Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: Our Hippopotamuses Are Shrinking?!
Date: April 3, 2026
Hosts: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty

Episode Overview

This episode dives into the impact of modern technology—specifically smartphones, navigation apps, and automation—on human cognition, memory, and attention span, riffing humorously on the “shrinking hippopotamuses” (a playful misstatement for the hippocampus). The hosts also discuss Harvard’s proposed grading reforms, political discourse online, LGBTQ+ terminology and ideology, Medicare fraud, recent Moon mission news, and more. Their signature blend of satire, skepticism, and genuine concern keeps the conversation edgy and engaging.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Technology and the Human Brain

(03:07–08:23)

• Smartphone Withdrawal: Joe shares how abstaining from his iPhone for two weeks brought "friction" back into life. Using a flip phone was challenging but revealing.
  • “It was really excruciating at first… But then we went back and the brain tests were really staggering. Even the experts are surprised by the difference.” — Joe Getty [03:32]
• Shrinking Hippocampus: The hosts reference studies linking constant GPS use to shrinking hippocampuses (the memory-forming brain area).
  • “Your hippocampus...shrinking. Because we use Google Maps, we don't navigate the world the way our ancestors did.” — Joe Getty [03:41]
  • Average adult attention span has dropped from 2.5 minutes to 47 seconds since the year 2000.
  • Jack jokes: “Our hippopotamus is shrinking.” [03:54]
• Overreliance on Navigation: Personal anecdotes about people using GPS to get even a few blocks home.
  • “He used GPS every single day to get to work and to get back home… three blocks from the radio station.” — Joe Getty [05:29]
  • Jack and Joe reflect on the dangers of not using our minds for simple tasks: “Use it or lose it.” [06:43]
• Automation and Self-Driving Cars:
  • Joe admits: “I haven’t heard from many people who use self-driving all the time like I do. I use it every single day.” [06:54]
  • “It's changing our brains. You're gonna hear more about that as more people get self-driving. It's…not good.” — Joe Getty [07:17]
  • “It'd be like me having a robot… What do you think that would do to my arms?” — Jack Armstrong [07:38]

2. Harvard’s Grade Inflation Controversy

(10:13–16:43)

• The Policy Proposal: Harvard plans to cap A grades at 20% per course to combat spiraling grade inflation.
• “For years Harvard has been handing out A’s like their participation trophies.” — Jack Armstrong [11:26]
• By the Numbers: Sixty percent of all Harvard grades were A’s last year, up from 25% in 2005.
  • “In the last two decades they went from a quarter of the people to get A's to the majority. Easily get A's.” — Joe Getty [12:40]
• Student Backlash: Most students (94%) oppose the measure.
  • “Now they're customers at an expensive resort.” — Jack Armstrong [14:27]
• Why Grade Inflation? Pressure from parents and desire for higher teacher ratings cited as reasons.
  • “I don't want to argue with some parent over why their genius got a B. Screwed. I'm giving them an A.” — Jack Armstrong [14:13]
• Bigger Picture: How “everyone gets a trophy” culture shapes expectations and resilience.
• Notable Quote: “We want to liberate students from the tyranny of the 4.0 and make them free to explore.” — Harvard prof, paraphrased by Jack [16:14]

3. Political Discourse & Social Media Outbursts

(08:23–09:42)

• Politicians and Profanity: Congresswoman Susie Lee’s F-bomb-laced social media post about Trump and the Supreme Court makes headlines.
  • “So effing effed up. I'll pray they F him to his face. Sorry, I say F a lot these days.” — Jack quoting Lee [09:09]
  • Lee later defends herself, claiming she was “touched by the attacks on our Constitution.” [09:18]
  • Hosts and staffer Katie joke about alcohol being the real reason: “Sounds like your nerves were touched by vodka.” — Katie [09:33]
• Return Culture: Comedic asides about online shopping returns and personal procrastination.

4. Medicare/Hospice Fraud Scandal

(27:29–31:38)

• Fraud in the News: A California couple arrested for $7.5 million in fraudulent hospice claims.
  • “In this particular case, the flags included a five-year survival rate of 97%—high for what is supposed to be end-of-life care.” — Jack Armstrong [27:38]
• “You can do endless stories about taxpayer money being stolen, and nobody gets worked up enough. We just put up with it.” — Joe Getty [29:24]
• Cynicism and Politics: Hosts reflect on systemic government corruption and lack of accountability.
  • “Government is a for-profit enterprise... The profit is the pay. The profit is siphoning money to your cronies and getting favors and board positions.” — Jack Armstrong [30:54]

5. Moon Mission Updates

(44:56–48:10)

• Artemis 2 Launch: NASA successfully sends astronauts around the Moon.
  • “Humanity has once again shown what we are capable of.” — NASA [44:56]
  • Hosts marvel at how clear the communications are compared to Apollo.
    • “Other than a little background hiss, it sounds like they're in the same room.” — Jack Armstrong [46:10]
• Astronaut Details: Peek into astronaut life—exercise routines, menu (beef brisket, mango salad), and sleep cycles.
  • “The crew started their second day after sleeping in four-hour shifts and exercising on a flywheel… even mango salad and couscous with nuts.” — Joe Getty [47:09]
• Joking on Space: “Get a cup of coffee and then you're all excited about it. Come on. Who wants to do some experiments?” — Jack Armstrong [47:52]

6. LGBTQ+ Discourse, Queer Theory, and Gavin Newsom’s Online Behavior

(32:43–41:27)

• Newsom’s Social Media Tactics: The California governor’s staff accused of using anti-gay jokes and insinuations online against conservative opponents.
  • Example: “We got a call from Grindr after this and said your team was their biggest users.” — Quoting Newsom’s press account [34:21]
• Ben Appel Editorial: Explains the distinction between being “gay” and “queer” in the context of academic theory and activism.
  • “I am gay, but I am not queer. My sexuality doesn't obligate me to embrace a particular ideology or reject the moral inheritance of the society that made my life possible.” — Ben Appel, read by Jack [40:27]
  • Critical theory treats norms as power structures; “queer” defined as anything at odds with the normal, legitimate, or dominant.
  • “The members of Queers for Palestine know that Hamas would imprison or execute them for their sexuality. But they share a common enemy: Israel and America…” — Ben Appel, paraphrased [39:50]
  • “My favorite point: Progress happens by acknowledging shared human values and working within our reality rather than declaring war on it.” — Jack [41:00]
• Recommendation: Brief shoutout to James Lindsay and the book Cynical Theories for deeper understanding.

7. Sports and Health Anecdotes

(20:44–21:49)

• Luka Doncic’s NBA injury and its potential impact on the Lakers’ playoffs.
• Injuries: hamstring and Achilles tendon talk with real-life examples and health technology (wheeled knee walkers).

8. Other Topical Bits & Satire

• Skewering “everyone gets a trophy” culture.
• Poking fun at progressive social strategy and left-wing hypocrisy.
• Jokes about the use of the word “defecate” on the program [32:31].
• Ending the show with comedic asides about conspiracy theories regarding the Moon landing and recommendations for the show's podcast version.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Our hippopotamus is shrinking.” — Jack Armstrong [03:54], playing on “hippocampus” to humorous effect
• “You got to use your brain. Use it or lose it.” — Jack Armstrong [06:43]
• “Sit there with your skinny little Timothee Chalamet arms hanging at your side while a robot puts food in your mouth.” — Joe Getty [08:15]
• “For years Harvard has been handing out A’s like their participation trophies.” — Jack Armstrong [11:26]
• “We want to liberate students from the tyranny of the 4.0 and make them free to explore.” — Harvard committee via Jack [16:14]
• “Government is a for-profit enterprise. It's like the Clinton Foundation.” — Jack Armstrong [30:54]
• “I am gay, but I am not queer… Progress happens by acknowledging shared human values and working within our reality rather than declaring war on it.” — Ben Appel, read by Jack [40:27]
• “If you missed a segment, the podcast: Armstrong and Getty On Demand.” — Joe Getty [48:32], plugging their show

Timestamps by Segment

• 03:07–08:23: Effects of smartphones, navigation, and automation on memory and attention
• 10:13–16:43: Harvard grading reform debate and what’s driving grade inflation
• 20:44–21:49: Sports injuries (NBA & real-life health stories)
• 27:29–31:38: Medicare/hospice fraud and government accountability
• 32:43–41:27: LGBTQ+ politics, queer theory, Newsom’s messaging, Ben Appel op-ed
• 44:56–48:10: Artemis 2 Moon mission update, astronaut life, hosts’ reactions
• Scattered: Satirical rants, running gags (defecate count, procrastination with returns, conspiracy jokes)

Tone & Style

True to Armstrong & Getty’s trademark mix, the episode swings from biting satire and sarcasm to genuine curiosity and frustration with modern trends. The language is informal, wry, and deeply conversational, with frequent asides and meta-commentary.

Summary Takeaway

If you missed the show, you’ll walk away aware of how technology usage might be literally shrinking your (hippocampus), how grade inflation reflects and reinforces “customer” attitudes in higher ed, and how debates about identity and ideology—whether in Ivy League classrooms or on political Twitter—keep getting more complicated, and more absurd. Meanwhile, humanity’s still shooting for the moon—with brisket and couscous on the menu.