A Very Unique Unicorn

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: "A Very Unique Unicorn"

Date: July 22, 2026
Hosts: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty

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Episode Overview

This episode offers Armstrong and Getty's signature blend of wit, sharp critique, and cultural commentary, focusing on recent California political controversies, the tenets of democratic socialism, and a humorous look back at vintage commercials. With biting humor and exasperation, they interrogate the Newsom family's influence in California, dissect the promises of the Democratic Socialists of America (DSA), and lighten the load with satirical explorations of the past.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Guinness World Record Ridicule

• (02:19) Starts with a comedic take on bizarre Guinness World Records, notably a German man popping 60 balloons with a plunger.
  • Jack (02:19): “A German man recently broke the Guinness World record by popping 60 balloons in 30 seconds using a plunger… It's of no interest to anyone.”
  • Spirals into mockery of what constitutes a record and how trivial they can be.

2. Critique of DSA (Democratic Socialists of America) and Their Website

• (02:53; 15:16-22:14)
  • Jack expresses incredulity at the content found on the DSA's website, suggesting it veers into self-parody.
  • Jack (02:53): "I can't get enough of the crazy S that's on the DSA website. I can't believe it's real."
  • Reads outlandish promises supposedly from the DSA, like free housing, no debt, and laughable utopian claims.
  • Jack (21:13): “You have no debt. You don't need health insurance, you don't pay a mortgage or have a landlord because comfortable housing is a human right… Food, education, energy, medicine and transportation aren't for profit businesses.”
  • The hosts question practicality, mock the notion that people will work hard for the "common good" if everything is guaranteed.

3. California Political Scandal: Newsom, Siebel Newsom & No-Bid Diaper Contracts

• (03:27-14:49)
  • Discussion on Jennifer Siebel Newsom’s documentaries allegedly pushing fringe gender and sex ideas in schools, including activities that force children to disclose their sexuality or privilege.
  • Joe (04:40): "But the stuff that they're actually teaching from kindergarteners on is just... It's so bad."
  • The show examines the controversy, describing questionable educational content and the outrage of parents.
  • Details the no-bid diaper contract scandal involving Governor Gavin Newsom and the charity "Baby2Baby," connected to his wife.
  • Joe (10:17): "But as it happens, the governor uses a slightly more flexible definition of competitive than the rest of the English speaking world..."
  • The hosts highlight the process being a non-competitive bid, ties to the Newsom family, and how budget loopholes allowed $6.2 million in contracts.
  • Jack (13:28): "I'm despondent about this. The fact that you can do practically anything you want and nobody… It's very difficult for people to pay attention."

4. California Budget Transparency (or Lack Thereof)

• (14:01-14:49)
  • Over $1 billion in appropriations exempted from oversight and competitive bidding.
  • Joe (14:01): “That is the very definition of lawlessness. Wow, that is something.”
  • Jack expresses discouragement about accountability in politics, while Joe sees a slim chance for change in upcoming elections.

5. Vintage Commercials – Societal Norms and Sexism

• (26:15-36:29)
  • The hosts play and deconstruct 1960s-70s commercials, mocking the blatant sexism and outdated gender roles.
  • Jack (27:27): “I like calling her a woman.”
  • Examples include coffee ads belittling wives for bad coffee, and a Tab soft drink ad pushing women to stay "in his mind" by keeping a good shape.
  • They compare these with modern critiques of toxic masculinity and reflect on how such ads seemed unremarkable at the time.
  • Joe (31:23): "With all due disrespect to the idiotic toxic masculinity stuff you get from Marxists..."

6. Foreign Affairs: Iran and U.S. Policy

• (40:13-43:38)
  • Quick recap of escalating tensions in the Strait of Hormuz, with a clip of Sen. Marco Rubio and a mention of a bold Trump post threatening to bomb Iran’s infrastructure for any attack on shipping.
  • Jack (41:16): "We're gonna bomb the power plants and bridges in Tehran, are we?"
  • Hosts express skepticism about both the practicality and likelihood of following through.

7. Speculation over Iranian Leadership ("Weirdbeard Jr.")

• (43:39-43:57)
  • Banter over the unconfirmed death of Iran’s Supreme Leader, likening public appearances to the film Weekend at Bernie's.

8. ICC, NYC Mayor & Netanyahu

• (44:23-45:38)
  • Reaction to New York City’s mayor’s grandstanding over potentially arresting Israeli PM Netanyahu if he visits the UN.
  • Legal expert debunks the mayor’s ability to arrest foreign heads of state.
  • Jack (45:38): “He doesn't think he could have arrested Benjamin Netanyahu… He got the message out to all the young idiots or anti Semites in the country that he's their leader.”

9. Show Wrap-Up and Final Thoughts

• (46:45-47:47)
  • Crew discusses the humor of old ads (Flintstones promoting cigarettes), Tiger Woods’ son, and mock-predicts his future.
  • Joe lambasts Smithsonian leadership as "a Marxist liar," urging listeners to check out past segments for more.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the DSA’s fantasy platform:
  • Jack (21:13): “You don't need health insurance, you don't pay a mortgage or have a landlord because comfortable housing is a human right. Your retirement is publicly funded. Food, education, energy, medicine and transportation aren't for profit businesses. They're common goods and utilities. Paid for by who, you morons?”
• On the “privilege walk” in schools:
  • Joe (06:30): “So if you’re a straight white male who grew up in an intact family… you’d be alone at the very front of the room and you’re supposed to feel bad about that, I guess.”
  • Jack (07:09): “F you people. Screw you people. You're evil. You're evil. Evil people.”
• On California “free diapers” scandal:
  • Joe (10:17): "The governor uses a slightly more flexible definition of competitive than the rest of the English-speaking world..."
• On 1960s sexism in old ads:
  • Jack (27:27): “I like calling her a woman. ...Make some decent coffee, woman.”
  • Joe (32:40): “And by the way, your shape ain't so hot either. Maybe try a Tab.”
• Banter about Iranian leadership:
  • Joe (43:47): “So it’s kind of Ramaton with Bernie. I was working on that for longer than I'm proud of.”
• On Mayor Adams’ legal bluster:
  • Legal Expert (44:59): “Absolutely not. It is utterly ridiculous for the Mayor of New York City to even suggest that he might have the authority to order the arrest of Benjamin Netanyahu... So let me save them some time. You do not have the authority to do this.”

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Trivial Guinness Record & DSA Website Banter: 02:19–03:27
• California Gender Ed/DSA Critique: 03:27–07:51 (Privilege Walk), 15:16–22:14
• Newsom Documentary & Diaper Scandal: 03:27–14:49
• Budget Exemptions & Lawlessness: 14:01–14:49
• Vintage Commercials Segment: 26:15–36:29
• Iran–U.S. Tensions, Trump’s Threat: 40:13–42:38
• Iranian Leader Speculation: 43:39–43:57
• NYC Mayor vs. Netanyahu (ICC): 44:23–45:38
• Show Wrap-Up & Final Thoughts: 46:45–47:47

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Tone and Language

• Irreverent, sarcastic, and outraged, with moments of genuine exasperation at current political events. Regularly veers into satire and parody, especially when discussing fringe ideology, corruption, or dated pop culture.

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Useful for Listeners Who Missed It

This episode shines a spotlight on current California controversies, their national relevance, and the hosts’ libertarian skepticism of political institutions and utopian schemes. Listeners get equal parts humor and pointed criticism, plus a bonus comedic trip down advertising history’s memory lane.

If you want a fast-moving, pointedly funny analysis of the week’s big stories—with enough scathing commentary and throwback nonsense to entertain and provoke—this hour is a must-listen.

Transcript

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[Jack Armstrong]

Broadcasting live from the Abraham Lincoln Radio

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Studio at the George Washington Broadcast Center, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty.

[Joe Getty]

Armstrong and Getty. And now here's Armstrong, strong and giddy. A German man recently broke the Guinness

[Jack Armstrong]

World record by popping 60 balloons in 30 seconds using a plunger, said his wife. So the toilet is still clogged? Yes, but they broke a record. Yeah, there is some good news along with the bad. Whoever said last week that they got to end the Guinness Book of World Records? I mean, how many balloons can you pop with a plunger?

[Commercial Actor]

That's.

[Joe Getty]

Stop it.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's of no interest to anyone. It's not even.

[Joe Getty]

How about a shovel?

[Jack Armstrong]

How about a golf club? A pool cue, whatever. I can't get enough of the crazy. I wish I could use the S word. I can't get enough of the crazy S that's on the DSA website. I can't believe it's real. I almost feel like it's a Andy Warhol, Andy Kaufman type bit. It's like self parody to see how many people would fall for can't be real. But I've got more from the DSA website coming up at some point today or tomorrow.

[Joe Getty]

To me, the subhead the subtitle is if you're a student of human beings, of politics, of societies, it's really helpful to know how crazy humans can be. You've got to reckon with it. Anyway, speaking of craziness, a couple of Gav Newsom Related stories First of all, the Free Beacon with a great piece on the documentaries quote unquote produced by California's first partner Jennifer Siebel Newsom that have that promote fringe views on sex and gender. According to everybody for all of history until the woke apocalypse that have been shown to 2 1/2 million K through 12 students with an accompanying lesson plan that forces teens to publicly disclose their sexual orientation to their peers and identify which of their classmates violate gender norms and maybe labeled as. I'm not sure I can say all these words. Well I can. Fags, pussies and nasty bull butches. These lavishly produced documentaries that then are sold to school systems at high levels of profit, especially in California.

[Jack Armstrong]

Like you have the option as a public school system to say no to the Governor's wife documentary.

[Joe Getty]

Right? She's called a quote influential thought leader on gender equality. According to the state of California's official website. She's accused the press of fighting a war on women. Is known for meandering lectures on toxic toxic masculinity. She told convicts at San Quentin that she related to them because at age six she accidentally killed her eight year old sister with a golf cart. Anyway. And she and her husband are now facing a federal criminal probe which is focusing in part on Siebel Newsom's taxes, her charities and her for profit doc documentary company. All of which are interwoven in a complex skein. That excellent yarn reference there that up till now is largely. Or is it skein? I think it's skein. My wife does this.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know these words anyway that

[Joe Getty]

up until now is largely evaded serious public scrutiny. But the stuff that they're actually teaching from kindergarteners on is just. It's so bad. Especially because the kids can't read or write or do basic math. The Privilege walk activity is one prominent one. High school students are directed to line up shoulder to shoulder and take forward or backward steps corresponding to a series of prompts, one of which reads step forward if you identify as straight. LGBTQ minus plus over the power of three, students are to remain in place. The instruction stresses that the exercise works best if students and participants take large steps, so the differences are obvious. When the students are finished positioning themselves, they are instructed to look at who is around them and reflect on how their personal privilege stacks against their peers.

[Jack Armstrong]

So if you're a straight white male who grew up in an intact family or whatever they would be, you'd be alone at the very front of the room and you're supposed to feel bad about that, I guess.

[Joe Getty]

And you would be looked at with real resentment and hate and that would be encouraged. Yeah. And one of the activities, as they said earlier, is you are supposed to self identify as what your sexuality is, you know, blah, blah, blah, all this stuff and then talk about all the words you might be called and the rest of it and God, how do you have.

[Jack Armstrong]

How do you.

[Joe Getty]

First graders.

[Jack Armstrong]

I know. It's easier said than done. How do you let your kid go to a school where they do that? F you people. Screw you people. You're evil. You're evil. Evil people. Yes.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

God. Doing that to little kids and convincing the. Convincing the one kid he should feel bad about something that he didn't do anything wrong. This is just who I am and the family I grew up with. So I'm up here in front and I'm supposed to feel bad about this somehow for some reason, which they would because they're little kids and they don't know any better. And then the kids in the back, now you're convincing them you can't get ahead because you got all these things against them, which is also evil. You people are evil. I hate you so much.

[Joe Getty]

Controversy erupted not long after Newsom's Department of Education gave its stamp of approval to the first partners documentaries in 2019, when a public junior high school classroom of 11 and 12 year olds in the Central Valley of California screened the mass you live in which presents traditional masculinity is harmful to young boys. One California father said his 12 year old daughter was traumatized after seeing the film at school, which contained footage of young men searching for graphic and violent pornography. Quote from the Modesto B. Viewers also briefly see a clear picture of sexual bondage and acts of violence against nude or thinly dressed young women. Said the father is the worst thing my daughter has been exposed to. When I send her to school, I don't want her to see porn. That's what this is. And again, they're teaching little, little kids to question whether they're a boy or a girl and whether they should get powerful hormones or surgeries. More on that another time. Got to get to this. This is from. What is the name of this website? It's got a funny name. Coffee and Covid. It's the name of the site, but they're writing about the investigation, the political noose tightening around California's oleaginous. That means oily Governor Hairdo and his empire of fraud.

[Jack Armstrong]

Governor Hairdo.

[Joe Getty]

On Saturday, CBS reported Newsom's competitive bid diaper deal wasn't California's budget includes dozens of similar no bid exemptions. It's, as they say, a latest example of progressive wordplay, NGO grifting and poopy diapers gone horribly wrong. So Jack, you brought us the story that that Governor Newsom announced that the state of California was going to give free, quote unquote diaper diapers to all people who have babies.

[Jack Armstrong]

Free diapers for newborns. And then the details are if you're under a certain income, other people buy you diapers but they have a system for it in which the diapers cost way more than if we taxpayers just went to Costco and bought them.

[Joe Getty]

Right, Exactly. So it started back in May when Governor Hare gel triumphantly announced a first in the nation program to provide free note, not free taxpayer funded California co branded diapers to every new parent. During the grand announcement, Newsom proudly claimed proclaimed that the partnership with the totally unrelated and unconflicted LA based charity baby 2 baby which is connected to his wife Jennifer.

[Jack Armstrong]

No way. Get out of here. What a coincidence.

[Joe Getty]

He claimed that I quote went through a competitive bidding process. He spoke those words out loud into a microphone where people could hear him. But as it happens, the governor uses a slightly more flexible definition of competitive than the rest of the English speaking world. According to the state's own official contract database, the $6.2 million deal with Baby Da Baby was classified as, wait for it, non competitively bid all caps in the original. That's right. The state literally stamped non competitively bid right next to the $6.2 million price tag for a no bid contract. Newsom claimed, quote went through a bidding process when pressed by CBS to explain how a non competitively Bid contract could possibly be described as competitive. The government spokeslady offered an explanation that would make George Orwell weep. Progressive wordplay. The spokesperson claimed the term competitive referred to the competitive nature of the stakes. No bid. Request for information.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, you know, I've said this before and I know this angers some of you. I think Gavin Newsom has correctly figured out where we are. Trump does it. Gavin does it. You can just say whatever you want. And with our the way the news works now and the way people get information, nobody's ever gonna hear the details.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, I just don't. Well, I think I'm for the grace of God. Yeah, For a minute back then I used to call him lunkhead Gavin Newsom. But that's absolutely not true. He's very smart guy, very calculated.

[Jack Armstrong]

I think he's figured out the moment we're in, which is true. You can say this stuff. The people that support you aren't going to hear the detailed pushback. And the people that are on whatever sources will hear the detailed pushback. They didn't like you anyway. But they probably won't hear it at all because most people aren't paying attention to anything.

[Joe Getty]

So according to cbs, the massive state budget contained a single provision exempting the diaper contracts from competitive bidding laws, from public advertising requirements, and even from the quote, review or approval of any division of the Department of General Services, which is the state's watchdog agency, because of course it did it. Exactly. It exempted this maneuver from any scrutiny in the law. No bid required. No watchdog review, no entry in the public, no bid database. Just a cool $6.2 million handed over to a charity with deep ties to the Newsom family.

[Jack Armstrong]

And even without that, it's a terrible idea. It's just wealth redistribution, even if you didn't have all that. But you throw in the fact that it's a non competitive bid and it's tied into his wife and it. And it would be cheaper if all us taxpayers got together and say, okay, screw it if you're gonna make us do that, let's all go to Costco

[Joe Getty]

and buy the diapers for the poor

[Jack Armstrong]

people and be way cheaper.

[Joe Getty]

One more note. Baby to baby isn't just any charity. Its CEO, Nora Weinstein, sits on the board of the California Partners Project. And who founded the California Partners Project, of course. None other than California's first partner, Jennifer Siebel News. What a remarkable coincidence.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I'm despondent about this. The fact that you can do practically anything you want and Nobody. It's impossible. It's very difficult for people to pay attention.

[Joe Getty]

Right, right. Yeah, it is. And as they make the point in this write up in the massive state budget, there's just a line saying, oh, and this expenditure is exempt from any oversight. And that flies. That is the very definition of lawlessness. Wow, that is something.

[Commercial Actor]

I know.

[Joe Getty]

CBS also found more than two dozen other similar exemptions buried in the 2026 state budget, totaling over an eye watering $1 billion in similarly sneaky appropriations, Every one of them exempt from competitive bidding and public oversight. A few of the new exemptions that compliant state Democrats passed in last year's budget will expire in 2031. Two thirds of the exemptions will never expire.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't have any hope that he pays any price for this sort of stuff, because very few people ever do. The only hope is that it drives him out of the race. I think. I think he won't run. At some point, he's going to decide. It's just, why don't I just stay? You know, I'll be on the board or something. I'm already rich. Why don't I just enjoy the last quarter of my life as a rich guy without all the headaches?

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, I'm really rooting for Steve Hilton in the governor's race this time around. I think he's got a chance. He's got a fighter's chance, as they say. If I were a betting man, I'm not sure I'd bet in favor of him. But it's possible that he will definitely move the ball forward and really open a lot of people's eyes. And then when Gavi runs and gets humiliated because of the miseries of California governance, that'll move the ball a little further. So I haven't abandoned hope yet.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's nice. Some of the hilarious stuff these DSA candidates believe from their website, it's just. It's funny. It's actually funny.

[Joe Getty]

And yet it's troubling because people are signing on.

[Jack Armstrong]

Everyone. Every man will be handed a unicorn that gives fellatio. I mean, it's just.

[Joe Getty]

It's like, wow, wait a minute. It's just fellatio corn. My fondest dream.

[Jack Armstrong]

I was trying to come up with the horn.

[Joe Getty]

Back in.

[Jack Armstrong]

Horny.

[Joe Getty]

What?

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay, I got us off track. More on the way.

[Legal Expert/Commentator]

Stay here.

[Jack Armstrong]

Armstrong and Gettysburg.

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[Joe Getty]

Is democratic socialism compatible with capitalism?

[Jack Armstrong]

In the long term, no. We're anti capitalists. We want a world beyond capitalism. But in the short term, while we're within a capitalist economy, we need firms that are profitable. Profitable that are providing employment, that are providing taxation. In the long term, no. That's one of your democratic socialists talking to Ross Du thought of the New York Times and I'm glad the Times and other organizations are talking to these people and asking the questions and letting everybody know what they actually are. From the DSA website Democratic Socialists of America website it's been said that it's easier to imagine the end of the world than it is to imagine the end of capitalism. But just because it isn't easy to imagine doesn't mean we shouldn't try to make it happen. Workers deserve more. So the fact that they want to tear down our entire system of the number one economy in the world since 1874, I think. Yeah, so there's that. I really, I really enjoy this stuff. It's all so fanciful. It's like a cartoon layout on the website. Speaking of bills, you won't have them anymore. And then it says underneath you have no debt. You don't need health insurance, you don't pay a mortgage or have a landlord because comfortable housing is a human right. Your retirement is publicly funded. Food, education, energy, medicine and transportation aren't for profit businesses. They're common goods and utilities. Paid for by who, you morons?

[Joe Getty]

The efficiently government run industries.

[Jack Armstrong]

You work as much as you're able and no more than needed. On the page about work just, I mean it's. Are they, are they, are they pulling a joke on us Right there.

[Joe Getty]

Somebody, I wish somebody made this website

[Jack Armstrong]

to think how many. Look at, look at these idiots talking about it. They actually believe there's people out here who think this stuff is real. You work as much as you need and no more. Who have you known in your life? What.

[Legal Expert/Commentator]

What is?

[Jack Armstrong]

What is your what? Who have you been surrounded by your whole life? Where you think that would work?

[Joe Getty]

And what does that even mean?

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know. Well, if everything is free, why are you showing up to work at all?

[Legal Expert/Commentator]

Right?

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, because I guess communists on some level believe we would all go into the factory every day even if everything was free, right?

[Joe Getty]

Socialism ignores all of the incentives and disincentives that drive human beings, and they just think everybody will just do what we tell them to.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's that term common good they think that we're all on board with. I want to provide electricity and food and health care and everything like that for everyone. I'm young and healthy, so I'm going to work my ass off every day, all day long to help the people that, you know, can't.

[Joe Getty]

One of the smartest things I ever heard about socialism on the other side

[Jack Armstrong]

of a short break okay, cool. If you missed a segment at the podcast Armstrong and Getty on Demand

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Armstrong

and Gettysburg Bite into a stacked sandwich made with herobread or a fully loaded bagel and the only thing you'll think is delicious. You won't think it's up to 19 grams of protein, but it is. You wouldn't believe it has 11 to 32 grams of fiber, but it does. Herobread makes loaves, buns, tortillas, bagels and noodles packed with taste, but without all the net carbs, we're talking 0 to 5 grams net carbs per serving. With Herobread there are no compromises, just flavor. There's none of the stiff baked goods you'd expect from better for your brands. There's just the soft, fluffy bread you crave, plus small batch drops of indulgent favorites like the popular 2 gram net carb Hero croissant and 3 gram net carb Hero pain au chocolat. And right now, Herobred is offering 10% off your order. Go to Hero Co and use code iHEART at checkout. That's code iHEARTRO, co. All figures per serving of Herobread. See Nutrition Facts on Hero Co. Summer

is here at Orderly Meds. We know this time is a reminder that life is full of new beginnings. Whether you're celebrating the nice weather, starting a new chapter, planning a vacation, or simply looking ahead to what's next, this season can be the perfect time to invest in yourself and your health. If you've struggled with weight loss and are curious about GLP1 medications, orderly meds can help you learn about your options. Through a simple virtual process, you can connect with licensed medical professionals who can determine whether treatment may be appropriate for you. Getting started is fast, convenient and happens online from the comfort of home. This summer, consider a new approach to feeling your best. Visit orderlymeds.com podcast to learn more. That's orderlymeds.com podcast orderly medicine meds.com podcast because every new season is an opportunity to take the next step forward. Compounded medications are not FDA approved, eligibility required and determined by a licensed provider. Individual results may vary. See website for details.

[Ashley Iaconetti]

This is Ashley Iconetti from the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast. Ben I've been reflecting a lot lately on how many big life moments our listeners have experienced with us.

[Ben (from Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast)]

Yeah, it's pretty wild.

[Ashley Iaconetti]

They've watched us go from dating shows to engagements, weddings, babies, buying homes. Every stage comes with new decisions.

[Ben (from Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast)]

The milestones are the fun part, but the planning is where things get real.

[Ashley Iaconetti]

That's why Klarna stands out. Klarna gives people smarter tools to help manage everyday money with flexible ways to pay cash back that builds automatically everything in one place and support that makes everyday decisions feel less overwhelming.

[Ben (from Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast)]

Since life moves so fast, the right tools can help you feel more confident. Download the Klarna app today or visit klarna.com to learn more.

[Klarna Ad Voice]

California resident loans made her arrange pursuant to a California Finance law license and MLS number 1353190. Klarna balance account required to be eligible for cashback points. Limitations, terms and conditions apply.

[X Games Announcer]

The best skaters, BMX riders and moto athletes in the world don't compete in leagues until now. The X Games League Championship is live From New Orleans, July 24th through 26th. Three days of elite action sports, plus performances from metro Boomin, Jid Subtronics and bunt watch on ABC ESPN and ESPN2 stream on the ESPN app, Roku Kick, Amazon and X Games YouTube. The inaugural champion gets crowned this July.

[Commercial Actor]

Smart woman. She's putting a new floor down by herself. Wise woman. She's using Ken tile vinyl as best as tile. Easiest flooring to install, easiest flooring to care. Therefore save every way with Kentil vinyl asbestos tile.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, I'll get some today.

[Joe Getty]

Oh boy. That is from a video that I was sent by an alert listener commercials from the 60s that have not aged well and I thought we needed to lighten the mood a little bit. I've got a perfect example of a beautiful illustration of why socialism will never ever work, but gonna lighten up on that at least for a minute. Meanwhile More commercials from the 60s that haven't aged well.

[Commercial Actor]

Our first house nearly never got built. My wife was so bent on helping the builder. Woman. I said leave that poor man alone and make us some coffee. Not that kind you've been buying either. Instant Maxwell House coffee. Red jar, good to the last drop. Maxwell House. The instinct that tastes like. Like coffee. Be a good little Maxwell Housewife and we'll be happy here for a long time. Maxwell House coffee, instant and ground.

[Jack Armstrong]

I like calling her a woman.

[Joe Getty]

A woman. Be a good little Maxwell Housewife.

[Jack Armstrong]

Listen, woman. Leave him alone. Let him work. What's wrong with that commercial? Make him. Make him.

[Joe Getty]

Exactly.

[Jack Armstrong]

I hear you, Michael. I don't understand.

[Joe Getty]

The strings were too loud in the background, you idiot. And that's the crap you've been making.

[Jack Armstrong]

Make some decent coffee, woman.

[Joe Getty]

More from the world of sexist, sexist coffee.

[Jack Armstrong]

Harvey, want anything special for your birthday?

[Commercial Actor]

Just a decent cup of coffee.

[Jack Armstrong]

You're kidding.

[Commercial Actor]

I'm serious, honey. Your coffee's undrinkable.

[Jack Armstrong]

Pretty harsh.

[Commercial Actor]

Well, so's your coffee.

[Jack Armstrong]

You know, the girls down at the

[Commercial Actor]

office make better coffee on their hot plates. Wow.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

And he didn't even kiss me goodbye.

[Jack Armstrong]

You know, if I could just make a decent cup of coffee, I could relax.

[Commercial Actor]

So relax.

[Jack Armstrong]

Why don't you try Instant Folgers? Tastes good as fresh perked.

[Commercial Actor]

Hey, great coffee.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's Instant Folgers. Doesn't it taste good as fresh perkt?

[Commercial Actor]

Better.

[Jack Armstrong]

Better than those girls make at the office.

[Commercial Actor]

Honey, their coffee can't hold a candle to yours. Instant Folgers taste good as fresh perked.

[Jack Armstrong]

Try it. You know it's always gonna throw you

[Joe Getty]

away like a used tissue. But this is decent coffee. I guess you can stay.

[Jack Armstrong]

Good news. You've earned my love with a decent cup of coffee.

[Joe Getty]

Exactly.

[Jack Armstrong]

This is garbage. The girls down at the office are one hotter, two make better coffee.

[Joe Getty]

And younger.

[Jack Armstrong]

By the way, you know what's interesting about that? I remember that commercial. I remember watching that as a kid. I remember that as a kid. And, and it not. You know, because the culture, it didn't stand out to me as. As anything. It was just. Yeah, got the girls down at the office. Make a better cup of coffee. Honey, I don't know what you do here. It's just. It's undrinkable. And her so upset that her husband is not pleased with what she's making for him.

[Joe Getty]

Well, and, and please, one not be. Need not be a professor of literature to discern the theme. Your coffee's bad, therefore I'm Gonna compare you to the women at the office. And I'm not gonna kiss you goodbye. Right.

[Jack Armstrong]

Withholding affection.

[Joe Getty]

Right, exactly. And you've kind of lost the race. I'm gonna go, I'm gonna get with the gals from the office. A, they're hot. B, they make good coffee. You're done. Speaking of that sort of thing, this is a tab commercial from back in the day. It's filled with wholesomely sexy, soft focusy imagery of a woman with kids. And then the husband's there at one point and all and. Go on.

[Jack Armstrong]

When you can't be with him.

[Commercial Actor]

When you can't be with him, be in his mind. Be a mind sticker with a shape he can't forget.

[Jack Armstrong]

Don't you want to have a good shape? He wants you with a good shape. Shape with Tab.

[Commercial Actor]

Tab can help you stay in his mind. Keeping your shape in shape has its rewards.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

Have a good shape and a tight high ass or he'll be gone with the girls at the office.

[Joe Getty]

Like the coffee guy.

[Jack Armstrong]

Soda commercial. Have a good shape.

[Joe Getty]

I know. So maudlin.

[Jack Armstrong]

I guess that one's pretty funny.

[Joe Getty]

You know, that was with all due disrespect to the idiotic toxic masculinity stuff you get from Marxists. I mean, back in the day, that was absolutely a male ad executive who thought women like soft music. Let's hire this non threatening sounding woman singer to sing at the women about having a good shape.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, what's interesting about that, because I actually remember that commercial with the cab. The girls down at the office make a better cup of coffee. This is garbage. I didn't see that in real life. That wasn't my perception of the real world. Whether because of my parents or like anybody else I saw. I mean, it's not like I, I thought that's the way the world worked. So I don't know, the ads were like really reflective of the world I saw.

[Joe Getty]

Right, right. Yeah. I mean, you could certainly say, well, they're just making the point about coffee. But I mean, in any reasonably healthy relationship you'd say, you know, honey, I'm not loving this coffee. What brand is this?

[Jack Armstrong]

What do you think of it? Yeah, because maybe she likes it. I think it's pretty good. Huh? I don't like it much.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, maybe we should do like, I'll get my brand. No, you've gotta imply that you're going to leave her for the girls at the office.

[Jack Armstrong]

Man, don't think I'm gonna kiss you. I'm not gonna Kiss the lips of someone who made me that cup of crap right there.

[Joe Getty]

Especially when I got the hotties down at the office with their delicious coffee. I'll see you maybe. Slams the door.

[Jack Armstrong]

And by the way, your shape ain't so hot either. Maybe try a Tab.

[Joe Getty]

Mix it a tabby. Oh, my God.

[Commercial Actor]

Oh.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, my God. It's so funny. I can't believe that ever existed.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, I know. It's so lame. Be a mind sticker, right?

[Jack Armstrong]

What is that?

[Commercial Actor]

What?

[Jack Armstrong]

Way to invent a term and then have that weird music.

[Joe Getty]

That song is giving me the willies. I want it swept from my memory. I gotta get, like, PTSD treatment or something. Oh, God. It was musically a crime.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't remember anybody using that term like that. How's her shape or what?

[Joe Getty]

Well, you can be in shape. You want to get in shape. Feet at the bottom, head at the

[Jack Armstrong]

top, like a lot of people.

[Joe Getty]

Thanks to Tab. All right.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, my God. Yeah, I know that made the argument for the other side, unfortunately. But like I said, I. I wasn't. I wasn't. My. My perception as a kid wasn't that, like, that was the. The way the world worked any more than, like, most of the other stuff. Sunday. I didn't think the world worked the way it did on Gilligan's island either.

[Klarna Ad Voice]

So, I mean.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, right, right, right, right. I'm trying to remember my reaction to those sorts of ads. Oh, it's hard to separate it from my. My reaction right now.

[Jack Armstrong]

Can I hear the one with the good shape? At least the first part till they sing the good shape. I want to hear that because that's so weird. When you can't be with him.

[Commercial Actor]

When you can't be with him, be in his mind. Be a mind sticker with a shape he can't forget.

[Jack Armstrong]

Don't you want to have a good shape?

[Joe Getty]

I do. I know, but what do I do?

[Commercial Actor]

Tab can help you stay in his mind. Keeping your shape in shape.

[Joe Getty]

Sugar free.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, Tab is sugar free, right?

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Get the cancer later to a Diet Coke.

[Jack Armstrong]

You'll have the cancer about early 80s if you're drinking that.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, boy, that is wild. Yeah, there are. There are reels and reels of those commercials.

[Jack Armstrong]

And the idea that I'm gonna stick in his mind because if I'm hot enough, I'll stick in his mind. If I'm not not, you ain't gonna be thinking about me at all.

[Joe Getty]

Right. Like, you're not best friends and soul mates and, you know, keep you no

[Jack Armstrong]

raising kids together, you know? Think about me for that reason, it's

[Joe Getty]

if I have shared experience the struggles you've been through.

[Jack Armstrong]

Now, how's your ass?

[Joe Getty]

What does your ass look like? Brought to you by Tab.

[Legal Expert/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't care how hot you are. If you keep serving me this garbage coffee

[Joe Getty]

and then you got your doctors pitching cigarettes.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

A classic of of the the genre and the various cocaine riddled treatments of the early 19th century. And cough syrup with codeine and the rest of it. I love it, love it, love it, love it. That is wild. I know. That Tab song may be the worst thing I've ever heard in the department of music.

[Jack Armstrong]

And then the, the like the choir in the background. The be a blind sticker.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Was that. That must have been a hot phrase for a couple.

[Jack Armstrong]

I've never heard it in my life. Rancid bitter coffee made by your wife. Not the girls down at the office. They got a good shape and they make a great cup of coffee. That's why I kiss them goodbye before I leave work. Not you.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, you crappy honky, crappy coffee, slinging haggard.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know what that shape is. Trump put out an interesting truth social we should hit on and we will finish strong.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Next, Armstrong and Getty.

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is here at orderly meds. We know this time is a reminder that life is full of new beginnings. Whether you're celebrating the nice weather, starting a new chapter, planning a vacation, or simply looking ahead to what's next this season can be the perfect time to invest in yourself and your health. If you've struggled with weight loss and are curious about GLP1 medications, orderly meds can help you learn about your options. Through a simple virtual process, you can connect with licensed medical professionals who can determine whether treatment may be appropriate for you. Getting started is fast, convenient and happens online from the comfort of home. This summer, consider a new approach to feeling your best. Visit orderlymeds.com podcast to learn more. That's orderlymeds.com podcast orderlymeds.com podcast because every new season is an opportunity to take the next step forward, compounded medications are not FDA approved, eligibility required and determined by a licensed provider. Individual results may vary. See website for details.

[Ashley Iaconetti]

This is Ashley from the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast Ben I've been reflecting a lot lately on how many big life moments our listeners have experienced with us.

[Ben (from Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast)]

Yeah, it's pretty wild.

[Ashley Iaconetti]

They've watched us go from dating shows to engagements, weddings, babies, buying homes. Every stage comes with new decisions.

[Ben (from Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast)]

The milestones are the fun part, but the planning is where things get real.

[Ashley Iaconetti]

That's why Klarna stands out. Klarna gives people smarter tools to help manage everyday money with flexible ways to pay cash back that builds automatically everything in one place and support that makes everyday decisions feel less overwhelming.

[Ben (from Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast)]

Since life moves so fast, the right tools can help you feel more confident. Download the Klarna app today or visit klarna.com to learn more.

[Klarna Ad Voice]

California resident loans made her arrange pursuant to a California Finance law license and MLS number 1353, cloud balance account required to be eligible for cashback points. Limitations, terms and conditions apply.

[X Games Announcer]

The first ever X Games League championship is going down live and New Orleans has the call. Three days of elite action sports. A season's worth of competition coming down to one final weekend. Watch July 24 through 26 on ABC, ESPN and ESPN2 or stream on the ESPN app, X Games, YouTube, Kick Roku sports channel and Amazon. The championship starts July 24. Don't miss the moment it becomes history. Both the United States and Iran have left open the door for a diplomatic solution. No breakthrough has been reached yet, despite efforts from Qatar and Pakistan. Secretary of State Marco Rubio said earlier today that Iran is not serious about talks right now.

[Marco Rubio]

We remain open to diplomacy. We remain open to working it out in a negotiation appreciated way. But right now they don't seem to be serious about that and so we're going to continue to protect shipping. We think other countries should join us in that endeavor. We don't need them to, but they should because they're more impacted by it than we are. And at the same time, we are going to, when the opportunity presents itself, degrade their ability to target global shipping.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, Marco is at least living in reality with. They don't seem to be serious at all. Talking about Iran, of course, and I have no idea where this is going, but Trump put this truth social out this morning because Iran fired on some ships. Again, from this point forward, anytime the Islamic Republic of Iran shoots at a ship in the Strait of Hormuz, whether it be by missile, rocket, drone, or any other device or weapon, the United States will bomb and destroy one bridge or power plant. That's in all caps. Every time they shoot at a ship with anything, we will bomb and destroy one bridge or power plant, including those located next to or in the capital city of Tehran. Thank you for your attention to this matter. We're gonna bomb the power plants and bridges in Tehran, are we?

[Joe Getty]

At least some of them. You gotta live up to that threat.

[Jack Armstrong]

I mean, you don't have to. You can claim to wipe them off the map and then do nothing, like he has done in the past. I think that's where we're going. Reluctantly. He clearly doesn't want to, but that's clearly where we're going.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Then you gotta outlast them. Who can take the pain. They're getting more pain than we are, but they don't give a damn.

[Jack Armstrong]

No, they do not.

[Joe Getty]

All right, yes or no answer. Is Weirdbeard junior Dead?

[Jack Armstrong]

I think he is, yeah. I was convinced by some analyst I saw on News Nation the other day, said the fact that we haven't seen him at all. Not at all. Not even a still picture, not even

[Joe Getty]

propped up in bed with soft focus. And obviously a voice over the Mitch

[Jack Armstrong]

McConnell picture the other day. Not even one of those.

[Joe Getty]

Right, right. And we blew his beard off and took his head with it, apparently.

[Jack Armstrong]

And I can understand how it's the only way you can hold together. Probably not even holding together very, very well. I'm sure there's a lot of infighting we'll learn about years from now who's in charge. And it probably change on a daily basis, weekly basis, or somebody fires off against ships and other. Some other people are saying, what'd you do that for? You know, that sort of thing. And the only reason, the only way they can hold this together kind of is to pretend that the Supreme Leader still exists and we're all following his orders. I mean, if you got rid of that ruse, then it's just a full out civil war for who's in charge.

[Joe Getty]

So it's kind of Ramaton with Bernie. I was working on that for longer than I'm proud of.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's pretty funny.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, Bernie. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good one. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. I remain where I've been for a long time. I have no idea how this plays out. About.

[Jack Armstrong]

No, I don't. I don't know either.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, you know what we ought to do before we leave?

[Jack Armstrong]

We bombed him 11 nights in a row. And I'll bet we do a 12th.

[Joe Getty]

Michael, give me 60. 61, 62. Back to back to back.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Israel's Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu is perhaps planning to visit New York for the UN General Assembly. What will happen if he comes in September?

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay. I believe that Prime Minister Netanyahu belongs in the Hague. Benjamin Netanyahu is a war criminal, the architect of a horrific genocide against the Palestinian people. He is responsible for the killing of more than 73,000 people. It is clear that we do not have the independent legal authority to enforce this warrant. The federal government, however, does, and I call on them to join the ICC and execute this warrant.

[Ashley Iaconetti]

Give us a reality check here. Can Mandani have Netanyahu arrested?

[Legal Expert/Commentator]

Absolutely not. It is utterly ridiculous for the Mayor of New York City to even suggest suggests that he might have the authority to order the arrest of Benjamin Netanyahu or any visiting foreign head of state. First of all, the Mayor of New York City has zero law enforcement authority. He does not tell the Manhattan da, the nypd, who to arrest, who to indict. The Constitution is quite clear that the conduct of foreign diplomacy, foreign affairs, is entirely up to the federal government. It's certainly not up to local and county governments in New York City or elsewhere. So I know the mayor's having his best lawyers look at this right now. Let me save them some time. You do not have the authority to do this.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, I guess governing by meme. Yeah, exactly. You're all laughing at it. No, he accomplished what he wanted to accomplish. He doesn't think he could have arrested Benjamin Netanyahu. He got the message out to all the young idiots or anti Semites in the country that he's their leader. That's. He accomplished. We wanted to accomplish.

[Joe Getty]

Exactly. Tribal signaling.

[Jack Armstrong]

He never at any moment thought he could arrest Benjamin Netanyahu or was going to try to do it, guaranteed. Yeah, so laugh all you want, but he got that message out. And how about all the other world leaders that have been. I'm not even going to acknowledge the number he threw out on that story. But if you're going to all the world leaders that have killed multiples of that or imprison their own people or whatever, or they currently have slaves. Yeah, yeah. Like President Xi. Here's your host for final Thoughts, Joe Getty.

[Joe Getty]

That was better than the tab song. All right, let's get a final thought from everybody on the crew to wrap up the day the show. There he is, Michelangelo pressing the buttons. Michael, what's your final thought?

[X Games Announcer]

Yeah, I love those 1960s commercials. If you look online, the Flintstones used to do the cigarette commercials and those are really funny to see.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh yeah,

[Joe Getty]

Fred, I'm trying to sell Barney on Winston's or whatever it is. Fabulous. Jack, a final thought for us.

[Jack Armstrong]

Hey Fred, I see a dark spot on your lungs. Is.

[Joe Getty]

Come on, Bon.

[Jack Armstrong]

Is Charlie woods playing in the US Amateur golf tournament?

[Joe Getty]

Tiger woods kid, maybe.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, you don't know.

[Joe Getty]

I don't know.

[Jack Armstrong]

I just saw that he snapped at a photographer who clicked one at an inopportune moment. I thought, wow, is he going to be just like his dad.

[Joe Getty]

Just like the old man you taking up fraking pictures.

[Jack Armstrong]

Then he went to a Perkins restaurant and hit on the waitress and wow, crash his car into a tree on ambient. He'll be just like his dad.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, that's sweet.

[Jack Armstrong]

Final thoughts.

[Joe Getty]

Smithsonian Institution is utterly perverse. Their liar. Their leader rather is a Marxist liar. And if you missed that segment, grab it via podcast. Armstrong and Getty on demand. We talked about it last week on one more thing and today during our three of the show, I think there

[Jack Armstrong]

is a lot of good stuff today. You should grab all the segments and give them a listen. Armstrong.

[Joe Getty]

A couple of unfortunate moments too.

[Jack Armstrong]

Armstrong and Getty wrapping up another grueling four hour workday.

[Joe Getty]

So many people. Thanks a little time. Go to armstrong getty.com A lot of great hot links for you there. We got some fabulous a swag. Drop us a note. Got an opinion mailbag at Armstrong and giddy dot com.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, we'll have the latest tomorrow. God bless America. Armstrong and Getty. I'm not sure I need the whole inflatable vest. It's barely ever helped anybody in the history of flying with 8 quintillion flights.

[Joe Getty]

You're more likely to be shot down by a ufo.

[Jack Armstrong]

Frankly, yes.

[Tony Ayo]

Yes.

[Jack Armstrong]

You're more likely to be sexed to death by Bigfoot than knowing how to blow in that inflatable thing. It's gonna save you in a plane crash.

[Joe Getty]

Now that is a fate I'd never even contemplated. Armstrong and Gettysburg

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Summer is here At Orderly Meds, we know this time is a reminder that life is full of new beginnings. Whether you're celebrating the nice weather, starting a new chapter, planning a vacation, or simply looking ahead to what's next, this season can be the perfect time to invest in yourself and your health. If you've struggled with weight loss and are curious about GLP1 medications, orderly meds can help you learn about your options. Through a simple virtual process, you can connect with licensed medical professionals who can determine whether treatment may be appropriate Appropriate for you. Getting started is fast, convenient and happens online from the comfort of home. This summer, consider a new approach to feeling your best. Visit orderlymeds.com podcast to learn more. That's orderlymeds.com podcast orderlymeds.com podcast because every new season is an opportunity to take the next step forward, compounded medications are not FDA approved, eligibility required and determined by a licensed provider. Individual results may be vary c website for details.

[Tony Ayo]

This is Tony Ayo from the Real Report with Tony Ayo and Uncle Murder. You ever notice how everything keeps going up? Rent, streaming, even extra Sosa at your favorite burrito spot. But with Boost Mobile, you don't have to play the Willis Go up soon game. Boost Mobile offers an unlimited talk, text and data plan at a price that'll never go up. It's the same price you'll pay for life. Switch now for unlimited wireless at a price that'll never go up. Only at boost mobile. After 30 gigabytes, customers may experience slower speeds. Customers will pay $25 a month as long as they remain activ on the Boost Unlimited plan.

[X Games Announcer]

The first ever X Games League championship is going down live and New Orleans has the call. Three days of elite action sports. A season's worth of competition coming down to one final weekend. Watch July 24th through 26th on ABC, ESPN and ESPN2, or stream on the ESPN app, X Games, YouTube, Kick, Roku Sports Channel and and Amazon. The championship starts July 24. Don't miss the moment it becomes history.

[Bethenny Frankel]

This is Bethenny Frankel from Just Be with Bethenny Frankel. Let me be blunt. Most dog food is junk. It just is. And I'm not feeding junk to Biggie and Smalls. That is why they eat just food for dogs. It's real, 100% human grade food with ingredients I actually recognize, not mystery pellets pretending to be healthy. And once I switched, the difference was obvious. Better digestion, better skin, more energy. Dogs who actually feel good instead of just surviving dinner. Here's the thing. You care about quality. You make an intentional choice to be healthy. So why are you gambling with your dog's health? So let's think about our furry babies. Go to justfood for dogs.com right now and get 50% off your first box. No code. Just try it. Because once you see the difference, you're not going back.