Not a Plan, But a Designation

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: Not a Plan, But a Designation
Date: January 21, 2026
Podcast: Armstrong & Getty On Demand (iHeartPodcasts)

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Episode Overview

In this lively “One More Thing” segment, Armstrong & Getty take a deep dive into Air Force One, sparked by recent news of a presidential flight’s abrupt turnaround due to an “electrical problem.” The hosts examine common misconceptions about Air Force One, discuss the aging nature of the presidential fleet, explore the remarkable (and sometimes outdated) technology aboard, and riff humorously about presidential and commercial air travel—especially the trials of using airplane restrooms.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. What Is Air Force One? (00:00–00:46)

• The hosts clarify a frequent misconception: “It's not a plan, it's a designation.” (A, 00:03)
  • Any plane carrying the President is designated as “Air Force One.” Helicopters are “Marine One.”
  • Even a dirigible or unconventional aircraft would assume the Air Force One call sign if the President were aboard.
• Quote:
  • “You can't fly in a designation, you idiot. So any plane can be Air Force One. It's just whatever plane the president is on is designated Air Force One.” —Host A (00:13)

2. Presidential Flight Turnaround: News & Skepticism (00:46–02:08)

• Recent incident: Presidential plane headed to Switzerland turned back due to an electrical issue.
• Skepticism arises because Air Force One is believed to have extensive backup systems.
  • Some experts and the public doubt that a single electrical issue would cause a full turnaround.
  • Quote:
    • “They've got like so many redundant backup systems…likely that you would just turn around for an electric problem? You just switch to the backup, to the backup, to the backup and keep going.” —Host B (01:02)
  • Touches on official explanations possibly being cover stories.

3. Aging Aircraft and Fleet Condition (02:09–03:48)

• Guest Josh Rogan notes that fleet issues are “an open secret” among White House reporters.
  • Air Force One is old but still in better shape than planes for other senior officials.
  • The US government is known to keep its VIP fleets long past their technological peak; current Air Force One is over 35 years old.
  • Quote:
    • “The US fleet is very old and the planes are not in good condition.” —Josh Rogan (02:44)
  • Discussion of presidential aircraft upgrades being behind schedule, highlighting inefficiencies.

4. Air Force One as Icon & Museum Piece (03:48–04:52)

• Personal anecdotes: Hosts reflect on never having toured the Air Force One exhibit at the Reagan Library (B), visiting airplane museums (A), seeing vintage Air Force Ones (such as Nixon’s).
• Early Air Force One craft described as "old timey," contrasted with the current version's advanced systems.

5. Secret Tech & Flying Command Center (04:52–07:54)

• Air Force One’s impressive features:
  • Military-grade secure communication, EMP hardening, advanced missile defense (laser jamming, flares), radar jamming, and unlimited range via in-flight refueling.
  • Ability for the President to broadcast national addresses from the air.
  • Some technology seems outdated (fax machines, 85+ telephones, satellite links).
  • Quote:
    • “The current Air Force One features 85 plus telephones, fax machines…” (06:03)
    • “Wait a minute. A fax machine? What am I doing? Am I in touch with like the old timey pharmacy in my town or something?” —Host A (06:06)
  • Irony over lack of Wi-Fi seen as an extreme inconvenience by today's standards.

6. EMP Weapons & Warfare (07:16–07:54)

• Discussion about EMP (Electromagnetic Pulse) hardening and the importance in the context of future warfare.
  • Speculation about the use of such weapons in past conflicts.

7. Creature Comforts: The Presidency vs. Regular Fliers (07:54–09:53)

• Air Force One luxuries: private quarters, conference rooms, full medical facilities.
• Humorous speculation about the bathroom quality aboard Air Force One, imagining Trump with a gold toilet seat.
  • Quote:
    • “He's got a gold toilet seat in there, guaranteed.” —Host A (08:28)
• Contrast with cramped, uncomfortable commercial airline bathrooms—especially for “big old boys” and tall people.
  • Quote:
    • “If you're standing to relieve yourself, if you're over like five-six, you gotta like frame your—Jesus. Wow. You gotta crane your neck or hunch. It's terrible.” —Host A (09:11)

8. First-Class Restroom Speculation & Airline Experience (09:53–11:58)

• Playful brainstorming: What if “first class” was repurposed as reserved bathroom access rather than nicer seats?
  • Suggestion that passengers might be willing to pay premium for larger or reserved toilets.
  • Quote:
    • “To have a really nice bathroom and maybe a reservation system. ‘Mr. Getty, party of one? Yes, yes, we're ready for you.’” —Host A (11:38)
• Hosts admit fasting before flights to avoid using airplane bathrooms.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Air Force One’s retro features:
  • “Wait a minute. A fax machine?” —Host A (06:06)
  • “You've got a Blockbuster for some reason, right?” —Host B (06:21)
• On bathroom logistics:
  • “Suppose Trump’s got a full size bathroom. He’s not squeezing into that little bathroom air.” —Host B (08:18)
• On airline customer service:
  • “Excuse me, air waitress, can you explain to me how that is going to work?” —Host A (08:58)
  • “And enjoy the hawker in your coffee.” —Host B (10:19)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:00–00:46 — Air Force One: Designation Explained
• 00:46–02:08 — Presidential Flight Incident & Skepticism
• 02:09–03:48 — The Aging Presidential Fleet
• 03:48–04:52 — Presidential Plane Exhibits & Museum Anecdotes
• 04:52–07:54 — Air Force One’s Secret Tech and Capabilities
• 07:54–09:53 — Creature Comforts & Bathroom Comparisons
• 09:53–11:58 — First-Class Restrooms: A Modest Proposal
• Throughout — Humorous asides, relatable airline experiences, and banter

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Tone & Style

• Informal, playful, and conversational
• Mix of factual information, personal anecdotes, and comedic riffing
• Lighthearted skepticism toward official narratives and outdated government technology

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This episode provides listeners with both quirky insights and solid information about Air Force One, blending real-world political trivia with trademark Armstrong & Getty humor—making aviation history unexpectedly relatable and entertaining.

Transcript

[A]

This is an Iheart podcast. Guaranteed human. It's actually not a plan, it's a designation. It's one more thing. Armstrong and Getty. One more thing.

[B]

That was an odd affectation you had there.

[A]

You can't fly in a. In a what did I say it was? Not a plane. It's a. It's a designation. You can't fly in a designation, you idiot. So any plane can be Air Force One. It's just whatever plane the president is on is designated Air Force One.

[B]

Any flying object the president is on is Air Force One.

[A]

The helicopters are Marine One.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So presumably if the President went up in a dirigible, that would be Air Force One, I guess.

[B]

Yeah. Clearly president was headed to Switzerland today and they had to turn around because they had an electrical problem. Or at least that's what they're saying. I don't know. Some people buying it.

[A]

Oh, is that right? Yeah, I hadn't seen anybody. Yeah, I just heard skepticism.

[B]

Some experts saying they've got like so many redundant backup systems on those on the Air Force One, which I'm sure they do, that likely that you would just turn around for an electric problem. You just switch to the backup, to the backup, to the backup and keep going?

[A]

Well, it depends on how many redundancies you have. I mean, if you're just going on a trip that could be delayed for three hours, will you trouble check the problem? I would go ahead and do what they did. Otherwise, you know, it's the whole. There's actually a pretty good joke about bad news, ladies and gentlemen. We've lost one of the engines, but don't worry, we have four engines and should be fine. Then the pilot comes back on bad news, folks. We've lost a second of our four engines, but we can fly perfectly fine. I can't remember what the, what the punchline of it is, but the point is. Yeah, don't, don't, don't assume everything's gonna go fine after the first screw up.

[B]

Well, I also think that why would they tell us anything other than we had like a problem, had turnaround, could be freaking anything.

[A]

Yeah, right. In fact, if something crazy covert happened, that's, that's good policy.

[C]

Sure.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Claim it was. Yeah, we forgot to pack the Diet Coke and the President, he was pissed, so we went back. They forgot the McDonald's. Right? Exactly. Yeah. Anyway, Josh Rogan, who we've chatted with more than once on the Armstrong and Getty show, know something about the Air force 1 fleet 15.

[C]

This happens all the time. You know, it's a really old fleet and there's a constant state of disrepair. It's much more rare for Air Force One than it is for like the planes that the Vice President or the Secretary of Defense, the Secretary of State might fly on. And so I think the fact that they caught it early and they turned back, it shouldn't really be a big problem. But it is kind of shocking to people who don't know, but it's kind of an open secret amongst the reporters who travel with senior officials that the US fleet is very old and the planes are not in good condition.

[B]

35 year old plane. So why in the world, with the amount of money we spend on everything in this country would the President be flying around in a 35 year old plane?

[A]

Well, let's hearken back to was it last year or the year before where the cutteries were Giving the President 747? That's right. And Trump was making a big deal out of how behind schedule Boeing was that they were supposed to have built a new set of Air Force Ones or whatever it is. Yeah, I don't know. That's. It's not all of. It's not a great look for American industry. Anyway, I've never been on the current Air Force One. I have a friend who has who says it's pretty amazing. I've been on old ones, a couple of old ones.

[B]

I can't believe I've never been to the Reagan National Library and because they got his plane there so you can see what an Air Force One looks like in the Presidential suite and all that sort of stuff. I've never done that. Why have I done that? I could do that with my kids. I'm gonna do that in the next couple of weekends. I'm vowing right now.

[A]

There is a wonderful airplane museum in the Seattle Tacoma area. I can't remember the name of it. I've been to that one. They have. I think it's Nixon's Air Force One there, which is super fun. It's you know, obviously a little more old timey, not quite as amazing as the new ones. But I've been reading about Air Force One. It's packed with secret tech functioning as a flying command center with and this. The lists here include, as I'm sure you'll notice, some wow stuff and also some, are you kidding me Stuff. I'm not sure how up to date this list is. But anyway, flying command center with military grade secure communications EMP hardened electronics and advanced missile defense like laser jamming and flares. Plus in flight fueling for unlimited range. It could fly forever.

[B]

Does it have like elastic stretchy thing in the seat in front of you so you like put your cup in there or something?

[A]

I'll bet it does. I'll bet it does. Yeah. Or even cup holders at least. Listen to this list. Key features include secure encrypted lines, WI fi. Oh, wait a minute.

[B]

You don't want have WI fi. You just gotta let China take over. I mean, come on.

[A]

Oh man, when I get on a flight that doesn't have the WI fi.

[B]

I'm like, I know.

[A]

What, what am I at Kitty Hawk with the Wright brothers?

[B]

I know I like going on here. And they'll make the announcement. Sorry, we're not gonna have WI FI on this flight. Sorry for the in beans.

[A]

Sorry for the inconvenience.

[B]

You just ruined my life.

[A]

Right, right. I can't believe you. Let's see, Countermeasures against that.

[B]

We're down a wing and we're going to do our best. Then we got no white wife.

[A]

Oh, geez. Let's see. They have countermeasures against attacks like DIRCM lasers, whatever those are. Chaff and flares and a hardened system to survive a nuclear blast. Wow. Wow. The current Air force one features 85 plus telephones, fax machines. 85 telephones.

[B]

Seems like a lot.

[A]

Wait a minute, wait a minute. A fax machine? What am I doing? Am I in touch with like the old timey pharmacy in my town or something? Wow. With floppy disks. Yeah.

[B]

You've got a blockbuster for some reason, right?

[A]

Internet for secure encrypted calls. Top secret to non secure video conferencing. See, the president can broadcast speeches live from midair. Satellite link down to, you know, the ground. It's kind of obvious when you think about it, but yeah, he could do a complete, you know, national address. My fellow Americans, we are at war with Greenland from the air, which is kind of cool. Defense and security. EMP hardening electronics and wiring are shielded to withstand electromagnetic pulses from nuclear blasts. It's a good thing too, because I've read articles about that. How EMP weapons are going to be the holy f weapons of warfare when it breaks out that all of a sudden everything that's powered by electricity will not work.

[B]

Might be what we used in Venezuela.

[A]

It could be something like that. Yeah. I wonder. Let's see. Missile defense equipped with. Oh, there it is. Directional infrared countermeasures. That's DIRCM lasers to blind heat seeking missile and chaff and flare Dispensers to decoy them. Radar jamming. It's armored the airframe and windows are armored to resist attacks. Can do in flight. Refueling. Self sufficiency. Has a self contained baggage loader and large galleys to serve meals for up to 100 people. With thousands of meals in storage.

[B]

Thousands of meals in case they have to like they thought they might have to with W. After 9 11. Just keep flying around for a really long time.

[A]

Right, right. A self contained baggage loader.

[B]

Oh, it's just a little guy in.

[C]

A cage they keep under the plane.

[A]

I figured it was a bag bot, but no, it's actually a. Wow. That's.

[B]

Suppose you suppose Trump's got a full size bathroom. He's not squeezing into that little bathroom air.

[A]

Oh yeah, yeah.

[B]

Sit on that seat.

[A]

Oh, he's got a gold toilet seat in there, guaranteed. Yeah, yeah. I mean if you look at the Oval Office, which you've described as looking like a Chinese restaurant, to me it looks like the throne room and you know, Brunei or something like that. Yeah.

[B]

Southwest flight recently, there was a big old boy headed to the bathroom and I thought, I don't want to see him go to the bathroom. But I would like to know the mechanics of how this is going to work. I just.

[A]

Right. Much as I'd like to mock you for that, that, that vision, but no, I, I've, I've thought the same thing.

[B]

There's no way.

[A]

Excuse me, Excuse me, flight attendant, can you explain to me how that is going to work? Oh, and, and, or super tall. Guys. Ladies, you, you might not know this, but you. If you're standing to relieve yourself, if you're over like five, six, you gotta like frame your. Jesus. Wow. You gotta, you gotta crane your neck or hunch or whatever. It's terrible.

[C]

Oh, you poor things.

[A]

Childbirth. Wow. The trump card. Let's see. The creature comforts include private quarters, conference rooms, office space and a medical facility. Does not mention the size of the turlet facilities. Connectivity, blah, blah, blah. Air Force One isn't just a plane. It's a secure flying fortress and command center built to keep the President in command during any crisis.

[B]

So you think it. When a really, really big old boy is going down the aisle, you could say to the air waitress, yeah, there's going to need to be somebody to mop with in there in about five minutes because there's no possible way that guy can do what he needs to do.

[A]

It's a got to be a miserable experience.

[B]

Oh, it would have to be.

[C]

First raise your hand and make sure you go, excuse me, air waitress.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

And enjoy the hawker in your coffee.

[A]

Hey sweetheart, Sweetheart, you legs. Hey, I got a question. Just like that?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Wow. What would, you know, what would it cost to. I'm thinking like toilet, first class. Maybe you got the same size seats as coach or whatever. Maybe the same experience. But like you have a reserved really nice bathroom. What would that cost?

[B]

That's an interesting idea.

[C]

So you're in coach, but you get.

[B]

The first class bathroom kind of a thing.

[A]

Well, yeah, I mean, because first class bathrooms are just bathrooms, right?

[B]

Yeah, well that's.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Maybe eliminate the first class seats but make the bathroom the first. The first class experience is the bathroom.

[A]

Or that's just another tier of service. I mean you could get the first class seats and bathrooms. Although again, first class doesn't get first class bathrooms. There's bathrooms and then. Yeah. Wow. I mean, I like leg room. I like, you know, not having some big old boy pressed up against me, but like to have a really nice bathroom and maybe a reservation system. Mr. Getty? Mr. Getty, party of one? Yes, yes, we're ready for you. Oh, lovely. Thank you. I'm going. I would walk up the aisle.

[B]

I'm gonna need from 10 to 10:30.

[A]

That's gonna cost you. This is why I fast before I go on an airplane.

[B]

Yeah, that's what my son does. Yeah, I just.

[A]

I don't even want to ever see that bathroom. Well, I guess that's it. This is an I heart podcast.

[C]

Guaranteed human.