Armstrong & Getty On Demand

Episode: "Trump, Keep Your Hands Off This Woman's Penis"

March 30, 2026 | iHeartPodcasts

Episode Overview

In this episode, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty dive into the countrywide "No Kings" protests—nominally anti-Trump demonstrations that evolved into a grab bag of progressive causes, from anti-war and anti-ICE to the outright promotion of communism. The hosts dissect the media's handling of protest coverage, the presence of far-left ideologies, the incoherence of modern protest movements, and the growing polarization in America. Sprinkled through are their signature humor, mockery, and frank societal commentary.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. "No Kings" Protests: Message or Mishmash?

• Protests as a Progressive Gong Show (03:46; 27:39):

  • Jack and Joe open by discussing the motivations and messaging of the "No Kings" protests, mocking how the marches morph from anti-Trump sentiment to a laundry list of left-leaning complaints—anti-war, anti-ICE, pro-union, housing costs, and more.
  • Jack: "It's just a mishmash of we're progressives and we want more of the things we want. But again, it was puffed up and polished and made simplified by the media just to be presented as some sort of monolithic anti Trump gloriousness." (29:03)
  • They highlight the performative aspect, with veteran protest icons like Jane Fonda and Bruce Springsteen present.

• Communism Front and Center (12:00; 30:14; 40:18):

  • A recurring, startling theme is the prominent and unashamed advocacy for communism among protestors.
  • Audio Clip: [12:00] "There is only one solution. Communist revolution."
  • Joe is amazed at how hundreds visibly carry hammer and sickle flags—contrasting the lack of media scrutiny with how a handful of troublemakers at right-wing protests get wall-to-wall coverage.
  • Joe: “The ideology that killed more people than any other maybe ever in the history of the world had a big contingent marching in the No Kings protest. And it doesn't make the news...” (12:49)

2. Media Coverage: A Double Standard (08:48; 13:35; 29:56)

• Left vs. Right Coverage:

  • The hosts lament the mainstream media’s habit of sanitizing progressive protests while highlighting every bad sign at right-wing events.
  • Jack: "If we had even something close to honest coverage of these things, it would be a completely different reality in the minds of the American people who don't go to the idiotic protests." (13:35)

• Satire & The Babylon Bee (23:19):

  • They draw on a Babylon Bee headline to argue that the “woke apocalypse” is over:
    • "Black half of Tiger Woods tased by cops after Asian half crashes the car."
  • Jack notes: “That’s provocative. Trafficking stereotypes I’m surprised at the Babylon. ...it’s a sign that the woke apocalypse is clearly over.” (23:40)

3. The Permanent Protest Bloc & Identity Coalitions (32:22)

• Protest as Omnicause:

  • Jack describes the modern left/progressive movement as a "permanent omnicause" or even "the NATO of grievance," where interest groups form alliances of convenience regardless of cause.
  • Jack: "The teachers union swears to the transgender crowd, we'll stick with you if you'll stick with us... The welfare fraudsters in Minneapolis say, alright, you cover our ass and we're with y'. That's the solidarity she's talking [about]." (32:22)

• Diversity & the Optics of Protest (34:03):

  • Discussion of a white protester's assertion about POC absence due to safety concerns, which Jack and Joe skewer as condescending.
  • Protest Participant: “If anybody’s gonna get arrested here, it’s gonna be a black person. ...We need to walk in their name.” (34:08)

4. Fragmented American Political Identity (36:01; 37:15)

• Polarization to the Extreme:
  • The episode features protestors declaring unwavering loyalty to Democrats:
    • "I voted blue in the womb." (36:04)
    • "If you had to vote for Republican J.D. Vance or Rubio, which one would you pick...?"
      "I would slit my throat." (36:12)
  • Joe: “That poll, that worldwide poll... we’re the only country in the world where the majority thinks the other side is evil.” (37:09)
  • Both hosts express grave concern about America’s ability to function with such entrenched division.

5. Historical Reframing & the Rehabilitation of Communism (14:55)

• DARVO and the "Success" of the Left:
  • Jack introduces the concept of DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender) to explain how the narrative shifted from anti-communist hysteria to ignoring active communist sympathies.
  • Jack: "...they [the left] seized on those excesses and said the excesses are the entire movement... And they successfully transmitted that message." (14:55)

6. Other Notable Topics

• Sunday Talk Shows Are Obsolete:

  • Joe complains about their irrelevance and media negativity, focusing on war coverage and the Sun Tzu “inscrutability” contradiction. (08:48)

• Tiger Woods Crash & AI Foresight Woes (21:58; 49:02):

  • Lighthearted banter about Tiger Woods’ ongoing vehicular troubles, connecting it to media and AI misinformation.
  • Listener Email: About Google Gemini AI recapping events before they officially happened, raising concerns about AI’s role in news and even national security. (49:02)

• Armstrong & Getty’s Ongoing Pessimism (49:36):

  • Multiple listener emails encourage the hosts to dedicate some time each week to positivity or uplifting stories, which is met with mock-resignation and wry optimism.

Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On protest incoherence:

  • Joe: "So I just, I don’t even know what the protest is about." (32:13)

• On the spectacle of protest:

  • Jack: “I did see some dudes with women’s breasts in their shirts off... with signs that said something like, you know, Donald Trump, keep your hands off of this woman’s penis, or something like that.” (32:59)

• On communist chants at the march:

  • Audio: "Communism is gonna win, baby." (12:47; 30:37; 40:18)

• On media hypocrisy:

  • Jack: “But you know, I might as well wish for Sauvignon blanc falling from the clouds to fill my glass for free. It’s not going to happen. I just need to get over.” (13:35)

• On polarization:

  • Joe: “We can’t function like this... There’s nobody left who even comes close to having an idea what’s actually happening.” (35:39–35:53)

Significant Segments & Timestamps

• Opening banter and band contest stories: 03:44–07:24
• "No Kings" protest coverage begins (Communist chants): 11:58–14:55
• Discussion of protest composition/media treatment: 27:39–33:21
• White protester explains marching for black people: 34:03–34:25
• Extreme partisan identity ("voted blue in the womb"): 36:01–36:14
• America’s political fragmentation and consequences: 37:09
• Listener mailbag and positivity debate: 49:36–50:19
• Comic relief—Babylon Bee headline, Tiger Woods banter: 23:19; 46:58

Conclusion

With characteristic irreverence, Armstrong & Getty question the purpose and coverage of modern protest culture, highlighting inconsistencies in media narratives and the dangerous normalization of extreme ideologies, while lamenting the loss of national cohesion. Their blend of mockery, concern, and cultural critique makes this episode both lighter fare and deeply sobering for listeners wrangling with American identity and polarization in 2026.