Weak Flaccid Body Sold Separately

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand – Episode: "Weak Flaccid Body Sold Separately" | Release Date: June 3, 2025

Hosts: Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty | Source: iHeartPodcasts

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1. Violent Attack in Boulder, Colorado

The episode opens with Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty discussing a disturbing incident in Boulder, Colorado, involving Mohamed Sabri Salman, a 45-year-old man charged with 16 counts of attempted murder and federal hate crimes. Salman, allegedly dressed as a gardener, shouted "Free Palestine" and threw Molotov cocktails into a crowd.

• Joe Getty (00:14): "That's one of the good or bad things about Molotov cocktails, depending on how you look at it."

The hosts delve into Salman's motivations, highlighting his anti-Zionist rhetoric and intention to cause harm.

• Jack Armstrong (00:30): "He seems pretty crazy, but yes. Katie, no."

Katie Green chimes in, questioning the classification of the act as terrorism.

• Katie Green (01:43): "How is that not terrorism?"

Joe asserts that authorities have labeled it terrorism due to the political motivations behind the attack.

• Joe Getty (01:45): "It's a definition of terrorism."

They further discuss Salman's meticulous planning, revealing he had five children at home and waited until his youngest graduated high school before committing the crime.

• Joe Getty (03:55): "He had five kids. He waited till the last one got out of high school... and then he goes and commits this crime."

2. Border Security and Immigration Concerns

The conversation shifts to border security, featuring commentary from Tom Holman, a former FBI official, who expresses alarm over unvetted immigrants creating national security vulnerabilities.

• Tom Holman (05:12): "They created the biggest national security vulnerability this country's ever seen."

Joe Getty analyzes the implications of Holman's statements, emphasizing that even a small percentage of unvetted individuals could pose significant threats.

• Joe Getty (05:26): "You don't need a very high percentage of 2 million who came into this country when the border was basically wide open... that big horrifying situation."

Katie raises concerns about the mental toll on Salman's family, particularly his daughter who just graduated high school.

• Katie Green (04:21): "What kind of mental damage is that gonna do to his daughter that just graduated?"

3. Radicalization and University Environments

Joe and Jack briefly touch upon the role of universities in fostering extremist ideologies, pondering whether phrases like "Free Palestine from the river to the sea" contribute to radicalization.

• Joe Getty (07:34): "How much of the zeitgeist... is okay to say things like Free Palestine from the river to the sea... how much is that have an effect on the radicals or the crazies?"

4. Crisis in Male Friendships

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to exploring the alleged crisis in adult males' ability to form friendships. Joe Getty opens the discussion, prompting hosts to define what constitutes a friend.

• Joe Getty (10:39): "I don't have a single other male that I talk to on a regular basis in my life..."

Katie and Jack contribute personal anecdotes, debating whether workplace relationships qualify as genuine friendships.

• Joe Getty (12:23): "Oh, that's a sad excuse for friends if you're counting your work friends."

The hosts consider the social implications of declining male friendships and its impact on mental health and societal cohesion.

5. Prison Escapes and Presidential Pardons

The discussion transitions to recent prison escapes in New Orleans, highlighting systemic issues within the prison system and the involvement of officials in aiding these escapes.

• Joe Getty (14:00): "The whole pardon thing is completely out of control... administration by administration."

They critique President Biden's pardon strategies, particularly the pardoning of family members and political adversaries.

• Joe Getty (25:19): "The pardoning power is so incredibly broad, which is one of the problems with it."

Additionally, Joe addresses a legal case involving Sean "Diddy" Combs, who allegedly tried to bribe a security guard to alter surveillance footage of an assault.

• Katie Green (16:11): "The security guard... testified that he initially lied to the cops because he didn't want anything to do with this."

6. Retail Return Policies and Ethical Consumerism

In an extensive segment, Joe Getty and Katie Green analyze the current state of retail return policies, emphasizing the ease with which consumers can abuse these systems.

• Joe Getty (30:18): "17% of all sales by retailers are returned now."

They discuss societal attitudes towards returns, noting a generational divide where younger consumers are more likely to exploit generous return policies.

• Joe Getty (32:16): "Do we just have lower moral... Why does the younger crowd have lower morals about that sort of thing?"

Katie shares common practices like searching for promo codes, while Joe critiques the ethical implications of such behaviors.

• Katie Green (34:29): "I type in the website followed by 'promo code'... and bam, 10 bucks off."

The conversation underscores the delicate balance retailers must maintain between accommodating honest returns and preventing policy abuse.

7. Final Thoughts and Humorous Exchanges

The episode concludes with light-hearted banter about personal experiences and humorous observations, such as the challenges of securing friendships and amusing anecdotes from past jobs.

• Katie Green (39:08): "I can't believe I'm still watching this eagle that hasn't flown yet."

Joe teases about potentially conducting a plank contest in an upcoming segment, blending humor with fitness tips.

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Key Takeaways:

• Extreme Political Violence: The Boulder incident exemplifies the dangers of politically motivated violence and the ease of access to harmful materials online.

• Border Security Concerns: Unvetted immigration poses significant national security risks, as highlighted by former FBI officials.

• Social Isolation Among Men: There is a perceived decline in meaningful male friendships, raising concerns about social support structures.

• Abuse of Pardoning Power: Presidential pardons, especially when targeting family and political figures, are controversial and may undermine trust in the justice system.

• Ethical Consumerism: Generous return policies, while beneficial for honest consumers, are increasingly subject to exploitation, prompting retailers to rethink their strategies.

Notable Quotes:

• Joe Getty (00:14): "That's one of the good or bad things about Molotov cocktails, depending on how you look at it."

• Joe Getty (01:45): "It's a definition of terrorism."

• Katie Green (04:21): "What kind of mental damage is that gonna do to his daughter that just graduated?"

• Joe Getty (05:12): "They created the biggest national security vulnerability this country's ever seen."

• Joe Getty (32:16): "Do we just have lower moral... Why does the younger crowd have lower morals about that sort of thing?"

• Katie Green (34:29): "If you find it, finders keepers, go for it."

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This episode of "Armstrong & Getty On Demand" offers a blend of serious discussions on national security, social issues, and ethical consumer behavior, interspersed with the hosts' characteristic humor and personal anecdotes. Listeners gain insights into contemporary challenges while enjoying engaging and dynamic conversations.

Transcript

[Jack Armstrong]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Joe Getty]

Broadcasting live from the Abraham Lincoln radio studio at.

[Jack Armstrong]

The George Washington Broadcast Center. Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty.

[Joe Getty]

Armstrong and Getty. And now here's Armstrong and Getty. 45 year old Mohamed Sabri Salman, now facing 16 charges of attempted murder as well as federal hate crime charges. Authorities say the suspect dressed as a gardener to avoid looking suspicious Sunday when he yelled free Palestine and tossed two Molotov cocktails into a crowd. Authorities saying the suspect allegedly learned how to make them on YouTube. Yeah, well, there's not a lot to making a Molotov cocktail. You can learn it pretty quickly on YouTube. That's one of the good or bad things about Molotov cocktails, depending on how you look at it. Talking about the terrorist, crazy person in Boulder, Colorado, trying to set a bunch of people on fire. Nobody is dead yet, luckily, but a whole bunch of people with some really bad burns. Let's go on with a little more information about this dude. What I came to see was an erratic man, which was the attacker pacing back and forth with the two Molotov cocktails in his hands. The attacker was yelling things like, you effing Zionists kill my people. I kill you. In pointing different people, saying, you're a killer, you're a killer. Making eye contact with me, telling me that I was a killer and he'll kill us. Yeah, he seems pretty crazy, but yes. Katie, no.

[Katie Green]

How is that not terrorism?

[Joe Getty]

Well, yeah, that's a good point. Only in Boulder, Colorado, which is like Berkeley or Davis or, you know, Nate, Columbia name your big college town. Boulder is like that. I mean, the FBI immediately was on to it being terrorism. So was the governor, who's a Democrat, so was the state attorney general, who's a Democrat. Called the terrorism off the bat because the guy made it clear what he was doing. He was attacking people for political reasons, to, to try to affect the political outcome, which is a definition of terrorism. Here's John Miller, former FBI, on cnn yesterday, the idea that he planned this for all this time, knowing he's got a wife, five children at home, and that he intended to stay and get caught, that's a remarkable shift from what we've seen where people spontaneously do these things by throwing it together in a week or planning to die at the scene or flee. Yeah, that is interesting. So both this guy yelling free Palestine and the dude two weeks ago who killed that young couple that was going to get married in cold blood, they both were perfectly happy to be arrested, both, you know, voluntarily laid down on the ground to get cuffed, both of them. So that was part of their plan not to go out and hail the bullets or whatever. I don't know. I don't know if they feel like they're gonna be martyrs in jail or what that is. And by the way, the guy yesterday in the courtroom said, yeah, I did it. I did it to kill Jews, and I will do it again if you let me out. I mean, he's not hiding it. And then I'm sure his lawyer was like, hey, easy. Shut up. But he's not hiding it at all.

[Katie Green]

God, the amount of hate you harbor to have five kids at home and just say, f it, this is what I'm gonna do.

[Joe Getty]

Well, according to the story, he went to try to buy guns. He got turned down because he's an illegal. Now, we don't have a system in place, apparently, where the one federal database that find that tells the gun owner or the gun shop, this guy's illegal. She can't sell him a gun. Doesn't meet up with the other database that says, we got an illegal here trying to buy a gun. And you put them together and you arrest the guy or kick him out or whatever.

[Katie Green]

You're getting a little ahead of yourself. It's only 20, 25, Jack. Yeah, we'll get there.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. So he tries to make gun. He can't do that. So he goes online, learns how to make Molotov cocktails. He had had five kids. He waited till the last one got out of high school. That's what he was waiting for. He'd been waiting for the last year and a half planning this thing. Wanted to make sure his last kid got out of high school. And then he goes and commits this crime. And he'll be in prison for the rest of his life.

[Katie Green]

What kind of mental damage is that gonna do to his daughter that just graduated? That he was waiting for?

[Joe Getty]

Well, he doesn't care about that, obviously. So now we got Tom Holman, who is our border czar, wondering, how many people like this have we let into the country?

[Tom Holman]

They created the biggest national security vulnerability this country's ever seen. Not only did 2 million known godaways, two people cross the border, we don't know who they are, where they came from. We don't know where they are. Now, on top of that, even through the legal process, the Biden administration were bringing people unvetted, handing out work fees like their candy while they sat here and planned something bad. We are going to be dealing with this for the next 10 years because of the chaos they created in four years, 2 million people paid more to get away. They didn't want to be vetted. They didn't want to be fingerprinted.

[Joe Getty]

Why?

[Tom Holman]

This scares the hell out of me. I've been doing this for 40 years. It should have scared the hell out of every American. What the Biden administration did this. Two men known got aways scares the hell out of me. So I'm convinced something's coming unless we can find them.

[Joe Getty]

You know, it's just math. You don't need a very high percentage of 2 million who came into this country when the border was basically wide open, who want to do us harm to have thousands of people in this country that came here specifically to do harm of one kind of another, whether it's Chinese spies or Islamo fascists of one breed or another or part of the various cartels down in Mexico or whatever it is. Like I said, you don't need a very big percentage of 2 million to get 2000s. And that's what Holman said. It keeps him up at night. Worries the hell out of him more than anything in 40 years. And this guy was in an Egyptian that came in here and overstayed his visa like 313,000 other people did in the year 2023. That's how many people overstayed their, their visas and got to just hang out. And again, quite a few. The vast majority, like practically all of them, I'm sure meaning no harm to the United States other than perhaps living off the taxpayer. But doesn't take very many when you got the numbers. That big horrifying situation and Right what you said, Katie, the amount, the hate that you would have to have.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

To one, be willing to spend the rest of your life in jail, leave your family behind and everything like that. How about the guy in D.C. who that woman he shot. The guy in, the woman soon to be fiance, male, is dead though. The soon to be bride crawling away for her life and he walks up behind her and executes her there on the sidewalk. How would you create in your mind such a hatred where you discount that person's life so much that you could do that most people couldn't shoot a dog, let alone a human being in a situation like that?

[Katie Green]

Well, that's what it makes these universities even scarier, I think, because it's like being bred into these people.

[Joe Getty]

And that's the big question is how much of the zeitgeist, the, the, the, you know, the feeling in the air of it's okay to say things like Free Palestine from the river to the sea, which is basically saying Jews need to go or die. You know, how much is that? Is that have an effect on the radicals or the crazies? And I hope we don't find out, but there have been two deadly occurrences in the last two weeks of Free Palestine in the last two months. Three if you include the guy who tried to burn down Governor Shapiro's mansion with his whole family in it. And luckily nobody was hurt. But that was a Free Palestine guy too. This story's not over by a long shot. No doubt about that. We got a lot more on the way. I want to get to a couple of different topics, including do I want to get to this without Joe here. This whole Is there a crisis of men being able to make friends? Maybe I'll bring that up briefly and we'll get into it more again tomorrow. Among other things on the way. Stay here.

[Michaelangelo]

Armstrong and Getty Looking for a smarter way to teach your child to ride a bike and support American jobs at the same time? Most kids bikes are cheap imports, heavy, clunky and hard for kids to control. Guardian Bikes is changing that. Assembling bikes right here in USA with plans for full US Manufacturing in the next few months. It's a commitment to higher quality and American craftsmanship you can trust. Each bike is lightweight, low to the ground and built to help kids learn to ride faster, many in just one day. No training wheels needed. Guardian's patented sure Stop Braking system. One lever stops both wheels, giving your child more control, faster stops and prevents those scary head over handlebar accidents. It's so easy even a 2 year old can do it. If you're ready to support American jobs and keep your kids safe, head to guardian bikes.com today. You'll save hundreds compared to the competition. Join their newsletter. You'll get a free bike lock and pump a $50 value. Guardian bikes built in the USA made specifically for kids.

[Jack Armstrong]

Ever wish your child was a full blown liberal idiot desperate to turn them into a Jew hating extremist who'd rather burn a flag than think for themselves? Well, Harvard University has the answer or the low, low price of half a million dollars. We'll transform your kid into the kind of zealot who sets bags of silver on fire in the street, screaming about whatever CNN's whining about today. Our elite program guarantees they'll swap reason for rage and facts for feelings faster than you can say protest permit. But wait, there's more. Our tuition doesn't cover the essentials. Blue Hair dye, nose piercings and a weak, flaccid body are sold separately. And don't forget parents. You'll be footing the bill for these, plus financially supporting your adult child for the rest of their life because they'll never become productive members of society. Why work when you can protest Results not guaranteed. Side effects include chronic virtue signaling, allergic reactions to logic, and an obsession with trending hashtags. Harvard University is not liable for arrests, property damage, or your kid's newfound hatred of you. Consult your bank account before enrolling.

[Joe Getty]

Weak flaccid bodies sold separately. Yeah, I know someone. Well, actually I know several people, but one very well whose child came back from college lecturing them about their attitudes, which Yay. Sure glad I paid for that. Woohoo. Could have got a new car and you wouldn't be hating me right now. But instead I'm driving my old car so I could pay for you. Go to that college and come back and lecture me. Woo. Fantastic. Um, I'm not gonna get deep into this story right now. Cause I think I wanna save it for when Joe is here. He had to cut out early today in the New York Times. I've heard this come up a number of times recently. I don't know that I would have noticed it unless somebody pointed it out that it's difficult for adult males to make friends in the modern era. I don't know if this has always been true. I don't even know if it's. Like I said, I wouldn't have noticed if it's somebody hadn't pointed out. Do you sense that with your husband, Katie?

[Katie Green]

No, not first.

[Joe Getty]

First of all, I think I'd have to define what's a friend? Define friend for me. Somebody. Michael, what's a friend? I'd say somebody that you talk to on a regular basis. I mean, that's pretty good.

[Katie Green]

Maybe somebody that you.

[Joe Getty]

Well, define friends for me, Katie.

[Katie Green]

I would say Michael's on the right track. Somebody who you talk to on a regular basis and that you have some form of trust and respect for.

[Joe Getty]

I don't have a single other male that I talk to on a regular basis in my life, if that's the basis. I have many people that I respect, but I don't know. Is that a crisis? I talk to both my kids. They're males.

[Katie Green]

You talk to Anson, Michelangelo and Joe.

[Joe Getty]

Work doesn't count, does it?

[Katie Green]

Yeah, I think it does. I think it counts.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, that's a sad excuse for friends if you're counting your work friends.

[Katie Green]

Hey, I met my Husband at work. So I'm all. I think great relationships start at work because you already share something in common.

[Joe Getty]

Does HR know this?

[Katie Green]

I don't care.

[Joe Getty]

At this point, I suppose you're in the clear.

[Katie Green]

Who cares?

[Joe Getty]

I don't know. I have to bring this up when Joe's here tomorrow. See if he thinks that's true, that there's some sort of crisis with adult males making friends. Yes, Michael. No. I met my wife at work, so we, both, Katie and I, are in trouble. Do you not take the company HR tutorials? You're not supposed to ask people out.

[Katie Green]

It taught us how to do it.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. Wow. Hooking up with co workers. Not cool.

[Katie Green]

Mm.

[Joe Getty]

For the One More Thing podcast we do later today. This is a tease. And if you don't listen to the One More Thing podcast, you should. Katie, who's a workout fiend. You go to the gym all the time, partially driven there by health problems. Right, But. But that keeps you motivated. Health problem will keep a person motivated at the gym, which is good. Got some stuff about how long you should be able to be able to do a plank at different ages. Oh, and then I have some other questions about a couple other things.

[Katie Green]

So are we gonna have a plank off?

[Joe Getty]

We'll get into it. Well, that's a big question. And I also have a question about exercises for the gluteus maximus, because I've been working on my ass and I'm not having any luck.

[Katie Green]

So much thrusting.

[Joe Getty]

So on a more serious note, I think. I don't know, I actually haven't heard this. So, you know the people that escaped from prison down there in New Orleans, they've now arrested, what, a dozen people? Something like that. That. That helped in some way, and them escaping from that prison. Originally, it was just the one janitor, but now it's like a dozen or more that were involved in helping these people let. Get. Get, get out for whatever reason. So that's a problem with your prison. Try to hire people that are on the side of the state or the county and not on the side of the prisoner. Anywho, one of the dudes that got out and then they. They. They caught. Have they caught them all now, or is there still somebody on the list?

[Katie Green]

There's one still.

[Joe Getty]

I think there's one less. But one of the guys they caught did a video appealing to Donald Trump, and I haven't heard this yet. Can you play that for me, Michael? Clip number 10. Sorry, it's clip number 11. Is that right? Yeah, 11.

[Antoine Maxi]

He said that I Broke out. I didn't break out. I was let out. My name was Antoine Maxi. So I'm asking please for help. Young boy, meet Mills people, lbl. You know what I'm saying? People that been through the system that know it's corrupt. Lil Wayne, Donald Trump, Please, I'm asking for help. You know what I'm saying? When I get back in custody, I'm asking y' all please to come help you feel. I'm so asking the world. So I'm letting y' all know. I'm not a reaper, man. I'm not. None of that. None of that. I'm a good person. I am a father that want to be in my children.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, well, if you're a father, you can't be a bad person. A little hard to hear there, but he was saying he didn't. He didn't break out. He was let out by people who understand that the system is all screwed up. And he's appealing to Donald Trump for a pardon, which could work. I don't know. Trump's kind of all over the place with some of his pardons. It's interesting that that has become a thing with young black men appealing to Donald Trump thinking they can get out. I saw once again today that Rapa Suge Knight talking about it doesn't matter if Diddy gets convicted, Trump will pardon him. No way Trump's pardoning him.

[Katie Green]

Not a chance. No, no.

[Joe Getty]

That wouldn't be a good look. There's Diddy trial today. You had one little update for us.

[Katie Green]

Yeah. The security guard that was at the hotel the night that Diddy beat Cassie up, and we all saw that video footage from the surveillance.

[Joe Getty]

Man, that is awful.

[Katie Green]

Apparently he. Diddy tried to bribe him first of all by saying, hey, if you wipe that footage, I'll take care of you. Or the words that he used. And then the security guard started to cover for Diddy. So he actually has testified that he initially lied to the cops because he didn't want anything to do with this.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, that you should always be honest. And I think I would, especially if I saw a guy beating up a woman.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. But he had to be at least somewhat concerned about Diddy and his people coming after him. Without a doubt. And. And if he didn't, he should have. He should have been worried about it. But. So, but did he went with the old Pablo Escobar? I don't know. Does he get credit for inventing this? The silver or lead, as in I can pay you or lead is in a bullet. So do you want to? Which do you want? So Diddy offered him money right off the bat to erase the videotape, which obviously didn't happen.

[Katie Green]

I'll take care of you. Right.

[Joe Getty]

Which obviously didn't happen because we've all seen the videotape. And so that security guard was on.

[Katie Green]

The stand admitting that he's on the stand now. He's still up there.

[Joe Getty]

Okay, so he, he actually witnessed this. He was probably sitting in his office where he's supposed to there, and was watching the live video as it happened. Saw a young guy beating up a girl in the hallway. God, that's horrible. It's amazing. So Diddy walked out of there that night, Right. He wasn't arrested or anything?

[Katie Green]

Yeah, nothing came of it that night.

[Joe Getty]

God, you'd think you'd beat up a woman like that in the hallway of a hotel. And it's on videotape and a security guard sees it, you'd be going to jail. But not if you're Sean Diddy Combs. We got more on the way. I hope you can stay here.

[Michaelangelo]

Armstrong and Getty looking for a smarter way to teach your child to ride a bike and support American jobs at the same time. Most kids bikes are cheap imports, heavy, clunky and hard for kids to control. Guardian Bikes is changing that. Assembling bikes right here in the USA with plans for full US manufacturing in the next few months. It's a commitment to higher quality and American craftsmanship you can trust. Each bike is lightweight, low to the ground, and built to help kids learn to ride faster, many in just one day. No training wheels needed. Guardian's patented sure Stop braking system. One lever stops both wheels, giving your child more control, faster stops and prevents those scary head over handlebar accidents. It's so easy, even a 2 year old can do it. If you're ready to support American jobs and keep your kids Safe, head to guardianbikes.com today. You'll save hundreds compared to the competition. Join their newsletter. You'll get a free bike lock and pump. A $50 value Guardian bikes built in the USA, made specifically for kids.

[Jack Armstrong]

And there's also been a lot of discussion recently about your mental and physical capabilities while you were in office.

[Joe Getty]

You can see that I'm mentally incompetent and I can't walk and I can beat the hell out of both of them.

[Jack Armstrong]

Do you want to reply to any of those reports? And also to the fact that there are some Democrats who are now questioning whether you should have run for reelection in the first place?

[Joe Getty]

Why didn't they run against me then? Because I would have beaten them.

[Jack Armstrong]

Do you have any regrets?

[Joe Getty]

No, I don't. So, wow, when was that Hansen, when was that question asked of him? It was obviously post getting out of the race. It was just a couple of days ago. Oh, my God. Play that first part again.

[Jack Armstrong]

And there's also been a lot of discussion recently about your mental, mental and physical capabilities while you were in office.

[Joe Getty]

You can see that I'm mentally incompetent and I can't walk. And I can beat the hell out of both of them. Okay, turn him off there. So he's being sarcastic. Oh, yeah, you can see that I'm. I can't walk and I'm mentally incompetent. Yeah, you can't walk and you are mentally incompetent. That is every indication we've had, not only from watching you, but from the books and everything else. Does he. Is he still. Well, he's got dementia, so you can't ask the guy with dementia. Or is he just so programmed as a liar after being a politician his whole life or what? How is he still living in a world where he thinks he physically is okay even if he believes his mind is okay? He does. He's the one that started wearing Velcro shoes and using that lower ramp because he couldn't walk. Wow. Who's he think he's fooling at this point? That's wild. I don't even. I can't. That was a couple of days ago. He's still trying to pull it off.

[Katie Green]

Gosh, he sounds mean too.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, yeah. You watch me. I'm mentally incompetent and I can't walk. Correct. Take out the sarcasm and make those statements and you are correct. You are mentally incompetent and you can't walk. Wow.

[Katie Green]

Gosh, he sounds like one of the really pissed off old guys. I used to serve at the bar, like 8 o' clock in the morning.

[Joe Getty]

Eight in the morning?

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

You worked at a bar at 8 in the morning? Oh, yeah.

[Katie Green]

I worked 6am to 10am and there were people there when I got there third.

[Joe Getty]

Shifters or derelict alcoholics?

[Katie Green]

Derelict. Starting the day. Gotta get rid of the shakes.

[Joe Getty]

That's funny because I know a. There's a bar here in Sacramento. Is it the Zebra Club? Has a big sign out front, open, opens at 6:00am and people say, well, third shift, you know, you work the late shift and you want to go and it's like your happy hour. But in my experience, it's mostly alcoholics who need to get there really, really early, like before they go to work. That's been my experience. Yeah.

[Katie Green]

I worked that shift for six months, not a long time, but did not get one third shift.

[Joe Getty]

Oh, really?

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

So that's a complete ruse. Bars that are open those hours, that's for people who need a drink before they go to work or just to sit there in the stool all day long.

[Katie Green]

Yeah, they needed their Irish coffee to get themselves going is what's. What that is.

[Joe Getty]

Wow, that's interesting. I was never a morning drinker. I drank a lot, but I was never a morning drinker. I never could handle that. But I've known people that had to put on the suit and tie or you know, the, the female garb, whatever you're wearing and hit a place like that for a big stiff one before you get to work.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Then throughout the day you can only pull that off for so long. Usually as an interesting little nugget. I wasn't expecting Katie. So to describe the typical person, age, look, probably at the bar at 7am yeah, usually it's a fancy place or like a dive bar.

[Katie Green]

Oh, divey. Okay, good and divey. Early 70s to early 80s. Usually in pajamas, some kind of a windbreaker jacket.

[Joe Getty]

Still pulling it off in your 70s or 80s.

[Katie Green]

Yeah, yeah.

[Joe Getty]

And sounding kind of like Joe Biden.

[Katie Green]

Oh, and I had one guy that just used to get pissed if I did not have that Cadillac margarita already made and on the bar by the time he got there at 6:15. No, you know what I drank?

[Joe Getty]

True international depression.

[Katie Green]

Precisely, sir.

[Joe Getty]

Wow. And then did you have to stand there and make conversation with them as a young cute blonde?

[Katie Green]

Oh yeah. It was always. Yeah, yeah. And you know what? They were, they were fun to talk to that, you know, they, they get the old guy pass at that point.

[Joe Getty]

Sure. Exactly. Yeah. They're no, they're no real threat. And they know they're no real threat.

[Katie Green]

Yeah. Oh, do they? And they will say whatever comes to mind.

[Antoine Maxi]

Wow.

[Joe Getty]

An interesting glimpse.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Back to Joe Biden in the COVID up Bill or Peter Doocy doing a story for Fox and Friends. I haven't actually heard all this. It has to do with the pardons that Joe Biden unleashed. Remember the very last day on the.

[Peter Doocy]

Morning of Inauguration Day. The Biden family pardons were a surprise to us. But were they also a surprise to Joe Biden? That's what officials heard. Want to know the new scrutiny is on Biden era pardon. So that would include preemptive pardons for his sister Valerie, his brother Frank, his brother James and his wife Sarah. And then also for Trump critics like Mark Milley, Anthony Fauci, and Liz Cheney. This is coming today from a Reuters report where it says Ed Martin, the Justice Department's pardon attorney, wrote in an email seen by Reuters that the investigation involves whether Biden was competent and whether others were taking advantage of him through use of auto pen or other means.

[Joe Getty]

The, the whole pardon thing is completely out of control, as we all know, and it's gotten worse and worse, pretty much administration by administration. Something needs to be reined in on that. But the pardoning everybody at the last second while Trump's given the speech. Anyway, there's a little more here from Peter Doocy.

[Peter Doocy]

Just minutes after President Trump got back to the Oval Office, I asked him if this came up during the ride with Biden to the Capitol in the Beast. What are you talking about?

[Joe Getty]

Unification of our country. You know, I didn't know that he gave a pardon to his family because he did it during my speech.

[Peter Doocy]

He didn't tell you the.

[Joe Getty]

No, he didn't tell me. No, no, he did it. They released it during my speech.

[Peter Doocy]

And we're hoping to get details at some point this morning about which Justice Department officials are going to be looking into this, which laws they think might have been broken, and whether or not if these pardons are found to be illegitimate, somehow the Justice Department wants to prosecute some Bidens.

[Joe Getty]

No, I don't think the pardons are going to be illegitimate because the pardoning power is so incredibly broad, which is one of the problems with it. But, yeah, pardoning his family when he specifically, in multiple interviews said he would not do that. And doing it while Trump's giving his speech is weak sauce, man. But you know, what price is he going to pay? And ultimately, given the fact that history is going to remember him as a guy who shouldn't have been president at all, wasn't capable of being president, couldn't have the job was being run by other people. You know, the whole pardon thing is a minor issue compared to that. So not much of a scandal there. But wow, that's incredible. Got Elon Musk in an interview talking about his different businesses and what he's going to be doing now, which I found kind of interesting. A couple other things to finish up with. We will finish strong. Coming up next, Armstrong and Getty looking.

[Michaelangelo]

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[Joe Getty]

Are all of your businesses related in some way? Well, I guess you can think of them as as things that improve the probable trajectory of civilization. So for making life multi planetary or extending life to Mars, the idea there is to ensure the long term survival of life and consciousness as we know it. I'm so excited that Elon is back more or less full time to SpaceX, Tesla, Neuralink, the other things that he runs. I don't know about Twitter, but I think he, I think mankind would be better off. He spent less time on Twitter, but anyway I'm very excited that he's doing that stuff again. So in the modern world where we all do so much online shopping, the ability to return something has become a much bigger deal. I was looking at the statistics. A vast majority of us will only do business with an online retailer if it's got a pretty good return policy. Makes sense to me. Yeah, I'm big on that. I'm returning a pair of shoes, a couple of pairs of shoes right now that I ordered and I like the looks of them online, but when I got them I did not like them. And the return policy is super easy. I'm going to send them back. It's got the return label in the box, slap it on the box, set it outside, off it goes.

[Katie Green]

Love that.

[Joe Getty]

Love that too. The ones that make it more complicated where I gotta like come up with my own box and my own label. I put them in a pile for things that I mean to get to and then when I finally check again, the date has passed and now I own a pair of shoes that don't fit or a pair of pants I hate or whatever that I paid for and that really makes me mad now.

[Katie Green]

You have to drive to Goodwill, Right?

[Joe Getty]

Yeah. And give away something perfectly good that I spent, you know, my own money on.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

But returns are such a big deal. They're now 900 bill billion $900 billion. With the returns last year, 9/10 of a trillion dollars. 17% of all sales by retailers are returned now. So it's just way more common than it used to be for a variety of reasons. Now, 2/3 of shoppers say negative return experience would affect whether they'd go back to that retailer. Yeah, I'm way more likely to use the place that will let you. That has the label in there. And all I got to do is slap it on the box and send it back out than if I got a. They make you jump through hoops or whatever. But listen to this. In a survey of many, many shoppers in the United States, over two thirds say they believe retailers make it easy to abuse flexible return policies. That's an interesting complaint. Or I don't know if it's a complaint. Maybe it's just a fact. But about half admitted to abusing policies in the past year. And I realized I had. I'm a generally very honest person, but I had a pair of shoes I had worn outside. But because it seemed to me that you couldn't tell and I didn't like them, I did return them. So it's technically breaking the rules. Although there's no way they could tell I wore them.

[Katie Green]

You're a terrible person.

[Joe Getty]

How do you sleep at night? That's what I was thinking.

[Katie Green]

I just don't even want to associate with anymore.

[Joe Getty]

So that's the limit of my, you know, sins. I suppose. I'm in pretty good shape, but zero morals. I don't go as far as some of these people. Another 30% said they use the policies to avoid paying full price. I don't know quite what that means. 30% say they use and return expensive wardrobe items that they otherwise couldn't afford. So you order like a shirt or a dress or pants or whatever, you know. In other words, clothes. You order something, you wear it to the party or the date or the graduation, and then you send it back. That ain't cool.

[Katie Green]

I've not done that, had somebody do that at my wedding.

[Joe Getty]

Really?

[Katie Green]

Yeah. The dress that one of the women wore, she was like, I still have the tag on this because I'm only wearing it today. I was like, oh, wow, that's classy, I guess.

[Joe Getty]

Wow.

[Katie Green]

Yeah, yick.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, well, yick. Because somebody else is going to get that. That Was worn for an entire day.

[Katie Green]

He's sweating, doing the Cupid Shuffle. No.

[Joe Getty]

30% say they've done that.

[Katie Green]

That's crazy.

[Joe Getty]

I have not. And. And haven't even considered it. It's half for younger customers. It's for the younger crowd. Half of people are doing that.

[Katie Green]

Wow, Where'd they get that? Is that. Is that something, you know, like, the last generation was doing, like, hey, check this out.

[Joe Getty]

That's a good question. Do we just have lower moral. Why the. Why does the younger crowd have lower morals about that sort of thing? I wonder if it's just they never lived in the retail world.

[Katie Green]

Oh.

[Joe Getty]

Where you walk into a store and you look somebody in the face. Everything's just anonymous. It's a. It's a company. It's not a human being.

[Katie Green]

Right.

[Joe Getty]

I still have kind of the leftover. You talk to somebody at Sears. You don't want to lie to the old lady. You hate to look that old lady. Yeah. You don't want to look grandma in the eye and say, no, I didn't like the way this fit when you wore it to the wedding all day long. Whereas the young crowd, they've never dealt with a human being. So it's just all, yes, Michael.

[Katie Green]

Oh, no.

[Joe Getty]

I'm just sitting here disgusted. So half of the younger people wear the. Get the clothes for one occasion, then send it back. More than half, 58%, said they open up multiple accounts to take advantage of promotions. You know how when you go to buy something, do you have a promo code? If you open up another account, maybe you get the 10% off for the 15. I haven't. I've never gone to that much work.

[Katie Green]

I will tell you, I do this every time I online shop for something. I will go to the search bar, and I will type in the website that I'm on, followed by the words promo code. And I cannot tell you how many times that has worked.

[Joe Getty]

Really?

[Katie Green]

Yeah. Where there's a promo code I don't know about that pops up, click on it, put it, copy, paste, and bam, 10 bucks off or whatever.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, I didn't do that. Just yesterday, I was ordering some clothes somewhere in promo code, and I thought, man, I wish I had one. Yeah, what do you do?

[Katie Green]

Just whatever website let's say we're on, you know, Banana Republic. Banana Republic. Okay. So then you would go up to the search bar. Banana Republic promo code. And there's all these websites that compile lists from different deals, and you can copy and paste from there. And next thing you know, it's a percentage off or whatever.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, well that's not, I don't think that's uncool or a crime or anything like that. They have those promo codes out there.

[Katie Green]

Yeah, it's out there. If you find it, finders keepers, go for it.

[Joe Getty]

It's not like wearing a pair of cool argyle socks and then sending them back. Ew.

[Katie Green]

No.

[Joe Getty]

So here's the. Here, here's the long and short of all of this is that retailers have end up in a situation where they know they're in some cases getting ripped off, losing money. And so they're, they, they, they have a, a desire to want to clamp down on the return policies to make it more difficult. But then they lose the honest people. They're going to lose people like me. I want a really generous return policy because I'm going to be honest, but I want to be able to return it really easily. So they've got a balance between mostly young people who are ripping them off and causing them to lose money because now they get the dress back and they can smell that it was. Whatever. It's got a stain on it.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

You know, they've done the walk of shame in it and you can just tell by looking at it and then, but, but if you tighten up your return rules too much, then you lose a whole bunch of the older customers are spending money. So that's got to be a tough balance. And we all know that like Walmart and Costco, a number of places that had a blanket, you can return anything, any time policy have had to tighten those up because scumbag started abusing them. I don't know who you are. That does that. People were renting TVs at one point, basically.

[Katie Green]

Yeah, I remember that for like super.

[Joe Getty]

Bowl week and stuff like that.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Joe Getty]

Because you got a return policy where you can get the big screen tv, watch the. What to watch the big game or Game of Thrones finale or whatever you're going to do and then return it within 30 days. But don't you realize you ruin it for everybody? You ruin it for yourself. You ruin it for yourself cuz then the return policies don't exist anymore. Final Thoughts. Yes.

[Michaelangelo]

With your hosts, Jack Armstrong and Joe Getty.

[Joe Getty]

I love that so much. That is art.

[Katie Green]

Yeah, that is art. Hey, I couldn't do that.

[Joe Getty]

Here is your host for Final Thought. No, I couldn't. I don't think it could. Here's your host for Final Thoughts, me, Jack Armstrong. Joe is not here. Let's start with our. What do we call you technical director Michelangelo. Your final thought, Michael? Yeah. Katie and I met our spouses at work and so don't use online dating. Ask people out in real life. Bill Belichick met his future wife on an airplane and so can you ask out co workers. Here is Katie Green, our newslet. Katie. Katie, the news lady with her final thought.

[Katie Green]

I can't believe I'm still watching this eagle that hasn't flown yet. Oh, I'm still doing it. I want him to fly. Or she. She stopped puking though, so that's good.

[Joe Getty]

So there's only one eagle left in the nest that hasn't flown?

[Katie Green]

Yeah, just one.

[Joe Getty]

Are mom and dad still around?

[Katie Green]

I haven't seen mom and dad yet.

[Joe Getty]

This morning, but mom is still feeding that one. Or obviously wouldn't be able to get any food.

[Katie Green]

I don't know.

[Joe Getty]

I've heard that the nest is six feet across. You can't tell if you just look at the video. It's hard to get a perspective of how big things are.

[Katie Green]

Yeah, it's huge.

[Joe Getty]

Yeah, I could lay down completely in that nest. That'd be comfy. My final thought, we're going to talk about planks. I might do a plank during the One More Thing podcast. And how long should you be able to do it? A plank at various ages I think will be very helpful. You if information to keep you in shape. Armstrong and Getty wrapping up another grueling four hour workday. If you ever want anything we talked about or a clip or something, you can go to armstrongandgetti.com if you're interested in buying any Armstrong and Getty gear like a sports bra or a jacket or a. Whatever. Underwear. I got both my kids underwear for Christmas because I want them to have my name right there on their buttocks. We'll see you tomorrow. God bless America. Armstrong and Getty. There's something happening that's hard to quantify. It's been a master class. That's. This is garbage. This thing is a farce. It's cold and everyone knows it. Are you sure?

[Michaelangelo]

Oh, dead show.

[Joe Getty]

Yep. Absolutely.

[Tom Holman]

This has to stop.

[Joe Getty]

And it has to stop like the day before yesterday. Let's not act like children. I think there's a form of elder abuse going on here.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's exciting.

[Joe Getty]

She knows. She knows. So long as he was denied. I love you, Joe. On that high note. Thank you all very much. Armstrong and Getty.

[Jack Armstrong]

This is an Iheart podcast.