The A&G Replay Friday Hour Three

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: The A&G Replay Friday Hour Three
Date: September 19, 2025
Hosts: Jack Armstrong & Joe Getty

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Episode Overview

This Armstrong & Getty replay hour offers a classic mix of personal anecdotes, cultural critique, and commentary on current social issues. The hosts pivot from wild human-interest stories (like an unexpected birth at Burning Man) to deeper questions about masculinity, social isolation, shifting values among young Americans, and the stifling intellectual climate on today's college campuses. The tone shifts from humor and mockery to serious societal analysis, with notable outrage at the disconnect between public posturing and private opinion in academic and personal life. The hour concludes with advice on spotting contempt in relationships — a seemingly light moment underscored by genuine insight.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

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1. Burning Man Baby: A Wild Anecdote

[04:04] – [04:48]

• The segment kicks off with a story of a woman unexpectedly giving birth at Burning Man, not knowing she was pregnant.
• Hosts marvel at the oddity and shock of not knowing about a pregnancy, especially in such a wild environment.
• Quote:
  • Jack Armstrong: "That's a good story right there… 'Thank God there happened to be a doctor there. I didn't even know I was pregnant while I was partying at Burning Man.'" [04:26]
• Sets a humorous, incredulous tone to start the hour.

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2. Male Anger, Masculinity, and Social Malaise

[04:56] – [07:35]

• Discusses a USA Today cover story on rising male anger online and the crisis of masculinity.
• Stats: Men in the U.S. face "unprecedented levels of loneliness, fatigue, depression, and suicide."
• The rise of hyper-masculine influencers (cigar-smoking, jet-setting types blaming women for men’s woes) is noted, but Armstrong admits he doesn't know how widespread their impact is.
• Getty asserts that most men are unfairly demonized just for being masculine, often from early schooling.
• Quote:
  • Joe Getty: "The number of men who are demonized merely for being men and told that their masculinity is by definition in itself toxic…it's an elephant and an ant." [06:49]

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3. Airplane Confrontation: Civility (or Lack Thereof) in Public Spaces

[07:35] – [13:57]

• Jack describes a tense airplane incident where a man refuses to switch seats to accommodate a family, reacting with inexplicable rage.
• A British passenger comments from behind: "You're the reason that society is breaking down. People like you and acting like this, that is a problem with society." [10:53]
• The altercation almost escalates, with several passengers expressing readiness to intervene physically.
• Armstrong notes the strange prevalence of such stories and suspects “a whole bunch of people were looking forward to the opportunity to take care of Waffle House Airlines.” [13:31]
• The episode underscores fraying social norms and readiness for conflict.

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4. Young Voters and Diverging Values

[18:45] – [24:52]

• Getty shares NBC poll data on what young voters of differing ideologies see as key to life success.
• Among young Trump-voting men, "having children" tops the list (34%); for Harris-voting women, "fulfilling job and career" leads (51%), with "having children" near the bottom (6%).
• Emotional stability is a far greater concern for women; for young men, it’s irrelevant.
• Jack: “It explains why we've got the lowest birth rate we've ever had… we're going to continue down that road.” [22:57]
• Both hosts note the widening gender divide in priorities and the potential demographic consequences for society.
• Quote:
  • Joe Getty: “Our college students are so much more conservative and sane than you think they are. Partly because who gets amplified and applauded and publicized? The radical lefty lunatic front, the normie kids just… they're afraid so they're quiet.” [34:17]

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5. Preference Falsification and The College Experience

[27:44] – [41:29]

• Discussion centers on "preference falsification": when people pretend to agree with prevailing opinions because dissent feels dangerous.
• Getty summarizes research showing 88% of college students feign more progressive views than they hold for social/academic success.
• Cites survey/statistics:
  • 87% of students actually identify as exclusively heterosexual and support a binary model of gender, but most would never say so publicly.
  • 77% disagree with letting gender identity override biological sex in official contexts, but remain silent.
  • Over 80% have misrepresented their views in assignments.
  • 73% don’t trust even their close friends with their true beliefs.
• The result is a generation “managing” rather than maturing, hiding true selves for self-preservation.
• Quote:
  • Joe Getty: “Authenticity, once considered a good thing for all of us psychologically, has become a social liability.” [36:50]
• Getty is emotionally charged, calling the academic culture "mental and intellectual torture" that must be stopped.

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6. Spotting Contempt in Relationships: The Marriage Smirk

[44:32] – [48:47]

• Jack discusses a relationship psychologist’s claim that contempt (especially as a facial expression — the "one-sided mouth raise") is the biggest predictor of divorce.
• Four horsemen of relationship doom: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling — but contempt is the hardest to overcome.
• Contempt lingers, unlike fear, anger, or even happiness.
• Quote:
  • Joe Getty: “The feeling that a person or a thing is beneath consideration, worthless, or deserving scorn. There's no coming back from that.” [47:02]
• Jack adds that "disgust and contempt are to a relationship what gasoline and matches are to a fire."
• Recognizing these signs early may help couples address problems before they fester irreparably.

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• [04:26] Jack Armstrong: "That’s a good story… Thank God there happened to be a doctor there. I didn't even know I was pregnant while I was partying at Burning Man."
• [06:49] Joe Getty: "The number of men who are demonized merely for being men… it's an elephant and an ant."
• [10:53] British Passenger: "You're the reason society is breaking down. People like you, and acting like this—that is a problem with society."
• [22:57] Jack Armstrong: "It explains why we’ve got the lowest birth rate we’ve ever had. And it would lead me to believe that we’re going to continue down that road."
• [34:17] Joe Getty: "Our college students are so much more conservative and sane than you think they are... the normie kids just… they're afraid so they're quiet."
• [36:50] Joe Getty: "Authenticity, once considered a good thing for all of us psychologically, has become a social liability."
• [47:02] Joe Getty: "The feeling that a person or a thing is beneath consideration, worthless, or deserving scorn. There’s no coming back from that."

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Segment Timestamps

• [04:04 – 04:48] — Burning Man birth story
• [04:56 – 07:35] — Male anger, the crisis of masculinity and online influencers
• [07:35 – 13:57] — Airplane conflict, escalation, and commentary on social breakdown
• [18:45 – 24:52] — Youth voter priorities, gender divide in values, poll results
• [27:44 – 41:29] — Preference falsification, college student conformity vs. authenticity
• [44:32 – 48:47] — Contempt in marriage—psychological insights and relationship advice

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Tone & Style

• The Armstrong & Getty blend: irreverent, skeptical, sometimes exasperated but deeply engaged with cultural and social changes.
• Humor and incredulity are counterbalanced by earnest concern, particularly in longer rants about social trends or academic conformism.
• Frequent rapid-fire banter and analogies (“Waffle House Airlines,” “elephant and an ant”) punctuate the serious content.

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Summary Takeaway

This episode of Armstrong & Getty is an engaging, occasionally exasperated meditation on the widening divides in culture and values. The show weaves together stories of everyday madness (the airplane incident, Burning Man birth), big-picture demographic trends, and sharp critiques of both social influence and academic groupthink. Amidst the jokes are serious concerns about honesty, conformity, and the psychological costs of living in a polarized, performative era — whether that’s on a university campus or in a marriage on the brink.

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End of summary.

Transcript

[Jack Armstrong]

This is an iHeart podcast.

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[Joe Getty]

Free.

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[Asma Khalid]

America is changing and so is the world.

[Tristan Redman]

But what's happening in America isn't just the cause of global upheaval. It's also a symptom of disruption that's happening everywhere.

[Asma Khalid]

I'm Asma Khalid in Washington, D.C. i'm.

[Tristan Redman]

Tristan Redman in London, and this is the Global story.

[Asma Khalid]

Every weekday, we'll bring you a story from this intersection where the world and America meet.

[Tristan Redman]

Listen on BBC.com or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Jack Armstrong]

Broadcasting live from the Abraham Lincoln radio studio at the George Washington Broadcast Center.

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Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty.

[Jack Armstrong]

Armstrong and Getty.

[Joe Getty]

And now here's Armstrong and Getty.

[Jack Armstrong]

Not live from Studio C where Armstrong and Getty. We've taken the day off. We're just exhausted.

[Joe Getty]

Yes. But you can enjoy this incredibly carefully prepared Armstrong and Getty replay. Hours, minutes of effort went into distilling the show to its full fight. This. It's very.

[Jack Armstrong]

So it's okay.

[Joe Getty]

So sit back and enjoy an Armstrong and Getty replay.

[Jack Armstrong]

My brother and his wife Kayla, this.

[Joe Getty]

Was their first time to Burning Man. Kayla woke up, wasn't feeling great.

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My brother Casey ran out and said, I need help.

[Joe Getty]

Within minutes, they had like an OBGYN.

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In there in his underwear helping. There were no signs of pregnancy. We were at the lake the weekend before.

[Joe Getty]

She was in a swimming suit. She did not look pregnant.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, that's a woman talking about how her niece, I guess because that's the aunt, had a baby at Burning man and didn't know she was pregnant. So that's a good story for the kid when the kid grows up. Yeah, I had you at Burning Man. Thank God there happened to be a doctor there. I didn't even know I was pregnant while I was partying at Burning Man. That's a good story right there. That's.

[Joe Getty]

Wow. That's for 99.9 of women on Earth. That story is just a head scratch.

[Jack Armstrong]

No kidding.

[Joe Getty]

You didn't know.

[Jack Armstrong]

From women to men. This is going to lead me into my nearly getting in a fight on a plane story. Front page, USA Today cover story. Male anger finds a new home online. Here's the thing to be afraid of.

[Joe Getty]

All right.

[Jack Armstrong]

And it's about how the online focus on masculinity comes at a time when study after study shows men in America are experiencing unprecedented levels of loneliness, fatigue, depression, and suicide. That is all true and probably should be discussed more. Wonder if that has anything to do with the 55 shootings in Chicago over the weekend. Eight deaths so far. They're still counting because I haven't got all the numbers in yet.

[Joe Getty]

I don't know, you know how it is at the end of the summer. You're just yelling at us yourself earlier on how it's time to get down to business and do you get serious in the rest of it and, you know, you get to the end of the summer, you realize, cut. There's like five, six people I meant to shoot this summer and I haven't yet. I've got to get this done.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, you say to yourself, gonna be snowing soon. You say to yourself, where did summer go? So many rifles I haven't shot. And here it is.

[Joe Getty]

So many minor conflicts I meant to settle with deadly force. I better get to it.

[Jack Armstrong]

Anyway, back to the USA Today and all those awful statistics about men coming to their apparent rescue are groomed muscular men in polished videos smoking cigars, sitting in a private jet, doing push ups and whispering that men's pain is because of women. Women are greedy, untrustworthy, weak and inferior, these influencers say. And then they get into how this is affecting young men. I don't, I don't have any idea. I know that exists. I don't have any idea how big an influence that is on the men of the world. I really don't know. I personally don't know any that are into that.

[Joe Getty]

But, oh, I have a great, great story about the whole online influencer thing that I want to get to later. But yeah, I mean, that sort of thing does exist. And some of these guys have followings. Absolutely true. But the number of men who are demonized merely for being men and told that their masculinity is by definition in itself toxic. It doesn't have to be toxic. Just to be masculine is ugly. And they're given that message as little boys at school that they need to sit down and shut up and act like the little girls. Blah, blah, blah. The number of guys who have to deal with that crap, as opposed to the vanishingly small number that want to go all Tate Brothers on womankind. Just please, please. It's an. It's an elephant and an ant.

[Jack Armstrong]

So that's an odd lead in to this. I don't know if it has anything to do with it, but there was an angry man on a plane I got on yesterday. So flying domestically over the weekend. One charming thing that I learned with a couple of different airports was nobody has any idea what the new rules are for what you put on what you take off, what you take out of your bag, what you can leave in your bag. Nobody has any idea, apparently, including the TSA agents, because it just, it varies from person to person. Even had one TSA agent say to me, you can leave that on. Then the next TSA agency said, you got. Agent said, you got to take that off. And the guy behind me rolled his eyes. Okay, there he goes again, like, so.

[Joe Getty]

If y' all can't get together on this, what do you want out of us?

[Jack Armstrong]

Anyway, so I get on this plane and. And I'm walking down the aisle, headed back to my proletariat seats. I don't sit up in the first class section. I'm back with the rest of us, and I'm walking back to my seat, and there is a mom who I had seen in the waiting line in the airport. She's got, like, a one and a half year old, and she's, you know, doing the bouncing up and down, trying to keep the one and a half year old calm and all that sort of stuff. And she's sitting there, and then there's this guy, and I see the whole thing. I end up seeing the whole thing because I'm just standing right there waiting to get back. She says, my husband's not booked to be sitting with us. Would you mind trading seats with him? And he said, plan better. And she said, I'm sorry, what? He said, plan better, and she said, you don't need to be so plan better. Oh, all I did was that plan better. What is wrong with you, sir? I'm just. Plan better. I mean, he's screaming, and he is right next to my elbow. I mean, his head is right next to my elbow because I'm standing in the aisle and he's about, like, mid, late 30s, skinny guy, shaved head, dressed like he's, you know, not a crazy person, but with the look of a crazy. His expression of a crazy person. Anyway, I. Everybody was, like, immediately on edge because this guy was clearly unhinged. And, and I thought, if he touches that woman holding that baby, I am going to choke this guy out. I mean, because I was right there. I mean, I put. I put my bag in my other arm. I'm. I. It would have taken nothing to do this. But then, then her husband, who's two rows further up, same exact seat. So it would have changed this guy's life. Not at all. He doesn't have to change seats. He could have said, no, thank you. Or, or he could have done what I would have Done. And said, sure, it's exactly the same. Seat two.

[Joe Getty]

War was forward.

[Jack Armstrong]

What do I care? But the husband said, hey, you don't need to. You don't need to talk to my wife like that. Plan better. I've flown with my kid before. I plan better. Wow.

[Joe Getty]

Wow. This guy's some sort of a motivational speaker, evidently. With a very narrow focus to his presentation. It can be summed up in two words.

[Jack Armstrong]

And so he was so over the top so quick. I think everybody was stunned. Like, what do you even. Where do you even go with this conversation? My favorite part of the whole thing was, though, coming from behind me is a British accent. You're the reason that society is breaking down people like you and acting like this. That is a problem with society.

[Joe Getty]

Like what he said.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yes. And it sounded like we had a narrator. It was like David Attenborough from the wilderness shows. Here we see the young man in his natural habitat angry at a woman who has a kid or whatever.

[Joe Getty]

Right, Exactly. That is so funny that it was a Brit, because while I was in England. Then you can get on with the story. While I was in England, I thought I was meant to be British. I'm more comfortable here.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, wow.

[Joe Getty]

Everybody's a bit more restrained.

[Jack Armstrong]

I want to hear about it.

[Joe Getty]

And considerate. Everything.

[Jack Armstrong]

I want to hear about that. So the only thing left of the story is so the guy. It makes it pretty clear that he is not going to do anything physically. And the line's moving, so I got to move. So I get back to my seat, I sit down, and. And I say to the two seatmates I've got, including this one guy who turns out to be wound so flipping tight. I mean, this guy, he was chomping his gun the whole time, tapping his fingers on his keyboard. I don't know if he, like, did cocaine before he got on the plane or if that's just the way he rolls all the time. Big, tall, strong young dude. And I'm telling him the story, and he says, oh, where is he? Where is he? Oh, man, he's. I don't care if I get on cnn. I'm ready to take this guy out. I thought this was fantastic. There's people on this plane ready to fight right now. Wow.

[Joe Getty]

So you've got the Brit who's kind of functioning as a. As a very restrained, dignified, intelligent commentator on the the good and the bad that is laid arrayed before us. There's a mother and a young man.

[Jack Armstrong]

A mother and a baby she needs to protect from the wild man. Let's see how it goes.

[Joe Getty]

Well, and then the young man's like, you know, you make a good point, Granddad. Let's whoop some ass. Which, you know, also standing up for decency.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know what happened. It looked like a whole bunch of people moved their row. Like all of them, like two entire rows moved to accommodate the mom, kid, and husband. Because it didn't make any difference. They're. They're in that section where all the.

[Joe Getty]

Seats are the same.

[Jack Armstrong]

And, and then, and I hope they.

[Joe Getty]

All stared at Baldy McRage the rest of the flight.

[Jack Armstrong]

The guy next to me, though, he just, he spent all his time looking down the aisle like, come on, do something, guy. Do something. I don't know. I don't know why he had so much energy needed to work out. Wow.

[Joe Getty]

Who, who he got on the plane angry at.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's funny how I. We hear these stories, we talk about them all the time, where somebody's acting out on a plane and I think, how is there not some young guy to take care of this on my plane for whatever reason?

[Joe Getty]

Just luck of the draw.

[Jack Armstrong]

There seem to be a whole bunch of people that were looking forward to the opportunity to take care of Waffle House Airlines. Exactly, exactly. Waffle House has an airline now. Yeah. We fly at 2 in the morning. Soon as the Waffle House closes, everybody goes straight from the Waffle House, the bar to the Waffle House onto the plane. That's the way the Waffle House Airlines works. And there's a lot of fighting. Waffle House air. Oh.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, no, no. Oh, boy.

[Jack Armstrong]

Anywho, you know, I gotta remember that line, though.

[Joe Getty]

My wife says, you know, I really should have brought some heels.

[Jack Armstrong]

Plaid better. Yeah, just. And immediately go to 11. Exactly.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Shriek that at people more often.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know how many of you, if you were looking at the NFL weekend, had put your money on Travis Kelsey socks. Oh, but that might have been a good direction to go with your prize picks. Next time, maybe you can edge toward. I mean, I don't know if there's a line on, does Travis Kelce suck or not? Because the answer is yes.

[Joe Getty]

Can suckage be measured objectively?

[Jack Armstrong]

I think so. Anyway, you need to download the Price Picks app.

[Joe Getty]

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And Getty Show.

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[Asma Khalid]

America is changing, and so is the world.

[Tristan Redman]

But what's happening in America isn't just the cause of global upheaval. It's also a symptom of disruption that's happening everywhere.

[Asma Khalid]

I'm Asma Khalid in Washington, D.C. i'm.

[Tristan Redman]

Tristan Redman in London, and this is the Global Story.

[Asma Khalid]

Every weekday, we'll bring you a story from this intersection where the world and America meet.

[Tristan Redman]

Listen on BBC.com or, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Joe Getty]

So this is so interesting and crazy. Steve Kacki at NBC Polling put this out. They asked young voters, Gen Z adults, if you want to use that term, 18 to 29 years old, what they considered important to a successful life. What is important to your personal definition of success? And they gave them a bunch of things to choose. They could choose no more than one. The numbers will make that obvious. But the number one thing that's important, your personal definition of success. Among men who voted for Trump, young men who voted for Trump, number one thing was having children. Oh, 34%.

[Jack Armstrong]

Interesting.

[Joe Getty]

Barely beating out financial independence at 33%, a fulfilling job and career at 30% and being married at 29%. I. Family. Success. Fulfillment. Family.

[Jack Armstrong]

I was for answers. I was joking, yelling money. I would not put that on my list of things that make you a success.

[Joe Getty]

So women who voted for Kamala Harris, their top four, at 51%, fulfilling job and career. Number two, having money to do the things you want. Number three, having emotional stability, whatever that means. 39%.

[Jack Armstrong]

What?

[Joe Getty]

And number four, using talents and resources to help others, which is a lovely idea.

[Jack Armstrong]

Emotional stability.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. So fulfilling job and career was 51%. Having money to do things you want is 46% having emotional stability, whatever that is. 39% listed that in their several choices. Now, being married, Almost the bottom 6%, having children. Tied at the bottom 6% listed. That is important to a personal definition of a successful life. In contrast to the men who voted for Trump, having children, being married was 34 and 29%.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, that's a problem. Obviously you ain't going to end up with many kids in your country, which we don't have. Lowest birth rate we've ever had in the United States of America. I think he just explained it.

[Joe Getty]

It's not the whole having emotional stability thing. Men who voted for Trump, that was in last place, eight, you know, 91% of them said, the hell are you talking about?

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, probably with a heap and helping of what? I don't even know what you mean. So I'm going to put this last.

[Joe Getty]

What?

[Jack Armstrong]

Isn't that. What, what's weird about that is isn't that something you just kind of inherently want every day of your life, starting at birth? I mean, it's just. It's like saying, I'd like to have enough air throughout the day and enough calories to keep me alive. I mean.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, well, given the fact that not having emotional stability means you're emotionally unstable, yeah, that's. You don't want that. But the fact that really 40% of women listed that in their top. I mean, it was the third place priority for life.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow.

[Joe Getty]

That speaks to the emotional instability of, of women in the modern world.

[Jack Armstrong]

No. What year did Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus come out nine early 90s. It's God now it's men are from Mars and women are from, I don't know, some alternate universe that we've never looked into. I mean, just how far apart they are. I'm not claiming, I am claiming this. I guess that I think one is better than the other, and I agree with one much more than the other.

[Joe Getty]

But there's certainly examples of unhinged young men, too.

[Jack Armstrong]

But, but even without putting a judgment on it, the, the two sides are very, very far apart.

[Joe Getty]

How many times has it come up in recent years that the engine, the bulk of the people screaming like lunatics at these progressive protests are young women? I mean, they're just so angry and hostile and, and misguided and militant and there, there it is right there.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know. I don't know what to make of that. But like I said, it, it explains why we've got the lowest birth rate we've ever had. And it would lead me to believe that we're going to continue down that road.

[Joe Getty]

I'm looking at some of the other answers.

[Jack Armstrong]

It seems to me and this anecdotally. God, it's way more women than men. Anecdotally. It seems to me anecdotally that most young women want to have enough money to travel. That is your goal in life. I want to travel the world and period. Pretty much period.

[Joe Getty]

Drink aperol spritzes at a good Instagram location. Having children listed by almost six times as many men as women or six times the percentage.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's a, that's a. It's a problem.

[Joe Getty]

That's crazy. It's a problem that ever existed in the history of mankind.

[Jack Armstrong]

That is the question I ask that all the time. Has this ever happened before? I wonder.

[Joe Getty]

You know, it's, it's, it's probably worth as a caveat mentioning again, it was 18 to 29 year olds and it's absolutely the case that many men and women don't really feel think they would have kids until they get to a certain point in their lives. Which is fine and appropriate. But given the enormous gulf between men and women on that question, that's surprising.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, before I make any doom and gloom judgments, I suppose I'd like to hear those same questions put to 30 to 39 year olds.

[Joe Getty]

Well, we're surrounded by doom and drowning in gloom, so I don't think you need to make that leap. Here we are, we're not having families, we're not having kids. Hell, they're not even having sex. Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty the Armstrong.

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And Getty Show.

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[Jacob Goldstein]

Over 300 channels, zero bills. That's TiVo plus curated movies, new series and sports highlights. No credit card, no logins, just TV that gets straight to the good stuff. Grab the remote, press play and start watching TiVo plus free binge worthy always on. Check us [e-mail] this is Jacob Goldstein.

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[Asma Khalid]

America is changing and so is the world.

[Tristan Redman]

But what's happening in America is isn't just a cause of global upheaval. It's also a symptom of disruption that's happening everywhere.

[Asma Khalid]

I'm Asma Khalid in Washington, D.C. i'm.

[Tristan Redman]

Tristan Redman in London, and this is the Global Story.

[Asma Khalid]

Every weekday we'll bring you a story from this intersection where the world and America meet.

[Tristan Redman]

Listen on BBC.com or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Joe Getty]

According to a new study, 12% of Americans find Sydney Sweeney's American Eagle ad offensive. The other 88% are able to fit in jeans. Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow.

[Joe Getty]

Gutfeld, the mean boy in high school. So speaking of attitudes, we're supposed to hold you remember when we were supposed to take seriously for about 90 seconds the idea that. Oh, no good. Jeans, jeans, blue jeans. Jeans with blue eyes. White supremacy, eugenics. These people, oh my God. Gosh, they're so nuts. And here's the key. So few people actually agree with them. So we're talking last segment about preference falsification and I'll describe to you exactly what it is. This is a great description from Glenn Reynolds, who's a professor of law at University of Tennessee, one of those Southern universities where people are flocking now because everybody realizes, oh, they like teach you stuff there and don't just indoctrinate you into being a good Marxist like the Ivy League. Anyway, so here's his description of a preference falsification. It's a move usually practiced by authoritarian regimes, but now democracies are catching onto it. The trick is you make citizens pretend that they believe what the government says or what the powers that be say. He's talking about immigration in Britain, and so the government is the correct target. We're talking about education, so it's more the administration, the professors and stuff. But anyway, the trick is they make citizens pretend they believe what the administration says and fake their approval of what it does. You'd promote marches and demonstrations and speech in favor of the preferred positions. And you severely punish marches and demonstrations and speech that oppose those favored positions. You give excuses like stopping, you know, racism or fighting hate speech for shutting down any opposition. You may even have informers that ferret out wrong thinking. Report it to the authorities or to employers or to third parties who will engage in extralegal harassment. If you do it right, you can have upward of 90% of your population hating you and your policies, but doing and saying nothing about them. Because everyone in the 90% thinks they're part of a tiny minority. Resistance will seem futile. This works. Until it doesn't. The problem with preference falsification is that sooner or later, some event or development can make people realize that what they've been told is popular is, in fact, very unpopular. When this happens, as Duke University scholar Tamir Koran writes in his book Private Truths, Public Lies, the result is a preference cascade. When let's when a large swath of the population realizes their dissident views are in fact widely held, they become less afraid of the government or the administration or the professors or the media, and less hesitant about sharing their true sentiments. And then everybody realizes all of a sudden, oh, my gosh, not only have I not been in a tiny minority all the way, all the time I've been in the the strong majority. And by the way, we're right. And my prayer is that this is going to happen at some point in the American educational system. Although, my gosh, they've got the teachers, they got the faculty, they got the administration, and they're bullying the kids. To wit, really interesting piece in the Hill by a couple of guys, the researchers Forrest Rom and Kevin Waldman. On today's college campuses, students are not maturing, they're managing. Beneath the facade of progressive slogans and institutional virtue signaling lies a quiet psychological crisis driven by the demands of ideological Conformity. I first read the write up on this from an opinion writer in the Wall Street Journal. I'm very pleased to see this is in the Hill, which is a very mainstream left leaning because, you know, their readership is people who work in Washington D.C. generally in government or lobbyists and all who depend on government. And that crowd tends to be left leaning. Obviously they like more big government. So the fact that this is being published in the Hill and has gotten a bit of attention is very encouraging. Anyway, so here's the story. Between 2023 and 2025, these guys conducted about 1500 confidential interviews with undergrads, couple of universities, Northwestern and University of Michigan. We were not studying politics, we were studying development. Our question was clinical, not political. Quote what happens to identity formation, which is part of becoming an adult? Who am I? What do I believe? Right? What happens to identity formation when belief is replaced by adherence to orthodoxy? Instead of painstakingly trying to understand the world and coming to a set of beliefs, instead you're just told you need to adhere to this point of view. What happens to identity formation? We asked, have you ever pretended to hold more progressive views than you truly endorse to succeed socially or academically? You want to know what percentage said yes? 88%. 88% said they pretended to hold more progressive views than they truly endorse to succeed socially or academically. These students were not cynical, but adaptive. In a campus environment where grades, leadership and peer belonging often hinge on fluency in performative morality, young adults quickly learn to rehearse what is safe. The result is not conviction or beliefs, but compliance. And beneath that compliance, something vital is lost. Quoting now from the authors, Late adolescence and early adulthood represent a narrow and non replicable developmental window. It's during this stage that individuals begin the lifelong work of integrating personal experiences with inherited values, forming the foundations of moral reasoning, internal coherence and emotional resilience. Oh my gosh. Emotional resilience.

[Jack Armstrong]

Toughness.

[Joe Getty]

When belief is prescriptive, meaning you're told what to believe. An ideological divergence or disagreement is treated as social risk. That integrative process stalls. Rather than forging a durable sense of self. Through trial, error and reflection, students learn to compartmentalize. Publicly, they can form privately, they question, often in isolation. Oh, but remember what we were just talking about. With a preference falsification and preference cascade, they only think they're in isolation. Well, I guess they are in isolation, but so is everybody around them thinking the same things. So insidious. This split between outer presentation and inner conviction not only fragments identity, but arrests its development and the dissonance shows up everywhere. 78% of the students told us they self censor on their beliefs surrounding gender identity. 78% believe all that gender bending madness is madness, but they gotta be quiet. 72% do that on politics in general, 68% on family values. I mean that's a lot smaller number than the 78% that are. They're soft pedaling their views on gender bending madness, but 68% on just general family values are soft pedaling their views. Our college students are so much more conservative insane than you think they are. Partly because who gets amplified and applauded and publicized? The radical lefty lunatic front, the normie kids. Just they, they're afraid so they're quiet and, and they certainly don't make any noise. And if they do, they're, they're punished or ignored anyway. More than 80% said they had submitted classwork that misrepresented their views in order to align with professors. For many this has become second nature. An instinct for academic and professional self preservation. Listen, maybe it was because I was clueless or stubborn or something as a youngster, but when I was in school and I was in a political science, economics, pre law program that had lots and lots and lots of the sort of stuff we're talking about in it, I never once misrepresented my view in order to align with a professor. Maybe I didn't have a view at.

[Jack Armstrong]

That point.

[Joe Getty]

But that's terrible. To test the gap between expression and belief, we use gender discourse, a contentious topic, both highly visible and ideologically loaded. Right. The authors. In public students were echoed. I'm sorry. In public, students echoed expected progressive narratives. In private, however, their views were more complex. 87% identified as exclusively heterosexual. 87%. And supported a binary model of gender. There's men and there's women, period. That's 87%. 9% expressed partial openness to gender fluidity. 7% embraced the idea of gender as a broad spectrum. And most of these belong to activist circles. Practically Nobody believed there's 58 genders and you get to choose what you are. Practically nobody. 7%. How different is this from the perception we've all formed of what college kids actually think because they've been psychologically battered into conformity. I am not a violent man, but I swear to God, I'd like to take a bulldozer to. A lot of our college campuses, metaphorically of course. Perhaps most telling, 77% and these are college kids, said they disagreed with the idea that gender identity should override biological sex in domains such as sports, health care, or public data, but would never voice that disagreement aloud. So of the 87% that say no, there's dudes and there's gals. That's it. 87%. All but 10% of those said, I would never say that out loud. Holy crap, these poor kids are bullied. It's Stockholm syndrome. They're terrified to speak their minds. 38% describe themselves as morally confused, uncertain whether honesty was still ethical if it meant exclusion, whatever that means. Authenticity, once considered a good thing for all of us psychologically, has become a social liability. And this fragmentation does not end at the classroom door. 73% of students reported mistrust in conversations about these values with close friends. They were afraid to even talk to their friends. That's that. That preference, falsification, that's its direct fruit. They're sure their friends, excuse me, disagree with them. Even though 87% agree with them, they're terrified to say anything out loud. This is not simply peer pressure. It is identity regulation at scale. Being institutionalized universities often justify these dynamics in the name of inclusion. But inclusion that demands dishonesty is not ensuring psychological safety. It is sanctioning self abandonment in attempting to engineer moral unity. Higher education is mistaken consensus for growth and compliance for care. And the students know it's wrong when they're given permission to speak freely. Many describe the experience of participating as not only liberating, but clarifying for students trained to perform, the act of telling the truth felt radical. Finally, if higher education is to fulfill its promise as a site of intellectual and moral development, it must relearn the difference between support and supervision. It must recenter truth, not consensus, as its animating value. And it must give back to students what has been taken from them, the right to believe and the space to become. I don't know how exactly you can join this fight. Maybe it's by supporting organizations or, I don't know, podcasts, radio shows that are fighting the fight. But man, we've got to win this for the youngsters. They are being mentally and intellectually tortured and bullied by these monsters, these monsters in their ivory towers. And it's gotta stop. Armstrong and Getty.

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[Jacob Goldstein]

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[Joe Getty]

Free.

[Jacob Goldstein]

No signups, no fees, just press play. That's TiVo plus free, binge worthy and always on. Check us [e-mail] this is Jacob Goldstein.

[Odoo Advertiser]

From what's yous Problem? When you buy business software from lots of vendors, the costs add up and it gets complicated and confusing. Odoo solves this. It's a single company that sells a suite of enterprise apps that handles everything from accounting to inventory to sales. Odoo is all connected on a single platform. In a simple and affordable way, you can save money without missing out on the features you need. Check out Odoo at o d o o.com that's o d o o.com America.

[Asma Khalid]

Is changing, and so is the world.

[Tristan Redman]

But what's happening in America isn't just the cause of global upheaval. It's also a symptom of disruption that's happening everywhere.

[Asma Khalid]

I'm Asma Khalid in Washington, D.C. i'm.

[Tristan Redman]

Tristan Redman in London, and this is the Global story.

[Asma Khalid]

Every weekday we'll bring you a story from this intersection where the world and America meet.

[Tristan Redman]

Listen on BBC.com or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Jack Armstrong]

Said this many times after your years of trying a number of different kinds of therapy for me and my family, kids, marriage, all kinds of different stuff. I think it's mostly worthless. I really do. I really do. I think it's mostly a waste of money, unfortunately. But this is pretty good. From a marriage psychologist who reveals the number one sign of a future separation. And this stuff is almost always crap, especially if it's in the New York Post, which is where I got this. But I thought this was really good. If you want to know if your marriage is heading to splitsville, don't check your partner's phone, check their face. Like any of that, you know, oh, there's so many stupid things out there. You know, the one sign that he's gonna cheat or whatever the hell. I mean, they're just all dumb.

[Joe Getty]

But clickbait.

[Jack Armstrong]

The subtle smirk of superiority is the number one red flag for divorce, according to this psychologist. And they get into why. Research found that four nasty little habits, criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling are the four horsemen of the apocalypse when it comes to dooming relationships. I'll read those four again. Criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling. But contempt is the kiss of death. That's the one. And you've said that for years. That's the one you can't get past. Done the largest marriage experiment ever done. They think of couples that, you know, survive and don't survive. Body language experts brought couples into a lab and if one member of the couple shows a one sided mouth raise, which I had never heard before, as like a physical contempt thing, but I guess we're just programmed when we're feeling that feeling of contempt for something or you know, the old pleaser, get out of here with that BS or whatever feeling. You raise one side of your mouth. It's funny, if one member of the couple shows a one sided mouth raised towards the other, he can tell you if they're going to get divorced because it's contempt. He could predict divorce with an astonishing 94 accuracy.

[Joe Getty]

Fear.

[Jack Armstrong]

Now this is part I thought was really interesting. Fear comes in a burst and then you calm down. Happiness comes and then you go back to normal. Anger comes and then you calm down. But not contempt. If you feel scorn or disdain for someone else and if it's not addressed, it just festers and grows and stays at the same level. Fear, anger, and then obviously happiness, you get back to a normal level. Contempt does not go away.

[Joe Getty]

May I throw in a definition of contempt? The feeling that a person or a thing is beneath consideration, worthless or deserving, scorn. There's no coming back from that.

[Jack Armstrong]

I've not felt contempt, but I have been on the wrong end of contempt, I think. And having read this, I thought, yeah, that's what was insurmountable. I mean, because once you have contempt for someone, you don't agree, you don't think they are worth listening to on anything.

[Joe Getty]

Right. This is how I feel. This is my priority. I don't care.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. Yeah. That's a tough one to get past. So look out for contempt and. And whatever started to bring it on. The point is you start to deal with it right away. Otherwise it does just grow and fester, and then it gets into a situation where it might not. Might not be reversible.

[Joe Getty]

Mm.

[Jack Armstrong]

They also believe that many couples get in and stuck in an endless loop of the same three arguments throughout the relationship. They just don't realize it. And if you can nail down what your three most common arguments are, you and your partner, you can solve a lot of problems. Like, you get into something, you say, okay, here we're in argument number two again. We always argue about this. And you. You can, you know, realize that, you know, you don't see eye to eye in this particular thing and how you've dealt with it in the past. Back to the contempt thing. Disgust and contempt are to a relationship with gasoline, and matches are to a fire. The telltale signs are eye rolling, mouth crimping, and then subtle fidgeting like picking it clothes or cleaning fingers mid conversation as signals of disdain. This person said that they dubbed this move the lint picker, a behavior that he says screams contempt louder than words ever could.

[Joe Getty]

Interesting. You know, it's probably worth presenting the other side of the coin at some point. We don't have time now, but how do you prevent that sort of thing? Nip it in the bud.

[Jack Armstrong]

Having lint on your shirt? No.

[Joe Getty]

Contempt in your mar. No.

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[WashablesOfAs.com Advertiser]

There's nothing like sinking into luxury at WashablesOfAs.com you'll find the Anabe Sofa which combines ultimate comfort and design at an affordable price. And get this, it's the only sofa that's fully machine washable from top to bottom starting at only $699. The stain resistant performance fabric, slipcovers and cloud like frame duvet can go straight into your wash. Perfect for anyone with kids, pets or anyone who loves an easy to clean spotless sofa. With a modular design and changeable slip covers, you can customize your sofa to fit any space and style. Whether you need a single chair, loveseat or a luxuriously large sectional, Annabe has you covered. Visit washablesofas.com to upgrade your home. Right now you can shop up to 60% off store wide with a 30 day money back guarantee. Shop [e-mail] Add a little to your life. Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

[Jacob Goldstein]

Over 300 channels, zero bills that's TiVo plus curated movies, new series and sports highlights. No credit card, no logins, just TV that gets straight to the good stuff. Grab the remote, press play and start watching TiVo plus free binge worthy always on. Check us [e-mail] in the heat of.

[Asma Khalid]

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[Odoo Advertiser]

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[Jack Armstrong]

This is an iHeart podcast.