Loading summary
Transcript225 lines
- [00:00]
A
This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human. You know what your customers are doing right this second? The exact same thing. You are listening to me. Which, let's be honest, is kind of flattering. But my point Is, ads on iHeartRadio actually get heard in the car, at the gym, on the couch while people are walking their dogs.
- [00:20]
B
Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?
- [00:22]
A
You're a good boy.
- [00:23]
B
That's right, dude.
- [00:23]
A
You're a good. So why not make the next ad about you? Get started today. Call 844-844-IHEART or go to iheartadvertising.com that's 844-8844, iheart or iheartadvertising.com what do you think makes the perfect snack? Hmm, it's gotta be when I'm really craving it and it's convenient. Could you be more specific? When it's cray venient. Okay. Like a freshly baked cookie made with real butter, available right down the street at am, pm or a savory breakfast sandwich I can grab in just a second at a.m. pM. I'm seeing a pattern here. Well, yeah, we're talking about what I crave, which is anything from am, pm. What more could you want? Stop by AMPM where the snacks and drinks are perfectly craveable and convenient. That's cravenience am PM too. Good stuff.
- [01:06]
C
Starting a business can be overwhelming. You're juggling multiple roles, designer, marketer, logistics manager, all while bringing your vision to life. But for millions of businesses, Shopify is the ultimate partner. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the US from household names like Mattel and Gymshark to brands just getting started. Build a stunning online store with Shopify's ready to use templates, boost content with AI powered product descriptions, page headlines and enhance photography. Marketing is easy with built in tools for email and social media campaigns. Plus, Shopify simplifies everything from inventory to shipping and returns. If you're ready to sell, you're ready for Shopify. Turn your big business idea into With Shopify on your side, sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com try go to shopify.com try shopify.com.
- [02:07]
B
Broadcasting live from the Abraham Lincoln Radio.
- [02:10]
A
Studio, the George Washington Broadcast Center, Jack.
- [02:13]
B
Armstrong and Joe Getty. Armstrong and Getty. And now here's Armstrong and Getty.
- [02:29]
A
I got a couple little things for you after we get through clips of the week, a book recommendation question about the whole Bombing drug boats. Trump is, as we speak, as we record this podcast or do this radio show live, attending the FIFA World cup draw.
- [02:49]
B
That's a soccer critical moment, Right? They draw the various teams and things to set the, you know, the lineup and such.
- [02:58]
A
The reason he's there live, the Kennedy center in Washington, is he's receiving the FIFA World Peace Prize, which I guess is a. Not the Nobel Peace Prize, but a secondary peace prize that they're giving to.
- [03:11]
B
Donald Trump from a soccer outfit. A hilariously corrupt soccer organization.
- [03:17]
A
Correct, Correct.
- [03:21]
B
All right, is the UN assembly giving out soccer awards too, or what? This is very odd.
- [03:29]
A
I don't like your skepticism.
- [03:32]
B
Please. It's not skepticism. It's contempt.
- [03:36]
A
Or soccer or peace.
- [03:39]
B
The idea that freaking FIFA and it's bribe bribing, money sucking, caviar eating private jet flying denizens would confer a peace prize on Trump for any reason other than to kiss his ass is absolutely hilarious.
- [03:57]
A
I have a feeling they give this prize to whatever country is hosting every time because the country usually gets it for corrupt reasons also.
- [04:05]
B
Or bribing whoever they need something from. Right? Yeah, exactly. That's hilarious. All right, there's lots to squeeze in the final hour of the week, but first, it's the Friday tradition. Let's take fond look back at the week that was. It's Cal clips of the week.
- [04:22]
Growing bipartisan alarm over President Trump's escalating.
- [04:26]
A
Military campaign in the Caribbean Sea.
- [04:29]
B
This is called the fog of war. The two survivors climbed back onto the boat after the initial strike. What I saw in that room was.
- [04:38]
A
One of the most troubling things I've.
- [04:39]
B
Seen in my time in public service.
- [04:42]
A
No, I didn't see anything disturbing about it. We've only just begun striking narco boats.
- [04:49]
B
House Republicans launch an investigation into widespread Covid era fraud involving some members of Minnesota's large Somali community.
- [04:58]
A
Elon Omar is garbage. Garbage.
- [05:02]
B
The president's obsession with me is really unhealthy.
- [05:07]
A
It's creepy.
- [05:09]
B
You know, it's a raw deal for the brother. He divorced his first wife, which was probably a goat, and wound up marrying a pig in Ilhan Omar. She's a nasty person. Very nasty. Everybody talks about this place being a dadgum swamp. It's not a swamp.
- [05:22]
A
This is a sewer.
- [05:23]
B
This is created by man.
- [05:29]
Don't say anything crazy, man.
- [05:34]
You burned my house down. As I have said before, if the judge picks through all of that hair and finds only one eye, he's got the wrong end of the dog.
- [05:45]
A
An animal control officer says the Raccoon was found Saturday passed out next to the store's toilet. Oh, my God.
- [05:56]
B
What the. Is that Waymo doing 47 yard try now by Young Way cool.
- [06:02]
A
And he stumbled.
- [06:04]
B
Patriots ball.
- [06:05]
A
I don't think I've ever seen that. Because they're in a constant state of.
- [06:09]
B
Dopamine withdrawal at school.
- [06:11]
A
They behave like addicts.
- [06:13]
B
They're super emotional. Like the smallest thing sets them off. Hey, if the panties fit, wear them anyway. Wow, that's right.
- [06:21]
A
Another misogyny Friday on the Armstrong engagement.
- [06:24]
B
No, it's accuracy. Truth is an absolute defense against misogyny.
- [06:29]
A
It's clips of the week.
- [06:34]
Cavalcade of fun, I'd say. Yeah, a couple things for you. This is on a discussion we had last hour about corruption in Turkish soccer. Boy, aren't you sorry you missed that.
- [06:46]
B
It's another Turkish Soccer Friday.
- [06:48]
A
We take a deep look into Turkish professional soccer in hour three. That's a podcast for the kids. Actually, they did. The players, the coaches, the owners, the refs and the announcers are all corrupt in Turkish soccer. But anyway, Joe said something about wanting to know more about Turkey, and it reminded me one of my favorite books I've ever read in my entire life. It's literature by this guy who won the Nobel Prize for literature. I don't know how to pronounce his name. Oren Pamuk, something like that. Anyway, wrote this book called Snow that I read several years ago. Every time somebody wins the Nobel Prize for literature, I try to read one of their books and they're always amazing. I mean, just amazing. But it's. It's about a poet who returns to Turkey. Political Islam and secular tensions collide, etc. Etc. But it's.
- [07:37]
Fiction very often is better at describing something than any sort of real book can be.
- [07:44]
B
Right.
- [07:44]
A
And this is one of those great recommendations.
- [07:47]
B
Snow by unpronounceable.
- [07:48]
A
Yeah. Nobel Prize winning Turkish guy.
- [07:54]
B
Did he get any prizes from FIFA, soccer people?
- [07:59]
A
So I saw this from our friend Tim Sandifer, and this. I don't think this argument completely works, but it's worth mentioning the argument that we're bombing these drug boats because they're sending all these drugs to America that kill tens of thousands of Americans. Alcohol kills.
- [08:19]
On average over the last several decades, about a hundred thousand people a year. And we ain't bombing any distilleries. That's always been an interesting thing about how alcohol is grandfathered in as a drug we accept and are okay with. It's less ridiculous now that pot is legal practically everywhere.
- [08:38]
B
But when pot Was illegal reading. Massachusetts might become the first state to go back to. Wow.
- [08:45]
A
I wondered about that. So currently I think it's 38 states where pot is legal, which makes it very easy to get anywhere in the United States because even if you live in a state where it's not legal, you probably live next to a state where it is. I was quite amazed, my kids. It became kind of a running joke as we did a road trip driving all the way to Kansas, 1800 miles or something like that. How big the whole pot shop thing is. You drive through some of these small towns and they have two or three giant dope stores in tiny towns. You think, are there enough people buying dope to keep three big shops alive in this town? Apparently there are.
- [09:25]
B
Yeah.
- [09:25]
A
Yeah. Wow.
- [09:27]
B
Massachusetts is the first and several others are taking a serious look at it. With the thinking being what the positives have not been nearly what was promised and the negatives were more than we'd guessed they would be.
- [09:40]
A
What were the positives into that?
- [09:42]
B
A little bit longer or a little bit more later in the hour?
- [09:44]
A
Oh, yeah, if you. I would like. I would love to hear more about that. That's really interesting. I'd like to know what positives they were hoping for that didn't materialize.
- [09:52]
B
Can I answer another question you've had this week?
- [09:57]
Who is responsible for all these really encouraging consumer spending numbers of late when so much of America is saying I'm terrified and or behind on all their payments, according to the Wall Street Journal? And you'd think they would know. Two different consumers are fueling this holiday shopping season. High end luxury shoppers and deal hunters making everyday spending trade offs to keep the gifts flowing. It's weighted to the high end and the low end.
- [10:27]
A
So the stat has been that the top 10% of wage earners are doing half of consumer spending. So obviously that distorts the numbers quite a bit. And then you got the people that were willing to stand in line on Black Friday to get a $80 blender or whatever. You're hoping to get that crowd.
- [10:46]
B
Yeah. So I thought this was a pretty good description too. Even with holiday shopping off to a robust start, consumers, especially those from less affluent households, are pulling back on routine purchases as they give priority to gifts and holiday meals. Sales on things that can wait, like haircuts, pricier razors, fast casual lunches are slipping. Notably, spending on clothing, toys and seasonal items, on the other hand, is strong. So they're just cutting back in other ways.
- [11:11]
A
So your long haired parents, having not had money For a haircut will give you something for Christmas, Right?
- [11:17]
B
Right. They're unshaven, long hair, unfed. Parents buying you toys. God bless them.
- [11:26]
A
Here's a decent place for me to throw in one of my many screeds about Chinese crap that's been driving me crazy for many, many years. And I don't know if there's any turning this around. Basically, my complaint has been.
- [11:39]
Why don't we all just spend a little more on a bunch of stuff that's much higher quality, lasts longer than buying the cheapest Chinese crap out there. Our parents used to spend more on lots of different items, but they were much better items. And in the long run, you spent less money. And our hunger for Chinese crap. Here's my latest example. Pencils. My kids go through pencils. They're just crap. They're practically free. Like, you can buy a box of number two pencils at the dollar store for like a dollar and a half, and they're crap. I mean, you can't sharpen. The lead breaks. The erasers are useless.
- [12:17]
B
Wow.
- [12:18]
A
And they're just crap. So I came across the New York Times. One of my favorite things in the New York Times is Wirecutter. Their suggestion for products. I use it all the time. And they suggested these pencils. They said, if you want pencils like the kind you had as a kid, these are your pencils. And they're made in Germany. And they're more expensive. They're like a dollar a pencil. Which, by the way, is about what pencils cost when we were kids, adjusted for inflation. But people were willing to pay a little more for something that wasn't crap.
- [12:46]
B
Right.
- [12:46]
A
Anyway, these dollar a pencil pencils, as soon as I got them in the mail, I mean, that you can just as soon as you pulled out of the box, like, oh, yeah, this is what a pencil used to be. They look different, they feel different. I give it to my kids and they're like, dad, the eraser works. It doesn't just rip a hole in the page. It actually erases the lead.
- [13:04]
B
You could defeat the French with these.
- [13:06]
A
Pencils, and you can sharpen it up and write for a long time. And it's amazing.
- [13:13]
B
German word for pencil is the Haben darven Herbin hinge. It's like 73 letters long.
- [13:20]
A
I just wish we'd go back to spending a little more on things that last longer. It's actually cheaper in the long run. So it's not a. You got to be rich to do it and just demand more quality.
- [13:31]
B
Number two Pencils are number two. That's what I say. Oh, now, here's. Here's a thought. Here's a counter argument. I have no counter argument for pencils. You know, washers and dryers and that sort of thing. Durable goods.
- [13:44]
A
Ought to be electronics.
- [13:45]
B
Oh, my God. Yeah, please.
- [13:47]
A
Stuff so cheap you can buy Chinese tools are worthless. It should be against the law to sell them. Now, come on. China.
- [13:55]
B
Yeah, no kidding. Crap. You know, I. I got a big China segment prepared. I've had it ready all week. We haven't gotten to it just because the fact that China is a giant hostile power that seeks every single second of every day to overthrow us and ruin our society. I mean, it's just. Nobody wants to hear it anymore anyway. But here's my argument for toys. Your kid is gonna play with the toy for a very short time, then forget about it. Anyway.
- [14:22]
A
Yeah, the toys doesn't really bother me.
- [14:24]
B
I suppose better, you know, I think of the Tonka trucks I got as a kid. I mean, I was playing with those things for years.
- [14:31]
A
Yeah, Yeah.
- [14:32]
B
I mean, and then you give them to your own kids, who give them to their kids. Unless you leave it out in the rain too much. Just unbelievably good. But with toys. Yeah, maybe we're better off a little cheap. Do you need a tinker toy set that you could literally, like, build the back porch with it and have barbecues on there? Really? If it's gonna just collect dust anyway, I know that's your jihad. I'll let you work that desk.
- [14:55]
A
Yeah, I think we'd all be better off. And then it would also. It would allow a lot of these products to be made in the United States because we would demand a little higher quality and be willing to pay a little more for it. I think.
- [15:08]
B
Other than fans of Dave Ramsey, is there any I don't use credit subculture in America, really, that you've heard about? Because that's such a good idea.
- [15:19]
A
But only Amish, probably.
- [15:21]
B
Well.
- [15:23]
I don't see Amish guys whipping out their credit cards. Pull it right out of their beard. Here, you take plastic.
- [15:29]
A
Of course. You pull it out of your beard. Of course that's the way it would work. Okay, we got more on the way. Stay here. Armstrong and Getty AI Agents are everywhere, automating tasks and making decisions at machine speed. But agents make mistakes. Just one rogue agent can do big damage before you even notice. Rubrik. Agent Cloud is the only platform that helps you monitor agents, set guardrails and rewind mistakes so you can unleash agents, not risk. Accelerate your AI transformation@rubrik.com that's R U B R-I K.com if you're the purchasing manager at a manufacturing plant, you know having a trusted partner makes all the difference. That's why hands down, you count on Grainger for auto reordering. With on time restocks, your team will have the cut resistant gloves they need at the start of the their shift and you can end your day knowing they've got safety well in hand. Call 1-800-granger. Click granger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done.
- [16:40]
This is the first year college football playoffs will feature 12 teams which haven't been named yet. I think they get named next weekend but 12 team playoff for college football Meringue signing. Looking forward to it. They don't crown a champion till almost February.
- [16:56]
B
You know what I hadn't realized till I came across an article about it today was that high school football they're highlighting. Southern California high school football is now full on the nil money thing with boosters paying big money to little kids to come to their high schools.
- [17:15]
A
Wow.
- [17:16]
B
To play football.
- [17:18]
A
Wow. I know a little bit about that. Yeah. That's interesting.
- [17:21]
B
Well, in this one kid that they highlight who's now he's going to be playing in the Big Ten championship game for Ohio State, a receiver. The story opens with him tearfully calling his grandmother, begging her to come get him because his drug addict mother had sold him to a team. Oh, in Southern California to go play receiver there. It's unbelievable. Speaking of the evils of modern society.
- [17:48]
A couple of days ago, Massachusetts voters took a major step to repeal the legalization of recreational marijuana in the state.
- [17:56]
The Coalition for a Healthy Massachusetts submitted more than 74,000 signatures required to put the question on the 2026 state ballot. Once certified, the measure will go to the state legislature for consideration. If they decline to pass it, organizers must collect more signatures to put it to a statewide vote next year. But Massachusetts isn't alone. In Idaho, where marijuana is currently illegal, a measure to block future voter initiatives to legalize the drug is on the ballot for 2026.
- [18:26]
A
So what led them to want to do this? What were they thinking was going to happen when it was legalized? That hasn't occurred. Or the reverse? I guess.
- [18:37]
B
There are a bunch of unforeseen effects. Number one, it was believed by a lot of people that the rate of marijuana use wouldn't change much. It would just be out in the open and could be regulated and blah, blah, blah, but freely legal weed and the fact that it's practically laughable, the idea that the cops would talk to somebody who has marijuana to make sure it's legal weed or whatever in the legalized states, it's just, it's not happening. So lots and lots more people are smoking pot. The promised tax revenues have not materialized. The black market for pot hasn't gone anywhere because the like in California, it's so taxed and regulated, it's legal. Pot is pretty expensive. And though plenty of people consume it, a lot of people just keep going to their neighborhood dealer they've always gone to.
- [19:23]
A
But so back to the conversation of.
- [19:25]
B
You know, it's really, really bad for kids brains.
- [19:28]
A
80 to 100,000 people die from drinking every year. So is pot worse than drinking?
- [19:35]
B
I don't know. So I think that's probably an unanswerable.
- [19:39]
A
Question or drinking just got grandfathered in and it doesn't need to make sense. It's just a thing.
- [19:45]
B
You happen to be out dealing with important stuff. When we were talking about the drunken monkey hypothesis and a brand new study that's come out that shows that chimps in the wild take in one to two drinks worth of alcohol every day in fermented fruit, like right after lunch. Well, sometimes just in the evening to take the edge off. You've been peeling bananas all day. You got your wife and you just.
- [20:08]
A
You know how it goes, peeling bananas all day.
- [20:12]
B
Maybe we can touch on that a little bit later on.
- [20:14]
A
Talk about that right when we come back. I didn't get to get in on this conversation. That is my wheelhouse. Drunken monkeys. Stay tuned.
- [20:22]
B
Armstrong and Getty.
- [20:25]
A
The whole drugs and alcohol thing is really interesting in a lot of different ways. So we're kind of all over the place on this conversation about, you know, we're droning people in boats because they're sending drugs to the United States and considering them committing acts of war, while at the same time we got 100,000 people that drink themselves to death every single year. And that's legal. And we legalized pot in a whole bunch of different states. And now at least a couple of states are looking at making it illegal again for a variety of reasons, which is pretty interesting. I wonder if that's going to become a trend.
- [21:01]
B
Yeah, one of the leaders in this trend, he talks about how in the style of the cigarette companies especially, and to some extent the alcohol companies, it's a business that promotes addiction. Their entire business model is they need more addiction and there's unquestionably an addiction, whether psychological or physical, to marijuana. It's just beyond display.
- [21:24]
A
A lot of people deny that they're wrong.
- [21:28]
B
And.
- [21:30]
There you have a five times greater chance of psychosis, developing serious psychotic conditions if you're a heavy marijuana smoker. And it's funny, whenever we talk about this, we get the one stoner who says that, why don't you guys do some research? That's totally not true. I've been smoking dope for 20 years and it hasn't affected me. Yeah, okay. Apparently you've smoked too much dope to understand what five times more likely means, so thanks for the note. Anyway, I've also known a few stoners.
- [22:00]
A
Who had really sad lives, who talked about how it hadn't hurt them any. I've known a few in my life. You don't do anything. You sit on the couch as an overweight person with no friends or.
- [22:14]
Romantic interests, watching television, and you talk about it has had no effect on your life. Well, it's possible, but sad.
- [22:24]
B
So apparently, when the University of California at Berkeley isn't busy indoctrinating your kids to despise their country and become Marxists, they actually still do some science, and in this case, drunken monkey science. Chimpanzees naturally ingest surprising amounts of alcohol from ripe, fermenting fruit, and careful measurement shows that their typical fruit diet can equal one to two human drinks each day. Now, aside from being just interesting and somewhat amusing on its face, it supports the idea that alcohol exposure is not a modern human invention, but an ancient primate habit. The work strengthens the drunken monkey hypothesis and opens new questions about how animals use ethanol cues in their environment.
- [23:10]
A
So the the equivalent of a human drink. Because they're smaller than us, aren't they?
- [23:15]
B
One to two. Yeah. What's a chimpanzee way that's £40? I don't know. Oh, actually, they're bigger than that. Yeah, I think they are. Standard drink in the US contains 14 grams of ethanol, please. Irrespective of the consumer's body size. Although in much of Europe, standard is 10 grams. Learn to drink Euros.
- [23:34]
A
Do you have any adult drinks around here? Trying to enjoy myself, yeah.
- [23:39]
B
Yeah. Well, what they don't know is whether chimpanzees deliberately choose fruits with higher ethanol levels to take the edge off.
- [23:48]
Those tend to be riper and richer in sugar that can ferment, so they might just taste better. However, many of the fruit species they regularly eat contain measurable ethanol, indicating that alcohol is a routine part of their Menu and probably present in the diets of our human ancestors as well.
- [24:05]
A
We got a number of texts on the whole, we're not bombing distilleries, but we are bombing drug traffickers. You know, fentanyl, marijuana versus booze thing. A couple of them being that fentanyl. Pretty decent chance you keep messing around fentanyl is going to kill you. Very unlikely that booze is going to kill most people.
- [24:24]
B
Right. Nobody's ever cracked open a Miller Light and died because Miller put, you know, 7,000 times the alcohol in that can.
- [24:34]
A
There's also the. We tried banning booze once and it didn't go well. The fact that you just can't is part of it. Irma Gerd.
- [24:43]
B
I totally forgot. Today is the anniversary of the 21st Amendment that repealed the. Was it the 21st or 22nd? I can never remember. I probably drink too much. That repealed prohibition. Today is the anniversary.
- [24:55]
A
I believe it's the 22nd because I've known a few bars called the 22nd Amendment and Liquor stores.
- [24:59]
B
Right, yeah. That's why, you know, it clicked in my head. But anyway, yeah, it was passed just in time for the holidays.
- [25:05]
A
Oh, really?
- [25:05]
B
To the delight of many. And today is the anniversary, so cheers to that.
- [25:09]
A
The worst part of that whole thing, of course, being it's kind of like the way Covid was the important and powerful did whatever the hell they wanted. The rules only applied to you. And that's the way it was with booze. And that's really, really maddening, you know that politicians or the rich or whoever, they were drinking as much as they ever drank. It's just that you, you, you regular working class people can't handle it. I can.
- [25:34]
B
Right, right. And the one other aspect of this that's always bothered me, and it's funny, we haven't talked about this for a long time, is that if you have a society that become overly legalistic where the only question is, is it illegal or not illegal, lawful or not, as opposed to is it a good idea or not? Is it moral or not? Does it make me a better person or not? I would much rather have things. I would much rather persuade people than persuade the government to use its guns to, to get people to live better lives.
- [26:07]
A
Yeah. That's one of the things I really hated about when marijuana really caught on as illegalizing. It was just the non stop. Here we go. 100%. This is fantastic. Without any, you know, smoking pot on a regular basis might not be the best thing for your life. Let's keep that in mind.
- [26:26]
B
It's practically guaranteed not to be. And that says a guy who used to smoke a substantial amount of pot. Looking back, it didn't do me any good. I enjoyed it at the time. It made movies kind of more entertaining, etc. The grass was greener, blah blah, blah. Music sounded really great, but I love music anyway. I still love music. It's just. Yeah, you're right. To, to act as if it's an unambiguous good and harmless is just dishonest for some reason.
- [26:54]
A
I keep thinking of.
- [26:57]
Todd Snyder, one of my favorite musicians of all time. There's a punchline to this here.
- [27:03]
Had some song where he talked about people like drugs, they're gonna do drugs. And it's not which drugs, it's which drugs the companies allow you to do or blah blah, blah. He had this very cynical attit, people trying to regulate drugs and everything. Like he's dead now at age 59 as of a couple of weeks ago, as a guy who just couldn't ever wrap his head around drinking and doing drugs, always thought it was hilarious that anybody would try to make him quit. And now he's dead at a fifth as a 59 year old because.
- [27:29]
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unbelievable. Well, that was much more serious than my drunken chimp characterizations of a few minutes ago.
- [27:41]
A
Do the monkeys drink to excess? Do they ever get drunk? That, that's an interesting thing because they have what, 99% of our biology. Do they ever drink too much and wake up and think, whoa, wow, I gotta get, gotta take it, I gotta do a dry January or something. Things have gotten out of hand.
- [28:00]
B
Yeah, right. Actually, it's very, very rare according to the scientists because they feed on fruit throughout the day and it's the fermented fruit that gets them a bu. But to actually feel intoxicated, a chimp would need to eat so much fruit that it would be painful.
- [28:17]
A
Well, that, see that's interesting. That gets back to. That's kind of like with the weed thing, you know, your old time hippies will say no. This weed that you're buying at the store is nothing like what I was smoking at Woodstock, where you could smoke it all day long and you know, stay on your feet and keep your mind. And it's the same with a lot of booze. Our founding fathers drank all day, every day. Beer that just barely had alcohol in it. Similar monkeys. To get drunk enough to cause yourself any problems you did, you'd thrown up. To drink that much of the beer that they had at the time, we should just have less potent booze.
- [28:55]
B
Certainly there's an argument there. Yeah.
- [28:57]
A
And less potent pot. Just kind of keep the light buzz going. That's what you want.
- [29:02]
B
Well, right, exactly. Yeah. Stay on top of the wave. So what would stress chimps out? That they need a couple of drinks at the end of the day? Probably the whole mating thing or I don't know.
- [29:16]
A
The whole mating thing. It's a pretty big deal for all beasts.
- [29:20]
B
Yes.
- [29:21]
But that's not stressful. That's more like, hey baby, why don't you. Why don't we have a couple of fermented mangoes and you sit on my.
- [29:28]
A
Lap and you wake up with an orangutan.
- [29:36]
B
Yeah. What, what do chimps do all day? They just gather food, right?
- [29:39]
A
They peel bananas upside down and mate.
- [29:42]
B
And tend to their little cute little chimp kids.
- [29:47]
A
Monkeys peel their bananas from the bottom, unlike humans. And I've tried to do that. It's not easy. I don't know if you have to have the monkey fingernails or grip strength.
- [29:56]
B
Right? Like not, not the stem end. No, the other end.
- [30:00]
A
Yeah, that's the way they peel bananas. And I would think they've got a better handle on it right now.
- [30:07]
B
I was joking earlier that perhaps the chimps had, you know, hen pecking wives and they had a couple of drinks to take the edge off. But long day responsible.
- [30:15]
A
Long day in the jungle.
- [30:17]
B
God, I told you. I will strip the leaves off this stick and turn it into a tool this weekend. Can I watch the game?
- [30:27]
That's my new chimp sitcom, Chi Chi's.
- [30:31]
A
Place, in which he has a couple drinks every day. Like a human.
- [30:35]
B
Exactly.
- [30:35]
A
Okay, we will. That's funny. We will finish strong.
- [30:39]
B
Next, Armstrong and Getty. MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell has filed to run for governor of Minnesota. Up against Tim Waltz.
- [30:54]
A
Turnabout is fair play.
- [30:56]
B
Tim Waltz is now launching his own line of Egyptian cotton hypoallergenic tampons.
- [31:05]
A
Never forget, I got a no pillow last night. Once again recommended by the New York Times Wirecutter, which I trust and really, really like. But this is the first pillow I've ever come across. I've been struggling to find just the right. I've spent a lot of money on pillows and a lot of them I still don't like. But this one, you, you take stuffing out until you get to just the right amount. So I'm letting it unfluff, like for 24 hours, then you can sleep on it. If it's too fat, unzip it, take some of it out, smooth it out, then try it. Take a little until you get just the right amount. You know, that's always my problem, is a pillow being a little too fat or too thin.
- [31:43]
B
I have my favorite pillow of my entire life right now. We discovered it whilst shopping for mattresses.
- [31:48]
A
What's the brand?
- [31:49]
B
Fantastic. I don't remember. I'd have to look. But the amazing thing about it is it's super supportive. I'm a side sleeper, so I want my head up. But it's got the most amazing cooling properties I've ever got. A hot head plugged in. Oh, please. Number one, my head's immense. Number two, it runs hot as you know, Bit of a hothead.
- [32:09]
A
I sleep on my stomach. I think that's why it makes getting a pillow. I need to develop my bed. Have you ever heard my idea for a bed? And I can't believe this is copyrighted. I think this would work so well for people like me. Side sleepers or stomach sleepers. There's a hole in the bed that you can put your arm through because the arm is always in the way. It's like, where do I put this arm to be comfortable? If I could put my arm through a hole in the bed and then it's just completely out of the way.
- [32:35]
B
I think Homer Simpson invent something like that.
- [32:38]
A
No, he put the little things behind the chair like Thomas Edison.
- [32:42]
B
Oh, and the toilet recliner too, so you don't have to get up while you're watching the game.
- [32:47]
A
Right now the armhole through the bed is mine. And I really think that would work. I know why I haven't made a prototype yet and tried to sell it to somebody. I could be like, I should have talked to Mike Lindell when I saw him at the convention. Hey, I got an idea for a bed. You and I could go in together.
- [33:01]
B
So here's a question only semi related. Why is God punishing the people of Minnesota by giving them the choice between Mike or Walt? Tim Waltz and Mike Lindell, Right? Good Lord. Hey, we have a little Democracy has failed.
- [33:16]
A
We have a little breaking news thing I want to get on just because it's so dumb. We talked earlier about the Netflix deal. They're going to try to buy HBO and something else and become some even bigger behemoth in that world. Elizabeth Warren doesn't like it. I just love the fact that certain politicians hate any this sort of thing. Weighed in on Netflix's proposed purchase of Warner Brothers, describing it as a nightmare that would lead to higher subscription prices and Fewer choices for consumers.
- [33:47]
B
Threatening to force.
- [33:48]
A
Threatening to force Americans into higher subscription prices. Fewer choices over what and how they watch while putting American workers at risk.
- [33:56]
B
Sounds like she's on the war path, Jack.
- [33:58]
A
American workers at risk. How about that? The template that exists for that crowd. Everything puts American workers at risk. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Shut up.
- [34:11]
B
Yeah, no kidding. I'm so tired of politics. I'd rather talk about chimps drinking.
- [34:17]
A
Don't you have.
- [34:18]
B
Hold on a sec, I'm gonna get me a beer. Don't you have my ape friend? There you go, Michael.
- [34:25]
A
Don't you have a deer hide to tan or something?
- [34:31]
B
Don't you have to load your teepee up on horseback as Congress's session is ending? Ride home.
- [34:39]
A
How much time we got, Michael?
- [34:41]
B
You got about a minute and a half.
- [34:42]
A
Oh, we have a minute and a half. Okay, we gotta figure out what we want to do for the One More Thing podcast which we record every single day after the show. It's one extra segment that does not air on the radio. If you haven't been listening to it, you should get back, go back and listen to all of them. We've recorded for the past several years. Are really, really good. Wherever you find podcasts. Oh, I wanted to mention that one of my favorite all time podcasts, Joe always tries to claim there are no more podcasts than.
- [35:04]
B
That's correct. That's right.
- [35:05]
A
If you're not into the rest is history. As a history buff, that is such a great podcast and it just won Apple's 2025 podcast of the year award, which it's won several years in a row or whatever. It is so freaking good. And they got episodes going back for years and years and years. And whether you like World War II or Queen Elizabeth or whatever the hell they do, these sometimes multi part features. Tom Holland is one of the guys and then I forget the name of the other guy. They're funny, they're historians that just. Oh, it's. If you like history, it's the best thing ever. Give that as a gift to somebody because I think you have to actually pay for it or subscribe or something. That'd be a good gift. If you know a history buff instead of a book. Give them that podcast endlessly.
- [35:49]
B
Way to promote the competition. Thanks. Slapping food out of my kids mouths. My kids are grown, they get their own food.
- [35:54]
A
Podcasting is one of the greatest things that's ever happened. If you're interested in will anything, there's a podcast out there and some of these people aren't making really any money. They're just like, you know, you're like a chemist who would love to tell people about some specific thing you know a lot about. And you do for a couple of podcasts and you can find them and listen to them.
- [36:13]
B
It's awesome, right?
- [36:13]
A
There's never been a greater time to get knowledge and you don't need to go to college to do it. All the knowledge is out there in all kinds of different forms. Books, podcasts, YouTube videos, whatever. Any knowledge you want about anything is out there and you can get it for free.
- [36:30]
Hey, kids, it's that time again.
- [36:35]
B
With Armstrong and Getty. That's right.
- [36:37]
A
Here's your host for final thoughts, Joe Getty.
- [36:39]
B
How about a final thought from everybody on the crew to wrap up the show in the week? Michelangelo, our technical director, will lead the way. Michael. Yeah, I was just thinking, if I'm around a drunk monkey, I want him.
- [36:48]
A
To be a happy drunk, not an angry drunk. Especially if I just got a new haircut.
- [36:54]
B
Wow. Well said. Never forget, Katie Greener, esteemed newswoman, has a final thought. Katie?
- [37:00]
A
Jack, I'm perplexed about your bed hole.
- [37:02]
B
Like, would the arm just hang there?
- [37:04]
A
If you're a side sleeper, I think you'd want to go like into like at a right angle and it could fit into the mattress if it just.
- [37:11]
B
Roll over in the night without waking up and you might tear all sorts of tendons.
- [37:15]
A
Well, don't do that.
- [37:20]
B
Final thoughts.
- [37:21]
A
Jack Yes, I bid on 10 pounds of homemade toffee at a high school band fundraiser last night and won it. And I got it. And it is so delicious. How many of the 10 pounds of toffee will be left Monday morning if I keep it around the house? Because I put a pretty good dent in it last night.
- [37:40]
B
My final thought, I was so excited yesterday, I received my F y' all looking T shirt, my Armstrong and Getty T shirt. And I've never been more in the mood to wear it than I am right now. You can pick up some great A and G swag you might get in time for Christmas. Roll the dice. Come on. Where's that American spirit? Armstrongandgetty.com.
- [38:01]
Who knows?
- [38:01]
A
You're gonna have crying children that don't get presents if it doesn't show up there on time. Daddy, you told me I was getting A and G swag. Waaaa. Exactly right. Armstrong and Getty wrapping up another grueling four hour workday.
- [38:14]
B
So many people to thanks a little time go to Armstrong and Yeti.com, pick up some swag. Check out Katie's Corner, the hot link. Drop us a note if you see something over the weekend we ought to be talking about, send it along. Mailbag@armstrong getty.com as usual, there are a.
- [38:27]
A
Bunch of big stories out there that I can't wait to see how they resolve or get a little more resolved over the weekend. And we'll have you all the updates on that one, so don't pay attention to the news this weekend. Enjoy yourselves. We'll do it for you. We'll see you on Monday. God Bless America.
- [38:45]
Armstrong and Gettysburg all week has ended.
- [38:49]
B
Thanks for tagging along.
- [38:52]
We'll be back on Monday to bomb.
- [38:56]
A
The liars and the cheats who aim to destroy our democracy.
- [39:06]
B
The Armed Strong and Getty show.
- [39:12]
A
The Armstrong and Getty this is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.