I don't see any amputees!

Summary

Podcast Summary: Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: I don't see any amputees!
Date: March 16, 2026
Hosts: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty
Podcast Network: iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

This episode takes a satirical and critical look at the Oscars and, specifically, the Academy's diversity and inclusion requirements for Best Picture eligibility. The hosts discuss the impact of these rules on filmmaking, poke fun at Hollywood hypocrisy, and riff on how these standards might influence both the movies and the public's perception of their authenticity. Along the way, they share personal reactions to recent Oscar nominees, particularly the film "Marty Supreme" and Timothée Chalamet's performance.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Oscars and Their Relevance

• Oscars as a Signal for Film Watching: Jack admits the Oscars still serve as a tip-off for movies he might be interested in.

  • “I do pay some attention to the Oscars because it tips me off to things I want to see.” (04:00, Jack Armstrong)

• Indifference and Hostility to the Oscars: Both hosts are, by and large, uninterested in the actual Oscar ceremony, expressing near-zero, or even "anti-interest."

  • “Is it possible to pay anti attention to something?” (06:25, Jack Armstrong)
  • “I now have anti interest in the Oscars.” (17:42, Joe Getty)

Diversity & Inclusion Requirements for Best Picture

• Satirical Take on Qualifications: The hosts lampoon the Academy’s newly imposed quotas—covering everything from racial/ethnic representation to disability, gender, and sexuality—required for eligibility.

  • “You've got to meet various qualifications... at least 30% of all actors for an Oscar-nominated film must be from two underrepresented groups...” (07:33, Jack Armstrong)

• Mock Scenarios: They invent absurd scenarios in which movie productions scramble to fulfill these quotas, sometimes with token or fraudulent hires.

  • “You hire somebody on for your movie and you say, hey, could you do me a favor and limp around all the time? … If I give you this signal, you gotta start limping because that means the inspector’s on the set.” (08:52–09:15, Jack & Joe)

• Goodhart’s Law Reference: The hosts highlight the paradox of such quotas using Goodhart’s Law.

  • “Once a measure becomes a goal, it ceases to be a good measure.” (08:27, Jack Armstrong)

Impact on Art and Authenticity

• Damage to Artistic Integrity: The hosts argue that rigid rules undermine authentic storytelling and artistic merit—using examples of films set in places and times where diversity by modern standards would be illogical.

  • “I’m making a movie about fishermen in Norway and I gotta have a Latino X in it.” (07:16, Joe Getty)

• Cynicism Around Compliance: They speculate that people will fake or exaggerate qualifying traits just to get hired, leading to more insincerity than real progress.

  • “Will they falsely claim to be descended from Nuitts? What do you think?... Limbo put up with being raped? Harvey Weinstein. You don't think they'll falsely claim, ‘Yeah, I got some hearing loss on the right side’?” (16:22–16:55, Joe Getty)

Affirmative Action’s Insidious Side Effects

• Suspicion & Perception: They point out that quotas can lead everyone to wonder if a non-white or underrepresented actor was hired for talent or to fill a checklist, which potentially undermines any real progress.

  • “As the great philosopher Thomas Sowell has pointed out many times… now anytime I see… a black guy… you’re thinking, oh, they had to put a black guy in there as opposed to, no, he’s a really gifted actor… It makes everybody under suspicion.” (18:09, Joe Getty)

• Tokenism in Internships and Creative Roles: The hosts also ridicule the requirement that key creative roles and internships must be filled by underrepresented groups—even suggesting studios will fake compliance.

  • “Warner Brothers makes up a fake internship… What am I supposed to do? I don't care. Go sit over there. You're an intern.” (18:41, Jack Armstrong)

Personal Reactions to Films & Performances

• Praise for Timothée Chalamet in 'Marty Supreme': Jack reviews the film and lauds Chalamet’s acting, offering a peek into how the Oscars sometimes inform moviegoing habits—despite all the surrounding baggage.

  • “We really, really enjoyed it. I highly recommend it. His performance is freaking unbelievable. He might be my favorite current actor.” (04:00, Jack Armstrong)

• ‘Noodle Boy’/Sex Symbol Riff: The duo riffs on the ‘noodle boy’ archetype and modern sex symbol standards, drawing contrasts with past eras.

  • “These really skinny metrosexual dudes like Chalamet… he's clearly a noodle boy… man, he is a skeleton.” (05:09, Jack Armstrong)

• Quoting Outrageous Movie Lines: One particularly crude line from "Marty Supreme" stands out.

  • “How about I put my penis where your mouth is?” (06:01, Jack Armstrong)

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Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• On Artistic Quotas:

  • “You're going to make a film and... I don't know. I walked around and I didn't see anybody who seemed to be blind or hard of hearing.” (07:55, Jack Armstrong)

• On the Futility of the System:

  • “Critics have argued the criteria is too easily met. No kidding. Oppenheimer… qualified for Best Picture through its studio’s backing music. So there was somebody that played on some of the music for the movie Oppenheimer that, I don't know, was in a wheelchair or something. So gay or whatever. Right? How crazy is that?” (14:58, Jack Armstrong)

• On Hollywood’s Self-congratulation:

  • “On a couple ends… putting rules on art is what. But then to feel like you're accomplishing something.” (19:05, Jack Armstrong)
  • “To be so self-congratulatory and self-righteous that you think you've moved forward…” (19:31, Joe Getty)

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Important Timestamps & Segment Highlights

• Oscar Parties & Indifference (03:15–04:14): Both hosts admit to minimal interest in the Oscars, except as movie pointers.
• Chalamet in 'Marty Supreme' (04:00–05:51): Review and breakdown of Chalamet’s role and the 'noodle boy' phenomenon.
• Crude Movie Line (06:01–06:12): A highlighted laugh-out-loud moment.
• The Quota System Unpacked (06:25–14:58): Main segment on the specifics and absurdities of the new Academy requirements.
• Goodhart’s Law Applied (08:13–08:31): Explanation of how metrics-as-goals undermine authenticity.
• Examples of Compliance and Satire (08:52–09:15; 16:14–16:55): Comic sketches about how studios might meet diversity requirements through absurd means.
• Impact on Audience Perception & Tokenism (18:09–18:59): Discussion on how these policies affect the perception of underrepresented artists and the proliferation of meaningless internships.

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Tone and Style

The conversation throughout is irreverent, sarcastic, and full of quick-fire banter. Jack and Joe frequently rely on deadpan humor to lampoon the Oscars, the entertainment industry, and cultural trends.

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Summary

This episode uses the Oscars' new diversity requirements as a launching pad for a broader critique of performative inclusion in Hollywood. Through biting humor and personal anecdotes, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty question whether these rules really support genuine representation or just create new layers of insincerity and bureaucracy. For listeners, the episode delivers a skeptical, comedic take on the intersection of art, politics, and industry self-congratulation.

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Transcript

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So good.

[Joe Getty]

Your bill, ladies.

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I got it.

[Joe Getty]

I got it.

[Jack Armstrong]

No, I got it. Seriously, I insist.

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I insisted first.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, don't be silly.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

You know, be silly.

[Jack Armstrong]

People with The Wells Fargo ActiveCash credit card prefer to pay because they earn unlimited 2% cash rewards on purchases. Okay.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

Rock, paper, scissors for it. Rock, paper, scissors. Shoot.

[Jack Armstrong]

No. The Wells Fargo active cash credit card. Visit Wells Fargo.com ActiveCash terms apply. You know, it's a really good movie, but I didn't see any amputees. It's one more thing. Armstrong and Getty.

[Joe Getty]

One more thing.

[Jack Armstrong]

What? We're all a little hungover from our

[Public Investing Announcer]

Oscar parties last night.

[Jack Armstrong]

We're big Oscar people around here.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, Lord.

[Jack Armstrong]

Did anybody watch a single second of the show? Nope. Yeah, I did. You did? Yeah. Good for you. I didn't.

[Joe Getty]

Was your bride interest interested or were you driving that train? It was mainly her, but, you know,

[Jack Armstrong]

we watched it for the show, so to speak.

[Joe Getty]

Get a little show prep and.

[Jack Armstrong]

Good for you. And that's. Yeah. The only reason I do most things is pay attention to most things is for the show. I have no idea, once I'm done with this job if I'll pay attention to anything ever again. But I. I do pay some attention to the Oscars because it's. It tips me off to things I want to see. Like, I watched Marty supreme only because Chalamet was nominated for best Oscar. Oscar. And I heard about how great his performance was, otherwise I wouldn't have known about the movie. So we watched it over the weekend. We really, really enjoyed it. I highly recommend it. His performance is freaking unbelievable. He might be my favorite current actor.

[Joe Getty]

He's terrific.

[Jack Armstrong]

In all the world.

[Joe Getty]

You know, Sean Pen, who won the best supporting actor, is an amazing artist. He's absolutely crazy good. But you know what's interesting about stars? Excuse me? Joe's allergic.

[Guest or Co-host]

He's allergic to talking about this.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. Even talking about the Oscars makes me cough.

[Joe Getty]

I'm trying to choke it out, but I can't. I'm choking on my hatred. No, but you'd think if you were one of the great gifted artists, you know, in your field, that would be enough. But everybody's also got to be a, like, top notch political commentator, right? Kind of funny.

[Jack Armstrong]

This is not a spoiler alert from Marty Supreme. Really? Although it's a funny line which kind of gets rid of them if I repeat it but I'm going to repeat it anyways. He does an amazing job of pulling off as a noodle boy. I had to explain that term to a whole bunch of people who had never heard it before. The whole noodle boy thing is like a section of sex symbols that apparently a lot of chicks are into. These really skinny metrosexual dudes like Chalamet, he's dating one of the Kardashians. One of the hot Kardashians that like noodle boys. He's clearly a noodle boy. He's shirtless a fair amount in this movie. Man, he is a skeleton.

[Guest or Co-host]

I so don't get that.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't get that either. But any. I mean then that's the way he's built. It's not a. He can't help it. But the fact that that has become like a sex symbol style is kind of interesting to me.

[Joe Getty]

But it reminds me almost of the early 70s when early mid-70s when like metrosexual kind of gender bendy, you know, kind of hairless, skinny heroin looking dudes were sex. Jimmy Page, you know, David Bowie, that sort of character.

[Jack Armstrong]

Although if I a chick I'd like Shalomite. Just cuz he's very, very cool. But his character at one point he's playing. He's a. He's a table tennis hustler. Which does not give anything away. One guy says how about you put your money where your mouth is? He said how about I put my penis where your mouth is? Oh my God. Wow. I see that as a spoiler.

[Guest or Co-host]

There it is.

[Jack Armstrong]

My kids laughed really hard at that one.

[Joe Getty]

I'll bet they did. Good lord.

[Jack Armstrong]

But anyway, you know, I had forgotten this crap about the Oscars or I would have paid even less attention. I didn't watch one second and I would have paid less attention than that.

[Joe Getty]

Is it possible to pay anti attention to something?

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. If I had remembered their new qualifications for movies being considered for Best Picture.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

Oh right.

[Jack Armstrong]

I've forgotten all about that lead. Or significant sporting actors from unrepresented racial or ethnic groups that you need to have a certain number and all these different things to be to qualify for a best picture nominee. That's why my joke was as a really good movie. But I didn't see any amputees. You've got to, you've got to meet various qualifications.

[Joe Getty]

Right.

[Jack Armstrong]

This may include African American, East Asian, Hispanic or Latina. E, O or X. It has here the Academy wants you to say Latin E, Latino or Latinx. Okay.

[Joe Getty]

Or all three or okay, great.

[Jack Armstrong]

Indigenous people, Middle Eastern, Pacific Islander, South Asian, Southeast, and at least all these different things. And you have to have.

[Joe Getty]

I love that. I'm making a movie about fishermen in Norway and I gotta have a Latino X in it.

[Jack Armstrong]

A Viking film. This is Vikings. This is Norwegians taking on.

[Joe Getty]

Okay, this is the Vikings invading Britain in the year 1300.

[Jack Armstrong]

At least 30% of all actors for an Oscar nominated film must be from two underrepresented groups, which may include women, racial or ethnic group, LGBTQ plus, or people with cognitive or physical disabilities or who are deaf or hard of hearing.

[Guest or Co-host]

This is so messed up for art.

[Jack Armstrong]

You're going to make a film and. I don't know. I don't know. I walked around and I didn't see anybody who seemed to be blind or hard of hearing.

[Joe Getty]

So sorry. The characters are the actors.

[Jack Armstrong]

The last one. Actors? Yeah. Not the characters, the actors.

[Joe Getty]

This is hilarious. Hilarious. It's a great illustration of how Goodheart's paradox works.

[Jack Armstrong]

Is that Goodhart's Law? Yeah, once a law, once a

[Joe Getty]

measure

[Jack Armstrong]

becomes a standard, once a measure becomes a goal, it ceases to be a good measure.

[Joe Getty]

Yes, right, exactly. So, you know, I would say, yeah, I played in bands for years and I kind of got some hearing loss from the guitar amps. They'd be like, thank God. Sign this statement to that effect. All right, you're hired. You just go around. Anybody who could reasonably claim, yeah, my

[Jack Armstrong]

granddad, I think was a Sioux Indian,

[Joe Getty]

or maybe it was my great grand. Good enough.

[Jack Armstrong]

Sign here. Or you hire somebody on for your movie and you say, hey, could you do me a favor and limp around all the time? What? I just need you to limp around all the time. It's a long story. If you could just limp around or

[Joe Getty]

if I give you this signal, you gotta start limping because that means the inspector's on the set. All right, boss. Whatever it takes.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, my God.

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Com the no.

[Jack Armstrong]

And then this one, which is even crazier than that. Your main storyline subject matter. So now you're telling the artists of the world you're only allowed to paint bowls of fruit or. Or a Madonna with child. These are the only things you're allowed to paint. Which actually kind of was the rules

[Joe Getty]

back in the old ancient Pope. Happy to do that for you.

[Jack Armstrong]

The main storyline or subject matter, the main storylines has to be centered on an. At least a part of the theme or narrative of the film has to be centered on an unrepresented group. Women, racial or ethnic group, LGBTQ+ or people with cognitive or physical disabilities or deaf or hard of hearing.

[Joe Getty]

Hard of hearing, yes.

[Jack Armstrong]

And so like I'm trying to think back at movies and then. And then another interesting thing. And this is so you got to

[Joe Getty]

have somebody go into a deli or whatever. I'll have the ham and Swiss. I'm sorry, say that again. I got a little hearing loss. The ham and Swiss. And you've satisfied the standard. Oh, great.

[Guest or Co-host]

Turn this into a drinking game.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, no kidding. One of the themes in Marty supreme was him being Jewish. I wonder if they had to work that into the script because it didn't

[Joe Getty]

wasn't surprised Hollywood accepts horrible Zionist as a special case.

[Jack Armstrong]

It wasn't important to the. Oh, you know what? One of the actors who was really, really good was crazy overweight. I'll bet he counted. Oh yeah, because he was like really, really big, good actor. But you know, it's the whole DEI thing. You know, he'll wonder for the rest of his life, did I get hired because I'm a good actor or did you need a profoundly obese person to Qualify for Best Picture.

[Guest or Co-host]

They needed to satisfy the body positivity movement.

[Jack Armstrong]

Here's some problem. Critics have argued the criteria is too easily met. No kidding. Oppenheimer, despite its predominantly white cast, qualified for Best Picture through its. Through its studios. Backing music. So there was somebody that played on some of the music for the movie Oppenheimer that, I don't know, was in a wheelchair or something. So gay or whatever. Right? How crazy is that? Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

You hear that background music in that scene? Yeah. The third tier violinist is gay. I think he looks gay. Anyway, sign here.

[Jack Armstrong]

I saw him looking at a dude once. I don't know. You asked, right?

[Joe Getty]

Oh, these people are so. There's such a parody of themselves.

[Jack Armstrong]

They really, really are.

[Joe Getty]

And they have no idea of it.

[Jack Armstrong]

Again, I paid no attention to it. I would have paid less attention if I'd have remembered these stupid, stupid lists. I mean, God dang it. They go on and on about the importance of film and our art and as an artist, I. Okay, you're an artist who has put down ridiculous quotas for qualifying for art. That's not the way art works.

[Joe Getty]

Hey, you got dark hair. Are you willing to claim your ancestors were Inuits? Will it get me the job? Yes. Well, then, yes, I will.

[Jack Armstrong]

How?

[Joe Getty]

Or. Mm. Where are the whales this season? I know. Whatever you need. I mean, in Hollywood, where people will. Will perform sexual acts on loathsome old fat guys, will they falsely claim to be descended from Nuitzg? What do you think? Good Lord. Or Limbo put up with being raped? Harvey Weinstein. You don't think they'll falsely claim? Yeah, I got some hearing loss on the right side. Oh, my God, you people are hilarious.

[Jack Armstrong]

For instance, for putting your movie together, at least two of the key creative roles, such as casting director, cinematographer, composer, director, editor, producer or writer, must be from an unrepresentative group, Underrepresented group. So if you go to the list of, you know, the people in the credits, you gotta. There better be a black woman in here somewhere or a Hispanic dude or something, or this picture doesn't count.

[Joe Getty]

I read a piece by a right, a white writer in Variety who's like, yeah, all of a sudden we can't get hired. And now I know why. That's. That's brutal.

[Jack Armstrong]

And then this one. The film's distribution or financing company.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, boy.

[Jack Armstrong]

Must offer paid apprenticeships or internships for underrepresented groups across departments like production, product, music, blah, blah, blah.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, okay. Oh, my God. Again, this is. This is anti caring. Now, I have achieved the Theoretical physicists have speculated that this can occur. I now have anti interest in the Oscars.

[Guest or Co-host]

Well, this is going to ripple out for me because now anytime I see anything that comes out of Hollywood and I see you know exactly this character or that character and be like up, take a shot.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

That's the insidious part of affirmative action. As the great philosopher Thomas Sowell has pointed out many times. The sidekicker, the guy down the block who turns out to be the main character's friend is a black guy. You're thinking, oh, they had to put a black guy in there as opposed to. No, he's a really gifted actor. And you know, that's a neighborhood where you might find black people. No, because it makes everybody under suspicion

[Guest or Co-host]

should piss off all the quote, underrepresented groups.

[Joe Getty]

Oh yeah.

[Guest or Co-host]

So you know you're a check mark.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right, like, and that last one I'm sure is easy. So Warner Brothers makes up a fake internship. They hire some 20 year old who's 1 8th Cherokee and says show up every Monday at 6. What am I supposed to do? I don't care. Go sit over there. You're an intern.

[Joe Getty]

Do something, do nothing. I don't care. Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh my God. That's art. That is hilarious. It's hilarious. On a couple ends the obvious, which we've said a bunch of times is just putting rules on art is what. But then to feel like you're accomplishing something.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, to be so self congratulatory and

[Jack Armstrong]

self righteous that you think you've moved forward.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

The, the lives of underrepresented people because of matching this. So you can get nominated for a best picture. Yeah, whatever.

[Joe Getty]

And to be so harshly judgmental of anybody who doesn't think you're doing, you know, the most valuable work on earth. Yeah. Oh, those people are beneath.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. And then they go up there and give a speech about how awful we are. Hilarious.

[Joe Getty]

Can you imagine telling Sean Penn he

[Jack Armstrong]

has to limp around in the last scene or something? Well, I guess that's it.

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