Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: I Need A Sleep Mask For My Fish
Date: January 21, 2026
Podcast Host: iHeartPodcasts
Hosts: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty

Episode Theme & Purpose

This episode features the signature Armstrong & Getty blend of cultural commentary, sharp political critique, and humorous banter. The central themes include:

• The cultural and political fallout from high-profile leaders' actions (sports, government)
• Intense criticism of the new film adaptation of George Orwell’s Animal Farm
• Lively discussion on disruptive activism inside churches
• Reflections on modern societal phenomena like smartphone use in kids and government “make-work” agencies
• All interspersed with personal anecdotes, sharp satire, and playful absurdity

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Aging Icons and Overstaying in the Spotlight

• LeBron James’ career trajectory (00:28)
  • Jack humorously ages LeBron: “He’s in the winter of his life. He’s in his early 60s. I don’t know how old he is. He’s old.”
  • Discussion of sports careers that overextend past their prime.
  • Quote: “He did not retire this year. He sucks. And everybody's turned on him.” – Jack Armstrong (00:28)

2. Political Personalities & Davos Drama

• Treasury Secretary Scott Bezant (03:12)

  • Armstrong recounts Bezant’s aggressive outburst at a dinner, his identity as the "first openly gay Treasury Secretary" and media double standards.
  • Quote: “He had to be separated from the guy. That’s the Treasury Secretary…openly gay, by the way, but gets no credit because he’s not a Democrat.” – Jack Armstrong (02:40)
  • Bezant’s roast of Gavin Newsom at Davos (03:32)
    • "Governor Newsom…strikes me as Patrick Bateman meets Sparkle Beach Ken…may be the only Californian who knows less about economics than Kamala Harris." – Scott Bezant (03:32)
    • Critique of Newsom's economic policies, California’s high homeless rate, and budget deficit.
    • Quote: “He is too smug, too self-absorbed and too economically illiterate to know anything.” – Scott Bezant (04:12)

• Corruption in California & City Governments (06:11)

  • Joe Getty describes “make work” city agencies and the DEI industrial complex.
  • Quote: "It's graft. Graft of a sort that would make Boss Tweed blush back in the day." – Joe Getty (07:07)

3. Exotic Cuisine: Eyeballs & South African Adventures

• The hosts recall a broadcast trip to South Africa and encountering a platter of sheep/goat eyeballs (09:09).
  • Joe: "Every time I brought it up and it made me want to vomit the first time." (08:00)
  • Jack: “I need one of those sleep masks for my fish so I can enjoy this.” (11:31)
• Humorous exchange about refusing to eat food that “looks back at you” (11:08–11:37)

4. The Animal Farm Movie Fury

• Joe Getty’s outrage at the new animated Animal Farm film (12:01–16:52)
  • Trailer presents the adaptation as a critique of capitalism rather than communism.
  • Joe’s emotional reaction:
    Quote: “They have changed Animal Farm from an incredibly eloquent, persuasive critique of socialism and communism... They have changed it to a cautionary tale about how capitalism makes people do evil things.” (13:43)
  • Comparison to perverting the meaning of A Christmas Carol (16:04)
  • Joe theatrically vows protest:
    Quote: “I will be outside that theater picketing and doing interviews about what an abortion it is, what a horror it is, how it’s murdering Orwell...” (16:20)
• Jack recommends seeing it, but with tongue firmly in cheek; Joe’s “militancy will grow.”

5. Disruptive Protests in Churches & Media Narratives

• Church Disruption Incident in Minneapolis (18:23–23:41)

  • Protesters invade a church service to target the pastor for working with ICE.
    • Audio of protestors yelling: “Where are you?…What do you do to stand up for your Somali and Latino communities?” (19:28, 28:12)
  • Hosts are livid about the lack of media coverage and “intentional strategy” to provoke violence.
    • Quote: “These people are desperate to provoke a violent response.” – Joe Getty (20:06)
    • Quote: “If that came out of nowhere, I would lose my ass.” – Jack Armstrong (22:27)
  • Joe lauds the congregants’ ability to “laugh at the guy” and promote mockery over violence.

• Don Lemon’s Commentary & Race (24:47–26:10)

  • Don Lemon links protest backlash to “white supremacy,” drawing scorn from the hosts.
    • Quote: “And the only reason derision's being poured upon you, you human disease, is that you're a gay black man in America.” – Joe Getty, mockingly paraphrasing Lemon (25:29)
  • They lampoon self-righteous activism that focuses on optics and virtue signaling.

6. Satirical “Dwarves vs Female Athletes” Segment

• Debate over the results of a physical competition between strong dwarf men and female athletes.
  • Jack: “Finally this question has been answered.” (30:43)
  • Joe: “Anybody who’s watched Lord of the Rings knew that was coming.” (31:06)
• Discussion is light-hearted, poking fun at viral internet content.

7. U.S. Foreign Policy & Trump on Iran (Brief Teaser)

• Rumors of looming U.S. military action against Iran (32:02)
  • Joe: “I think this is the patient calculating side of Trump that some of us would like to see a little more of.” (32:08)

8. Smartphones, Kids, and Dopamine

• CBS report on efforts to delay children’s access to smartphones, and non-profits teaching kids about digital addiction (32:23)
  • Brain science approach has promising results: “If you teach kids this will hurt your brain, that seems to mean something to them.” – Jack Armstrong (33:20)
  • Anecdotes about life before cellphones and skepticism toward parental justifications for kids having phones.
  • 2/3 of Gen Z now intentionally unplug at intervals, indicating rising awareness (34:47).
    • Joe: “Part of the reason I’m a little more optimistic than I used to be is…almost 2/3 of Gen Z now intentionally unplug.” (34:47)
  • Nostalgia for pre-digital attention spans and public spaces.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “He’s a combination of Patrick Bateman and Sparkle Beach Ken…” – Scott Bezant on Gavin Newsom (03:32)
• “I need one of those sleep masks for my fish so I can enjoy this.” – Jack Armstrong, on eating whole cooked fish (11:31)
• “They have changed Animal Farm from an incredibly eloquent, persuasive critique of socialism and communism... They have changed it to a cautionary tale about how capitalism makes people do evil things.” – Joe Getty (13:43)
• “I would like to get Andy Serkis’s neck in my hands like Samwise Gamgee did to Gollum, and he had it coming.” – Joe Getty (16:20)
• “If that came out of nowhere, I would lose my ass.” – Jack Armstrong, on disruptive protests (22:27)
• “It's all pretense. They're all neo-Marxists, but as Marxists, going back to…Lenin…you have to get the useful idiots to buy into the pretext.” – Joe Getty (29:08)
• “Finally, this question has been answered.” – Jack Armstrong, about the viral ‘dwarves vs athletes’ competition (30:43)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• LeBron and Aging Athletes: 00:28–01:00
• Scott Bezant vs Gavin Newsom (at Davos): 02:15–05:16
• California DEI Bureaucracy Analysis: 06:11–07:34
• Eyeball Buffet Story: 09:09–11:37
• Animal Farm Movie Rant: 12:01–16:52
• Church Protest Incident & Reactions: 18:23–23:41; 28:12 for audio replay
• Don Lemon and Racial Activism Satire: 24:47–26:10
• Dwarves vs Female Athletes Debate: 30:28–31:52
• Iran Military Action Teaser: 32:01–32:23
• Smartphones, Kids, and Dopamine: 32:23–36:09

Engagement & Tone

• The episode maintains Armstrong & Getty’s trademark irreverence, skepticism, and willingness to provoke.
• Their dynamic contrasts Joe’s animated, sometimes theatrical outrage with Jack’s dry, occasionally deadpan retorts.
• Topical critiques are balanced by lighter, sometimes absurd anecdotes.

For listeners: This episode will resonate particularly strongly with fans of sharp media critique, political satire, and hands-on cultural commentary—with plenty of laughs and a willingness to tackle controversial topics.