The A&G Replay Wednesday Hour Four

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand: The A&G Replay Wednesday Hour Four – December 25, 2024

Hosted by Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty, "Armstrong & Getty On Demand" offers insightful and entertaining discussions on a variety of topics. In this episode, titled "The A&G Replay Wednesday Hour Four," the hosts delve deep into the enduring legacy of the Grateful Dead, share personal anecdotes, and dissect a peculiar news story from Brazil.

---

1. The Grateful Dead Phenomenon

Jack Armstrong initiates the conversation by reflecting on a recent Grateful Dead concert he attended, questioning the band's unparalleled ability to sustain a massive and diverse fanbase over decades.

"One of the reasons I went was it's a phenomenon. I haven't been to a concert in I think 15 years... Every age group there."
[02:36]

He marvels at how the Dead have maintained relevance, performing songs that are over half a century old, and speculates on the communal and improvisational aspects that contribute to their unique appeal.

Joe Getty provides his perspective, attributing the band's success to their musical prowess and the positive, judgment-free community they foster.

"They were just a whale of a band. I mean, just a terrific band... there's an attraction to being part of that that draws young people."
[07:38]

2. Concert Experiences and Crowd Dynamics

The hosts discuss their personal experiences at Dead concerts, highlighting the nonstop energy and the crowd's unwavering enthusiasm.

Jack Armstrong recounts his spontaneous decision to attend a Dead show, emphasizing the all-age attendance and the continuous engagement without any periods of the audience sitting down.

"Not a single person in that stadium that I saw sat for 1 second, 3 and a half hours."
[07:18]

Joe Getty adds that the Dead's combination of technical skill and loose, improvisational style makes their music particularly engaging, especially in a live setting.

"It's such an attractive vibe... it's art, it's magic, it's culture. It's a vibe."
[10:45]

3. The Enduring Appeal and Challenges

As the conversation progresses, Jack Armstrong questions how the Grateful Dead continue to attract new fans in their 20s despite not releasing new material.

"How do you grow new fans in their 20s with 55-year-old songs?"
[08:57]

Joe Getty suggests that the timelessness of their music and the strong sense of community play significant roles in maintaining their fanbase.

"The songs hold up pretty well and it's a jam... being part of that energy being so positive."
[08:57]

4. Personal Anecdotes and Humor

The hosts transition into lighter topics, sharing humorous stories about personal experiences, such as Joe Getty falling asleep during Jerry Garcia's last show and Jack Armstrong's struggles with grilling.

"I fell sound asleep halfway through it... I was baking in the sun."
[11:21]
"How do you stand up there for three and a half hours and pay attention to what you're doing? I'm dying out here."
[12:53]

Their banter highlights the camaraderie and playful dynamic between the hosts, making the conversation relatable and engaging.

5. Peculiar News Story: Brazil Bank Incident

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to dissecting a bizarre news story about a woman in Brazil who was arrested for attempting to get her deceased uncle to sign a bank loan document.

Jack Armstrong introduces the story with a mix of curiosity and humor, questioning the woman's actions.

"When I'm dead, you can do whatever you want to me. Don't charge with a crime... but they're never going to tour again, they claim."
[35:30]

Joe Getty and Katie Green explore the intricacies of the case, discussing the forensic aspects and the woman's apparent lack of awareness regarding her uncle's demise.

"Preliminary forensic analysis says he had died at least several hours before trying to sign for the loan."
[42:28]

The trio uses this story to delve into broader themes of perception, intent, and the sometimes blurred lines between reality and facade.

6. Reflections on Aging and Perception

Towards the end of the episode, the conversation shifts to the topic of aging and how individuals perceive changes in themselves and others over time.

Jack Armstrong muses about encountering people who seem to age differently, leading to humorous exchanges about youthful appearances versus actual age.

"If I run into somebody and they've aged a certain amount, it would lead me to believe that I've aged the same amount too."
[32:20]

The discussion underscores the subjective nature of aging and the varying factors that influence one's appearance over the years.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Jack Armstrong on Grateful Dead's timeless appeal:
  "I was just looking around, trying to take it all in, trying to figure out what happened here?"
  [02:50]

• Joe Getty on the band's community vibe:
  "We're all here, we're all friends, Nobody's gonna get ugly."
  [07:38]

• Jack Armstrong on the uniqueness of Dead concerts:
  "Every age group there. And I don't know what they created or why."
  [09:16]

• Joe Getty on enjoying the music:
  "Listen to you, you cynic. You couldn't be a deadhead."
  [13:05]

• Katie Green on the viral news story:
  "I saw the unedited version because now it's been blurred all over the place."
  [39:10]

---

Conclusion

In "The A&G Replay Wednesday Hour Four," Armstrong and Getty provide a captivating exploration of the Grateful Dead's enduring legacy, interspersed with personal stories and a deep dive into an unusual news incident. Their balanced mix of insightful analysis and lighthearted banter ensures that listeners are both entertained and informed, making it a quintessential episode for fans and newcomers alike.

Transcript

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[Jack Armstrong]

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[Jack Armstrong]

I saw an article in the New York Times about the final Dead shows, final shows of their tour. They said there's chances they'll get back together again for a benefit or something. But they're never going to tour again, they claim. I don't think they probably actually are. They've made that claim many times over the years. They're very old. Yeah, Bob Weir's like Joe Biden old. And I noticed him.

[Joe Getty]

Well, he was. He was gigging as an adult during the Summer of Love in 1967.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, that's one of the things I want to bring up with this phenomenon. So speaking of it being a phenomenon, one of the reasons I went was it's a phenomenon. I haven't been to a concert in I think 15 years. So it'd been a long time. So I'd been to a concert and dead and company was coming to the area. It's 60 miles from my house. And I kind of thought about it a couple of times and I looked at prices. They're too high. Anyway, I finally decided, you know what? I'm gonna do it. So I bought a ticket two hours before, three hours before the show started, hopped on my motorcycle, rode into San Francisco to the baseball StubHub. Yeah. And didn't even pay a ton for it. Luckily, I think people started to panic. Some of the people that had put, I'll say one for $8,000 were starting to panic if they had some left. So it didn't get a bad price. Anyway, I was trying to figure out. While I was sitting there in the concert, I was trying to figure out what is the phenomenon of the whole Grateful Dead thing. As you mentioned, they've been doing this for 55 years, 57 years, something like that. With. With only a couple of exceptions, every song they play is 50 plus years old. They haven't created. They haven't created anything new in forever. And the crowd and the place, I don't know if it was sold out, but I didn't see any empty seats up in the stands. The crowd varied. There were lots of 20 somethings, there were lots of 30 somethings, 40 something, 50 something, 60 something, 70 somethings. Every, every age group there. And I don't. I don't know what, what they created or why. I just. I was just looking around, trying to take it all in, trying to figure out what, what happened here? Why. Why has nobody else ever been able to do this? I remember when we were in Charlotte, North Carolina, the Grateful Dead came through in the mid-90s, and I didn't know anything about the Grateful Dead. I've never really been into the Grateful Dead. They came through town and I didn't go to the concert, but I was at a party that night at a house, and a number of people had been to the Dead concert and they. This is pre Internet. So in the Internet era, obviously you can go online and check what the set list is for every concert, and they would be posted as soon as the concert was over. But this is before the Internet. So these guys would run home and some of them took scraps of paper and pens with them. Some of them were just using the knowledge. And they were sitting there at the kitchen table at this party saying, okay, so what did they play first set? Well, they opened with this, open with that, writing it all down. They kept the log of all the concerts they'd seen in the set list in a way that just I don't think happens that often with bands. Part of it is they. They don't play that many songs because each song is 13 to 15 minutes long. So you play like four songs, take a break, play four more songs, and you. Your three hours are up. That's one weird aspect of the whole thing. The other thing is they don't come out and say a word and never have, according to the New York Times. They don't say, hey, Atlanta, good to be here. Here's one from the new out, you know, thanks for coming, or nothing.

[Joe Getty]

They don't say, they wander out and start playing.

[Jack Armstrong]

They wander out, start playing, and when they're done, they walk off and that's it. And. And from the beginning, another interesting thing is they've always encouraged people recording it and posting live recordings and they got gazillions of live action albums and just. Well, you, you tell me what, what is different about that band that allowed them to tour for 50 some years? I was just looking it up. Still one of the top grossing concert tours out there. They didn't play that many shows, but they're making gazillions of dollars.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

In ticket sales and T shirt sales and everything like that. Oh, and one more thing before I let you. You answer the question because you know more about it than I do. So they walk out, they start playing, and it's got a drum beat to it that I don't quite recognize off the top of my head. Because all the songs kind of have a similar drum beat and a similar thing. And everybody's twirling, all the girls are twirling in their thing and then everybody's dancing everything like it. Not a single person in that stadium that I saw sat for 1 second, 3 and a half hours. I've never been to a concert like that. I've been to plenty of concerts where people stand for the big hits, then sit back down for a slow song or whatever. Not a person I was expecting to get to sit for a while. None of that happened. So they do the drum beat, drum beat, and they open with the Buddy Holly song that they do regularly.

[Joe Getty]

Probably not fade away.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, yeah. And so then the drum, the drum stop. And then the whole crowd in unison says, I'm gonna tell you what I'm gonna do. And then everybody sang every word to every song for three and a half hours. Never sat down. I've never seen anything like that. Why is that? You tell me why that is.

[Joe Getty]

I'm sure there are multiple books written to address that very question. And they are book length, as books often are. I would say. I mean, number one at the beginning, they were just a whale of a band. I mean, just a terrific band. That was incredible. Well, you know, there's a couple of sayings among musicians. Ragged but right or loose but tight. They had a combination of being extremely good and extremely loose and improvisational and. And really fun music to listen to if you're stoned. Plus they have a weird like hippie community thing going like, we're all here, we're all friends, Nobody's gonna get ugly. It's gonna be great. Everybody's gonna enjoy themselves. Nobody's gonna judge anybody else. We're gonna listen to the jams and have a great time. You know, there. And there are actually other bands that have it. You just don't hear about it as much. Fish has an enormous following that's very Grateful Dead like, and. And there are a couple others. Dave Matthews Band, surely, but not on.

[Jack Armstrong]

That scale for that long. Without ever putting any new stuff out.

[Joe Getty]

Well, no, no, that's what's.

[Jack Armstrong]

Just like you. And how do you grow new fans in their 20s with 55 year old songs? I mean, it's. I don't know.

[Joe Getty]

Well, part of it's that the songs hold up pretty well and. And it's a jam. Part of it's just there's an attraction to being part of that that draws young people. The whole I'm a hippie thing is. Is hot. Amongst your. Your 20 somethings, at least in some quarters. Oregon, for instance, right?

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, yeah. The people sitting next to me were from Oregon and they were going to all three shows. Everybody around me was going to all three shows. I was the only one that was just going to the one, the one show. And it was a mom and dad roughly my age with their high school kids. They brought all their kids and their kids knew all the words to every song. I don't. I don't know. It's. It's unlike anything I've ever been around. I've been to. I've. I got plenty of acts that I like that do that on a smaller scale. Like there's several hundred people that are that into it, but not that hundreds of thousands for six decades. It's just. Yeah, I don't. I. And then I wonder how much of it was. It like grew on itself, like, you know, becomes a thing and a thing is. That's. Nothing draws across like a crowd, that whole thing.

[Joe Getty]

Right. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's. It's such an attractive, like vibe, an attractive corner of humankind that people who weren't there at the beginning or if, you know, they didn't grow up with the songs or whatever, just the idea that, that many people could get together and have their energy be so positive and a lack of conflict and a lack of people being a holes like people tend to be and listening to the music and dancing and stuff, it's just. It's an attractive proposition. And you know why? You know why? It's. It's on a scale that nobody else has ever matched. I don't know. It's. It's. It's art, it's magic, it's culture. It's a vibe.

[Jack Armstrong]

I thought at some point, surely we're going to sit down during one of these slow songs, aren't we? I mean, it's a Friday night. We've all worked all week long. We're all a little tired. Come on. A lot of you are way older than I am, surely. Nope. Nobody was sitting down at any point, even for a moment.

[Joe Getty]

Well, I am a fan. I am not a Deadhead. I have some good friends who are. Here is my horrifying. Well, I'm sorry. It's my impressive but horrifying Grateful Dead claim to fame. I was at Jerry Garcia's last show before he died in Chicago.

[Jack Armstrong]

Did you play a role or.

[Joe Getty]

Many years ago. And I fell sound asleep halfway through it. Fell asleep because I may have been overserved it was also. Well, yeah, okay. You call it what you want. It was a very hot summer day in Chicago.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, my God. If.

[Joe Getty]

Drinking beer and all, getting rid of it and sitting there baking in the sun in Soldier Field. Just baking. I'm surprised. I'm not. Is this all been. Maybe I'm dead. Maybe I died that day. And this has all been a prolonged hallucination.

[Jack Armstrong]

It was like 55 degrees in the middle of the concert for this one. So. Yeah, I didn't have that problem.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, you were better off, trust me.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know how John Mayer plays guitar with a giant winter coat on zipped up around his ears the way he did. He's flick flipping phenomenal, by the way. John Mayer is just freaking unreal.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, he's a monster.

[Jack Armstrong]

But he's not happy to have it come to an end. I don't know. There's not much said about why they decided to wrap it up. New York Times went deep on that over the weekend. But I did notice that Bob Weir, he would play for a while and then he would take his hand off and shake his hand a lot. And I hadn't seen that in videos before because I've watched a lot of Dead and Company videos over the last several years. Because I just like got into it when John Mayer joined, which I know makes me something. Something uncool among real dead.

[Joe Getty]

Advance Jerry come lately.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, something. But anyway, he wasn't doing that before. I wonder if he doesn't have something physical that's happening. He just can't play every night like that.

[Joe Getty]

Handful of my favorite musicians have had to give it up because of arthritis.

[Jack Armstrong]

Or how are you standing up there for three and a half hours and paying attention what you're doing? I'm dying out here. Standing for three and a half. I don't know, maybe they think about how much money they're making.

[Joe Getty]

Maybe they enjoy playing music. Listen to you, you cynic. You couldn't be a deadhead. I'm surprised you weren't drummed out of the stadium. I'm getting bad vibes from the bald man over here, man. Get out.

[Jack Armstrong]

It was definitely the single best vibe at. At that scale that I've ever been around in my life. And man, that's a heck of a thing to pull off. I doubt it'll ever be recreated. Certainly not for that length. Not possible.

[Joe Getty]

Not in the modern world, no.

[Armstrong and Getty]

Armstrong and Getty.

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[Armstrong and Getty]

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[Katie]

Cheers.

[Armstrong and Getty]

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[Jack Armstrong]

Times with a hilariously long article about pants and how wide pants are in now and skinny pants are out. Which it was hilarious. I read quite a bit of it just because I was. I found it hilarious how seriously they took this topic and how in depth they went in the New York Times about it. But anyway, that we then played a little clip of Lyndon Baines Johnson, President of the United States from 63 to 68, talking to his tailor on the phone about his pants. And Katie had never heard it before because Katie's new to the show. Roughly how long you been here? A year?

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Wow. Time flies.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yikes. So this is Linda Mae Johnson who had his pants special made by a tailor back in Texas. And LBJ was, was, was a corn pone. That's actually what the Kennedy people called him. Colonel Cone. Corn pone to his face. Nice relationship. Anyway, he's from small town Texas and he's talking to his tailor about getting a new pair of pants ordered. And it sounded something like this.

[Lyndon Baines Johnson]

Mr. Hager? Yes. It's Joe Hager. Joe, is your father the one that makes clothes? Yes, sir. We're on. Y'all made me some real lightweight slacks that he just made up on his own. Sent to me three or four months ago. It's a kind of a light brown and a light green. Rather soft green and soft brown. And they're real lightweight. I need about six pairs wear around in the evening when I come in from work. And I need. They're about a half an inch too tight in the waist. Do you recall the exact size? I just wanted to be sure we get them right for you. No, I don't know. You all just guessed at them I think.

[Jack Armstrong]

Son.

[Lyndon Baines Johnson]

But wouldn't you have the measurements there? We'll find them for you. I can send you a pair. I want them half an inch larger in the waist than they were before. Except I want 2 or 3 inches of stuff left back in there so I can take them up. I vary 10 to 15 pounds a month. All right, so leave me at least two and a half, three inches in the back where I can let them out or take them up and put. Make these a half inch bigger than the waist, make the pockets at least an inch longer. My money and my knife and everything fall out. Wait just a minute. Now the pockets, when you sit down in the chair, the knife and your money comes out. So I need at least another inch in the pockets. Yeah. Now another thing with crutch down where you hang is always a little too tight. So when you make them up, give me an inch that I can let out there. Because they cut me. It's just like riding a wire fence. These are almost, these are the best that I've had anywhere in the United States. But when I gain a little weight, they cut me under there. So believe me, you never do have much margin there. See, if you can't leave me about an inch from where the zipper ends around under my back to my hole so I can let it out there if I need to. Now be sure you got the best zippers in them. These are good that I have. And if you get those to me, I would sure be grateful.

[Jack Armstrong]

There you go. At a historical moment, actual phone call with President of the United States.

[Joe Getty]

Cut me like I'm sitting on a wire fence.

[Jack Armstrong]

The fact that leave me much margin.

[Joe Getty]

You gotta have margin.

[Jack Armstrong]

The fact that he burps right before he uses the word is my favorite part.

[Joe Getty]

That is what.

[Katie]

That's one of my favorite pieces of audience ever.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's amazing. It shows you who he was. He was from poor Texas hill country to his bones. That's what he was.

[Katie]

Uh huh.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right.

[Joe Getty]

And it's probably worth the tip of the cap that he was calling the Hager family who became, you know, one of the, the great clothiers of that time of history.

[Jack Armstrong]

About five inches. Right back to my. We're hang.

[Joe Getty]

That's the best part. My crotch. You know where my. Yeah, we know what a crotch is. The reason people use the word crotch is so they don't have to say where your money. That's some plain talk there, got to tell you.

[Jack Armstrong]

And if you're actually into, you know, history and this sort of stuff, the Carol book about the, the relationship between LBJ and the Kennedy family is amazing because you just heard who the guy was. That's way different than the Kennedy clan.

[Joe Getty]

The Kennedys of Harvard.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, yeah. Hyannis Port Kennedys and their, you know, golf clubs and tennis clubs and that sort of stuff. No wonder they didn't get along with and vice versa with lbj. Oh my God.

[Joe Getty]

Where's their patrician accents and their crisp suits and the rest of it with practically no margin where they're hanging or hanged at the time.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, and it seem in the middle, it's like riding a rail fence. I mean, it's just. Oh my go.

[Katie]

Something my grandfather would say.

[Joe Getty]

Well, that's how you gain some weight, Brad. And it cuts me. Cuts me. Oof.

[Armstrong and Getty]

Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty.

[Jack Armstrong]

The Armstrong and Getty Show.

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[Katie Green]

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[Armstrong and Getty]

Just a few years ago, only 3% of domestic violence shelters accepted pets, meaning many abuse survivors had to choose between staying in a difficult situation for their pet or leaving their pet behind. One in three women and one in four men experience domestic abuse in their lifetime, and nearly half of survivors delay leaving because they can't bring their pets with them. Purina believes in the healing power of pets, particularly for survivors of abuse. They believe pets and people are better together, which is one of the many reasons they started the Purple Leash Project. Through the Purple Leash Project, Purina is helping break down one of the many barriers abuse survivors face. The lack of pet friendly domestic violence shelters. Purina has helped increase the amount of pet friendly shelters across the country from 3% to nearly 20% through the purple Leash Project. With more pet friendly domestic violence shelters, survivors and their pets can escape and heal together. Visit purina.compurple to get involved. Here's to the holidays. To baking cookies in matching pajamas. To decorating the house with paper chain garland. To gathering around the table for the holiday toast.

[Jack Armstrong]

Cheers.

[Armstrong and Getty]

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[Jack Armstrong]

Is about the way I grill and the pictures I've tweeted out and Katie's complaint about my grilling re IQ differences, which we were talking about differences. Different kinds of intelligence. Earlier in the show, somebody texted jack seems to be brilliant at history, but then he puts his grilling utensils on the ground. So yes, there are different kinds of intelligence.

[Katie]

That is a great point.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Yes. The contrast, shocking.

[Jack Armstrong]

I, I don't know why I put the spatula on the ground and well.

[Katie]

Not just that, but then when we brought, when we pointed it out to you said, well, where else? Where should I put them? Anywhere else, Jack.

[Joe Getty]

Yes, Even on a paper towel on the ground. Although that's just partial credit. Did get this note from Dan in North Carolina. Carolina. I'm with you, Jack. I have zero interest in grilling and am convinced that half the men that claim to be interested are latent junior high schoolers desperate to fit in. So, like the brave masked intellectual walking your parade route, I say F you to those who boast.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I don't mean there. I don't think there's got to be a flaw in other people that like to grill. I just, I just don't enjoy it and I have no interest in learning to be better at it.

[Joe Getty]

And then Dan spins a tale worth telling. As an aside, I have a relative by marriage. Of course, that fancies himself a master griller. So the propane grill was too bourgeois. So he purchased the same charcoal grill you have, except apparently couldn't figure out how to install the legs. So he just put it on top of a deck railing. Then he lit the fire in there, burned a hole almost completely through a plywood table and emblazoned the leaves around the carport, which led to a fire department visit. Emblazoned. He is is in quotes like that reporter. Bet his stakes are great though.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

The grillest and the anti gorillas. Is that the newest default line, the dividing line in American society?

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah. So I'm giving up on that manly skill, but hoping I make for it in other manly areas. Like if you couldn't put the legs on that grill, you really have no ability to fix or work on anything. Holy crap. They're like, yeah, two screws and a wing nut. Yes, Katie.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, Card is at risk.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, I say.

[Katie]

I just think that if you, if you had a different grill, it might change your experience a little bit. Yeah, they can't be comfortable being down in that position grilling at all. No, it's not comfortable in that position doing anything Right.

[Jack Armstrong]

How much did you spend for that grill, Jack? I honestly think it was on sale. I think it was $8 because it was on sale. It was like they had two left.

[Joe Getty]

Should you spend dollar grill a guy now he's lying.

[Katie]

He stole it from the guy that lives in front of the radio station.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. Lives in his beaten down rv.

[Joe Getty]

It's the mini Weber. Right. That sits like a foot off the ground. The top of it's a foot and a foot, maybe a foot and a half.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I think it's designed to take with you camping or something.

[Joe Getty]

It's not designed for tailgate.

[Jack Armstrong]

The grill you have in your backyard.

[Joe Getty]

Right. Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

It's kind of funny when I've been looking for a house and some of these houses, you know, they got the built in grill with the refrigerator and just all he did in a fan above it and all these different things. This is slightly different than what I currently have.

[Joe Getty]

Anson says he knows a place you could buy a bunch of used grills.

[Jack Armstrong]

There you go. Yeah, I should do. Yeah, One with legs would be handy if I didn't have to bend over. Anyway, that's probably enough of that. This was from the Daily show last night. Once a week, the old host of the Daily Show, Jon Stewart is on there. Pretty funny.

[Joe Getty]

Well, he's actually funny, which is in contrast with the other hosts. It's certainly Trevor. Noah. Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

This features a word I knew I've never said and never will say. And other people think this sort of humor is funny, and so we didn't air it on the air. But I realize other people find this humorous.

[Katie Green]

As I was explaining, though, the media.

[Jack Armstrong]

Has systematically failed to contextualize.

[Katie]

Sean, please.

[Jack Armstrong]

You're killing me.

[Armstrong and Getty]

My poor, sweet, naive, older than I remember.

[Jack Armstrong]

John. What?

[Armstrong and Getty]

We need this messy spectacle. Every other news story is a massive bummer. This Trump trial is like an open window in a Greyhound bus full of farts.

[Jack Armstrong]

Why you trying to close the window, John?

[Joe Getty]

Why you trying to make us smell farts?

[Jack Armstrong]

I'm not trying to make you smell farts.

[Katie]

No, John, you trying to make a.

[Katie Green]

Smell for the farts.

[Jack Armstrong]

You know I would never do that. And Hansen, our executive producer, thought that was funny. I don't like that word. I don't say that word. To me, that is the F word. And so I will never understand that. I don't understand it myself, but I'm appalled by that word. And I do not find there any humor in the topic.

[Joe Getty]

Okay, all right, Captain Cuckoo. Whatever. I'm interested in the angle of. We need this story. It's a breath of fresh air. I mean, it's. Is that just the lefty insanity or.

[Jack Armstrong]

I find it very troubling focusing on what time he arrived, what his hair looked like, did he fall asleep. Just something that's just that. As opposed to super heavy duty war, abortion, etc. I guess.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. The weaponizing of the justice system against political candidates is light, fair. It's hilarious. I think I could stay awake.

[Jack Armstrong]

I thought it was pretty funny that that young correspondent said, older than I remember.

[John Mayer]

John Stewart.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's right. She probably was watching him in, like, junior high and really into it. Now she's on the Daily Show. He's a.

[Joe Getty]

Well. And you know how it is. If you see somebody, then see him five years later. It's like, oh, God, I had one.

[Jack Armstrong]

Of those the other day. I ran into somebody and thought, did. Did I? Have I aged the same amount since the last time I saw you? As you have. That can't possibly be true.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, well, okay, does I think.

[Jack Armstrong]

I'm pretty sure. I didn't take a lot of physics, but I'm pretty sure time moves the same rate for all of us. Right.

[Joe Getty]

Unless one finds oneself in a black hole. Yes. That is my understanding of it.

[Jack Armstrong]

So if I run into somebody and they've aged a certain amount, it would lead me to believe that I've aged the same Amount too. I just haven't recognized it. Am I correct there?

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, sure. See yourself every day.

[Jack Armstrong]

This probably doesn't happen to you, does it, Katie? You're too young for that.

[Katie]

No, it has. I've seen some people from high school, I'm like, oh, you're aging like dreamer.

[Joe Getty]

Can you tell them that?

[Katie]

No, my face probably does. I, I am the master of saying it with my facial expressions, unfortunately.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. People do age at different rates, though. I mean, there's a biggest swing is 15 years, they say, and, and what age you look once you get older, depending on genetics and lifestyle. So it's not completely true that we aged the same amount.

[Joe Getty]

And I'm realizing the ultimate do you want to look good now or later? Is sun exposure.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, wow. I have a female friend who all her friends say, why do you look so young? And it's all because she did not tan when she was younger like they all did. And she does look, she's 15 years younger than her contemporaries, at least.

[Joe Getty]

Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

So it is tough. Do you want to be pale person at the pool when you're 22 or do you want to be looks 40 at age 50 person when you're older?

[Katie]

That's a tough call, Leatherface.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. I definitely find myself as I am rapidly aging among. You got your tans too much young woman. Then you got your tens too much 40 year old woman. And you're starting to see the signs of what might be described as a catcher's mitt like dermis. And then you have your 60 plus tanned too much woman. And man, them birds have come home to rooster. Hey, Butter.

[NFL Shop]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's a heck of a price to pay to be good and tan when you're 25. Really is.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. And again, I don't, I don't mean to be cruel. I don't measure people by their looks, but there's no better term than leathery. Remember we had a salesperson be referred to as tan guy.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, he was, he was. Yeah, he was super tan.

[Katie]

Yeah, he was it actual tan.

[Jack Armstrong]

I know it was real tan because we went to a company. Remember there was a company barbecue once and he did the really odd thing at this company barbecue, everybody stand out, where he took off his shirt and sat in a lawn chair with everybody around at the company barbecue so you could get more sun. So I guess, yes, he was tan guy.

[Katie]

All right.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Work function. Yeah. But hey, sun's out, guns out. And teeth apparently. Exactly. All right. I was in really good shape. But yeah, he was not going to waste a single opportunity to get more UV rays in him. Armstrong and Getty Things are getting weird and they're getting weird fast.

[Jack Armstrong]

Don't you think that's a little odd? Absolutely. There's no doubt in my mind this.

[Armstrong and Getty]

Is the Armstrong and Getty show.

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[Katie]

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[Katie Green]

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[Armstrong and Getty]

Just a few years ago, only 3% of domestic violence shelters accepted pets, meaning many abuse survivors had to choose between staying in a difficult situation for their pet or leaving their pet behind. One in three women and one in four men experience domestic abuse in their lifetime, and nearly half of survivors delay leaving because they can't bring their pets with them. Purina believes in the healing power of pets, particularly for survivors of abuse. They believe pets and people are better together, which is one of the many reasons they started the purple leash project. Through the Purple Leash Project, Purina is helping break down one of the many barriers abuse survivors face. The lack of pet friendly domestic violence shelters. Purina has helped increase the amount of pet friendly shelters across the country from 3% to nearly 20% through the purple Leash Project. With more pet friendly domestic violence shelters, survivors and their pets can escape and heal together. Visit purina.compurple to get involved. Here's to the holidays. To baking cookies in matching pajamas. To decorating the house with paper chain garland. To gathering around the table for the holiday toast. And the Chinette brand is here to share in the joy of it all. With the Chinette crystal collection, your holiday table is perfectly coordinated so you can achieve elegance with less cleanup, letting you focus on what really matters. Here's to the traditions that bring us together year after year. Here's to us, all of us. Find a local [e-mail] so Katie brought.

[Jack Armstrong]

Us this headline earlier in the show. Now I have the details. It's really something. The headline being a woman in Brazil was arrested after she attempted to get a dead body in a wheelchair to sign for a bank loan.

[Katie]

I was on Twitter or X or whatever the hell it's called now when this video went viral. So I saw the unedited version because now it's been blurred all over the place. This guy was dead dead. Like not just, not just like just dead, but like mega dead.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, really? Been dead a while.

[Joe Getty]

I mean, can you be more precise?

[Katie]

Not rigor mortis dead because she was able to kind of move him around, but he was super dead.

[Jack Armstrong]

So here we go. Woman in Brazil arrested Tuesday suspension of theft by fraud and violating a corpse. You know, as I've said many times, when I'm dead, you can do whatever you want to me. Don't charge with a crime. I don't care. It doesn't make any difference. I mean, you're a little weird, but you violated me in any way, I don't care.

[Joe Getty]

I may get a couple of likes in, you know, work out some frustrations.

[Katie]

Jack Pinata.

[Jack Armstrong]

After she, after she brought her dead uncle to a bank to sign a loan agreement. She had raised suspicion after she entered the small bank there in Rio with a man in a wheelchair who she called her uncle. Well, that's not, that would, why would that raise suspicion? That's not weird. The woman, and they give her name here, which I can't pronounce, reportedly reportedly told the clerk that they were to sign off on this 17,000 reass loan.

[Joe Getty]

That's a lot of RIAs, huh?

[Jack Armstrong]

$3,250 in security cameras footage, which Katie has seen. The woman can be seen picking up the man's hand and repositioning his head to try to get him to sign the document in front of him.

[Katie]

This guy's head was flopping all over the place.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, my.

[Katie]

Forward, backward, mouth open. And then she finally gets irritated enough to just get a grip on the back of his neck and she's holding him steady with the other hand. She's trying to pick up his arm and get it to hold the pen.

[Joe Getty]

Good, good plot. And you say that didn't work?

[Jack Armstrong]

His head's going all over the place.

[Katie]

Oh, yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

Can be picking up the hand, repositioning his head. Uncle, are you listening? You need to sign. If you don't sign, there's no way because I can't sign for you. She can be heard saying on the.

[Joe Getty]

Audio, I will just steady your hand, all right?

[Jack Armstrong]

Uncle, are you listening? You need to sign. He doesn't say anything. That's just how he is. She tells the clerk when he doesn't reply. If you're not okay, I'm going to take you to the hospital. But the man.

[Joe Getty]

Don't bother.

[Jack Armstrong]

The man's unresponsive nature and lolling head as described by Katie Green, caused concern among bank employees who called local ambulance services.

[Joe Getty]

Dude is mega dead.

[Jack Armstrong]

On arriving, the Doctors confirmed the 60 year old man had been dead for quite some time. His body was taken directly to a morgue and she's been arrested.

[Katie]

Creative idea.

[Jack Armstrong]

Her lawyers are arguing. No, no, no, no, he was fine. He must have died in the wheelchair as I was rolling into the bank.

[Joe Getty]

Just before he signed, because we talked.

[Jack Armstrong]

About this right out on the sidewalk before I rolled him in. And he must have died right beforehand and I did. I just didn't notice.

[Katie]

Not an effing chance.

[Armstrong and Getty]

Not.

[Joe Getty]

And he was, you know, he was never that energetic in life, so I didn't notice the difference.

[Katie]

And his eyes just naturally sunk into his head like that.

[Joe Getty]

He always looked that way. Megaded.

[Jack Armstrong]

Preliminary. Preliminary forensic analysis says he had died at least several hours before the trying to sign for the loan, if not longer.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, but if your uncle Enrique kicks it, I mean, just between you decide, all right, we're going in on this loan together. And he croaks just before you go to the bank. It's frustrating, it's inconvenient. I say we stick with plan A and see how it goes.

[Jack Armstrong]

We come up with a workaround. That's what that Is. It's a workaround.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

You try not to let his head flop all over and you lift his hand up there.

[Joe Getty]

As big a hit as Weekend at Bernie's was, it's amazing to me that dragging a corpse around comedy didn't become a more important genre.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. There's only one movie to refer to, that one. There isn't like a whole bunch of them.

[Joe Getty]

I mean, American Pie spawned dozens of imitators, for instance.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right, Exactly.

[Katie]

There was a few years ago where the Weekend at Bernie's funeral went viral. Do you guys remember that?

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know that.

[Joe Getty]

I do remember the headline.

[Katie]

There were, like, a series of funerals. I think Buzzfeed did like, an article about it and compiled a list of people that instead of just having, like, a regular visitation or whatever, had themselves, like, dressed and propped up with, like, cigarettes put in their hands.

[Jack Armstrong]

I love that.

[Katie]

And the families were coming up and, like, taking pictures with them, and there was another one that was a weightlifter and they actually attached their hands to, like, a deadlift.

[Jack Armstrong]

You see, it depends on the situation though, clearly, because, like, my friends would think it was fine. Yeah. But my kids might not. I hope, you know, it depends on your relationship with who it is.

[Joe Getty]

So I'm picturing. All right. I mean, if. If you had me sitting in a chair with my telecaster in my lap.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right.

[Joe Getty]

You know, that's not bad. Or maybe like, some red climbed on the couch with a half empty scotch next to me, like I was watching a golf tournament and fell asleep. My wife would. My wife would appreciate that one. Oh, okay.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, yeah, I guess it depends, but. Yeah, I could see that. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. There's a lot of caveats to the whole idea, I suppose.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Katie]

The weightlifting one got my attention though, because the. The way that they have her pr. Her propped up and then they have a bench press over her face like she's about to just do a big old lift.

[Joe Getty]

I can't decide if this idea is. Is more charming or horrifying. I keep going back and forth.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right. I agree. Is it like. Like you want to see him more like. Like he lived.

[Joe Getty]

Oh.

[Katie]

Or I guess that could be charming.

[Joe Getty]

Ish.

[Jack Armstrong]

Or it's horrifying.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. You know, one thing that I'm in favor of is, like, for an obituary or. Or a service or something like that. I don't like it when they have, like, the most recent picture when. When the person is ancient.

[Katie]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Because as anybody past the age of 50 especially can tell you in your heart, your Soul. Who you are is your young self, and you just have aches and pains and more memories and a little more wisdom and that sort of thing. But the old dude is kind of a stranger. You're like, how the hell did that happen? So I just. When they were youngest. Vital. Most vital, energetic. When they were forming who they are. Give me that picture.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, the New York Times is good at that. They use you and your prime picture for all their obituaries of famous people. I like. I see them every Sunday in the New York Times Book Review. Whatever author died. And they have their. When they were, you know, a hot, sexy woman or a cool young guy or whatever. Whatever they were that had so much to do with the things you wrote. Not like just an old person. Yeah.

[Katie]

The time of their life that they look back on fondly.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

And. And what they probably became famous for. And now we're not talking just about famous people, but like, in. Yeah. And just for everybody. I agree.

[Joe Getty]

Now, I've kind of been a doughy from age 12 through the grave, so it'd be easier for me, but. Yes. Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

I was gonna say what. What point do I get to choose ahead of time? What point? Because, like, yeah, we'll pick him when it was he. Young and vital. High school. Here's a good high school picture. Nah, I don't want that.

[Joe Getty]

Young but not vital. Let's keep looking.

[Katie]

I'm writing down my new favorite slam, a Doughy Dip.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, there you go. You're a Doughy Dip, aren't you?

[Joe Getty]

All right, for my funeral, I'm gonna do radio stuff. I'm gonna have open casket with me sitting up with headphones on my head.

[Katie]

Holding up three fingers.

[Jack Armstrong]

Exactly. Counting us down.

[Katie]

And then we'll have Jack and Joe. They're screaming at you.

[Jack Armstrong]

And then.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, oh, hey. And then you can donate money to pay any FCC fines.

[Jack Armstrong]

So we would say. I don't know why we're assuming we're going to outlive you, because I don't think we are. We would be there saying, just. Where's the clip, Michael? Just for old time's sake.

[Joe Getty]

That would be great. No clip. 42. 42. Oh, that's right. He's passed. God rest his soul.

[Jack Armstrong]

Quick question for you. What if you happen to miss this unbelievable radio program?

[Joe Getty]

The answer is easy, friends. Just download our podcast, Armstrong and Getty on Demand. It's the podcast version of the broadcast show, available anytime, any day. Every single podcast platform known to man.

[Jack Armstrong]

Download it now. Armstrong and Getty on Demand.

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[Joe Getty]

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Say hey Meta, how do I make.

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[Jack Armstrong]

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[Joe Getty]

Oh yeah, because now they could listen to one audiobook title a month from an enormous library of popular audiobook titles.

[Jack Armstrong]

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[Joe Getty]

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[Armstrong and Getty]

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