If Anyone Pinches You, Loosen Their Teeth

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: If Anyone Pinches You, Loosen Their Teeth (March 17, 2026)

Podcast by: iHeartPodcasts
Hosts: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty

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Episode Overview

This episode covers a breaking political resignation, shifts in American attitudes toward Israel, skepticism toward St. Patrick's Day traditions, America’s changing economic energy dependencies, and several oddball crime stories. Throughout, Jack and Joe mix headline commentary with irreverent banter, offering both sharp takes and comic relief.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Air Travel Woes & Congressional Inaction

• Starts with jokes about the New York Half Marathon and U.S. airport chaos due to mass delays (01:29).
  • Jack: “Some of those scenes from airports...just the pictures from the airports with the security lines going out the door and down the street all across the country. Looks miserable to be traveling by air.” (01:46)
• Explains TSA funding crises, congressional gridlock, and political blame games (02:19).
  • Joe: “Democrats are saying we offered a bill to fund only the TSA, but they want to...completely change how [ICE] operates...So they’re using the TSA as leverage, but people aren’t getting that word.” (02:19)
  • Media perspectives diverge; MSNBC blames Republicans, Fox touches on it reluctantly" (02:57).

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2. Breaking News: US Counterterrorism Official Resigns Over “Iran War”

• Joe Kent, Director of the National Counterterrorism Center, resigns, claiming the war with Iran is due to Israeli lobbying and that Iran posed no imminent threat to the US (03:47).
  • Jack reads Kent’s statement: “Pressure from Israel had pushed President Trump into war against Iran and [Kent] can’t be part of it...It’s clear that we started this war due to pressure from Israel and its powerful American lobby.” (03:47)
  • Joe: “That is something…fairly ridiculous what he said. The idea that we’re not under any imminent threat from Iran?” (04:39)
• Hosts analyze Kent’s claim, tracing rising skepticism about Israel among both far-right MAGA voters and the left (05:02).

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3. American Attitudes Toward Israel: Poll Results & Historical Perspective

• Cites an NBC News poll: Americans’ negative views of Israel have dramatically increased across age groups since 2023 (05:02).
  • Jack: “Ages 18 to 34...from 37% [negative] to 63%. Next group, 35 to 49, it's 10 points worse. Ages 50 to 64, doubled from 15 to 30...Older crowd, 12 to 21.” (05:02)
• Joe blames youth “indoctrination” but notes rising negativity among all groups (06:15).
  • “Americans love dead Jews...sympathize when they’re being hunted...But when Jews defend themselves, everyone says, ‘Oh you’re being a bully.’” – Joe (06:26)

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4. Debate on Influence of the Israel Lobby (AIPAC)

• Counters the narrative that AIPAC has outsized control over US policy, citing relative lobbying spending (11:58).
  • Joe: “AIPAC ranked roughly 74th among domestic lobbyists...compared to the US Chamber of Commerce at 96 million, National Association of Realtors at 86 million...APAC accounts for roughly 1/10 of 1%...” (11:58)

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5. Who Is Joe Kent?

• Former Trump appointee, key advisor to Tulsi Gabbard, 11 combat deployments, Gold Star husband (15:37, 17:01).
  • His positions: critical of Israel, controversial views on Islam, believes Jan 6th arrestees are “political prisoners” (“1-6 denier”) (21:23).
  • Predicted by hosts to become a darling for anti-war media (“he’ll have his own show on MSNBC in prime time by next week” – Jack, 11:58).

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6. St. Patrick’s Day: Cultural Satire

• Jokes about traditions—pinching, wearing green, and the Americanization of a foreign holiday (25:01).
  • Joe: “There’s virtually nothing about St. Patrick’s Day that I don’t find idiotic.” (25:17)
  • Jack: “Honoring the great St. Patrick who fought the Battle of Bunker Hill, signed the Declaration of Independence, and freed the snakes...” (25:58)
  • Notes that in Ireland, it's not nearly as big a deal (26:53).

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7. America’s Decreased Oil Dependency

• Despite Persian Gulf conflict, the US economy is less sensitive to oil price hikes because it is more service- and less energy-intensive (27:58).
  • “Our economy now largely depends on services...114 million jobs in services and only 21 million in goods-producing sectors...much more oil efficient” – Joe (29:24)
  • EVs and higher gas mileage help mitigate global energy disruptions’ impact.

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8. Generalization vs. Specialization

• Worries about loss of "generalist" skills among Americans, referencing evolutionary biology (31:23).
  • Jack: “The only animals that have survived...were generalists. They could do lots of different things. Animals that are specialists don’t survive...” (31:21)

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9. Weird Crimes Segment

• Odd news of the day:
  • Man arrested in Nairobi for smuggling 2200 live garden ants out of Kenya (35:44).
    • Joe: “Investigators found 2238 ants...Who was in charge of counting them? ‘Can I investigate a murder or something?’” (36:40)
  • Head priest of Pittsburgh Episcopal Church caught stealing over $1000 in baseball cards from Walmart (37:30).
    • Jack: “That’s gotta be one of those [cases where] you’re stealing for the thrill of it...” (38:16)

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10. Quick Hits & Teasers

• Social media poll: Democrats asked who scares them more—“Allahu Akbar” shouters or “Up With Trump” (beginning of Hour 3 preview, 33:41).
• American festivals (Columbus, St. Patrick’s Day) created to win ethnic voting blocs (27:34).
• Joke about March Madness: Office winner gets a gallon of gas due to high prices (33:46).
• American jobs and the service economy: “We’re not going to defeat [China] with gym memberships.” – Joe (30:53)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

“Americans love dead Jews...But when the Jews stand up for themselves and defend themselves, everybody says, ‘Oh, you’re being a bully.’”
— Joe Getty (06:26)

“For him to say Iran was not an imminent threat is one thing. To say that we were pushed in it by Israel, that we’re dancing to Israel's tune...that’s a heck of a thing.”
— Jack Armstrong (13:00)

“There’s virtually nothing about St. Patrick’s Day that I don’t find idiotic.”
— Joe Getty (25:17)

“If anyone pinches you, loosen their teeth.”
— Joe Getty, offering advice about St. Patrick’s Day traditions (25:05)

“The only animals that have survived, evolutionary speaking, were generalists...Animals that are specialists don’t survive the same way.”
— Jack Armstrong (31:21)

“We're not going to defeat [China] with gym memberships.”
— Joe Getty on the service economy limiting America’s self-sufficiency (30:53)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Airport meltdown & gridlock – 01:29
• Announcement of Kent resignation – 03:47
• American attitudes toward Israel poll – 05:02
• Discussion of anti-Semitic tropes/AIPAC influence – 11:58
• Joe Kent’s bio & controversial stances – 15:37, 21:23
• St. Patrick’s Day skepticism & jokes – 25:01
• US oil dependency & service economy – 27:58
• Discussion on societal specialization – 31:21
• Weird crimes: ant smuggling/baseball card theft – 35:44, 37:30

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Summary

This episode navigates a swirl of grim breaking news—Joe Kent’s anti-Israel resignation and the fraught politics it triggers—while delving into American public opinion shifts, debunking Israel lobby myths, and poking fun at St. Patrick’s Day customs. Listeners also get oddball news of ant smuggling and church theft, reflections on America’s economic transformation, and the classic Armstrong & Getty blend of wit and pointed cultural critique.

Transcript

[Podcast Advertiser]

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[Jack Armstrong]

Hey, it's Howie Mandel and I am inviting you to witness history as me and my how we do it gaming team take on Gilly the King and wallow two six seven's million dollars gaming in an epic global gaming league video game showdown. Four rounds, multiple games, one winner, plus a halftime performance by multi platinum artist Travy McCoy. Watch all the action and see who wins and advances to the championship match against NIOH right now at globalgamingleague.com that's globalgamingleague.com everybody games broadcasting live from the

[Joe Getty]

Abraham Lincoln radio studio at the George Washington Broadcast Center, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty. Armstrong and Getty. And now here's Armstrong and Getty. Yesterday was the United Airlines New York

[Jack Armstrong]

City half Marathon, an annual event where

[Joe Getty]

they announce a gate change at LaGuardia five minutes before boarding. And how, how far away is our gate? 13.1 miles. I don't think we're going to make it, man.

[Jack Armstrong]

Some of those scenes from airports, even today I was looking at this morning, there had already been 2000 cancellations like as the day started and. Or delays, delays, 2000 delays as the day started. But that, that's a heck of a start. And then obviously that ripples out all across the country and then just the pictures from the airports with the security lines going out the door and down the street all across the country. Looks miserable to be traveling by air. I wonder if it's one of those deals I've been in this before where you can't rent a car either if you wanted to drive. There are just no vehicles to be had.

[Joe Getty]

No, no. I actually saw an interview with a guy last night on the news who had that very situation. And because of our, our divided media and our, our bubbles and everything, I don't sense any great pressure building on Congress to settle the Department of Homeland Security funding and fund the tsa. The Democrats are saying we offered a bill to fund only the tsa, but they want to like defund ICE or completely change how it operates or whatever. And that's just not going to happen. So they're using the TSA's leverage, but people aren't getting that word. They don't understand that people ought to be enraged over this.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, well, it was presented as completely the fault of the Republicans as I watched Morning Joe on MSNBC today. Well, there's a shock.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

So I don't know what people think about that. We do have a breaking news thing here that got rid of Ice Barbie. All right, Ice Barbie is gone.

[Joe Getty]

And what was the hard ass guy who was in Minneapolis? Not home. And the other guy, I can never think.

[Jack Armstrong]

Nazi trench coat.

[Joe Getty]

That's right. The long black trench coat reminiscent of Nazi coat. That's right. But he's retiring this month, so the house has been cleaned. Katie, the name I'm looking for is Greg Bevino. Nice job, Duncan.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow. So we do have kind of a breaking news that's going to get tongues wagging on podcasts and whatever.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, no. Because there's been so little to wag your tongue about like.

[Jack Armstrong]

A top US Counterterrorism official has resigned, citing the Iran war. Joe Kentucky announced his resignation as director of the National Counterterrorism Center. That seems like a fairly big position. He said that pressure from Israel had pushed President Trump into war against Iran and he can't be part of it. I cannot in good conscience support the ongoing war in Iran. Mr. Kent said, as the director of National Counterterrorism Center, Iran posed no imminent threat to our nation. And it is clear that we started this war due to pressure from Israel and its powerful American lobby. Man, that's tossing a grenade rhetorically into the conversation because that will be a big deal on your lefty news channels all day long. Oh, man. Well, and some of your, you know, Fox, I'll have to touch on it a little because I know the people I know that are most, the most upset about Israel directing us around were former MAGA people.

[Joe Getty]

Right. Yeah, that, that's. Wow, that is something he said. That's fairly ridiculous what he said. The idea that. When do you say we're not under any imminent threat from Iran?

[Jack Armstrong]

Right.

[Joe Getty]

Just two days away from an imminent threat for 47 years. The deaths of all those soldiers, the chokehold over the Gulf, just, you know,

[Jack Armstrong]

just since we ended up on the topic, I'll get to this poll that came out yesterday. So like I said, the people I know who believe Israel is jerking the world around and the source of all evil the most are MAGA people or former MAGA people that I personally know. And obviously a lot of the left doesn't think much of Israel, as we all know. So the views of voters about Israel, the latest poll that came out, it has gone the wrong direction for Israel by a lot. This is an NBC News poll. Every age group, the negative view of Israel, for instance, ages 18 to 34, year young crowd, it's gone from 37% of them had a negative view of Israel to 63% since 2023. This is in the last three years. This is in three years. Next group of people, 35 to 49, it's 10 points worse for Israel. Ages 50 to 64, it has doubled from 15 to 30 that have a negative view. And then for your older crowd, it went from 12 to 21. But the overall number, if you add them all together, is a lot of people with a negative view of Israel. And that didn't used to be our situation in America.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, the youngsters have been indoctrinated by lies in their schools and colleges. So that's enough of that.

[Jack Armstrong]

What about the increase in of double digits or more for every other age group?

[Joe Getty]

Well, that's where I'm going. One of the most wise things I ever heard, and I can't remember who said it, is Americans love dead Jews. They love Jews if they're dead, if they're quietly enduring being hunted and killed. We love the poor Jews and sympathize with them and would love to help them. But when the Jews stand up for themselves and defend themselves, everybody says, oh, you're, you're being a bully. How dare you do that? Those people weren't a threat to you. It's ridiculous.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's kind of interesting because, like, Israel

[Joe Getty]

has more respect from me now. More because they finally just said, woken up and decided, no, getting along with radical Islam ain't working. We're going to kill them instead.

[Jack Armstrong]

So I know someone who is really worried about a draft coming and has already made plans to get their teenage sons out of the country. The draft comes because they don't want their kids dying for Israel. This is someone who voted Trump three times in a row. I don't know how many people that represents, but based on my floating around Twitter, it's a chunk of people. I still don't know how many people it is, though. I don't know if it's 3% of the population or 13 or 23.

[Joe Getty]

But yes, I know. You know, Twitter isn't America.

[Jack Armstrong]

No, that's why I said I don't know if it's 3 or 23.

[Joe Getty]

Right. Yeah. I haven't run into a single human who brought up anything close to that in real life.

[Jack Armstrong]

The people that follow Tucker and Candace in big numbers. So how many people is that? I wish I knew enough to make them a freaking bum load of money,

[Joe Getty]

I'll tell you that. No, that's true.

[Jack Armstrong]

But was I gonna say. Oh yeah. So to your point about the whole. Love dead Jews, just not currently living Jews. Because when a movie like a Schindler's List or something like that comes along, oh man, the weeping and the Hollywood and all the awards and everything. And how awful it was for the Nazis and Auschwitz and this and that and everything like that. Preferably Jews currently alive under attack either on college campuses being beaten down so you can't go to class at UCLA or you know, attacks in Israel, whatever the hell. Yeah. No sympathy for that. That's interesting.

[Joe Getty]

No, no movies about when every country in the region, every Muslim country in the region attacked Israel back in the day and Israel whooped their ass. It's one of the great stories in the history of mankind. No, no movies about that. We like him dead.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, you're right. There's never been a great Six Day War movie.

[Joe Getty]

Nope.

[Jack Armstrong]

But if I just. On a practical matter, whether it's right or wrong, if I'm Israel, I gotta figure out how to turn that opinion around in the United States. Cause that's gonna, that's the. You know that younger crowd is gonna end up in government. You're gonna have a House of Representatives full of people that aren't interested in sending three to five billion dollars to Israel every year in our best planes and all that sort of stuff. I don't know how they negotiate that.

[Joe Getty]

I don't have the figures in front of me. But the money that AIPAC spends lobbying is a tin of other industries and countries for that matter. That whole APAC runs the. That is based on nothing. It's just a fantasy of the evil controlling Jew behind the scene. That's. I. I just don't get it.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, this guy I'd never heard of before. Joe Kent, Top counterterrorism. So some places say the top counterterrorism official. Other places say a top counterterrorism official. I'd like to know which it is.

[Joe Getty]

There's a big difference.

[Jack Armstrong]

But in what.

[Joe Getty]

What agency? Exactly. Let me bring that back up again

[Jack Armstrong]

since this is important. He is the director of the National Counterterrorism center which was put together after 9 11. It's a pretty big position.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

And he appointed, I assume by, you know, people in, in the Trump administration recommended him because they thought he was on board with the sort of things Trump wants to do. Has specifically said, I cannot in good conscience support the ongoing war in Iran. Iran posed no imminent threat to our nation. And it's clear that we started this war due to pressure from Israel and its powerful American lobby. I mean, it's now exploding all over media, every news site and cable channels on this story. Now it's going to be a big story today and maybe for the rest of this war.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, he might be a career guy as opposed to a political appointee. I don't know. I wouldn't assume that he was Trump approved and appointed.

[Jack Armstrong]

No, I have to look into that.

[Joe Getty]

I mean, because his statement is so unequivocally from one point of view as opposed to any nuance. I'm suspicious.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, let me go on. As a veteran who deployed to combat 11 times and as a gold star husband who lost my beloved wife Shannon in a war manufactured by Israel, I cannot support standing sending the next generation off to fight and die in a war that serves no benefit to the American people nor justifies the cost of American lives. That's some pretty strong talk.

[Joe Getty]

So what, what war was he referring to that was started by Israel, that

[Jack Armstrong]

he's a veteran of? The Iraq war, Kent said started by Israel. I have to read this in full comment. We'll get to this when we come back. This is going to be a giant news story today, particularly for the war hating media. This guy also is a good looking guy with great hair. He will have his own show on MSNBC in prime time by next week.

[Joe Getty]

In 2024, AIPAC ranked roughly 74th among domestic lobbyists spending around $3.5 million. Compare that to the U.S. chamber of Commerce at 96 million. National association of Realtors at 86 million. No wars for realtors. Big Pharma at 60 million or Amazon at 50 million. Out of the top 100 lobbying organizations in Washington, APAC accounts for roughly 1/10 of 1% of total total lobbying spend. Election spending is included. It represents about half of 1% of political money nationwide.

[Jack Armstrong]

That is good information to have at your fingertips because that is going to be a topic for today and maybe several coming days. We'll get more quotes from this guy. I think this is going to be

[Joe Getty]

a big deal in 2024. Ideal in facts, Jack. Japan spent roughly 50 million. Saudi Arabia 44 million. China 30 million, South Korea 27 million. Qatar nearly 19 million and Israel total about 14 million.

[Jack Armstrong]

For him to say Iran was not an imminent threat. Is one thing to say that we were pushed in it to by Israel. That Israel. We're dancing to Israel's tune. That's a heck of a thing to say.

[Joe Getty]

I'd say. Wow. It's. Well, yeah, it's unsupportable too in my opinion.

[Jack Armstrong]

We got a little more on that. Various quotes that are floating around from this guy. He's going to be the bell of the ball for the war hating media, I'll tell you that. Stay with us. Our text line is 415295KFTC Armstrong and

[Joe Getty]

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[Jack Armstrong]

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[Jack Armstrong]

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[Jack Armstrong]

Who is Joe Kent? Might as well tell you since he's gonna be in the news a lot today. He is the head of the Counterterrorism center appointed By Donald Trump, 45 year old politician who ran for Congress in Washington as an ultra MAGA guy. He served with Tulsi Gabbard, which gives you a hint as to some things about his thinking.

[Joe Getty]

Top advisor to her for some time.

[Jack Armstrong]

He got appointed as the head of the Counterterrorism center by Trump when Trump became president, got confirmed by the Congress with 52 votes and he's been running that thing for a while. He's been Trump's top advisor about all counterterrorism things and he has just resigned saying he cannot be part of this war anymore. We'll give you the actual quote, it's I cannot in good conscience support the ongoing war in Iran. Iran posed no imminent threat to our nation and it's clear that we started this war due to pressure from Israel and its powerful American lobby. That is the bomb that also blames

[Joe Getty]

Israel for the loss of his wife in Syria.

[Jack Armstrong]

At some point she was killed by a suicide bomber. Probably Iran had some hand in the bombing equipment or training or making or

[Joe Getty]

whatever because they did all of that part of the world.

[Jack Armstrong]

This guy is absolutely the perfect person for the hating this war media which is definitely MSNBC and a lot of cnn. Cuz he's got this. He served in the army for 20 years, 11 combat deployments leading counterterrorism and irregular warfare operations, receiving Numerous commendations including six Bronze Stars. Served with the 75th Ranger Regiment, Army Special Forces, US Army Special Operations. Served as a paramilitary officer in the CIA Special Activity Center. I mean he has got the resume that they want for this sort of thing to portray, you know, this as, you know, us doing Israel's bidding, which they've been hinting at and, or saying out loud depending on who you're talking to on a lot of these cable channels since the war started. Now they're really going to say it out loud.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, evidently. According to the New York Times, while being a key advisor to Tulsi, he's been a voice advocating inside the administration consistently for a more restrained foreign policy. He's of that bent.

[Jack Armstrong]

I cannot support sending the next generation off to fight and die in a war that serves no benefit to the American people nor justifies the cost of American lives.

[Joe Getty]

I would love to talk to him.

[Jack Armstrong]

So would I.

[Joe Getty]

In what sense is removing the or disempowering the regime in Iran not helping the American people given their history? Or he might be one of those guys who said we just. Who say we got to get out of the Middle east completely just ignore it. Let them kill each other. It has nothing to do with us. Doesn't matter that we have an ally there in Israel. The tail's wagging the dog. I think he would. He would probably say something like that

[Jack Armstrong]

it wouldn't matter if Iran got a nuclear weapon.

[Joe Getty]

I know. I'm mystified by his arguments. I think they're terrible. With all due respect to his service and the sacrifices he's made. But you know the best. You know what's a good metaphor? The most heroic cop on the streets doesn't necessarily know how to run a department or the entire City.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. Mr. Kent had been a key advisor to Tulsi Gabbard, the Director of National Intelligence, who is a whack job, in my opinion and has been a voice advocating inside the administration. Okay. What was that video Tulsi put out? Remember that video she put out that basically stating that we were the bad guys for using nuclear weapons in World War II? Right around the anniversary and then she kind of disappeared from the scene there has. She hasn't been played really much of a role since.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. She was put way at the end of the bench after that. Yeah. Apologized for America's use of atomic weapons.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. And I'm predicting right now this guy, because he looks like a TV guy, he's going to have a show on msnbc, have a great life, make lots of money criticizing everything.

[Joe Getty]

I wish him well. He sacrificed a lot for the country. He's wrong about this, but I wish him well. And go broadcast to 100,000 people.

[Jack Armstrong]

Have fun. Any thoughts on this story? Text us more on the way. Stay here.

[Joe Getty]

Armstrong and Getty

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[Jack Armstrong]

the timing of this while we're on the air because it started the hour with me talking about people I know the most, MAGA people I know hate this war and think Israel is directing everything and pushed us into it. And you got the crowd that hates Israel, you know, your left crowd, the college campus and all of Hollywood and all that. And then so I just, it's hard to figure out how big these crowds are. Well then, you know, moments after we were talking about that, this guy, Joe Kent, who I'd never heard of, who's the director of the National Counterterrorism center, he just resigned. He was a Trump appointee. He just resigned saying that Israel forced into this in the war and I can't be part of it, more or less is what he said. Just a little bit background on this Joe Kent. First of all, his position on Islam was controversial, I guess during his confirmation hearing. But I liked Kent's views on Islamic terrorism were controversial. During his Senate confirmation debate, Democratic senators cited his past statement that Islam is based on conquest at its core. So he has a pretty hard eyed view of what Islam is, but he believes Israel is jerking us around and forcing us into wars. Also, he believed that the January 6, the people that got arrested around January 6 were political prisoners being held by their own government, that the CIA and FBI was involved in the January 6 thing. They created the whole deal. He's one of those people.

[Joe Getty]

Oh boy.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow.

[Joe Getty]

So he's a Tulsi Gabbard tied 1-6-denier. And you think they're going to get all warm and cuddly over on MSNBC for this guy and the big Alphabet networks. They'll probably ignore that part of his resume.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's that whole, what do we call it, the NATO of grievances or whatever, you know, the overlapping, which one ranks at the top. I think the fact that he is currently mostly known for being against the war and Trump and claiming Israel forced us into it, I think that that'll be the. They'll ignore that other stuff for a while.

[Joe Getty]

Right. But that's just so cute. So cute. It's interesting. I was trying to dig into more of APAC spending and lobbying and that sort of thing because it's such a, such a talking point among anti Semites at either end of the horseshoe. And it is amazing because there are all sorts of, you know, sources for information on lobbying and You've got, you know, Qatar, for instance, spends hundreds of millions of dollars, hundreds of millions to billions of dollars to US Universities and think tanks trying to warm up our young people for their thinking in their thinking about the Muslim Brotherhood, for instance, and Qatar itself and blah, blah, blah. Nobody talks about that. That practically nobody. I do a little bit. But. But there are all sorts of pro and con APAC sites just absolutely fixated on the Jews and how they're spending money and how they control everybody.

[Jack Armstrong]

Nothing on this.

[Joe Getty]

These other people who spend, you know, hundreds of millions of dollars. It's just interesting.

[Jack Armstrong]

I'd say.

[Joe Getty]

I think it's just flaming anti Semitism, honestly. But anyway, I don't know. I can't fix humankind. I don't like. I don't like humans very much. Coming up. Weird. What was I going to call this weird crime? A couple of really, really odd crimes that have been committed lately.

[Jack Armstrong]

Has anybody pinched Michael for not wearing green today?

[Joe Getty]

No, I haven't gotten pinched yet. We have so few people now.

[Jack Armstrong]

Sure. There aren't enough people around to pinch

[Joe Getty]

you and have to be a human or a crab. Michael. Anybody pinches, you, loosen their teeth. All right.

[Jack Armstrong]

Not a fan of the tradition of pinching people who don't wear green on your day. You're Irish.

[Joe Getty]

There's virtually nothing about St. Patrick's Day that I don't find idiotic. I would have to think for a while about it to see if there's anything. Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

You won't drink green beer and gives me migraines.

[Joe Getty]

The food die.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I don't appreciate migraines too. Yeah, fun.

[Joe Getty]

I don't appreciate halfwood. I don't appreciate half wits. Present company not accepted. Who take some obscure Irish holiday as an excuse to drink like idiots and carry on.

[Jack Armstrong]

Man, I've had some fun St. Patrick's Days in my life. Me too.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, great, great.

[Jack Armstrong]

Honoring the great St. Patrick who fought the battle of Bunker Bunker Hill, signed the Declaration of Independence and freed the

[Joe Getty]

snakes from involuntary servitude or something.

[Jack Armstrong]

Invented electricity or something. I don't know what he did.

[Joe Getty]

That was it. I think that's it. Yeah, it was. It was kind of funny. The. The prime minister, in effect, of Ireland was meeting with Trump and he's meeting with him again today and presenting. Well, why don't we just go ahead and play 26, Michael.

[Jack Armstrong]

He welcomes the leader of Ireland to the White house to mark St. Patrick's Day.

[Joe Getty]

In addition to a special lunch up

[Jack Armstrong]

on Capitol Hill from Ireland, the president will be presented With a bowl of shamrocks. The White House going all in on this holiday. We'll see if the President brings out his Green Tide.

[Joe Getty]

And I could read in the Prime Minister, the Taoiseach's eyes, you people make a way bigger deal of this than we do.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's not a thing in. It's not a thing in Ireland, it's

[Joe Getty]

definitely a different thing. But I don't know. It's one of those facts I've learned half a dozen times in my life and forgotten again because it's not interesting

[Jack Armstrong]

enough to retain definition of holiday. I'm going to ask the definition of holiday for

[Joe Getty]

depends if you're in the US Or Britain. It means a vacation.

[Jack Armstrong]

In Britain, the term holiday generally refers to a day set aside by customer law on which normal activities such as business or work are suspended or reduced. Does that fit for what we're doing? Because I got just referred to it as a holiday. I don't think St. Patrick's Day is a holiday.

[Joe Getty]

No, definition's a little limited.

[Jack Armstrong]

Does anybody get work off for St. Patrick's Day?

[Joe Getty]

Okay, well, no.

[Jack Armstrong]

And so you tell us this every year, and I find this interesting that Columbus Day and St. Patrick's Day both were. They were just tipping the cap to various groups to get their votes.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, yeah. It was purely an effort to get the Irish vote, as was Columbus Day. Yeah. To get the Italian vote in New York City and then beyond and then long after.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's necessary. It lives for some reason.

[Joe Getty]

Well, because it's. In the case of St. Patrick's Day, it's a good party. I have never had a Columbus Day party. Good, bad or indifferent.

[Jack Armstrong]

And then we teach our kids that leprechauns come into the house at night and urinate in the toilet and leave candy. Once again, candy. All right, I think. Never mind.

[Joe Getty]

Apac.

[Jack Armstrong]

Kid.

[Joe Getty]

The kid lobby controls a lot of what happens.

[Jack Armstrong]

Happens in America. The candy lobby.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, yeah, yeah, that too. That too. I found this interesting, somewhat tangential to the big war. War with Iran is frozen. Commerce in the Persian Gulf boosted oil prices by more than 50% worldwide, translating almost immediately into a higher gasoline costs, blah, blah, blah. And yet in the United States, the impact is much more muted than it would have been a few decades ago. That's because we Americans use less energy per unit of economic outp than we used to. In fact, a lot less. In economists speak, we're less energy intensive. Intensive for a few reasons. Number one, our economy now largely depends on services like health care, retail, entertainment. We found out earlier today, for the first time ever, there is more retail space rented out for services like gyms and spas than stores that sell stuff in America. But they all require less energy than manufacturing industries. There are only about 21 million jobs in goods producing sectors while private services employs 114,000,114 to 21. And we've become so much more oil efficient, energy efficient than we used to be in the 1970s. For instance, according to the Department of Transportation, the average new light duty vehicle gets 28 miles per gallon. That's up from 13 miles per gallon in 1975. Then you got your EVs are a factor as well. And so long story short, the nobody

[Jack Armstrong]

in my memory of it, nobody even knew what your mileage was because nobody cared because gas was so cheap. I mean when I first started buying gas and I'm not 100 years old, it was like 80 cents a gallon or something where I lived.

[Joe Getty]

Right, right. Economists at Wells Fargo estimate that a sustained 50% rise in oil prices similar to the current SIT situation would have had about twice the effect in the 80s as it is having today.

[Jack Armstrong]

Don't doubt that a bit.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, just thought that was at least mildly interesting. Come on.

[Jack Armstrong]

Coming up, weird crime, that stuff about the service economy. So we don't. It's not mostly people like shuffling papers around, as people often dismissively say. Just a lot of people shuffling papers around, not like actually making something.

[Joe Getty]

Right, yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

That good?

[Joe Getty]

It depends. Are we in a war with China?

[Jack Armstrong]

It's not good, right?

[Joe Getty]

We're not going to defeat them with gym memberships. Okay, well.

[Jack Armstrong]

Or just our ability to shuffle papers

[Joe Getty]

around, we can give them paper cuts, right? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, we just are all a bunch of service providers that sell services to each other. In the classic economic illustration, the you spend a dollar in the bar, the bartender goes and pays the barber who you owe, the barber pays the front desk of the hotel and the hotel, blah blah, blah.

[Jack Armstrong]

I thought this was interesting.

[Joe Getty]

Nothing's being made, it's just money being traded.

[Jack Armstrong]

My 14 year old is super into evolution stuff and everything. He wants to be like a paleontologist or something someday. But he is talking about the reason human beings are going to die out is because we became specialists. The only animals that have survived, evolutionary speaking throughout history were generalists. They could do lots and lots of different things. Animals that are specialists don't survive the same way. So. And I suppose that's true to a certain extent that back in the day a lot of, you know, and probably mostly men just because the way we structured families today, you know, could build a house, fix a vehicle, grow a crop, all kinds of different things.

[Joe Getty]

Kill a deer, field dress it and cook it up.

[Jack Armstrong]

She just kind of had to be a general, I can survive in the world as opposed to. I have one particular niche, talent for shuffling papers, around, which, you know, I don't know if the animal world applies to us or not, but I thought that was interesting.

[Joe Getty]

That is an interesting point. I mean, if there were some sort of apocalypse and we were rendered, you know, had to go back to the land, as it were, like there was no choice, what am I going to do? Wander around asking if people would like a commentary on the news in exchange for a crust of bread or something like that? No, it's not going to happen.

[Jack Armstrong]

You want a mildly interesting take on something that happened yesterday?

[Joe Getty]

I'm fascinating, sir. Have you ever listened to this show?

[Jack Armstrong]

Talking about myself.

[Joe Getty]

Bastard. Oh, I see. I'm sorry I attacked you.

[Jack Armstrong]

I have anger problems.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. So seriously, the weird crimes thing is worth staying tuned for. It's just absolutely bizarre. I also want to get into everywhere around the world. People around the world. I missed the Dennis Rodman clips. Those are so good. People around the world, like, everywhere, in all sorts of different societies, government systems, belief structures. They're all trying to get their kids off social media everywhere around the world.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, and for good reason.

[Joe Getty]

There's no upside.

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay, we got. Tell me about it. We got that. A whole bunch of other stuff on the way. Stay here.

[Joe Getty]

Armstrong and Getty

[Jack Armstrong]

March Madness kicks off this week, and I read that 100

[Joe Getty]

million brackets are expected to be filled out.

[Jack Armstrong]

Ooh.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, we actually have an office pool here, and the stakes are pretty high this year.

[Jack Armstrong]

The winner gets one gallon of gas. Gas is expensive. So coming up, we got this young lady who gets popular on social media for going around asking people questions. She's asking a bunch of Democrats. Which do you find more frightening? Somebody yelling Aloha Akbar or somebody yelling up with Trump, Basically. And I'm sure you know what the results are going to be, or we wouldn't be playing this. It's stunning, though. It's unbelievable. It's un. Freaking believable. Wait, it's disturbing. It is disturbing. People are so stupid. It's not just the political views. People are so ignorant. We'll get to that. Beginning of hour three.

[Joe Getty]

On a lighter note, congratulations to EJ in San Diego. It's our funny listener email of the day. Michael, congratulations. I thought. I thought it was going to be the fan. Yeah. No, no, not that one. Yes, that's a fanfare.

[Jack Armstrong]

Sure.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, it's ruined. Anyway, he says, damn it. We now have. It's about weird beard junior. Damn it. We have a gay disabled Iranian as an anti Trump foil. You know, weird beard story will be made into a musical and win all the Oscars next year. A gay disabled victim of Trump.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, that's pretty good. Wow. Wow.

[Joe Getty]

That is pretty funny. All right. Weird crime. Chinese national has been apprehended at Nairobi's main airport after being found with more than 2200. Anybody can guess more than 2200 of something in his luggage.

[Jack Armstrong]

Some sort of reptile, an insect, bird.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, Katie, wait a minute. 2200 live garden ants in his luggage?

[Jack Armstrong]

On purpose?

[Joe Getty]

The 27 year old? Yeah,

[Jack Armstrong]

I transported bedbugs once, but it wasn't on purpose.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, my God. We overnighted at the Oakland Airport hotel right next to it. I think it's been closed because of all of the junkies and crime now, but because we had a super easy flight with the kids and we left a pizza box in the room and when we woke up, it was the ant pocalypse. It was nightmare inducing. Horrifying. Anyway, this 27 year old Chinese national arrested at the Kenya airport, highlighting a growing trend of insect smuggling in Kenya. The illicit trade caters to enthusiasts who pay significant sums to cultivate ant colonies in specialized transparent enclosures known as formicariums. Blah, blah, blah.

[Jack Armstrong]

So like ant farms? Ant farm. Like we had as kids?

[Joe Getty]

Exactly. Yeah. Big elaborate ones that are hot in Asia, I guess. Investigators said a search of the Gentleman's luggage recovered 22, 38 ants. Who was in charge of counting them on? Can I investigate a murder or something?

[Podcast Advertiser]

How do you count that many ants?

[Jack Armstrong]

20, 32, 2033.

[Joe Getty]

Ah, crap.

[Jack Armstrong]

They keep going.

[Joe Getty]

Count them twice to make sure it's accurate in test tubes and the rest in three rolls of soft tissue, papers, etc. One more weird crime for you. This one. This is something else. Headline is close. That stupid ad. Get off of my screen. Head priest of Episcopal Church in Pittsburgh accused of stealing baseball cards from Walmart.

[Jack Armstrong]

Headline number one.

[Joe Getty]

Evidently they still sell baseball cards in stores. I didn't know that.

[Jack Armstrong]

My son's into them.

[Joe Getty]

The head priest and dean of Trinity Episcopal Cathedral in downtown Pittsburgh is facing charges after being accused of stealing more than $1,000 in baseball cards from Walmart. The very Reverend Aiden Smith, arrested just after leaving the store outside Pittsburgh with 27 packs of baseball cards concealed under his clothing and in a cardboard box. According to court records, police responded to a call from Walmart security who told him, hey, this guy comes in and steals baseball cards and he's here again and we think he's going to steal some more. And they watched him. Sure enough, security video shows he went right back to the baseball card display. It's still a bunch that's got almost

[Jack Armstrong]

got to be one of those you're stealing for the thrill of it as opposed to the you couldn't afford it, right?

[Joe Getty]

I have no idea. But it's always baseball cards with this guy. Is he some sort of arrested development case and he's trapped in his 11 year old consciousness or something?

[Jack Armstrong]

I knew somebody once who told me a story and I'd known them for a long time and wrote that they went through a period when they were in their 20s where they stole stuff for the thrill of it. I've never had that. I wouldn't get an enjoyable thrill out of it. But that's what motivated them.

[Joe Getty]

No, they didn't need.

[Jack Armstrong]

They get steal stuff they didn't need or could easily afford. Just it was the thrill.

[Joe Getty]

I get it. Same reason you ride your motorcycle fast or people mountain bike or whatever you want to feel on the edge. Maybe get a a mountain bike instead of stealing.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. And there's not really a victim. There's other examples you have or get in ant smuggling.

[Joe Getty]

At least at the end of the day somebody's got a lovely ant colony.

[Jack Armstrong]

Okay. So they ask some and it's a lot of like college girls too. They ask him what's scary. Radical Muslims or Trump supporters basically is what they ask him and just their answers. Oh my God. To kick off our three if you don't get it, get the podcast Armstrong and Getty on demand.

[Joe Getty]

Armstrong and Gettysburg.