Mel Robbins: The One Thing That Actually Matters

Summary

Aspire with Emma Grede — Episode Summary

Episode Title

Mel Robbins: The One Thing That Actually Matters
Podcast: Aspire with Emma Grede
Air Date: January 6, 2026
Guest: Mel Robbins
Host: Emma Grede

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Main Theme / Purpose

In this rich and candid conversation, Emma Grede sits down with Mel Robbins—bestselling author, top global podcaster, and businesswoman—to dig into the philosophies, habits, and turning points that have shaped Mel’s extraordinary success. The discussion centers around building an authentic, purpose-driven life and business, the real meaning of success, practical tools for overcoming adversity, and the personal qualities required to thrive, regardless of starting point or age. Mel’s signature directness and vulnerability make the episode a rallying cry for anyone aspiring to a more meaningful, resilient, and impactful life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Power of Mission and Authenticity

• Mel’s “Unbelievable Run”: Emma opens by noting Mel’s meteoric success and inquiring about her “secret sauce.”

  • Mel’s Response: Unwavering work ethic, deep mission clarity, and patience. Mel stresses “doing it in the dark” for years before the world catches up.
    Quote: "When you know what you’re doing and why... nothing but you can make you lose." (04:04)

• Influence of Seth Godin: Mel credits Godin for helping her understand that successful business is built on knowing “what it’s for and who it’s for.”
  Quote: “A successful business makes people feel something.” (06:44)

• Mission Evolves Over Time: Mel shares that her mission has shifted—from survival and paying bills to higher-level impact. Authenticity and a relentless ability to simplify complex ideas have distinguished her.

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2. Handling Success & Staying Grounded

• Integrating Success with Purpose: Mel’s non-negotiable is sticking to her mission: serving “one person somewhere in the world” to help them feel and do better.

  • Success is balanced by continually focusing on the real person’s needs, not metrics or virality.
  • Quote: “I know my mission. My mission is to serve one person... give them the tools and the empowerment to create a better life.” (16:16–17:00)

• Late-Blooming Success: Mel’s career accelerated at 41, after near financial ruin—she credits hardship with keeping her “astonishingly present.”

  • Quote: "When your success comes later in life... you never forget that it matters." (18:30–19:16)

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3. The “Let Them” Theory & Boundaries

• Letting Go of Others’ Opinions: A core insight is the profound freedom—and power—gained from focusing on one’s own behavior and detaching from people’s reactions.
  • Quote: "Until I learned to say let them... I didn't understand how much power and time and energy I had." (24:23)
  • Learning to say “let them” brings peace and presentness, shifting decisions to be value-based.

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4. On Jealousy & Direction

• Jealousy as a Compass: Mel advocates using jealousy as a tool—what you envy signals a “blocked desire” and can illuminate your true wants.
  • Quote: “Jealousy is blocked desire. It is impossible... to be jealous of something you don’t want.” (13:01)

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5. The Reality of Building a Career

• The Grueling Path to Success: Mel details her journey from local radio for $25/hour while $800,000 in debt, to free keynotes and eventual acclaimed speaker.

  • Advice: Do the legwork; work (often for free) to become excellent before earning money.
  • Quote: “Work the 15 jobs, do the thing you want to do for free until you get so sick of doing it for free that you start to resent the people who are asking you to do it for free.” (34:08)

• Knowing Your Value: When unsure what to charge, Mel’s script: “What’s your budget? ... Normally, I’m double.”

  • Along the way, she learned to invest half her speaking fee back into her craft, ensuring world-class delivery.

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6. The Podcast Philosophy & Impact

• Customer-First Approach: The Mel Robbins Podcast is engineered around obsessing over one listener, striving for intimacy and usefulness over trends or chasing celebrity news.

  • Quote: "Our show became a global phenomenon, one person at a time." (65:41)
  • Key Metric: Not downloads or rankings, but feedback: “impact emails” with real stories of transformation from listeners. (53:51)

• Rejection of External Validation: Mel doesn’t look at podcast backend numbers or rankings—the only figures that matter are real stories of customer impact.

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7. Practical Financial & Business Advice

• Facing Financial Hardship: Mel is upfront about spending a decade paying off enormous debts, advocating for facing financial reality head-on, cutting unnecessary expenses, and understanding money flow as core to personal and business success. (49:34–52:28)

• Owning Your Work: In all deals, especially when you have leverage, never sign agreements you’ll regret in success. Mel insists on owning her IP, doing joint ventures (no advances), and maintaining control over her products and time. (77:00)

  • Quote: “Never sign a deal that you will regret in success.”

• Don’t Quit Your Day Job Prematurely: Keeping financial stability supportive of side hustles increases eventual entrepreneurial success rates. (77:00)

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8. New Ventures: Pure Genius Protein

• New Product Launch: Mel discusses her first branded product, “Pure Genius”—a 23g clinical-grade whey protein shot, born from her own struggle to meet daily protein goals and inspired by top experts interviewed on her podcast.

  • Mel’s involvement: Control freak on formulation and branding; built the medical board herself.
  • Quote: “I wanted to get involved because I think this is a solution anybody can use.” (72:27)

• Building for Trust & Utility: Product is designed to be shelf-stable, not chalky, and research-backed.

  • “You can pour it into a margarita...it’s for everybody.”

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9. Inner Work & Mindset Tools

• Mindset Reset: Mel’s daily essentials:
  • Wake up and say, “Today’s gonna be a good day” (even at a funeral, “because I will show up and support people I love.”).
  • Seek out a heart shape each day—training your brain with positive focus (the reticular activating system).
  • Quote: “The way that you see the world and what's possible determines the world you see.” (83:09)

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10. Legacy, Values, and Final Advice

• Legacy: Hopes to be remembered for the “Let Them” Theory and her ability to make people feel good about themselves. (85:49)
• What No Longer Matters: “Other people’s opinions.” (93:12)
• Advice to Women Navigating Uncertainty:
  • Don’t buy into “the collective illusion”—loudest voices don’t represent the majority.
  • Attack worry by focusing on what’s truly important and reducing overwhelm to “the number one thing I need to focus on today.” (90:39–93:12)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote/Highlight | |-----------|--------------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 04:04 | Mel Robbins | "When you know what you're doing and why... nothing but you can make you lose." | | 06:44 | Mel Robbins | "A successful business makes people feel something." | | 13:01 | Mel Robbins | "Jealousy is blocked desire. It is impossible... to be jealous of something you don’t want." | | 16:16 | Mel Robbins | "My mission is to serve one person...give them the tools and the empowerment to create a better life."| | 24:23 | Mel Robbins | "Until I learned to say let them...I didn't understand how much power and time and energy I had." | | 34:08 | Mel Robbins | "Work the 15 jobs, do the thing you want to do for free until you get so sick of doing it for free..."| | 53:51 | Mel Robbins | "We send out an email five days a week... of screenshots from social, reviews, what changed their life."| | 65:41 | Mel Robbins | "Because it means that this show has become a global phenomenon, one person at a time." | | 77:00 | Mel Robbins | "Never sign a deal that you will regret in success...I own everything I do." | | 83:09 | Mel Robbins | "The way that you see the world and what's possible determines the world you see." | | 93:12 | Mel Robbins | "Other people’s opinions." (most important value she has let go of) |

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Mel on Finding Her “Secret Sauce” and Mission-Driven Work: 04:04–09:24
• Let Them Theory & Boundaries: 24:23–26:22
• Advice for Those Starting Later in Life: 20:06–21:42
• Mel’s Business Journey — From $25/hr Radio to Keynote Phenomenon: 28:30–40:11
• The Importance of Obsessing Over One Customer: 53:02–55:53
• Product Launch: Pure Genius: 67:26–72:27
• Daily Mindset Practice & Brain Science: 83:09–85:49
• Rapid Fire Closing & Book Recommendation: 86:57–88:25
• On Modern Business, Control, & Deals: 77:00–79:59

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Tone & Delivery

The episode’s tone is warm, vulnerable, direct, and actionable—mirroring Mel’s style. Emma brings authentic admiration and challenge, making the conversation flow naturally, packed with real stories and immediately useful wisdom. There’s zero fluff and a constant return to practical impact.

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For Listeners Who Haven’t Tuned In

This episode is the ultimate blueprint for anyone feeling behind, discouraged, or unsure whether it’s too late to build a life and business with meaning. Mel Robbins shares her hard-won wisdom with warmth and candor, breaking down both mindset shifts and nitty-gritty, practical advice—spanning personal boundaries, the reality of financial recovery, and how to engineer a customer-first brand. If you want a roadmap for authenticity, resilience, and genuine, scaleable impact, this is required listening.

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Quick Recap

• Focus on who and what it’s for in everything you do
• Use jealousy as a directional tool
• Doing good work often requires years of thankless labor
• “Let Them” — don’t let other people’s opinions steal your power
• Own your intellectual property; don’t underprice your value
• The only metrics that matter are real-life impact and feedback
• Success at any age is possible; your most meaningful chapters might be ahead
• Practical tools for reshaping your mindset and daily experience

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Actionable Takeaway:
Wake up, declare it a good day, and intentionally seek small symbols of positive focus (like heart shapes) to reshape your mindset and experience. And if you wish to build something lasting, obsess over the one person you serve—not the noise or the trends.

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For more:
Find Mel’s podcast, her new “Pure Genius” protein shots, and dig deeper into the “Let Them Theory.”
Follow Emma Grede and “Aspire” for more insightful conversations with world-changing minds.

Transcript

[Emma Grede]

It's a new year and if you want this one to feel any different, then start right here. Mel Robbins knows what it means to start from nothing and make your way to the very top. Mel is the host of one of the top podcasts in the world. Her videos have been viewed over a billion times and her books have sold millions. But none of that came easy. Mel just has a way of saying things that makes it all click. And over the next hour, she's giving you the simple tools to take on the things that have been holding you back. Get comfortable because this will change your entire year. What does it mean to live a brave life as a working woman? It's about showing up, staying grounded and having the physical and mental energy to handle the pace of life. And that is one of the reasons to love Ancient and Brave and their pure, potent, powerful supplements. Ancient and Brave has been an iconic wellness brand in the UK for years and now they've launched in the us. It feels like the perfect moment to talk about the two products you can integrate into your daily routine that change the game. They're True Creatine and True Collagen. Called the Power duo, emerging research explores creatine's role in supporting women's strength, cognitive health and energy. Ancient and Brave's True Creatine plus is the one you need to try. Just load it into your water to support peak performance and vitality. Stack it with their best selling, clinically studied True Collagen. A single ingredient collagen sourced from the EU herds, free from growth hormones and routine antibiotics. This is a daily habit that supports healthy aging post exercise, recovery and skin. They come in gorgeous jars or on the go sachets for wherever you're off to. Ancient and Brave is a certified B corp, a member of 1% for the planet. They offer tools that genuinely support and nourish your brain. Backed by scientists and experts. Right now, Ancient and Brave is giving my listeners an exclusive offer. Head to ancientandbrave.com and use code EMMA for 20% off your first order. That's ancientandbrave.com, code EMMA for 20% off. Give your body a little daily bravery. It adds up.

[Sponsor Announcer]

This episode is brought to you by Macy's. Shop in store or@macy's.com.

[Emma Grede]

Mel Robbins I'm so excited that you're here. I don't even know what to say, but I am so happy that you're here and in this moment of your life because my goodness, have you had the most unbelievable moment of your life? I mean, I don't even feel like I need to do any introduction, but let me just like, gather myself and gather my thoughts. You have one of the single biggest podcasts in the world. You have a book, the Let Them Theory. If any of you haven't heard that, sold over 8 million copies, a New York Times bestseller that's just like stayed on that list in the most unlike believable numbers imaginable. You have launched this unbelievable business that I cannot wait to talk to you about. But I am just so in awe of you right now. I feel like I had this incredible moment with you myself earlier this year, which I still haven't got over because every single day, on the street, in email, wherever I am, somebody talks to me about my Mel Robbins episode. And so I really wanted to ask you, and I feel like we have to start here because there's so much noise out there. Your space, or the space that you inhabit and quite rightly lead, is so full of competition and so full of noise. And I want to understand what it is that you think or why it is that you think you've had such incredible cut through and why you're on this unbelievable run that you're on right now.

[Mel Robbins]

Do you want to talk about the podcast? Do you want to talk about the book, or what do you want to talk about?

[Emma Grede]

I just want Mel Robbins, the whole, the brand, the theme, the person. Why do you think it is that you're having this unbelievable run now?

[Mel Robbins]

There are so many reasons why, and part of it is just an extraordinary work ethic. Part of it is a laser, unwavering focus on what I am wanting to accomplish in terms of the impact that I wanna make and who I'm serving and what it's for. Whether it's the podcast or a book that I'm writing or anything else. Like, I have a crystal clear mission and intention behind everything that I do. It doesn't matter what other people are doing. It doesn't matter what the noise is. When you know what you're doing and why, when you know who you're serving and why, when you know the difference you want to make in people's lives and why, when you know the problems you're trying to solve, nothing but you can make you lose. And so for me, what you're seeing now is the culmination of 16 years of grueling, boring, annoying, painful work to get to a point where all of a sudden the world has caught up with what I've always been doing. I think especially in business, you have to do it in the dark, you have to do it alone. You have to have those moments where you're gonna quit. And you have to find within you the ability to just keep showing up when nobody's paying attention, when everybody else is getting the press or they're getting the investment or they're getting. They're part of the noise. Every time that you feel like you're on the outside of some big party you can't get into, you have to just keep showing up. And so I think it's part work ethic, it is part clarity and a laser tie to my mission. And it is also timing. It is very clear to me that this did not happen earlier in my life because I wasn't ready for it. And it's also clear to me that this didn't happen earlier in my life because the timing wasn't right.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

And so those three things, the timing, the work ethic and patience that's required for work ethic and maintaining a laser focus on what it is that you want to be doing. And it comes down to kind of two questions. So I am a huge student of Seth Godin. He was the person that originally taught me the art of one to one marketing.

[Emma Grede]

Will you explain who Seth is?

[Mel Robbins]

Seth Godin is the OG of what's called permission marketing. And the idea that when you have a business, you're not in a business to sell products. You are in a business to do something with people. That's what businesses are. People forget that a business is not about the spreadsheet and the product and all that stuff. A successful business makes people feel something. And most people that start a business don't even know who they're serving and what it's for. And if you can't answer the question, what is it for? And who's it for? Why am I doing this? You will never be successful in business. So Seth Coden has probably written, I don't know, 12, 16, 20 New York Times bestselling books. He was writing about one to one marketing, email marketing, permission marketing, the fact that the single best vote for your product or your service or you is when a person not only gives you their time, but the real endorsement is when they recommend it to somebody else.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, yes.

[Mel Robbins]

And so understanding that your business grows not because of some marketing stunt, not because of something that is a flash in the pan, it grows because you have something that makes people feel something.

[Emma Grede]

And that's what you have. Right, Mel? Because when I think about, and I'm really happy that you mentioned A like, hard work, and we're going to talk a lot about that. You know, when I think about you, it's so clear to me that there is a secret sauce and there is this, you know, amalgamation of, like, what has happened in the culture and what has happened in, like, the. The timing of your life and your work and the culmination of all that. Do you ever think about the fact that you have a secret sauce?

[Mel Robbins]

Yes.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

Like, I think that I. Mission driven is really important. And look, the mission has changed over time. There have been times in my life where the mission was, pay my damn bills and not lose the house. And I would say yes to everything that could bring money in. And there will be times in your life, whether you are launching a business or you have a business or you dream of having a business, where the number one objective is make money, and you will say yes to deals that you hate. You'll have to do jobs that you hate. You'll be like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And so my mission then, safety, security, that's what drove me.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

And your mission will change over time. But I think my secret sauce is I have this knack to take wildly complex things and distill it into something simple. I also have a knack for not caring if people make fun of what I'm doing.

[Emma Grede]

Ooh, really? You do?

[Mel Robbins]

Oh, of course.

[Emma Grede]

You have that type of resilience.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes.

[Emma Grede]

You've learned it. Or do you feel like that's just part of Mel Robbins? That's who you are?

[Mel Robbins]

I think that caring about living a better life and being a better person has been such a part of my DNA that if somebody rolls their eyes at the type of things that I talk about or the advice that I share or the experts that I inter. Oh, the self. Oh, personal development. I literally feel sad for people who don't understand the power of taking your life seriously and taking your time and your energy seriously and really looking at, what are you going to do with the very limited time that you have on this planet? And you said this when you were on the Mel Robbins podcast. If you're not using your time to make yourself and the world a better place, what the hell are we all doing?

[Emma Grede]

What are we doing?

[Mel Robbins]

What are we doing here?

[Emma Grede]

What are we doing?

[Mel Robbins]

And so, to me, I have always been the kind of person that cared about other people. I've always been the kind of person that's been intellectually curious. I've always been the kind of. Even when I was Suffering that wanted to feel better. I choose to believe that every human being wants to thrive.

[Emma Grede]

Ah, yes, they do. And they want to.

[Mel Robbins]

Their families. And there are very real problems and very real, like, just injustice that happens in this world, things that are so unfair and.

[Emma Grede]

And.

[Mel Robbins]

And. And you have. And I have. And the people that you care about have the power within them through their thinking and their actions, to change anything for the better over time.

[Emma Grede]

Did you imagine that you would be this successful, and are you comfortable with it?

[Mel Robbins]

I always wanted to be this success.

[Emma Grede]

You did?

[Sponsor Announcer]

Oh, yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

If I'm being honest, I would look at the, you know, the Forbes lists, or I'd look at, you know, somebody who. One of my heroes, Oprah Winfrey. Another hero, Howard Stern. If you look at the people I Love, I love Mr. Well, Mr. Rogers.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

Delilah. Delilah. People roll their eyes at. She is the single most successful radio broadcaster in history. She would appear on Sunday nights, and she'd have this show where people would call and be like, so my boyfriend's been deployed, and I really miss him, and I'm scared. And, you know, and you can feel how nervous this person is. And Delilah just, through her velvety voice, wraps her arms around this person and comforts her with her voice and tells her it's gonna be okay. And then she plays Wind Beneath My Wings for her. And I would listen to that as. And I would go, oh, my gosh. I just hope that I can be the kind of person that could make somebody feel that way. I hope that I can do good in the world. I've always known that. But I didn't know what that meant. I didn't know what that looked like. I didn't know how that could be a business. I just knew in my heart, and I think this is really important, that we have within us a very unique intelligence that is woven into your DNA and your soul when you are born. It is like a directional signal that is there all the time. And if you can tune out the noise around you and if you can stop constantly obsessing over what other people are doing, you will notice that you get signals all day long that are either pulling you towards something in a positive way. The Delilah example is an example of that. Like, oh, my gosh. I just. I love Mr. Rogers. I love Howard Stern. He's so himself. He's hilarious. Like, this is how I talk with my friend. I love Oprah Winfrey. I love the conversation. You feel pulled towards something. You only feel that because it's meant for you, and you can Also feel this negative pull. See, jealousy is also something that informs me. If I notice that I'm jealous of somebody, I'm like, Mel Robbins, pay attention. If I'm annoyed and jealous of what somebody else has, ooh, you better pay attention, Mel. Because jealousy is blocked desire. It is impossible, Emma, to be jealous of something you don't want.

[Emma Grede]

Impossible.

[Mel Robbins]

Impossible. Like I could see the most beautiful penthouse on the planet. No.

[Emma Grede]

Interesting.

[Mel Robbins]

I don't care. Like in la. I don't wanna live in LA like everybody, anybody wants to live here. Fantastic. I don't want that. I don't feel anything. Cause it's not meant for me. And most of us don't understand that when you're jealous. I walked into your building today, the building here is incredible. And I felt that tinge of like, oh, I want this. Pay attention. Because Emma's leading the way. Emma is revealing in me something that is meant for me. There's something about your space and your building and the ambition of that. And also the fact that it's smart in terms of an investment.

[Emma Grede]

That too.

[Mel Robbins]

But really I didn't understand that I would see other people when I was really struggling. And I didn't. I mean, Emma, I've had probably 23 different jobs.

[Emma Grede]

I know. I've been going through the research and I was like, damn, she has done a lot of stuff. It was really surprising to me, Mel. But why? Well, this is. Well, first of all, because my understanding of you is. And you talk about mission and purpose. Like, I feel like I know exactly who you are and you've spoken a lot. So first of all, the first word that comes to me is integrity. You have a lot of integrity. And I think that comes from the fact that you're really real. There's this seeming like, I am who I am. All of your information is often based on, like, science. But then it's coupled with a lot of feeling like she's crying on the episodes. You hold your a lot like I do. Like, I look at you and I'm like, I can trust what she says. She's not a full of shit person. And you've said so much that you. You trace, you know, this idea of integrity and impact over virality. But what I want to ask you is, as you get to this level of success where everything is like, bomb, bomb, bomb, Like a million brilliant dollar idea, how do you make sure that the business and the purpose is evenly weighted or weighted correctly for you and your brand?

[Mel Robbins]

It's easy.

[Emma Grede]

Tell me.

[Mel Robbins]

You focus on who it's for and what it's for. See, the second you take your eye off the ball and you start to look up here, you actually take your eye off the thing that made you successful in the first place. Everybody makes the mistake of measuring the wrong data. What happens in business is there's so much to look at, and this is true about life. Think about it in your relationship. Think about your marriage. Think about the problem person you're dating. There are ways that you showed up and there was an intention that you had when that relationship began and you knew the heart of the person that you were falling in love with.

[Emma Grede]

Yes.

[Mel Robbins]

And then life gets busy and you take your attention off what's right in front of you, and then you start to take it for granted and you start to value other things and you forget the thing that was important in the beginning. The reason why it is simple for me to balance the scale and the success of this with my mission is because I know my mission. My mission is to serve one person somewhere around the world in a way that helps them feel better and gives them the tools and the empowerment to create a better life. I know that the person that reads my books or follows me on social or who is tuning in is somebody who is just waking up today. They're not looking to be a billionaire. They're not looking to win the Nobel Peace Prize. They are a human being that has goals and dreams, and they want to feel a little better, and they want their family to feel a little better and they want to do a little better. And they have no time and they are overwhelmed and they are scared of what's happening in the world, and they feel a lack of control and they feel discouraged. But deep down, they know there's a bigger possibility. They know that life could feel a little better. They know that there are ways to spend their time so that they feel good about what they're doing and who they're surrounded by. They don't know where to start. That's the person I'm talking to. I'm talking to the nurse, to the teacher, to the person that is waiting tables. I'm talking to the grandma that is taking care of their kids while mom and dad are working. I'm talking to the high schooler and to the college student who is scared to change their major or doesn't know how to take that risk and doesn't feel this sense of being encouraged. Because I'm talking to everybody. Because we all want this.

[Emma Grede]

We all want it.

[Mel Robbins]

We all do.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, 100%. We all want it?

[Mel Robbins]

Yes.

[Emma Grede]

So there's no sense of when you are creating a new project or going out and doing something new. Like do you feel the pressure of it having to be really big? Like, is there any of that?

[Mel Robbins]

Zero. Zero.

[Emma Grede]

Does it matter to you?

[Mel Robbins]

No. Well, it matters to me to the extent that first of all, I'm 57 years old. And so one of the reasons why it is super simple to stay clear on my mission is that when your success comes later in life.

[Emma Grede]

Oh yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

When you at the age of 41, almost lose any. Everything that matters to you. I mean, we had liens on the house. We were $800,000 in debt. I'm not going to go into the story because I think it's important to unpack the lessons from it. When you have a moment, a reckoning where you almost lose everything that matters. And let's be honest about what matters. What matters, based on the research and common sense is your relationships and your health. That's it.

[Emma Grede]

End off. That's it.

[Mel Robbins]

That's it.

[Emma Grede]

And you know this.

[Mel Robbins]

That's it. Everybody knows this. One of the most motivating things in the world is going to a funeral because it makes you wake up and go, oh my God, like it's gonna be over like this. And at the end of the road, the only thing you're going to care about. And I'm gonna tell you something, 57 years went by like that. Boom.

[Emma Grede]

Gone in a flash, in a flash.

[Mel Robbins]

And it is going to go by like that.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah. Well, Mel, I love that you mentioned your age because to me you're like living proof that it's never too late to have a really big meaningful chapter in your life. And you are just living proof of that to me right now. But I wonder what you would say to people that are thinking about a new chapter for themselves. Cause it's so important. And I feel like, you know, I'm definitely middle aged at 43 now. And you start to think about things in a really different way.

[Mel Robbins]

Right.

[Emma Grede]

So what do you say to people that are feeling, you know, perhaps a little disillusioned, perhaps a little flat, like they're not making the most of every moment.

[Mel Robbins]

I don't think you can make the most of every moment.

[Emma Grede]

Go on, tell us.

[Mel Robbins]

Okay, well, you can't. I mean, you're not a robot. But if you don't have something or a vision for what you're working toward, then you will fall into this sense that nothing really matters. It's the same old, same old. You're just kind of passing time. And what I would say to anybody, I don't care if you're 18, if you're 88 years old, some of the best days of your life are ahead of you. Some of your most favorite people you haven't even met yet. One of the coolest things about the human experience is you can change your life, your body, the settings in your mind, anytime you decide to.

[Emma Grede]

And you really believe that because you often hear people say. People say, oh, you know, they're stuck in their ways. They'll never change. She's 65. She's never going to change.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, she will change if she decides to change for herself. And so the only thing you need in order to change your life is you need to wake up one day and say, how this feels doesn't work for me anymore. That's all you need.

[Emma Grede]

I want to change my life.

[Mel Robbins]

That's it. Like, how my marriage feels doesn't work anymore. How my bank account feels doesn't work for me anymore. How my friend circle feels doesn't work anymore. I want to feel better. That's all you need is the realization that how you've been doing life no longer works for where you are now.

[Emma Grede]

And do you think about time really differently now? You're 57 to. Let's take like this because you had such a big moment in your early 40s. Like, are you literally thinking about the time you have differently?

[Mel Robbins]

I don't think so because I'm so present. See, one of the things that really has shaped me is that when you almost lose everything that matters, your marriage, your home, family gets torn apart, your health, your like, all of it, all of it. Right on the fundamentals. You never forget that it matters. And so once I was able to pay off our debt, once I was able to pay the bills, once I started cooking and building a business, I didn't lose sight, and I haven't lost sight, and I will never lose sight. That what matters is my husband, my children, my friends, my health, my family.

[Emma Grede]

I mean, that's your big thing, right? That's it. You're so present.

[Mel Robbins]

I am.

[Emma Grede]

That is palpable. When you meet you and spend time with you, you are in that moment not looking over anyone's shoulder. I had this amazing moment with you in Boston where we had dinner, maybe interrupted 25 times by various people. One wanted to say hi to me and then the rest wanted to all come and speak to you. But you give to that person in the moment and then you're like Zoosh. And you're very locked into people. You're like, I want to know everything about you in this moment. It's such a attractive skill when someone can do that to you.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, I believe life is the greatest school you'll ever attend, and you can learn anything from anyone around you.

[Emma Grede]

So what's it like being famous at this point in your life?

[Mel Robbins]

I don't like that part.

[Emma Grede]

Do you not?

[Mel Robbins]

Well, I live in a tiny town in the middle of Vermont. I'm a normal person who happens to.

[Emma Grede]

Have 4 million followers and the million.

[Mel Robbins]

Platforms and the biggest podcast on the planet. I don't feel like I've changed because I know it's important to me. On the weekends, I cook dinner and I hike and I. All I want. The only thing I want more of is time. Time with my husband, time with my family, time to do interesting projects. That's it. That's it. And so much of this, I would say, is also because of the let them theory. And I mean it. And the reason why is I didn't understand, Emma, the extent to which I was preoccupied in making decisions, navigating day to day based on other people's dramas, other people's expectations, other people's moods, what other people might think, what other people, you know, were gonna do, blahbity, blahbity, blah. Until I learned to say, let them. And I started putting a boundary between me and other people and me and the world and me and all of the just insane ways that the world can drain your time and drain your energy. Until I stopped giving power to other people. I didn't understand how much power and time and energy I had. And I also didn't realize, Emma, how often I was up in my head obsessing about either what had just happened or what was gonna happen or, you know, beating myself up.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

And there's something about learning to just say, let them, and teaching yourself that if you can't control what's happening out there, if you can't control another person's mood or what they're gonna think, why on earth would you waste your most precious time and energy worrying about it, obsessing about it?

[Emma Grede]

Why would you?

[Mel Robbins]

Why would you? Well, I'll tell you why. I did. For 54 years. I didn't know how the fuck not to. That's why. And so having this tool that has helped me, like a ninja, just slicing through the day, when I notice myself getting stressed, when I notice somebody's mood tweaking me out a little bit, when I notice Myself, like obsessing about something that's just not. I just say, let them. And it's a way to bring the power and the peace back here. It has made me so present. It has helped me really understand that true power in your life comes from making decisions based on the kind of person you want to be. Making decisions based on your values, making decisions with the best of intention, being quick to clean things up. If you can lay your head on the pillow at night and you know that you did the best that you could, game over. You made decisions that you can stand by because of the information you had at the time. You will have something wild happen. You will be so proud of yourself. You will know yourself.

[Emma Grede]

My friends and I recently took a trip and we booked an incredible place through Airbnb. What made it truly special wasn't just the space. It was the little touches from the host, like the way the neighborhood felt like a community and the connection we made, from discovering a hidden little cafe to chatting with neighbors we never would have met otherwise. Trips like that remind us how travel can really open up a person's world. And while we were away, it sparked a thought. People who travel often really should host their homes through Airbnb. Instead of it sitting empty, it could give someone else that same meaningful experience while also earning some extra income. Imagine putting that money towards your next adventure or. Or a home project. Whatever else you've been planning, whether traveling or at home, hosting through Airbnb is a beautiful way to share space and connection. It could be your next side hustle. A home might be worth more than someone thinks. Find out how [e-mail] host. So incredible, this book that you've. Because it has become, I mean, as you fully intended, a tool for so many people. But I want to switch gears a second and talk to you a bit about the podcast, because the podcast for me is such a seminal, incredible piece of work. Like every. I feel like every day something comes up about the Mel Robbins podcast, about an episode. I spoke to a woman yesterday and she said to me, oh, my goodness, you know, I have a very tricky relationship with my mom. My sister and I are about to spend the weekend with my mom. I just sent her this podcast and I said, oh, but wait a minute, there's that male one, but there's this other one that I sent to my sisters when we're about to see my mom. You know, it's like, it is beyond useful, but you operate at the, you know, this unbelievable level. Having one of the biggest shows in the world?

[Mel Robbins]

Yes.

[Emma Grede]

Is there something to learn from the male podcasters and the male creators? Is there something more specifically for women to learn?

[Mel Robbins]

Well, I think there's something to learn from anybody in the ecosystem you want to compete in. So let's start breaking down some of the advice for somebody.

[Emma Grede]

Somebody get a pen.

[Mel Robbins]

For somebody who is thinking about launching a business or wanting to launch a business or wanting to level up what you're doing. So to go back to, how do you figure out what you need to walk toward? Jealousy is a great tool.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

You will burn yourself alive with jealousy if you don't understand the nature of it. Anybody that you're jealous of, whether you're jealous of their kitchen, or you're jealous of their marriage, or you're jealous of their podcast, or you're jealous of their new makeup line, or you're jealous of whatever it that may follow the jealousy, because no other person can take the things that are meant for you if you can remove the emotion and channel it in the right direction. Jealousy is a directional tool that is trying to get your attention to say, hey, hey, hey. Move toward this. Move toward this. And so when you recognize that people that you're slightly jealous of are your greatest teachers because they're leading you towards something that's meant for you, because jealousy's personal. And so I'm gonna take you all the way to the origin of the podcast. I got my start in the podcast business in 2008. Well, not because I did a podcast, because I had a Saturday morning local radio show in Boston where I was being paid $25 an hour, and I needed the money. We were 800 grand in debt. That radio show was a lifeline. My core value was security and safety. I took every job I could possibly find so I could pay those bills and put groceries on the table. And when I took that call on radio show job, I fell in love with talking to people. And here's the thing I learned from that job. Because everything you've ever done is leading you somewhere. And every job, every experience, every failure, every relationship is teaching you something if you're willing to look for it. And that job in 2008 taught me, number one, that the secret to radio is understanding the magic is one to one. And the intimacy of it. People take you in their cars, they play you in their homes. If they listen to talk radio, they are listening to you as if it's a conversation. It's never everybody out there. It's the one person here. The second thing that it taught me is the absolute magic of ad supported content. Now I wasn't thinking like this then I was like, I need money for groceries tonight I'm gonna host that radio show. Here we go.

[Emma Grede]

Whatever I can get.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. But then wait a minute. The local dentist shout out Dr. Ronkin who was advertising on the thing. If I read his ads, he'd pay for my kids braces. And so I understood the beautiful relationship between the advertisers that show up to support a show so that the show can become free. And that was the beginning of my love of audio. I went on to get an audition for a Sunday night radio show in Atlanta that paid a little bit more money. So then I had two radio shows. Then I got an audition for the five day a week show in Orlando. And I was like the midday, I would say sanity reset between a lot of very conservative talk folks. I was like the person that was not doing conspiracy theory stuff. I was just talking about breaking news, I was taking calls and then all of a sudden Trayvon Martin was murdered. I'm a criminal defense attorney. I was so horrified by what had happened. Stand your ground is the most unconstitutional racist law that has ever been passed. And I started covering that case every day on that radio. And the trial it went to trial, they asked me if I would sit in the courtroom because they were the pool feed. Now Mark, I can't remember what year this was, but this was still. When I have $800,000 liens on the house, I'm not looking to do anything. I'm using my five second rule, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, to keep pushing forward and pushing forward and pushing forward. And I sit in that courtroom every day. What a travesty of justice that case was. And at the end of that case I was awarded the Gracie Award for outstanding news talk show host of the year. And CNN called and offered me a job. And it's like brick by brick by brick by brick. Then I leave radio because I'm on television and I do that for four years and meanwhile keynote speaking is taking off. And so I'm still working three or four jobs. Like I'm, you know, and any, like.

[Emma Grede]

When do you, when's the money start coming? When do you start getting into a place where you're like, oh, that's a nice fee for this like speech I'm about to do.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, the first time I ever got paid it was 2013 and I.

[Emma Grede]

It's not that long ago.

[Mel Robbins]

Yeah, no shit. And so it was 2013 and we still have liens. My husband's left the restaurant, but like he's a shell of himself and I have a full time job at CNN and I'm starting to get asked to do keynote addresses on the side.

[Emma Grede]

Okay, so you're starting to get recognized for your talent. You're starting for people to understand.

[Mel Robbins]

Sort of.

[Emma Grede]

She's.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Yeah.

[Emma Grede]

She got something to talk about?

[Mel Robbins]

Yeah, she's got this 5 second thing that she does. She's got a TEDx talk that has a million views. Let's get her to the thing. Okay, so for a year I gave seven talks for free at conferences. You did women's conferences.

[Emma Grede]

Okay, so you did the legwork.

[Mel Robbins]

Uh huh.

[Emma Grede]

Oh yeah. And then someone says they're gonna pay you.

[Mel Robbins]

Oh no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Emma Grede]

I'm like, get me to the money.

[Mel Robbins]

No. Cause this is advice for you. You have to do it for free.

[Emma Grede]

You gotta get in there.

[Mel Robbins]

You have to get in there. You gotta do the legwork, you gotta do whatever it takes. Work the 15 jobs, do the thing you want to do for free until you get so sick of doing it for free that you start to resent the people who are asking you to do it for free. And so what happened to me is 2013, I give a talk, I'm at the end of the hallway, I'm hoping people will walk all the way down from the main session. I got 100 chairs, whatever. I do a great job. And you do a great job at what you're doing right now.

[Emma Grede]

Don't you think you've given very unpopular advice right now?

[Mel Robbins]

People don't like, I don't care.

[Emma Grede]

People don't like working for free. I worked for free for so long, Mel. I lived in a fashion cupboard at every PR agency in the whole of London for a very, very long time.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, if you don't want, you don't want it.

[Emma Grede]

And is that the advice you give now? You would tell people, do some stuff for free?

[Mel Robbins]

Absolutely. If you have an interest in doing something and you have no experience in it, do it for free. Experiment, see if you actually even like it. I thought I wanted to own a bakery. I really did. Until I got a job working in a bakery and I Woke up at 4:30 and I was making carrot muffins and filling up the sugar and wiping up. No, what I realized is, whoa. I don't want to smell like carrot muffins and have these hours and I want to be the person in the bakery that has a little bit of time to be able to have a Meeting. And I want the community that comes. See, everything is teaching.

[Emma Grede]

Everything is teaching you a little something. You're taking snitches.

[Mel Robbins]

Somebody came up to me.

[Emma Grede]

Take me back to the corridor because I want to know this.

[Mel Robbins]

Somebody comes up to me after the speech and says, oh, my gosh, you were great. Can I ask you a question? I spoke in the morning and I just had a question, speaker to speaker. I said, yeah. She goes, did you get your check yet? I said, check. And there was this really awkward pause and I said, you got paid for this. And she said, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I just assumed you and people get paid for this. And it was this huge wake up call. And this is something I want you to hear. Like, you look at people that are doing the thing you want to do, and you assume that it's only people like that that get paid for this. And you have to take responsibility at some point for understanding that nobody is going to actually pay you what you're worth unless you start asking for it. And I didn't know what to charge. I messed. So here's another takeaway. If you don't know what to charge, this is what you're gonna do. I was like, well, I don't know what to charge. I'm not a celebrity. I don't have a book. I don't like. You know, what am I doing? And if people actually knew my bank account and knew the state of my life, I wouldn't be hired to do anything. And plus, when you're that in debt, you don't feel worthy of money.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

And I didn't. I just knew I needed it.

[Emma Grede]

But that feeling hasn't stayed with you, surely.

[Mel Robbins]

Oh, no, I know my value now. And so here's what you're gonna do. Here's the best hack on the planet. I didn't know what to charge. If you don't know what to charge for your service or for the thing that you're gonna do, here's what you're gonna say. The next time you're talking to somebody about it, you're gonna just pause and say, what's your budget? And then wait. And then say, normally, I'm double. So two weeks later, the phone rings, Emma. And a guy calls. He's seen the thing going viral on Facebook. He wants to hire me for some big speech in August in Dallas. And I said, what's your budget? He said, $10,000. I dropped the phone. That was three months of my mortgage. That was so much money.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

I couldn't believe it. I forgot the second part.

[Emma Grede]

You forgot the double it jit.

[Mel Robbins]

So I felt so unworthy of the money. And here's another piece that you need to take. Preparation is everything. There are moments in your life that are the at bat moment where you are called from the bench and you step up to the plate of life, you better be ready. And they come around only so often. And I felt so unworthy of that money that I spent half of it. Even though I am still $800,000 in debt, I took half of that money that I needed and I hired a graphic designer to help me make a presentation that would look extremely.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, you did.

[Mel Robbins]

But here's what that meant. I had to prepare. I had to prepare. And when I stepped on that stage, it was the performance of a lifetime. And the guy that booked me came up to me and said, I've been in this business booking speakers for 20 years. You are the single best female speaker I have ever seen in my entire life.

[Emma Grede]

I think it's speaking.

[Mel Robbins]

And you are top speaker two of all time. Who runs your business? I said, you do. And he does to this day.

[Emma Grede]

No way.

[Mel Robbins]

That next year. Yeah, that next year we booked 47 speeches. The next year it was 99. And then I was the most booked female speaker in the world. And I was like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And here's another takeaway I want to give you to be. You use the word excellent. Being good at something is the price of entry. Anybody can be good in the restaurant business. Anybody can be good as an influencer. Anybody can be good in the podcasting space. Anybody can be good on stage or a good editor. Like, as far as I'm concerned, you don't have business charging for your services if you're not good. Okay? To be exceptional, to be the one of one, to be in a category of your own, you have to understand the ecosystem that you're in. You have to understand the role that you play. You have to understand that business is not about the thing, it's about the way people feel because businesses are people. You have to understand the tiny details that a lot of people think are beneath them. And it's the details that most people think are beneath them that actually make you untouchable.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, yes.

[Mel Robbins]

And so what I started to realize, because everybody thinks, oh, the job of a motivational speaker, you go to a big event with JP Morgan, you go to big event with 10,000 people, that the job is to get a standing. That's not the Job. Like, if you can't be good on the stage, you have no business being on the stage. The job is to make the people working at the event love working with you. Your job is to make their life easier. Your job is to leave that audience feeling something so that they talk about it. Your job is about how you treat the people. Not the ones that are in the executive suite that don't even realize that you've been hired. At least back then they didn't. It's how you treat the production team. It's how you treat the event planner. Because the CEO is not the one that's going to recommend you. And see, this is. Everybody chases every day we have here.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah, you're excited about it, actually.

[Mel Robbins]

Here, your network, you talked about this. They're right in front of you. They're in a planner that is exhausted, that is terrified that your plane's gonna be delayed, that is worried that you're gonna be a diva. That is worried that you're gonna go over time. That is, you know, like, having anxiety attacks. Cause everything about the event is falling on their shoulders, and they're probably treated like garbage. And they're. If you can make them exhale, if you can make them feel like a superstar. And so here are some of the little things I did as I would be landing in Omaha and catching a cab. Because back in the day, you know, I was not.

[Emma Grede]

No one was sending cars.

[Mel Robbins]

Oh, God, no, no. I was a nobody. I was this, like, up and coming speaker that everybody said was great. I would text the person who was like, two rungs down who's, like, part of the event team. Hey, I made it with a selfie. Oh, my God. Thank you for letting me know in the morning. I'm texting. I'm coming over. I'm gonna stop by Starbucks. Can I pick you? You want? Yeah. No, I'm serious. Give me the order. I'll get it.

[Emma Grede]

No, you dare.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes, I did.

[Emma Grede]

Wow.

[Mel Robbins]

And then I would show up, and then.

[Emma Grede]

You're real good. You really are excellent.

[Mel Robbins]

People would literally say, you know, okay, so how do I be like, guys, it's your show. You tell me. You tell me. Do you need it in keynote? Do you need it in PowerPoint? Oh, I don't care. What's up on the slide? It's your show. You're calling it. You're the expert. I'm just. I've got my slot. I'll do my slot. I'll take care of my slot.

[Emma Grede]

I love that about you. Because, I mean, it says so much about your personality. And I also love the idea that you talk about really understanding your space, understanding the ecosystem. When I think about business, I call it obsessing the competition. I know everything about my competition. Do you still think about the competition when you're in this spot of being the number one? Pretty much all the time. Do you think about the Joe Rogans and the. You don't? No, not at all. What do you think of the manosphere?

[Mel Robbins]

I think it's very interesting that the majority of podcast listeners are women and that those are the shows that are at the top.

[Emma Grede]

Does it annoy you? Because I find it kind of maddening.

[Mel Robbins]

I don't. Because I understand the research of how the discourse in the United States has changed in the last four years due to the intentional infiltration of disinformation. And I also understand that one out of every four pieces of information online that you interact with is a bot. And that coming out of the pandemic, the level of anxiety and uncertainty research shows makes you completely prone to believe conspiracy theories. And so I see what's happening. I see the collective illusion, I see the danger of it. I don't think about it a lot in terms of as it relates to me, because I feel like if there's ever a moment in history or in the world where there's a lot of darkness and fear, fear and uncertainty and the kind of othering of people, that there is always a corresponding rise of light and consciousness and goodness. And I am part of that force for good.

[Emma Grede]

Yes, you are.

[Mel Robbins]

I'm not alone in that. There are so many amazing voices. There are so many amazing people around the world. And one of the reasons why the Mel Robbins podcast has become the global phenomenon that it is is because people are innately good and they want to do well and they are turning toward a show and making time, time that they don't have to listen to something that makes them feel better and that reminds them of what you know to be true.

[Emma Grede]

I think you're part of the correction, Mel.

[Mel Robbins]

I really do.

[Emma Grede]

I feel a great responsibility and you're doing a great job of it. But I think the pendulum has swung, that there has to be a correction. And I really think that so much about what you do. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. If you were to ask me what is the one thing that has helped me level up my life over the last decade, it's consistent therapy. Now, let's be fair. The new year often comes with this idea that everything needs to change. Persistence. Sometimes what's really needed is simply a less burdened version of the same. You therapy can help make that possible by offering an unbiased perspective, helping you better understand what might be weighing you down, and clarifying the motivations, emotions or relationships that might be holding you back. BetterHelp makes the process so straightforward. Their therapists are fully licensed in the US and follow a strict code of conduct so you can feel confident in the support you're receiving. To get started, you complete a short questionnaire outlining your needs and preferences. And with more than 12 years of experience and an industry leading match fulfillment rate, BetterHelp typically gets the therapist match right the first time and if the fit isn't right, then you can switch at any time. With over 30,000 therapists and millions of sessions completed, the platform continues to earn really strong reviews. BetterHelp makes it easy to get matched online with a qualified therapist. Sign up and get 10% [e-mail] aspire that's betterhelp.com aspire these days it's easy to feel drained, stressed and out of balance, but that's where Symbiotica comes in. Their supplements are designed to help the body perform its best naturally and effectively. Symbiotica's formulas combine science and so importantly, clean ingredients to support everything from focus and energy to glowing skin and better sleep. For example, the Shilajit Liquid Complex Flavored Hazelnut Cacao helps improve cognitive function, boost cellular energy and balance your hormones. Their Luposomal Glutathione in Citrus Berry flavor, which is quite possibly my favorite supplement, promotes glowing skin, gut health and healthy aging thanks to faster nutrient absorption through luposomal delivery and magnesium. L Threonate with a smooth vanilla cream flavor that supports your focus, calm and restful sleep, which we all need. Every product is carefully crafted with bioavailable nutrients and the convenience of their monthly delivery makes staying consistent so easy. For anyone looking to elevate their daily wellness routine like me, Symbiotica offers a simple, effective way to start feeling better from the inside out. Go to symbiotica.com aspire for 20% off plus free shipping. That's symbiotica.com aspire for twenty percent off plus free shipping when I was building companies from scratch, I tried countless sales tools, but they were always so complicated, impossible to set up and actually packed with features I never actually used. It felt like I needed a full time admin just to manage the software that was supposed to make my life easier. That's where today's sponsor, pipedrive comes in. Pipedrive is the number one CRM tool for small to medium businesses. It's a powerful, simple CRM and you can get it up and running within minutes. My favorite part about pipedrive is how seamlessly it fits into my workflow. We conduct so much of our business through emails and meetings and with pipedrive you can plug your inbox in and your calendar directly to your CRM. So everything lives in one place. It also lets you automate your sales process so you never have to worry about about forgetting to follow up on a hot lead. It's intuitive to use because it's made by salespeople for salespeople to join the over 100,000 companies using Pipedrive to supercharge their sales, head to pipedrive.com aspire right now. When you use my link, you'll get a 30 day free trial. No credit card or payment needed. That's pipedrive.com aspire to get started.

[Mel Robbins]

I.

[Emma Grede]

Want to talk to you about, but quickly before I do that. Cause it's such an important thing. And I speak to so many women, especially in business, that have got themselves into tricky money situations. What do you say to people that feel completely at a loss and without hope to get themselves out of a really bad financial situation? Because you've clearly gone full circle.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. So you're not gonna do it overnight. You have to do it over time. And one of the best things about being in a tricky financial situation, or a terrifying one, because there's nothing more crushing than the stress that comes from not being able to pay your bills. But you can get yourself out of it. But you have to face it. You have to face it. Like I let the bills stack up for six months and didn't open.

[Emma Grede]

Oh shit.

[Mel Robbins]

That's very common. Most people don't look at their bank account. Most people don't understand. I believe the research is at somewhere between 700 and $800. I don't remember if it's a month or a year of subscriptions are actually attached to your pay. They're just coming right out. All the streaming services, all the apps on the phone. And so one of the first things you have to do is first of all, there's so much information you have to say to yourself, I am going to face this. I'm gonna stop telling myself it's too late, the debt's too big, I can't possibly do it. Yes, you can. And there's a lot of amazing podcasts and amazing free books and amazing things that you can look into that will walk you step by step. But first you have to say, I am going to figure this out. I am going to get smarter about money. And one of the best things that that taught me, Emma, is that when you. The first way that you have to look at things is what's actually going out. Most of us try to solve our debt by trying to make more money without realizing you can find a lot of money if you get honest with yourself about all of the crap that you don't need that you're buying and where your money's going. And you will never be successful in a business if you don't understand money in and money out. And it begins with you personally. If you are a train wreck with your personal finances, you don't. You will not have the skills to actually manage a P and L. Absolutely not. And so that period taught me to really button down and to recognize you have so much more than you think in terms of the way that you spend money and consume. You don't need what you think you need. You can do without a lot of things. And if you are able to look in the mirror and go, okay, this is what I got. This is where it's going. I'm gonna now look at experts. I'm gonna now go get help. I'm gonna start calling the credit card companies, I'm gonna stop beating myself up. And you start saying to yourself, I can figure this out. For me, it took a decade.

[Emma Grede]

Like, I'm not going to take a decade on payout. 800 grand. Yeah, that'll take a decade. Do you have the same type of clarity and visibility over your business now? Because you must have seen so many different income streams, so many different things happening, such a giant team. What does that look like for you as a businesswoman?

[Mel Robbins]

We have 50 full time employees and studio spaces in Boston. And I have a unbelievable CFO and COO who's also my sister in law. And she came.

[Emma Grede]

I love a family member.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. She came from a company where she was the CFO of a company that experienced. And we are the opposite. And she is a brilliant, brilliant person when it comes to that side of the business. And I mean, we review it weekly.

[Emma Grede]

Great. So you understand what's happening.

[Mel Robbins]

I understand exactly what's happening. See, it's important to understand what data's important. It may surprise.

[Emma Grede]

You said this a couple of times. Yes. When you say data, you're really just talking about what information to take notice of.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. So it might surprise you to know that I do not have the backend numbers on my own podcast and I do not look at the rankings. You don't? No, absolutely not.

[Emma Grede]

Did you train yourself not to look at it in the same way people don't look at when they're, like, losing followers? Is it a fear thing? Where does that come from?

[Mel Robbins]

It's because that's not the metric that matters.

[Emma Grede]

What's the metric that matters?

[Mel Robbins]

The metric that matters, there's two for me, is we send out an email five days a week called the Impact Email. That is a roundup of anywhere from 20 to 30 screenshots from social media, from reviews from the inbox.

[Emma Grede]

This is an internal email.

[Mel Robbins]

Yeah, but to every partner.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, got it.

[Mel Robbins]

It goes to every agency that works with us. And you see front and center what somebody is saying about what changed in their life. It's not like, I love you, Mal.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, it's like a sentiment report for.

[Mel Robbins]

You guys, but it's the actual screenshot. We had somebody say yesterday, thank you for the episode you did with Dr. London last night. I knew that I was starting to go into cardiac arrest because of what I learned on that podcast. Oh, shit. I am alive today because of that podcast. Thank you for that.

[Emma Grede]

So what you're saying is you take a customer first. I would call it a customer first approach. Cause I'm not really in podcast land as much, but it's like it's a listener first approach. You care about what they are saying, which is exactly how I think about business. It's like, if you are going to do one thing, just focus on your customer. What does she say?

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. But here's what you've got to ask yourself, whether you're just beginning. Who's it for? What's it for?

[Emma Grede]

Who's it for? What's it for?

[Mel Robbins]

Yes.

[Emma Grede]

Really simple.

[Mel Robbins]

Very, very, very simple. Because you obsess over losing followers, but you're not taking care of the ones that are there. You obsess over what your friends think, but you're not actually. You haven't even lasered. Your business is not for your friends. Your business is for who you're gonna serve. Your business is not for your family. It may impact, but it's for the people that are gonna find it and need it and for the problems that you're solving with it. That's what it is. And if you start to obsess over followers, you're now obsessing over the people who have left versus really focusing on the one that's here. Before I would go on and give a keynote speech. I would center myself by saying, Even if there's 27,000 people in this arena, I would say there is just one person who is sitting in this audience who is meant to be here. Because there is something they are about to hear or experience that will make their life better or will help their daughter who has anxiety or will give them the hope that's missing. That is the one person I'm talking to.

[Emma Grede]

Mel, where did you learn that? Where did you get to be so focused on that one person? That one little shift that you can make? Like, where does that come from?

[Mel Robbins]

Two things. I watched my parents. My parents are so community minded and were so engaged with other people. Like, we would go to the farmer's market with my mom and it would be this long stall with 40 vendors. And she'd be, she knew everybody's name, their dog's name, their kid's name. She'd be like talking with Frank. And I'm like, oh my God, mom, we're just here to get sugar snap peas. Like, why do we have to talk to every. And so I just watch this. I watch people show up at our house. My dad was a small town doc and we had like, we ran like the minute clinic and our. He was the hometown doctor for the football team. He just. I just watched my parents care about and be interested in other people. That's one second thing was when I was a public defender in New York City, you meet your clients for the first time after they've been arrested and they're in jail and they're awaiting arraignment. And here in the United States, you have a constitutional right to have the charges read before you, an attorney assigned, and an arraignment where they're gonna do a bail hearing. And part of what they consider when they are considering bail is ties to the community. I can't tell you how many times I would walk out into that courtroom night after night after night. Cuz I worked the night court shift. Because arraignments run 24 hours a day in New York and nobody was there. Nobody. And maybe because it couldn't be, maybe because they couldn't afford the subway pass, maybe because there was no phone to call. Maybe because they were so sick and tired of this person getting in trouble, they were done showing up. Oh, wow. But it just broke my heart that no one was there. And so I just had this silent resolve that I would be there, I would show up, I would see people. I cannot believe how many people walk past the person cleaning the bathroom. And don't look at you, don't say thank you, don't say good morning. It's disgusting to me, like how you can't see another human being and the power of a smile and the power of the energy. You know, if there's one thing that I am constantly fighting against, it's discouragement.

[Emma Grede]

Yes.

[Mel Robbins]

This deep sense that people have that they don't matter and that there's nothing they can do to change the situation that they're in. Because of my own life experience and because I've turned my own attitude and my own health and my own marriage and my own finances and my family and everything around, I've changed it entirely.

[Emma Grede]

You've changed everything.

[Mel Robbins]

Everything.

[Emma Grede]

Everything.

[Mel Robbins]

From the inside out. Everything. And yes, it takes work and yes, it takes time. But nobody's gonna come and do it for you. Nobody's gonna save you. If you want your life to be better, it's your responsibility to do that for yourself and to make it better. And it's the single most important thing you could do because it's just gonna go away like that.

[Emma Grede]

I agree with you 1 million percent.

[Mel Robbins]

And so to me, all of that is kind of tied up in this deep, sincere interest in other people, this deep, sincere desire that if I can save anybody the headaches and the heartaches that I've caused myself or caused other people, because I didn't know the number of years that our son Oakley struggled because we had no idea it was dyslexia and adhd. He was being labeled a behavior problem. And how sad it made me to realize how many kids get shuttled in a direction that they don't deserve because they don't know what they're dealing with in terms of the way they're like, we can change this. We can help each other. And so that was kind of. The premise for the Mel Robbins podcast was simple. I got tired of watching everybody else launch podcasts. I missed the days of radio. I wanted to do longer form content. A lot of people don't realize that a lot of my company was the keynote speaking. But then I have a production company and a lot of people know Reese's company. Hello, Sunshine. Because it's public facing. I have the exact same type of business, only I partner with people like Starbucks and with LinkedIn. We've built the single most successful course on all of LinkedIn.

[Emma Grede]

And I know this. You have a business.

[Mel Robbins]

We've been hired by Audible to do so 6 original audio series for them, for their subscribers.

[Emma Grede]

So Talk to us about the verticals of that business. Cause I want to talk about this new business that you've launched, but you have a serious empire around you. That's what you're building.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, yes, yes.

[Emma Grede]

Not well, yes. I'm just going to say it. Yes, yes, yes. Because what I came to and what I saw.

[Mel Robbins]

What did you see?

[Emma Grede]

Well, first of all, I mean, first of all, it's what you feel. You were hanging out the window. There's all these people, they're all like best in class in their field, right? When I had, I don't know, maybe recorded three or four podcasts, your whole team made themselves available and said, what do you need? How can we help you? What information would be useful to you and your tiny two people team right now? They spent the entire time that we recorded helping. My team have since done multiple zoom calls with them. And every now and again, when we don't know something, well, we're going to call them and they answer and they give us the information.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, let me tell you, so beyond.

[Emma Grede]

Just incredible people, you have built a real, like a real company that is making moves and doing incredible things in multiple verticals.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, if you want to win, which I do, you have to become a student of the game. You want to become the master of. And so before I got into the podcasting space, I had a business I was running and I studied the podcasting space. Who's on top, who's not, what are the formats, what are the lengths, what are the demographics look like? The information's all there. Like, if you want to launch a business, the coolest thing about today is you can actually study everybody. The roadmap is right, it's there. And you don't have to worry about copying anybody because everybody copies each other, number one. But number two, you will always make it your own because you can't help but not to, because you're going to be doing it. So I just started to recognize, okay, if you want to compete, it's got to be at least two days a week. Oh, if you want to compete, it's got to be an hour. Oh, if you got to compete. And my goal in launching this would be that within a year we would be able to break into the top 100 once. Like even just like a boop, we're there. Okay, screenshot that we did it. Okay. Yes, exactly. And I hired one person because I was placing a bet because the vast majority of podcasts do not make money. And there's a huge, as you said, huge Number of them. And you'd have to be some sort of sociopath to think that you could break through somehow and have something wildly successful out of the gate. And so I just assumed it would take a year. That it would take a year. Hired one person, and we continued with existing operations on other thing. And we recorded the first episode on the floor of the closet in my bedroom because it's the only place it didn't echo. I live in a old wood house in Vermont, and the mission was simple. I thought for a decade about all the people I would bump into. Not on stage, not in conference rooms. I. I'm the kind of person that doesn't talk to the people eating in the restaurant. I talk to the waiters, the back of the house. Those are the people listening to the Mellow Rogers podcast. My people are the people that I bump into in the hallway, that I see in the elevator, that I talk to in the grocery store. I thought about all those people, and I thought, what if we could create a podcast that was like a walk with a friend? Because the mistake that I think most podcasts make is that we have a conversation and we keep talking to you as you're listening or watching right now. But most podcasts, you have a conversation and you let people eavesdrop. That's not what I'm doing.

[Emma Grede]

No, you're not.

[Mel Robbins]

Not at all.

[Emma Grede]

No, you're not.

[Mel Robbins]

I've constructed from the very beginning a podcast production and philosophy that is about the one human being who's tuned in and how do we obsess over every single detail so that this one person who is listening, who is driving or walking, feels like they're with friends, feels like we have our arms around them, feels like even if we have some neuroscientist with 50,000 degrees that I can't pronounce, that we're not smarter, we're all just in this together, that if you're just learning this for the first time, you're not behind, you're right where you need to be, and that it's packaged in a way that's entertaining and encouraging. And I got something to do, and if it's good, you're then going to want to share it with somebody.

[Emma Grede]

Yes.

[Mel Robbins]

50% of the people that listen any given week have never listened to the show before, and they may never listen again. And that's okay. They came because somebody that they love listened and thought it was valuable enough that they shared it and recommended it. That's why this has exploded. We had been dominated in the top 20 of all podcasts since we launched. Not a single article was written about our show for two years.

[Emma Grede]

That's nuts.

[Mel Robbins]

Why was that? Because we don't. We're not part of the news cycle. We don't interview celebrities.

[Emma Grede]

And you just want to.

[Mel Robbins]

We do not talk about breaking news. Fair. Everything we talk about is Evergreen Fair. And I'm so proud of that fact.

[Emma Grede]

Yes.

[Mel Robbins]

Because it means that this show has become a global phenomenon, one person at a time.

[Emma Grede]

Well, also, Mel, you should be so proud, because I feel like you taught me such an important thing, and I won't forget it. Cause you sat opposite me and you did this triangulation and you were like, it's me and it's you and it's the listener. And when you keep that in mind, like, that is, like, that's where your entire chat always comes back to, right? This triangulation and that. You're never above anyone. You're never speaking down to anyone. You're on a level ever.

[Mel Robbins]

And we're welcoming you in, and you belong here. And you can learn this. You can apply this.

[Emma Grede]

But we're together, learning. That's always the sense that I get. Like, I'm like, oh. Like, I'm in it. And she's in it, too. And you're asking all the things that I'm like, but what about. And it's like, boom.

[Mel Robbins]

You just. You're right there. Well, a lot of people don't also realize that before we get to the mics, there's probably 50 to 100 hours of work that went into it.

[Emma Grede]

That's.

[Mel Robbins]

That's because we want to make it worth your time. Oh, no.

[Emma Grede]

Like, and this is what I mean.

[Mel Robbins]

And then there's another hundred hours after. Because we produce a different show for YouTube than we produce. Than you produce for listening.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, well, because the audio product is entirely different. Very different.

[Mel Robbins]

I'm focused on the impact, not virality. If I can make it worth your time and impactful, and it has a positive difference. If I shift. Shift you just slightly, you will share it with somebody else.

[Emma Grede]

Facts. I mean, that's just like the 101 in terms of marketing. It's like if you buy a fantastic bra, you're going to tell your friend that you've got this fantastic bra and you're going to come back and buy another fantastic bra. Enough. That's how I don't need to create a bra that does. You know, water squirts coming out of it.

[Mel Robbins]

It's fine.

[Emma Grede]

It's like we can just make the great product and the people will come. So let's just talk a second because you've made another great product, but this time, Mel, it's a little bit different from the other products.

[Mel Robbins]

And I've never done anything like this. You're the first person I'm talking to.

[Emma Grede]

About, first of all, I am so happy that I'm the first person. But when you said to me, I'm actually creating a branded product, I was like, what are you talking about? And you kept saying this thing. It's pure genius. It's pure genius. It wasn't until I managed to get the little thing in my hand that I was like, oh, it's called pure genius. That is pure genius.

[Mel Robbins]

I don't know what this is.

[Emma Grede]

I could just die. First of all, talk to me about this little perfection.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, I'll tell you what it is. I'll tell you what it is. So there's nothing like it on the market. It's pure genius. That's the name of the brand. It is a 23 gram whey protein shot that has all the amino acids you need. It's shelf stable, it is 100 calories, it has zero sugar, it's gluten free. And here's the coolest part, it's not chalky. You don't have to choke it down. It will fill you up, but not bloat you. It's clinical grade. So if you're on GLP1s or fighting cancer or when my dad had brain surgery and they were trying to give them those shakes that nobody can choke down, the medical scientific board for this that is launching that I cannot disclose right now is so unbelievable because it's people that do the actual research and academic papers and that are treating patients and are in clinical practice.

[Emma Grede]

And Mel, it's a shot.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, check this out.

[Emma Grede]

Dunk, dunk. Because I'm out here with a giant protein shake and I'm bloated and I don't wanna drink it and I don't want all that.

[Mel Robbins]

Well, here's how this happened. And this is how you find a problem to solve. This is what you always talk about. So I have listened to every expert. I'm listening with you on my own podcast. I can't believe how much we're all learning. Dr. Amy Shaw came on I'll never forget it, in 2023, episode 77. And she came on and started talking about resistance training and protein and that not all proteins created equal. And I'm like, what all this shit I'M scooping in my smoothies. Not actually counting towards, wait, I need how much protein? Resistance training for hormones. That began and then it was.

[Emma Grede]

That was the spot.

[Mel Robbins]

Dr. Gabrielle Lyons, who's muscle centric medicine and all about your muscles and protein. Then Dr. Stacy Sims, who by the way is the number one most shared episode of the entire world on Apple this year, talking about resistance training and protein. She's a PhD from Stanford.

[Emma Grede]

I must have shared that episode 1,000 times. I think it was me. It's so incredible the way she speaks, what she tells us, her wisdom, it's so counter, like the narrative that's happening right now. I was like, what do you mean I don't need to go in the cold plunge like that.

[Mel Robbins]

Like, what is happening? And what do you mean I shouldn't exercise without eating protein? Exercising on an empty stomach for women.

[Emma Grede]

Is because it's for women. The information was for a woman, by a woman.

[Mel Robbins]

So I made it my goal this year to get more protein. I made it my goal to do resistance training. And I'm gonna tell you something, it's really hard to get a lot of protein.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah, I know.

[Mel Robbins]

And I'm cooking and I'm shaking and I'm smoothing and I'm cottage cheese and I'm egg bites and I'm doing what I can and I'm always falling short every day and the bars are melting in my purse and I gotta refrigerate it so I can't take it on the go. And so I started calling doctors and saying, what do you do? I started asking other people in the space, what do you recommend? And I bumped into these people that were working on this shot and I got so excited about it that I said, I want to get involved. And when I say get involved, I mean become a complete control freak. And a year ago, I became a co founder behind the scenes of this brand new company called Pure Genius that was working on a whey clinical grade whey protein shot. That is the viscosity of water. You can pour this in a margarita, you can pour this in iced tea, you can chug this, you can put this in your kid's lunchbox. When my dad was having brain surgery and we couldn't keep him nourished, he could have taken this. We have a doctor from the Mayo Clinic who has gotten on board who told us that sucralose is counteracting to chemotherapy. It's one of the worst things that you can eat if you're a cancer patient.

[Emma Grede]

Is that true?

[Mel Robbins]

It is true. And so she cited all the research on it. So I've been to the labs, I've been working with the scientists. We have driven the formulation. Our scientific board has signed off on this. They cannot wait to start recommending this to people. Because we're taking protein out of the gym and into your life and into your golf bag and your backpack and the lunchboxes. It's for everybody because we all need it and we're trying hard. We're cooking our meals, we're doing our prep, and we're falling short. And so I am so proud. We have created a solution that is under $4 that you can trust, that is research backed, it's simple, and it fits into a busy person's life. And by the way, that's pure genius.

[Emma Grede]

Ding with the light bulb.

[Mel Robbins]

Ding.

[Emma Grede]

That is just right. It's so good. Mel, how proud are you of this? Are you dying?

[Mel Robbins]

I'm dying because I need this. And when I first saw the product, it tasted like shit. It was too sweet and the ingredients were junky, and I needed something to help me bridge the gap. And I said, I'm gonna get involved. I'm gonna get involved because I think this is a solution that anybody can.

[Emma Grede]

At the level I operate, time is everything. I'm always looking for ways to clear the noise so I can focus on the big decisions. And honestly, Shopify's AI tools have become a quiet superpower for me. Sidekick especially. It cuts out so much of the busy work so I can actually lead my businesses. Whether it's drafting product copy, checking in on performance, or planning out content across all my brands. It feels like having a marketeer, an ops lead, and a creative director right in my pocket. And I've really felt it day to day. AI is actually helping me move faster, see patterns sooner, and make decisions with so much more clarity. That's what working smarter actually looks like. And of course, Shopify is the platform I trust to build and scale businesses. Just like I've done time and time again. It's behind so many brands you already know, like skims and Good American. Whether you're launching a side hustle or going all in on that next big idea. Shopify takes the complexity out of commerce, local, global, digital, physical. It supports it all in one simple, smart place. No more juggling logins or disconnected tools. You don't need a big team or design skills either. Shopify just gives you beautiful templates, powerful tools, and AI features that are actually game changers. It's like having an interview, entire team backing you up. This is your sign. Start your entrepreneurial journey now with shopify.com.

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[Emma Grede]

How are you thinking about this? Is this like a pure business play to you? Is it a wellness play? Like how are you thinking about the Mel Robbins branded product?

[Mel Robbins]

Well, everything I do is simple, it's useful, it's relatable and it's research backed. And I am not an expert in protein. I am a normal person trying to get more protein like everybody else. And so when I got involved there are a couple things that I think are really important. Never sign a deal that you will regret in success. The deals that I have been really pissed off about are the ones where it turned out to be really successful. And I was a dummy.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

And so if you are able, I wasn't able in the beginning of my life I was, you know, when I have to pay your bills, you take whatever deal you can, you take whatever project you can, you go, go, go, go, go. And then you work and do your side hustle on the side. That's the other thing that's really important to understand. You should never ever ever quit your job because the research Shows if you keep your job while you work on the thing, you are three times more likely to be successful because you don't put economic pressure on the thing.

[Emma Grede]

No, that is 100%.

[Mel Robbins]

So in the beginning you'll take shitty deals, but when you get to the point where you're gonna do something and you have a little financial security, never take a deal that in success you're gonna be angry at yourself. So, for example, another thing about my business, I own everything. I do. I do joint ventures.

[Emma Grede]

Oh, yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

I do joint ventures on the book. So no advances, just joint ventures. So it's a straight prospect split?

[Emma Grede]

Yes to that. Eight million books sold.

[Mel Robbins]

I sever all the audiobook rights and do it myself.

[Emma Grede]

You do?

[Mel Robbins]

Of course. It's just a digital file. Why would I let somebody else participate in that?

[Emma Grede]

Why would you?

[Mel Robbins]

Why would you?

[Emma Grede]

Why would you?

[Mel Robbins]

Why would you? Because you.

[Emma Grede]

Well, you're Mel Robbins. You've got one of the most recognizable voices in the whole world. Why would you.

[Mel Robbins]

But why would anybody?

[Emma Grede]

But I. Well, let me tell you, and a lot of people do, because they don't understand their power and their genius. And I think that you should, and you clearly do. And you are really building this very, very impressive media company behind the scenes. And I don't know that, you know, maybe this is not what you care about particularly, but it's very, very clear that you're a very astute businesswoman.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes.

[Emma Grede]

Like that is what you're building right now.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. And it's critical when you're building a business to understand what is important to.

[Emma Grede]

You to control and what is important for you to control. Cause right now you're the face, you're the founder. What is it like? What is becoming the most important thing for you?

[Mel Robbins]

I have to have control over the product and over what I am being asked to do. I have to have control over my time. I will never be talent in somebody else's game. That's why I've never put my name on a product. It's why my name is not on this product.

[Emma Grede]

Damn right.

[Mel Robbins]

I wanted to step in as a co founder because it was critical to me that if I was gonna get behind something, I had to go to the lab. I wasn't gonna just slap my name on something like a lot of people do. I was going to get to the lab and meet the scientists. I was gonna build my own medical board. And by the way, you wanna know the first person I called? Dr. Amy Shaw.

[Emma Grede]

Course you did.

[Mel Robbins]

When you go to the lab, you're.

[Emma Grede]

The Rolodex of the doctors.

[Mel Robbins]

I'm like, you're the one who started all this. You're like, hello. Well, she's also a triple board certified iv, Educated Cornell, Yale. That's to me, why a mom of.

[Emma Grede]

Two young people trust you with this. Because I know that you have spent the last God knows how many years speaking to the best of the best of the best doctors.

[Mel Robbins]

Of course.

[Emma Grede]

And so you already won't accept any shit.

[Mel Robbins]

Absolutely. And then I wouldn't. It took six months to actually get the legal work done because there was no way that I would be outvoted by a board on the meaningful things that matter to me. You cannot change the formulation unless I say yes. You cannot change the branding unless I say yes. You cannot do certain things unless I say yes. And here's the other thing that's really important. You have to understand what you're good at and what you're not. I am not the operator. I have partnered and have co founders that are genius at operations.

[Emma Grede]

Pure genius.

[Mel Robbins]

Pure genius. I am the person that is driving the formulation. Yes. Ding, ding. I'm the person that's driving the formulation. I'm the person that's driving the branding. And I'll even tell you the story, the inspiration for the branding. I was walking with Dr. Amy and my business partner Christine. We had just gotten done with the lab. The packaging came back, and it looked like everything else. And I'm like, I'm not inspired. This is, like watery and fruity, and it's unlike any other protein you'll ever like. And it's clinical grade. Like, we gotta have something, like, iconic. I need something great. And I'm like, I gotta call Emma. And I said, you know, this is gonna sound really cheesy, guys, but I'm gonna admit something to you. When I am looking at bottles of water, I'll admit it to you. When I select smart water, I feel smarter. I don't even know why I need the PhD, but I feel smart. And here's what I want.

[Emma Grede]

Facts.

[Mel Robbins]

I want people to feel like a genius.

[Emma Grede]

Yeah.

[Mel Robbins]

When they're making this choice. Yes. And I'm like, and what is the icon for genius?

[Emma Grede]

It's a light bulb.

[Mel Robbins]

Thomas Edison.

[Emma Grede]

It's a light bulb.

[Mel Robbins]

Einstein. It's a light bulb. And I know it's cheesy, but I don't care, because here's another metric I'm gonna give you. We did this for the book cover. We did this for this. If I'm walking down the beach, I Wanna be able to spot the let them theory book cover half a football field away. And no, that's not it.

[Emma Grede]

Boy, do ya? I saw those all over the beach this summer.

[Mel Robbins]

If I am in a gym or in a schoolroom cafeteria, or I'm at the mall, or I'm anywhere in life or I'm online, I wanna be able to see this and go, oh, that's that thing. And then I wanna hide something cool in it. So it's all inspired by vintage light bulbs and the geniuses of modern day and the past, which we will be celebrating in the brand rollout. Pure genius.

[Emma Grede]

It's pure genius. I'm so happy for you because I actually really believe in this product. I think there's a need for it. I need it right now. I know people listening will be like, when can I get it? Where do I get it? How do I get it? It's like, just go to Mel, find Mel, she's gonna hang it.

[Mel Robbins]

Here's the thing, you don't even need to buy it. Just go to Pure Genius protein and read the science. Because I want you to be educated about protein. Because the biggest news to me is if it doesn't have the amino acids you need, it doesn't count. Like if you don't see leucine, if you don't see the essential amino acids on the label in terms of it being part of the complete protein, it doesn't count. And there's a lot of things being labeled, especially targeting women, that don't count.

[Emma Grede]

Well, we definitely don't want that. We don't wanna waste our time now.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes.

[Emma Grede]

Well, listen, I cannot wait to see your ever growing success with this thing. I've got two really quick questions to you. The first thing is that you have spoken to to countless experts, professionals, doctors, leaders of all different types. I want to understand. When you think about the things that you've taken into your life, when you distill that information, the things that you know to be true, what are some of the most important things? What does Mel Robbins get up and think about every day? Because you know it to be true.

[Mel Robbins]

The settings in your mind can be changed. That your mind is not just a supercomputer, it is a spotlight. And everything that you think has been programmed from the past. And if you don't like the noise up here, I want you to get very intentional. And I want you to start to train your mind. And I'm gonna give you two things to do every single day. This is gonna sound super cheesy. I know you do something similar. You are going to wake up and say, today's gonna be a good day. Even if you're going to a funeral, today's gonna be a good day because I'm gonna show up and I'm gonna support people that I love today, and we're gonna celebrate somebody that I deeply care about. Today is gonna be a good day. You have just signaled to your brain to now spotlight out and look. And I'm gonna prove to you that you can do this. Cause here's the second thing I want you to do today. As you're walking, I want you to look for a heart. I want you to just scan around and see if you can see anywhere around you the shape of a heart. It might be a stain on the floor. It might be the shape of a leaf. It might be, you know, a pattern in the wall. I see one right now. And what you're doing is you are. When you say, I'm going to find a heart today, you are programming and changing the settings up here in your brain. You are activating something called the reticular activating network. It's like a hair net on your brain that changes over time. And it's paying attention to what you say is important. And mark my words, as you start to make it a daily habit, today's gonna be a good day. And I'm gonna find a heart today. I'm gonna scan, I'm gonna train my brain, and you start to see them everywhere. That is evidence that you just manually change the settings on your mind. And it's so important to understand that, because the way that you see the world and what's possible determines the world you see. And there is so much good and there is so much right in front of you. And there are people that are in front of you that are there to help you. There are people that you're currently jealous of or that have achieved the things that you want to achieve. They are literally angels on the path ahead of you, guiding you. You can study them. You can go to Microsoft Copilot, which is the AI platform I personally like, because I have used it since 1990. And I don't think they're gonna make a lot of big, scary decisions. Cause I don't think they want to go out of business in the race to the bottom. I think they really wanna figure this out. So I trust them. You can put in anything you want and it'll give you the plan. But then you've gotta make sure you have a mindset. That says, I can figure this out and I'm gonna keep trying and keep showing up.

[Emma Grede]

Mel, when you think about your legacy, what do you want to be known for?

[Mel Robbins]

My legacy for sure is the let them theory that I gave to the world. A modern version of the ancient wisdom and the fundamental truths about life that we could apply in moments when things seem profoundly out of control and it helps you feel more peaceful and in control. But when I think about the legacy in a smaller way, I just think about my children and I think about every single person. This is what, like, I really hope my legacy is that people say, boy, she really was a good person and she made me feel good about myself and she left the world a little bit better than she found it. I think that will happen for you, Mel. It happens every day, actually. Pretty.

[Emma Grede]

I'm pretty frickin sure about it. I'm so happy to have you here today. We're gonna do a very quick, rapid fire, and it has to be rapid. Mel Robbins, first thing you do when you wake up in the morning, get out of bed. Last thing you do before you go.

[Mel Robbins]

To bed, I do this thing where I just like literally put my hand on my heart right as I'm like, I'm actually in bed. So I'm thinking falling asleep, out of bed. Kiss. Just. That's it.

[Emma Grede]

I love that. What's a book that changed your life? The Let Them Theory.

[Mel Robbins]

The Let Them Theory for sure changed my life. Almost every book changes my life in some way or another. But a book that's really struck me was the Emperor of Gladness Ocean. Vaughn wrote it. We just had him on the podcast. It's a book about the fact that there is dignity and beauty even when you're really struggling. It's a book about people that meet each other while they're working at Boston Market and become a little bit of a family. And if you've ever worked a retail job, which we both have, you're treated like garbage and you feel invisible. And you often question if your life is ever gonna go anywhere because you feel frozen in time and insignificance. And the book is really about just accepting, exploring the beauty in life. There's this moment when his mom was dying. He was sitting by her bedside and kind of talking and reminiscing and tell me some of your favorite memories. And she said, my most favorite thing I'm gonna remember is sitting in the McDonald's parking lot eating chicken nuggets with you. That's your life.

[Emma Grede]

That's your life.

[Mel Robbins]

And if you're not careful, you're gonna be so consumed and so busy with meaningless stuff that you're gonna miss it.

[Emma Grede]

Now, what are you currently aspiring to in your business life? Tell me in your business life first.

[Mel Robbins]

What I'm aspiring to is to achieve the same level of excellence and impact with less time to use technology in a way that gives people more time to focus on the artistry and to be smarter with that and to also use technology. Cause our podcast is evergreen. So I started investing in AI tools two years ago so that our content would speak to generative search. And so I'm very interested in translation tools and things that will help bring the world renowned experts and these episodes that we pour our hearts and souls into to people around the world who may not speak English or who don't have the platforms that they're currently on. It's unlikely you'll see me ever do one of these big deals you're seeing now with all the other people jumping. Because my podcast needs to be free.

[Emma Grede]

Right.

[Mel Robbins]

Great answer on mission.

[Emma Grede]

Great answer. Always, always back to the mission. Always back to mission values.

[Mel Robbins]

Take the money. Don't deviate if it's against your mission. Do not do that. Yeah.

[Emma Grede]

It will be very expensive.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. Well, a much more expensive, much more profitable deal will come along in the future. Even if the profitable deal is just closing your eyes at night and knowing you stayed true to yourself. Damn right.

[Emma Grede]

What are you aspiring for in your personal life?

[Mel Robbins]

More time with my husband and kids. More time with my girlfriends. I'd like to see you more.

[Emma Grede]

I mean, hello.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes, I'm very happy you're here in la.

[Emma Grede]

I will tell you that. What are the big pieces of advice that you have for women in the world right now? Those that are navigating ambition and their personal lives and, you know, those that are. Because we're in a funny old time.

[Mel Robbins]

Why do you think it's a funny old time?

[Emma Grede]

Well, you know, I think it's a funny old time. Cause there's so much insecurity out there. I feel like people used to come in and do their job and feel really good about it and now they're worried that, you know, their job is not gonna be there for them and they might be struggling to have a baby and they're feeling uncertain that they should even have a baby because they don't know what's gonna happen. And they're thinking about climate change. It's a time of great insecurity for people, I think.

[Mel Robbins]

Yes. So, number one, and notice I didn't.

[Emma Grede]

Mention the political climate there, but we're just gonna go over.

[Mel Robbins]

I think that's part of it too. First of all, I don't buy into the collective illusion. I do not buy that the loudest, most extreme and disgusting voices represent the majority.

[Emma Grede]

They don't.

[Mel Robbins]

They don't.

[Emma Grede]

Just because they don't.

[Mel Robbins]

They don't. But I do think it's seeping into people's weariness. What I would say is if you feel all those things, you're having a mentally healthy response to a world that feels like it's spinning off its axis. Those are worthy things to worry about. And so I just want to validate that. And the worrying, is it helping you? Does worrying about AI does worrying about whether or not you're going to get pregnant, is it helping you achieve the things or even just stay peaceful? And the answer is probably no. And so the reason to attack the worrying and the reason to focus on that is because it's not helping you, it's actually hurting you. And if you can get control of that and you can go, let them, like, let AI come. I can't control that. But let me remind myself, I could spend this weekend leaning into the skills. I could spend this weekend asking, do I even like this job? And do I want to make a pivot now so that I'm taking control and not sitting here feeling insecure like a sitting duck? You know, let them, whether I get pregnant or not, even though it's high stakes stuff, but let me just take the best care that I can and let me tell you myself that my body's able to manage this. And that the more I take care of myself and I trust how things are gonna work out. I trust my ability to be okay. That if I'm in a calmer and safer state, then I'm setting myself up to be in a place to be capable and to also help myself achieve those goals. Cause we know stress does not help. But I think the main thing to say, if everything's important, nothing is. And one of the fastest ways to take control is to sit with yourself for a day and ask yourself, what is actually important to me? How am I going to measure success? And when you really go through this exercise and you look at everything that's on your plate, you'll notice that 90% of it is other people's expectations and emergencies. It doesn't have to be done today. And if you can learn how to slow down and every day go, okay, what's, what's the number one thing that I need to focus on today. Somehow you're going to start to feel more in control again. And all of the emergencies take care of themselves anyway because they draw your attention. But you got to get back into what's the number one thing for me today. Because if I allow everything to be important, nothing will be important in my life.

[Emma Grede]

That's a great piece of advice. This is the final question I have for you. What is something that you used to value deeply, that you no longer value other people's opinions? The best answer. Mel, I love you. Thank you so much for being here. It's the best. You're the best.

[Mel Robbins]

You're the best.

[Emma Grede]

I love you. Thank you. Thank you.

[Mel Robbins]

Beyond proud of you.

[Emma Grede]

Thank you guys.

[Mel Robbins]

Thank you.

[Emma Grede]

If you're loving this podcast, be sure to click follow on your favorite listening platform. While you're there, give us a review and a five star rating and share an episode you loved with a friend who'll be so, so grateful. Aspire with Emma Greed is presented by Audacy. I'm your host, Emma Greed. Our executive producers are Corrine Gilliatt Fisher, Derek Brown and me. Our executive producers from Audacy are Maddy Sprung Keyser, Leah Reese Dennis, Asha Salouja and Jenna Weiss Berman. Stephen Key is our senior producer. Sound design and engineering by Bill Schultz. Angela Peluso is our booker. Original music by Charles Bur Black Video production by Evan Cox, Kirk Courtney, Andrew Steele, Carlos Delgado and Arnie Agassiz. Social media by Olivia Homan Special thanks to Brittany Smith, Sydney Ford, my teams at the lead company and wme. Maura Curran, Josephina Francis, Hilary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Kate Hutchinson, Rose, Tim Meekol, Sean Cherry and Lauren Vieira. If you have questions for me, you can DM me at Aspire with Emma Greed. Greed is spelled G R E D E. That's Aspire A S P I R E with Emma Greed. Or you can submit a question to me on my website. Emagreed me.

[Mel Robbins]

I don't know about you, but when I'm using AI for my business, I don't need it to tell me what to do. I know what I want. I just need help making it happen. With wix, I finally have an AI tool that gets things done the way I want. I just have to describe the type of website I need and it's ready. I can even ask it to manage my inventory, plan my next marking campaign, or help out my customers. Wix gives me AI wherever I need it. Try it [e-mail].