Head Over Feet with Mary Beth Barone... (S3 E4 "Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl...)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Head Over Feet with Mary Beth Barone"

Are You a Charlotte? – S3E4, “Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl...”
Host: Kristin Davis
Guest: Mary Beth Barone
Release Date: November 12, 2025

---

Main Theme

This episode of "Are You a Charlotte?" revisits the iconic Sex and the City episode “Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl...,” which delves into themes of gender performance, bisexuality, and sexual fluidity. Host Kristin Davis (Charlotte York) and guest comedian-writer Mary Beth Barone reflect on how these topics landed in the late ‘90s, their stunning timeliness in 2025, and how character experiences parallel their own life perspectives and contemporary dating culture.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Behind the Scenes of "Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl..."

[03:42-04:44]

• Written by Jenny Bix, who “really helped Charlotte get developed” and whose Upper East Side sensibility informed the character.
• Mary Beth points out the irony of Bix being considered “not edgy in any way” yet penning such a boundary-pushing episode.
  • “Literally, this episode... when you watch it in 2025, is stunningly correct.” – Mary Beth (04:34)
• Kristin praises the writer’s ability to explore sides of themselves through characters, sharing that many Sex and the City stories let writers experiment beyond their own lives.

---

2. Staying Power of the NYC Setting

[05:04-05:45]

• Both hosts celebrate how SATC’s characters remain New Yorkers through all life stages, resisting stereotypes of women “growing out” of city life.
• Kristin: “I just love that they really do, like, grow up in New York and they are committed, and they're like, icons. Mainstays." (05:17)

---

3. Depiction of Bisexuality and the Then-vs-Now Lens

[05:45-08:57]

• Recap: Carrie dates a younger, openly bisexual man (Eddie Cahill), which throws her for a loop.
• At the time, the subject shocked even the cast; now, the hosts agree, “this conversation is so mainstream.”
  • “Now this conversation is so mainstream.” – Mary Beth (06:13)
• Kristin speculates about bisexual dating patterns—how bi men tend to date more men, while bi women may expect to wind up with men due to socialized relationship norms.
• Polyamory enters the pop culture mainstream now, but was unnamed and barely understood when the episode aired.
  • “We don’t even use the word polyamory because I don’t think we knew it at that time.” – Mary Beth (08:24)

---

4. Charlotte’s Sexual Exploration

[11:22-13:36]

• They reflect on the “Charlotte as prude” stereotype, noting that she explores and enjoys sex more than the audience often remembers.
  • “Charlotte is definitely doing stuff way more than you really realize.” – Mary Beth (11:44)
• Kristin highlights Charlotte’s attraction to artists and creatives, viewing her “art connections” as a means for growth and bold sexual exploration.
• The mustache-and-suit photoshoot is discussed as a playful form of gender performance; drag king art has become commonplace in 2025 but was still boundary-pushing then.

---

5. Carrie’s Journey with Bisexual Dating

[16:52-18:56]

• Carrie’s unease when dating a bisexual man is unpacked; Kristin argues it still rings true for many people in 2025.
• They contrast how bisexuality is depicted through Carrie's experiences vs. when Samantha dates a woman artist—each brings out different relationship dynamics (emotional intensity, expectations).
• The insecurity some women feel dating bi men stems from societal myths (“Are you looking at everyone?”), but both note, “it’s about the person.” (18:03)
• Kristin: “You have to be true to yourself and you can’t just do things because you feel the pressure.” (17:27)

---

6. Dating Culture: Then vs. Now

[19:06-23:44]

• Spin the bottle and party hookup culture are compared between New York and LA, with Mary Beth bemoaning the “sexless” LA scene and the rise of dating through Instagram vs. in-person connections.
• The hosts reminisce about old-school flirting pre-Tinder, how nightlife felt charged with possibility, and how apps have changed the romance dynamic, perhaps reducing spontaneity.

---

7. The Coffee Shop/Brunch Scenes

[47:34-49:33]

• The group discusses the iconic group conversations and how rewatching the diner scenes reveals the nuance in character interaction.
  • “It's just girls chatting and... They feel safe because they know each other so well. They can say things that piss each other off... They are so real with each other.” – Kristin (49:11)
• Kristin loves the vulnerability and honesty in these moments and likens them to her own friendships.

---

8. Miranda and Steve: Modern Relationship Archetypes

[32:51-36:08]

• Kristin and Mary Beth praise the portrayal of Steve as a “securely attached male” and a loving partner who “fights for” Miranda, an avoidant partner—emphasizing the rare depiction of such dynamics even today.
• Kristin: “I love how much he loves Miranda.” (33:03)
• Mary Beth finds this portrayal both “rare” and “rewarding,” highlighting how viewer perspectives shift over time as their own romantic experiences evolve.

---

9. Samantha’s Assistant: Power and Desire

[37:16-41:16]

• Samantha’s storyline with her macho assistant is (re)discovered: It becomes a power play about who's “on top”—literally and figuratively.
• Kristin: “If a woman wants to be in charge, quote unquote, then they’re bossy. But if a man... he’s just like being the man in the relationship.” (39:00)
• Both relate to the ongoing cultural struggle for women to balance confidence, leadership, and desire in partnerships.

---

10. Personal Parallels and Modern Dating Perspectives

[36:16-37:16, 56:15-58:21]

• Mary Beth and Kristin candidly share their own approaches to dating, career, and identity.
  • Kristin (as Charlotte): “Every time I get really badly hurt, I think, I can’t do that again. I just need to protect myself more. But I also think there’s a healthy approach of, like, I do just want to put my heart on the line.” (56:30)
• They celebrate the idea of keeping “Charlotte hope” alive—valuing openness, optimism, and authentic connection even after disappointment.
• Mary Beth: “I totally approve of that. I just don’t want you to think like, that you failed...You have a lot to give, and you have a big career, and you need to put your energy there.” (36:17)

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Timeliness of the Episode:
  • “This episode...when you watch it in 2025, is stunningly correct.” – Mary Beth (04:34)
• On Cultural Perceptions of Bisexuality:
  • “I think you would be surprised at how many people, how many women, would still have hang ups about dating a bisexual guy.” – Kristin (06:58)
• On Exploring Gender Presentation:
  • “Charlotte is definitely doing stuff way more than you really realize.” – Mary Beth (11:44)
• On Honesty in Female Friendships:
  • “It’s just girls chatting and...They feel safe because they know each other so well. They can say things that piss each other off, things that they wouldn’t say in front of other people.” – Kristin (49:11)
• On Keeping Hope in Dating:
  • “Every time I get really badly hurt, I think, I can’t do that again. I just need to protect myself more. But I also think there’s a healthy approach of, like, I do just want to put my heart on the line.” – Kristin (56:30)
• On Power Dynamics in Relationships:
  • “If a woman wants to be in charge...then their bossy. But if a man wants to be in charge, then he’s just...being the man in the relationship.” – Kristin (39:00)

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [03:42] – Opening reflections on episode authorship and Jenny Bix’s contributions
• [05:04] – The show’s embrace of New York as a lifelong home for women
• [05:45] – Recap of episode plot; bisexual dating discussion begins
• [08:24] – Polyamory, then and now
• [11:22] – Charlotte’s gender-play photoshoot and sexual openness
• [16:52] – Reactions to Carrie’s struggle over dating a bisexual man
• [19:06] – Dating scene comparisons: LA vs NY, technology’s impact on romance
• [32:51] – Miranda and Steve’s relationship explored through attachment theory
• [37:16] – Samantha’s storyline: ethics, sex, and power dynamics
• [47:34] – Coffee shop scenes and their legacy
• [56:15] – Modern “Charlotte” hope and resilience in dating

---

Tone & Style

• Honest, warm, reflective, and humorous—Kristin and Mary Beth’s conversation mixes nostalgic behind-the-scenes tidbits with thoughtful, often witty contemporary analysis.
• The hosts invite listeners to both reminisce about Sex and the City’s heyday and examine how its questioning spirit resonates today.

---

For Listeners New to the Episode

This conversation will resonate whether you’re a SATC devotee or a newcomer. The hosts deftly connect the show’s legacy to ongoing conversations about womanhood, sexuality, and city life. Iconic scenes and storylines are relived with candor and humor, and the current dating landscape is explored through the lens of the show and the hosts’ own rich experiences. If you ever re-examined a beloved pop culture artifact through grown-up eyes, or asked “Are You a Charlotte?” of yourself—you’ll find insights, laughs, and a fresh sense of hope here.

Transcript

[Kristen Davis]

This is an iHeart podcast AG's holiday.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

2025 collection is here this season, AG explores the intersection of cinematic legacy and sartorial craftsmanship, drawing inspiration from the crews and directors behind the iconic spaghetti westerns of the 1960s. Set against the backdrop of Alabama Hills, a legendary location in film history, the collection channels a sense of sun, bleached grit, timeless style and quiet confidence. This collection is a tribute to the makers behind the lens, the costume designers, cinematographers and directors whose understated off screen style helped shape on screen Legacy. The Holiday 2025 collection is available now at aggeans.com use code KRISTIN15 to take 15% off your next order. Even if you've shopped AG before, before.

All the algorithm fed blah and the endless sea of dupes, shopping used to feel more fun. But here's a confession Dirty Rush listeners. You can find that fun feeling again on ebay. It's not mindless scrolling, it's a fashion pursuit. You all know I love a good find. I actually scored a vintage Saint Laurent blazer and a pair of Gucci heels that still had the dust bag. There is always more to discover. Ebay has millions of pre loved finds from hundreds of brands backed by ebay's authentic authenticity Guarantee. Ebay Things People love Tired of spills.

And stains on your sofa? Wash away your worries with Anabe. Annabe is the only machine washable sofa inside and out where designer quality meets budget friendly prices. That's right, sofas start at just $699. Enjoy a no risk experience with pet friendly stain resistant and changeable slipcovers made with performance fabric Experience Cloud like comfort with high resilience foam that's hypoallergenic and never needs fluffing. The sturdy steel frame ensures longevity and the modular pieces can be rearranged anytime. Shop washablesofas.com for early Black Friday savings up to 60% off site wide backed by a 30 day satisfaction guarantee. If you're not absolutely in love, send it back for a full refund. No return shipping or restocking fees. Every penny back. Upgrade [e-mail] Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. As winter approaches, make sure you set aside some time for self care now through December 2nd. Get great savings on personal care essentials when you shop in store or online. Buy two participating self care items and save $3. Shop for items like TRESemme Shampoo, Dove Shampoo, Dove Men's Care Body Wash, Dove Body Wash and Shower gel. And save $3 when you buy two or more items. Offer ends December 2nd. Restrictions apply. Offers may vary. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line, but.

[Mary Beth]

First, there, the last one.

[Kristen Davis]

Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Hi, I'm Kristen Davis, and I want to know, are you a Charlotte?

[Mary Beth]

Okay. This episode is called Boy Girl, Boy Girl, and it is written by Jenny Bix. Jenny Bix, to me, is she grew up on the Upper east side. Like, she really helped Charlotte get developed. She came on. Was it halfway through the second? Second. I think she came on as a consult first. Like a consultant couldn't think of. Was it first? Okay. She came on a little bit, and she said it was just Michael, Darren, and her. And sometimes she would have to draw drawings on the whiteboard of how Female Anatomy worked.

[Kristen Davis]

I'm glad she was there.

[Mary Beth]

I know. I'm really glad she was there, too. Excuse me. I'm really glad she was there, too. And then Cindy came, and then we had two. And then they eventually rose to be executive producers, which was great.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

But it's funny to me that she wrote this because think of her as just really, like, middle of the road, not edgy in any way. Sorry, Jenny, but no offense.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Right.

[Mary Beth]

But it's interesting because literally, this episode, when you watch it in 2025, is stunningly correct.

[Kristen Davis]

100. It is very. It is the time. One of the timeless episodes, I would say.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Right.

[Kristen Davis]

There are. And there are many. But I just think also, what's so amazing about being a writer is that you get to explore sides of yourself that you don't show people ever, except on the page. So I'm sure this was such a fun way to, like, stretch those, you know, parts of herself.

[Mary Beth]

Definitely. Yes.

[Kristen Davis]

And so I rewatched it before I got here when I was in New York last week. And I also. I also want to say that I love that those three characters that are in and just like, that they stay in New York, because I think there's this idea that as you grow older, you have to leave and go do the suburban thing. But I'm, like, New Yorker for life. I've been there for 13 years. So I just love that they really do, like, grow up in New York and they are committed, and they're like, icons. Mainstays.

[Mary Beth]

Yes.

[Kristen Davis]

So this episode where Charlotte is showing an exhibit by a photographer who dresses women in male drag is Happening at the same time as Carrie is. She is. It is revealed that she's dating a bisexual. A younger bisexual.

[Mary Beth]

Yes. Who's adorable. Adorable Eddie Cahill.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

Who apparently has quit the business. We found out we were investigating.

[Kristen Davis]

He wanted more for his life.

[Mary Beth]

Adorable. I'm sure that's true. I don't know his whole story, but he is adorable. And I remember at the time just feeling like I didn't even understand. I was like, that kid's so young, you know, Even for us at the time. And we were very young, but we didn't feel that young. We felt like. Like old Hollywood people. You know what I mean? Because in. In back then, you were supposed to be done at 40, right? That was what they always told us. You know, all of us were told by our agents, and everybody be done at 40. So you gotta work now. Which, thank God, is not true anymore. Thank the heavens. That's a good thing. That's changed. Yeah, but it's not like it's easy, but it's pretty much changed. But in terms of the whole episode, basically there are lines where she says things like. I mean, first of all, Carrie is very freaked out that this guy tells her, like, I had a relationship with guy and then a relationship with the girl. And she's like, what? And then we have this who coffee shop scene where she calls herself an old fuddy duddy, you know? And yes, she is. And now we really are. Right. Like. Like, now this conversation is so mainstream.

[Kristen Davis]

It is. And I think you would be surprised at how many people. How many women would still have hang ups about dating a bisexual guy. And I think a lot of things go into that. And I think the main idea, which is something that I also talked about in my special, which is that, like, I do think. And I don't have numbers on this. I'm just hypothesizing that most bisexual people end up with men, whether they're bisexual men or bisexual women. Because for women. Well, I don't. I don't know the. I don't know the psychology, but I know as a bisexual woman, I have always just sort of assumed that I will end up with a man because I've been dating men for 20 years. At this point, I feel like I know the expectations, I know the rules of engagement. I'm totally open to being with a woman.

[Mary Beth]

Right.

[Kristen Davis]

And I have been with women. But I think the expectation is just that I'm not so used to that dynamic that I will probably end up with a guy.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Interesting.

[Kristen Davis]

And then it does seem like with the bi guys that I know, they do lean more gay, they do date more men.

[Mary Beth]

Right.

[Kristen Davis]

So I think that there are still a lot of things that as a woman dating a bisexual man, you would really have to, like, interrogate. I'm sure there's people that have no problem with it and would just dive in headfirst. I think the party scene is so interesting to me because that idea of staying friends with your ex, the different dynamics with, like, lesbian relationships, I love that.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

Polyamory, I mean, that has just explored. Exploded into the mainstream as well. Where back then, I can't even imagine how that must have just felt, like, totally foreign to most of the people watching it, 100%.

[Mary Beth]

And we don't even use the word polyamory because I don't think we knew it at that time. Right. And I think for us, like, I remember at the time thinking, well, this is an odd episode. You know, it just seemed like, oh, well, this is odd. You know, like kind of over there. And now it's just so everywhere. Incredible. Incredibly. Right on that. I love it. I love it so much. And I love that she. She keeps, like. I mean, obviously Charlotte is like, no, of course he's going to be gay, you know, which, of course she would say that. Right. That makes perfect sense. And I do know also what you're saying. And I talked also to Benny because of overcompensating about when I was in college, you know, they would take bets on the freshman boys who was going to be gay and who was going to.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh, my God, that's fascinating.

[Mary Beth]

Actors. It was all actors, of course. You know, and then I had this boyfriend who was a sophomore who had made it through the freshman year and was still calling himself straight. And later.

[Kristen Davis]

No, not so much.

[Mary Beth]

Not so much. So I really relate when I watch overcompensating because he was a great guy. Bob. His name's Bob. And you such a sweetie and such a great friend. So for me, it was kind of awesome, except there's just some strangeness in the. In the sex department. Of course, there's some mysteries. Right? Some mysteries, some unanswered questions. Why is this not working? Yeah, it's very interesting, but I was so young. I didn't know. You know, I thought it was. Thought it was me or, you know.

[Kristen Davis]

Well, we always think it's us, of course. No matter what.

[Mary Beth]

Definitely, definitely. But I also love, like, the fact that this kid, first of all, just seeing Sarah Jessica is very, like, pours herself into this, like, more so than I remember or that I really realized because usually I felt like she kind of kept that for, for big. For the big relationship.

[Kristen Davis]

Well, it seemed like this had to be one episode. So let's, let's get through the storyline and leave it apartment Give it her all.

[Mary Beth]

I felt like she really gave it her all. Like especially like roll around and kiss and she's always very protective of her body and whatnot. And he's very sweet. Like it was so interesting. It was super interesting.

[Kristen Davis]

And as someone that now I'm. I never thought I'd be single again because both of my last relationships were, you know, talking about getting married.

[Mary Beth]

Oh my God.

[Kristen Davis]

I was like, I didn't think I'd be in this phase again. But now actually dating. I, I also think what's interesting too is that he is so comfortable just declaring that he dated. He doesn't. He's not like nice. He doesn't hesitate. But I think dating, I have d. You know, you meet people. I've met a couple of younger guys and it does just feel like, oh my God, sometimes I feel like I'm 25 again in a 30 with the 34 year old's like sensibility and being self actualized and that stuff. So it's interesting to watch Carrie sort of try to like fit in those spaces.

[Mary Beth]

It is interesting.

[Kristen Davis]

And she puts the outfit on. You know, she's got the boots, I got the outfit, she's got the dress.

[Mary Beth]

God, that outfit.

[Kristen Davis]

Fabulous. Sometimes it's fun to do that.

[Mary Beth]

I think it's fantastic. I mean when I was watching it, I was like, good for Carrie because she's not sure, but she loves his kissing. And she's trying it and she's trying it and she puts on those gold boots and that leather jacket or whatever it is. It's like, it's an interesting, it's an interesting One for Ms. Terry. It's very different. I know, but I like it.

[Kristen Davis]

And speaking of different Charlotte then.

[Mary Beth]

I know, I know. And I do vaguely remember this. And this is one of the things that I think of because this I think was the time. There was a lot of time in the beginning where they would say like, I played the prude. Which if you actually look.

[Kristen Davis]

No, not she's getting railed. Okay.

[Mary Beth]

I mean it's not.

[Kristen Davis]

Let's not say that Charlotte's doing stuff.

[Mary Beth]

Charlotte is definitely doing stuff way more than you really realize. And this in particular one of the things that I love about it. Because also, do you remember the Hasidic Jewish character In the second season, I want to say I go to Williamsburg, your place of residence, and to visit him. He's. He's a client.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

And I go to visit him, and we. We get it on there in the artist studio in Williamsburg. And, you know, her art connections are a way for her to expand herself. And then there's a guy who paints the Georgia o' Keeffe esque paintings, and I go to Connecticut to see him and his artist.

[Kristen Davis]

And I think her, like. I think her engaging sexually with the artist makes so much sense to me because I'm like, well, duh. That's, like, so attractive. Yes, these are creatives, but that are putting their art out for people to consume. It's like, what is more attractive than that?

[Mary Beth]

Nothing.

[Kristen Davis]

And I think for Charlotte in this episode, it's so fun to watch her, the discomfort, but then she really feels in her power. And I find that even with my sense of style, I really do go back and forth between being hyper femme. And then some days I want to feel more masculine. And one Halloween, actually, Benny and I dressed as Courtney Kardashian and Travis Barker, and I was Travis. And I had a bald cap on and a bunch of fake tattoos.

[Mary Beth]

I love it.

[Kristen Davis]

And I didn't have to touch my hair for the night. I was wearing a suit. It was. No, it just was like, I was comfortable. Yeah. And I feel like there is so much opportunity now for women especially to really, like, oh, yeah. Be on the spectrum of how their personal style.

[Mary Beth]

There's so much freedom.

[Kristen Davis]

And it was so fun to watch Charlotte with mustache just being like, I need a bigger sock.

[Mary Beth]

It was good. I know. It was good. It was good. It was also weird. And as I said, I almost wore the suit. And then I was like, I didn't have time to get here in the morning and find a tie. But it's. I mean, Drew Barrymore wears this every day now. Like, there's. Thank God, much more freedom, but for, obviously for Charlotte. What I also loved, and I hadn't remembered, is when we're at the art show at the beginning, that I'm all, like, unnerved by him, you know, which is cute. And I remember there's a great picture of us. I didn't remember it was this episode, but all of Willie's there with us. And I've got the hoop earrings on, which is very rare. I've got the super long ponytail, which was all Pat's doing. And it works. It works. And I think I might even have a red lip. It Was all very outside of my normal. But then you see that he's like. I'm all like, can't even talk. And I talk about canapes. You know, in my nervous way, I had forgotten all that. And it's so. So sweet and cute, but also, like, that, I think, is Charlotte's desire to, like, expand and go other places. And Carrie's like, you ask him out. You remember this?

[Kristen Davis]

Yep.

[Mary Beth]

It's so cute and sweet, and I love it so much. But then when I. That was when Adam Scott was just on, we talked about Judy Chin, who was our makeup artist, who had done the movie Frida.

[Kristen Davis]

Okay.

[Mary Beth]

And learned to do the eyebrows so beautifully. And she did my mustache. And she also does severance. And she put a beard on Adam.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh, my God. Flashbacks. Wow. So she's working.

[Mary Beth]

She's amazing. She's amazing. She won an Oscar. Okay.

[Kristen Davis]

She's one of the greats.

[Mary Beth]

Top, top, top level. And the most lovely person. And I remember really having fun with, like, how are we gonna make my hair? You know, I remember a lot of talk about the physicality of it. And I remember Donovan and I trying to figure out, like, we didn't want it to be cheesy, but we wanted it to be, because, I mean, also, like, now I was just in London for a wedding, and I took my daughter, and we went to one of the art galleries. I'm not gonna remember which one, the modern one. And I mean, they had all these drag queen, drag king pictures. And my daughter was like, whoa. You know, she's 14. But it was. It was awesome. But it's very, very mainstream now. But it was happening here, and I think it's amazing that we put it in. But I do love. I do love Charlotte, and I think it's, like, kind of under. Underappreciated how. How brave she was.

[Kristen Davis]

Absolutely. And I think when you. Yeah, again, it's like. I think sometimes when you think of the characters, you forget how many. Because so many episodes, how many different situations they are put into. And sometimes they totally act within their. You know, and then sometimes they just totally surprise you. And I think that's the joy. That's what's so fun about the show.

[Mary Beth]

It's the joy, for sure.

[Kristen Davis]

And I don't see Charlotte as a prude. I think she really wants to. What I take from Charlotte is she wants her sexual encounters to mean something. And I don't think that's negative. I just think it's one approach to your, you know, the sexual side of. Of life. And I think when you see her in a situation like this, it's like she is doing something totally new, right? Something that she probably never expected she would do. But I also love that the artist saw her, the capability that she could do it.

[Mary Beth]

Right? Because at first I'm. Charlotte's like, no, no, I can't. What? What? Like me. You know what I mean? And he's like, yes, so sweet. It's so cute and sweet. I love it. But let's talk about the bisexuality thing, because it is interesting. Like, when you watch Carrie's whole struggle with it, what did you think? Did you think, like, yes, she's so outdated? Or no, you think, no, I totally understand.

[Kristen Davis]

I think it. I think it is many people's experience, even to this day. And I think what's great about the show, too, is that you explore bisexuality in a different way when Samantha dates the artist. And that's such a different type of relationship that I also really related to, like, the intensity of being with a woman and how different it is. And you're always talking about your feelings, and it's so fiery, and it's just, like, completely different than dating a man. But what I find, yeah, I think that Carrie's struggle and journey through this episode, and at the end of it, she just decides it's not for her, right? And that's okay because, like, so it is like, you know, you have to.

[Mary Beth]

Be true to yourself.

[Kristen Davis]

You have to be.

[Mary Beth]

And you can't just do things because you feel the pressure.

[Kristen Davis]

And that question of, like, if you saw a man and you were attracted to him, like, would I. I think there's this thing people assume about bisexual people, that they're attracted to everyone, right? It's like, no, I'm attracted to. To hot people on either side, but it's not like anyone's a threat.

[Mary Beth]

I do think that's what she was tripping out and that.

[Kristen Davis]

And that makes sense at that time, I think. And people probably still have that question, right? But I feel like it is. Maybe there's a little more understanding of that nowadays.

[Mary Beth]

I think there's more understanding that it is the person. Like, at one point, he says, no, Carrie, it's not about.

[Kristen Davis]

Right.

[Mary Beth]

The man or woman is the person. That's what's so 2025.

[Kristen Davis]

I know, right?

[Mary Beth]

Like, kind of amazingly so. But I also think that there is the question of, okay, so if you were with a man and then you're with a woman and you wanted to be with me, would I be able to Fulfill all that you need. That's the question. Yeah, but she doesn't ever say that. Exactly. But I think that's what she's feeling when she's feeling insecure. Like, are you looking at that guy? Right, right. Because who wants to feel any more insecure than you already do?

[Kristen Davis]

Of course. And I think you in relationships, it's like whether it is a man or a woman that you think your partner's looking at, it's like you don't want them to be looking at other people anyway in general. So I think that's also about just like having good communication and being able to express insecurities without being feeling judged. And so yeah, in this case for Carrie, it was, it was a non starter. But I think she, she tried, she tried.

[Mary Beth]

But let me ask you this. When she goes to the party and they play this in the bottle, which I also was like, how. Okay, interesting.

[Kristen Davis]

She was like, people are still there. Wait, what? People just want to kiss each other. It's like they'll do anything in a party. Are you kidding? I'm not kidding. Maybe not here in L. A because everyone's so worried about like how they look, but in New York, people are definitely horny. I find LA to be completely sexless. By the way. I've said this before, no one's trying to smash anymore, but I think in New York, in New York they are.

[Mary Beth]

And in LA they're not.

[Kristen Davis]

I do find that this is fascinating because I think in New York when you go to a party, it's obviously, I'm totally generalizing and I love generalizing. It's like part of my job as a stand up comedian. In New York, when you go to a party, even if it's an industry party, there's going to be people there that are in different industries, like different walks of life, creative pursuits, things like that. Unlike here, sometimes when it's like a Hollywood party or something, it's like all these people who are so worried who's looking at them, who else is here, they're not really engaging with you because they're just like looking at you there.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

So it's, it's harder to connect and like flirt and be like doing the thing of like, I want to have sex with you.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Okay.

[Mary Beth]

I don't, I don't. This is not my experience.

[Kristen Davis]

Okay. I need to go to the parties you're going to.

[Mary Beth]

I don't know currently, not currently, but.

[Kristen Davis]

I do notice I try to pick up on like sort of the vibes and it just all feels very. Like there's walls up, which I understand people are. People are trying to protect themselves, and fame is so stressful and scary. And so I understand there's, like, a lot that goes into it mentally, but I just find that. I think New York people are more DTF downtown.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, okay. Thank you so much.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

So let me say this. I haven't been out a lot because. Because, you know, I've got the kids, whatever. I'm in a different time, but. And I'm trying to remember. I mean, I go out more in New York because when we're there, sometimes the kids are here. Um, and I went out with Sarita one time. We went to this after party after a awards thing. Cause we'd been at work, and then we got off work, so we just went to the late part. And mostly we were just with each other, which was really fun. But there. There were some guys flirting with us in a way where I was like, what's happening? Like, I was scared. Do you know what I mean?

[Kristen Davis]

That's so fun, though. Was that in LA or New York? New York.

[Mary Beth]

New York. In New York.

[Kristen Davis]

Also, I do want to say I think it's changed with, like, cell phones and camera phones and all that stuff.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, my God.

[Kristen Davis]

Because people don't want to get, like, snapped, of course. I'm sure. I think back in the day, like, the Brat Pack and everything, people were definitely. You know, that's way better. Drugs and stuff.

[Mary Beth]

Yes.

[Kristen Davis]

But I do think there's just been a shift with the LA vibe of, like, just maybe being perceived a little bit too much to feel comfortable, like, flirting with someone that you just met.

[Mary Beth]

So interesting.

[Kristen Davis]

That's just my.

[Mary Beth]

Let me ask you this. Do people ask for your phone number?

[Kristen Davis]

No. They follow you on Instagram.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, and then do they.

[Kristen Davis]

Do they dm and then they dm?

[Mary Beth]

Okay, yeah. Well, that's. That's what they'll do.

[Kristen Davis]

But I think it takes a lot more guts to ask for someone's phone number in person than to DM them. So it's like.

[Mary Beth]

Good point.

[Kristen Davis]

If they're DMing me, they're probably DMing 10 other people. Because it's like, it's very low risk, low Stakes with DMing.

[Mary Beth]

But does that mean that you don't respond?

[Kristen Davis]

I do. That's the problem is I do respond okay.

[Mary Beth]

And then I think that's a problem.

[Kristen Davis]

But then my mind, I go, well, they're probably just DMing me, but I know in my. In my heart of hearts, they're DMing 10 other people, too, but who cares? It depends what you're looking for.

[Mary Beth]

Well, that's true. It depends what you're looking for. But also, like, maybe if you then converse with them in person, it might shift things.

[Kristen Davis]

That's the hope. That's that Charlotte. That Charlotte hope that I carry with me.

[Mary Beth]

Well, I'm glad you have the Charlotte hope, but I do think it is harder to. To make that step in.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

In real life.

[Kristen Davis]

Right, Totally.

[Mary Beth]

And. And I think it's only gotten harder because of the apps. Right. But I'm not against people dming. I'm not against that. I'll DM people back, but I have to know you.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

You know what I'm saying?

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

So maybe that would be. But back in the day when I was, you know, younger and we were at the height of the. The. You'd go out. Oh, my God. First of all, there was a lot of drugs. I wasn't doing them, but there were a lot of drugs. And second of all, I mean, depending where you were. Right. But. And the. The phones were there, but they weren't quite like how they are now.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

But also there were just. People were just flirty. My God.

[Kristen Davis]

I mean, I. That's what I want. When I first moved to New York, it was 20, 2012, and it felt like it was right before the apps just became, like, the only thing. People used to meet people, and there was just this sense of, like, every night you went out, you could fall in love.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

And maybe you don't. Maybe you meet someone and you kiss for five seconds on a dance floor and you never see them. You don't even learn their name. But there was this sense that, like, anything could happen. And I do think the romance, sex in the city just really, like, created that environment. I'm just like, you just don't know. For me.

[Mary Beth]

For me, we. That was how it was, and we put it on screen. We didn't create it. No. God.

[Kristen Davis]

I think for a lot of young women, watching the show felt like when you get to New York, that was.

[Mary Beth]

Your experience or your expectations.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

I'm sorry that it's not there, but it is more there than.

[Kristen Davis]

Maybe it'll come back.

[Mary Beth]

That's good. I think it should come back. And I also think that some of it is finding, like, your group or your people, because I feel like in la, I'm not totally sure because I don't go out a lot, but I do feel like it's still happening, but you have to find a place where it's Comfortable.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah, well, I just. I mainly hang out with gay guys, so that's also part of my problem if I want to hook up with people. But I have the best time.

[Mary Beth]

They're really fun.

[Kristen Davis]

They're the best.

[Mary Beth]

And they're going to protect you.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

Which is nice. All right, let's talk about the episode for a second. Okay. So the. My question that I want to ask you as someone who, who open to people. When Alanis and Carrie kiss, what were your thoughts?

[Kristen Davis]

Well, since it's been the bottle, I feel like it's pretty innocent. You know, it's not like it didn't feel like maybe this will change the trajectory of Carrie's life and she'll be open to dating women.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

No, definitely.

[Kristen Davis]

It sort of felt like, you know what it felt like to me? It was a woman who is open to being in the situation and she says, you know what? This is just not the stage of life that I'm in anymore. And that's so fine and so fair. It's like you. Sometimes I think dating younger can be so appealing because you feel like, well, maybe then my life, I'll just. It'll just feel like I'm young too.

[Mary Beth]

Absolutely.

[Kristen Davis]

But then there's elements where you just go, I'm actually past the spin the bottle phase.

[Mary Beth]

Most definitely.

[Kristen Davis]

And that's just not where I'm at. And I think to know oneself in that way.

[Mary Beth]

Right.

[Kristen Davis]

To walk away is. That's like what I think. That's what feeling. I don't. I don't wish I was in my twenties because I'm self actualized now or at least getting close. And I feel like that is a moment when the person would leave that you feel like that's. If I was in my 20s, I would have maybe tried to shoehorn myself into this situation and make it work. But in your 30s, you just go, I. I'll meet someone else.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, definitely, definitely, definitely. I mean, for me watching. And I remember thinking this at the time, and I don't know if it was just me projecting because it was Alanis. I was like, oh, I wanted that kiss to be better.

[Kristen Davis]

Well, and sometimes you do think as a viewer, like, was it the actors or was it just the mo. The take they used or the moment, or was it propelling story of just like how hard they go on the kiss?

[Mary Beth]

Right, right. For sure.

[Kristen Davis]

It's always a thought.

[Mary Beth]

Right.

[Kristen Davis]

And I know these are actors, these are real people that are going, I'm kissing Alanis Morrissette right now.

[Mary Beth]

Most definitely.

[Kristen Davis]

And Alanis Morrissead's going, I'm kissing Sarah Jessica Parker right now.

[Mary Beth]

Right. But I think Alanis was totally fine with that. And very down and very open, I feel like. Because we also know the ending, right? There's always going to be that frame that you're. You're. You're probably picking the take that you felt walked the line of her being open, but her not being that into it.

[Kristen Davis]

Right.

[Mary Beth]

But for me, as a viewer, I was like, give in more, babe. Enjoy that kiss more. That's how I felt watching it.

[Kristen Davis]

Maybe Carrie's the prude. That's. We're gonna change the narrative.

[Mary Beth]

I like that. I like that. I like that. But I don't think we should call anyone a prude, though, because I felt so bad when they would say that to me for so many years. Like, every interview I would do, they'd be like, so you play the prude? And I'd be like, so insane.

[Kristen Davis]

That's. That's just. That's reductive.

[Mary Beth]

It is. And unfair. And then, like, at one point, I almost wore this crazy Michael Kors dress to the Emmys because my representatives felt like people didn't perceive me as sexual. And I was like, okay, now I'm just. Just exhausted. Do you know what I mean? Like, what the hell do I have to do here? And then my.

[Kristen Davis]

You're in a show called Sex in the City.

[Mary Beth]

Exactly. But I was the prude in the show Sex in the City. Or at least that was the perception. But obviously it all worked out. But, like, at the time, I remember my. My. My guy, people wanted me to wear this. Like, I think Mariah Carey ended up wearing. It was like the PC dressy dress. I know. I almost wore that. I almost wore that. I was. I was scared to death, too. Michael wanted me to wear it. He's very sweet, but I was like, how do you keep it on? Or whatever. But then Mariah wore it, which. Amen to her. Right? But my. My female PR was like, you don't have to prove anything to anyone. You should look like a princess.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah. And that's nice.

[Mary Beth]

Interesting. It was interesting.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

I mean, but it's true. I didn't have to prove anything to anyone. But also, you want to feel good and powerful, right? So what does good and powerful mean? But then all these other people were.

[Kristen Davis]

Everyone has opinions.

[Mary Beth]

Yes. So many opinions. But I'm not. I'm not unhappy with anything that I wore. So it all worked.

[Kristen Davis]

That's good. That's. I mean, that's huge.

[Mary Beth]

That's huge.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

AG's holiday 2025 collection is here this season, AG explores the intersection of cinematic legacy and sartorial craftsmanship, drawing inspiration from the crews and directors behind the iconic spaghetti westerns of the 1960s.

[Mary Beth]

How exciting.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Set against the backdrop of Alabama Hills, a legendary location in film history, the collection channels a sense of sun, bleached grit, timeless style and quiet confidence. This collection is a tribute to the makers behind the lens, the costume designers, cinematographers and directors whose understated off screen style helped shape on screen legacy. Italian fabrications are at the forefront, paired with western inspired detailing and elevated utility pieces, shirt jackets, layered textures and modern silhouettes that make a statement without trying too hard. Denim remains the foundation, but it's reimagined with texture, depth and timeless wearability that define AG's DNA. The Holiday 2025 collection is available now at aggenes.com use code KRISTIN15 to take 15% off your next order, even if you've shopped AG before. Cool. I don't know about you guys, but I love to buy gifts. I love it so much. I love it so much more than getting gifts. But the one thing that I do.

[Mary Beth]

Love, especially when it comes to my.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Daughter, is getting matching things. I know it's such a cliche, but.

[Mary Beth]

I love it so much.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

So I have the perfect brand for Pandora Jewelry can make their holiday unforgettable with a gift that says it all from Pandora Jewelry. A gift that tells a story and shows you know theirs that doesn't just sparkle but speaks. From new festive charms to forever rings and personal engravings, this season give a gift that's perfectly theirs. Whether you're shopping for a shiny surprise for your significant other, matching bracelets to celebrate your friendship, or a heartfelt gift for a family member, say more this holiday season with Pandora. Shop [e-mail] or visit your closest Pandora store.

Before all the algorithm fed blah and the endless sea of dupes, shopping used to feel more. Well, fun. But here's a confession Dirty Rush listeners. You can find that fun feeling again on ebay. It's not mindless scrolling, it's a fashion pursuit. I love using filters for condition and price, saving searches and spotting verified listings. It makes shopping feel smart and exciting again. And when you score that rare Adidas Collab or that Dior saddlebag, even manifesting, it's a rush, ebay has millions of pre loved finds from hundreds of brands backed by ebay's authenticity guarantee. EBAY things People Love Time for a.

Sofa Upgrade Introducing Annabe Sofas where designer style meets budget friendly prices. Every Anibe sofa is modular allowing you to rearrange your space effortlessly. Perfect for both small and large spaces. Anabe is the only machine washable sofa inside and out. Say goodbye to stains and messes with liquid and stain resistant fabrics that make cleaning easy. Liquids simply slide right off. Designed for custom comfort, our high resilience foam lets you choose between a sink in feel or a supportive memory foam blend. Plus our pet friendly stain resistant fabrics ensure your sofa stays beautiful for years. Don't compromise quality for price. Visit washablesofas.com to upgrade your living space. Today sofas start at just $699 with no risk returns and a 30 day money back guarantee. Get early access to Black Friday now. The biggest sale is of the year can save you up to 60% off plus free shipping and free returns. Shop now at washablesofas.com offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Flu season is here and our pharmacies have you covered with a free flu shot with most insurance plans. Plus it's cough and cold season and now through December 2nd. Stock up on all the season's essentials and get ready for relief with discounts on items like Mucinex, Cold and Flu, Kickstarter, Mucinex, Fast Max Products, Vicks, Daquil and nyquil Combo Pack, Alka Seltzer plus also Airborne and afrin. Offers end December 2nd. Restrictions apply and offers may vary by location. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, Miranda. Let's talk about Miranda and Steve.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh my gosh. Mirandon Steve. I just, just, you know, I love Steve from the bottom of my heart. I really do.

[Mary Beth]

Me too.

[Kristen Davis]

And I love how much he loves Miranda.

[Mary Beth]

Yes.

[Kristen Davis]

And I love how much he fights for her. And I don't think we see that enough in real life or on tv. So true. It's just a man that is fighting for his woman because he sees her. I mean, and the relationship.

[Mary Beth]

Fighting for the relationship. This is rare. This is my advice to any men who might be listening. Nothing will turn your woman on more than you fighting for the relationship.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah. And that doesn't mean like, you know, show up at the house uninvited. No, that's tr. It doesn't mean be a stalker when.

[Mary Beth]

She opens the door and he's there.

[Kristen Davis]

But I'm like, God, that would just be so nice.

[Mary Beth]

I know. Well, he's just so present while she's going through her different, like, stresses. Like, I don't know if I could do this, and I don't want to drop things in front of you. And it's like, oh, it's so sweet. And she's so good.

[Kristen Davis]

But I also think Steve is a rare, secure, attached person. A secure, attached male, securely attached male character, whereas Miranda's avoidant. And I don't think we see. I mean, me, I've read one book on attachment theory. I'm like, a psychologist. But I think we don't see that many avoidant women on tv.

[Mary Beth]

No.

[Kristen Davis]

And I really appreciate. Not that I'm. That I'm definitely the insecure attachment type, but I think it was just. It's nice to see that dynamic where she just is, like, constantly pushing him away, and he's just like, no, and I want to move in with you.

[Mary Beth]

I know.

[Kristen Davis]

And they figure out how to cohabitate, and I think that's really beautiful. Obviously, that relationship takes a lot of different turns, but I just love him.

[Mary Beth]

I love him, too. And at the time, I didn't appreciate. I didn't fully understand how incredible he was at the time, because I was never there when they were working, really. And then also, I was like, what's gonna happen? I don't know. I didn't understand the trajectory. I mean, none of us did, I guess. Cause I don't even think our writers did. But I do love to look at it now with. Now that what we know. Because it actually does make sense.

[Kristen Davis]

I know.

[Mary Beth]

It really does.

[Kristen Davis]

It does.

[Mary Beth]

But there's a lot of people out there who don't feel that way. And to them, I apologize, but you.

[Kristen Davis]

Don'T have to apologize.

[Mary Beth]

You don't owe anyone anything. Well, I feel I. I do love, like. Like when people say, you know, we followed you, and I've. I didn't appreciate this, and now I do, or I felt this way about this at this time in my life, and now I feel differently. That's always so rewarding, right?

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

But then when people have the opposite of, like, no, that would never happen, then it's not rewarding. And then you feel sad that they. That they're not on the journey with.

[Kristen Davis]

You anymore, but they might rewatch it in two years and change their mind. Good point. So I. I was. I said before we started recording, watching the show in a relationship in your 30s and watching the show single in your 30s, completely different experience. I was so smug when I had a boyfriend. I was like, I figured this out. That they never. They couldn't get there. They got there eventually, but I figured it out. And then when you're watching it single, you just go, I am these women.

[Mary Beth]

So, Mary Beth, I just want to say to you, maybe I shouldn't say this on air. I want to say this to you. You are a complex person and you have a lot going on.

[Kristen Davis]

Yes.

[Mary Beth]

You do not need to be doing some kind of preconceived, like, small life with a boyfriend. I don't want that quote figured out.

[Kristen Davis]

I don't want that.

[Mary Beth]

Right. Like, you shouldn't even be saying these words.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh, I'm glad I'm not in those. Either of those relationships now.

[Mary Beth]

Good.

[Kristen Davis]

But it's just like, when you watch it single in your 30s, it's just like. That is. Yeah. This is what the experience. Experience is. And it presents so many different things.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

But to the audience, you have a.

[Mary Beth]

Lot to give, and you have a big career, and you need to put your energy there. This is my.

[Kristen Davis]

I have nowhere else to put it. Good. I put it into my friendships, my family, my career, my dog.

[Mary Beth]

That's fantastic.

[Kristen Davis]

That's it for.

[Mary Beth]

I totally approve. I totally approve of that. Good. I just don't want you to be thinking like, that you failed or that.

[Kristen Davis]

No, I think it's just like, it's feeling more like. I would love someone to watch Sex and the City with that loves it as much as I do.

[Mary Beth]

Well, for sure. And those people do exist, and they're gay guys.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

No.

[Mary Beth]

I had Adam Scott on.

[Kristen Davis]

He's married.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

I know.

[Kristen Davis]

And I'm happy for him.

[Mary Beth]

Right. Me too. Me, too. I'm just saying, at some point in his life, he wasn't. I don't know when he got married, but in his 30s, probably. Jody.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Mean.

[Mary Beth]

So, like, I'm just saying. They're out there.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

You know, don't settle in any way.

[Kristen Davis]

If you are a straight man who loves Sex in the City. My DMS are open.

[Mary Beth]

I love it. I love it. But the other thing is. And you know, this is bad that I'm gonna say it, but, like, sometimes you're not gonna love everything that the other person loves. Right. But that's okay.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

Do you know what I mean?

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

Okay, let's talk about Samantha briefly.

[Kristen Davis]

Okay.

[Mary Beth]

So Samantha's got this assistant. No memory of this storyline. Okay.

[Kristen Davis]

And neither do I, except rewatching. And I was like, oh, yeah, this is the guy that's like a macho sort of.

[Mary Beth]

I know. Weird. Weird. Right.

[Kristen Davis]

But I love that the episode is. And this is what Sex and the City does so well. It's the thematic nature of all the character storylines.

[Mary Beth]

Well, this is when we finally have first season, second season. Sometimes it clicks, sometimes it didn't. Now we've fully got it and I love it. But what I did love that the crux of their storyline also, because we have so many characters, as you guys do on overcompensating. Also, you know, you have a B, C, D storyline, right? So you always know that you might have D storyline this week and you'll have a better one next week, whatever. But what I. My favorite part about that, and I don't know if you've ever related to this or whatever. So she's got this assistant. He's very cute. You. You see her at the beginning. She's like, I can't find a good assistant in New York. And then he walked in the door and she's like, oh, ok, I'll hire you. But he's very arrogant. And so he's like yelling at people on the phone. And she's like, we don't do business like that, you know? And he's like, I do. So he argues with her, and then she eventually fires him and says, the good news is now we can. And so then they kiss, like in that frantic TV way that we did. And then she pushes him down on the desk and he goes, we can.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

On the desk.

[Mary Beth]

And he goes, no, on the chair. And she goes, no, on the desk. And then the voiceover says, and of course, Samantha was on top. Like, that is a dynamic that I see still find interesting with men about, like, who's in charge.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah, it's. It definitely, I think is still a huge not problem. But it definitely comes up in relationships, sometimes in subtle ways, sometimes not. But it's like if a woman wants to, you know, be in charge, quote unquote, then they're bossy. But if a man wants to be in charge, then he's just like, you know, being the man in the relationship. So I have had so many men call me bossy. I have never been called bossy by a woman. So I just find that really interesting, isn't it? And I love that Samantha, you know, say what you will, she's ethical. She's not gonna have sex with her employee.

[Mary Beth]

Absolutely.

[Kristen Davis]

She's only. She's not gonna abuse power. She's gonna have sex with him when she fires him.

[Mary Beth]

Most definitely. I love it very much. I love it very much. And I also love just the whole. That you want a strong man, right? Theoretically or whatever. But then who's gonna, who's gonna choose where you're gonna have sex?

[Kristen Davis]

Well, and then, you know, men are constantly saying like they want a strong woman, but situation. Sometimes their actions prove otherwise.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, I'm, I'm, I'm there.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

I'm there.

[Mary Beth]

I've been there many times. Many times. Many times. My, my ex, and I think I might have said this before, my ex at one point told me that I needed to stop telling the cab driver where to go. I had to wait. I had to get in the car in the back. This is pre Uber, right. And I had to wait for him to get in the car and he could tell the cab driver where to go. And I was just like, this is really hard.

[Kristen Davis]

It's just, it's the like nitpicking and, and I was in a relationship where I would always. Because my mom is like very brash and she is just in charge. She's the way we live in. My family's very mature.

[Mary Beth]

Six children.

[Kristen Davis]

Six kids. And she had to run it like the Navy.

[Mary Beth]

I can't imagine.

[Kristen Davis]

I only have two.

[Mary Beth]

It's hard.

[Kristen Davis]

I would walk into restaurants and I would say, oh, it's two for dinner, four for dinner, whatever it is. I never picked up on that ever.

[Mary Beth]

Right.

[Kristen Davis]

It was just like, I'm walking in first and I'm telling the, I'm telling the hostess what's needed.

[Mary Beth]

Why not?

[Kristen Davis]

And that was commented upon as like, every time we walk into a restaurant, you're the one saying, see, that is.

[Mary Beth]

Not the guy for you right now. I hung in with this relationship for a very long time where I did try to sit in the back of the cab and be quiet, but it's hard. And why should we have to do that? It's so weird. Why can't we just be equal partnership? It's an interesting thing to me. It's interesting how hard these things die. Like they just won't. Like they're ingrained, you know?

[Kristen Davis]

I know. And it doesn't matter. It's also, it's across generations and sometimes you'll meet someone who you think is so, so forward thinking, progressive. They really get it.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

But then they'll still have these little hang ups where you're just like, wow, that's just. I wasn't expecting that. Right.

[Mary Beth]

And why can't they work on it?

[Kristen Davis]

Well, that's me. That's just never gonna happen. I would love to find someone who's working on it because I'm working on it.

[Mary Beth]

I know. Because we're all working on it. Right. And we're trying, I know, but yet you're also supposed to be, you know, have a great career and be doing all these things on yourself and you know, blah blah ads. Right? Hard.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

AG's holiday 2025 collection is here. This season, AG explores the intersection of cinematic legacy and sartorial craftsmanship, drawing inspiration from the crews and directors behind the iconic spaghetti westerns of the 1960s.

[Mary Beth]

How exciting.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Set against the backdrop of Alabama Hills, a legendary location in film history, the collection channels a sense of sun, bleached grit, timeless style and quiet confidence. This collection is a tribute to the makers behind the lens, the costume designers, cinematographers and directors whose understated off screen style helped shape on screen legacy. Italian fabrications are at the forefront, paired with western inspired detailing and elevated utility pieces, shirt jackets, layered textures and modern silhouettes that make a statement without trying too hard. Denim remains the foundation, but it's reimagined with texture, depth and timeless wearability that define AG's DNA. The Holiday 2025 collection is available now at aggenes.com use code KRISTIN15 to take 15% off your next order, even if you've shopped AG before. Cool. I don't know about you guys, but I love to buy gifts. I love it so much. I love it so much more than getting gifts. But the one thing that I do love, especially when it comes to my.

[Mary Beth]

Daughter, is getting matching things.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

I know it's such a cliche, but.

[Mary Beth]

I love it so much so I.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Have the perfect brand for you. Pandora Jewelry can make their holiday unforgettable with a gift that says it all from Pandora Jewelry. A gift that tells a story and shows you know theirs that doesn't just sparkle but speaks. From new festive charms to forever rings and personal engravings, this season give a gift that's perfectly theirs. Whether you're shopping for a shiny surprise for your significant other, matching bracelets to celebrate your friendship, or a heartfelt gift for a family member. Say more this holiday season with Pandora. Shop [e-mail] or visit your closest Pandora store.

Before all the algorithm fed blah and the endless sea of dupes, shopping used to feel more, well, fun. But here's a confession Dirty Rush listeners. You can find that fun feeling again on ebay. It's not mindless scrolling. It's a fashion pursuit. I love using filters for condition and price saving searches and spotting verified listings. It makes shopping feel smart and exciting again. And when you score that rare Adidas Collab or that Dior saddlebag you've been manifesting it's a rush. Ebay has millions of pre loved finds from hundreds of brands backed by ebay's authenticity guarantee. Ebay things people love Tired of spills.

And stains on your sofa? Wash away your worries with Anabe. Annabe is the only machine washable sofa inside and out where designer quality meets budget friendly prices. That's right, sofas start at just $699. Enjoy a no risk experience with pet friendly stain resistant and changeable slip covers made with performance fabric Experience cloud like comfort with high resilience foam that's hypoallergenic and never needs fluffing. The sturdy steel frame ensures longevity and the modular pieces can be rearranged anytime. Shop washablesofas.com for early Black Friday savings up to 60% off site wide backed by a 30 day satisfaction guarantee. If you're not absolutely in love, send it back for a full refund. No return shipping or restocking fee fees every penny back Upgrade [e-mail] Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Flu season is here and our pharmacies have you covered with a free flu shot with most insurance plans. Plus it's cough and cold season. And now through December 2nd. Stock up on all the season's essentials and get ready for relief with discounts on items like Mucinex, cold and flu, Kickstarter, Mucinex, Fast Max products, Vicks Daquil and nyquil Combo pack Alka Seltzer. Plus also Airborne and afrin offers end December 2nd. Restrictions apply and offers may vary by location. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Mary Beth]

All right, is there anything else that we should say? Oh wait, this is the name. I love the name of the shoe of the show that that Charlotte is doing at the gallery. Drag Kings and the collision of illusion and reality.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

I love it.

[Mary Beth]

And I literally think that that gallery is the same gallery we film in. And then just like that, oh my.

[Kristen Davis]

God, it's still there. Well, that's amazing that it's still there.

[Mary Beth]

I know. Thank God. Because SoHo, the galleries are relatively unchanged, you know. Thank God, thank God, thank God they did not turn them into a store or whatever. Do you know what I mean? You know what I mean? Because you live there and then, I mean, I think Donovan is so adorable and good and like interesting and the whole bigger sock thing, I'm just kind of amazed in a way that we did it, you know, and that that was like the foreplay for the artist who made it.

[Kristen Davis]

Well, it's good writing, too. And that's what's so fun, I think, as an actor. And I've talked about this. Cause we do panels, we'll do screenings of overcompensating and then a panel, and they ask questions. And it's like, it's such a gift as an actor to be given these complex characters to work within. And then it's like, it's thoughtful writing where you're like, this is fun to play. And it's fun to do it a few times, you know, as it. As you imagine it. And then the director gives you an option, and it's like, there's just so much fun to be had.

[Mary Beth]

I agree. So much fun to be had. Now, when you looked at the. The. When you rewatched, knowing that we were going to talk, and you see the four of us talking about the bisexuality at the coffee shop, did you feel like we were very, very old school, or did you feel like, no, that. I understand why they would be like that?

[Kristen Davis]

I think when I rewatch the show, almost every topic you are talking about, I go, I understand why they had that approach to it in the 90s or early 2000s. It's like, it's about what, you know, the media you were exposed to, the people. You were exposed to how outwardly people live their lives. It's like there are so many storylines that I think even though if it wasn't handled the exact way that you would handle it today, it still put these stories in front of a huge amount of people that then say, oh, well, I saw Sex and the City episode about that. That where, you know, Samantha moves to the meatpacking district. And we're not saying everyone's represented perfectly because they're not. And that would be impossible to have that expectation.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah, we're gonna get there.

[Kristen Davis]

But I think it's. I just think it's great to even have the conversation and maybe people watch it and they go, well, you couldn't say that today. And it's like, well, yeah, they weren't saying it today. They were saying it when the show was made.

[Mary Beth]

It's true. For sure, for sure. For sure. And we didn't even have the knowledge. Obviously, you can't know where you're gonna go. Like, Samantha in that scene, the coffee shop scene, said that she's trisexual. She'll try anything, which is cute.

[Kristen Davis]

And I love that.

[Mary Beth]

I know, it's really cute. I mean, we wouldn't we would say polyamorous now or whatever. I don't know. I like that scene because I do feel also at the time, we're being very true to each character.

[Kristen Davis]

Absolutely.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

And that's what's so expertly done with the show is like, just. And I think the diner scenes are always my favorite. The brunch scenes.

[Mary Beth]

Really?

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah, they're just like. It's just girls chatting and they're. They feel safe because they know each other so well. They can say things that piss each other off, things that they wouldn't say in front of other people. They are so real with each other. And those are the relationships that I have in my life that I just value so much because I go, I could say something that I wouldn't post online, but I feel safe because I'm with my best friends.

[Mary Beth]

Of course. Of course. I mean, when I do watch them, they're so hard to film. And we would always be like, oh, God, the coffee shop's coming. And we had to have like every line, like, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. And we had to film it from every direction. And it would be like all day, all day, all day. But when I watch them back, what I love is all of the behavior. Like, there's so much interesting interaction between the four of us.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh. And it's like. It's like micro movements.

[Mary Beth]

Yes.

[Kristen Davis]

It's like also it's. It's really as. And as an actor, I think sometimes we don't even know that we're doing it when we're in the character. But then the editor picks up on it and you go, wow, that's. It is that scene when she's describing a pear shaped rain. And also then Miranda has to admit that she helped him pick it out. And it's just so good. It is so good.

[Mary Beth]

Can I tell you something funny? I remember about that at the time, you know, this was pretty much the height of the show in a lot of ways. And things started showing up kind of in, like, pop culture that we were like, what? And Gwyneth Paltrow was on the COVID of Vogue or something. And she talks about that episode in there.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh, my God.

[Mary Beth]

And we were like, you know, Gwen's talking about the ring. Because she was like, I so relate to, you know, someone having the wrong ring.

[Kristen Davis]

The wrong ring. It speaks volumes.

[Mary Beth]

It was good. It was good.

[Kristen Davis]

It was so good.

[Mary Beth]

All right, so wait, I have some things to say. Eddie Cahill. This was his first ever on screen role.

[Kristen Davis]

Wow, the bisexual.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

I liked also how they Wrote him as just like an everyday guy.

[Mary Beth]

I know and love how he's dressed.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

And they're ice skating, which I had also no memory of. Like, she's ice skating with a cigarette in her. Her hands.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

I know.

[Mary Beth]

With her natural curly hair. I loved it. Loved it so much. And I don't really remember it at all. At all. At all. Oh, apparently Sarah Jessica just talked about this episode with Howard Stern about kissing Alanis Morissette. She doesn't remember the scene because she doesn't like watching herself on tv. This is true.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh, my gosh.

[Mary Beth]

Then she said it was a big deal. I do remember that. I don't remember a lot, but I remember that for a variety of reasons. I remember where we shot at me take. I remember that I was wearing what I was wearing. Most importantly and least surprisingly, it was just a huge deal that she agreed to do the show. Yes. And I do recall kissing her. It was very pleasant. It was very professional. We were both treated. We both treating it as a contractual obligation. Sarah makes me laugh.

[Kristen Davis]

An actor's actor.

[Mary Beth]

Exactly. It was very nice. I don't actually recall feeling uncomfortable. I don't recall feeling embarrassed or self conscious. She was lovely and she was all in. I have no feelings other than that than easy and buoyant. Okay, that's nice reviews. I'm so glad. That's not what I remember, but I like it. Okay. Alanis Morris said on her kiss with Sarah Jessica Parker. What I remember is nerves. I just should be clear. I'm not remembering anything negative. I just remember nerves because it was like, not something that everyone involved would be normally doing. Sarah. Okay, wait. Alanis said this to the Advocate. Her character was meant to be reticent. So the kiss itself has got this push, pull, uncomfortable energy to it. But can you imagine Carrie being in New York and not having questioned her sexuality? Good point. Alanis. I love it. I love it. It's a good point because it was written very clearly that she is about to get up and walk away and say, not for me. It's just me. Which I also think is so important to know. Do you know what I mean? Oh, and she does have the very, very large Carrie brooch. I don't think it's the first time she's worn it, though. I think I already had seen, but it was smaller. This is when we go into, like.

[Kristen Davis]

This was the big flower.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah. With the boots.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, wow. That dress I'm wearing is theory. So we still don't have our budget. No offense.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Theory.

[Mary Beth]

And apparently, this is one of my most memorable looks. Who knew? I never know.

[Kristen Davis]

Most memorable.

[Mary Beth]

People respond to a lot of things that are interesting.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah. Well, I think people really cling on to different stuff, and it is depending on where they are in their lives.

[Mary Beth]

Of course. Where they are in their lives. And also, like, the current style, like, now, like, all the 90s 2000s stuff is like, these are my very vintage Prada 2000s.

[Kristen Davis]

Whoa. I just got a Jador Dior T shirt yesterday. Tank top at the RealReal. I've been on the hunt.

[Mary Beth]

Fantastic.

[Kristen Davis]

It's from 2003.

[Mary Beth]

You should. Well, that's the time.

[Kristen Davis]

It's fabulous.

[Mary Beth]

That's the time.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah. It's. It's everything to me.

[Mary Beth]

Good purchase.

[Kristen Davis]

They call it a grail.

[Mary Beth]

Yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

And those are a grail for sure.

[Mary Beth]

Well, thank you.

[Kristen Davis]

Prada cargoes.

[Mary Beth]

Thank you.

[Kristen Davis]

Hang on to those.

[Mary Beth]

Thank you.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Oh, yeah.

[Kristen Davis]

Put those in the safe at home.

[Mary Beth]

I. I have a large closet. That's a mess. Yes.

[Kristen Davis]

Hopefully it has a lock on it.

[Mary Beth]

It doesn't, but the house does.

[Kristen Davis]

Okay, good. So it's safe. It's safe, but.

[Mary Beth]

Okay, wait, wait. I feel like there's so many things that I might not have covered with you. Sometimes when I have to do the rewatch part, I'm like. It throws me off. Do you know what I mean?

[Kristen Davis]

Well, you can always have me back. And if there was an episode, maybe it's too soon, though. I think whoever gets to talk about Matthew McConaughey is that is one lucky guest because what a wonderful performance. Totally.

[Mary Beth]

That was off book. He. He got to ad lib, which was unheard of, but no one could stop him. I remember also getting texted that day, and I can't remember if I actually went. I would get texts from Sarah. We had our original blackberries, the tiny ones. She wore it on her little belt. There are all these cute paparazzi pictures of her. She got it first. She talked me into getting it. We talked all day. Even if we were together on the set. Do you know what I mean?

[Kristen Davis]

Of course.

[Mary Beth]

Of course. It's private that day because we were in LA where I had a house by that point, and McConaughey, like, jumping on the table, not in the script. Do you know what I mean? And she was like, he's outliving. What do I do? Because Michael Patrick was kind of against outliving.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh, my God.

[Mary Beth]

So Vince Vaughn ad libbed, but Vince Vaughn had Jon Favreau come, and they were, like, writing at the chairs.

[Kristen Davis]

Okay, interesting.

[Mary Beth]

Whereas McConaughey you just didn't know what was going to happen.

[Kristen Davis]

Such a fun stretch of episodes.

[Mary Beth]

I know, I know, I know. I was happy because we were here, but also, I do remember at one point, I don't remember the scene, but I. Because I had my house. They. I was with them all because Charlotte comes late to la, Right. So I was with them all. And then they were like, okay, go home, Kristen, because we're not going to get back to that group scene until I don't know what time I went home. I went to sleep, they called me, I got back up at like 3am I dropped stroke back to the set in West Hollywood. I mean, that. No, no joke, Mary Beth. I mean, we worked till the sun came up all the time. Wow. Like, it's amazing that we are all.

[Kristen Davis]

Functioning and friends because sometimes tensions can be high in those situations.

[Mary Beth]

Yes, yes.

[Kristen Davis]

Lack of sleep.

[Mary Beth]

I mean, that was all we did. So I think that was how we got to know each other so intimately. You know what I'm saying? Like, we went through it all, but it was also so our mission. Like, you know, when you have, like, how, I'm sure how you guys feel about overcompensating, like, it's, it's your baby, it's a dream.

[Kristen Davis]

You just want to make it as good as it can possibly.

[Mary Beth]

That's all that matters. Yeah, I know. Okay. We did talk about. Are you a Charlotte? Yeah. So how often would you say you feel like, yes, I'm a Charlotte?

[Kristen Davis]

All the time.

[Mary Beth]

Oh, okay.

[Kristen Davis]

A few times a day.

[Mary Beth]

The. The hopeful part is present.

[Kristen Davis]

Oh, it.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

Oh.

[Kristen Davis]

It's like, I really. Every time I get really badly hurt, I think, I can't do that again. I just need to protect myself more. But I also think there's a healthy approach of, like, I do just want to put my heart on the line because I think even if it's not handled with care, at least I'm showing that person that, like, yeah, we're still out here. And I love being sweet to people. I love going out of my way, acts of service, things like that. And I'm like, at some point I'm going to meet the right person who loves that about me and they're going to celebrate it. And. And I think for me, watching Charlotte navigate all of those relationships and all of those. The ones that don't end the way that she wants them to, it's like, yeah, we go through a lot as women who have hope, and I'm never gonna let that go. I just have to really embrace that side of me and go, well, I'm setting an example for you. Even if this feels intense to you or whoever's on the receiving end of it, I'm like, this is who I am. So if this is too intense, then we definitely shouldn't be together.

[Mary Beth]

Yes.

[Kristen Davis]

This is who I am.

[Mary Beth]

Yes. And also I think it's gonna help them, whether they're meant for you or not meant for you. I think it's good to be open. Open. I think it's super important.

[Kristen Davis]

And I love her design aesthetic as well. You do the apartment? Yeah.

[Mary Beth]

I think, oh, my God, I saw your bedroom. I was like, wow. Yeah, old fashioned. So surprised.

[Kristen Davis]

Yeah, I love, like, I have a lot of furniture that I've taken from my parents house. I have my grandma's desk. I just love that. Like, it feels very cozy to me. That's how my parents house is decorated. So I'm very old fashioned in that respect.

[Mary Beth]

I think that's so great because when you. If you just saw your comedy, you wouldn't realize.

[Kristen Davis]

No. And I'm like, dark wood. And that's very Charlotte everywhere. Very Charlotte and wallpaper. And I have a bed skirt.

[Mary Beth]

And not everyone can say that, yeah, I saw. No, but Charlotte would have all of those things. I do have a lot of those things. Not the dark wood. Not the dark wood. Because my house I grew up in had so much dark wood that sometimes I've just felt like it was just falling on you. You know what I mean? But thank you so much for being here.

[Kristen Davis]

My absolute pleasure. Thank you for having me.

[Podcast Host / Advertiser]

AG's holiday 2025 collection is here. This season, AG explores the intersection of cinematic legacy and sartorial craftsmanship, drawing inspiration from the crews and directors behind the iconic spaghetti westerns of the 1960s. Set against the backdrop of Alabama Hills, a legendary location in film history, the collection channels a sense of sun, bleached grit, timeless style, and quiet confidence. This collection is a tribute to the makers behind the lens. The costume designers, cinematographers and directors whose understated off screen style helped shape on screen legacy. The holiday 2025 collection is available now at aggeans.com use code Kristin15 to take 15% off your next order. Even if you've shoved a G before.

Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line, but.

[Kristen Davis]

First.

[Mary Beth]

There, the last one.

[Kristen Davis]

Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. As winter approaches, make sure you set aside some time for self care now through December 2nd. Get great savings on personal care essentials when you shop in store or online. Buy two participating self care items and save $3. Shop for items like TRESemme Shampoo, Dove Shampoo, Dove Men's Care Body Wash Wash, Dove Body Wash and Axe Shower gel, and save $3 when you buy two or more items. Offer ends December 2nd. Restrictions apply. Offers may vary. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[Advertiser]

If you're a maintenance supervisor at a manufacturing facility and your machinery isn't working right, Grainger knows you need to understand what's wrong as soon as possible. So when a conveyor motor falters, Grainger offers diagnostic tools like calibration kits and multimeters to help you identify and fix the problem. With Grainger, you can be confident you have everything you need to keep your facility running smoothly. Call 1-800-GRAINGER clickgranger.com or just stop by Grainger for the ones who get it done. Tis the season for identity theft. This time of year, most of us are checking off our holiday gift lists. But guess what? Identity thieves have lists too, and your personal information might be on them. Protect your identity with LifeLock. LifeLock monitors hundreds of millions of data points every second and alerts you to threats you could miss by yourself even if you keep an eye on your bank and credit card statements. If your identity is stolen, your own US Based restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed or your money back. And all plans are backed by the million dollar protection package. The last thing you want to do this holiday season is face drained account, fraudulent loans or other financial losses from identity theft all alone. Make this season about joy, not Identity theft. With LifeLock, save up to 40% your first year. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code IHEART or go to lifelock.com iheart for 40% off. Terms apply.

[Kristen Davis]

This is an iHEART podcast.