Seasonal Gremlins

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: Seasonal Gremlins

Date: March 17, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this St. Patrick’s Day episode, Armstrong & Getty (Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty), along with Katie Green and Michael, engage in a lighthearted yet sharp discussion on the growing complexity and commercialization of holidays, particularly St. Patrick’s Day. They quickly pivot to pressing international headlines—the ongoing war in the Middle East, divisions among U.S. allies, media coverage biases, and shifts in American public opinion. The conversation is peppered with both dry wit and pointed cultural critique, maintaining the show’s characteristic blend of irreverence and seriousness.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Absurdity of Modern St. Patrick’s Day Traditions

• The hosts muse about the gradual cluttering of once-simple holidays with parentally-imposed magical creatures, focusing on the rise of the “leprechaun trap” and the phenomenon of staging leprechaun “mischief” for children.
• Notable Quote:
  • “I didn’t know I had to do leprechauns until I had kids…In St. Patrick's Day, I'd have to stay up just like Christmas and Easter and do all this different stuff and sprinkle green sparkly stuff around the toilet.” – Jack Armstrong (04:03)
  • “Without creating some sort of fantasy theme park for seasonal gremlins.” – Joe Getty (06:08)
• The group jokes about escalations in childhood holiday traditions, comparing them to Santa and the Easter Bunny.
• All agree that while playful, many of these traditions feel forced and burdensome to parents.
• Memorable Moment: The group cracks up about “leprechaun pee”—a trend of dyeing the toilet water green—and the loop of ever-expanding parental duties. (04:44–06:15)

2. Cultural Reflection: Is St. Patrick’s Day a Meaningful Holiday?

• The conversation veers into how little genuine engagement there is with Irish culture, history, or meaning.
  • “What percentage…of consideration of Irish culture and history is there in the average St. Patrick's Day gathering?” – Joe Getty (03:40)
  • “Zero.” – Jack Armstrong (03:58)
• They critique the superficiality of modern celebrations and faux engagement with heritage.

3. International Headlines: War in the Middle East & US Division

• Top Stories Covered (07:37–18:00):
  • US, Israel, Iran, and wider Middle East conflict: Recent Iranian leaders killed; multiple overlapping wars (Iran, Israel, Russia/Ukraine, Pakistan/Afghanistan).
  • US political/media landscape is deeply polarized, with coverage split starkly along partisan lines.
  • Civil society “siloed,” with Americans’ perceptions of conflicts varying dramatically according to news sources and algorithms.
  • “It's as if the DNC and the RNC were running all of the coverage.” – Joe Getty (08:27)
  • “If you just kind of follow the news through the algorithm that gets sent to you, you’re gonna believe what you’re being fed.” – Jack Armstrong (11:03)
• Discussion of waning US public support for Israel, as shown in recent polls, and the implications for US foreign policy and aid.

4. Headlines Rundown with Katie Green (14:16–18:41)

• Katie offers a quick-fire round-up of major news:
  • Iran’s security chief killed (ABC)
  • Tensions in China and the Middle East
  • Anti-Semitic attack in San Jose
  • Iranian women’s soccer captain returns home after family disappears
  • Trump’s latest pronouncements about Cuba and military action
  • Societal trends: More gyms than retail stores (WSJ); impact of online gambling on the news; Ozempic changing attitudes towards alcohol
  • Humorous headline: Babylon Bee’s Clinton/TSA joke

5. The Challenge of Building Alliances in War (19:29–27:35)

• The hosts dig into shifting alliances and US-European relationships amid the Gulf conflict.
• Germany and the UK are reluctant to send military support; hostilities seem increasingly “America alone.”
  • “We have said this from day one…We will not be drawn into the wider war.” – Quoted speech, Germany/Britain position (19:38)
  • “Good thing the president hasn't antagonized allies with tariffs or threats to invade Greenland.” – Joe Getty, summarizing a WSJ editorial (20:32)
• Trump’s unpredictable style: He refuses late British aid, rails against European “allies,” and claims US military self-sufficiency.
  • “We don't need your aircraft carriers after we've already won. The British Prime Minister says the concern is a wider war.” – Jack Armstrong, relating Trump’s stance (21:32)

6. The “House Divided” & US Media Critique

• Extended metaphor from Lincoln: “A house divided against itself cannot stand.” Both hosts extend this to Americans’ complete media siloing.
• Frustration at performative, partisan news coverage that leaves no room for nuanced debate or reconciliation (23:43–24:51).

7. The Human Cost: Iranian Women’s Soccer Team (31:55–33:06)

• Return to a standout story: An Iranian women’s soccer team member accepts asylum in Australia, but returns home after family members disappear in Iran.
  • “These women are going to be tortured and murdered…That is what’s going to happen to them when they get back.” – Jack Armstrong (32:27)
• Hosts express shock that stories like this don’t receive more advocacy from progressive spaces, especially Hollywood and academia.
  • “That’s how twisted they are over Trump.” – Joe Getty (33:06)

8. Freedom-Loving Quote & Reflections on War (33:38–34:49)

• In honor of St. Patrick’s Day, the “freedom-loving quote” juxtaposes the necessity and horror of war.
  • “The surest way to prevent war is not to fear it.” – John Randolph
  • “Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform. He only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder.” – Percy Bysshe Shelley

9. Listener Mailbag & Final Thoughts (34:49–37:30)

• Listeners weigh in on:
  • The nature of the US’s “hardest punch” against Iran—how much more could/should be done.
  • Trump’s approach as purely transactional, not relational—with allusions to “The Art of the Deal.”
• Ending reflection: The current moment is unstable, with the landscape of international cooperation, American society, and media deeply unsettled.

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Notable Quotes & Segments

• On St. Patrick’s Day Parenting:
  • “The cleanup was the hardest of any of the holidays. It took me like hours to clean all.” – Jack Armstrong (06:29)
• On Media Silos:
  • “People are so siloed, they just again, get nothing but spin for their news. And so their perceptions of the world are so wildly different. I don't know how we come together.” – Joe Getty (10:23)
• On the Iranian Women’s Soccer Team:
  • “That's a terrible story… These women are going to be tortured and murdered. That is what's going to happen to them when they get back.” – Jack Armstrong (32:27)
• On War & Allies:
  • “If I was a German politician…we scrabble a little bit, we offer, you know, moral support…The strait gets opened up again, the gas prices drop again. That looks pretty attractive to me as a cowardly German politician, for instance.” – Joe Getty (24:14)
• On Trump’s Diplomacy:
  • “He's probably expecting Germany to say, ‘All right, you need our help. We need you to knock down the tariffs and buy more Mercedes Benzes.’ And Trump would go, ‘Okay, that’s fine.’ He's not about friends. He's about transactions.” – Joe Getty (36:19)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:42–02:58 – St. Patrick’s Day, Outfits & Traditions
• 03:40–07:03 – Holiday Absurdity & Leprechauns
• 07:37–12:43 – War, World Headlines & Media Siloing
• 14:16–18:41 – Katie Green’s Headlines Rundown
• 19:29–27:35 – Allies Balk at US War Efforts
• 31:55–33:06 – Iranian Women’s Soccer Team Forced Home
• 33:38–34:49 – Quotes About War & Human Nature
• 34:49–37:30 – Listener Mail & Thoughts on the Art of the Deal Diplomacy

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Episode Tone & Style

• Tone: Witty, critical, skeptical, sometimes irreverent
• Style: Conversational, spontaneous, with moments of poignant seriousness

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Summary

“Seasonal Gremlins” showcases Armstrong & Getty’s signature blend of humor, cultural commentary, and sharp analysis of current events. The hosts dissect the way holidays have become commercialized and labor-intensive, then rapidly shift to piercing discussions about the Middle East conflict and the fractured state of both US politics and media. The episode is rich with quotable moments, pointed critiques of modern culture, and thoughtful engagement with messy, real-world issues—all while keeping listeners both entertained and informed.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[C]

Broadcasting live from the Abraham Lincoln radio studio, the George Washington Broadcast Center, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty. Armstrong and Getty. And now here's Armstrong and Getty. Live from Studio C. Hey, senior.

[A]

A dim, dimly lit room deep within the bowels of the Armstrong and Getty communications compound. And today we're under the tutelage of our general. Oh, I'm sorry. We're toiling under the title of our show.

[C]

Life expectancy for Iran's leaders declines from 76 years to three days or Lincoln was right and we're in trouble.

[A]

Lincoln was right and we're in trouble.

[C]

A house divided against itself cannot stand.

[A]

Oh, boy. Heavy, man. That's a little too heavy for St. Patrick's Day, don't you think?

[C]

It's a culture, not a costume.

[A]

It almost snuck up on me as I don't have little kids anymore. Just like I. I don't know. I came across it this morning. I thought, holy crap, do I even own a green shirt anymore? I don't know if I do. So I found one of this marginally green, kind of army green.

[C]

Yeah. Michael and Katie didn't believe me, but I am accidentally wearing this flaming green quarter zip.

[A]

Yeah, that's just a coincidence.

[C]

It was chilly this morning in the kitchen. It was on the chair. I was like, oh, yeah, that's perfect. So grab it.

[A]

It's like the classic St. Patrick's Day green color or.

[C]

What is it, Katie? It's the luck of the Irish.

[D]

It is the luck of the Irish.

[A]

So Katie's wearing a green shirt on. What's yours say?

[D]

Mine says most likely to start the shenanigans.

[C]

That's great.

[A]

That's fantastic. And then, Michael, because you hate the Irish, for some reason you didn't wear anything.

[C]

I had no IDEA it was St Patrick's Day until I found out this morning.

[D]

Because you hate the Irish.

[A]

No, it just didn't occur to me.

[C]

And I don't have kids.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Should we get back on the potato plantations or whatever? I'm a little vague on the history. Or wow.

[D]

Catch the boat back, you know?

[C]

Right, exactly.

[A]

No dogs are Irishman welcome in Michael's world.

[C]

Right. Wow. Hate. This is what we're seeing here, folks, is hate. Anti Irish bigotry.

[A]

All right, I'll listen to you too today. Where does this, where does this rank on our stupidest holidays? I'm using my finger.

[C]

Oh, it's way up there. Way up there. It's way up toward the top. Yes, it is. Is there. What percentage, and I'm serious now, of consideration of Irish culture and history is there in the average St. Patrick's Day gathering?

[A]

Zero.

[C]

Zero is the answer.

[A]

Negative. Yes would be the answer.

[C]

Right?

[A]

Yeah. And then I remember. I don't know if you know this, Katie. Maybe you do, maybe this happened when you were a kid. But somewhere between my youth, when St. Patrick's Day was not really a thing at home for me or any of my friends, and then when my kids were little, another make believe person was invented. So because I had to do Santa Claus as a parent and I did the Easter Bunny, I didn't know I had to do leprechauns until I had kids and found out everybody else's kids were doing this. So in St. Patrick's Day, I'd have to stay up just like Christmas and Easter and do all this different stuff and sprinkle green sparkly stuff around the toilet.

[C]

I swear, this is only you. No, no, nobody else. Every.

[A]

Everybody I know did that. No, they didn't. Yes, they did.

[C]

I know. Did that leprechaun peed in your toilet?

[A]

Yes.

[D]

Yeah, I have friends that have the little leprechauns and they put the green footprints out and the little pile of

[A]

gold coins on the counter.

[C]

Nobody has like reindeer fur scattered around their toilet. Look, Santa took a crap.

[D]

Kids, that sets perverse.

[A]

Look, Santa took a crap.

[C]

I mean, if you want to have the leprechaun, like heat cookies or something, that's fine. But why is that great to.

[D]

You should put some food Dye in the toilet. Make it look like green pea.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yes. And I took that from a friend. I didn't. I didn't invent that.

[D]

Brilliant.

[A]

Oh, my God. The leprechaun. Oh. And then you build a leprechaun trap. You know, box with something on a

[C]

stick so you can enslave him. Great. Yeah. Just like the Irish people sharecropping for the Brits. Yeah.

[A]

Every year I was hoping we'd actually catch a leprechaun. I could make it do my laundry or. Or something. They always got away. Leprechaun slaves.

[C]

Wow. Wow. White privilege. This is the ugly face of white privilege.

[A]

But when I found out there was a third magical beast that I had to bow down to as a parent, I was surprised because I didn't know anything about that.

[C]

Because you don't have enough to do, Right?

[A]

Exactly.

[C]

Without creating some sort of fantasy theme park for seasonal gremlins.

[A]

Well, it looks.

[C]

Seasonal gremlins.

[A]

Well, it looked really cool. And the kids were always just thrilled. They'd see the little footprints through the house, and then, oh, my God, he peed in the toilet. And there's green glitter because apparently they urinate.

[C]

Glitter.

[A]

I don't know how their kidneys work.

[C]

No kidding.

[A]

I don't know. The kidneys of a leprechaun works and. And then all this stuff. But the cleanup was the hardest of any of the holidays. It took me, like, hours to clean all.

[C]

Oh, goodness. You don't need that. Plus, you used permanent paint, which was a problem.

[A]

Well, I didn't think I had.

[D]

Yeah, none of that happened when I was a kid. This is all.

[A]

It was invented somewhere in between, and I don't know. And maybe it's regional. I have no idea. All I know is everybody, all the parents in my kids classes did that. And I couldn't have my kids going to school and say, my parents don't do anything fun. There was no leprechaun pee.

[C]

Hey, schools, maybe teach the kids to read.

[A]

Oh, man. I feel like we got to start the show officially so that we can say something at least about the headlines of the day, which there are many. It was quite a day in the Middle east overnight. I'm Jack Armstrong. He's Joe Getty on this. It is. How did it already get to be Tuesday, March 17, traditionally known as St. Patrick's Day, the year 2026. We're Armstrong and Getty, and we approve of this program.

[C]

Let's begin then, officially, according to FCC rules and regulations. Here we go at Mark He.

[A]

Welcomes the leader of Ireland to the White house to mark St. Patrick's Day.

[C]

In addition to a special lunch up

[A]

on Capitol Hill for Ireland, the president will be presented with a bowl of shamrocks. The White House going all in on this holiday. We'll see if the president brings out his green tide. Oh, boy,

[C]

this is a country at war. Keep in mind. Yes, yes.

[A]

I thought that last night when I was watching the news, I realized this is a big winter storm. But man, it's wintertime and there are winter storms and we are at war and no telling what direction it's going to go straight. A Hormuz is closed down more or less. It seems like the lead story to me over a snowstorm in the winter. But what do I know? Maybe, maybe they're just judging the fact that most people are weren't paying attention before it started and since it started, they're still like, I have no interest. I don't know.

[C]

I think there may be back to the House divided theme. There may be a bit of an uncertainty as to how to report it among the mindless lemmings of the media because as you and others have observed, it seems to be entirely negative or entirely positive that it's as if the DNC and the RNC were running all of the coverage. And so if you're trying to run a even close to a serious news program and just report on the facts and you are a lemming, it's gotta be hard for them to know, you know, how to report it.

[A]

Exactly. I was watching MSNBC a little this morning and their news coverage is as if we all have agreed already that this is a disaster. It was a terrible idea. It's. Everybody recognizes it from the start. It has been a disaster and a terrible idea. Now what do we do about it? Which I'm positive is not the case.

[C]

Certainly not. No.

[A]

And then not pointing out any of the possible drawbacks really on Fox. So you don't have much in between. Israel says they killed a couple of top leaders for Iran overnight and Iran continues to attack their neighbors and our embassy in Iraq and lots of different places. And then to me, and I don't know if this is significant or not, pretty major attack on Afghanistan by Pakistan overnight because they are at war. That killed quite a few people. And I don't know how much Afghanistan's ability is to wage war. They eventually drove us out of the country. But Pakistan is a serious country with nuclear weapons and everything like that. So that separate war with Russia at war with Ukraine and then all like 11 different countries involved in a war around Iran. Seems like a lot of war.

[C]

Yeah, absolutely. The war inside the country is the one that's really got my attention. We had been saying for years, well, Jack would often ask, do you think we can ever get any sort of national unity again? And the answer was always, well, maybe some sort of cataclysm like a major war or a pandemic. While we tried the pandemic, no good, in fact, it made it worse. And now, apparently partly because of the way information flows in the modern world, probably entirely for that reason, people are so siloed, they just again, get nothing but spin for their news. And so their perceptions of the world are so wildly different. I don't know how we come together.

[A]

That's always worth remembering. It's not, it's not the fault of people necessarily. Unless you take the time to really reach out there to different sources for news to try to figure out what's going on. Like it's a homework assignment. If you just kind of follow the news that through the algorithm that gets sent to you, you know, you're gonna believe what you're being fed. And how would you believe anything else? Why would you? Right. And you can't guarantee people are going to take the time to seek out all kinds of alternate sources on every story to see what actually happened. I don't know how that's gonna work out.

[C]

No, I'm reminded in a way of certain things I believed going into college many, many years ago. And I believe them firmly because I'd heard them repeated many, many times and really heard no dissent. And then I ran into a couple of professors who were, well, for one thing, constitutional conservatives who said, no, that's actually not true. This is, and here's why. And it took roughly five minutes to completely change my mind because it was so clearly true. But if you never challenge those ideas, how are you going to change them? Yeah, we're in an odd spot.

[A]

Uh, yeah. And so there's a poll that came out yesterday, Americans views toward Israel. Wow, Has Israel taken a hit in terms of its support in the United States across every age group over the last few years. And that's going to be a long term problem for them and for our ability to support them, I think. So we got a lot of that stuff. We got all kinds of things to talk about. And Katie's headlines on the way. Hope you can stay here.

[C]

Armstrong and Gettys.

[B]

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[A]

That's W I I M S O

[C]

U N D I was looking up

[A]

at the TV and you got some women up there doing that Irish dancing thing, getting ready to do that at some parade or something. Remember when Irish dancing was all the rage? That was fun for a couple of years.

[C]

Michael Flatley, he was the Lord of

[A]

the Lord of the Dance.

[C]

River dance. Yes.

[A]

That was a big deal for a while. For some reason it just caught on and then it went away. Yeah, well, that happens.

[C]

What's hot now? Spanish dancing? Flamenco? Nobody knows.

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

Let's figure out who's reporting what. It's lead story with Katie Green. Katie.

[D]

Well, the lead on all the Alphabet networks. ABC Israel says Iran's security chief killed in overnight attack. NBC the Iran war throws Trump's China trip into doubt. But Beijing doesn't seem to mind waiting. And CNN US race to counter Iranian drones echoes response to roadside bombs in Iraq and Afghanistan. It's all Iran.

[A]

More related.

[C]

Right? That's fine. Yeah. Yeah.

[D]

New York Post cops bust anti Semitic thugs who attacked Jewish diners at posh San Jose restaurant.

[C]

Yes, we will name names and give you all the details coming up. They found the three young brutal would be terrorists turned themselves in.

[A]

Oh really? I don't know that story. I want to hear it from the Guardian.

[D]

Captain of Iranian woman's football team leaves Australia after initially accepting offer of asylum. Quote, family members are missing.

[A]

How about that? So most of the Iranian soccer women that originally were going to stay in Australia have decided to go back because their families have disappeared.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

That is quite the story.

[C]

That should give her attention. All of them. There are just one or two left, I think.

[A]

Yeah. You know, I heard somebody Point this out. How was there nobody at the Oscars that said anything about that or the plight of Iranian women at all?

[C]

That would seem to be siding with Trump. So they can't do it. We have audio of young women saying, oh, a woman is much better off in Iran than in America. That's how crazy we've gotten.

[A]

Wow.

[D]

From the New York Times. Trump says he will have the honor of taking Cuba.

[C]

Trump has been saying some odd things lately. Think the old man loss of filter syndrome is kicking in and he's never had much of a filter.

[A]

A lot of my favorite thinkers seem to think think that's clearly on his list. It was Venezuela, Iran, Cuba. But Iran could be keeping him busy for quite a while.

[D]

From the Wall Street Journal. America now has more spas and gyms than stores selling actual stuff.

[C]

First time ever.

[A]

That makes sense.

[C]

I don't know how services than goods.

[A]

I was talking about somebody about this the other day. Something I ordered and got there. Got it in like three hours. I don't know how brick and mortar survive at all. And I feel bad about that. I have friends who own brick and mortar orders, but it's just so easy to order stuff and get it fast and often it's cheaper.

[D]

Thought this was interesting. From the Washington Post. A Times of Israel reporter says online gamblers pressured him to change his story about an Iranian missile strike so they could win a payout.

[C]

Oh, boy. And I have an article I've been sitting on for a few days about how intelligence services are looking at those online betting platforms and seeing, for instance, oh, hey, there was just a big bet that the US Would attack something or whatever. I'll bet an insider knows it. So they're mining them for intelligence. That's interesting because people are greedy to make money on their knowledge.

[D]

From the New York Post. I used to be a happy drunk. Ozempic made me a single sad one. And the hangovers are horrendous.

[A]

Changed your relationship with alcohol. I'll be darned.

[D]

I've heard this from a couple of friends who are on it.

[C]

No, the hangovers are worse.

[D]

The hangovers are worse. And it has completely killed their desire to even have a drink. Like with dinner, which a lot of

[C]

people think is a positive.

[D]

Right?

[C]

You know, depends how you look at it. Oh.

[D]

Study finds your brain believes the crowd. Why? Reading bad reviews can make painful experiences feel even worse.

[A]

Fascinating and not surprising. Yeah. The information you get if you hear a bad review of something it's really hard to not have that have an effect on things. Or positive either way.

[D]

And finally, the Babylon Be Bill Clinton selflessly volunteers to help short staffed TSA with pat Downs.

[A]

Geez.

[C]

Come on.

[A]

That was really reaching. That was really Clinton's.

[C]

Really? Wow.

[A]

There are about 50,000 plus TSA people. 50,000 plus a couple hundred quit the other day. So I don't know. That's a big story. But 10% stayed home on Sunday. That's a big number.

[C]

I know this is tried and true to the point of being worn out, but can you imagine if the Republicans were running a partial shutdown, refusing to fund the TSA and the Department of

[A]

Homeland Security according to every news channel I watched today.

[C]

Goodness sakes.

[A]

So it just depends on your point of view. We got so much more news of the day to get to and try to explain. I hope you can stay here.

[C]

Armstrong and Gettysburg.

[A]

Like the United States and Israel, we

[C]

want to see an end to Iran's nuclear and missile programs, but we will

[A]

not take part in this war.

[C]

We have said this from day one.

[A]

That remains the position of the federal government. This also means that as long as the war continues, we will not participate in ensuring freedom of navigation in the Strait of Hormuz by military means. We will not be drawn into the wider war. We cannot allow the war in the Gulf to turn into a windfall for Putin. Well, there's Germany and Great Britain saying we're not in on helping at all with this war. She's a heck of a thing. Trump obviously made no effort to lay any groundwork where they would be on our side. He has antagonized people over a lot of ridiculous things over the last however many months he's been president.

[C]

As the Wall Street Journal editorial board put it, good thing the president hasn't antagonized allies with tariffs or threats to invade Greenland. This is a reminder that treating allies well is wise, so they are more likely to help when you really need them.

[A]

Well, do you think that has anything to do with it?

[C]

100% you do. It might not be the deciding factor, but it's absolutely a factor. Now, if you're talking about Kier, I'd rather have a brick and a rope Starmer. That's a different case than Germany. Okay. The Labour Party in Britain is just so weak.

[A]

Let's hear a little of Trump's response to these European allies. Using my finger quotes that aren't going to help us in Iran, President Trump

[C]

is blasting some key US Allies for

[A]

refusing to answer his new call for help in reopening the critical Strait of Hormuz The President claimed the Ukrainian UK

[C]

was unwilling to help in the beginning.

[A]

President Trump said today the UK is

[C]

now offering aircraft carriers, but that he

[A]

told them it's too late.

[C]

He said, we're going to send over two aircraft carriers.

[A]

I said, I don't want them anymore. I don't want them after we win. I want them before we start. I don't need your aircraft carriers after we've already won. The British Prime Minister says the concern is a wider war and Germany is

[C]

refusing to send help for the Strait

[A]

of Hormuz, saying, quote, it's not our war. Yeah, and we can play some clips of Trump later because he said a lot of things yesterday like, we don't need anybody. We don't need anybody. We're the most powerful military in the world. We don't need you. I always thought this would happen. We're there for you for all these years. That's why I hate NATO. We're here for you all these years. We got troops in your country, and now we need you, and you won't help. We don't need you anyway, so screw you. He didn't say to screw you apart, but that was the tone.

[C]

On the same day, he said, numerous countries have told me they're on their way. We're going to have an international coalition to free up the Straits of Hormuz.

[A]

That ended up, I guess, being what I said yesterday, it was the salesman presumptive close, which sometimes works. It doesn't work on me. I hate the presumptive clothes. But he was hoping that these countries think, well, he's already said we were, so I guess we better.

[C]

You know, I'm not made for these times, Jack, because this discussion, it's a great one, an interesting one, but it deserves full sentences, paragraphs of discussion, and not shouting slogans back and forth. I mean, for instance, I'll say this. If we were doing a talk show in Germany, first of all, we'd be speaking German. Secondly, we'd be saying, so you hit us with, like, these insane tariffs, jerk us back and forth, insult us, and then start a war without even informing us. And now you're a little bogged down, the Strait of Hormuz, and if we don't come running, we're the bad guys. What's the matter with this guy? Okay. We would be saying that, on the other hand, it's mighty convenient, because now Europe has an excuse to do what they always do, which is very, very little, in protecting their own economic and security interests. The Straits of Hormuz are incredibly important for everyone.

[A]

More for them than for us.

[C]

Correct.

[A]

We don't need anybody's help to have enough oil. We could produce all the oil we need in our own country if we wanted to. They can't at all. Yeah. It is, once again, a very convenient situation where they can feel like, because the United States is, as Trump said, the most powerful military in the world, we will get that straight back open one way or the other, and they will benefit from it without having to do anything, which is the way it often works for your European countries.

[C]

If I was a German politician, and keep in mind, their leaders are politicians. Right. So I'm a German politician. I'm thinking, all right, what are a couple of different scenarios? One, we go in there and we help them out and we get a handful of our guys killed. And, you know, we're only kind of sort of helping because the US has such an enormous and mighty military, including the Navy. Or we sit back, we scrabble a little bit, we offer, you know, moral support or something like that. The strait gets opened up again, the gas prices drop again, we're fine. That looks pretty attractive to me as a cowardly German politician, for instance.

[A]

I wish I knew how much this stuff actually mattered to the politicians and to the public. Did. Did it land with the public when Trump made various comments about our NATO allies, Didn't help us at all in Afghanistan and Iraq when they lost, you know, significant numbers of soldiers.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And helping us in those wars.

[C]

Yeah. And what's the deal with the British aircraft carriers now? He's like, no, we don't want them now, but we've got the whole stretch of Hormuz thing still going on. I don't know. Firepower looks helpful from where I sit.

[A]

Maybe we ought to talk to Mike Lyons or somebody. It sounds like a sort of childish reaction I might have if I was really angry and wish I hadn't said it.

[C]

Yeah. Butthurt.

[A]

Because it doesn't actually make sense.

[C]

Yeah. That's what it looks like to me. I don't know.

[A]

Dang. I don't know.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

That is something, though. This is a moment. Germany's a big deal. They're the most. They're the richest, most powerful country in the EU by quite a bit. And them saying, no, this is your war. We're not helping with this at all.

[C]

Okay. When Iran has been an evil presence on the planet now going on a half century, disrupting trade, constantly threatening to close the Straits of Hormuz, exporting terrorism and oppressing its own slaughtering its own people in the streets. If they were rats, people would say, isn't there a. Can't you be better in your treatment of rats? I mean, unspeakable evil. And to get rid of them or reduce them to a tenth of their power is beyond question. A great and good thing to do. There's not even a debate debate. How it's being implemented is a little rocky at times, but let's not lose sight of that. That the, the main principle here, which of course our lefty media is pretending isn't true and they're actually getting beat up pretty good for it now. At least some of them are. And I'm glad to see that because the coverage has been ridiculous.

[A]

From Wall Street Journal. Trump is pressuring allies to help reopen the Strait of Hormove. And as we just been talking about so far, most of them aren't biting. Germany has rejected taking part, while Japan and Australia have indicated they're unlikely to send vessels to help. Britain and France said they are assessing possible action but haven't committed to doing anything before fighting halts. All are close allies. Yeah. This is not our war. We did not started as you just heard. Let me, let me scroll up for some good news. We need some good news. This is from the Washington Post, kind

[C]

of on the war.

[A]

Overall, Iran's remaining decision makers are confused, paranoid and having difficulty communicating with one another. I'll bet, said one Western security source, speaking on the condition of anonymity to discuss intelligent assessments. I can't even imagine how they're functioning in Iran.

[C]

I think paranoid's the wrong word because their fears are 100% valid. So fearful, I think, is a better word.

[A]

Yeah. You're not paranoid when you got the world's mightiest military blasting the hell out of you every single day, dropping bombs on your head.

[C]

Yeah, the head guy in Iran. What everybody thinks. Not Weird Beer Junior, but the other head guy in Iran whose name I have around here somewhere, just got snuffed overnight, or so it would seem. The top Iranian security official, Ali Larijani.

[A]

As I've said several times, I think the conversation of we have no idea. They still haven't explained why we're doing this. Yes, they have. I think it's obvious why we're doing it. I don't understand that narrative. On the other hand, the question of how is this going to end? How is this going to end? What is going. What is the ending going to be?

[C]

There are a handful of different possibilities.

[A]

What do you think is the most likely scenario of how this ends.

[C]

Oh, goodness.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

With the remnants of the regime so weakened, they cut a deal that is

[A]

acceptable Venezuela style and then they open. But they let the straight of Hormuz open back up again and we declared victory and get out.

[C]

Well, some of that. I think we maintain a significant presence in the area so that if they renege on the deal, we hammer them.

[A]

And the agreement is we're going to

[C]

stop killing the hell out of you. For now, you better behave. We're watching.

[A]

And that doesn't mean Israel would stop.

[C]

No, not necessarily.

[A]

They might think, hey, we got free reign to drop any bomb anywhere, anywhere we want in Iran. They can't stop us, so let's just keep going.

[C]

Although for what purpose? I mean, if they've got the regime so reduced that it hardly exists anymore,

[A]

I don't know that's where. Because I got in a no military background. I don't know anything about this. We've hit 10,000 targets or something like that. Are there endless targets? Do you run out of things to hit? I don't know.

[C]

A lot of it's hidden.

[A]

Right. So I also keep hearing about how AI is factoring into a lot of what we're doing. I wish I knew more about that. Is that like significant AI or is it just. I mean, because really, I mean, if I use a calculator to come up with a number that's kind of using AI. So is it significant AI or is it just kind of basic AI? I don't really know.

[C]

Right, right. Like crazy advanced or is it, hey, chat GPT. What are the 30th 50th sized cities in Iran now? We'll bomb those, right? No, I don't know.

[A]

But as you're talking about a divided, a house divided against itself must fall. The media coverage presenting this war as if it's clearly a disaster has been from the get go. I wonder where that's going to land with the poll numbers. The last poll numbers we had to end last week, I guess they'd gone up. People's support for the war had gone up since it started, which was a little bit of a surprise to me. I don't know how long that will last. If the, if you got relentless coverage of how this is going badly and it's clearly a disaster, which it's not to my mind, going badly and it's absolutely not clearly a disaster. The straight of Hormuz thing is a problem, but we are only two weeks into this thing. In a couple of days It's a very short period of time for a

[C]

war to accomplish something of great historical importance. Yes. Final note, fans of irony. The senior Iranian leader I just mentioned, Ali Lara Johnny, the security chief who played a big factor in machine gunning tens of thousands of his countrymen who hate him and are trying to escape their godforsaken country. He had warned President Trump last week to, quote, watch out for yourself lest you be eliminated.

[A]

He's the guy who said that. Yeah.

[C]

He got a bomb dropped on his head overnight. So goodbye

[A]

now. He's in his beard, is in heaven along with the rest of him or wherever he goes.

[C]

Well, I doubt it's heaven.

[A]

How about that story about the soccer team? Those players are going back because their, their families have been abducted. Well, in a couple instances, their families have disappeared and Iran got word to him. So the soccer players have decided to, having accepted asylum there, go back. Yeah, to try to save their families. And the report I was reading last night from an Iranian journalist said these people, these women are going to be tortured and murdered. That is what's going to happen to them when they get back. That's a terrible story.

[C]

They've been offered amnesty for their sins. But there are so many examples in Iranian history where that offer is made and you end up at the end of a crane.

[A]

That's a tough call, man. That has to be a tough one because your family might be thinking, no, stay there. This place sucks. It's always sucked. It's going to suck when you get back. You stay there and live your life. And I mean, that's a tough one. As a parent, I don't know, I. And why it doesn't get more sympathy with, like, the college campuses, the, you know, the Hollywood Oscar crowd or whatever. It seems like such a sympathetic story.

[C]

That's how twisted they are over Trump.

[A]

Yeah, man, that's a bad one. I'll bet, I'll bet we're gonna hear. But we're gonna hear about that when they get back or they'll just disappear and never be heard from again. We've got a mailbag on the way. Stay tuned.

[C]

Armstrong and Getty.

[A]

The music on our broadcast, it's all Irish bands. Because of St. Patrick's Day, we are honoring everything that St. Patrick did for our country in the founding signer of

[C]

the Declaration of Independence. Exactly.

[A]

And won the battle of Bunker Hill.

[C]

Patrick. I'm sorry. Freedom loving. Quote of the day. Continuing our series on war, a couple of contrasting thoughts here. First of all, John Randolph, the surest way to prevent War is not to fear it. Very similar to George Washington saying, the best way to prevent war is to prepare for it. Then you got Percy Bishelli, the. The great poet. Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform. He only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder. And I have a collection of those various poets and thinkers of beautiful thoughts about how war is unjust and terrible. And it is absolutely terrible. The problem is, Percy, what if the guy next door decides to come and kill you? What are you gonna do? Write him some nice poetry? No, you gotta kill him back. That's why I value our poets and dreamers. But they can't be in charge. Mailbag,

[A]

drop us a note.

[C]

Mailbagarmstrongetty.com JT and Livermore. I seriously don't get what's going on here. He says, I rejected David Ignatius premise that Iran has survived America's hardest punch. How can an educated man say Iran has survived anything, let alone our hardest punch? First off, I don't know how to define exactly what the hardest punch would be, but I know enough that it would include completely wiping out Iran's single most important economic engine, oil. Trump hasn't touched the oil producing segments of the economy, but he can easily wipe out Carg Island's oil processing capability, along with every tanker, port, pipelines, and even the fields themselves. He hasn't done that. But even that wouldn't be America's hardest punch because it leaves out all the other infrastructure elements, communications, power, water, roads, bridges that could be damaged, but it'll have been largely left alone. A real reporter would have pointed this out from the beginning. A real report would have included the fact that the leadership in Iran seems oblivious to the fact that Trump hasn't even started playing hardball yet, let alone has he delivered his hardest punch. God, you can't hate the media enough.

[A]

I think it's the hardest punch that we're going to be willing to throw because we don't want to destroy the. In theory, we'd like the people to rise up and take over the country and still have, you know, oil to produce and bridges and all kinds of infrastructure. We destroy all that, then we might be in a you broke it, you own it situation. I don't know if we can destroy their infrastructure and then say buy.

[C]

Yeah, well, we could, but it certainly wouldn't earn us many friends. And the point is not to have enemies in that part of the world, which actually is going in a great direction. We're down to a minute. Good Lord. All right, we'll stick with this topic. Ron from Chicago, Guys, you brought this up on the show today, why Trump's doing what he's doing. Read the art of the deal. This has been his modus operandi for 50 years. I was actually going to say when we were talking about the Allies cooperation, or lack thereof, that he's probably expecting Germany to say, all right, you need our help. We need you to knock down the tariffs and buy more Mercedes Benzes. And Trump would go, okay, that's fine. He's not about friends. He's about transactions. And so, yeah, maybe you're right, Ron.

[A]

Ian Bremmer made the point last night that the Supreme Court taking away Trump's tariff power hurt him a lot, because you know, that that's what he would have done with, for instance, Germany and Great Britain yesterday when they were talking about how they won't help us with the war. He would, he would have slapped him with tariffs over that. You know, he would have. But he doesn't have that power anymore. We got a lot more to go. If you missed a second week at the podcast, Armstrong and Yeti on Demand.

[C]

Armstrong and Gettysburg.