New Year, New YOU | Golden Hour

Summary

Bachelor Happy Hour: “New Year, New YOU | Golden Hour”

Hosts: Kathy and Susan
Date: January 14, 2026
Podcast: Bachelor Happy Hour (iHeartPodcasts and Warner Bros)

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Episode Overview

This “Golden Hour” episode of Bachelor Happy Hour kicks off 2026 with co-hosts Kathy and Susan answering listener questions about self-improvement, relationships, and tricky family dynamics. The conversation centers around goal-setting for the new year, boundaries in marriage and family relationships, wedding traditions, and candid confessions from listeners. The tone is lively, candid, and often humorous as the hosts share personal experiences alongside practical advice.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. New Year, New You: Fitness & Wellness in Midlife

[03:41–10:58]

• Listener Chris (56) asks for advice on building strength, stretching routines, and staying motivated, especially during menopause.
• Kathy’s core advice:
  • Don’t overdo it at first (“Don’t become a weekend warrior… start small. I would encourage you to start off walking 10 minutes.” – Kathy, 05:09)
  • Incorporate regular stretching, referencing gentle floor routines (lying on the floor, knee-to-chest, gentle twists).
  • Start basic strength training and consider a few sessions with a personal trainer.
  • Use journals to track progress.
  • Cheap or used weights are perfectly fine.
  • Consistency and commitment are key (“It's the commitment to getting out and doing something.” – Kathy, 09:54)
• Susan emphasizes slow, controlled weight movements (“She made me go so slow on the way down. And it took so much more time, but it was so much more for the muscle.” – Susan, 08:52), and highlights the importance of core exercises and balance (tai chi for balance).

Notable Quotes

• “Start small. Walk for 10 minutes. When you come back from the walk, stretch.” – Kathy (05:09)
• “Your core strength is everything. One of the things I did do … I just downloaded and joined this tai chi, and I'm going to start for balance.” – Susan (08:04)

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2. Navigating Family Boundaries: Over-involved Adult Children

[11:03–18:21, 28:29–33:49]

• Anonymous listener feels overwhelmed by the frequency and intensity of her husband’s adult daughter’s communication (calls, photos, videos, even during vacations) and is uncomfortable with the controlling environment when visiting her home. She wonders if she’s being unreasonable and how to address the issue.
• Susan’s Advice:
  • Approach with calm, jot down main points before the conversation to avoid sounding like a complainer.
  • Don’t ignore the discomfort: “I have to bite my tongue sometimes until it bleeds.” (13:20)
• Kathy’s Advice:
  • Set boundaries (“I have one word for you. Anonymous. Boundaries.” – Kathy, 14:14).
  • Recommends therapy if direct conversation isn’t enough, urging Anonymous to communicate that she is a priority to her husband.
  • “You have every right, Anonymous, to expect that your husband will put you first in his life.” – Kathy (16:35)
  • Stresses you can't change people who don't want to change; sometimes therapy is needed to reveal this is an unhealthy dynamic.
  • Men aren't mind readers—tell them what’s on your mind.
• Discussion on controlling households, the impact on marriage, and whether “too close” is grounding or detrimental.

Timestamps & Quotes

• “First of all, you are not being unreasonable.” – Kathy (14:14)
• “If he's spending more time with his kids than he is with you, that's another issue.” – Kathy (15:15)
• “Men are a lot of things … but one thing they are not is mind readers. Tell them what's on your mind and then take it from there.” – Kathy (17:43)
• “If he said no, I think it's fine, we're probably not going to make it.” – Kathy, on unwillingness to change (30:16)

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3. Should I Wear a Wedding Ring If I Don’t Like Jewelry?

[23:43–28:24]

• Elizabeth writes in, uncomfortable with wearing her engagement or wedding ring, despite her fiancé's support but facing pushback from family and friends.
• Susan: Slightly more traditional, suggests maybe wear the ring for the ceremony, but overall: “If you don't want to, you don't have to.” (24:48)
• Kathy: Strongly argues it's a personal choice and the ring is only a symbol. “It is a symbol. It is not the marriage.” (26:05) Emphasizes: "Last time I looked, you're marrying him, not your friends or your family." (24:51)
• Both agree that commitment, not rings, makes a marriage. The back-and-forth gets energetic but playful.

Quotes

• “If you don't like the symbol… Do what I did. Get your hair dyed black. That can be your symbol of marriage.” – Kathy (26:04)
• “Your marriage, your man. And don't let your friends and family tell you what to do.” – Susan (28:13)

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4. Relationship Confessions: Rapid-Fire Golden Hour

[39:23–47:32]

Kathy and Susan read and react to a series of anonymous Instagram confessions, ranging from awkward dating mishaps to staying in relationships for all the wrong reasons. Tone is both candid and playful.

Sample Confessions & Discussion:

• Scheduling two dates at the same restaurant, same night – “That's like, that could be deadly, right?” – Kathy (39:58)
• Staying with someone for their dog – “So can I just say, a lot of men… their dogs come before me, which is like I'm out the door.” – Kathy (41:03)
• Finding out about cheating through Venmo – “She was in his phone.” – Kathy (42:14)
• Breaking up via text and running into the person 20 minutes later – “That's the dating God saying you should never break up over text.” – Kathy (46:41)
• Telling someone “I love you” in a panic – “I think that happens a lot, too.” – Susan (44:59)
• Googling someone so deeply, you accidentally reference their cousin’s wedding on a date.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You have every right, Anonymous, to expect that your husband will put you first in his life.” – Kathy (16:35)
• “I have one word for you. Anonymous. Boundaries.” – Kathy (14:14)
• “It's the commitment to getting out and doing something. … It's hard work.” – Kathy, on fitness (09:54)
• “I want to know what you think about the woman whose husband's daughter blows his phone up. Seriously, I need a people poll on this one.” – Susan (47:41)
• “Marriage is about partnership and commitment. And a ring is not that.” – Kathy (27:19)
• “Don't break up over text. Do it in person.” – Kathy (46:41)

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Structure of Listener Letters

[03:56–47:32]

• Each listener email or confession is read and discussed in detail, typically including:
  • Warm, empathetic acknowledgment from both hosts.
  • One host offers initial advice, the other provides either affirmation or a contrarian (but good-natured) counterpoint.
  • Practical suggestions, references to their own experiences, and humorous asides.

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Listener Engagement

• The hosts repeatedly urge listeners to write back with updates, especially regarding the daughter/step-family boundary issue, underscoring the show's interactive, community-driven spirit.
• Susan requests: “I need a people poll on this one.” (47:41)

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Episode Tone

Conversational, supportive, and candid with frequent humor and self-deprecation. Kathy tends toward assertive, straightforward advice, while Susan is more diplomatic and nurturing, providing balance and dynamic debate.

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Key Takeaways

• Start fitness routines small; consistency and self-compassion matter most as you age.
• Boundaries are crucial in marriage and family relationships; difficult conversations are necessary for long-term happiness.
• Traditional wedding symbols are only meaningful if you want them to be.
• Listeners relate through confessions—the struggles are real and often shared.
• Open communication and self-advocacy are needed in relationships of all types.

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Timestamps of Important Segments

• 03:41–10:58 – Fitness & wellness advice for midlife and menopause.
• 11:03–18:21; 28:29–33:49 – Family/step-parenting boundary issues and relationship prioritization.
• 23:43–28:24 – To wear or not wear a wedding ring: tradition vs. personal preference.
• 39:23–47:32 – Anonymous confessions and hosts’ reactions.

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For fans of Bachelor Nation, self-improvement, and honest relationship talk, this episode delivers practical guidance, plenty of laughter, and the kind of advice you’d expect from two experienced friends: candid, heartfelt, and full of personality.

Transcript

[Susan]

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[Kathy]

Oh my gosh, it is, you know, just rolling through the first week of the new year. Loving it. It's been record warm temperatures in Austin, Texas. Who needs the beach when it can be 86 degrees in Austin, Texas in the first week of January?

[Susan]

I do because the blue water is just beautiful.

[Kathy]

Okay, rub it in, rub it in. Susan, still at the beach. All right, today Susan and I are back. We are answering some of your questions. This is one of our favorite things to do. Thanks for writing in. We're so excited to check in with you guys and dish out some adv. So I'm going to do the first one. Okay, you ready, Susan? Chris writes hi Kathy and Susan. I have selected the word strength to focus on for this year. I'm 56 and I'm really feeling like I need to focus on taking care of my body and making it strong again. Kathy, I've heard you talk about the importance of stretching and I'm wondering if you have specific stretches and strength training that you do or if you could share your protocol daily schedule on the podcast. What does working out look like when you're in menopause? I would love to know how you keep in such good shape and stay motivated. Susan, you look great too. I just know you don't like to work out as much as Kathy does. I appreciate any advice you both can provide.

[Susan]

Well, Chris, I just want to say one thing. I do stretch. That is critical because if you don't things aren't going to flow. I do.

[Kathy]

That's true. She's absolutely right. And thank you, Chris, for your lovely comments about me. Looking so great. It's a little rough in the beginning of the new year, but we're all getting back into the gym and, and getting focused on strength and training. So let me give you a couple of easy tips, Chris. First of all, don't jump. Don't become a weekend warrior, that is, don't jump into the gym and work out for an hour, an hour and a half. Because what's going to happen is you're going to tear something, hur hurt something, get so sore that you won't do it again. So start small. I would encourage you to start off walking 10 minutes. You don't have to do it marathon pace, just walk for 10 minutes. When you come back from the walk, stretch. And let me give you some easy stretches. Lying on the floor, lifting each leg individually into your chest, slowly rolling one leg over onto the other side of your body, like making an L if you will, bending at the waist and just slowly, don't be bouncing. Stretching is just that. It's not bouncing, it's slowly holding as far as you can and then letting it go. And there are tons of, of stretching exercises you can get on YouTube. There's plenty of information that you can get. The other thing that I would say to you is strength training. So you're probably, obviously, well, not obviously probably in menopause and we lose strength once we go into menopause. And so weight training, although you didn't ask that. Strength training, slash, weight training is super important. And again, I would encourage you if you have the resources available, get a trainer, work with a trainer two or three times. Get him to write out a workout for you. Do that workout for four, six weeks, not every day. Start out three days a week, that's plenty. And then go after six weeks and get a new workout again. There's so many good free workouts online. And get yourself, you can buy cheap weights at secondhand stores. You don't have to order brand new weights. The weight to does not change its weight over time. So you know, look for used weights if that's an issue and take it slow. That is my best advice. And, and then keep a journal is always a good thing. What weight you used, how long you did it for and then just build up slowly. You got anything to add to that, Susan?

[Susan]

I do. As far as the stretching, when you're flat on your back and you bring your Legs up, knees bent, you press the small of your back into the floo.

[Kathy]

Right.

[Susan]

It's a great back exercise and it's also strengthening the core, which is something that I have problems with. Yeah, because your core strength is everything. One of the things I did do and didn't want to brag, but I just downloaded and joined this tai chi, and I'm going to start for balance.

[Kathy]

Yeah, good for you.

[Susan]

Helps motivate me. And it is a little bit of strength. But.

[Kathy]

Yeah. So, Chris, the thing is, as we get older, and I'm a lot older than you are, Chris, we tend to lose balance. That's why people fall and break hips and that. So since. Right. Core strength, also balance, balance. So it's all goes together. Strength training, balance, core exercises. There's. There's a lot you can find.

[Susan]

And Kathy, do you agree with this? I worked with a trainer last year for a short time, unfortunately, because I started to travel again. But, yeah, when I was doing, like, arm curls, for instance, and your elbows are in, she made me go so slow on the way down. And it took so much more time, but it was so much more for the muscle.

[Kathy]

Right.

[Susan]

Because I used to just want two, three. No, that's not how you do it.

[Kathy]

So this is.

[Susan]

I learned something.

[Kathy]

Right. I have done weights since I was 20 years old, and so I know the proper way to lift a weight. But that's why, Chris, if you can get a trainer just one or two times, it actually will cut out a lot of the mistakes and the chance of you hurting yourself. And you're. How do I stay in such good shape, Chris? It's, it's, it's hard work.

[Susan]

She does, I do eat.

[Kathy]

I do eat.

[Susan]

Not like an Italian girl.

[Kathy]

Well, that may be. I'm not Italian, but I work. I, I make a commitment, Chris, to work out. This morning I didn't want to work out. We. We had to sit down. I had other things I had to do, but I got up early so I could go out and did. And do my walk. Did I do five miles today? No, I only had time to do four. It's, it's the commitment, I'm saying. It's the commitment to getting out and doing something. But you know what.

[Susan]

And how often do you lift weights, Kathy? How many times a week?

[Kathy]

Three times a week?

[Susan]

Three times?

[Kathy]

Two to three.

[Susan]

Every day.

[Kathy]

I walk, I walk, I walk. I would say nine days out of 10. So not, you know, I'll skip a day once in a while, but Chris let us know. I would Love to hear back from you. You know, the computer is your friend, the Internet is your friend. Look up some. Look up some exercises. Take your time, but just commit to doing it. 10 minutes. You will feel better. You will sleep better. Let us know how it goes for you. And yay. I'm glad I have someone who wants to get in shape for 20. Yeah.

[Susan]

Yeah. Thanks for writing in, Chris. We wish you the best. Let us know your progress.

[Kathy]

Yeah, perfect.

[Susan]

All right, the next one is from Anonymous. First, thank you for talking about the stuff that other podcasts don't. My question is about my husband's adult daughter. She is a married mother of four kids under the age of 10 and lives out of state. The issue is she calls him all the time with reports of rashes, who ate all their dinner, the weather and other useless trivia. She also texts hourly with videos and photos of her baking skills, every activity, clips of every sports game where she is screaming in the background. Anything you can think of, she's doing. This happens constantly when my husband and I are on vacation or at an outing. The contact doubled when we were on a Europe trip. Ding at dinner. Ding. At 2am he feels an obligation to text back. If he doesn't respond in 10 minutes, she calls. I love that they are so close but I at times feel like she is in our marriage. I have adult children that I am very close to but I don't feel a need for more than once a day check in. We are both healthy and active so there is no need for over concern. He visits them six to seven times a year and sometimes I go along. This past year I have made excuses as to not go because I am starting to feel uncomfortable as their home is a very controlling household. There are, they are over. There are over the top rules, schedules and harsh punishments. Punishments that make me cringe. Not sure how I bring it up to him or am I being unreasonable? I have been dealing with this for over a year.

[Kathy]

Whoa.

[Susan]

I feel your pain.

[Kathy]

You want to take a stab at it because this is so easy for me.

[Susan]

Oh my God. Yes I know it is for you but not for me. I would definitely have to bring it up. I would try to calm myself first and write down the important things so you're not bluttering along and you're starting to sound like a whining complaining. That's one of my things that I do. I go on and on, just get the facts out that does it have to be like this? And the harsh punishments that make you cringe. I totally get That I have to bite my tongue sometimes until it bleeds. So I would truly have a conversation with him. And if he's that in love with you and you are with him and he wants this to work, there is no reason that she would have to do it that many times in a day, especially when you're on holiday.

[Kathy]

Kathy, I have one word. Usually I'm the one running at the mouth. And you, I have one word for you. Anonymous Boundaries. First of all, you are not being unreasonable.

[Susan]

Not at all.

[Kathy]

Secondly, all the examples you gave, one is worse than the next. I think. Susan, I agree on that. That's just horrible. However, if your husband, you said that he feels that he must respond.

[Susan]

I wonder.

[Kathy]

Kathy, I don't care. I don't care where the mother is. He feels an obligation to text back. The question you have to ask him is why? Because they are adult children. And this to me is beginning. I don't want to sound overly dramatic, Anonymous. But you're not spending time with him. You're not going on the trips with him to see his family, which is okay. I mean, that's all right. You can go once or twice of the six times he goes a year. However, if he's spending more time with his kids than he is with you, that's another issue. You need to. I would encourage you again, I'm not a therapist, but I would encourage you guys to get into therapy because he needs to learn that you are his priority and that he can love his children. But they are adults and they get to live their lives. He. They doesn't mean that he needs to hear every dot and dash of their lives. So I would encourage you to get some help because clearly if you haven't brought. Well, first of all, Susan's right. Bring it up to him first.

[Susan]

See if he's know what you're going to say. Yeah, yeah. Just say, kathy, I wonder, is there not a mom? Maybe she passed. That's why she depends solely on the dad.

[Kathy]

I don't care.

[Susan]

But there's a fine line. And what about her husband, the girl's husband? Talk to him. Your dad. You don't need to talk to him 20 times a day.

[Kathy]

She is a married mother of four kids. She is an adult. I don't care if there's a mother.

[Susan]

A stepmother, usually they call the mom for these things.

[Kathy]

I But see, I the mom. This. You could turn this whole question around. It could be the husband writing in that she calls her mom. You see, that's still wrong. It's wrong. It is wrong. You have every right, Anonymous, to expect that. That your husband will put you first in his life. That isn't to say he won't chat with his kids occasionally, once a day, even send them gifts. I think, you know, once a day is great.

[Susan]

And. And if something exciting is happening and she shoots over the video, okay, great. But it's not every day, and it's.

[Kathy]

Not more than once a day, and it's not all these things. I think this is something Anonymous that you. You should try to talk to him about. But I'm guessing you might need to have some counseling here with your husband. And like I said, I'm not a therapist, but because he might be blind.

[Susan]

To the fact that you're bothered by it, he. Someone has to bring it to his attention, and that's the first step.

[Kathy]

Well, she says she's been dealing with it for over a year.

[Susan]

Yes, but she hasn't said anything.

[Kathy]

You haven't said anything, so.

[Susan]

Right.

[Kathy]

You know, I think. I think you listen, Anonymous. Men are a lot of things clueless. One things that. Well, they may be clueless, but one thing they are not is mind readers. So tell them what's on your mind and then take it from there and see what other steps you might need to take. And let us start. Let us know.

[Susan]

I wish you luck, baby, because I get it.

[Kathy]

I love you. I love. Susan says start softly. I'd be in there ranting. All right, let's move on. But let us know, Anonymous. Seriously, we wish the best for you.

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[Kathy]

Elizabeth writes hi Kathy and Susan. You guys give such good advice. Well thank you Elizabeth. Hoping you have something good for me. I am engaged in getting married soon. I have an engagement ring but I never wear it because I just don't like wearing jewelry. Well, I'm not even going to read on Elizabeth. Send it to me. I'll be happy to wear it for you. Okay, I don't think that's her question though. All right. I also don't want to feel like I have to wear a wedding ring. It's nothing personal, I just am not a jewelry girl. My fiance does not have any problem with this, but here we go. But my family and friends seem to think it's weird and disrespectful to marriage. Is it really that big of a deal? What says you Susan?

[Susan]

I mean first of all, why did you let him waste his money on a diamond if you don't like jewelry, a simple band would have been good too, right? But there's something to be said when you're married.

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[Susan]

I. I like the idea of wearing a ring that's.

[Kathy]

You do? Yeah, I think. Okay, let me.

[Susan]

But it's to each his own. If you don't want to, you don't have to.

[Kathy]

That's where I am. Hey, Susan. And as far as your friends are concerned, Elizabeth and your family, last time I looked, you're marrying him, not your friends or your family. So there's that. But here's what I would say there. We all know lots of men and women who wear wedding rings and diamond rings with their wedding rings, who cheat on their husbands, cheat on their wives. So the ring, while it is a symbol of unity and commitment, we all know that it. It doesn't always turn out that way. Right? So I would say, Elizabeth, you seem like a woman who is looking forward to being married and loves the idea of marriage. And I don't hear anything here that you're not sure you want to marry the guy. So as far as I'm concerned, if you are in a committed relationship and you are partners in this marriage, I don't care if you wear a. A straw wrapped around your finger, a diamond ring or no ring at all. It's a. It's a symbol. It is not the marriage. It is a symbol. If you don't like the symbol.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Right.

[Kathy]

You know, do what I did. Get your hair dyed black. That can be your symbol of marriage.

[Susan]

No, Elizabeth, just do one thing for everyone. When you do say your vows, wear the ring. If you don't want to wear it afterwards, you don't have to. I don't care what your family.

[Kathy]

Why does she have to wear it?

[Susan]

It's part of the ceremony.

[Kathy]

It doesn't have to be.

[Susan]

It's a symbol that they each put on that the wearer is.

[Kathy]

That's. That's just. Hey, you and I can argue this all day long. There's nothing.

[Susan]

You can have your hands tied in the symbol as. That's also.

[Kathy]

They can do that. I know you do, but there's no law that says you have to put a wedding ring on for your wedding. You can. You don't have to say anything. You don't have to say you are going to honor and all that. You don't have to do any of those things.

[Susan]

She's what I got out of.

[Kathy]

You need a marriage license.

[Susan]

Like, he just doesn't like wearing jewelry. But appease everybody. For the ceremony, you wear it. People look at it. And when you're done, you're on your own.

[Kathy]

If you want to wear you. And they are so different.

[Susan]

A lot of men don't wear wedding babies because of their work, where they're.

[Kathy]

Or they just don't like wearing them.

[Susan]

Sometimes they don't.

[Kathy]

So who cares? You and I are here we are our first fight of 2026.

[Susan]

This is not a fight.

[Kathy]

No, you don't send our first disagreement. You do not have to wear a ring at the ceremony. Elizabeth, you don't have to wear the diamond at the ceremony. You don't have to do anything with it. You can keep it if you have children, see if they want it someday. I believe marriage is. Is not about symbols. Marriage is about partnership and commitment. And a ring. And a ring is not that. So if you don't want to wear it, don't wear it. It's not a big deal. Don't get married in it if you don't want to. Don't have rings. Don't do it. If you don't want it, don't do it.

[Susan]

Tell however he has the ring.

[Kathy]

Well, she has the diamond ring. She has the diamond ring. She. But she does not have a wedding ring. For the second time. You don't want money. Okay? Susan says where to the ceremony. Because Susan performs ceremonies and wants that.

[Susan]

And then you could put it in the safe and, you know, whatever. It's fine. It's her.

[Kathy]

All I can say is your life.

[Susan]

Your marriage, your man.

[Kathy]

And don't let your friends and family tell you what to do. It's your day, it's your marriage, it's your life. And may I also say, I wish I had Elizabeth's problem. Hey, would you wait if I called you up? Wait if I called you up and said, susan, I've got the most gorgeous diamond ring from whoever and I don't want to wear it. I don't want to wear.

[Susan]

Give it to me Gap. I'll wear it or have it made into something else. But she doesn't like jewelry at all. But let's reflect for a second on the last three notes that we receive the first one 100. It's about getting healthy. It's about stretching, lifting weights, doing good for yourself. Right?

[Kathy]

And it's. And it is a perfect time for everyone. You and I think about it. I hope our new start.

[Susan]

Yes.

[Kathy]

Are thinking how they can make their lives. So I love that Chris wrote in because that shows that people. She hopefully symbolizes a lot of People who are thinking about making their lives better. We. I know you and I are trying to.

[Susan]

And then the one that's sticking in my crawl is. It's those kids, that daughter. I want to call her Kathy. Seriously. Wait.

[Kathy]

What should you do, Susan? You know me so well.

[Susan]

She would just like that, and it's over. You just, boom. I'm not accepting it right.

[Kathy]

I would say to him, forget it. You're not doing this. You're not doing this. You can. You can choose. So you.

[Susan]

You would give him an ultimatum?

[Kathy]

Not. Not at the beginning. I would say. I would start with tiny steps. You're turning your phone off at night and you're going to tell her. You are going to have the conversation. Do you want to be with me? This is the conversation I would have. Do you? Let's call him. John. John.

[Susan]

Okay.

[Kathy]

Do you want to be with me? Do you love me? Because I love you and I love our life together. What I don't love is feeling like your daughter and her children are in our marriage. It's excessive. So are you willing to have a conversation with her? Do you think it's excessive? Would be my first question. If he said no, I think it's fine. We're probably not going to make it. If he thinks that's normal, we're done.

[Susan]

I mean, seriously, that's my fear. Does he think that's normal?

[Kathy]

Well, but if he does, you're not going to change him if he doesn't want to change. That's the thing that we. Susan, pay attention. We don't change people. We accept people for who they are, and we either stick around or we take a hike.

[Susan]

And what. What happens is, is it okay with you who they are? Of course you accept anybody for who they are, but when it involves you, yes. Are you okay with who they are?

[Kathy]

And I think Anonymous is nervous maybe that he is okay with her daughter, his daughter contacting her 64 times a day. And she does. I think that's why she hasn't had the conversation.

[Susan]

She's not sure how I bring it up to him. Well, we're going to tell you a couple different ways that you're going to bring it up. The first one for me is when you're about to take a trip, whether you're in Europe or you're down the street at a hotel. I don't care where you are, what country you're at. You have that conversation before you leave, sweetie. Let your daughter know we're going on holiday, and you will not be answering Every single solitary text message. It's too much.

[Kathy]

I disagree with you because you. Because of what I said to you earlier.

[Dr. Jake Goodman]

He.

[Kathy]

This is you being control person. He has to not want it. You cannot legislate change.

[Susan]

You can't make him not want it.

[Kathy]

You.

[Susan]

They've got to make some kind of an arrangement.

[Kathy]

No, no, no. This is what I'm saying. She. Anonymous cannot legislate and tell her husband. You're going to tell your daughter this. This A, B and C. That's why I said the first question Anonymous needs to ask him is, are you willing to make a change? I think this is excessive. Are you willing to make changes? Well, yes.

[Susan]

Yes, of course.

[Kathy]

That.

[Susan]

You have to have the conversation, but she's going to be a little bit lenient because she's in love with her husband. Husband. She's saying, am I being unreasonable? You're not being unreasonable. You need that conversation like we talked about, And a reminder before you go on a trip.

[Kathy]

But I'm saying. I don't think you're hearing me. You're saying Anonymous needs to tell him. I'm saying the. No, that's. That's controlling his life. What?

[Susan]

Tell him that it upsets her and I'm telling him how to do it.

[Kathy]

Well, yes, you did. You said tell her to tell the daughter.

[Susan]

Tell the daughter we are going on vacation. You will not be answering that.

[Kathy]

That's telling him how to do it. I'm saying. I'm saying you can't tell a man, your partner and have a good outcome if he doesn't want to change it.

[Susan]

So after their conversation, the beginning conversation that we both agreed upon.

[Kathy]

Yeah. I'm saying if he isn't willing, I would try therapy. After you approach, after you broach it with him. Try couples therapy and see if you can get some leeway. But this, for me, what do you.

[Susan]

Think that would actually do, Kathy? Couples therapy.

[Kathy]

See if a therapist could get him to see how unrealistic and frankly, insane this kind of behavior is.

[Susan]

Just call us.

[Kathy]

I got. I gotta. I've got a couple others that I want to go.

[Dr. Jake Goodman]

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[Susan]

Cindy Crawford and I'm the founder of meaningful beauty.

[Kathy]

When Dr. Sabah and I decided to.

[Susan]

Do a skincare line together, he said to me, we are going to give women meaningful beauty. And I said, that's exactly right. We want to give women meaningful beauty. Which means each and every product is meaningful. It has a reason to exist. It's efficacious. You're going to get results and then.

[Kathy]

You just go out and live your life. Meaningful Beauty Confidence is beautiful.

[Susan]

Learn more@meaningful beauty.com.

[Kathy]

Susan do you remember when we did in one of our episodes about anonymous confessions and we we read some of them? We didn't have time to do them. All right, we've got a few more here. Let's do another round of anonymous confection.

[Susan]

All right.

[Kathy]

And these come from Instagram, so these really happen. Happened. Okay. I once dated two people at the same time and accidentally scheduled dates at the same restaurant at this on the same night.

[Susan]

What do you think I cancel both?

[Kathy]

I, I don't know. I mean that would, I mean I've done, I've scheduled two dates before, but not at the same restaurant at this on the same night at the same time like that. Whoever, you know, Instagram person. That is an amazing confession. I think you need to get a little black book bells and chimes on your cell phone, do something. Because that's like that, that could be deadly, right? Have you ever done that?

[Susan]

I couldn't do it.

[Kathy]

No, you've never done. Have you ever had two dates in one day?

[Susan]

No. Well, yes, but two meetings in one day, not dates. Like when I was on social media dating, I would go meet somebody for a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and I did one in the afternoon, one in the evening one time. But that, yeah.

[Kathy]

All right, all right, what about this one? I stayed in a relationship way longer than I should have because I liked his dog more than him.

[Susan]

That's terrible.

[Kathy]

So can I just say, a lot of men. I've talked to you about this, Susan. They have dogs and their dogs come before me, which is like I'm out the door. I don't think I could you stay in a relationship where you liked.

[Susan]

Because I like the dog.

[Kathy]

Well, or the, or their daughter or something. You know, you like the kid. Or the.

[Susan]

How about I told my friends and family we broke up mutually when I was very much dumped.

[Kathy]

I think a lot of people do that.

[Susan]

That, yeah. To save yourself.

[Kathy]

I mean, I think a lot. I, I, I, you know, in our, in my mid year now, it's usually we.

[Susan]

Not me, I be like, dump my ass.

[Kathy]

I think people, I think people in younger. Wait, younger people are not worried about it. They're going to say he dumped me. I, I, I do. I, I think for the most part. Yeah, of course.

[Susan]

You I found out my boyfriend was cheating from his Vemo transactions with a girl.

[Kathy]

You know what you say to that? I can say, Tell you what I say from that. She was in his phone. She was in his phone.

[Susan]

Yes, she was.

[Kathy]

So, so that to that young lady, I would say no.

[Susan]

Sometimes Venmo. No, no, no, no, no. She didn't have to be on his phone. Venmo shows unless you hit private. I see all kinds of people who.

[Kathy]

Paying people oh, okay.

[Susan]

I know that for a fact.

[Kathy]

That's public. All right, how about this one? I Google this one. See the people.

[Susan]

Wait, no, I want to know what would you do with that if you saw that he was the same girl over and over? That, that. But wait, why would he be giving her money?

[Kathy]

You know what I would do? I would ask him, hey, I saw 84 transaction transactions for 1095. You know, is. Was it a cheap date or, you know, I would ask him, what is going on?

[Susan]

You be venmoing. Why would he be venmoing?

[Kathy]

It may. You know what it might be. Completely. In a sense, it might.

[Susan]

She says, I found out he was cheating through.

[Kathy]

No, no, no. She's saying, because he's sending money. So she's talking. I think this person from Instagram cheating means he's having contact with a girl. It might be his barber. Might be a female. It might be a dog walker. You know, who knows? But I would ask. You ask me. I would ask. All right, this happened. This. I've known a lot of people. I stayed with someone because we'd already booked a trip together.

[Susan]

Yeah.

[Kathy]

I've actually, I've actually known people who did that, who booked a trip together.

[Susan]

Even though in your heart it was over.

[Kathy]

Yeah, yeah. So. God, that, that would be a lousy trip. Okay, here, go ahead. You have one.

[Susan]

Yeah, Yeah. I once broke up with someone and then immediately hooked up with their friend. No.

[Kathy]

Well, that's, that's bad code. You know, that's just not. Yeah, I, I, I, I don't think I would be doing that. I'm kind of speechless on that one. Yeah, I mean, you know what? That gets down to talking about what kind of integrity you have. You know, that's like, that's just bad.

[Susan]

What about I told someone I love them back at a pure panic, even though I wasn't in love yet?

[Kathy]

I think that happens a lot, too.

[Susan]

I haven't done it, like, put on the spot or something.

[Kathy]

I mean, I feel like. Like, I think so. I don't know. How can I answer? I think that sometimes maybe people are afraid of losing the person before they know whether they want them in their life or not. So they say, I'm in love. I don't know. I haven't done it, but I, I feel sorry for people who get themselves in these fixes. It's hard to get out of. How about this one? I googled I might have been guilty of this a few times. I googled my date deeply that I knew his cousin's wedding location before we met and accidentally let it slip on the date. I've never done that, but I have googled my dates.

[Susan]

Oh, yes, you have.

[Kathy]

And found out some very interesting things I might answer.

[Susan]

Oh, God.

[Kathy]

Wait, have you ever done that? Have you ever done that? Google today?

[Susan]

I think I've asked you to Google somebody before. But that's about.

[Kathy]

Wait, I have to tell you, I have a friend. I'm going to be very, very secretive here. I have a friend who has acts. Oh, maybe shouldn't say this. Never mind. Nobody. They'll say nobody. Let's just say I have access.

[Susan]

Okay? I broke up with someone via text and then ran into them 20 minutes later. That sucks.

[Kathy]

Let me think, let me think.

[Susan]

Just sucks.

[Dr. Jake Goodman]

You.

[Susan]

You broke up with them via text. Okay? Then you run into them.

[Kathy]

Well, you know what? You know what that is? That's the dating God saying you should never break up over text. That's what that's saying. Don't break up over text. Do it in person. And then when you bump into them, you can say, can we just be friends? Okay, wait, let's. Can you make from that? Wait, I want to make up one. That would be so crazy. I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna come up with one. I can't do it it right now, but I am definitely going to come up with one that I would have put on my Instagram.

[Susan]

Your best one ever was on your show, Kathy, when you said, I once slept with another man while my husband was sleeping.

[Kathy]

I didn't say husband. I said partner. Anyway, yeah, that was. That was one of my fighter moments. All right, well.

[Susan]

All right, well, that was a lot of fun, and thank you so much to all our listeners. We hope you enjoyed it and got a kick out of it.

[Kathy]

Like, you know, I would love.

[Susan]

I'm sure.

[Dr. Jake Goodman]

Go.

[Kathy]

We gotta go. But I would love to just sit on Instagram and find out some more embarrassing moments for people.

[Susan]

No, seriously, though, to all our listeners, and a lot of you, write me, and I do appreciate it. I want to know what you think about the woman whose husband's daughter blows his phone up. Seriously, I need a people poll on this one. Like, let us.

[Kathy]

Let me just tell you something. This is gonna. This is gonna be in Susan's mind. We're gonna finish this podcast. She's gonna call me and say, can you. I already know where this is going.

[Susan]

I told you.

[Kathy]

Everybody agrees. That's right. Well, in the meantime, be sure to follow Bachelor Happier Hour as we have new episodes coming out every week and you don't want to miss even one.

[Susan]

Absolutely not. And make sure to listen to Bachelor Happy Hours golden hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to your podcast. And until next time, Kathy and I signing off.

[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Susan]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Susan]

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