Armstrong & Getty On Demand
Episode: "I'll Take The Mating Over Being Devoured"
Original Air Date: January 20, 2026
Episode Overview
This episode of Armstrong & Getty features Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty in their usual irreverent style, discussing the political chaos surrounding Trump’s renewed interest in Greenland, the state of global leadership at Davos, and the mysterious global decline in birth rates. They also touch on the controversy around LeBron James’ new sneakers commemorating the site of Martin Luther King Jr.'s assassination, and end with lighter banter on sports, masculinity, and the Internet. Listeners are treated to both biting satire and thoughtful, if somewhat off-the-cuff, cultural analysis.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Trump, Greenland, and Global Diplomatic Chaos
Timestamps: 02:52–16:18
- Trump’s Heated Greenland Rhetoric: The episode opens with discussions of Trump’s provocative stance on Greenland, his historical references, and the resulting diplomatic confusion among European allies.
- Armstrong reflects on Trump’s statement that just because a boat from Denmark landed there 500 years ago doesn’t mean they keep it forever. (03:32)
- Trump reportedly dismissed peace talks with Norway’s leader, insisting, "You didn’t give me the Nobel Prize, so I no longer care about peace." (03:40)
- International Reactions and Satire: Macron’s speech at Davos in sunglasses is lampooned, as are Macron’s “extra long sideburns.”
- “He’s in a Steve McQueen phase. Let him go through it.” – Getty (04:55)
- Strategy of Exhaustion: Referencing analyst Kevin Williamson, Getty discusses “Trump exhaustion as a strategy” — flood the field, confuse and exhaust opponents until they accept any deal just to end the chaos.
- “He floods the field, confuses people, exhausts them...freaks them out with, ‘You didn’t give me the Nobel, so I’m stealing Greenland.’” – Getty (05:13)
- Uncertainty in NATO and European Security: The cohosts debate whether Europe’s recent troop deployments to Greenland are meant as a stand against Russia/China or the U.S. under Trump. Armstrong is stunned and says, "The fact that there could be any confusion...is a sign of the times." (07:54)
- Absurdity Reaches the White House: Wall Street Journal report notes U.S. officials having to reassure European counterparts, "There are currently no military plans to take over Greenland," which Armstrong and Getty ridicule as a sign of global instability (08:25).
2. Chaos as Power—Davos and Leadership Archetypes
Timestamps: 09:33–12:57
- Drawing from Game of Thrones ("chaos is a ladder"), the hosts describe Trump and Gavin Newsom as actors who use chaos as an opportunity.
- “The tussled haired reptile who runs California into the ground...trying to shine up his reputation as a statesman.” – Getty on Newsom (10:30)
- Getty lampoons Newsom’s analogy: "He’s a T. Rex. You mate with him or he devours you." (10:54)
- Armstrong: “Well, you just said you got the option of mate with them or get devoured. I figure you might as well take the mate. I’d take the mating over being devoured.” (11:22, the title quote)
3. Greenland: Local Sentiment and Colonial History
Timestamps: 11:39–12:16
- Armstrong highlights a New York Post article featuring Greenlanders angry at Danish rule: "They take our land, our children, our lives and expect thanks. So not everybody's happy with the Danish rule." (12:16)
- Getty: “That’s why you come on to him with a little sweet talk and you don’t slap them around like Trump is doing.”
4. Political Theatre: U.S. vs. Europe Rhetoric
Timestamps: 12:57–14:47
- Satirical takes about how leaders posture on the world stage.
- “Did he do a BJ joke with all the world leaders?” – Armstrong (13:15)
- “The governor of a single American state...is now lecturing all the world leaders on toughness.” – Getty on Newsom’s posturing (13:39)
- Prediction of the week: Trump’s wild speech at Davos, with Newsom poised to make a big play for global attention (14:12).
5. Will Sanity Return to Diplomacy?
Timestamps: 14:47–16:18
- Discussion about whether leaders will revert to diplomatic language or keep acting provocatively for attention.
- Getty: “The chaos, ugliness, threats thing is not sustainable. Even Trump will sense that.” (14:57)
- Exploration of a hypothetical U.S. invasion of Greenland and whether U.S. military commanders would resign in protest (15:33).
6. LeBron James’ MLK Assassination Site Shoes Controversy
Timestamps: 20:13–23:24
- Armstrong reacts to LeBron’s commemorative shoes: "A shoe commemorating where King was assassinated. The hotel, which is now a museum, had no idea this is coming out...the idea misses the mark and it's just troubling." (21:57)
- Getty darkly jokes: “Lincoln comfortable theater seat or...Abraham Lincoln bulletproof hairpiece. I don't even know.” (23:10)
7. China’s Birth Collapse & The Global Fertility Crisis
Timestamps: 27:55–36:47
- Armstrong brings up a demographic analysis on China's unprecedented drop in births, with China's 2025 births falling over 1.6 million from the previous year, and fertility rates down to 0.93.
- “Best case scenario, in a generation they'll have 600 million people...but it's unlikely they will.” – Armstrong (29:55)
- The hosts riff on "the coyote factor" — how animals replenish more when threatened, and speculate whether humans have an inverse instinct.
- “Is it possible human beings have something similar, too?...Let’s throttle her back a little bit.” – Getty (32:29)
- Armstrong: "Can we get away from the conversation...people are too selfish or microplastics or women are too liberal...We decided as a species, we had more than enough of us, and then we went into retracted gear." (32:54)
- Getty muses on “the coyote theory” as a good science fiction title and theorizes about population self-regulation.
- They debate the impact of mass childlessness on politics and social outlook: “We will have a very even more live for today style of politics...as opposed to look, we've got to invest in the future.” – Getty (40:06)
8. Generational and Gender Trends
Timestamps: 36:47–40:27
- Armstrong and Katie discuss changing gender dynamics and the rise of IVF, as some women decide to have children on their own, citing a lack of "real men" (39:28).
- Speculation on the implications for schools, future planning, and societal priorities as fewer people have children (40:06).
9. Anti-ICE Protest Disrupts Church: Free Speech vs. Decency
Timestamps: 43:41–46:23
- Armstrong & Getty strongly condemn an anti-ICE protest that disrupted a church service in Minneapolis.
- Audio clip of the pastor defending the right to worship (44:43).
- Getty: “Don Lemon, he doesn’t have a disease. He is a disease. He is an infected sore on the height of mankind, in my opinion.” (43:58)
- “You are a piece of garbage, Don Lemon.” (46:23)
10. Final Thoughts & Signature Banter
Timestamps: 46:23–end
- Wrap-up banter includes:
- Armstrong on the perils of teenage boys discovering cologne (47:04)
- Getty: “If I could be assured that the only ass beatens were righteous ass beatons, I'd call for more ass beatons.” (47:17)
- Reflection on the workday and outro.
Notable Quotes
- On international turbulence:
“The fact that there could be any confusion...is a sign of the times.” – Armstrong (07:54) - On Trump’s approach:
“He floods the field, confuses people, exhausts them...freaks them out with, ‘You didn’t give me the Nobel, so I’m stealing Greenland.’” – Getty (05:13) - On Newsom vs. Trump:
“He's a T. Rex. You mate with him or he devours you. One or the other...” – Getty (10:54)
“I’d take the mating over the being devoured.” – Armstrong, episode title (11:22) - On global birth collapse:
“We decided as a species, we had more than enough of us, and then we went into retracted gear.” – Armstrong (32:54) - On LeBron’s shoes:
“A shoe commemorating where King was assassinated...it’s just for profit. The idea misses the mark and it’s just troubling.” – Armstrong (21:57) - On Don Lemon:
“He is an infected sore on the height of mankind, in my opinion. … You are a piece of garbage, Don Lemon.” – Getty (43:58, 46:23)
Memorable Moments
- Satirizing Emmanuel Macron’s sunglasses and haircut at Davos (04:55)
- Getty’s “coyote theory” of human reproduction and its comedic extrapolation (33:35)
- Metaphorical jabs about political leaders “mating or being devoured” by Trump (10:54, 11:22)
- Mocking LeBron’s shoes as akin to “Abraham Lincoln bulletproof hairpiece” (23:10)
- Banter about the future of humanity as everyone stops having babies (36:07–36:47)
Important Segment Timestamps
- Greenland/Trump Diplomatic Chaos: 02:52–16:18
- Chaos in Leadership/Davos: 09:33–12:57
- China’s Birth Collapse & Theories: 27:55–36:47
- Childlessness & IVF: 36:47–40:27
- Anti-ICE Protest/Don Lemon Rant: 43:41–46:23
Summary Takeaway
Armstrong & Getty tackle world politics and culture with sharp parody and skepticism, focusing on the absurdities of international crises—particularly Trump, Greenland, and Davos. They raise genuinely thought-provoking questions about why global birthrates are collapsing, speculate (half-seriously, half-comically) about instinctual species responses, and highlight the societal impact of mass childlessness. Interwoven with humor, irreverence, and mock outrage, the episode delivers insight into both the gravity and comic relief of current events.
