine. Like, maybe it was really something he couldn't.

[A]

Numbers. You're totally right. Wow, That's a good point.

[B]

And he's also tipping 200%.

[A]

Yeah, he can't. He's. He's got something.

[B]

I think there's something up with the numbers, too.

[A]

I think he wasn't faking it.

[B]

I don't know that he was faking either. I feel like there was. There was an element of, like. And it's very rare, but again, like, this guy's clearly one of a one in a million, so he really.

[A]

I mean, yeah, the. The chances are low, but not zero, you know?

[B]

Right, Exactly. To write, like, autumn of the year is what he would write.

[A]

Yeah, I think he just. I think. I think it was.

[B]

And the bank actually had instructions to call him on the first of every new season because they were like, he. We need to tell him when the new season begins.

[A]

You know what?

[B]

I really think there was, like, a number.

[A]

If he had a head injury, then I love how accessible they were to help.

[B]

That was my other thought, because I'm like, why would they accept this? And I'm like. But maybe it was like, he literally couldn't do it. And they were like, okay, that's fine. You know, like, maybe that's why.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

That's literally just completely my conjecture. Just to point out that that occurred to me today, so I don't want to claim that as fact, but.

[A]

No, I. I think he had a head injury.

[B]

That's what it feels like, doesn't it? Because. And you know what? Maybe he did go out there to die by suicide. Maybe he really was, like, stressed and whatever and. And was like, I'm. I'm leaving. I don't know. Maybe he was too cocky and thought he could go fishing and skip the storm.

[A]

I think he was e. I think he went out there to maybe hurt himself or. Or I think he was.

[B]

Why would he, like, take the money?

[A]

Or. I think he was a daredevil, and I think it fell into the water, and he went to go find it and hit his head on the boat or something. I don't know.

[B]

Something.

[A]

It's one of those two where I. Either way, the. The head. Head. And I don't know. I don't know anymore.

[B]

But then it's like. Oh, and he had a tumor, too, and it's like. Well.

[A]

And did he know about the tumor before?

[B]

I don't know. I'm not sure. That was the other thing that would make me think.

[A]

Then this was a. An attempt.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If he didn't know about the tumor, I think he's a Just kind of. He made stupid decisions, and I think you're right. He didn't want to leave the money in the car, so he went on the boat. And I think he. It was an accidental hit on his. His head?

[B]

Yeah, something like that. Right.

[A]

It's. It's only one of those two branches in my head. I can't imagine another scenario.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. There's. On a. Stormy. On a stormy tide like that. Like, you're gonna. If you're rocking around on that boat, you can hit your head on anything. You could fall in and you hit your head on the side of the boat. You could.

[B]

Yeah. But then what was the intention of even getting on the boat? Like, was it, like, just to have a good time, or was it, like, to escape or.

[A]

No. Maybe he was trying to. I have no idea. I have no idea. Clue. I hate that. We'll never know.

[B]

And then he ends up in Omaha, Nebraska, of all things.

[A]

Yeah. Not what I saw coming.

[B]

Yeah. So just really baffling all around.

[A]

Great story.

[B]

Next week, I'll be back with something really upsetting and horrendous, so enjoy it while it lasts.

[A]

You know what? These palette cleansers are lovely, though.

[B]

Yeah. It was refreshing to have a nonviolent crime for once.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, I hope everyone is making safe treks towards their Thanksgiving destinations.

[B]

Are you going to Seattle or. Sorry, Am I supposed to say that? Okay.

[A]

Yeah, I go every year. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Okay, good. Are you taking hankies, or is he saying he's just getting boarded? Oh, he's getting boarded. Okay.

[A]

Because Thanksgiving is nowhere near as long as Christmas is.

[B]

Right. Is he coming to Christmas, though, right, to beat the fam or. Not really.

[A]

Tentatively. I don't. I don't totally know what the plan is yet. It seems like our whole holiday schedule is getting kind of thrown around in different directions, so I really don't know what's happening with Christmas yet, But Thanksgiving.

[B]

Is a I mean, I don't either with my own Christmas, and I have a child, so don't worry. Well, we might figure it out.

[A]

We might have Christmas. We might have a short Christmas. We might be postponing Christmas for, like, a month and doing, like, a late Christmas. Like, it's, it's all up in the air right now, so.

[B]

Well, you got to get your hoverboards, so.

[A]

I know. I, I, I told him. I said, make, get me three.

[B]

Get me three and get one for Hank.

[A]

But no, for right now, it. Hank is not coming to Thanksgiving. There's just little kids and other dogs, and my, My aunt is, has some chronic illnesses and that are.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Not suitable for a dog who likes to jump on people.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So anyway, it's, he is not welcome, and that's fine by me.

[B]

Well, I'll be across the coast in Connecticut, so I'll wave to you for afar.

[A]

Well, Connecticut Thanksgiving sounds very, it's really nice. Very nice. Also very pilgrimy.

[B]

Yeah, sorry, that part's. Yeah, that part's not great, but beautiful.

[A]

It seems beautiful.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, there's, there's a lot of nice stuff over there. In the fall, it's, it's really pretty.

[A]

So I'm very jealous. You're actually going to see, like, changing leaves and stuff.

[B]

Oh, I've had that for two months. Don't worry, it's already snowed for several days.

[A]

Send me a red leaf sometime. I'm over.

[B]

Leona collects them, so she'll send you you an entire envelope or Ziploc bag. Don't worry.

[A]

I tell her I want a tree amount of leaves.

[B]

Okay, good. We have at least three times that downstairs.

[A]

So Hank would like the trunk part a.

[B]

Hey, does he want a piece of mango slice from a. Not mango slice, mango tree slice from a. Encased in resin from a certain friend called Gina. No, no.

[A]

But you know what I got really jazzed about? It's a late birthday present. Very late birthday present. Present for me. But I've been telling Allison since we got here. She is desperate to have a tree in the yard. I don't.

[B]

Oh, yeah, I remember that.

[A]

But she offered me a healthy compromise. And I get to pick the tree. And the tree that I picked.

[B]

Lemon.

[A]

It. No, it's called a fruit punch tree. And they.

[B]

Oh, you would.

[A]

It's a bunch of stone fruit all on the same tree. It's like, what, plums and nectarines and on the same tree.

[B]

Tree. I've never heard of such a thing.

[A]

Fruit punch tree.

[B]

Wow, that's crazy.

[A]

I've never heard of peaches, nectarines, apricots, cherries, and plums.

[B]

Holy. You're gonna make so much jam.

[A]

I literally. Other than apricots, every single one of those is one of my favorite fruits. Apricots.

[B]

What? Really? I don't like apricot jam. That's it in German. Oh, everyone would make it marmalade.

[A]

I can't stand apricot. It. The skunks can have that one.

[B]

I like it plain, but not in marmalade.

[A]

That's fair.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

I won't send you any, so thanks. You're welcome.

[B]

You're gonna send me a whole box of just apricots things.

[A]

Just.

[B]

Is it apricot or apricot?

[A]

I say apricots, but anyway, me and my fruit punch tree wave happy holidays to you.

[B]

Thank you. I will wave back and hopefully snag a few on my way, so. And that's why we drink.

[A]

And Doug. Here we have the Limu emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual.

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Fascinating.

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[B]

Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us.

[A]

Cut the camera.

[B]

They see us.

[A]

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