Online Fighting--There's No Greater Joy!

Summary

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Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: Online Fighting--There's No Greater Joy!
Date: August 26, 2025
Podcast Host: iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

The central theme of this episode is the humor, awkwardness, and all-too-relatable pain of modern digital interactions—from the perils of texting with unknown contacts to the rabbit hole of online arguments. Jack and Michael (joined by Katie for the main story) share personal anecdotes about miscommunications via text and the combustible drama of social media disputes, ultimately offering wisdom on avoiding these digital traps. The tone is light, self-deprecating, and rich in banter.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Mystery Text Relationship (01:17–05:51)

• Jack reveals he’s had a years-long texting relationship with someone whose identity he doesn't know. The messages are sporadic, friendly, and reference the show or holidays.
• Michael tries to help Jack come up with "clever" ways to discover the sender's identity (like pretending to have a new phone and lost contacts).
  • Quote – Michael: “Next time they text you, you respond back with, hey, I’m really sorry. I just got a new phone and it blew out all of my contacts. Who is this?” (03:28)
• Jack worries that fessing up now would be hurtful, especially if the mystery person is actually someone close to him. The discussion turns into a farce about asking for a driver’s license photo or flat tire rescue.
• Reflection: The bit illustrates how minor social fakery (“just going along with it”) can spiral, making it harder to come clean over time.
  • Quote – Jack: “This is the problem with lying and why it’s a good idea not to, because it always goes further down the road and you end up in a weird position.” (04:42)

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2. Online Fights & Text Combustion (10:22–17:10)

Katie’s Internet Argument Story (10:22–16:49)

• Michael (setting up for Katie): “So arguing online, what is that all about?” (10:22)
• Katie describes getting sucked into an all-day Facebook Messenger argument with a guy she’s only loosely acquainted with—over her asking him to share a GoFundMe for a local business hurt by fire.
  • The man declined due to “policy” and fears about GoFundMe fraud, which Katie took as questioning her integrity.
  • The argument escalated and “spiraled,” lasting all Saturday, until it fizzled with passive-aggressive “have a nice day” exchanges.
    • Quote – Michael (Katie): “We ended up fizzling it out and, you know, kind of giving each other that, yeah, you have a nice day too, with the middle finger.” (12:36)
  • He further baited her with articles about fraudulent GoFundMes, fueling her annoyance.
  • Katie admits hormones may have played a role in how she reacted, but also that the lack of real-world accountability made the escalation easier.

Deconstructing Why These Fights Happen (14:22–17:10)

• Jack shares advice from someone he met: if a text makes your blood boil, "get them on the phone" because tone is missing. Many text blow-ups are just misread intentions.
  • Quote – Jack: “Text has no tone. I mean, you can misread the tone of a text so much...I kind of like that as a rule of thumb: from now on, if I find myself starting to get charged up over a text, I need to calm down and make sure that's actually what the text says or what they meant before I get all bent out of shape over it.” (14:22)
• Michael agrees that he would have benefited from this wise advice before his own meltdown.
• Jack notes how online disagreements among smart, successful people can devolve into pointless personal insults, and that this is a universal feature of human nature.
  • Quote – Jack: “It devolves so quickly from the original topic into just, you know, ‘and the horse you rode in on’ or whatever the insults are. And it’s just amazing that we have that part of our human nature.” (15:36)
• The crew agrees: attempt to clarify tone before reacting, and don’t let the medium drag you into unnecessary drama.
  • Quote – Jack: “If you start to get...react to a text or tweet or whatever, try to get to the source, get them on the phone or something and find out if that’s actually what they meant, because it quite possibly is not.” (16:05)
  • Michael: “You could cut out the whole drama of it all.” (16:21)

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Notable Quotes

• Michael (to Jack, about handling unknown texter): “Next time they text you, you respond back with, hey, I’m really sorry. I just got a new phone and it blew out all of my contacts. Who is this?” (03:28)
• Jack (on why small lies snowball): “This is the problem with lying and why it’s a good idea not to, because it always goes further down the road and you end up in a weird position.” (04:42)
• Katie (on escalating online arguments): “We ended up fizzling it out and, you know, kind of giving each other that, yeah, you have a nice day too, with the middle finger.” (12:36)
• Jack (on the perils of text communication): “Text has no tone. I mean, you can misread the tone of a text so much...from now on, if I find myself starting to get charged up over a text, I need to calm down and make sure that's actually what the text says or what they meant before I get all bent out of shape over it.” (14:22)
• Jack (on the lure of online fighting): “It devolves so quickly from the original topic into just, you know, ‘and the horse you rode in on’ or whatever the insults are. And it’s just amazing that we have that part of our human nature.” (15:36)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Texting with a Mystery Contact: 01:17–05:51
• Transition to Online Arguments: 10:22
• Katie’s Story of an Internet Fight: 10:31–13:45
• Lessons on Tone and Text Wars: 14:22–17:10

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Memorable Moments

• Jack’s sheepish admission of an 8–10 year ongoing “unknown texter” friendship.
• Michael’s comedically elaborate (and subtly “devious”) suggestions for outing the texter.
• Katie’s honest, humorous breakdown of how a seemingly simple favor request morphed into a digital feud—complete with late-night messages and passive-aggressive emojis.
• The group’s realization that digital communications are a breeding ground for unnecessary drama, and their collective vow (however lighthearted) to handle text conflicts more maturely moving forward.

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Takeaway

The episode blends self-effacing humor with smart observations about digital life: Sometimes it’s best to just pick up the phone or let go of online fights—before you find yourself in an absurd, weeks-long argument or still wondering, years later, "Who is this texting me?"

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Transcript

[Michael]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Jack]

Ah, come on.

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[Michael]

There's no greater joy. It's one more thing. Armstrong and Getty.

[Jack]

One more thing before we get to Katie's story. I just got a text from someone. I have a texting relationship with somebody that I have no idea who they are.

[Michael]

Like a texting relationship that could be a lot of things.

[Jack]

I might have a real relationship with them. I just, I just don't know who it is. It's somebody who texts me from a number. I don't have a name attached to it. And, and they'll like comment on things they heard on the show or say what you got planned this weekend for the big three day weekend or whatever. I'll just say not much. How about you? You know, and, and I don't have any idea who it is. And I've been doing this for, with this person for. They don't text a lot.

[Michael]

About how often it is. Not a lot.

[Jack]

It'll go, it goes in bursts. Like there probably been three in the last week. And then there might be months before I hear from them again.

[Michael]

Okay.

[Jack]

And then, and then they'll text me a few times again. I have no idea who it is. And it's been going on for eight, ten years. I mean a really long time.

[Michael]

It's me, Jack. I do it during commercial. Oh, that would be even better if it was Michael after all.

[Jack]

But that's what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid of it. Somebody like. Like I know really well. And if I. If I say all of a sudden, it'd be weird to say it at this point after eight years, I just gotta fess up. I don't have any idea who you are.

[Michael]

Who am I?

[Jack]

I mean, because that would be hurtful. And especially if it's somebody like. It might be the lady that answers the phone at the tax. At the insurance place where I get my car insurance. I'll just use that for an example. Same lady has been dealing with me for my car insurance for 15 years. Yeah, I don't know her name. Or I do know her name, but I don't know her number.

[Michael]

But you guys, you wouldn't be on a texting relationship like that, right?

[Jack]

No. Well, I don't know. People get your number through weird ways. I don't know. I don't have any idea who this. They sent me a text today about how good the show was, and I have an idea.

[Michael]

Are you ready? Next time they text you, you respond back with, hey, I'm really sorry. I just got a new phone and it blew out all of my contacts. Who is this?

[Jack]

That's great. That is the sort of cleverness women come up with.

[Michael]

Say, that is manipulative type stuff.

[Jack]

Devious. Devious. That is really good.

[Michael]

Yeah, so just let this. This little round fizzle, and then the next time they text you, be like, new phone. Who dis?

[Jack]

Brand new phone. All my contacts I'm having to do this with. Sorry about that. Who is this?

[Michael]

Yeah, it's gonna be somebody you just hate.

[Jack]

I was gonna go with, I've got a flat tire. Here I am alongside the road. Could you come help me? And then wait and see who shows up.

[Michael]

Could you by chance send a picture of your driver's license just so I could, you know, trying to compare something.

[Jack]

That's it. I'm trying to verify all my contacts. If you could send a picture of your driver's license front and back, that would be very handy for me.

[Michael]

Yeah, we're running you through E Verified just, you know. Oh, that's so fun. See, you said 8 to 10, and I was thinking months. Years, Jack, as you said, sir. What are you doing?

[Jack]

This is the problem with lying and why it's a good idea not to, because it always goes further down the road and you end up in a weird position. So by lying the first time, the first several years, I guess, of pretending I know who it is, then it gets too awkward to try to fix it after that.

[Michael]

Yeah, you're way too deep now.

[Jack]

There's gotta, I mean, if it's somebody close that is like, really helped me a lot through the years. It's really gonna hurt their feelings.

[Michael]

Right?

[Jack]

Oh, so all this time you were texting back, you know, you have a good Y2K also or whatever. I don't remember how long this has been going on. That darn Obama. However long this has been going on, they'll think, well, you're just, you weren't. This wasn't real. This wasn't a real connection we have.

[Michael]

No, no, just bullshitting your way through it, Jack, what you were doing exactly.

[Jack]

Oh, well, if they listen to the podcast, they'll probably reach out. Is that me?

[Michael]

Oh, I wonder, I wonder how many people will text you after this and be like, hey, now wait a minute.

[Jack]

Yeah.

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[Jack]

Oh, man, what a. What a. What is that? Something web we weave whenever, when we first we practice to deceive. It's very, very tr. So arguing online, what is that all about?

[Michael]

Katie, I can't even believe that I got into this this weekend and it was with somebody that I'm somewhat familiar with. We have kind of a broadcasting relationship, if you will. And I had asked this person to post a link for me to. And I know that, like, sharing GoFundMe is sketch, right? I understand that once you start sharing one, you got to share them all. But I had created a GoFundMe for a business in my hometown that was really devastated by a fire. And these guys do a lot for our community. So I had contacted this page and said, hey, would you mind sharing it? And I don't know. And I, I completely will own this. I don't know if it was actually insulting what he said or if my hormones are just going nuts because it could totally be one of the two. Right?

[Jack]

But possible.

[Michael]

The way that he came back at me and was like, we have a policy and we've dealt with fraud gofundmes before, so I'm gonna have to turn you down. And my brain went, wait a minute.

[Jack]

That'S a little, that's a little cold.

[Michael]

It was, it was. That wasn't word for word, but it was along that tone. And I just, I looked at it and for some reason my brain went, this mfer is questioning my integrity right now. He is wondering if I, I'm going to send somebody who I've known for years, I'm going to send him this. Anyway, we end up going back and forth for a few times where I'm just going, you know what, dude, don't worry about it. I'll figure out another way to handle this page. It doesn't have to come back to you. But he wouldn't stop messaging me after that. Like, doubling down and doubling down.

[Jack]

Right.

[Michael]

I'm not a good loser. So now I'm doubling down back. This went on all of Saturday.

[Jack]

Wow.

[Michael]

All. I mean, I was out and about doing other things, but, you know, my phone would take me, like, hang on, it's the dick. And I'd pick my phone up, you know, get into it, and Drew's looking at me like, you've lost it. You've gone off the deep end. Anyway, it ended up. We ended up fizzling it out and, you know, kind of giving each other that. Yeah, you have a nice day, too, with the middle finger.

[Jack]

Really? You actually.

[Michael]

No, I told him, have a nice day. You take care now. Like that, you know, with a thumbs up emoji, though, because I didn't want to use the middle finger, so I went with the thumbs up because that's the next best.

[Jack]

Yeah.

[Michael]

And then after I said that, another message at 1:45 in the morning. So I finally just wrote back, listen, I am not. This is not gonna take over my Sunday as well, but I got roped into an Internet fight, which I rarely do.

[Jack]

Right? Yeah, I don't either, but it's.

[Michael]

But it was this weird. Like, I don't know that if I walked by this guy because I've interacted with him a couple, I don't know that I'd recognize him. But for some reason. So on Saturday, he had my undivided attention.

[Jack]

What did he continue to. And there are three of us on this show who have had pregnant wives. So we can attest to the fact that a woman who's going through the whole pregnancy or getting pregnant or whatever period of her life, you do not to get into arguments with. You just do not. But. But in what way would he, this guy, continue it? I mean, once you said, that's fine, I'll find some other place to do it, and tried to drop it. How did he continue to engage?

[Michael]

It was. So he explained himself. And then I was like, all right, dude, whatever. You know me, but I get where you're coming from. We'll just move past it. And then what should have ended there, he started sending me links to fraudulent GoFundMe articles.

[Jack]

Right?

[Michael]

And I'm like, okay, I don't need any of this. And I Now I feel. Now I feel like you're even more telling me that you think I'm gonna send you something fraud. So it just. It, dude, it just spiraled. And I remember I was sitting on the floor Saturday, and that's When I went, I have to. I have to text the guys. This is insane. So that was when I sent the text to you guys. I was so red hot pissed. It was another level.

[Jack]

The problem is, and I recently met an adult who told me this, and they were absolutely right. They do not. If they find themselves starting to react to a text, they always talk themselves down, saying, I need to get on the phone with them or something. Because text has no tone. I mean, there's just. You can misread the tone of a text so much. I've had it both ways. Where I, like, completely misread something as sarcasm that was straight or vice versa. Something that. That they were. That they were trying to be sarcastic. And I read it as straight and so was insulted. I mean, and it can go both directions so easily. And I kind of like that. As a rule of thumb, from now on, if I find myself starting to get charged up over a text, I need to calm down and make sure that's actually what the text says or what they meant before I get all bent out of shape over it.

[Michael]

Where were you with these wide, wise words on Saturday morning, Jack? While I was blowing a gasket? I got. It was totally. And I reiterated this to him, and I've said it here, but, like, this absolutely could have been 100% on me, but the way it typed out and the way it read to me, it was like, oh, it's on, dude.

[Jack]

Yeah, man. And once I. I don't know that I've ever engaged in that, but I've certainly witnessed them between friends of mine. I've seen friends of mine on Twitter get into battles and they just can't let it go. And like, two successful, smart people get into it, and it devolves so quickly from the original topic into just, you know, and the horse you wrote in on or whatever the insults are. And it's just amazing that. That we have that part of our human nature.

[Michael]

Yeah.

[Jack]

So hard to do. But again, if you take anything away from this podcast, I think this is a good one. This should be on bumper stickers. If you start to get. React to a text or tweet or whatever, try to get to the source, get them on the phone or something and find out if that's actually what they meant, because it quite possibly is not.

[Michael]

Yeah. You could cut out the whole drama of it all.

[Jack]

Yeah. But that's a tough one.

[Michael]

And the other element of it was, I think, the continuation of the conversation. I was also. I was very blessed that this was not on like a public wall. This happened on messenger. So I only. I'm the one who's embarrassed by my. My own self. But, you know, I see these fights all the time on Facebook and all that. And you're right, they completely spiral into stupidity every time.

[Jack]

Yep. Yeah. And the whole. I'll. I'll let you have the last word. Oh, you know, and then they'll let you. You get the last word. And then they say one more thing. Just short thing. Of course you do. Or something like that.

[Michael]

Right?

[Jack]

Of course you do.

[Michael]

Sure. Every time. Anyway, so that was my Saturday.

[Jack]

Oh, boy. Let's all learn that lesson. Let's not react to text until we know what the intent was. That's what we've learned today, Michael. All these years and Jack didn't know it was me. Well, I guess that's it. Oh, boy. Ah, come on.

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[Unidentified Male Voice 2]

This thing is ancient.

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[Jack]

Whoa.

[Unidentified Male Voice 2]

This thing moves.

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[Jack]

Song stands about an obsessed fan who's.

[Michael]

Taking me too literal from Eminem and.

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[Michael]

Never seen anything like Eminem fans.

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[Michael]

I had to look in the mirror and be like, am I one of.

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[Jack]

I traveled the world for him.

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Without Eminem, I wouldn't have the life.

[Jack]

I have right now. What's your first question?

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[Jack]

Cool.

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