Podcast Summary

Are You A Charlotte?

Episode Title: Catching Up with Friends with Dan Futterman aka the Sexy Pastry Chef
Release Date: September 4, 2025
Host: Kristin Davis
Guest: Danny Futterman

Overview

This episode of "Are You a Charlotte?" features a heartfelt and candid reunion between host Kristin Davis (Charlotte York from Sex and the City) and actor/writer Danny Futterman, who played Stefan, Charlotte’s “metrosexual” one-episode boyfriend in Season 2, Episode 11 (“Evolution”). The conversation moves between nostalgic behind-the-scenes details from Sex and the City, musings on acting and creative careers, explorations of change in TV and culture, and personal stories about love, friendship, and professional crossroads. Both actors reflect on the challenges and joys of aging on- and off-screen, as well as the bittersweet end of the reboot series And Just Like That.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Reuniting and Revisiting "Evolution" (03:02 – 13:45)

• Nostalgia and the Passage of Time:

  • Kristin and Danny remark on how little they seem to have aged and share the strange sensation of rewatching their Sex and the City episode over 25 years later.
    • “To me, you look the same because I literally just watched the episode. Right. Which is so crazy.” (Kristin Davis, 04:11)
  • They discuss the emotional disconnect between feeling unchanged internally and seeing themselves so young on screen.

• Audition Anecdotes and Broadway Connections:

  • Danny recalls auditioning for the role of Stefan, cementing how rare it was to get cast in New York back then, and how the Sex and the City set drew from the city’s rich stage talent.
    • “I was getting some offers for stuff, not a lot, but I was like, I’m gonna go out to Queens to audition for like a one episode thing. Seriously.” (Danny Futterman, 06:08)
  • Both reminisce about casting dynamics, with Cynthia Nixon advocating to bring Broadway actors onto the show.

• The "Metrosexual" Label in the '90s:

  • Kristin and Danny discuss the (now outdated) term and how Stefan represented Charlotte’s first "positive" sex scene.
  • Kristin shares how unusual it was for Charlotte to get a sex scene that felt genuine, enjoyable, and beautiful, especially compared to prior comedic or uncomfortable ones.

Behind-the-Scenes Stories: Acting, Identity, and Intimacy (13:45 – 20:43)

• Blurring Personal and Professional Lines:

  • Danny opens up about how his roles (often gay characters on stage and TV) led to real-life questions from his now-wife about his sexuality, reflecting broader questions about identity and performance.
    • “Early in my relationship... she said, ‘If you are gay, just tell me now, because we're like, falling in love.’” (Danny Futterman, 11:29)
  • Kristin and Danny discuss the shifting cultural norms around gay roles, straight actors, and casting in TV and theater.

• Deep Dive: Broadway Casts and Actor Crushes:

  • They recall the legendary cast of Angels in America, Danny’s admiration for Cheri Jones and Cynthia Nixon, and the camaraderie and occasional crushes exchanged backstage.

• Being Comfortable On Set:

  • The sex scene is remembered as a standout for its visual care and the comfort created by director Pam Thomas. Kristin praises Danny as a sensitive and respectful scene partner.
    • “I had so many fears and then ended up really enjoying it because you, of course, are a respectful and lovely co-star.” (Kristin Davis, 36:19)

Endings, Reboots & Legacy (23:48 – 39:00)

• Aging in the Spotlight and “And Just Like That”:

  • Kristin opens up about the complexities of returning to the franchise after so many years, the challenge of fan expectations, and the emotional impact of the series’ most recent ending.
    • “It’s a documentary of middle age... I feel so seen.” (Kristin Davis, 24:52)
  • She shares the resonance of a New York Times podcast (“Cannonball”) that reframed the new series as a powerful, true depiction of middle age and friendship.

• Impact on Viewers and Generational Legacy:

  • Both note the profound effect Sex and the City had on viewers, especially women who saw themselves represented for the first time.
  • Danny reflects on how Sex and the City and The Birdcage have aged—admitting he expected The Birdcage might not hold up but is surprised by its continued popularity.

Friendship, Romance & Real-Life Crossovers (28:09 – 39:00)

• Real-Life Love Stories:

  • Danny shares how he met his wife Anya while guest-starring on Homicide: Life on the Street, with Kristin playfully referencing how she lent him her house during that heady time.
    • “Walking out and being told, that's the writer. And thinking, that's the person I should be engaged to.” (Danny Futterman, 29:36)
  • Touching on the complications of dating and the demanding schedule of Sex and the City, Kristin reveals her own relationship timelines and the challenges of balancing work and romance.

• Cultural Impact & Recognition:

  • Both discuss being recognized for their roles decades later and share stories of how Sex and the City remains relevant for new generations—Danny’s daughters insisted he should do the podcast.
    • “They are fans of the show. Oh, this has, you know, it really amazing in a way that you would think it, you know, these things would not.” (Danny Futterman, 50:04)

Industry Realities, Writing, and Moving On (44:41 – End)

• Career Evolutions:

  • Danny talks about his shift away from acting into writing, showrunning, and producing; Kristin reflects on the possible “typecasting” effect of Sex and the City, and the opportunities they did—or didn’t—get as a result.
    • “It’s kind of like your energy in the business is kind of sucked up by this, you know what I mean?” (Kristin Davis, 61:10)
  • They both highlight how luck, chemistry, and great writing underpin a long-running show's success.

• Show Production and Creative Collaborations:

  • Insights into the changes in TV production: from the logistical differences between long and short seasons to the shifting makeup of cast and crew after many years.
    • Kristin describes her surprise and bittersweet feelings at returning for the reboot and finding herself surrounded by a new, younger crew.

• Processing the End and Finding Gratitude:

  • Kristin shares her process of mourning the end of And Just Like That and balancing the sadness of loss with ongoing friendships and gratitude for what the show brought.
    • “It was like suddenly walking into your own funeral when you didn’t know it was coming. I mean, it was like we died.” (Kristin Davis, 59:14)
  • Both recognize the privilege and rarity of such a career, and Danny offers encouragement and hope for new opportunities ahead.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “To me, you look the same because I literally just watched the episode. Right. Which is so crazy.”
  — Kristin Davis (04:11)

• “It was a semi humiliating audition where they're basically like, get up on a chair and be scared…that was what I did.”
  — Danny Futterman (08:38)

• “In this is literally Charlotte's first kind of positive type sex scene.”
  — Kristin Davis (09:46)

• “Early in my relationship…she said ‘If you are gay, just tell me now, because we're like, falling in love.’”
  — Danny Futterman (11:29)

• “I had such vivid memories of some of it and then some of it, like, I didn’t remember.”
  — Kristin Davis (36:19)

• “It’s a documentary of middle age…I feel so seen.”
  — Kristin Davis (24:52, quoting a podcast that moved her profoundly)

• “Let me tell you, it was like suddenly walking into your own funeral when you didn’t know it was coming.”
  — Kristin Davis (59:14)

• “I hoped so because God knows we have a very big profile. Let’s, let’s put that to use for something else, you know what I mean? Because no one can stop talking about us, which is interesting. Very interesting.”
  — Kristin Davis (61:33)

• “You're like—you're mourning it a little bit right now while you're celebrating, for sure.”
  — Danny Futterman (58:59)

Important Timestamps

• 03:02: Beginning of content; Kristin welcomes Danny and sets up the episode
• 04:27: Reflections on youth and memory from rewatching the episode
• 06:08: Danny describing his audition for Stefan
• 09:46: Kristin recounts Charlotte’s first positive sex scene
• 11:29: Danny’s personal story about perceptions of sexuality from roles
• 19:35: On comfort, trust, and working together as scene partners
• 24:52: Kristin discusses the podcast that reframed And Just Like That as a documentary of middle age
• 29:36: Danny remembers meeting his wife, Anya, and knowing she was “the one”
• 36:19: Kristin recalls anxieties and ultimate comfort during their infamous sex scene
• 43:14: Kristin highlights the memorable on-screen kiss between Charlotte and Stefan
• 50:04: Danny’s daughters encouraging him to be on the podcast
• 59:14: Kristin analogizes the end of the show to attending her own funeral

Tone & Atmosphere

• Warm, deeply personal, and nostalgic—laced with humor, candor, and mutual respect.
• Reflective—both speakers are honest about aging, change, and the end of a beloved project.
• Playful and affectionate—discussing old crushes, funny set stories, and real-life entanglements.
• Melancholy but optimistic—acknowledges sadness but looks forward to new possibilities.

Closing Thoughts

This episode offers a rare, intimate window into the real relationships and creative processes behind a TV classic while confronting big questions about identity, change, aging, and creative fulfillment. For fans and newcomers alike, it’s a reminder that Sex and the City’s legacy is as much about friendship, vulnerability, and adaptation as it is about shoes and sex—onscreen and off.