Armstrong & Getty On Demand
Episode: I Have To Apologize To Flaming Bags Of Dog Poop
Date: November 12, 2025
Host(s): Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty
Producer: iHeartPodcasts
Episode Overview
This episode of Armstrong & Getty is a lively, passionate discussion focusing on widespread failures in the American education system, including declining math and writing proficiency among university students, particularly at the University of California San Diego. The hosts dive into issues of grade inflation, the fallout of pandemic-era policies, and the role of teachers unions—specifically targeting Randy Weingarten’s new book and leadership. The conversation is peppered with characteristic humor, side anecdotes, and ties to current news, including brief forays into the Jeffrey Epstein scandal, campus trends, viral Starbucks merchandise, and U.S. military maneuvers near Venezuela.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. Target's New Employee Policy Satire
[00:57 – 01:46]
- The episode opens with humorous commentary on Target's recent requirement for employees to engage with customers—highlighting both the awkwardness and potential overreach.
- Jack Armstrong: "I don't think an employee to ever be within four feet of me. That's pretty close. That's like arm's length."
- Sets the comedic tone and foreshadows deeper concerns about bureaucratic solutions to larger problems.
2. Shocking Decline in Basic Math Skills Among College Students
[02:03 – 07:57; 24:02 – 26:13]
- Deep dive into a report showing many UC San Diego students in remedial math cannot answer grade-school-level questions.
- 87 students couldn’t do first-grade math.
- Only 75% could do third-grade math; 19% could solve eighth-grade problems.
- Extended incredulity over how students "make it in" or "out" of high school and college with such gaps.
- Repeat critique of grade inflation and the abandonment of standardized testing.
- Joe Getty: "Universities in our country get 30 times more government cash than in the 50s (inflation adjusted)... For much less results."
- Causes examined:
- Dismantling of standardized tests.
- Social promotion and pandemic-related excuses.
- Admission of underprepared students for equity reasons, per California’s LCFF program.
- Jack Armstrong: "The worst thing you can do is take a kid unprepared and throw them into the shark tank of an elite university... Or give them a degree having learned nothing."
- [24:02] They share actual test questions, e.g., “Sarah had nine pennies and nine dimes. How many coins did she have?”—which only 79% got right.
- [26:13] Real examples: Valedictorians overlooked, underprepared students admitted; Chinese nationals taking spots; widespread confusion about the admissions process.
3. The Vicious Cycle of False Educational Attainment and Political Ramifications
[09:06 – 11:09; 27:18 – 28:01]
- Discusses how students with weak academic foundations—and who are pushed through by grade inflation—emerge into adulthood unprepared, blame capitalism or the system, and become susceptible to certain political movements (e.g., Zoran Mumdani).
- Joe Getty: "They think they got a college education just like their parents. Can't get a job? Must be capitalism."
- The notion of the system failing students and then scapegoating the economy/politics rather than addressing the root issues.
4. Teacher's Unions and Randy Weingarten’s Book
[12:53 – 17:06]
- Jack lampoons Weingarten’s book title, Why Fascists Fear Teachers, calling it “a flaming bag of dog crap sold as a book.”
- Critiques book’s strawman arguments (e.g., school choice conspiracies, racism allegations) and Weingarten’s pandemic-era actions.
- Discusses misleading statistics and Weingarten’s attempts at image rehab after extended school closures.
- Jack Armstrong: “If ever a flaming bag of dog crap was sold as a book, this is it.”
5. Campus Madness, Grade Inflation, and “Snowflake” Culture
[03:02 – 03:21]
- Preview of future discussion on Harvard’s grading controversy: “Everybody gets As all the time. We gotta stop that.”
- Commentary on how grade inflation undermines standards and expectations.
6. Solutions, Social Justice, and the American Dream
[28:01 – 31:31]
- Quote: “Let me offer you my definition of social justice. I keep what I earn, and you keep what you learn. Do you disagree? Then tell me how much of what I earn belongs to you and why.” — cited from Walter Williams (quoted by Thomas Sowell) [28:12]
- Advocacy for transparency about real American success stories; dispelling myths about the “rigged” nature of the U.S. economy.
- Hard work, effort, and initiative—more than privilege or inheritance—are core to most people’s success stories.
7. Miscellaneous & Notable Rift Segments
- Epstein Scandal Resurgence
[21:09 – 24:02; 42:13 – 42:26]
- Commentary on Michael Wolf’s new claims about Jeffrey Epstein and Trump, casting doubt on the credibility and timing of these revelations.
- Weariness expressed about the relentless return of the Epstein story: “If you’re listening and thinking, wow, that’s weird, I accidentally downloaded something from four months ago... No you didn’t.”
- Starbucks Bear Cup Fad
[19:32 – 21:06]
- Lighthearted segment about the viral Starbucks “bear cup”, eBay resale mania, and the hosts’ nostalgia for honey bear dispensers.
- Quote: “It’s glass! Do you drink coffee out of it? Unless you put a little sweater on him, like a koozie.”
- U.S. Military in Venezuela
[37:59 – 42:13]
- Analysis of the USS Gerald Ford’s strike group near Venezuela, Venezuela’s mobilization of 200,000 troops, and speculation on U.S. intentions.
- Jack Armstrong: “With a regime like Maduro’s, part of his concern is real. But whipping up nationalism is the greatest gift to a dictator.”
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Modern Admissions:
“How the hell did you get into the university?” — Joe Getty [04:30] -
On the Standard of a University Education:
“Churning out college graduates that were similar-ish to high school graduates in the 50s. Probably not even that.” — Joe Getty [02:55] -
On Failed Reforms & Unions:
“So you graduate—how’d you get out of high school if you can’t do first grade math?” — Jack Armstrong [11:33]“The left in the teachers unions would have us fail these kids from age 5 through 18, completely fail them... and then make it all up at age 18.” — Jack Armstrong [11:40]
“If ever a flaming bag of dog crap was sold as a book, this is it.” — Jack Armstrong [12:53; 17:21]
-
On Blame and Capitalism:
“They think they got a college education just like their parents ... and now I can’t get a job. It must be the system.” — Joe Getty [10:10] -
On “Social Justice”:
“Let me offer you my definition of social justice. I keep what I earn, and you keep what you learn. Do you disagree? Then tell me how much of what I earn belongs to you and why.” — Quoting Walter Williams [28:12] -
On the American Dream:
“It would blow up to a large extent, the ridiculous idea that the fix is in and only the privileged few white people make money.” — Jack Armstrong [29:54] -
On Effort:
“There’s nothing that takes more effort than effortlessness... If something looks effortless, there was a lot of effort behind it.” — Jack Armstrong [31:31]
Timestamps for Important Segments
| Timestamp | Topic/Segment | |---------------|---------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:57–01:46 | Target's smile policy parody | | 02:03–07:57 | UCSD’s remedial math crisis & education funding rant | | 09:06–11:09 | The two catastrophes of admitting/advancing unprepared students | | 12:53–17:06 | Randy Weingarten's book & teachers union critiques | | 19:32–21:06 | Starbucks bear cup viral story & honey bear anecdote | | 21:09–24:02 | Jeffrey Epstein, Michael Wolf, and Trump allegations | | 24:02–26:13 | Actual basic math questions UCSD students couldn't answer | | 28:01–31:31 | Social justice definition, success stories, hard work | | 37:59–42:13 | U.S. military deployment near Venezuela analysis |
Tone & Language
The episode blends pointed criticism and satirical flair, with Armstrong & Getty’s classic mix of incredulity, sarcasm, and moral outrage. The hosts often reference their own families, personal experiences, and stay grounded in anecdotal evidence while tying in national narratives.
For Listeners
If you missed the episode, this summary delivers the hosts’ urgent concerns about the state of education, their deep skepticism toward certain political and union figures, and their belief in individual responsibility and hard work—delivered with both righteous anger and trademark humor. Expect a heated, fast-paced ride skewering the status quo, seeded with both serious policy analysis and good-natured parental nostalgia.