Bachelor Happy Hour: Harsh Realities and Never-Ending Puberty | Golden Hour
Date: September 19, 2025
Hosts: Kathy and Susan
Podcast: Bachelor Happy Hour (iHeartPodcasts & Warner Bros)
Episode Overview
In this candid and relatable episode, Kathy and Susan dive deep into the changing realities of relationships, the evolving definition of "settling," and navigate listener questions about dating, friendship, and body image. They offer heartfelt advice, share personal experiences, and confront society’s expectations about women’s bodies and beauty standards — from puberty through menopause. The hosts also respond to listener write-ins ranging from shy daters to complicated work flirtations, topped off with an uplifting life update from a past advice-seeker.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Meaning of "Settling" in Relationships
[04:24-09:38]
- Changing Definitions with Age
- Kathy and Susan discuss how the concept of "settling" in relationships shifts as people age.
- Susan: "Not everybody's going to be perfect anymore... It's a different look for me at this age." (04:35)
- They differentiate between healthy compromise and settling on core values.
- Kathy: "Settling is going against your core beliefs, your core wants and needs, your checklist." (05:17)
- When Is Compromise Acceptable?
- Compromises are necessary, but “settling” against your core dealbreakers (like integrity, honesty, or fidelity) rarely works.
- Kathy: "If I dated a man who did not have integrity, I would be settling. And I'll never do that." (05:55)
- They agree that settling isn’t always doomed, but long-term happiness hinges on not violating one's most important values.
2. Advice for a Shy 21-Year-Old Listener (Haley) Struggling to Date
[09:49-15:14]
- Initial Advice:
- Susan suggests joining group activities, meet-ups, clubs, and taking group trips.
- Kathy emphasizes the importance of baby steps, especially for someone with strong shyness.
- Kathy: "Before you jump into clubs and things... work on bringing yourself out a little bit, a little bit at a time." (10:35)
- Building Social Comfort:
- Practice socializing in small groups with friends (with or without boyfriends) to ease the transition.
- Different Approaches Collide:
- Playful back-and-forth as Susan pushes for bolder steps and Kathy stands her ground on gradual progress.
- Kathy: "I think you gotta take baby steps. And the baby step is not going off to... Ethiopia." (13:24)
3. Navigating a Complicated Work "Friendship/Flirtation"
[20:00-26:51]
- Listener's Dilemma:
- A 26-year-old writes about a male coworker who blurs friendship and flirtation lines, making her uncomfortable after text exchanges turn sexual.
- Susan's Take:
- Mixed feelings; suggests clearer communication from the start could have helped.
- Kathy's Perspective:
- The listener is not "played" if her intentions were not made 100% clear.
- Kathy: "If it felt like it was 0 to 100, girlfriend, it's cause you didn't apply the brakes." (25:05)
- Advice to Listener:
- It's okay to set boundaries; it's also okay to try and salvage a platonic friendship if she chooses, but clarity is key.
4. Uplifting Listener Update: Cohabitating Success
[27:14-29:40]
- Listener Update:
- Past advice-seeker shares a positive update: moving in with her boyfriend went extraordinarily well and an engagement may be ahead.
- Listener: “It’s been a wonderful year of growth for our relationship and I think there’s an engagement coming soon. I got goosebumps.” (28:21)
- Hosts' Reactions:
- Susan jokes about officiating the wedding, delighting in the listener's growth and resilience.
- Kathy: "This update has made my day... To get such a fabulous update, I'm so happy." (28:55)
5. Girl Chat: Bodily Changes & Beauty Standards at Every Age
[29:40-47:00]
Ongoing Physical Changes
- Menopause, Puberty, and Beyond:
- Kathy and Susan highlight that women's bodies change constantly — not just in puberty or pregnancy.
- Kathy (on menopause): "Do bears shit in the woods? … Yeah." (30:17)
- Susan: "Our body chemistry changes. We are constantly changing when it comes to our bodies." (30:44)
Breaking Down Beauty Myths
- Social pressure and shame can make natural changes harder.
- Kathy: "So little women... feel shame sometimes because, you know, they can't have children anymore. What, they're not useful anymore?" (32:39)
- Both hosts urge self-acceptance and contextualize bodily changes as natural and normal.
Exercise, Diet, and Feeling Good vs. Societal Perfection
- Kathy: “There are no tricks... I work out, I lift weights, I power walk... I do it because it makes me feel better.” (33:21)
- Body changes after pregnancy, menopause, and with age are inevitable and should be met with gratitude and self-care.
- Susan: “Be so grateful that you and your partner were able to bring this miracle to life... It’s about being healthy.” (34:13)
Advice for Struggling with Body Image in the Age of Ozempic and AI
- Kathy: “Most of the pictures you see on social media, everything’s airbrushed... That’s not reality.” (37:22)
- She cautions against "quick fixes" like Ozempic for off-label use; encourages a healthy lifestyle focused on long-term wellness and body acceptance, not chasing unrealistic standards.
- Susan calls out Kathy for her own self-criticism:
- Susan: “You still struggle with body image... You need to follow your own advice.” (38:51)
- They discuss the evolving meaning of beauty, the emergence of "curvy" as a celebrated norm, and focus on health over appearance.
Memorable Quotes:
- Kathy: “Motion is lotion.” (33:41)
- Susan: “Those perky boobs fall down to your waist... have them brought back up, that's all.” (34:59)
- Kathy: "All women know this — dryness during sex. That was unexpected. Lots of things you can do for that." (35:58)
- Kathy: "Be kind to yourself... I try to self-talk and that would be my advice." (39:17)
Notable Quotes & Moments
| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote | |-----------|---------|-------| | 04:35 | Susan | "Not everybody's going to be perfect anymore... It's a different look for me at this age." | | 05:17 | Kathy | "Settling is going against your core beliefs, your core wants and needs, your checklist." | | 10:35 | Kathy | "Before you jump into clubs and things... work on bringing yourself out a little bit." | | 13:24 | Kathy | "I think you gotta take baby steps. And the baby step is not going off to...Ethiopia." | | 25:05 | Kathy | "If it felt like it was 0 to 100, girlfriend, it's cause you didn't apply the brakes." | | 28:21 | Listener| "It’s been a wonderful year of growth for our relationship and I think there’s an engagement coming soon. I got goosebumps." | | 30:17 | Kathy | "Do bears shit in the woods? … Yeah." | | 33:41 | Kathy | "Motion is lotion." | | 34:59 | Susan | “Those perky boobs fall down to your waist...have them brought back up, that's all.” | | 37:22 | Kathy | “Most of the pictures you see on social media, everything’s airbrushed... That’s not reality.” | | 38:51 | Susan | “You still struggle with body image... You need to follow your own advice.” | | 39:17 | Kathy | "Be kind to yourself... I try to self-talk and that would be my advice." |
Episode Timestamps for Key Segments
- Settling vs. Compromising in Relationships: 04:24-09:38
- Advice to Shy 21-Year-Old on Dating: 09:49-15:14
- Workplace Flirtation & Friendship Boundaries: 20:00-26:51
- Listener Update: Moving in with Boyfriend: 27:14-29:40
- Bodily Changes and Beauty Standards Discussion: 29:40-47:00
Takeaways
- The definition of “settling” evolves with age and life experience; compromise is healthy, but do not abandon your core values.
- Building social confidence takes time and baby steps; lean on friends in the process.
- Open, honest communication is crucial when setting boundaries in new relationships or friendships.
- Bodily changes are a lifelong process; self-acceptance and education about what’s “normal” are key.
- Resist media and societal pressure for perfection; focus on wellness, not unattainable beauty standards.
For listeners and Bachelor Nation fans alike, this episode serves up wisdom, laughs, and real talk about love, bodies, and embracing change at any age — always with a supportive, “you’ve got this” Golden Hour vibe.