Armstrong & Getty On Demand: "Don't Talk About Your Breasts Being Moist" – Detailed Summary

Release Date: November 22, 2024

The latest episode of Armstrong & Getty On Demand, hosted by Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty, delves into a myriad of current events, political dynamics, media critiques, and light-hearted discussions surrounding Thanksgiving traditions. In their signature candid and humorous style, Armstrong and Getty navigate through complex topics, offering insights, critiques, and plenty of memorable quotes. Below is a comprehensive summary of the episode, highlighting key discussions, notable quotes, and the overarching themes.

1. Political Climate and Administrative Shifts

The episode opens with Armstrong sharing a text from a federal government meeting, highlighting a transition from a "touchy feely, caring administration" to a "militant administration with teary eyes."

• Jack Armstrong [00:53]: "I got a text yesterday from a friend who works in the federal government locally and they were at a little meeting and one dude said we're going from a very touchy feely, caring administration who cares about people to a very militant administration with teary eyes."

Joe Getty expresses his amusement and disbelief at such statements, emphasizing the stark contrast in administrative tones.

• Joe Getty [01:19]: "I guess you develop the discipline it takes not to guffaw in that line. Are you serious, dude? I would. I would literally guffaw."

The discussion underscores their skepticism towards the administration's portrayal and the authenticity of its transitions.

2. Celebrity Relocations and Financial Privileges

Armstrong and Getty transition into discussing celebrities like Ellen DeGeneres, Portia de Rossi, and Richard Gere moving abroad, questioning their motivations and the financial liberties that enable such moves.

• Jack Armstrong [01:37]: "How about the people that have moved? Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi actually moved to Great Britain. Richard Gere has actually moved."

• Joe Getty [01:59]: "And be think of, think of the praise and approval that rains down on them from their peers for doing that."

The hosts critique the perceived frivolity and superficiality behind these relocations, suggesting that financial stability allows celebrities to make such temporary moves without significant consequences.

3. Trump’s Return and Cabinet Choices

A significant portion of the episode focuses on the potential return of Donald Trump to the presidency and his cabinet selections.

• Joe Getty [02:00 – 03:14]: Engages in a lighthearted banter about Trump's dominance, mentioning figures like Elon Musk and Matt Gaetz, likening the cabinet to an "alien versus predator."

Armstrong highlights the formation of what he terms "the most epic cabinet of all time," blending humor with political critique.

• Jack Armstrong [03:05]: "He's the president again."

The hosts express skepticism about the efficacy and seriousness of Trump's cabinet choices, hinting at performative politics rather than substantive governance.

4. Media Critique: MSNBC’s Declining Ratings and Performative Politics

Armstrong and Getty delve into a critical analysis of MSNBC, particularly focusing on the declining ratings of shows like Morning Joe and the hefty salaries of hosts like Rachel Maddow.

• Jack Armstrong [08:20]: "Trump gained 95,000 votes in New York City, while the Democrats lost half a million. ... they’re flat out racist liars on most of those shows."

• Joe Getty [11:07]: "I have not fully realized the incredible gravy train that a lot of their people were on and B, how miserable their ratings are and how, I mean, it’s not like swirling the drain, it's plunging off a cliff."

The hosts argue that MSNBC engages in performative politics, presenting a façade to maintain credibility and viewer loyalty. They point out discrepancies between the network's political stances and their declining viewership metrics.

• Joe Getty [19:11]: "They had not realized the full extent to which they had built a bubbled little cult."

Armstrong and Getty emphasize the disconnection between MSNBC's performative actions and the reality of their audience's perceptions, suggesting a potential downfall if current trends continue.

5. Health and Nutrition: The Battle Against Ultra-Processed Foods

Shifting gears, the hosts discuss the prevalence of ultra-processed foods, using Froot Loops as a case study to illustrate misconceptions about food labeling and health.

• Jack Armstrong [22:07]: "Froot Loops only has 12 grams of sugar. It’s like a third what is in Honey Nut Cheerios..."

• Joe Getty [24:22]: "I look at like ultra processed foods similar to alcohol. Okay, I will permit this much, but not more than that."

The conversation critiques both governmental and corporate influences on food nutrition, highlighting the deceptive marketing practices that mask the unhealthy components of seemingly benign products. Armstrong advocates for increased awareness and a shift towards natural eating habits, equating the consumption of processed foods to habits like smoking.

• Jack Armstrong [24:58]: "It would be great if...you’d be embarrassed if people found out you were feeding your kids this stuff because it’s so bad."

6. Thanksgiving Traditions and Humor

In a lighter segment, Armstrong and Getty explore Thanksgiving traditions, particularly the challenges of cooking the perfect turkey. They interweave humor with relatable anecdotes about holiday preparations.

• Joe Getty [27:57]: "Crisp, delicious, seals in the juices. But now I grill it. I cover it with foil and all, and I inject Cajun seasoning special juice into all the parts of the turkey."

• Jack Armstrong [28:20]: "Don't talk about your breasts being moist. What?"

The hosts discuss various cooking methods, the pitfalls of using fryers, and share humorous takes on common Thanksgiving mishaps. They also reference a New York Times essay on the futility of pardoning turkeys, blending satire with cultural commentary.

7. International Affairs: Missile Strikes in Ukraine

The episode touches upon the escalating tensions in Ukraine, specifically Russia's deployment of a new hypersonic missile called the Hazelnut, as reported by CNN.

• Katie Greener [29:39]: Provides a detailed account of the missile strike, highlighting its significance and the potential for nuclear response.

• Jack Armstrong [30:22]: Expresses skepticism about the report but acknowledges the importance of staying informed about the ongoing conflict.

The discussion underscores the unpredictability of international relations and the potential global ramifications of such military advancements.

8. Final Thoughts and Wrap-Up

As the episode nears its conclusion, Armstrong and Getty share their final thoughts, balancing reflections on the week's topics with personal anecdotes.

• Joe Getty [35:35]: "My final thought is much more heavy than Jack's and significant... I am thankful for two things. That I have a job I love to do mostly and also that we have some time off from it."

• Jack Armstrong [35:20]: Encourages listeners to follow the show on Twitter for updates on his travels and activities.

The hosts finish the episode with a blend of humor, sincerity, and encouragement for their audience to engage with their content and embrace the upcoming vacation week.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Jack Armstrong [03:01]: "Always loud when he comes here. But now that he's won... He's the president again."

• Joe Getty [08:20]: "Donald Trump's world and we're just living in it."

• Jack Armstrong [09:55]: "No, you won't."

• Joe Getty [16:46]: "Anti Semite racial agitator, shameless grifter, said to be making the high six figures."

• Jack Armstrong [22:07]: "Froot Loops only has 12 grams of sugar."

• Joe Getty [24:22]: "Ultra processed foods similar to alcohol. Okay, I will permit this much, but not more than that."

• Jack Armstrong [28:20]: "Don't talk about your breasts being moist. What?"

• Joe Getty [35:35]: "I am thankful for two things. That I have a job I love to do mostly and also that we have some time off from it."

Conclusion

In "Don't Talk About Your Breasts Being Moist," Armstrong and Getty deliver a multifaceted episode that navigates through political satire, media criticism, health awareness, and holiday humor. Their ability to intertwine serious commentary with light-hearted banter ensures that listeners are both informed and entertained. By addressing timely issues with their characteristic bluntness and wit, Armstrong and Getty continue to solidify their place as influential voices in the podcasting landscape.