A Job & Erections -- That's All You Need, Son!

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand: Episode Summary

Episode Title: A Job & Erections -- That's All You Need, Son!
Release Date: April 24, 2025
Host/Authors: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty
Publisher: iHeartPodcasts

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1. Introduction to Health Span vs. Lifespan

The episode opens with a deep dive into the concept of health span—the period of one’s life spent in good health, free from chronic diseases and disabilities—as opposed to mere lifespan. Joe Getty emphasizes the importance of quality of life over simply extending it.

• Joe Getty [02:05]: "Health span is going to be a term you hear a lot. Instead of lifespan all the time. The span of your life where you're able to do stuff and enjoy your life."

Jack Armstrong concurs, expressing concern over medical advancements that prolong life without ensuring quality, effectively keeping individuals alive in pain and discomfort.

• Jack Armstrong [02:34]: "It does not seem to fit with the reality of being a biological being. It just seems like an experiment as opposed to automatically a good idea."

2. Critique of Contemporary Comedy and Media

The hosts transition to a critique of modern comedy, specifically targeting Greg Gutfeld's style. Joe Getty criticizes Gutfeld for pitting individuals against political lines, often making derogatory remarks about those on the right.

• Joe Getty [01:14]: "A lot of his jokes are just pick somebody people on the right hate and then just say something really mean. Call them fat or ugly."

Jack Armstrong agrees, noting this as a recurring theme in contemporary humor.

• Jack Armstrong [01:31]: "That seems to be a recurring theme."

3. Greenland Ice Harvesting for Luxury Beverages

Shifting to lighter topics, the hosts discuss the entrepreneurial trend of harvesting glacial meltwater from Greenland to produce premium vodka and cocktails in Dubai. They highlight the marketing gimmickery and environmental concerns associated with transporting ancient ice.

• Joe Getty [06:21]: "My parents did this. They had drinks on a big boat with chunks of glacier ice, 60,000-year-old pure water."

Jack Armstrong mocks the cost and practicality of such ventures.

• Jack Armstrong [07:00]: "The environmental trade-offs of hauling ice chunks from the Arctic to a nightclub in Dubai are questionable."

4. The Rise of Looks-Maximizing Influencers

A significant portion of the episode focuses on the alarming trend of looks-maxing influencers—individuals promoting extreme and often dangerous methods to enhance physical appearance. The hosts discuss practices like mewing and the hammer technique, questioning their efficacy and safety.

• Joe Getty [09:10]: "Women aren't worried about your shin length or the mewing of your jawline or the poutiness of your lips. They want a guy who doesn't play video games all the time and can keep an erection, has a job."

Jack Armstrong sarcastically suggests transforming into a "job and erection maxing influencer."

• Jack Armstrong [12:17]: "You get a job and keep an erection, and you're good, son."

5. Media Focus on the Pope's Death

The hosts express bewilderment over the media's persistent focus on the Pope's death, questioning its relevance and the public's fixation on it.

• Joe Getty [04:46]: "How come more people don't come to that conclusion?"

• Jack Armstrong [17:08]: "When you guys in front of him."

They discuss the emotional reactions people have when interacting with the Pope's presence and subsequent death.

6. Insights into Iran’s Political Climate and Potential Conflicts

A substantial segment is dedicated to the geopolitical tensions surrounding Iran. The hosts relay insights from NBC News’ Richard Engel, highlighting Iran's internal changes and the escalating threat of military action by the United States and Israel.

• Richard Engel [20:12]: "The Iranians are taking these talks extraordinarily seriously. People hope that they will end sanctions."

• Joe Getty [21:20]: "Iran's going to be top of mind when that happens. Israel sending commandos into Iran is a serious concern."

Jack Armstrong critiques the leaked war plans detailed in the New York Times, suggesting they indicate severe distrust and preparation for potential conflict.

• Jack Armstrong [26:16]: "Those were US Plans, Israeli plans or a combination. That's treasonous."

7. Harvard University and the Transformation of American Academia

The episode shifts focus to a critical analysis of Harvard University, drawing from Matt Taibbi's observations. The hosts discuss how prestigious institutions have devolved into bureaucratic entities, diluting academic excellence with entitlement and mediocrity.

• Joe Getty [31:48]: "Almost everybody was a yes. But the reason for the yes was the networking, the contacts you make. None of it was the education."

• Jack Armstrong [33:38]: "Harvard is the ultimate example of an institution that's become more bureaucracy than university."

They debate whether such institutions can reclaim their former glory and the role of elite networking in perpetuating their status.

8. Final Thoughts and Crew Banter

In the concluding segment, the hosts share personal anecdotes and humor, touching upon topics like construction crews' authentic lunch practices and the absurdity of government notifications.

• Joe Getty [30:26]: "The Department of Homeland Security accidentally sent out notices that said it's time for you to leave to US citizens."

• Jack Armstrong [35:45]: "Instead of bringing packaged lunch or going out to McDonald's, they've set up their own taqueria. They’re eating fresh made hot tortilla tacos for lunch."

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Joe Getty [02:05]: "Health span is going to be a term you hear a lot. Instead of lifespan all the time. The span of your life where you're able to do stuff and enjoy your life."

• Jack Armstrong [01:31]: "That seems to be a recurring theme."

• Joe Getty [09:10]: "Women aren't worried about your shin length or the mewing of your jawline or the poutiness of your lips. They want a guy who doesn't play video games all the time and can keep an erection, has a job."

• Joe Getty [31:48]: "Almost everybody was a yes. But the reason for the yes was the networking, the contacts you make. None of it was the education."

• Jack Armstrong [33:38]: "Harvard is the ultimate example of an institution that's become more bureaucracy than university."

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Conclusion

In this episode, Armstrong and Getty navigate through a myriad of topics, from the philosophical debates on health span to sharp critiques of modern societal trends and geopolitical tensions. Their blend of humor and critical analysis offers listeners a comprehensive overview of pressing issues, all while maintaining their signature conversational style.

For those who haven't tuned in, this episode serves as a testament to the hosts' ability to intertwine serious discussions with lighthearted banter, providing both insight and entertainment.

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Note: Advertisements for Dutch Veterinary Services are present at multiple intervals but have been excluded from this summary to focus solely on the content-rich segments of the episode.

Transcript

[Unknown Speaker (Dutch Advertisement)]

Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra precious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 24,7 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free. With Dutch, you'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care.

[Jack Armstrong]

Broadcasting live from the Abraham Lincoln radio studio at the George Washington Broadcast Center, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty. Armstrong and Getty. And now here's Armstrong and Getty. A group of firefighters in England were able to rescue a horse from a five foot ditch using a system of ropes and pulleys. It's the same technology they use every morning to get Joy Behar out of her Uber. Funny cuz it's true. Funny cuz it's true.

[Joe Getty]

I, I like Greg Gutfeld Felt and my parents watch him every single night. But like a lot of his jokes are just pick somebody people on the right hate and then just like, I don't know, say something really Me. Call them fat or ugly. Yes, yes.

[Jack Armstrong]

That seems to be a recurring theme.

[Joe Getty]

Pick somebody they hate on the right and call them fat, ugly or stupid. Then we laugh and we move on to the next victim. How many days in a row it's been four now, Is that right? How many days in a row will the Pope dying be the lead story on the evening newscast, I wonder. It's extraordinary to me. But more on that coming up in a little bit. I want to talk about that. Oh, I just came across the term. This is, this might be the most important thing you learned today. Health span is going to be a term you hear a lot.

[Jack Armstrong]

Ah.

[Joe Getty]

Instead of lifespan. Instead of lifespan all the time. The average lifespan is a male men live to be 82, women live to be a blah, blah health span. Like the span of your life where you're like able to do stuff and enjoy your life. Who cares if you live another five years of laying in bed in pain? What's the period of time I get to where I'm like actually enjoying life? Health span, Right.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, I care, but I see your point. That's not what we're shooting for. Right?

[Joe Getty]

Right. I think it's a good idea to change our focus on that. I've said this many times. My doctor said to me, actually sometime last year, he said, sometimes I wonder what, what, what's the goal here because there's just a lot of extending life in pain and misery and can't do anything.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yes.

[Joe Getty]

Health span. That's what we need to work on.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I, you know, this is a heavy and complicated topic, but yeah, the stringing it along at any expense and pain and, and whatever treatment is available and it just, it seems not right. It does not seem to fit with the reality of being a biological being. It just, it seems like an experiment as opposed to automatically a good idea. We're going to use machines and drugs and procedures to keep this body functioning at a minimal level so we can say it's alive. Let's see what happens. Meanwhile, I, as the owner of the body, are thinking, I don't want to do that experiment.

[Joe Getty]

No, I'm not. I mean, it's easy to say that.

[Jack Armstrong]

We don't last forever.

[Joe Getty]

I don't know what it feels like to be 90 and laying in bed. And I know I'm never gonna do a lot of different stuff.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. Matter of degree, of course.

[Joe Getty]

Sure.

[Jack Armstrong]

And varies by the individual on a much lighter note. Cuz everything's a lighter note. Michael. Do we have any transition? One more before the transition. Life and death. Little more life and death before the fun stuff. Folks, I think about this a lot.

[Joe Getty]

Because I, I should read more about it. William F. Buckley, who I'm a big admirer of, guy who started National Review and writer, commentator.

[Jack Armstrong]

The father of modern conservatism.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, definitely, more or less. He, he reached a point where he just flat out said, he said in an, you can watch the interview on YouTube. I mean he's sitting there in a suit and he said, no, I'm ready to be done. I, I, I'm, I'm ready to exit this world. I just, none of the things I enjoy in life can I do anymore is like really into sailing and exercise and all these different things and I'm just ready to be done. And I thought that's really interesting. How come more people don't come to that conclusion?

[Jack Armstrong]

Or do they just lack the heft of a William F. Buckley and the support of family members to respect their wishes in some cases, you know, the whole everybody wants to die at home and nobody does because the nurses and doctors say oh no, no, no, no, you can't check out now. What the hell, I can't.

[Joe Getty]

And, but if I'm not dying of something, what do I just tell my kids, hey, sneak up behind me at some point? What do you, I don't understand how you exit.

[Jack Armstrong]

You Wander off like an old elephant into the wilderness or the outskirts of town or wherever old elephants go. Nobody's sure.

[Joe Getty]

You want me to sneak up behind you?

[Jack Armstrong]

I should. No. I don't know. All right. Michael. Transition music. It really is. It's. It's one of the best. I feel sufficiently cleansed. So entrepreneurs are flocking to Greenland. Still not America yet, Jack. Dammit. To harvest its most abundant resource in hopes that there are enough people willing to pay a premium for vodka made with glacial meltwater or a cocktail chilled with ultra pure Greenland ice. The ice is allegedly cleaner and denser than almost any ice on earth because it has been compressed in a glacier for a hundred thousand years before falling into the fjord.

[Joe Getty]

My parents did this. I sent them on a cruise up in Alaska and they had drinks on a big boat where it was this. Chunks of the glacier where you can count on it being, you know, 60,000 year old. Pure. The purest water that exists on Earth.

[Jack Armstrong]

Something. It's a mammoth pee in it. You're not fooling me, right?

[Joe Getty]

It's a gimmick more than anything else. I mean you can only. Water can only get so pure that you wouldn't be able to tell.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. And whether science backs up the sales pitch is a subject of debate, as you indicate. As are the environmental trade offs of hauling ice chunks from the Arctic to a nightclub in Dubai.

[Joe Getty]

Whatever.

[Jack Armstrong]

Anyway, so. So this guy who's a green mammoth pee in it.

[Joe Getty]

Get a bartender.

[Jack Armstrong]

So this guy's CEO of this Greenland company. $130 million business development fund. In the past five years, the territory's government has approved 13 licenses to six companies that are currently are planning to harvest glacial meltwater and ice. And they go into some of the details. But diners. Oh, I'm sorry. Once the container arrives in Dubai, as we were discussing Arctic ice, workers carve the chunks into spheres and place them into triangular gift boxes that. With little. A little pair of tongs. The Arctic ice boxes cost $100 for six cubes. This is $100 for six ice balls.

[Joe Getty]

This is like steel cut oats and a number of other things that are just. They're, they're. They're more marketing than real.

[Jack Armstrong]

And then diners at this Dubai restaurant and nightclub in Dubai's financial district can indulge in the gin infused desert whisper cocktail that costs about 48 bucks chilled with Greenland ice cubes. Wow. That's a pretty good cocktail price for a high end joint anyway. Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Is there a spot on Earth more decadent than Dubai?

[Jack Armstrong]

Perhaps not. Probably not wherever Vladimir Putin is hanging out right now.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, but.

[Jack Armstrong]

So here's a French entrepreneur living in Dubai, 28 years old. He takes his 18 year old single malt scotch over Greenland ice, thank you very much. Which runs him out about $218. He said he likes that the ice cubes are free of dirt and bacterial contaminants and melt slowly. Wow.

[Joe Getty]

But I couldn't hate that guy enough.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, please. Therefore, you're spending 218 bucks for a drink. Trust me, regular ice doesn't melt that fast. It's fine. You'll be good. The storytelling is very important for the customers, says the marketing director. When you tell them they contain elements which are 100,000 years old, it's impressive. In other words, it's all a stupid pretension for rich people to show off.

[Joe Getty]

Lots of things are.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, no kidding. So never mind the vital rare earths and minerals and stuff on Greenland. Everybody's making a fortune on the damn ice, selling it to rich people, which is crazy. Speaking of lifestyle stories, Jack. The rise of looks maxing influencers. Toxic beauty for men. Hankering for a chiseled jawline. A male tick tock influencer strikes his cheekbones with a hammer, highlighting the risk. The rise of looks masking Max mewing.

[Joe Getty]

Are you familiar with.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yes, we've talked about this before.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, my, my, my, my kids mentioned this a couple years ago. Is big on the playground. Kids on the playground talking about their jawlines. That's healthy for a society.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh my Lord. At what age?

[Joe Getty]

I don't know, fourth grade.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, ever, Ever. This is why William F. Buckley embraced death. He's like, I've had enough. Anyway, it's an online trend pushing unproven, sometimes dangerous techniques to boost sexual appeal. Look. Looks maxing influencers, part of an online ecosphere dubbed the manosphere, have surged in popularity. Blah, blah, blah, capitaliz the insecurities of young men to boost their physical attractiveness to women. Well, at least people are hooking up. Or have an interest in it. In posts across TikTok, Instagram and YouTube, they promote pseudo scientific methods to achieve everything from pouty lips to chin extensions and almond shaped hunter eyes, as they're called.

[Joe Getty]

Okay, I kind of guess.

[Jack Armstrong]

Are you sure you're hooking up with women?

[Joe Getty]

I get what a chin extension could be. Or a variety of things. How do you change your eye shape?

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, that's, that's the thing. A lot of stuff doesn't work at all.

[Joe Getty]

How are you changing your eye shape? I have be little beady little criminal Eyes that nobody trusts. I would love it if I had big Disney eyes, but I don't.

[Jack Armstrong]

I. And I have made my lips pouty by pouting a lot. So. And of course, these guys monetize their popularity by endorsing a range of consumer products and get money giving young men terrible, terrible advice.

[Joe Getty]

Doesn't matter anyway.

[Jack Armstrong]

These influencers advocate taking steroids, undergoing plastic surgery, and even leg lengthening procedures to become more attractive.

[Joe Getty]

Okay, here's. Here's a little a hint for me. Just because I. I know people and I'm single. I know people in the single world talking about what it's like to be single in the modern world. Here's. Women aren't worried about your shin length or the mewing of your jawline or your poutyness of your lips or a number of other things. They want a guy who doesn't play video games all the time and can keep an erection, has a job.

[Jack Armstrong]

Do those things make a living? Yes. Have those three things.

[Joe Getty]

You don't need to worry about your jawline.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yes. Job interactions. Right. It's all you need, son. Jack, why don't you become one of these. What do they call them? I Can't Even looks. Maxing influencers. Wow. Except you'll be a job. An erection maxing influencer. And yes, they get into mewing, an unproven technique involving pressing the tongue into the roof of the mouth for improving jaw and facial structure. It doesn't work. And bone smashing, known as the hammer technique, where you hit your cheeks with the sharp edge of a hammer to try to grow out your bones. Yeah. You can end up with. If it work, if it does anything, you're gonna have a lumpy face. You're not gonna look like, you know, Chris Hemsworth. You're gonna look like you got hit in the head with a hammer. Because you did.

[Joe Getty]

You know, I kind of feel like if you do this, man, there's a little Darwin thing going on there, even for a young person.

[Jack Armstrong]

Nah, I get.

[Joe Getty]

Well, if you're hitting yourself in the head with a hammer, I mean, wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

But this gets stuff. Well, yeah, you're right. You're right. I mean, it's not like you knock yourself unconscious. But what's, what's tough for us is that in our pre adolescence and adolescence, we didn't have the most ridiculous, corrosive, poisonous ideas in the world at the touch of our fingers.

[Joe Getty]

Right.

[Jack Armstrong]

I mean, like all the time. My son and other lunatics who say, yes. What he said is an excellent idea in a way you would never run into in real life.

[Joe Getty]

I don't know exactly what my my high schooler was doing, but he was in the backyard the other day with his friends. They were shirtless with big buckets of water doing something that was a tick tock challenge. I don't even know what it was.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow.

[Joe Getty]

But yeah, it happens. At least they weren't hitting themselves in the face with hammers. Stop the hammering.

[Jack Armstrong]

Final note then. We really need to take a break. Is that a lot of the incel communities, the involuntarily celibate are turning into looks maxing because they're thinking, okay, get laid. I've been blaming and hating women. What if I hit myself in the face with a hammer? Then I'll look like Chris Hemsworth and I'll get lots of chicks. So because the marketing wasn't working so much on the incel stuff anymore, the money grubbing disgust that this actually is at its root has turned into this. Wow. Meet a nice girl, treat her well, fellas, get a job, maintain your erection. It'll go great. Trust me. I wouldn't lie to you, Armstrong and Getty.

[Unknown Speaker (Dutch Advertisement)]

Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra precious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 24,7 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free. With Dutch, you'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care.

[Joe Getty]

At the Philadelphia Zoo.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's their big debut.

[Joe Getty]

For the first time the public able to see four critically endangered western Santa Cruz Galapagos tortoise hatchlings. Little baby turtles less than 50 are known to exist in America. The zoo telling us they are proud to protect the endangered population and proud of that 97 year old mom appropriately named Mommy. She is our oldest and longest tenured resident, estimated hatching in 1928 and has been here since 1932. The zoo telling us the babies are.

[Jack Armstrong]

Thriving, exploring their new habitat. You know, I could do basic mathematics, but it hadn't occurred to me that a 97 year old turtle came on the scene when Hoover was still doing the Charleston. Great Scott.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, but does that turtle realize she she's going to be 118 when they graduate high school?

[Jack Armstrong]

Hey, I tell you what, if those tortoises are from turtles, whatever they are from Western Santa Cruz. I can promise you this. They're stoned.

[Joe Getty]

Did you know John Mulaney's got a new, like, talk show on Netflix he's doing every week, like with a crowd and a guest. It's like any of those late night talk shows. Anyway, I saw the beginning of the one from Sunday night and he said, tough week this week for the show. The. It's kind of a Saturday Night Live type show. He said the whole premise was, gosh, it's great. The Pope's still alive. And we had to rewrite the whole script. But the evening news keeps leading with the Pope's death. I don't know how many days that's gonna last. Here's a little from ABC News last night.

[Jack Armstrong]

I feel like it's someone from my. For my family. And I don't know why, because I, I really don't know him a lot. You understand it. I don't know why.

[Joe Getty]

How did you feel when you in front of him? So blessed. Really. So blessed and so happy.

[Jack Armstrong]

Extremely emotional. Everything stops.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

When you guys in front of him.

[Joe Getty]

Some of the many people standing in line for hours to walk by the body of the, the dead Pope.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't get it at all.

[Joe Getty]

I'm pro religion. I'm pro Catholic church. I'm pro Christianity, as you can get and all that.

[Jack Armstrong]

The Bible.

[Joe Getty]

I don't understand the investing in a. The, the Pope. This. I just, you know, fine. I'm not, I don't know. I guess I am being critical by bringing this up, but.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I don't have time to fully explain my position on this, so for once in my life, I'll show a little restraint and not even start.

[Joe Getty]

I mean, I'm shocked that the evening news, full of atheists and people that dislike religion more than they like it, leading with that story every single night.

[Jack Armstrong]

I think they have a very old audience, so it's more likely to be A, religious and B, Catholic.

[Joe Getty]

Richard Engel of NBC News in Iran. Before we bomb the bejesus out of it, talking about the current state of Iranian culture, which is kind of interesting. Among other things on the way. Stay here.

[Jack Armstrong]

Armstrong and Getty.

[Unknown Speaker (Dutch Advertisement)]

Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra precious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 24. 7 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many Ailments and shipping is always free with Dutch. You'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care.

[Joe Getty]

I realize that I for one like geopolitics and war and peace more than the average bear. So I can spend a lot of time thinking and talking about it as opposed to, like, I don't know, a lot of your domestic economic stuff. I have no interest in it.

[Jack Armstrong]

The stuff that matters. You're a global elitist. Are you in the Bilderberg Group?

[Joe Getty]

I might be. But everybody's going to be talking about Iran here soon when we bomb the crap out of it, which I think is going to happen. I think we and Israel. I didn't read that whole New York Times story from last weekend till this weekend. That was the one where either on purpose or not, some source inside the Pentagon or the White House let the New York Times know the entire plan for attacking Iran, which included Israeli commandos going in and getting into the tunnels. And I mean, I mean that's not a been a, that was gonna be a serious, and still might be a serious invasion of a major country.

[Jack Armstrong]

Interesting.

[Joe Getty]

Israel sending commandos in and, you know, fighting in the tunnels to try to get to the nuclear bomb making sites and US bombing and everything like that. Anyway, Iran's going to be top of mind when that happens. That's one of the reasons Richard Engel of NBC News is there. Here's what he had to say yesterday.

[Richard Engel]

The Iranians, both on the governmental level and on a popular level, are taking these talks extraordinarily seriously. In the US they might not be getting a lot of attention. People are talking about Ukraine, the economy, the executive orders that President Trump is giving. But here, the only conversation that people are having is focused on these talks. People hope that they will be successful. People hope that they will end sanctions. And a lot of people are worried that if they fail that there could be some sort of military action taken against Iran by Israel. By Israel and the United States together.

[Joe Getty]

Could be. There absolutely will be. And you know, I didn't finish my thought. So that story that was in the New York Times, some people are, you know, you got to find the leaker and, you know, have them shot for treason or whatever. It's quite possible that the Trump people gave that to the New York Times on purpose to let Iran know. This is how serious we are. Israel's putting ground troops into Iran. That's how serious we are about this whole thing. That's what you're going to be dealing With. So you might want to get pretty.

[Jack Armstrong]

Serious about the possibility. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Joe Getty]

And man, that would be.

[Jack Armstrong]

That would be.

[Joe Getty]

I mean, Israel's been around since, what, 49 or whatever. And there have been a number of major wars that movies. I mean, this would be right up there. I mean, in terms of a big deal. They're putting ground troops in Iran. Holy crap. Anyway, and once again, isn't it nice to live in the United States where we're ignoring this story? Because nobody's gonna bomb you today in Iran, it's all the talk, as Richard Engel just said, because there's a chance the most sophisticated planes in the world with the most sophisticated bonds on Earth start invading their city any day now.

[Jack Armstrong]

Some of the most fearsome. Some bitches on Earth drop out of the sky at night and are ooching about in your cities and certainly your nuclear facilities. Yeah. We also have the luxury of not being directly threatened by Iran getting the bomb in a way that Israel, our good old bud, absolutely is.

[Joe Getty]

Good point. Here's more. Richard Engel.

[Richard Engel]

Just the fact that I am here is part of that initiative the government is trying to open up. We've been given quite extraordinary access to government officials. I was at the Iranian Parliament the other day talking to a ranking member of their National Security Committee. We've been able to walk around the streets without any kind of minders or arrest escorts. A lot is happening here. There is a lot of change happening inside Iran that. That doesn't get out.

[Joe Getty]

So they happily welcome Richard Engel into. I assume he's in Tehran so he can travel around with no minders or anything like that. No, they want a very sympathetic face on the Iranian people. As you're about to hear here, a.

[Richard Engel]

Lot of the stereotypes people have about the Iranian people. They're not what you, what you, you, what you, what you see when you on the streets here. There is a sophisticated culture that is very. That very much wants to engage with the world. You go to a coffee shop in Tehran and not just in the wealthy areas, but anywhere in this city. And in many places, it looks like you could be in a coffee shop in New York City or any part of Western Europe. The problem is because of the sanctions, because of the impositions imposed on Iran, they are almost cut off from the world.

[Joe Getty]

Well, that's nice.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's an interesting way to describe how we got to the point that they're cut off from the world. Didn't have anything to do with the madman mullahs and the Islamic supremacists and the Revolutionary Guard know it was the, the west that did that.

[Joe Getty]

Well, right. And hey, Richard Engle, while, you know, I feel bad for the average Iranian citizen who probably doesn't like the government any more than I do.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, guaranteed.

[Joe Getty]

So the fact that they got modern New York style coffee shops, we should let them get a nuclear weapon. I mean, because at the end of the day it's about them getting a.

[Jack Armstrong]

Nuclear weapon and whether obliterating the Jews. Yes, exactly. And after that the Christians. Yes, but they do have nice coffee shops. He makes a good point.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, it sucks. You live in Tehran and you're some 19 year old woman who hates the fact that the government makes you wear a headscarf and you, you'd kill the mullahs with your bare hands if you had the chance yourself.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right.

[Joe Getty]

It would suck for you to get caught in a, you know, a bomb.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know, this is, you know, the, the mullahs are nuts, but they're not stupid. Likewise the Revolutionary Guard. It's really interesting to me. I've been unaware of the whole, wait, we're open, we're western, we have coffee shops. Dick Engel, you walk around anywhere you want. Ask anybody you want anything. What are you talking about? A giant attack with bombs and commandos. Please have a cup of our excellent coffee. They are extremely weak. Y'all have probably heard this before. I'm not trying to, you know, repeat what you've heard or insult your intelligence, but Israel haven't taken out Iran's air defenses fairly recently and, and exposed them even at that moment as being much, much weaker than anybody thought. And at this point they infant in a bassinet in terms of their self defense capabilities, certainly against more sophisticated attacks. So apparently they're going full on, let's be buddies. I, I've heard it on the right that no, Trump is trying to sign us up for like Obama's Iranian Agreement 2.0. But I, you know, I don't worship Trump as God, but I don't think he's that bad a deal maker either. He's got to understand how weak they are and, and what an opportune moment this is to strike. Whether, you know, physically kinetically strike or strike is in. All right, here's the deal.

[Joe Getty]

You're being offered those war plans, and these were war plans that were put out in the New York Times weekend before last. It included which kinds of planes are going to launch from which base at which moment and in which order. I mean, it was quite detailed.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, that's what planners do.

[Joe Getty]

But. Well, I understand why the planners have it, but who gave that to the New York Times? For what reason? Somebody who doesn't want this attack to happen.

[Jack Armstrong]

I mean, your theory better.

[Joe Getty]

Well, I, I hope it's. I hope it's my original theory that it's that the Trump administration letting Rand know, hey, this is how serious we are. This is, These are the details of the plans we've got ready to go. And we. If it's somebody who released that stuff to try to stop it, you're telling them exactly which planes where take off when. I mean, that is treasonous.

[Jack Armstrong]

I would agree. Those were. Help me understand. Those were US Plans, Israeli plans or a combination.

[Joe Getty]

Combination. Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that is treasonous. Although the troops aren't actually in the field, but still like them whisked off to a secret prison for a while. Well, is Dick Cheney still in business?

[Joe Getty]

I mean, the fact that. That Iran can now plan for Israeli commandos. Right.

[Jack Armstrong]

There's nothing they can do about the air attacks as we're discussing seconds ago. But yeah, the. Yeah. Planning for the specifics of the attack. Yeah, that's. That's a very bad leak on the other side. If it was an actual, like, hostile leak.

[Joe Getty]

The other side of it for some of you. And I don't know who leaked this to Tucker, but Tucker Carlson claims he's got the Pentagon's own numbers on what the reaction could be in an include thousands dead in attacks on our military basis around the Middle east and that sort of thing. I mean, this is. I keep saying this. I don't, I don't, I don't. I don't feel like people feel this way. This would be the biggest thing we've done militarily since shock and awe March 2003, when we attacked Iraq with a full army. And it might not necessarily go as smoothly either.

[Jack Armstrong]

No. No. Well, yeah. Having lived through a number of episodes from my childhood watching Vietnam through Iraq and Afghanistan. Yeah. Nothing goes as planned. On the other hand, the idea that thousands of our troops would die, I'm not buying that.

[Joe Getty]

No. I'm guessing that's the. It's a report that the Pentagon puts together with like the worst case scenario.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Worst case scenario.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. Yeah. Boy, the Charm offensive is interesting. I wonder what's next with this. This is easily a big enough topic that it ought to be dominating the national discussion. But it's one of like 11. Right.

[Joe Getty]

I was just. Funny, I was just reading Mark Halpern's newsletter for today. Just the Number of giant stories and which directions they could go, this one being one of them. But the tariff thing, and I've solved it.

[Jack Armstrong]

You permit Iran to have the bomb, but you put 145 tariff on it.

[Joe Getty]

Right?

[Jack Armstrong]

So they can't afford to send it.

[Joe Getty]

To us or they have bomb. If there's no dei, we'll give them the funding.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know.

[Joe Getty]

It's all very complicated. We'll finish strong.

[Jack Armstrong]

Next, Armstrong and Getty.

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[Joe Getty]

I just saw this in the LA Times. The Department of Homeland Security accidentally sent out notices that said it's time for you to leave to US citizens, which would have been funny if I got that alert on my phone. This is the federal government. It's time for you to leave.

[Jack Armstrong]

You know what?

[Joe Getty]

What?

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay, where am I going?

[Joe Getty]

Penalty for not.

[Jack Armstrong]

You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here, folks.

[Joe Getty]

It's time for you to leave. I, I've been told that before, as you all know, so.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, I'm ready to self deport. Just, just name the time. Oh, you know what I didn't get to today, we're actually talking about colleges and college funding and the Trump administration wrestling with Harvard. Who? Oh, by the way, I forgot. You know that Matt Taibbi piece we were talking about yesterday that was so well written. I hadn't gotten to the end because it was pretty long, but he, he points out in one part that people have this idea of Harvard as being, you know, just packed with these super geniuses, the, the best of the best. He said, yeah, there are some real geniuses there. There are also lots and lots of morons, rich morons and legacy morons and whatever.

[Joe Getty]

Did he go to Harvard?

[Jack Armstrong]

No, no, he did not.

[Joe Getty]

We asked somebody about that once and they told us that. And I remember it was, Was it Lonnie Chen? He went to Harvard. It might have been Lonnie. I, I shouldn't put words in his mouth. He might not like that. But somebody we know who went to Harvard said, yeah, you'd be surprised. You're in classes with lots of people that are just very, very average.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, yeah, we have heard that. So here's the end of what he wrote. Were you about to jump into something? I don't mean to hijack it.

[Joe Getty]

I was not.

[Jack Armstrong]

Because we had a loose plan. But for decades the US has been transforming into a public private blob of intertwined bureaucratic unaccountability. The phenomenon is observable in every direction, from finance sector insulated by an implied bailout to subsidized mass dysfunction in trade, healthcare, national security and other sectors. The problem has been described by corporate lobbyists fed up with big government and by left leaning writers like Chris Hedges, whose Death of the Liberal Class chronicle the dangers of liberalizing NGOs. That's non governmental organizations losing independence as they're swallowed into the larger hold. Even Democratic speechwriters have conceded of late that it's become difficult to defend the Gordian knot that American society has become. Here's his conclusion about Harvard. Harvard is the ultimate example of an institution that's become more bureaucracy than university, where subsidies have reduced once mighty brains to a mush of arrogant entitlement. It could use some time in the wilderness. Other schools like Columbia could too, if they find they can still thrive in the free market as censorious imbecilic monocultures. Good for not. Maybe they'll rediscover the virtues of academic inquiry. Trying to force that epiphany by presidential fatwa seems like a bad idea. Could we be lucky enough to see academia walk the plank voluntarily?

[Joe Getty]

Wow. I was listening to a podcast.

[Jack Armstrong]

Serious imbecilic monocultures. That's what they are.

[Joe Getty]

I'm always saying that. I was listening to a podcast the other day and they were having the conversation of would you want your kid to go to Harvard? And almost everybody was a yes. But the reason for the yes was the networking, the contacts you make. None of it was the education.

[Jack Armstrong]

I mean, the alumni networks are huge.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, if, if mostly you want your kid to go to an Ivy League school because of the kind of people you hang around, that's a little too England for me. I'm reading a lot about rereading stuff about the spy network and all that sort of stuff in England, but all of that was based on the fact that they have such a class system in England. We don't want that in the United States.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I. I know. I've got to admit, if I see somebody who's a fellow Illinois grad, I have this small bit of affection for them, which is. Doesn't make any sense whatsoever. We had some common experiences, but you probably don't.

[Joe Getty]

I, I don't know. But I don't think you probably have any of the. I think a lot of the Harvard people. It's not just what you described. It's a. You're part of us, the better people. The, the higher class of this and that. That.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yes. And we will look out for each other. Whether they, you know, that's like 100% of why they do it or 20% of it. There's absolutely. That elitists were better than everybody thing. But they're also, because they're so full of themselves, they see a fellow Harvard grad or whatever, they want to hire them and help them and do something for them to reaffirm that tribal affiliation. My point is, my tribal affiliation is it exists, but it's weak. I mean, I understand how silly is it. It is even as I feel it. But if you're like steeped in the whole Harvard Crimson thing, you've got a super powerful tribal affiliation impulse. And, and that's good if you're a kid trying to get a first gig.

[Joe Getty]

For instance.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, there's Jack and there's Joe, and it's time to close with the help of Katie Green and Michelangelo. Gabby the Clowns. They're like family and they're on a race video. So let's hear their final thoughts before they have to go. Yeah. You got a puppy in your van. I know. Oh, my God.

[Joe Getty]

That was frightening. Here's your host for final thoughts, Joe Getty.

[Jack Armstrong]

Let's get a final thought from everybody on the crew to wrap up the day. There is our technical director, Michelangelo. Michael, talk to us.

[Joe Getty]

Easy message today. Happy birthday to my wonderful wife, if she's listening. And Yeah, I think McDonald's has a new sandwich.

[Jack Armstrong]

And so maybe, you know, you might be getting that. This. You might be getting that. Wow. Rest in peace, Michael. Disturbing. Yeah. Rest in peace. Katie Greener, esteemed newswoman, has a final thought. Katie? Well, I have a busy, very busy.

[Joe Getty]

Day ahead of me today. I was just notified that I owe.

[Jack Armstrong]

Bridge toll and this notification came in.

[Joe Getty]

From a Hotmail email address.

[Jack Armstrong]

So gonna have to handle that. State of Oregon's using Hotmail now or whatever. Jack, a final thought for us.

[Joe Getty]

For some reason, I was thrown by Michael birthday to his wife. She might be listening.

[Jack Armstrong]

While you're thinking, speaking of food, my final thought. I've been observing some of the construction crews working on our remodel project and some of the fellows who are Mexican, Guatemalan, whatever they are. Instead of like bringing packaged lunch or going out to McDonald's or whatever, they've set up with a pro campaign like Camp Heater thing their own taqueria. They're eating fresh made hot tortilla tacos for lunch together in the shade. It looks fantastic. Why don't we gringos do that? Instead of bring the grill, you bring the burgers.

[Joe Getty]

Not a bag of Doritos and a Red Bull.

[Jack Armstrong]

Or yeah, some crap you got out of the freezer. Case of the 7 11, right? That's cool to kill you Armstrong and.

[Joe Getty]

Getty wrapping up another grueling four hour workday.

[Jack Armstrong]

So many people to thank, so little time. Go To Armstrong and getty.com Many pleasures await you there, including the why did.

[Joe Getty]

You say it like that?

[Jack Armstrong]

I sicken myself. Including hot links I'm strong and getty.com see you tomorrow.

[Joe Getty]

God Bless America.

[Jack Armstrong]

We've really tried to understand things from.

[Joe Getty]

The perspective of Armstrong and Getty.

[Richard Engel]

We're in fear territory right now.

[Jack Armstrong]

How in the hell are we sitting.

[Richard Engel]

By and allowing this to happen?

[Jack Armstrong]

As that great Chicagoan Ferris Bueller once noted, poor all.

[Joe Getty]

No, you're not going to hear much.

[Richard Engel]

About that on corporate television.

[Jack Armstrong]

By the way, eat more beans is good for you. Make America healthy again and flatulent. But that's the key with beans. Ease into it. Anyway, that's the key with beans. Bye bye Armstrong and Getty.

[Unknown Speaker (Dutch Advertisement)]

Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra precious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 24. 7 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free with Dutch. You'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care.