The A&G Replay Thursday Hour One

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand - The A&G Replay Thursday Hour One

Episode Date: July 2, 2026
Hosts: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty
Podcast: Armstrong & Getty On Demand (iHeartPodcasts)

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Episode Overview

This episode is a replay, featuring a collection of recent highlights — described as a mix of the “most amusing, insightful, wacky whatever” moments from recent weeks, plus some previously unheard audio from their "One More Thing" podcast. Both hosts are technically out (Joe is celebrating an anniversary, Jack is at home), but they provide new commentary and banter as they introduce classic and recent segments. The episode flows through personal stories, odd news, lively debates on social trends, and their signature blend of satire, skepticism, and cultural commentary.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Great Duck Rescue Saga

• Time: 03:41–13:38
• Context: Jack shares a detailed, comic, and ultimately heartwarming story about rescuing a brood of baby ducks from his backyard pool, aided by his animal-loving son, Henry.
• Details:
  • Jack arrives home to find neighbors with an “injured” baby duck and more ducklings in his pool.
  • Initial response: put the duckling back in the pool with its siblings and mom.
  • The “injured” duck is rejected by the mother; Jack and Henry have an emotional philosophical debate about natural selection and nature’s cruelty.
  • Research (including using ChatGPT) reveals ducklings can’t get out of pools and may drown; animal control doesn’t respond (“busy with college girls’ trans kittens,” jokes Jack).
  • Rescue operation: Using a pool mat and net, Henry and Jack collect the ducklings, caring for them overnight with towels and a hot water bottle.
  • The next morning, the mother duck returns—Jack ponders whether to reunite the ducklings, fearing the “touched by humans” myth might cause abandonment.
  • Group votes: Listeners and cohost (“that whole touching them thing is crap”) encourage Jack to try returning the ducks.
  • Quote:
    • Jack: “Am I going to raise them and homeschool them? Am I going to breastfeed them?... ChatGPT said 60 days before they can fly...” (11:11)
    • Henry names a couple of the ducklings; emotional investment grows.
• Memorable Moment:
  • Joe jokes: “Where have you been, you harlot?... Off with your drakes, doing your duck drugs or whatever.” (11:53)
  • This story serves as a playful, poignant meditation on modern parenting, animal welfare, and the intersection of nature and human intervention.

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2. Ace Hardware Sells Pie?

• Time: 16:49–18:46
• Topic: Bewildering discovery that hardware stores and auto parts stores sell unexpected food items.
• Details:
  • Joe and Jack are amazed at the quality of pies (“one of the best pies I’ve had”) sold at Ace Hardware.
  • Comparison to AutoZone's rumored “seafood boil in a bag” and jokes about baked goods at Famous Footwear.
  • Discussion of how hardware stores have knowledgeable staff compared to "depot"-type big chains.
• Quote:
  • Joe: “Are they going to start selling socket sets at the pie store now?... I’m intrigued by this idea.” (17:45)
• Tone: Equal parts incredulous and amused.

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3. Transgender Identity and Public Policy Satire

• Time: 22:51–26:18
• Topic: Clips featuring transgender influencers and ongoing culture debates.
• Details:
  • Played audio of a viral influencer accusing someone of misgendering her, claiming it’s “a felony in California.”
  • Hosts ridicule the legal misunderstanding and feigned outrage (“Not a felony, sir. You are wrong and dangerous. Dangerous, dangerous, wrong in your career.” – Jack, 23:46).
  • Second clip: A trans woman claims she’s denied a job at a “Cinderella” prom dress shop because she’s not a real woman; hosts support the store's policy due to the nature of the job.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Joe: “That’s not a crazy person at all. And it’s also a dude. That’s a crazy dude.” (24:01)
  • On women’s dressing spaces: “You know what I mean?... That guy, women’s spaces, bathrooms, prisons.” (25:54)
• Tone: Sarcastic with a critical, libertarian attitude toward enforced language and radical gender activism.

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4. Camel Beauty Pageant Botox Scandal

• Time: 26:30–29:42
• Topic: Lighthearted coverage of a real news story involving cheating at camel beauty contests in Oman.
• Details:
  • 20 camels disqualified for being injected with Botox, hyaluronic acid, and dermal fillers.
  • Detailed rundown of what judges look for: shiny hair, pendulous lips, well-shaped humps.
  • Ribald humor throughout; compared to Kardashians.
• Quotes:
  • Joe: “But that’s enough about the Kardashians.” (29:27)
  • Jack: “Do they do anything to accentuate the camel toe?” (28:36)
• Tone: Outrageously irreverent, riffing off the absurdity of the topic.

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5. Billy Idol’s Unorthodox Rehab Story + Going Analog Trends

• Time: 29:58–35:00
• Topic: Whiplash transition from drugs to technology to generational trends.
• Details:
  • Billy Idol explains on Bill Maher's podcast how he used crack to quit heroin (“It worked!” – 30:47).
  • Discussed Ted Gioia’s article on “being human is cool again”—people yearning for “flesh and blood,” tangible things (bookstores, vinyl) as AI saturates life.
  • “Can you be nostalgic for something you didn’t live through?” muses Jack, considering retro/analog trends among youth.
  • Meme culture: Hot memes now last “about two days”—the exhausting pace of content, the burnout of creators.
• Quotes:
  • On crack as rehab: “If this gets me off heroin, I’ll see if I can kick crack.” (30:47)
  • Jack: “My high schooler said there’s a mini trend for not being online at all... I hope it becomes really popular.” (33:31)

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6. Economics of Minimum Wage and Automation

• Time: 39:11–42:19
• Topic: Current labor market realities, especially in fast food, after raising the minimum wage.
• Details:
  • More applicants for fast food jobs, but actual hours and positions decreasing due to automation as businesses adapt to new labor costs.
  • “It’s just simple economics... every generation has to retry the Marxist thing.” (Jack, 39:26)
  • Referenced book: The Myth of the Rational Voter and how basic economics often feels counterintuitive, leading to policy mistakes.
• Quote:
  • Joe: “You can bait naive or stupid voters into voting for terrible economic policy over and over again... you have to know a little more than a little.” (42:19)
• Tone: Cynical, didactic but leavened with signature banter.

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7. Viral Fun & The Wealth of Online Humor

• Time: 42:19–44:07
• Topic: Celebration of viral internet humor.
• Details:
  • Highlighted a hilarious viral video about a bad haircut and user comments (available at their website).
  • Marveled at the sheer volume of funny, witty people online and mused about why even funny professional comics can stand out.
  • “Angry people and funny people” dominate the internet, plus “stunningly talented musicians.”
• Quotes:
  • Joe: “But yeah, they’re the quickest-witted sons of guns in the world.” (43:24)
  • Jack: “The Internet, we’re not built to take in that much from that many people, that many opinions, that much hate... It will make us all insane and kill us if we don’t step away from technology. But it’s pretty interesting.” (44:07)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Animal Tales & Family Life

• Jack, on duck rescue:
  “Am I going to raise them and homeschool them? Am I going to breastfeed them?... ChatGPT said 60 days before they can fly...” (11:11)

Social Satire

• Joe, on trans pronoun rant:
  “That’s not a crazy person at all. And it’s also a dude. That’s a crazy dude.” (24:01)
• Jack, on beauty pageants:
  “Do they do anything to accentuate the camel toe?” (28:36)
• Joe, camel contest:
  “But that’s enough about the Kardashians.” (29:27)

Social & Tech Critique

• Jack, meme lifespan:
  “How long do memes last now? About two days. Two days is how long a hot meme... lasts.” (34:14)
• Joe, internet overload:
  “The Internet, we’re not built to take in that much... that much hate... It will make us all insane and kill us if we don’t step away from technology.” (44:07)

Economics

• Joe, economics education:
  “You can bait naive or stupid voters into voting for terrible economic policy over and over again... you have to know a little more than a little.” (42:19)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Duck Rescue Story: 03:41–13:38
• Ace Hardware Sells Pies: 16:49–18:46
• Transgender Public Policy Satire: 22:51–26:18
• Camel Beauty Botox Scandal: 26:30–29:42
• Billy Idol & Analog Trend Discussion: 29:58–35:00
• Minimum Wage & Automation Debate: 39:11–42:19
• Online Humor & Viral Content: 42:19–44:07

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Tone & Style

The episode showcases Armstrong & Getty’s signature blend: acerbic, skeptical, occasionally outrageous, yet deeply rooted in common sense and curiosity about human nature. They blend personal anecdotes with biting social critique, always ready with a sarcastic zinger or unexpected tangent. Even when tackling heavier issues (economic hardship, social change), the tone remains brisk, conversational, and irreverently funny.

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Summary prepared for listeners who want all the insight and laughs, but none of the ad breaks.

Transcript

[Bethany Frankel]

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[Bethany Frankel]

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[Jack Armstrong]

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[Commercial Announcer]

Just head to CarMax.com for details and get pre qualified today.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wanna drive?

[Commercial Announcer]

CarMax, the first ever X Games League championship is going down live and New Orleans has the call. Three days of elite action sports. A season's worth of competition coming down to one final weekend. Watch July 24th, 26th on ABC, ESPN and ESPN2, or stream on the ESPN app, X Games, YouTube, Kick, Roku sports channel and Amazon. The championship starts July 24th. Don't miss the moment it becomes.

[Jack Armstrong]

Now, broadcasting live from the Abraham Lincoln radio studio at the George Washington Broadcast

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

Center, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty.

[Joe Getty]

Armstrong and Getty. And now here's Armstrong and get it.

[Jack Armstrong]

Not live from Studio C. Joe is celebrating his anniversary and I decided to take the day off.

[Commercial Announcer]

And yet I am here in spirit

[Joe Getty]

and in voice via the miracle of what we call recording.

[Jack Armstrong]

I'm here in voice, but not in spirit.

[Joe Getty]

I'm taking it. So we've assembled a bunch of the most amusing, insightful, wacky whatever clips of last several weeks, plus some unheard audio from the One More Thing podcast. Enjoy the Armstrong and giddy replay.

[Commercial Announcer]

The organizer of New York Santacon was accused of pocketing more than $1 million earmarked for charities.

[Joe Getty]

Oh my God. It sounds like Santacon might be some

[Commercial Announcer]

kind of Kringle scam. For those who don't know, SantaCon is an annual Christmas themed bar crawl slash crime against humanity. Pildis allegedly pocketed the SantaCon cash that was supposed to go to charities like City Harvest, City Parks foundation and the Children's Heart Foundation.

[Joe Getty]

My God, the only thing worse would

[Commercial Announcer]

be if this guy stole from wheelchairs for puppies with glasses.

[Jack Armstrong]

Similar to that sort of sentiment. As I am broadcasting from home today as I, Jack Armstrong and my son Henry, rescued using my finger quotes here because the story, the thought plickens got five baby ducks here rescued from the pool yesterday. Little tiny baby ducks. So how'd this all start? Oh, so I'm coming home from work yesterday and a couple neighbors standing in my yard and I get out of the car and the one neighbor that I don't know that well because they just moved in, said, hi, neighbor, because they don't know my name and that, and said, we have this baby duck and three of them just ran into your yard. And I, we don't know what to do. And I thought, okay, great, I got a situation here because I got other things, things to do. But she's holding this baby duck. This one's injured, she says, I think. And the other ones ran under your fence or in your backyard. And I said, okay. So I said, well, let me go check. So I go in the house and I yell to Henry, who's a super animal lover, my youngest, and I said, so here's the situation. I said, let's go look in the backyard, see if we can find those baby ducks. They're in the pool, they're swimming around. There's five baby ducks swimming around in the pool with their mom looking perfectly happy and So I go back out and tell the neighbors, oh yeah, there's. The mom is with the other baby ducks. They're in the pool. So let's just put this one in the pool. And, and I thought that was the best idea. Put the, this baby duck did not do well. I, this became a whole separate conversation with Henry and I. He was upset about it and mom was ignoring this duck. So the mom and the other baby ducks would swim over here. The, the, the, the something wasn't right with it. Duck was alone on the other side of the pool and eventually came out.

[Joe Getty]

That's tough for a kid to take.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, well, he, he's really big on because he's so, so into evolution and all this. He's a big natural selection guy. Oh, it was, it was painful because natural selection is painful. But he, he was a. You know, she had six ducklings. They weren't all designed to make it. She's protecting the five that are healthy.

[Joe Getty]

Blah, blah, blah.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's the animal world, the animal worlds. We don't do that in the human world, perhaps thanks to Christianity topic we were talking about a week or so ago.

[Commercial Announcer]

But

[Jack Armstrong]

this happens in the world. So the, the go out and that little baby duck is floating upside down. Oh, the other five very cute ducks though are chirping away and happier and heck with mom in the pool. And my thinking was they'll be fine. Let's just leave them alone. It's just like it's a pond or a little creek or something like that. They'll be fine. Henry said, I don't think they'll be fine. How they gonna get out? And I said I'm. Then they're probably mom carries moderately fly out or something. I mean they go to ponds all the time. You know, people don't gather around and

[Joe Getty]

figure out how to get the ducks

[Jack Armstrong]

out of the pond. It's been going on for millions of years. I'm sure it'll be fun. Anyway, he does some research. Turns out little ducks can't get out of the pool.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, that's how dogs drown in pools too.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, that I get. They can get in, but the dogs naturally can get out of pools. For some reason I assumed ducks could get out of ponds and all kinds of different water areas easily, but apparently they can't.

[Joe Getty]

A foul guess indeed.

[Jack Armstrong]

So did the research on that. He actually even used one of the chat bots, took a picture of the mama duck and the baby ducks and then something for comparison. And it gave us all the information on the ages and how far along they are in their ability to fly or get out of the pool or get help on. So it was very handy. But anyway, it was that they're not going to make it. They will be able to swim for hours, but they will, they will run out of juice at some point and they will, they will drown. And so that was an untenable situation. So called animal control got no response. I don't know if they don't deal with baby ducks, seems like in my town they probably do.

[Joe Getty]

We're a little busy with pit bulls, but thanks for the call.

[Jack Armstrong]

In my town, we ain't got no pit bulls in my town. Maybe, maybe, maybe somebody's got a trans cat that's got a problem.

[Joe Getty]

My, excuse me, my trans cat was just misgendered by my neighbor. I need you to get here right away.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's what our animal control is doing. Yes, some college girl has a trans cat. That's what animal control is probably doing here. But so anyway, so we get the. Trying to get the baby ducks out of the pool. Last night was much more of a ch than you might at first guess. I mean, how exactly are you going to do that? Mom had taken off. Middle of the day. I kept saying, mom will come back, Mama come back. She didn't come back. And we weren't sure why. Like if we got too close to the babies or who knows why. But mom just did not come back. We kept checking out there in the dark until it was getting pretty late. Well, now it's getting pretty chilly at night. Getting really late at night. No sign of mom.

[Joe Getty]

Probably a drug addict,

[Jack Armstrong]

right?

[Joe Getty]

I wonder if she knew they couldn't get out of the pool.

[Jack Armstrong]

Who knows?

[Joe Getty]

And she thought, oh, damn, look what I've done. I guess I'll go breed again because, you know, it's an animal.

[Jack Armstrong]

So hunter decides we got to get the ducks out of the pool. We haven't heard anything from animal control because they're busy with the college girls. Trans kitten. And so how do you freaking get little baby ducks out of the pool? And every time we go around to that side of the pool, they're huddled up in the corner all together trying to stay warm enough to not die. They'd swim to the other side. So. And Henry wanted to get this. So I eventually decided I'm going to do. We'll do it with the pool mat. And is that going to work or am I going to end up drowning them or what's going to happen there? But I fished several out with the Pool mat, bro. Put the duck back and.

[Joe Getty]

No, no, you don't understand. We got to get them out and,

[Jack Armstrong]

and, and Henry would take it out of the net with his hands. And we had gotten a cardboard box and putting some towels in there and a little bit of water and everything like that. And one by one, we got the. The ducks back. And did we end up getting all of them? Oh, geez, I can't. One ran off into the bushes. It fell out of his hands and ran off into the bushes. I'm not sure if we found that again. I think we decided four out of five is 80%. That's just as good as we can do in the dark.

[Joe Getty]

That'll get you na at Harvard.

[Jack Armstrong]

And we didn't know what to do, so we got the. No, there's five ducks in there. We must have found it. But there are five ducks in the box with the towel. Wake up this morning, I'd put a hot water bottle in there so they got something to be up against and be warm because baby ducklings can't regulate the temperature. We did all the research on baby ducks still alive in there. Okay, so things are going well. Not exactly sure what to do at this point. Am I going to raise them and homeschool them and do the whole.

[Joe Getty]

Am I going to breastfeed them? Yes.

[Jack Armstrong]

Am I going to raise them the I think it said on chat GPT60 days before they can fly and then let them go out and be ducks? Or will they no longer be able to be ducks if I ruined their ability to be wild animals? I don't. I don't know anything about this sort of say. Anyway, so my. I'm at home with these baby ducks so I can keep an eye on them. And my oldest son, I was just out there and he said, well, mom's waiting up by the pool. I said, what? I look out there and mom is sitting there by the pool looking really, really sad.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, mom duck.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, my mom duck came back. Where are my freaking babies? And she's been sitting there for hours now.

[Joe Getty]

Where have you been, you harlot? That's what I would ask. Mom. Duck off with your drakes doing your duck drugs or whatever.

[Jack Armstrong]

You know, I could go full Jerry Springer. Well, we'd like someone. We'd like to introduce you to. Mom. Here are your ducklings who say you abandoned them last night. The crowd.

[Joe Getty]

Jerry, Jerry, Jerry. Right,

[Bethany Frankel]

okay.

[Joe Getty]

Heck Jack, did you give them back?

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, that's what I'm trying to decide to do now, because according to Chat GPT. If we've touched the docks and mom can smell that she will abandon them.

[Joe Getty]

If that's legit or just an old wives talent, I would try to give them back.

[Jack Armstrong]

I'm gonna try that. So I think what I got to do, except I'm trying to wake up Henry. I got to do it during commercial breaks. I go, I guess I'll take the ducks and put them back out there and see if mom takes them back. Although I'm afraid they're going to get right back in the pool again.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, well, you got to do it live on the air and, and do play by play. Unless like mom decides to peck them to death. Then we'll go to break.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, geez. I'm a realist.

[Joe Getty]

I am all invested now.

[Jack Armstrong]

They're so cute. I was so happy this morning. I was a little worried I was going to walk out to the box and and find five not breathing ducks because they, they were wet and didn't get warm enough. Something like that. But they're all five huddled up in the corner against each other and breathing away and making little wheezy noises as they breathe the little five. It's just cute as heck. And Henry's named a cup. He was, he was enjoying. He's, he's such an animal lover because his brother was like and nature will figure it out. But he was, we've got to do that. And he said, oh, I'm gonna name you, you know, you little rascal. I can't get a hold of you. I mean he was just so into it.

[Joe Getty]

Now they got names. That's sweet though. I'm reminded of an incident I witnessed just the other day. I was at my local Walgreens where all the products are locked up because progressive policies have necessitated the hiding of items because of the cloud piven strategy to decriminalize crime and overwhelm the system and ruin our cities and usher and Marxism. But I depart from the anecdote. So there I was in the Walgreens and a duck came in and, and bought a stick of chapstick. The guy behind the counter says that'll be $2. And the duck says just put it on my bill.

[Jack Armstrong]

Hey.

[Joe Getty]

Well, that stuff about the cloud privet strategy is true.

[Jack Armstrong]

So your vote is I got a give mom a shot.

[Commercial Announcer]

Yeah, I would put the duck back. We.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, so you've got to can a duck look sad?

[Jack Armstrong]

Am I reading or am I reading the emotions into the look on this ducks? It just seems like its body language is so sad. Mom's sitting out there by the pool like, I've lost my babies. Which, you know, is one of the reasons why we're so baffled by the fact that human beings have stopped having children and. And don't seem to be bothered by it. Because any animal, any living being, it's like prime directive. Like, practically only directive is to have offspring and raise them. That's the only thing our bodies are designed to do. And so, you know, mom is beside herself questioning all her life's decisions sitting out there by the pool. I got one text saying, you may have broken a law in California. California. You might be careful about that. And I remember a member of the show, certainly not me, years ago, had dealt with some barn swallows and felt and found out that they had violated California law at a very. At the cost of a very, very high fine. So.

[Joe Getty]

But even federal law, right?

[Jack Armstrong]

Federal law, yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Migratory Birds act, which I got to

[Jack Armstrong]

believe they don't enforce in most states.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, that's not a bad point.

[Jack Armstrong]

So, I don't know.

[Joe Getty]

I got 30, maybe 40 stuffed bald eagles around my house, so let's not get too hung up on legalities.

[Jack Armstrong]

But I hope I haven't broke any duck law. Ducking laws. Your vote. Quick, before we take a break, Katie, is let him loose to the mom.

[Commercial Announcer]

Let. Let mom try. Because that whole touching them thing is. Is crap.

[Jack Armstrong]

I'm asking you not only because you're a woman, but you're a woman with child. So you are. I mean, you are nest. You.

[Commercial Announcer]

Woman with child who has saved a duck before and touched the hell out

[Joe Getty]

of it, and it was fine.

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay, next. Which is right now. I'm gonna go let those ducks loose, and I'll let you know how it happens.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, break ducks back, bro.

[Jack Armstrong]

Put the duck back. That's exactly what I'm gonna do.

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty, the Armstrong and Getty Show. Jack armstrong and joe getty, the armstrong and getty show.

[Joe Getty]

They sell pie at Ace Hardware.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's like the autozone seafood boil, but even better. BlackBerry apricot. BlackBerry blueberry. I'm gonna go strawberry rhubarb.

[Joe Getty]

I've had many a strawberry rhubarb pie in my life, and this one has

[Jack Armstrong]

a perfect amount of tang, and the texture is almost like pudding.

[Joe Getty]

I'm at a loss for words.

[Jack Armstrong]

This is probably one of the best pies I've had.

[Commercial Announcer]

Go to Ace Hardware, I guess, and get your pie.

[Jack Armstrong]

I like Tang myself. So my Ace Hardware sells pies? Yes, and I. I didn't know that they all Did I didn't know a

[Joe Getty]

chain thing completely unaware of this.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, mine does. And I've always said that's kind of weird but like right by where you check out they got a, a, a freezer case full of. They look like home baked pies. Frozen. You got to cook them for like an hour in the oven. It's not like a quick, you know, grab and go sort of pie but

[Joe Getty]

they're really idea was that and can I shake his hand?

[Jack Armstrong]

They're really good. And strawberry rhubarb is one of my favorite all time pies. But yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Are they going to start selling socket sets at the pie store now?

[Jack Armstrong]

What was the autozone seafood something or other. I don't know that one. Zatozone got live lobsters in a, in a thing by the checkout.

[Joe Getty]

That'll be 8.50 for your air filter. Would you like a nice bowl of ciopino?

[Jack Armstrong]

I need a new car battery. And that lobster there because that one looks delicious. Yes, Katie.

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

Yeah.

[Commercial Announcer]

Apparently autozone sells seafood boils in like a bag. So it has like the crab and horse corn.

[Joe Getty]

Stay in your lane. He says somewhat ironically.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow, who's I?

[Joe Getty]

Seriously? You know what we need to jazz up our hardware business is the selling of baked goods.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, if you had the scones at Famous Footwear, they're fantastic.

[Joe Getty]

That's just odd. Yeah, a lot of people who do

[Jack Armstrong]

kind of home projects, construction stuff, going to the hardware place, kind of person that's going to eat a pie on

[Joe Getty]

a whim, I guess impulse pie buyer. So you got your two by fours, you got your screws, you got your drill bits, you got a couple rolls of duct tape and the nice lady at the register says to you, were you able to find everything you say, yeah, but I really got to hanker in for pie and that just happens so many times. They decided I'm not against it, I'm just flabbergasted by it.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I couldn't find an apple pie, frozen apple pie the size of an NFL football. Do you have those? Oh yeah, we do. Right over there at Ace Hardware. They have people who can help you and answer questions that are. It's just fantastic. I've never compared prices. I just buy my stuff and leave. But it's worth something to have somebody there can actually answer a question for you whether it's where do I find this? Or how do you use this? Whereas some of your bigger locations. Giant, great, practically a depot for home construction stuff.

[Joe Getty]

I'm intrigued by this idea. There's not an employee to talk to anywhere no, no indeed no pies when

[Jack Armstrong]

your head starts to hurt cause the

[Joe Getty]

world is on fire Just turn to

[Jack Armstrong]

Jack and Joe they're your friends not

[Joe Getty]

your foes Just listen every day like

[Jack Armstrong]

an addict but you don't pay cause

[Joe Getty]

it's free the Podcast It's Armstrong and Getty on demand

[Commercial Announcer]

this July 4th, come celebrate at America's Block Party hosted by America 250. America's Block Party is a can't miss 4th of July concert happening at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum.

[Bethany Frankel]

Experience music, performances by major artists, patriotic tributes and the kickoff to giving 4th, helping to make July 4th the largest day of giving in American history.

[Commercial Announcer]

It's more than just fireworks.

[Bethany Frankel]

Join this landmark celebration and get your America's Block Party Tickets now for $17.76

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

at america250.org LA It's America's 250th, but you deserve some presents too. Simon Malls Mills and Premium outlets have can't miss sales July 3 to 5 join Simon plus our new rewards program for free and get 2.5 times the points. In addition to extra savings, cash back and offers that also [e-mail] grab the fam to a Simon center and make it a day for the books. It's a sale, a bration thing. Sign up [e-mail] rewards program terms apply. See SimonPlus.com for details.

[Commercial Announcer]

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile now. I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited premium wireless for $15 a month is back. So I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills, but it turns out that's very illegal, so there

[Joe Getty]

goes my big idea for the commercial.

[Commercial Announcer]

Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment

[Bethany Frankel]

of $45 for 3 months, $90 for 6 months, or $180 for a 12 month plan required $15 per month equivalent to taxes and fees. Extra initial plan term only greater than 50gb. Me slow when network is busy, see Terms. Summer is here, which means we all want to look and feel our best. A GLP1 may be right for you. Visit orderlymeds.com to learn more about which GLP1 you could be eligible for. Getting started is is fast, easy and happens virtually through telemedicine from licensed professionals. Check it out for yourself. Go to orderlymeds.com podcast that's orderlymeds.com podcast taking care of yourself feels great. Compounded medications are not FDA approved Eligibility required and determined by a licensed provider. Individual results may vary. See website for details.

[Commercial Announcer]

The first ever X Games League championship is going down live and New Orleans has the call. Three days of elite action sports. A season's worth of competition coming down to one final weekend. Watch July 24 through 26 on ABC, ESPN and ESPN2. Or stream on the ESPN app, X Games, YouTube, Kick Roku sports channel and Amazon. The championship starts July 24. Don't miss the moment it becomes history.

[Joe Getty]

The Armstrong and Getty Show. Speaking of the. The permanent omnicause and transgenderism is part of that. A couple of clips for you here. The first one is an influencer. I'm not going to torture you with the name. Which tells me. And it's all videotape, Right. This person, Katie, you brought us this clip. This is the sort of person who has encounters with people all day long hoping that they call him sir, Right? You guessing that's probably the case.

[Bethany Frankel]

Yeah.

[Commercial Announcer]

They thrive off of being misgendered.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Okay, Here you go. Listen to this.

[Jack Armstrong]

Sir, what do we think of Nick Fuentes? What pronouns are she, hers, she or

[Commercial Announcer]

hers means I'm a woman.

[Jack Armstrong]

The time you say sir is a felony in the United States of America, California, where we live in, it is.

[Commercial Announcer]

You need to look it up.

[Bethany Frankel]

It literally is.

[Jack Armstrong]

You need to have it read to you. Find someone. Find someone who can read what that means. Not a felony, sir. You are wrong and dangerous. Dangerous, dangerous, wrong

[Joe Getty]

in your career.

[Jack Armstrong]

Whatever the you think you are. Wow.

[Joe Getty]

Wow. That's not a crazy person at all. And it is also a dude. That's a crazy dude.

[Commercial Announcer]

Yeah. It's wearing a bra that's stuffed with socks.

[Joe Getty]

And here is a man masquerading nationwide felony.

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay.

[Joe Getty]

In the United States, California, where we are. Okay. A legal scholar as well. Congratulations, madam. And then this is a man masquerading as a woman who is going to a dress shop, name of Cinderella. Cinderella, which is. Well, you can describe it, Katie.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah.

[Commercial Announcer]

This is a store that's very popular for prom dresses and other formal attire.

[Jack Armstrong]

Did you get your prom dress there before you ran over the homeless person?

[Commercial Announcer]

No, I got it from a different shop, but I did go there. Yes.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Okay, so this is a shop that hires only women because they work with only women and high school girls and that sort of thing. Well, here's a fake woman who's upset at that.

[Commercial Announcer]

Hi, everyone, it's Emily.

[Joe Getty]

I'm here at the Wheaton Mall in Wheaton, Maryland.

[Jack Armstrong]

And despite this store being hiring, they

[Commercial Announcer]

have beautiful dresses I just went in

[Jack Armstrong]

and asked if I could be hired, and they told me that I couldn't because I'm not a woman and only

[Joe Getty]

a woman can work at that job.

[Bethany Frankel]

So.

[Joe Getty]

Cinderella in the Wheaton Mall.

[Jack Armstrong]

You're on notice.

[Bethany Frankel]

Sorry.

[Joe Getty]

Okay, you're a guy. And the very brief period in which people were bullied and cowed into saying, okay, you're a woman, it's over, sir. It's just over. So good luck to you in your future endeavors, which include apparently working in a girl's dress shop.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's.

[Joe Getty]

It's amazing.

[Commercial Announcer]

And I mean, the fact that they have that policy is wonderful because getting fitted for those dresses doesn't happen with your street clothes on.

[Joe Getty]

You know what I mean?

[Jack Armstrong]

Right? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That would make you incredibly uncomfortable.

[Joe Getty]

And that guy, women's spaces, bathrooms, prisons.

[Commercial Announcer]

But he thought he was doing something with that video because at the end he said, you're on notice. Sorry. He thought the whole Internet was gonna jump all over the store.

[Joe Getty]

Four years ago, that would have worked. Worked, yeah. During the woke apocalypse. God save us from ever having that happen again.

[Jack Armstrong]

By the way, not to get distracted, but go back and find the podcast where Katie explains why she ran over the homeless person on the way to the prom. There was a good reason. I had a very good reason.

[Joe Getty]

Pure malice. So speaking of beauty and standards of beauty, Jack, I'm now finally going to pay this off and you can't stop me. Another camel beauty contest is hit by a Botox cheating scandal.

[Jack Armstrong]

Botox on the camels. I'm just part of the camel.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, dude, we're just getting started. I'm gonna read this because it's really well written. In the gilded arenas of Omani cabel pageantry. Okay, we gotta stop there. We haven't even gotten to the first

[Jack Armstrong]

period in the camel beauty contest.

[Joe Getty]

Gilded arenas of Omani camel pageantry.

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay, so this isn't like a kind of a funny there being a campy and ironic lark. This is a serious thing.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's like dog shows.

[Joe Getty]

All right, I'm going to continue on because again, it's well written, blah, blah, blah. Omani camel pageantry. Where the desert wind carries whispers of ancient Bedouin pride in the scent of freshly groomed dromedary. Beauty has always been a serious business. But this February, the 2026 Camel Beauty show festival in Al Musana, the pageant's quest for the perfect camel hit an all too familiar hump. Boy. 20 contenders were unceremoniously disqualified from the camel beauty contest after Veterinary inspectors discovered that they had been enhanced. For instance, hyaluronic acid injections were used to plump those signature pouty lips.

[Jack Armstrong]

Pouty?

[Joe Getty]

Oh my God, Use the word adjective.

[Jack Armstrong]

Pouty for animals.

[Joe Getty]

Lips. I'm really disgusted. Bunch of camel numbers.

[Jack Armstrong]

Anyway.

[Joe Getty]

What? Let's see. Oh, used to plump the signature pouty lips. Dermal fillers and silicone for a more statuesque nasal profile. Botox to soften the face into an expression of perpetual serene superiority. Silicone wax to inflate the hump.

[Jack Armstrong]

Just so, do they do anything to accentuate the camel toe?

[Joe Getty]

No, no, the toes are fine. Hormones. Excuse me, My allergies are really acting up. Hormones to sculpt the kind of muscular definition that would make a crossfit camel blush. Blah, blah, blah. So, yeah, they go crazy grooming and altering these camels to make them more beautiful to win the damn pageant.

[Jack Armstrong]

And if you use Botox, it's cheating, apparently.

[Joe Getty]

Camel beauty contest consists of four main categories. Coat, neck, head and hump. Judges look for shiny hair with definable color. That's what I looked for when I was dating. A long and elegantly wide neck, a large head with pouty and pendulous lips.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's right.

[Joe Getty]

But that's enough about the Kardashians. That match long dark eyelashes and a shapely hump with excellent posture. Well, multiple humps in the case of the hard Kardashians, but again, similar.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's. I'll be darned.

[Joe Getty]

And you know what? They got the big picture on this article. That is a damned attractive camel.

[Jack Armstrong]

I mean, we go pretty. We go pretty far with our dog shows, Westminster and everything like that. But I don't remember anybody ever injecting Botox or anything into a dog or getting caught or anything. I don't remember anything like that.

[Joe Getty]

All right. In another story that's apropos of nothing but at least somewhat amusing, Billy Idol did Bill Maher's club random show. Is that where they sit around in the basement? Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

Get high?

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, essentially. I'm not sure if he did, but he talked about how smoking crack helped wean him off of heroin. He's previously revealed he nearly died of a heroin overdose in London in 1984. Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

And he was a young man and

[Joe Getty]

he said, once you're trying to get off heroin, what do you go to? You gotta go to something else, said the 70 year old, incredibly botoxed and plastic surgery former punk. He says, I started smoking crack to get off heroin. And Mars said, do you really do that he said, yeah, it worked. It worked.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow. That's a heck of a.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, yeah. He said there was super strong heroin around and he was hooked and he knew he had to get away from it. And he thought, maybe I stand a better chance of kicking something else because it almost killed him. And he thought, look, if this gets me off heroin, I'll see if I can kick crack. Wow. Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

And apparently he did.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Yeah. He says he can now imbibe once in a while without it affecting him. He has a glass of wine now and again. Huh. Interesting. All right, that's enough of that. And then finally this one. We don't really have time to get into this, but I thought it was interesting and worth mentioning. Ted Joya, who, what was the article he wrote that was so.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, oh, oh.

[Joe Getty]

He was one of the first guys to really write eloquently about. He wrote that brilliant article. We talked about a lot about how we've gone from entertainment that's hour or hours long, to tiny little short things, to not even being entertained. It's just the attention economy. They just want your attention. You get that weird burst of adrenaline that's like a heroin addict. You need it just to feel normal. Then they sell you ads and nobody's, you know, super happy or anything, but. So he was the guy who brought us that idea. He's a really interesting thinker. But anyway, this piece is Being Human is Cool again. As AI saturates everyday life, people are seeking refuge in of front flesh and blood alternatives from bookstore signings to vinyl record sales. And he thinks a lot of this stuff isn't just nostalgia or being hip. It's the physical reality of things. Appeals to people on a level they don't even understand.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, can it be nostalgia if you're too young to have ever done it? That's not nostalgia. That's something different.

[Bethany Frankel]

Right.

[Jack Armstrong]

So it's almost got to be something. Like I want a physical something.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. And there could be some sort of throwback hipster cool to it. I remember back when I was skinny enough, skinny enough to pull it off, I'd go to shops and look for like really cool, what would you call it? Vintage, like suits, like the Rat Pack would wear. I've never thought. But that's when I discovered that they all had 28 inch waist.

[Jack Armstrong]

Can you be nostalgic for something you didn't live through? Like I was looking at some antique motorcycle like from the 50s I thought would be cool. That's long before I was born. Is that nostalgia or I don't know what it is. It doesn't make any difference.

[Joe Getty]

I don't think so. I have, like, antique bookshelves and stuff like that. And just because I like them, because they're old and cool anyway, maybe we can get into this more tomorrow or something like that.

[Jack Armstrong]

But if kids are going to more physical kids, people in their 30s or 40s, I'm a very old man. My son, my high schooler, said there's a bit of a mini trend for not being online at all. Not like looking at your phone, not having any social media. He said, that's kind of becoming popular. And I thought, I hope it becomes really popular. I hope it becomes the next craze. Although he mentioned a meme the other day, some meme. He said, that's a hot meme right now. And I said, how long do memes last now? And he said, about two days. Two days is how long. You know, a hot, like meme that you could say around your friends and get a laugh and be cool lasts two days.

[Joe Getty]

So you've got to be constantly aware of it and on social media to be hip. And I've heard so many stories, it's practically becoming a cliche if you're into this sort of thing. But content providers have to churn out so much content so constantly, and there's so much pressure because there's so much competition. They work themselves to death, and a lot of them finally give it up.

[Jack Armstrong]

Cal, when I was young, a cool meme or phrase might last months or a year. I know my two days. And on day three, if you say it, you're kind of a lame. O. Hey, that was Wednesday. All right, Wednesday. That was funny. It's not funny now. It's Friday.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, Wednesday called. They want their meme pack. Wow. Yeah. Here today, gone today.

[Jack Armstrong]

And you feel pressure to, like, you said, be up on that? I guess.

[Joe Getty]

Could it be that this stuff is so noxious? I don't know if everybody will catch on, but a lot of people will catch on. Hey, this is making me unhappy. I'm not doing it anymore.

[Jack Armstrong]

That would be awesome. Like I say, I hope someday looking at your phone is like smoking. You can't believe that people used to do it.

[Joe Getty]

It's rude. Yeah, I. I am voting in favor of that.

[Jack Armstrong]

Or unhealthy, even if it's not rude. It's just so incredibly healthy. Walk somebody. You see somebody smoking cigarettes. Oh, you know, a guy or girl. Oh, they look at their phone. Not interested in that.

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

The Armstrong and Getty show.

[Joe Getty]

Get more Jack, more Joe podcasts and

[Commercial Announcer]

our hot [e-mail] this July 4th, come celebrate at America's Block Party Hosted by America 250, America's Block Party is a can't miss 4th of July concert happening at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum.

[Bethany Frankel]

Experience music, performances by major artists, patriotic tributes and the kickoff to giving 4th, helping to make July 4th the largest day of giving in American history.

[Commercial Announcer]

It's more than just fireworks.

[Bethany Frankel]

Join this landmark celebration and get your America's Block Party Tickets now for $17.76

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

at america250.org LA It's America's 250th, but you deserve some presents too. Simon Malls, mills and premium outlets have can't miss sales. July 3rd to 5th join Simon plus our new rewards program for free and get 2.5 times the points. In addition to extra savings, cash back and offers that also [e-mail] grab the fam, head to a Simon center and make it a day for the books. It's a sale, a bration thing. Sign up [e-mail] rewards program terms apply. See SimonPlus.com for details.

[Bethany Frankel]

Summer is here at Orderly Meds, we know this time is a reminder that life is is full of new beginnings. Whether you're celebrating the nice weather, starting a new chapter, planning a vacation, or simply looking ahead to what's next, this season can be the perfect time to invest in yourself and your health. If you've struggled with weight loss and are curious about GLP1 medications, orderly meds can help you learn about your options. Through a simple virtual process, you can connect with licensed medical professionals who can determine whether treatment may be appropriate for you. Getting started is fast, convenient and happens online from the comfort of home. This summer, consider a new approach to feeling your best. Visit orderlymeds.com podcast to learn more. That's orderlymeds.com podcast orderlymeds.com podcast because every new season is an opportunity to take the next step forward, compounded medications are not FDA approved, eligibility required and determined by a licensed provider. Individual results may vary. See website for for details.

[Commercial Announcer]

The best skaters, BMX riders and moto athletes in the world don't compete in leagues until now. The X Games League Championship is live From New Orleans, July 24 through 26. Three days of elite action sports, plus performances from metro Boomin, Jid Subtronics and bunt watch on ABC ESPN and ESPN2 stream stream on the ESPN app, Roku Kick, Amazon and X Games YouTube. The inaugural champion gets crowned this July.

[Bethany Frankel]

This is Bethany Frankel from Just Be with Bethany Frankel. Most dog food is marketing, not nutrition. That is why Biggie and Smalls eat just food for dogs. Real 100 human grade food with ingredients I actually recognize. And yes, I do see the difference. Better digestion, healthier skin, more energy. Dogs that feel better. My babies. If you've been on the fence about switching, stop overthinking it. What's more important than your furry babies and their health? Go to justfood for dogs.com right now and get 50% off your first box. No code needed. Just try it.

[Jack Armstrong]

The Armstrong and Getty show.

[Bethany Frankel]

The study shows more people are applying for fast food jobs, but many are

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

not seeing increased hours or even securing employment at all.

[Bethany Frankel]

It also flies. Businesses are cutting shifts, customers are paying

[Joe Getty]

higher prices and more machines are replacing workers.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, because it's just simple economics and it has happened over and over again. It gets that thing we've been talking about lately that like every generation or so you have to like retry the whole Marxist thing or socialism to price

[Joe Getty]

controls because it sounds like it would work.

[Jack Armstrong]

I understand why, you know, I would have made sense to me when I was 20 years old. It sounds like a good idea. We got to raise the minimum wage for fast food workers. It's not fair that they get. But then the reality of all the things you just heard there, that the businesses can only charge so much for a burger and stay open and even with that they started charging more for the burgers but they're going to cut your hours back or get machines to do the job or all kinds of different things to get around it because the economics don't change.

[Joe Getty]

And that one franchisees cutbacks was 62 jobs. 62 full time jobs.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right, right, right.

[Joe Getty]

There's a great story about that Starbucks in Seattle that unionized and they went on strike. Well, all those people are fired and that Starbucks is. And they are ineligible to work at another Starbucks because you don't bring a business to its knees and it forgives you and says yeah okay, we'll pay you more and just completely ignore the math that we have to do every day. Just I get naivete and I get knowing just enough to be dangerous because we all go through that. But boy howdy, the very basics of economics and how prices work is something every kid. Oh man, I was about to say every kid ought to walk out of school knowing. Unfortunately a lot of them don't walk out of school knowing how to read enough to know that. But yeah, you've got to know that

[Jack Armstrong]

the minimum wage thing and rent control and all these different things have been tried over and over with the same disastrous result. And then, yeah, the, the poly, some of the politicians pitching them to, you know, they don't work. But it's just good populist politics. Some of them, they're just, they, they are idiots also. They, they don't know that this hasn't been tried over and over again.

[Joe Getty]

I think this is the one millionth time I've recommended at least the first few chapters of the Myth of the Rational Voter, which is a fascinating book. Came out 20 years ago, 15 years ago. It talks about, for some reason on economic issues like this, a far greater number of people than chance get it wrong. It's at first blush counterintuitive. So many things in economics. There's something about it. If you just know one thing, you're going to get it wrong over and over again. You have to go another step and another step beyond it when you look at economics to understand how it really works in huge numbers. So yeah, you can bait naive or stupid voters into voting for terrible economic policy over and over again because you have to know a little more than a little.

[Jack Armstrong]

So we're going to post something apropos of nothing at the website that is hilarious. And I don't believe in overselling things.

[Joe Getty]

And I am to some extent a professional humorist. It may be the funniest thing I've ever seen. I've had to pause it twice now because I was laughing so hard I thought I might die. It's all built around a guy selling it.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's all built around a guy who got a bad haircut. And then the comments on the Internet and what I take away from it, not only is it one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life is there are so many funny people in the world. Oh yeah. The fact that anybody can make a living being funny is amazing given how many funny people there are in the world.

[Joe Getty]

Oh yeah, yeah. It's more a question because I've, I've said this through the years I've known like cops especially and firefighters and guys like construction workers who spend umpires who spend all their time around other guys sharpening their wit all day long. They're the funniest people in the world. They just haven't done the work to have a career doing that.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right.

[Joe Getty]

But yeah, they're, they're, they're the quickest witted sons of guns in the world.

[Jack Armstrong]

So if you Want something funny, go to armstrongandgetty.com we got it posted there for you. Also retweeted it so. But man, there are a lot of funny people on the Internet. Angry people and funny people.

[Joe Getty]

If it's humbling, if you're at work and you have a door, close your door before you watch it. It is perfectly safe for work, but your dignity will be gone.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh yeah, so many funny people. So many crazy angry people online and then so many just hilarious, snarky people.

[Joe Getty]

Stunningly talented musicians.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right? Exactly. Exactly.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

You know, living our lives of quiet desperation and being those other things apparently.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, the Internet, we're not built to take in that much from that many people, that many opinions, that much hate, that much violence, all of it. It will make us all insane and kill us if we don't step away from technology. But it is pretty interesting. Armstrong and Getty

[Commercial Announcer]

this July 4th come celebrate at America's Block Party. Hosted by America 250, America's Block Party is a can't miss 4th of July conference happening at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum.

[Bethany Frankel]

Experience music, performances by major artists, patriotic tributes and the kickoff to Giving Forth, helping to make July 4th the largest day of giving in American history.

[Commercial Announcer]

It's more than just fireworks.

[Bethany Frankel]

Join this landmark celebration and get your America's Block Party Tickets now for $17.76

[Producer or Promo Announcer]

at america250.org LA It's America's 250th, but you deserve some presents too. Simon Malls, mills and premium outlets have can't miss sales July 3rd to join Simon plus our new rewards program for free and get 2.5 times the points. In addition to extra savings, cash back and offers that also [e-mail] grab the fam, head to a Simon center and make it a day for the books. It's a sale, a bration thing. Sign up [e-mail] rewards program terms apply. See SimonPlus.com for details.

[Bethany Frankel]

There's a fire inside you you can't ignore. Stand still. Not a chance. You're a lifelong learner who's come this far. Now we're here to help you keep going further. Capella University what can't you do? Visit capella.edu to learn more. Summer is here at Orderly Meds. We know this time is a reminder that life is full of new beginnings. Whether you're celebrating the nice weather, starting a new chapter, planning a vacation, or simply looking ahead to what's next, this season can be the perfect time to invest in yourself and your health. If you've struggled with with weight loss and are curious about GLP1 medications, orderly meds can help you learn about your options. Through a simple virtual process, you can connect with licensed medical professionals who can determine whether treatment may be appropriate for you. Getting started is fast, convenient and happens online from the comfort of home. This summer, consider a new approach to feeling your best. Visit orderlymeds.com podcast to learn more. That's orderlymeds.com podcast orderlymeds.com podcast because every new season is an opportunity to take the next step forward, compounded medications are not FDA approved, eligibility required and determined by a licensed provider. Individual results may vary. See website for details.

[Commercial Announcer]

The best skaters, BMX riders and moto athletes in the world don't compete in leagues until now. The X Games League Championship is live From Newark, Orleans, July 24th through 26th. Three days of elite action sports, plus performances from metro Boomin, Jid Subtronics and bunt watch on ABC ESPN and ESPN2 stream on the ESPN app, Roku Kick, Amazon and X Games YouTube. The inaugural champion gets crowned this July.