Podcast Summary: "Distrust in Love, Advice Session"
Anything Goes with Emma Chamberlain
Release Date: June 8, 2025

In this insightful episode of Anything Goes with Emma Chamberlain, titled "Distrust in Love, Advice Session," Emma delves deep into the complexities of trust issues, jealousy, and distrust within romantic relationships. Recorded from her cozy bed and other intimate settings, Emma offers unfiltered, relatable advice to listeners grappling with various relationship dilemmas. This episode tackles three primary listener questions, each unraveling the intricate emotions and decisions involved in maintaining healthy romantic connections.

1. Navigating Open Relationships and Jealousy

Listener's Question:
"The guy I'm in love with wants an open relationship, but I don't know if I'll be too jealous. What do I do?"

Emma's Response:
Emma begins by empathizing with the listener's hesitation, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness in such situations. She shares her personal stance against open relationships, highlighting the psychological turmoil it would cause her. Emma asserts,

"[04:15] Emma Chamberlain: 'I know that for me personally, romance, intimacy, connection at that level is far too fragile...'"

She acknowledges that while open relationships work for some, they are not universally suitable. Emma advises the listener to introspect whether they can handle the emotional discomfort that might arise from an open arrangement. She underscores the significance of honest communication and the necessity of aligning relationship structures with personal comfort levels.

Notable Insights:

• Self-Awareness: Understanding one's own boundaries and comfort zones is crucial before entering into non-traditional relationship structures.
• Communication: Open and honest discussions with partners can lead to mutually satisfying arrangements or clarify incompatibilities.

2. Dealing with Threesome Requests and Self-Worth

Listener's Question:
"My boyfriend wants a threesome and I'm uncomfortable with the thought. Is this normal in long-term relationships? Am I not enough for him?"

Emma's Response:
Emma reassures the listener that feeling uncomfortable about a threesome is entirely valid. She dispels the notion that such desires reflect inadequacy, emphasizing that sexual preferences vary among individuals.

"[15:30] Emma Chamberlain: 'You are enough as a person, okay? I won't have any of this. Him wanting to have a threesome has nothing to do with the value that you bring...'"

Emma explores potential reasons behind the boyfriend's request, such as seeking novelty or feeling understimulated, and stresses that the listener's feelings should take precedence. She advocates for setting clear boundaries and having candid conversations to determine the best path forward, whether that involves compromising or reconsidering the relationship's dynamics.

Notable Insights:

• Self-Worth: Personal value is independent of a partner's sexual requests or desires.
• Boundaries: It's essential to assert one's comfort levels and not succumb to pressure for activities that feel wrong.

3. Addressing a Partner's Distant Behavior

Listener's Question:
"My boyfriend has gone out three weekends in a row until 5 am with zero communication. It makes me feel so sad. What do I do?"

Emma's Response:
Emma validates the listener's feelings of neglect and underscores that such behavior can be a red flag in a relationship. She shares her personal threshold, stating that consistent late-night outings without communication would be a deal-breaker for her.

"[27:01] Emma Chamberlain: 'If my boyfriend started going out until 5 am every weekend with no communication, I would break up with him immediately.'"

However, she advises against making hasty decisions without understanding the underlying reasons. Emma recommends initiating a heartfelt conversation to uncover potential explanations, such as issues with friends or personal struggles. She emphasizes the importance of open dialogue and transparency, allowing both partners to express their feelings and work towards a resolution or, if necessary, part ways amicably.

Notable Insights:

• Communication: Addressing concerns directly can clarify misunderstandings and reveal deeper issues.
• Self-Respect: Recognizing and acting upon one's needs is vital for personal well-being in relationships.

4. Handling Relationship Anxiety and Fear of Abandonment

Listener's Question:
"I've been dealing with a lot of relationship anxiety and I'm worried that he will leave my life."

Emma's Response:
Emma shares her experiences with relationship anxiety, distinguishing between past trust issues and the current situation where a partner's avoidant behavior induces anxiety. She explains that such feelings might stem from the partner's inability to be fully present or committed, rather than solely from the listener's insecurities.

"[33:45] Emma Chamberlain: 'You can’t trust your gut in relationships. We convince ourselves that it's something else because we don't want trauma...'"

She encourages listeners to identify the root causes of their anxiety—whether internal factors like past trauma or external factors like a partner's behavior. Emma advises seeking clarity through introspection and conversations with the partner to address and potentially resolve the underlying issues.

Notable Insights:

• Root Cause Analysis: Understanding whether anxiety stems from personal insecurities or the partner's actions is crucial for effective resolution.
• Emotional Safety: Ensuring that both partners feel secure and committed is foundational for a healthy relationship.

5. Managing Intimate Thoughts About Others in a Happy Relationship

Listener's Question:
"I'm dating someone and I'm really happy with him. He's an amazing guy who treats me great and I see a future with him. I don't want to mess it up, but I find myself having dreams of another male friend of mine, and it makes me feel guilty."

Emma's Response:
Emma normalizes the occurrence of having romantic or intimate thoughts about others, even in committed relationships. She emphasizes that such thoughts do not diminish one's feelings or commitment to their partner.

"[45:20] Emma Chamberlain: 'You are not a bad person for having those dreams. It's a slight rough patch in what will hopefully be a long and healthy relationship...'"

She advises against obsessing over these thoughts, suggesting that allowing them to pass without judgment can reduce their frequency. Emma also mentions the value of open communication with the partner if both parties are comfortable, fostering an environment of trust and understanding.

Notable Insights:

• Human Nature: Acknowledging that occasional attractions are natural helps in reducing unnecessary guilt.
• Mindfulness: Letting thoughts come and go without overanalyzing can alleviate unnecessary stress.

Conclusion

In this episode, Emma Chamberlain offers compassionate and practical advice to listeners dealing with trust issues and jealousy in their relationships. She emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, honest communication, and setting personal boundaries. By sharing her own perspectives and encouraging introspection, Emma empowers her audience to navigate the often tumultuous waters of romantic relationships with confidence and clarity.

Notable Quotes:

1. "[04:15] Emma Chamberlain: 'I know that for me personally, romance, intimacy, connection at that level is far too fragile...'"
2. "[15:30] Emma Chamberlain: 'You are enough as a person, okay? I won't have any of this...'"
3. "[27:01] Emma Chamberlain: 'If my boyfriend started going out until 5 am every weekend with no communication, I would break up with him immediately.'"
4. "[33:45] Emma Chamberlain: 'You can’t trust your gut in relationships. We convince ourselves that it's something else because we don't want trauma...'"
5. "[45:20] Emma Chamberlain: 'You are not a bad person for having those dreams. It's a slight rough patch in what will hopefully be a long and healthy relationship...'"

Connect with Emma Chamberlain:

• Social Media: Follow Anything Goes on Instagram, YouTube, and Spotify for more episodes.
• Chamberlain Coffee: Explore her coffee company for a taste of her favorite brews.

This summary encapsulates the key discussions and insights from Emma's advice session on distrust in love, providing listeners with a comprehensive overview of handling complex relationship emotions.