Jenny McCarthy on Ashley Iaconetti, ‘The Masked Singer,’ and More | Happy Hour

Summary

Bachelor Happy Hour – Jenny McCarthy on Ashley Iaconetti, ‘The Masked Singer,’ and More

Podcast Original Air Date: July 15, 2026
Hosts: Charity Lawson & Rachel Recchia
Guest: Jenny McCarthy

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Episode Overview

In this lively episode of Bachelor Happy Hour, hosts Charity Lawson and Rachel Recchia welcome TV personality, actress, and longtime Bachelor Nation fan Jenny McCarthy. The discussion dives into Jenny’s evolution as a Bachelor viewer, her wish to be the Bachelorette, her hilarious backstory with Ashley Iaconetti, the changing face of reality dating shows, her experiences with love on and off screen, reality TV’s impact on relationships, and her work as a judge on The Masked Singer and founder of Formless Beauty.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Jenny McCarthy’s Bachelor Nation Fandom

Timestamps: 03:02–05:38

• Jenny has been an avid fan of The Bachelor since the beginning:

  “The funny thing is, I've probably been watching this before you guys were born. That’s the scandal.” (Jenny, 03:32)

• She loves the show for its “awkwardness, hopefulness, and the real-time human nature” you see play out.

• Observes how everyone plays a ‘representative’ version of themselves in the early stages of relationships, especially under the competition dynamic of the show.

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The Celebrity Bachelorette That Never Was

Timestamps: 05:38–09:50

• Jenny reveals she once tried to pitch herself as The Bachelorette after her divorce, leveraging her “Singled Out” fame, but producers turned her down because they didn’t want famous people as leads.

  “I would have made the greatest Bachelorette of all time...I would have made out with all of them. I would have just...been, like, so awesome on that show.” (Jenny, 06:32)

• She argues there’s room for a celebrity Bachelorette/Bachelor season and suggests celebrities would date non-celebrities — as long as the latter are secure and confident.

  “Celebrities want to date real people...as long as the non-celebrity feels good in their place in life.” (Jenny, 09:54)

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Casting & The Influence Economy

Timestamps: 09:50–14:50

• The hosts and Jenny discuss how casting has changed: Early Bachelorette stars like Trista Sutter were genuine and untainted by social media, whereas today’s contestants often arrive with influencer ambitions.

• Jenny points out the logistical side: the casting pool favors trainers/coaches/influencers because they can leave work for months, while traditional 9–5 professionals can’t.

  “I can see why casting gets inundated with those, and their schedule allows them to come on the show. The problem is...that pool also is trainer/influencer, health coach/influencer. So I don’t know how they can improve it...” (Jenny, 13:34)

• Rachel asks Jenny’s opinion of the “dating show to influencer to famous” pipeline:

  “Am I mad at it? Not really...It just is how it is today. I would like them to start out with an authentic search for love.” (Jenny, 14:16)

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Ashley Iaconetti: From Nanny to America’s Sweetheart

Timestamps: 14:54–16:38, 22:19–23:25

• Jenny discloses Ashley Iaconetti (“Ashley I”) was her son’s nanny before going on The Bachelor.

  “She was my son’s nanny. And then one day she’s like, ‘I can’t work for you anymore because I got chosen to go on The Bachelor.’” (Jenny, 15:07)

• Jenny mentored Ashley: “I was like, listen, you’re gonna do everything I tell you to do, and you’re gonna make it...But Ashley was authentically looking for love. That’s the thing — those tears are genuine.” (Jenny, 15:11)

• Praises Ashley’s charisma, sincerity, and recent return to reality TV with Real Housewives, but jokes, “We’ve got to protect her from the Housewife spell!” (Jenny, 23:31)

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Reality TV, Marriage & Relationship Advice

Timestamps: 23:31–37:30

• Jenny talks about filming reality TV with her husband Donnie Wahlberg and their family, citing how crucial a solid foundation is.

  “When you’re filming, you’re exhausted, your ego comes out, you’re worried about how you’re perceived...but our foundation was so solid.” (Jenny, 23:31)

• She gives advice for Bachelor couples transitioning from the “bubble” to real life: prioritize your relationship over chasing fame or “relevance,” and get into therapy early.

  “If you put more work into maintaining identity versus the work in your relationship, you are doomed...So I would say: date, talk, get into therapy.” (Jenny, 26:14)

• Jenny shares a deeply personal story about how couples' therapy helped her and Donnie overcome a potential rift triggered by past relationship trauma and phone “hiding”.

  “After that, it was just like, I didn’t have to hide my phone anymore...That is a great example of healing couples therapy and utilizing it for a successful future.” (Jenny, 32:16)

• On why peace now matters more than chemistry:

  “Back in the day, I viewed love as wanting chemistry, and now I view love as wanting peace.” (Jenny, 35:27) “To have peace in a relationship means everything. Let’s define peace: happiness, joy, unconditional love...all fall into place when you have peace.” (Jenny, 35:40)

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Relationship Wisdom: Aging, Expectations, and Self-Love

Timestamps: 42:25–44:18

• Jenny assures listeners that love gets easier with age, as expectations drop away:

  “In my 20s, 30s, even 40s, it’s like you are yearning, you have all of these expectations. If they’re not fulfilled, you’re sad. You stop having those when you’re older...It is not your partner’s job to fix you...It’s your job to love you. The bonus is he does love you.” (Jenny, 42:25–43:53)

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Pioneering TV: Singled Out, The Masked Singer, and Entertaining America

Timestamps: 44:18–49:34

Singled Out

• Jenny describes the wild casting process of 90s dating show “Singled Out.”

  “We had a van that we drove around LA, [picked] people walking down the street...drove them to the studio and filmed.” (Jenny, 44:49)

• Notes how dating TV has changed — there’s much less “true love” and more entertainment now.

The Masked Singer

• Jenny loves judging for The Masked Singer, especially its fun, family-friendly energy and positivity.

  “I love that we get to give everybody flowers…there’s no Simon Cowell.” (Jenny, 46:46) “I'm so ultra competitive...producers had to tell me, ‘You realize this is just a game show, right?’” (Jenny, 47:59)

• Dream “Masked Singer” contestants? “Give me a Britney Spears or Beyonce and I’d be happy.” (Jenny, 49:01)

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Creating Formless Beauty: A Clean Beauty Brand

Timestamps: 49:36–53:46

• Jenny started Formless Beauty after experiencing skin allergies and discovering many “clean” brands aren’t truly clean.

  “I was mortified that these quote clean brands...they’re lying...So I was like, you know what, I’m gonna start my own brand and see if anyone wants full transparency and truly clean.” (Jenny, 50:00)

• Partnered with Environmental Working Group to certify products. Their mascara is EWG verified and frequently sells out.

  “What does that mean as a brand? By the way, there ain’t no other celebrity brands with EWG verification.” (Jenny, 52:40)

• Special code JENNY10 offers listeners a discount.

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Rapid Fire Game

Timestamps: 53:48–56:10

• Masked Singer – Best Costume:

  “Probably the snail...you know who was inside the snail? Kermit the Frog.” (Jenny, 54:29)

• The View – Hardest part of Live TV:

  “When you have menstrual cramps or when you're sick...and you still got to get it up.” (Jenny, 55:05)

• Scary Movie 3 – Funniest Setmate:

  “Pamela’s delivery was so good...when she asked me if I'm okay after my head’s been decapitated. It's so hilarious.” (Jenny, 55:30)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On early Bachelor authenticity:

  “Trista...was the first one that was able to come in before the word influencer became an actual name in the dictionary. She went in there looking for true love, and guess what? She found it.” (Jenny, 11:49)

• On relationship health:

  “As soon as resentment enters a relationship, you have, oh, it’s sands in the hourglass before it’s over.” (Jenny, 34:45)

• On emotional growth:

  “Remember, it is not your partner’s job to fix you. It is not your partner’s job even to love you...It’s your job to love you. The bonus is he does love you.” (Jenny, 43:17)

• On aging and love:

  “All you youngsters out there—it gets so much easier...when you’re older, you just sit in the beauty of love.” (Jenny, 42:25)

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Conclusion & Where to Find Jenny McCarthy

Timestamps: 56:10–56:47

• Jenny is launching a new podcast in October and invites listeners to follow her at @jennymccarthy (Instagram/Twitter) and Mrs. Wahlberg on TikTok.
• Her clean cosmetic line: formlessbeauty.com (code JENNY10 for 10% off).

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For Listeners

A vibrant, candid discussion not just about behind-the-scenes Bachelor Nation, but about authenticity in love, the pressures of public relationships, self-acceptance, and the blessing of wisdom with age. Jenny brings honesty, humor, and warmth — making this episode a must for Bachelor fans and anyone seeking relationship advice that’s both real and inspiring.

Transcript

[Podcast Host (Ad Read)]

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[Rachel]

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[Charity]

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[Rachel]

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[Charity]

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[Jenny McCarthy]

Hey everyone, it's Kalpen. I'M inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart audiobook club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Charity]

Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hour. I'm Charity.

[Rachel]

And I'm Rachel. And today we have a very special guest who is a longtime Bachelor fan, Jenny McCarthy. Jenny, welcome to Bachelor Happy Hour.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Thank you so much. I'm excited to talk to you guys.

[Charity]

I love Bachelor Nation as we know it, which we're. I love when, like, Bachelor fans and just people who have really watched the show and seen it from really start to finish come on this podcast because there's just so much to dive into. And as we know it, this show has truly changed over the years. So I want to get into literally your history of being a Bachelor fan. What about the show itself hooked you like, what made you so intrigued by it?

[Jenny McCarthy]

The funny thing is, I've probably been watching this before you guys were born. That's the scandal.

[Rachel]

No way.

[Jenny McCarthy]

I'm an OG Bachelor Nation girl. So the reason why I. Well, I know why I love it, but I also think people love it, too, is there's an hopefulness, there's an awkwardness. You Absolutely. Even though it's on TV and things are polished, you can't escape the awkwardness of the first meetings. You can't escape the awkwardness of the first dates. And it's really cool to watch. Of course, egos come alive, competitions, insecurity, but also the ones who are confident. You actually can learn a lot by watching the show. Because you go like this, oh, I don't want to be like her. Or, oh, I want to be like her. There's so much that you can learn. And I always have fun watching people. Everybody does this. I don't want to say just a batch of people, but this is televised. You get to watch it happen in real time. People send out their representatives. And what do I mean by that? Whenever we start dating someone, the first two years, we have our representative pretty much representing us. What does that look like? It means. It means, like, your boyfriend might be like, you know, you like football. To football. I love watching football. And then two years later, you're like, I freaking hate watching football. Because your representative has. It's almost like masking a little Bit because you want to be perfect. You want them to like you. It's just a normal part of human nature. So. So to watch it happen on the TV show, you know, you're getting a crash course in it. But the. Because of the competition, you get to see the ugliness side quicker than you would in a normal relationship. You're going to see, you know, and I give those girls a lot of credit because I don't know if I could handle. I'm a Scorpio and very jealous. So I would be like, I would go Southside, Chicago.

[Rachel]

Oh, my gosh. Wait. So if there was another world, would you have ever been the Bachelorette? If they asked?

[Jenny McCarthy]

Cool. I have some gossip for you. You ready?

[Rachel]

I don't think they ask you.

[Jenny McCarthy]

They just started the Bachelorette. I don't know how many years they were into it. And I was newly divorced, and I called my agent and I said, I want you to call them, and I want you to pitch me as the Bachelorette. I want you to tell them that Jenny McCarthy from MTV singled out the number one dating show of all time, is single and now wants to be on the show. And I was. You guys don't know, but my show, back in the day, I was a ball busting, like, sit up to the guys. Like, I had no fear. But I was also, like, genuinely looking for love. And I was like, I would make the greatest Bachelorette of all time. And the show said, quote, we don't want famous people on the show.

[Charity]

Now cut to it.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Yeah. I was like, oh, my God. They're gonna. I'm like, I would have done. You guys understand. I would have. It would have been the most ultimate Bachelor Nation season of all time. That is because I would have. I would have had so much fun with those boys. I would have made out with all of them. I would have just. I would have been, like, so awesome on that show.

[Rachel]

I feel robbed we couldn't see this.

[Charity]

No, Right?

[Jenny McCarthy]

I'm so mad. Still to this day, I'm always like, they missed their chance. But then Amy Schumer I saw years later also called and said, hey, I want to be the Bachelorette. And they said the same thing to her. No. I feel like they're kind of missing out on the celebrity version. They can literally call it the celebrity version of Bachelorette because I think it would really, really do. They've got other celebrity versions of everything else. Why wouldn't you do the celebrity version of Bachelorette? But they're lost now because now I'm Happily married.

[Charity]

Love that.

[Rachel]

Oh, my God.

[Charity]

No, that. That really would have been a season. Honestly, I do think like, you know, now in modern days. I don't even like saying that. Just like now in time. I feel like they are trying to obviously as we know it, try new things and see how. How well it sticks in lands. But I think, yeah, you know, there is a world where people do it. Yeah. A big following or something like, you know, it could be. Could be helpful. I'm like, I would love to see Rob from Traders as our bachelor. Like, do you know Rob Ross? Am I saying his last name right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Yes. Wouldn't he be like, do it with the. Forgive me because I didn't watch the show. The Mormon wife show. The woman that did not hair thing did not air. But that was their first attempt to cross current cross contaminate on that one.

[Charity]

And that's fair.

[Rachel]

Is there anyone that you would like to see in that role if they were ever to do a celebrity season

[Jenny McCarthy]

now that Amy Schumer is single? Right. Didn't she get just announced her divorce?

[Charity]

No, I did. I. Oh, I might. Is that.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Let me just Google that real quick.

[Rachel]

She would be hilarious.

[Charity]

No, insane.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Insane.

[Charity]

Insane.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Someone fact checked me on that I could have made it better dream. But she would be. She would probably do all the things that I would have done if I was on the show.

[Charity]

Oh, beyond, like, it would be a completely different show if she was.

[Jenny McCarthy]

You know what I would have done too.

[Charity]

Completely different.

[Jenny McCarthy]

I am so good. I also know how to make great tv. So it would have been a little bit of me trying to find love. Me just making out with the guys because I could. Because it's okay on that show. But then also I would have fun pitting them against each other.

[Charity]

Oh, she's like, I'm stirring the pot completely.

[Rachel]

Oh, my.

[Charity]

I'm like, I feel like they do a good job of that on their own. Like, they really do.

[Jenny McCarthy]

But I would have been like, man, Brian really, really shoved his tongue down my throat and I liked it. You know what I mean? I want to use.

[Rachel]

Oh, my gosh.

[Charity]

This is the type of personality.

[Rachel]

This is exactly what we need. And I feel like in this role, if you did bring a celebrity on, do you think they would be okay dating just the average everyday person or do you think that contestants would have to be celebrities as well?

[Jenny McCarthy]

No, I think 100% celebrities want to date real people.

[Charity]

Yeah.

[Jenny McCarthy]

It's just a matter of finding a real person that knows how to stay in their Lane, what I mean by that is sometimes your partner can feel insecure no matter what job they have. You know, whether that be a famous, even football player and an actress. But with someone's, let's say, a really amazing attorney and the best in their field, they're still going to have an insecurity. So as long as the non celebrity feels good in their position and their place in life, that's what the celebrity would love to date. Look at Cameron Diaz and the cameraman, right? It's like there is hope for the celebrity, non celebrity. It's just a matter of finding that confident guy or girl that won't get caught up in the fame drama.

[Rachel]

Couldn't agree more.

[Charity]

I 100% agree. Where do you feel like, I don't know, if you've been watching Bachelor up until this point or if you've taken some pauses, totally understand what you have. Yeah, but, like, I guess how casting has, like, I guess changed over the years. Obviously when, like, Trista was, like, our first Bachelorette, it was very, like, everybody had, you know, nine to fives, obviously, social media and influencing and all of that has created such a shift in, like, careers and what is, like, I guess, deemed as, like, oh, what we want to see and what people want to do more of. But I also think that indirectly or directly plays a role in how the show is casting, because I feel like now it's adds this extra layer of, like, almost like people being superficial. And it's like you have to pull back that layer of like, okay, are you really here looking for love, or do you just want, like, a good opportunity, a good role to, like, make great tv? So where do you feel like casting can improve in that department of selecting people to come on the show?

[Jenny McCarthy]

That's a really beautiful question, Charity, and I love the way you kind of set that up so nicely. This is. If you were to ask me who my favorite Bachelor Bachelorette of all time, it would be Trista. It would be trusted because she was the first one that was able to come in before the word influencer became an actual name in the dictionary. She went in there looking for true love, and guess what? She found it. She found it. So that's what was so great about her story. And really, everyone should thank her because she proved. She proved. It just so happened that the first one actually, it worked for. But she. She proved to everybody else this isn't just a gimmick. This isn't just a game show. You can actually find your happily ever after. And to your point, the problem now is a lot of times people will make this their job, this their occupation. And, you know, if you think about is more difficult, though, to be like, if you're. Let's say at a job, you have an attorney, you're an attorney or something, you'd be like, yo, I'm leaving for three months. It's hard to leave a job to go do something for three months. You usually. You find people who maybe are wanting to be influencers that have those, you know, those kind of occupation or trainer. You know, how many trainers have we said because they're life coach? So many. So many. Because their schedules are more open. So I can see why casting gets inundated with those, and their schedule allows them to come on the show. So it's not all casting's fault. Those are. That's the pool that's more available. The problem is that pool also is trainer slash influencer, health coach slash influencer. You know, it kind of goes with those kind of jobs. So I don't know how they can improve it other than, you know, finding people that are okay leaving their jobs and really staying away from those typical stereotypical, you know, occupations.

[Rachel]

As someone who's been in the field as long as you have, what do you think about the current dating show to influencer to famous Pipeline?

[Jenny McCarthy]

You know, am I mad at it?

[Rachel]

Not really.

[Jenny McCarthy]

It happens. It just is how it is today.

[Charity]

Yeah.

[Jenny McCarthy]

I would like them to start out with an authentic, like, on this show, an authentic realness, an authentic search for love, genuinely looking for it. And if they so happen to fall upon an influencer type situation, fine. You know, like, there's a story I'll tell you in a little while. Unless you want to dive into it right now.

[Rachel]

I'd love to.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Is I have a little bit of a connection with a former contestant, which is Ashley I. Ashley I, who I love.

[Rachel]

We love Ashley.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Okay, so the story behind Ashley I, you guys, is she was my former nanny. Oh, my goodness. She was my son's nanny. And of course, my son was like, I have the hottest nanny in the world. Okay. Truly. And then one day she's like, I can't work for you anymore because. And I was like, why? Who's stealing you? And she's like, I got chosen to go on the Bachelor. And I'm like, no way. And I was like, listen, you're gonna do everything I tell you to do, and you're gonna make it. You're gonna just pull through. I don't know if you're gonna find love. But everyone's gonna know who Ashley I is after this. And she was authentically looking for love. That's the thing that you can tell from Ashley I is those tears are genuine. Are they ridiculous? Of course, but they are.

[Charity]

She's like a hopeless romantic for sure.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Oh my God. We thought in love with her through those tears. We fell in love with her through her beautiful, ugly cry because it was real. She really had these crushes, you know. So that's what I knew going into it is gonna work for her because she's got the realness part. She did so well on that show and she became like a little bit of an America sweetheart after that.

[Rachel]

She really did. I feel like Ashley I is such an iconic Bachelor Nation alumni and to know that you created Ashley is crazy.

[Charity]

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[Jenny McCarthy]

Or.

[Charity]

Or you can use the code happy hour at checkout.

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[Rachel]

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[Charity]

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[Rachel]

I've tried out Facetune and it's so fun to see what I look like with different hairstyles and different lighting. I definitely recommend it. Before you make a big change, you can even try out different makeup looks. Facetune can also smooth skin, vanish flyaway hairs and fix whatever your photo needs. It will make your pictures and videos flawless. So even if the lighting is not on your side, Facetune has you covered. Download Facetune free on the App Store or Google Play.

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[Rachel]

What do you think about her now on the Real Housewives?

[Jenny McCarthy]

I am so, so I was waiting for her to get back on reality TV because I'm like, when you have someone that is charismatic, that you like and that can cry like crazy. She can and she can. And she's crying her eyes out now. So it's like, I'm so happy for her. I'm so happy for her and her beautiful little family and she's just, she was meant to do this. I just hope that, you know, I hope with any of those housewives, there seems to be like, there's like, there's a. What is the word I'm looking for a spell that's, that comes over them, that's cast on them, where there's, you know, destruction, whether that be jail, irs, divorce. It's almost like Lord of the Rings. You guys ever seen Lord of the Rings? But you put on the ring, it's like the evil eye goes towards you. It's like you put on that housewife. You hold whatever they want you to hold.

[Charity]

Like the apple.

[Rachel]

Oh, my gosh, we got to protect her from this.

[Charity]

I know.

[Jenny McCarthy]

We really do. It's like, it's like that's where. That's where with any marriage, if you have a solid foundation, you don't have to worry about that. If you truly have a solid foundation, like Donnie and I did our own reality show not that long ago. Donnie did Wahlbergers with his brother. Then we, Donnie and I do kind of a spin off with ourselves. And people would say to us all the time, hey, are you worried? Are you worried about, like, this influence your relationship? And we'd be like, no, only because the foundation was so solid. Because when you're filming, you tend to. You're exhausted. You, your, your, your ego comes out a little bit. You're worried about what people think. You're worried about how you're perceived. Then if you're perceived the wrong way, are you blaming your partner? You're blaming the edits? You know, things can get really, really, really ugly. We only went three years because my son, who was also filming in the reality show, said he was turning into a teenager. And he was like, if you think I'm going through puberty on screen, you're out of your mind. Because there were cameras in our house all day long. Like, it's a real thing. Like, I'd literally be like, and at the end of the hallway, it's like a camera guy there, you know? So we said, okay, no more. You could still, of course, watch our episodes. They're still up on A and E. You can watch them. But it was, it was a family decision at that point because I said, the foundation isn't built and steady for my son. It was steady for me and my husband, but it's not for my son. And I do not want to do that. Because we see what happens to a lot of these kids on reality shows too.

[Charity]

Absolutely no. And like you mentioning kind of like the transition or not even transition, but there definitely is a contrast between, like, filming all aspects of your life. And that's like, you know, cameras on all the time versus, like, me and Rachel or like Ashley, obviously she met Jared on Paradise. But it's like we come from this, like, bubble where everything is just about finding love or it's about, like dating and you're kind of like tunnel vision on one person. But like, once that bubble Ends or pops, and you come back to real life or reality. That's really what I feel like, is where the work really begins, which our fans don't ever really see that part. They don't get to see that part of it unfold. So what's. What would be like, I guess, your advice for couples, Like, I met my fiance on my season of the Bachelorette. What would your advice be for couples? I guess making it sustain in the public eye, but also have this, you know, genuineness or authenticity about the relationship itself and not losing sight of that.

[Jenny McCarthy]

You know, that would be a very difficult transition because you're living in a mansion, all of your needs are taken care of. You have no outside influences during all of that time. You're in helicopters, you're going to fancy dinners, and it's like someone lets you live the life of Cinderella and then pulls your shoes and dress away and your house and everything and says, good luck. I mean, that would be. I respect anyone that has to go through that transition. You know, it's kind of like almost like getting fired from a job. You know, most of us, I think you've at least got your fired once where you feel like your identity's been stripped away, and that's kind of feel a little bit like that, too. My thing would. My advice would be. Is to dive into the relationship even more. Because if you're chasing the same identity or trying to stay relevant. That's the word. If you're trying to stay relevant in the public versus putting in the work in the relationship, you are doomed. You are doomed. Now, mind you, is there still things you can do? Of course there's, you know, influencer things. There's a way to, like, make some money and yada, and I'm all for that. But if you put more work into that, maintaining identity versus the work in your relationship, you're going to be in a lot of trouble. So I would say date talk, get into therapy. You know, Donnie and I would be. When we first started dating, actually, that's the first thing I tell you to do, is go from that show, go right into a therapist. When Donnie and I first started dating, we were like two months into the relationship, and I said, you want to do something fun? He was like, what? I'm like, let's go see. Let's go see a couples therapist. And he's like, what's wrong with us? And I'm like, nothing. That's exactly why it's a great time to go, because, well, we're older, but it doesn't matter for anybody. We all have go tos when we're in a fight, when we're feeling insecure, there's usually in a fight, there's the person that wants to talk it out and then the other persons that needs silent or does the silent treatment that might escape in the other room for a while. You know, we gravitate towards the opposite sometimes. So I said, why don't we go to a couple's counselor and figure out a tool belt, a toolkit that we can use when the time comes, when we have a disagreement, when we feel like we're going to fight because we're going to. Even though Donnie and I, I think, are the poster couple for happily ever after, we really, truly are madly in love with each other after 12 years.

[Charity]

I love that.

[Jenny McCarthy]

But it's because we did the work. And in that therapy session, we learned who was the person that likes the silent treatment. Who is the person that need to talk right now? How do we compromise? Is there a middle when someone is so on the opposite side of the spectrum? And there was, it was like, you're only allowed to go in the other room for five minutes. Like you can do five minutes. If you need 10, just ask for it. But you can't do two hours, you can't do three hours, you can't do the next till the next day. You get five to 10 minutes before you have to talk it out. Now the talk it out person also needs to know they can't go on a hamster wheel. Sometimes the talk it out person needs to repeat it over and over and over again and over and over and over again. And you're like, what are you doing? You're just repeating it. Have you not heard what I said? So there's a lot of those tools and the toolkit that a couples counselors can give you early on in dating, especially if you kind of know you want this person to be your happily ever after, go in early and learn those things. And it was so fun to learn that about each other. I'm sorry if I'm talking so much, but I'm going to keep going because it's podcast. This is perfect, right? It's also about in the new relationships, no matter how old you are, we tend to project whatever was in the past into the current relationship. I'm going to give you guys a really fun example of something that Donnie and I both brought in to our relationship. And if we weren't in therapy, it could have ended us.

[Rachel]

Okay.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Oh, so he Would walk into a room, and I would be on my phone. I'd go like this. And he wouldn't say anything, but he would just, like, whatever, just continue the conversation. Then I would be like, again, like, in the room, and he walk in the room and. And he'd be like, what is going on? She's obviously talking to someone. She's obviously cheated on me. Mind you, I've never cheated on a boyfriend in my whole life. I'm a serious monogamist. But I'll get to this. So I would be throwing down my phone, hiding my phone, hiding my phone. And then he was starting. He wouldn't say anything, and he was starting to push me away. Like, a little bit of distance between us. There was like, a little bit of, like, really not wanting to cuddle. And then like, I'm like, he's not as, like, talkative as he usually is. I'm like, what is happening? What is happening? So I was like, let's go to couples therapy and figure out what's going on. Me not even understanding that that was even a thing. I didn't even understand what I was doing. So we go to couples counseling, and he brings it up and he's like, I feel like she might be doing something suspicious. And I was like, oh, my God. I could totally see how that would look.

[Rachel]

Totally.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Now, mind you, I was coming out of an abusive relationship. That relationship, I was punished so badly. If I was on. If I was on TikTok, if I was on Instagram, if I was on Twitter, I was punished away. I was not allowed to have my phone in the house. In this relationship, I had a front door that they. He had a front door, like, casket, I called it, where you had to leave your phone when you walked in the door. So if you were caught with the phone, trust me, I guess some therapy through that one and got through that relationship real quick.

[Rachel]

Oh, my gosh.

[Jenny McCarthy]

But he would not allow the phone in the house because he wanted all of my attention.

[Charity]

That's a lot.

[Jenny McCarthy]

It wasn't about me cheating. Was wanting my attention like this. So if I got caught in that relationship with my phone, it was like total chaos. I had ptsd. I had post traumatic stress about being caught with my phone in the house. Then future relationships. It's probably why relationships after that didn't work because I probably was doing the exact same thing and didn't even realize it. Once Donnie heard about this trauma and I expressed more about this abusive relationship I was in, he had so much empathy for me that he was like, oh, my gosh, I had no idea. You poor thing. Like, how horrible. Now look at how we were able to take what could have turned into resentment, fear, and a breakup. And we were able to transform that into empathy and healing. And after that, it was just like, I didn't have to hide my phone anymore. Like, he was okay with me being on social media. He was okay me not going like this, giving him every little piece of attention. So, like, that is a great example of how you can take that, that healing of therapy, of co couples therapy and utilizing it for a successful future. So if any charity, I'd say, get your butts right into that.

[Charity]

We've never left. We've been in therapy since I got off the show. So. Yes. Good. Yeah, yeah. No, it's. It's like everything you're saying, I'm like, I already, like, was ready to go guns a blazing. I said, oh, we're leaving this show because I knew the transition was going to be very hard. And, like, I obviously don't know the ins and outs of every other leads relationship, but I'm like, I could imagine that that adjustment period alone is why a lot of couples don't really make it through. Because, yes, you have this honeymoon phase, but like you said, that's also your representative phase. You're putting your best foot forward to make it work until life hits you in the face and you're like, oh, I don't have what I need to get through this. And it's very, very challenging. And it does take work. That's the thing. It takes work from both ends of the partners or the people in the relationship to make it work. So listen, I'm like, I'm a very small percentage of the success story, but I'm right there with you. There wonders.

[Rachel]

Yeah.

[Jenny McCarthy]

So we're both proof. Proof that it works. And by the way, you don't need to be on the Bachelor to have this work for you.

[Charity]

Absolutely.

[Jenny McCarthy]

It's never not too late. Like, if you've been dating for a while, you've been married for a while. Because as soon as resentment enters a relationship, you have a. Oh, it's sans in the hourglass before it's over, stands in, the hour, goes forward. Because if there is any. Any resentment that always builds up, bleeds into it, and comes out in other yucky ways, and it really toxifies a relationship.

[Rachel]

No. So well said. And you and Donnie seem so genuinely happy, but the world has obviously watched you. Yes. Go through so many different phases and chapters of Love. What has changed the way you view love from back then to now?

[Jenny McCarthy]

You know, I think back in the day, I viewed love as wanting chemistry, and now I view love as wanting peace.

[Charity]

Come on.

[Jenny McCarthy]

You know that's a word, right? Because to have peace in a relationship means everything. Let's define peace when you put underneath that happiness, joy, unconditional love. Like, all of those things fall into place when you have peace. And does it take work? Absolutely. But, you know, in the beginning, and it's only normal you want chemistry in the beginning, but, man, if you don't have peace later on in that relationship, you know, a perfect example. My girlfriend has been dating this loser for about the same time I met Donnie, the same time she met him. Okay. And it's amazing because their relationship is so vile and they're screaming like, I watched the growth of me and Donnie of just like, I talked about being this peaceful place. They're so volatile and angry and like, breaking up, getting together. Breaking and getting up. He's cheated on her multiple times. Multiple times. Like, you know, I've been in a really other relationship for, you know, two years behind your back, and then she takes him back. It's like, I'm sorry, right? It's like, if you're not doing that work on you too, you're in trouble, girl. You are in trouble because you can't just always blame it on the. The guy either. So to go back to your point, me and Donnie worked also because I did the work on me and changed it from just wanting this hot, maybe chemistry to wanting the ultimate prize, which is peace.

[Charity]

That's really good.

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[Rachel]

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[Charity]

Summer is basically here, which means it's time to decide if you want to go blonde, maybe become a redhead or chop your hair short. But before you encounter a hair disaster, try it out in Facetune first and see what it looks like before committing to the change. It's a lifesaver.

[Rachel]

I've tried out Facetune and it's so fun to see what I look like with different hairstyles and different lighting. I definitely recommend it. Before you make a big change, you can even try out different makeup looks. Download Facetune free on the App Store or Google Play.

[Podcast Host (Ad Read)]

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[Charity]

This episode is brought to you by Reef. And if comfort had a personality, yeah, it'd be them. You probably think sandals and fair, but the woman's Neptune is proof that they absolutely nailed everyday shoes, too. This one slips right into your life, no planning required. The crushback heel lets you wear it your way. Just kick it on when you're rushing out the door, flip it up when the day calls for a little bit more stability is lightweight, breathable, and quietly doing the most, which I love. And the soft quilted insole, that part, your feet will thank you for later. For me, it feels like stepping onto a plush pillow every single time. I wore these on a full, chaotic day in the city. From subways to hailing taxis, running endless errands, meetings. And the best part of it all, not once did I notice the shoes that I was wearing because they felt that good. My feet were more than good. They were great. Great enough that it'll make you want to keep going and making sure that you're getting steps in. Easy, comfortable, and handled. If you want a shoe that keeps up with you without asking questions, check out the Woman's Neptune on reef.com and treat yourself to 15% off your first purchase. Do you feel like, as you have gotten older, do you feel like love is easier or loving comes easier versus how it was when you were younger? Or what's your take on that?

[Jenny McCarthy]

Listen, all you youngsters out there, it's. It gets so much easier. I mean, it gets so much easier. Again, if you do the work and you're in a good relationship. It's. Let me. Let me try to explain it this way. In my 20s, 30s, even 40s, it's like you are yearning, yearning like you. You have all of these, like, expectations. That's the good word. You have all these, like, expectations. And if they're not fulfilled, then you're sad. You stop having those when you're older. You just sit in the beauty of love. My expectations of Donnie are just the typical ones. Just like, don't cheat on me. You know, respect me and adore me.

[Rachel]

That's it.

[Jenny McCarthy]

I don't have all these other expectations. We just kind of sit in this flow of love. So it's just. It gets so much easier because you drop all those. This is what I need. This is what I need. This is what else. I need all those, like, expectations. And remember, it is not your partner's job to fix you. It is not your partner's job even to love you, if you can believe it. It's your job to love you. The bonus is he does love you. But it's the real thing is you have to truly fall in love with yourself and then everything else falls into place.

[Rachel]

Honestly, this has been such a wonderful conversation. Like, I feel like I'm learning so much.

[Charity]

I know I'm like,

[Rachel]

I'm writing everything down, but going more into you and your career, you helped pave the way for the Bachelor because before that you were the host of Singled Out. What was that like? Creating basically dating shows.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Yeah, that was so much fun. And it was also so crazy. So you know how you guys talked? We talked about how the pool of the casting people really are only able to find people who don't have a regular job, so to speak. And I say that nicely. You know what I mean? They're regular, like, yada yada. Well, my dating game show, we shot four episodes a day, during the day. And these are all people in their young 20s. We had a van that we drove around LA, ask people walking down the

[Rachel]

street who didn't get in the van

[Jenny McCarthy]

to get in the van. They'd load the van up, drive them to the studio and we'd film that.

[Charity]

And I'd be like, oh, my goodness,

[Jenny McCarthy]

meet your new date. It's Mike. And Mike lives with his parents, doesn't

[Rachel]

have a job, no background check off.

[Jenny McCarthy]

We found him in the mall. Like, some of them didn't even have teeth. We just said, don't smile when you're on camera. It was like it was the wild, wild west of dating. And, you know, we were, we were hip to the fact that it was more of an entertainment show than finding true love, because you're not going to find it in 14 minutes. But it was fun. It was a lot of fun. And it just, it had a huge impact. It was like, when I say it was like one of the. Within the first month of the show, just so you guys have some understanding of how big it was. I was on the COVID of rolling stone after 30 days of airing that show. That is how like, boom. It was so big. And I mean, I wish it would never work today. It would never, ever, ever work today.

[Rachel]

I was gonna ask what would have to change for it's work.

[Jenny McCarthy]

You know, they try to Revive it once. And they should have asked me to do it because they didn't ask you. They didn't ask me because I'm an old little bird, you know, I'm an old little bird. But I would have rocked it. I don't. I think it would just have to be left as an entertainment show. Like, I could make it work. But they said, like the network said people don't date like that anymore. I'm like, well, honestly, it's not. It's more of an entertainment show than anything.

[Rachel]

Absolutely amazing.

[Charity]

And you also obviously have had a reign on Mass singer as a judge. You crack all the celebrity clues. How has that experience been like for you? It's such a fun show. Like, love.

[Jenny McCarthy]

It's such a fun show. Can I tell you, when they first asked me to do it, my agent was like, this. This is the dumbest show ever. You ain't doing it. I'm like, listen. I said, this checks all the boxes, which is weird because I like a little weird and strange. It's got celebrity and it's got a game you can play. And singing. Like, I love listening. I'm like, this is. This is going to check all the boxes. Plus, I love that it was a family friendly show. I wanted something that my son could actually watch, something of mine. So I said yes to the show. We're going on season 15, I believe. 14, 15. Like, that crazy. And you know what I love, you guys is I love that. I get that it's that we're nice. There's no Simon Cowles. Like, we get to give everybody flowers. Because it's not. It's not easy to get up there and sing. Especially underneath the mask, even for celebrities, you know, so we don't say like, you're not gonna go to Hollywood. Your hair. Horrible. Why were you even famous in the first place? That was terrible. Sounded like roadkill, you know? I mean, like everything we do, we give flowers over their performances. And that makes me feel so, so good after the show. Plus, I am. If you watch the show, I am so ultra competitive, you guys. I am so.

[Podcast Host (Ad Read)]

I.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Would you call psychotic competitive? Like, I got yelled at numerous times by my producers. They've come in my room and said, you realize that this is just a game show, right? Like, you don't want to prize Jenny. Because I get. I get upset. Obsessed. I get like. I'm like, the movie Beautiful mind or what's that chess movie with that lady with the chessboard. Whatever. I. I get into, like, this crazy. Like, math Metat. Math. Math.

[Charity]

Help me, mathematician. Thank you, Math. Mathematician.

[Jenny McCarthy]

I'm trying to think of that meme. At the same time, I was trying to think of math meme.

[Charity]

Oh, I know.

[Rachel]

The equations are coming across.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Yes, that is me. You know what I mean? And so sometimes I get a little crazy, but I'm still the best guesser on the show, and I plan on continuing that.

[Rachel]

I have a dream that one day Charity will go on the masked singer. Who would you love to see on as a contestant?

[Jenny McCarthy]

Well, now that my husband already showed up as someone behind the mask, I can't name him, but I also. I wear my producer hat also. So I can tell you, if we got someone like a Britney Spears, it would make great tv. It would make a great. I think it would be so fun to have, like, a Britney Spears. Now, my taste in music. I'd love to have Beyonce, but someone big.

[Rachel]

We're saying go big or go home.

[Charity]

At this point, if you're gonna ask

[Jenny McCarthy]

me to have a magic wand and a genie in a bottle, it's gonna. I'm gonna say Beyonce. Okay.

[Rachel]

Of course.

[Charity]

I love that. Okay, let's talk about your beauty brand, because as we know it, you have a beauty brand called Formless Beauty. And I am very curious, as me and Rachel are both beauty lovers. What got you into wanting to make or start your own brand?

[Jenny McCarthy]

I'm so glad you guys asked, and I'm going to be sending you some stuff. So after this, make sure.

[Rachel]

I can't wait.

[Jenny McCarthy]

So I started to get a lot of allergies. I'd get, like, skin rashes, rosacea irritations. And I'm like, I'm going to look into toxicity and makeup. And I wasn't ready to start a brand. I just wanted to look into the ingredients. And I was mortified, you guys. I was mortified that these quote clean brands, like, when you go to the store and says the clean section, that they're lying, that there's no regulatory agencies that are actually looking over to say, yeah, they're clean there. You look under the hood, you're gonna find a ton of toxins. So I was like, oh, my God, there's no one I can trust. So I was like, you know what? I'm gonna start my own brand and see if anyone wants full transparency and truly clean. Okay? So I formed Formless Beauty. I started only with three glosses, and I teamed up. I don't know if you guys know who the environmental working group is, but if you don't know who they are, you should all know who they are. E. Wg.org this is an organization that looks under every product and tells you what's good or bad. Okay? They're. They've been doing this for years. They've got doctors and scientists. So I called them up and I was like, yo, I want to create a beauty brand under your science. You did the work. I just want to know what not to put in, what are bad ingredients and what are good ingredients. They were like, that's awesome that you want to do that, but it's really hard. Good luck. They handed me a book of over 900 pages of unacceptable ingredients and said, don't use any of these ingredients. Then they sent handed me a book of over 700 restricted ingredients, said, don't use these. So I sat down with my canvas and was like, oh, my God, how are we going to do this? So we did it. We made like, our mascara. Right now it's in a glass tube. Our mascara just got EWG verified. When you're EWG verified, what does that mean as a brand? By the way, there ain't no other celebrity brands with EWG verification. Okay? So EWG verified means we went through the top, strict, most utmost, responsible testing you can possibly do for makeup. That is how clean. And I respect my. My clients are people that don't want to get cancer, people that do have cancer, people on chemo, people with loomis, lupus, ms, arthritis, you name it, rosacea. All these people who care about truly clean ingredients, we have now gathered to create a much bigger brand. We're now in Sprouts. So if you're near a sprouts, you can go check out our. Because people who go to sprouts also care about ingredients. So I highly suggest you guys trying our skincare. Our cleanser takes off your eye makeup like that without burning your eyes. It's the greatest cleanser ever. But I hope you I'm going to send it to you guys. But try the mascara to try the mascara. We sell out constantly, by the way. We can't keep it in stock. It's our MVP because it's one. Do you guys know that mostly hormone disruptors are in every mascara?

[Charity]

I know. It's like the hardest thing. I'm like, except ours. Oh, amazing.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Ours doesn't have it in there. So if you guys are listening and want a discount code, you can put in Jenny 10 to try it out that gives you 10% off. Go to formless media.com and check it out and take that discount.

[Rachel]

Yes, yes. And Jenny you are someone that sat in the makeup chair for years and years and years. So we are so thankful that now there's a brand that is healthy and that isn't causing anything harmful to us. So congratulations again, because Sprouts is huge.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Thank you so much. I appreciate that.

[Charity]

Truly. Cannot wait to try it. I'm excited. I'm, like, trying all the things and trying to get on my wellness journey and be, like, you know, very adamant about it, but it's. It's hard. And I love hearing your backstory. Obviously, you've done the work and poured into this brand. So very excited, and congratulations again.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Thank you. Thank you. Appreciate that.

[Charity]

Okay, we are going to play a game now. We love a game. We always end most of our episodes with a game. So we are going to name one of your projects and ask a rapid fire question that goes with it. So pretty.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Okay, let me take a sip of water.

[Charity]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

[Rachel]

First one, masked singer. What was the best costume?

[Jenny McCarthy]

Do the best costume. That's a great question. So probably. There's probably the snail. We had a snail that came on and we was like, oh, my God. Because it was, like, really kind of small to the ground, but it was still, like. It was still like 4ft high. But you know who was inside the snail? Who?

[Charity]

No.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Kermit the frog.

[Rachel]

I didn't know what he was saying. Oh, my God.

[Jenny McCarthy]

By the way, you guys, when.

[Charity]

That's actually crazy.

[Jenny McCarthy]

When we were listening to them sing and I'm doing this, I said to Robin, I said, robin, I don't mean to sound. I don't want to tell him that he sounds like. He sounds like Kermit, but I didn't want to say that out loud to offend the singer. And it turned out to be Kermit.

[Rachel]

Oh, my God.

[Charity]

So funny. Wait, okay. I'm like, I need to go back because I didn't even know that that was a thing. So I have to go back there and watch that. Okay. The View. Hardest part of live tv.

[Jenny McCarthy]

The hardest part of live TV is when you have menstrual cramps or when you're sick. When you're sick and you still got to get it up. Like, you're not sick and you got 104 fever. That's tough. That's really tough.

[Charity]

Like, the joys of being a woman.

[Rachel]

Yeah, no, literally working woman. All right, last one. Scary Movie 3. Who was the funniest person on set?

[Jenny McCarthy]

Well, you know, Pamela and I were the only ones in our scenes. I basically was the one that was that got killed. But to me, Pamela's delivery was so good. It was so good when she asked me if I'm okay after my head's been decapitated. And she keeps asking me, are you okay? It's so hilarious. Like, she's actually really, really funny. I didn't have anybody else on set to compare it to, but me and her had a ball shooting that.

[Rachel]

That scene is burned into my memory from my childhood. Like, I think we watched Scary Movie 3 all the time. It was so good.

[Jenny McCarthy]

It was so funny.

[Charity]

Oh my goodness. Well, thank you, Ginny, so much. This interview was such a joy. We are taking all of your knowledge, your experience, everything. We are just so grateful that you were able to join us on a happy hour. Where can people and our listeners follow you or keep up with you?

[Jenny McCarthy]

Well, you can follow my social media, which is pretty much Jenny McCarthy everywhere except for TikTok. I'm Mrs. Wahlberg, but I'm also launching my own podcast in October, so you guys can check out my website, Calm yeah for more information. So check me out. Follow me there. And here's to maybe I'll have you guys on. We'll do some Bachelor Nation breakdowns.

[Rachel]

That would be amazing. Congratulations to your new podcast, the Formless Beauty. And thank you again for being here and make sure you guys rate, review, subscribe wherever you listen to your podcast and follow us on Bachelor Happy Hour and BachelorMooshing. And we'll see you guys later.

[Jenny McCarthy]

Thanks you guys.

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[Charity]

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[Rachel]

Hey, question are you an ExtraCare member at CVS? Because there's literally no reason not to be. It's super easy to join and members instantly get extra big deals on the things you buy most. I mean, this is the stuff you're already buying. Snacks, personal care products, all of it. And after you join, the savings just start to show up. Deals are fresh every two weeks, but they don't last long. Head to your local CVS or open the CVS app, look for extra big deals and start saving today.

[Charity]

Summer is basically here, which means it's time to decide if you want to go blonde, maybe become a redhead or chop your hair short. But before you encounter a hair disaster, try it out in Facetune first and see what it looks like before committing to the change. It's a lifesaver. Facetune lets you try color, length or style on virtually any photo. It even works on reels and TikToks so you can see how you'd look as a blonde before you reach for the hair dye or hit that salon chair.

[Rachel]

I've tried out Facetune and it's so fun to see what I look like with different hairstyles and different lighting. I definitely recommend it. Before you make a big change, you can even try out different makeup looks. Facetune can also smooth skin, vanish flyaway hairs, and fix whatever your photo needs. It will make your pictures and videos flawless. So even if the lighting is not on your side, Facetune has you covered. Download Facetune free on the App Store or Google Play.

[Charity]

Can I come clean about something? I am definitely not someone who likes doing laundry. Yeah, I don't think there is anyone who does. Whether you put your stinky gym clothes in with your delicates, forgot a load of clothes in the washer for a few days, or haven't washed your favorite jeans in far too long, you're not alone. Luckily, Arm and Hammer Deep Clean is here to help. Arm and Hammer Deep Clean is the powerful shortcut that forgives your own shortcuts. It's made for real life stinking stains. Because it's just laundry, you shouldn't stress over it. And now you don't have to. From the number one liquid detergent brand that tackles more loads than any other. Come clean with arm and hammer. Deep clean number one claim based on total wash loads sold.

[Podcast Host (Ad Read)]

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