You've Got To Be Freakin' Kiddin' Me!

Summary

Armstrong & Getty On Demand: "You've Got To Be Freakin' Kiddin' Me!"

Release Date: June 4, 2025
Host: Jack Armstrong
Co-Host/Guest: Michael Getty
Produced by: iHeartPodcasts

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1. Personal Encounters and Boundaries

The episode kicks off with Michael Getty sharing a personal and somewhat humorous anecdote about an uncomfortable encounter during his college years. He recounts a night when, due to a freezing environment, he chose to sleep on the hardwood floor instead of the bed. This decision led to an unexpected and unwelcome advance from a male roommate.

Michael Getty [02:35]: "It's the one time in my adult life when I nearly shared a bed with another man... He grabs my crank."

Jack Armstrong responds empathetically, emphasizing the importance of setting boundaries without confrontation.

Jack Armstrong [03:17]: "That's the right way to handle it. Wordlessly."

Michael elaborates on how the situation was resolved without tension, highlighting mutual understanding and respect.

Michael Getty [04:19]: "We never said anything about it again. That's the way we handled that."

2. Navigating Sexual Mores Through the Decades

The conversation transitions into a broader discussion about changing sexual norms and behaviors over the years. Jack introduces a historical perspective by referencing John Lennon’s interactions during the Beatles era, illustrating how social dynamics and expectations around consent and courtship have evolved.

Jack Armstrong [06:45]: "...he used a very Liverpool accented F word... Would you like to [blank]? And she said, thanks, but not really. I just want to go to sleep."

Michael compares historical anecdotes with modern-day scenarios, reflecting on the persistent nature of certain social behaviors despite shifts in cultural attitudes.

Michael Getty [07:19]: "That's the way it was with George Harrison and Eric Clapton and the girl that is Layla from the Layla song... Clapton talks about it in his book."

3. The Modern Workplace: Political Correctness and Overreach

Shifting gears, Michael brings up a current issue within government circles regarding political correctness. He describes a situation where a woman in a government meeting raised concerns about gendered language, specifically the use of "you guys," and the speaker's dismissive response.

Michael Getty [07:38]: "...a woman raised her hand and tearfully asked the speaker to stop saying 'you guys' because it was gender hurtful."

The discussion highlights the tension between fostering inclusive language and the perception of overreach in professional settings. Jack and Michael debate the effectiveness and sincerity of such initiatives, with Michael expressing skepticism about the government's handling of minor issues versus more significant problems.

Jack Armstrong [08:04]: "Dope."
Michael Getty [08:48]: "...China deserves to take us over if that's what we are."

4. Reflections on Legacy and Responsibility

Towards the latter part of the episode, Jack shares insights from a favorite writer about the responsibilities of leadership, referencing King Charles's land acknowledgments in Canada. This segues into a critique of performative gestures versus meaningful actions in addressing historical injustices.

Jack Armstrong [09:07]: "...you are literally the king of the country. If you wanted to give back that square mile, do it."

Michael concurs, emphasizing the futility of symbolic acts without tangible restitution.

Michael Getty [10:06]: "Sure. Somebody else will have it in a year or a decade or a millennium."

The hosts reflect on the cyclical nature of power dynamics and territorial claims, questioning the effectiveness of current approaches to reconciliation and restitution.

5. Concluding Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, Jack humorously ties the discussion back to contemporary financial platforms, using metaphorical language to underscore the complexities and antiquated systems still in place.

Jack Armstrong [10:20]: "If you want to win over Jack Armstrong, you gotta woo him first."

The episode concludes with a light-hearted nod to outdated investing platforms, reinforcing the theme of navigating old systems in a modern context.

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Notable Quotes

• Michael Getty [02:35]: "It's the one time in my adult life when I nearly shared a bed with another man... He grabs my crank."
• Jack Armstrong [03:17]: "That's the right way to handle it. Wordlessly."
• Jack Armstrong [06:45]: "...he used a very Liverpool accented F word... Would you like to [blank]? And she said, thanks, but not really. I just want to go to sleep."
• Michael Getty [07:38]: "...a woman raised her hand and tearfully asked the speaker to stop saying 'you guys' because it was gender hurtful."
• Jack Armstrong [09:07]: "...you are literally the king of the country. If you wanted to give back that square mile, do it."

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Insights and Conclusions

In "You've Got To Be Freakin' Kiddin' Me!," Armstrong and Getty navigate a blend of personal anecdotes, historical references, and contemporary social issues. They delve into the nuances of personal boundaries, the evolution of sexual norms, and the challenges of political correctness in professional environments. Through candid conversations and relatable stories, the hosts provoke thoughtful reflections on how societal changes impact interpersonal interactions and institutional behaviors. The episode underscores the importance of respect, authenticity, and meaningful action in both personal relationships and broader societal structures.

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For those who haven't tuned in yet, "You've Got To Be Freakin' Kiddin' Me!" offers a blend of humor, insight, and candid discussion that encapsulates the essence of the Armstrong & Getty Show. Whether you're navigating personal boundaries or pondering the complexities of modern social norms, this episode provides a relatable and engaging conversation worth listening to.

Transcript

[Jack Armstrong]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Joe Getty]

You know what's great about your investment account with the big guys? It's actually a time machine. Log in and zoom. Welcome back to 1999. It's time for an upgrade. At public.com you can invest in almost everything. Stocks, bonds, options and more. You could even put your cash to work at an industry leading 4.1% APY. Leave your clunky, outdated platform behind at public.com go to public.com and fund your account in five minutes or less. Paid for by Public Investing, Inc. Member FINRA and SIP.

[Katie Green]

Full [e-mail] disclosures the following heartwarming yet informative scene is brought to you by.

[Trust and Will Narrator]

Trust and Will Son, your grandpa and I used to work on this car together, and when I'm gone, I want you to have it.

[Michael]

Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

Thanks dad.

[Katie Green]

Doesn't count. What you need is a will. Luckily, Trust and Will makes it easy. Designed by attorneys but customized by you, you can easily create a state specific, legally valid document that actually counts. Now let's let the engine do the talking. Am I right? Start your [e-mail] use offer code, count for 20% off and make it count. Trust and Will is an online estate planning service. For detail, see trustandwill.com you've got to.

[Michael]

Be freaking kidding me. It's one more thing.

[Jack Armstrong]

Armstrong and Getty. One more thing.

[Michael]

Before I get to the you got to be freaking kidding me. I have a mole who works in government who regularly texts me things that get said at meetings. It's just unbelievable.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, I'll bet.

[Michael]

But I'll get to that in just a second. I mentioned this on the actual radio show, so I need to follow through the one time in my adult life when I nearly shared a bed with another man. Boy, I really need to set up onto this because it sounds like I'm. We got into the conversation about how women will share a bed in a hotel room. Like when they're on a girls trip, but guys don't. I would sleep in the bathtub with a pillow and, you know, my jacket for a blanket before I would do that. But one time, geez, many years ago I was in college. Thank you, Gladys. And we're in this house, there's like, I don't know, six, eight of us sleeping. Anyway, I'm on the floor in this room, hardwood floor. And it's freezing in there. I mean, it is freezing in there. But I had chosen the floor anyway due to sleeping in the bed at some point. Says like middle of the night. Like, you can sleep up here if you want to because it's so cold. And I thought, yeah, it is so cold. No big deal. I get up in bed, 20 seconds later, he grabs my crank.

[Jack Armstrong]

What?

[Unnamed Male Guest]

Come on.

[Michael]

I'm not. I'm not kidding at all. I'm not.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's what happens, Katie. That's what you cross the man line.

[Michael]

I'm not saying this always happens, but.

[Jack Armstrong]

Did you just call him Jussie Smollett? That is untoward.

[Michael]

I'm not saying this always happens, just usually, but the one time in my adult male life I think that I ever even attempted. Shared a bed with somebody, he did. He made a move.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wow.

[Michael]

Drunken in the middle of the night.

[Unnamed Male Guest]

Okay, well, no wonder. You would never.

[Michael]

I crawled back down to the floor. Never brought it up. Never mentioned it to him. He never mentioned to me. Just never. We never said anything about it again. That's the way we handled that.

[Jack Armstrong]

That's the right way to handle it. Wordlessly.

[Unnamed Male Guest]

God, guys are so weird. I totally. If that. If something like that had happened with me, it would be an absolute. What the f. Was that? The next morning you would.

[Katie Green]

Hell, yeah.

[Michael]

That's interesting also. Huh?

[Unnamed Male Guest]

What was that and why?

[Jack Armstrong]

Because I wanted to have sexual relations with you. Because. Because I was.

[Michael]

She'd say to you. Because I was seeing if you interested. Yeah. In. In some sort of sex With. With me as a dude. Yes, Michael.

[Jack Armstrong]

This was your broke back mountain, Jack.

[Michael]

And I went. It was my brokeback mountain, and I went the other direction.

[Jack Armstrong]

Right.

[Michael]

Like, turns out I could quit him quite quickly. I went back down to the cold.

[Jack Armstrong]

Floor and you got to quit that.

[Michael]

Yeah. I don't know.

[Jack Armstrong]

I don't know.

[Michael]

It worked out fine. It worked out fine. I never said anything. He never said anything. He made an overture, I made a response.

[Unnamed Male Guest]

Didn't work out fine for him.

[Michael]

It was. It was clear that I wasn't interested. And he thought, okay, thought maybe you might be. And that was fine after that.

[Jack Armstrong]

I remember the first time a guy hit on me. It was in a. A bar club. I was a college lad at the time, I think. And my only reaction was, I'm flattered. I'm like, oh, thanks, but, you know, I'm straight.

[Michael]

I was fine. I think I was more.

[Jack Armstrong]

He didn't grab my crank. He just made it clear that, hey, we should, you know, I think, like to get acquainted.

[Michael]

Yeah, I can understand why you'd be flattered, but I think mine was more of a middle of the night drunk, you know, better Better than nothing. Any port in a storm. I think that's what I was very.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, so you weren't worried about the gay part of it, you were just offended?

[Michael]

Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

That he hadn't wooed you.

[Michael]

No flowers. No.

[Jack Armstrong]

There was no courtship whatsoever.

[Unnamed Male Guest]

Didn't take you to dinner.

[Michael]

This is animalistic. Yeah, no, I was the. Better than nothing.

[Jack Armstrong]

Now I get your objection.

[Michael]

I was. It's closing time. Let's look around and see what the options are. That's what I ended up being.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, that's just sad. You were like Arnold and the maid.

[Michael]

Arnold and. Oh, yes. Maybe. Maybe.

[Jack Armstrong]

You know what's interesting? It just popped into my head, sexual mores through the years. And I read John Lennon told a story. Is it yeah or no, no, I'm sorry. It was actually. It was a female music star woman of the same period, like the Beatles era. And. And I don't want to say the name because I don't want to get wrong, but she ended up somehow in a bed with John Lennon. And it was like a long party or whatever. Everybody was going to sleep and then just everybody would find a bed to flop in. And at one point he asked her and he used a very Liverpool accented F word. I don't want to create more word for more work for Hanson. But he said, would you like to blank? And she said, thanks, but not. Not really. I just want to go to sleep. And he said, oh, thank goodness, I've already been blanked tonight. But he just thought it would be ungentlemanly in the late 60s.

[Michael]

Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

Not to offer a coupling.

[Joe Getty]

Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

The swinging 60s. Oh, boy.

[Michael]

Wow. That's something.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, I remember. Similarly, there was a rock journalist who's talking about he had a very attractive wife and he would be at these, you know, big rock and roll star parties, again as the late 60s in Southern California. And he talked about Jim Morrison and other people hitting on his wife and. And wanting to have sex with her. And he felt kind of bad about saying, no, please don't have sex with him because, you know, we're married and everything. Because it was definitely, you know, an okay option.

[Michael]

Yeah, that's what it was. That's the way it was with George Harrison and Eric Clapton and the girl that is Layla from the Layla song, George Harrison's wife. Clapton talks about it in his book. George is like on board. Oh, yeah, that sounds cool. Go ahead. I would love that.

[Katie Green]

Yeah.

[Michael]

What? Yeah, if you had sex with my wife, you would love that.

[Unnamed Male Guest]

That's bizarre to me.

[Jack Armstrong]

Or what's going on still now.

[Michael]

Yeah, that's what I think. Anyway, so my deep mole in government sent this yesterday. I mentioned this one on the show already, that at the start of the meeting, a woman raised her hand and tearfully asked the speaker to stop saying you guys because it was gender hurtful. And so the speaker started saying y' all not to be offended.

[Jack Armstrong]

Dope.

[Unnamed Male Guest]

That's when you just end it right there. End meeting today.

[Jack Armstrong]

You. You're fired. Get out. Wait, what?

[Joe Getty]

Get out.

[Michael]

In government today, the government meeting, somebody raised their hand, said, are you receptive to some feedback on your t. Choice based on its environmental impact? Apparently, the tea being provided for the meeting had microplastics, so they wanted to.

[Jack Armstrong]

Oh, that's so precious.

[Michael]

Isn't that something we receptive to? Feedback on your teacher about the environmental impact of your tea choice. China deserves to take us over if that's what we are.

[Jack Armstrong]

Boy, I can't remember who it was. It was one of my favorite writers pointed out the other day that when King Chuck was in Canada and he was gonna. I think it was. He was addressing the parliament, but he kicked off his. His address with one of those idiotic declarations of. What do you call them?

[Michael]

Land acknowledgments.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, okay. And. And he said, enhance it. I am going to create a little work for you here. He said, first, I'd like to acknowledge that we are standing on the land once controlled by the Wachapoochee tribes and blah, blah, blah, and that we should seek full reconciliation in both word and deed.

[Michael]

Great Britain is doing this.

[Jack Armstrong]

Well, and. And I. I'd love to steal this line, but I won't. I'm paraphrasing, but as the guy pointed out, dude, you're literally the king of the country. If you wanted to give back that square mile, do it. Don't stand up there and say, oh, I would like to acknowledge you could give it back to him.

[Michael]

Well, stroke of a pen, and then. We're not into this sort of thing because, you know, whoever took it last has it, and that's the truth of every. Every square inch on planet Earth. Sure.

[Jack Armstrong]

Somebody else will have it in. In a year or a decade or a millennium.

[Michael]

It's.

[Jack Armstrong]

Wait, it'll happen.

[Michael]

Right. But the England's gonna go around the world doing that, man. They'd have to do that a lot. Sun never sets. Have you ever heard that? That whole thing? Yeah.

[Jack Armstrong]

Yeah, no kidding. Well, if you want to win over Jack Armstrong, you gotta woo him first. Well, I guess that's it. And here we have a specimen from the early 2000s, a legacy investing platform. Please don't touch the exhibit folks. It could crash.

[Joe Getty]

Ready to step out of the Financial history museum? At public.com you can invest in almost everything stocks, bonds, options and more. You can even put your cash to work at an industry leading 4.1% APY. Leave your clunky, outdated platform behind. Go to public.com and fund your account in five minutes or less. Paid for by Public Investing, Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC.

[Katie Green]

Full [e-mail] disclosures the following heartwarming yet informative scene is brought to you by Trust and Will Son.

[Trust and Will Narrator]

Your grandpa and I used to work on this car together, and when I'm gone, I want you to have it.

[Michael]

Wow.

[Jack Armstrong]

Thanks dad.

[Katie Green]

Doesn't count. What you need is a will. Luckily, Trust and Will makes it easy. Designed by attorneys but customized by you, you can easily create a state specific, legally valid document that actually counts. Now let's let the engine do the talking. Am I right? Start your [e-mail] use offer code, count for 20% off and make it count. Trust and Will is an online estate planning service. For details, see trustandwill.com with the American.

[American Express Narrator]

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[Jack Armstrong]

And.

[American Express Narrator]

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[Jack Armstrong]

This is an iHeart podcast.