Nothing Is Better Than Something | Golden Hour

Summary

Bachelor Happy Hour | Golden Hour

Episode: Nothing Is Better Than Something
Date: January 30, 2026
Hosts: Kathy & Susan

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Episode Overview

In this episode of the official “Bachelor Nation” podcast’s “Golden Hour,” hosts Kathy and Susan tackle a topic close to many hearts: why women stay in unsatisfying or “terrible” relationships, the shifts in expectations across generations, and how self-esteem and confidence play essential roles in dating decisions. With their signature witty rapport, the pair candidly dissect listener-submitted dilemmas—from awkward breakups to friend drama and “revenge” antics—underscoring lessons about self-worth and personal boundaries.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

I. Catching Up and Ice-Breaker Stories

[03:29–06:25]

• The episode opens with light banter about winter weather and Kathy’s celebrity moment in Palm Springs, where she accidentally skipped out on a restaurant check after staff fawned over her.
  • Kathy: “They’re sending over free appetizers, free dessert, asking for pictures... We get to the car, and I said, ‘Well, thank you so much for dinner’. And he goes, ‘You didn’t pay. I didn’t pay’. We were dying laughing the whole way.” (05:38)

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II. Why Do Women Put Up with “Terrible” Male Partners?

[06:25–13:03]

• Generational Shifts:

  • “Women put up with a lot…as we age, we put up with less. Not just with men—with anybody, really.” (Susan, 06:47–07:08)
  • Discussion about parental roles in previous generations versus today; more equitable splits in household labor and expectations.
  • Susan shares her son’s example of doing his own laundry, noting progress in gender roles.

• Confidence and Fear of Loneliness:

  • Kathy argues, “I think women put up with terrible male partners in relationships because they’re afraid that’s all they can get. They don’t have the confidence.” (08:48–09:09)
  • Both note that many women feel “something is better than nothing,” accepting subpar treatment out of fear of being alone.

• What Defines a “Terrible” Partner?

  • Ranges from disrespect to lack of contribution in daily life, to outright abuse—though both agree abuse is utterly intolerable.
  • Kathy describes a past scenario: a man earning much more than his partner but expecting her to split expenses equally. She calls that a “terrible” partner.

• Modern Dating and Self-Respect:

  • Kathy: “I would rather be alone than have a terrible partner.” (09:23)
  • Susan: “A man that is not polite or is rude to anybody…that’s just—I would never tolerate it.” (12:12)

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III. Listener Questions: “Fan Mail”

[17:42–32:04]

1. Dilemma: Should I have told my friend to dump her boyfriend?

[17:49–24:15]

• Listener’s best friend finds her boyfriend using ChatGPT to search “how to break up with your long-term girlfriend”—yet stays with him.
• Listener (Anonymous) told her to dump him; now friend is “icing” her out.
• Susan is baffled: “What is wrong with that girl that she’s not gonna bring it up?” (19:27)
• Kathy reflects on the hard lesson: “I don’t give you my opinion unless you ask…In 2026 I’m going to go, ‘Oh, that really sucks.’ …But I’m not going to say to you, ‘dump his ass.’ Old Kathy would have.” (20:14–20:49)
• BOTH agree the friend is staying because “something is better than nothing,” circling back to the main theme.
• Advice: Apologize for giving unsolicited advice and offer support. Accept that the friend isn’t ready to act.
  • “Tell her you love her, you’re her friend, and you’re here to listen.” (Susan, 23:27)

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2. Breakup Revenge: Clothes on Fire

[24:16–32:04]

• Listener breaks up with boyfriend after discovering continued cheating; after helping him with legal trouble (including bail and lawyering), she burns his clothes in a fountain, cancels his lawyer, and tells his parents.
• Kathy and Susan split on their verdicts:
  • Kathy: “Grow up. You went so far over the cliff, Anonymous, that you’re going to be hang-gliding for 20 hours to get to ground.” (30:02)
  • Susan: “I think it’s funny…A woman scorned, man. Don’t cheat on me, asshole. After all the things I did for you…Bravo.” (29:19–29:21)
• Debate whether “breakup revenge” is ever justified.
  • Kathy: “Breakup revenge should not even be a thing.”
  • Susan (humorously): “I definitely would’ve coaxed that text that was coming in, said, ‘Come now, sweetheart.’ And we’d both be sitting there when he walked in.”

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IV. Rapid Fire Advice: Relationship Scenarios

[36:59–48:06]

A series of mini-advice prompts—all centering around personal boundaries, modern dating behaviors, and respecting oneself:

• Screenshots of Friends on Phone:
  • Kathy: “If you see on [your partner’s] phone a bunch of pictures of some other girl…that’s a little weird.” (38:19)
• Venmoing an Ex for Coffee:
  • Kathy: “Lose the guy.”
  • Susan: “It’s weird. Just offload him.”
• Partner Doesn’t Believe in Relationship Labels after 6 Months:
  • “If you don’t want a label, don’t put a label on it. I don’t care.” (Kathy, 40:00)
• Liking Old Bikini Pics at 2am:
  • Kathy: “Why are you checking his phone? You don’t trust him.” (40:30)
• Hidden Folders with “Receipts”:
  • Both: “Get off his phone and dump him to the curb.” (42:36)
• Introduced as “My Friend” After Dating:
  • Susan: “Well, they are friends… I’ve said that and I’ve been called on it too.” (43:26)
• Partner Claims Privacy But Posts Everything Else:
  • “There’s a reason they’re hiding you.” (Kathy, 44:22)
• Deleting Texts as You Walk In:
  • Susan: “No, they’re not deleted. They’re there for 30 days. Go look.” (45:15)
  • Kathy: “If your partner is cheating, you’ll find out…Not everything is cheating.” (45:24)
• Partner Follows 300+ “Thirst Traps,” Never Compliments Partner:
  • Kathy: “Show him the door.” (47:05)
  • Susan: “Maybe that’s just what turns him on. But if he’s never complimenting you, there’s a bigger issue.”
• Moving in without Ever Arguing:
  • Kathy: “Move in. You’re going to have your first argument very soon.” (48:17)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “As we age, we put up with less.” — Susan (07:05)
• “I think women put up with terrible male partners… because they’re afraid that’s all they can get.” — Kathy (09:09)
• “I would rather be alone than have a terrible partner.” — Kathy (09:23)
• “Tell her you love her, you’re her friend, and you’re here to listen.” — Susan, on friendship advice (23:27)
• “Grow up. You went so far over the cliff, Anonymous, that you’re going to be hang-gliding for 20 hours to get to ground.” — Kathy (30:02)
• “A woman scorned, man. Don’t cheat on me, asshole.” — Susan (29:21)
• “These women do not trust themselves. They don’t have enough self-confidence… They post bail, get lawyers, try to fix things… Women need to stop being fixers.” — Kathy (48:30)
• “You are worth more. If you believe you’re worth more, you have to take action.” — Kathy (49:05–49:10)
• “I’m now depressed because I’m never going to have a date ever again.” — Kathy, laughing at her high standards (49:19)

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Tone & Closing Thoughts

• The conversation is candid and energetic, laced with humor but grounded in practical, hard-earned wisdom.
• Kathy often takes a tough-love, “you deserve better” stance while Susan offers a blend of pragmatism and supportive zaniness (especially on the breakup revenge story).
• Emphasis throughout is on self-respect, self-sufficiency, and breaking the habit of accepting less than one deserves.
• Listeners are encouraged to send in their own stories and recognize that, on this show, there’s room for more than one perspective—even if it leads to spirited disagreement.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Icebreaker & Palm Springs Story: [03:29–06:25]
• Main Topic—Why Do Women Put Up with “Terrible” Partners?: [06:25–13:03]
• Listener Dilemmas:
  • ChatGPT Breakup Scenario: [17:49–24:15]
  • Burning Clothes Revenge: [24:16–32:04]
• Rapid Fire Advice: [36:59–48:06]
• Summation & Self-Esteem Message: [48:27–49:25]

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For listeners:
If you’re grappling with relationship red flags, friend drama, or your own self-worth, there’s honest solidarity (and plenty of laughs) to be found in this Golden Hour. As Kathy says: “Take responsibility for yourself and your own happiness—and don’t deny yourself.”

Transcript

[Narrator/Announcer]

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[Kathy]

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[Bowen Yang]

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[Kathy]

Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thank you so much for joining us today and we are so excited to be back. Susan how are you today, you little snow bunny? How's it going?

[Susan]

I'm telling you what I'm sorry if that's not a workout. Shoveling 8, 9, 10 inches of snow.

[Kathy]

And it's a workout.

[Susan]

And when it was coming down yesterday or Sunday, yes, it wasn't bad. But then it got coated with ice sleet.

[Kathy]

So I was picking up boulders of.

[Susan]

Ice, like throwing them across the road. My back is killing.

[Kathy]

Sorry. Get some vodka. You'll be fine. So I have to tell you, you know, I went to La Quinta to visit a friend. Came. Two things I have to tell you. One, this whole country has pretty much had this storm. I'm stuck with my daughters because, you know, I live in the hills and it's all ice. It's barely above freezing. You can't. There's cars in the ditches everywhere because we don't have plows, we don't have salt, except the highways, so you literally wait for it to melt. So I'm cool in my heels at my daughter's house, but I just have to tell you the funniest thing. So I went to visit this friend in La Quinta and he had great stuff planned. We did the tram in Palm Springs. Beautiful views. We did just lots of fun things. One night, though, he took me to the Purple Room, which is in Palm Springs, and it's where the Rat Pack used to sing. And as soon as we walked in, he doesn't like it when people recognize me. He's just a friend, by the way, not a date. He doesn't like it. Well, as soon as I walked in, the hostess almost dropped. Then the mater de drop. It was not good. They all like, oh, my God, you're here. So he was having a fit. He was having a fit. So we sit down, we order dinner. They're sending over free appetizers. They sent over free dessert. They're asking for pictures. So we sit, we drink, we get up to leave, and. And we get to the car, and I said to him, well, thank you so much for dinner. And he looks at me, goes, you didn't pay. And I went, I didn't pay. You didn't pay? And he goes, I didn't pay. I said, are you serious? We walk back, like, four blocks to the restaurant. We walk in, the server says to me, I've been looking for you.

[Susan]

Oh, my God.

[Kathy]

I was like, I am so sorry. Like, can you imagine? They've made this big to do of us, and then it looks like we're skipping out unpaid.

[Susan]

Wait, can you imagine if you didn't thank him for dinner? Like, what is wrong him. He should know to pay. He just assumed you were paying.

[Kathy]

You know, I took him out for dinner once while I was there. I don't know. I don't know what he was thinking, but it was the funniest thing. I didn't pay. You didn't pay. And we get back there, could not stop laughing. Susan could not stop laughing.

[Susan]

I thought you were going to tell me they comped the whole thing because they were sending appetizers.

[Kathy]

Well, they were going to have to comp it, but, I mean, they had sent over drink. I mean, they did more than their fair share. But anyway, I had to tell you that I was. I was dying laughing the whole way.

[Susan]

All right, so today, Kathy, we're going to have a little fun. We recently did an episode where we asked each other, what's something you're tired of seeing women put up with in relationships? Well, today we're dedicating an entire episode to that concept. Remember saying that? Like, we could talk all day about.

[Kathy]

I was going to say, it's not just. It's not just one thing. I mean, women put up with a lot. I think men sometimes do, too, but I think women put up with more. Do you agree?

[Susan]

I do agree, but I feel as if as we age, we put up with less.

[Kathy]

Oh, that is for damn sure.

[Susan]

Not just with men, with anybody, really.

[Kathy]

All right, let's get started. We're going to get started with the question of the day. I can hardly wait for this episode, I'm going to start us off. Okay. Why do you think women put up with such terrible male partners in relationships? And have you noticed a difference in women today versus when you were growing up? Or does this seem to transcend generations? All right, what do you think?

[Susan]

It's a huge difference. Huge. Because we came from our parents. Right. Our parents were. You know, I don't dare say this, but I'm going to like the. The mom. Most moms didn't work. They were home raising the kids, cleaning the house, doing all the chores, cooking all the meals, you know, taking care of everybody. And then our generation, we were taught to be our own person, make our own money. And now I look at my son and his wife. I think I've mentioned this before. It might have been on this, at that episode that he does his own laundry. I was like.

[Kathy]

So I think you've hit on the second part of this question is what we're talking about right now. And that is the change. The change. And that is because women. More women have careers, and so they're not staying home doing everything. The chores are split more evenly. The grocery shopping, the cooking, the child care. I know in my daughter and my son, who both have children, they split it with their spouses. They do. They split the. They do their own laundries.

[Susan]

They do as they should.

[Kathy]

Right? They do. I agree. I don't think I. So I think that is the biggest difference. But why. I love the first part of this question. Because I think women put up with terrible male partners in relationships because they're afraid that's all they can get.

[Susan]

That's right.

[Kathy]

They don't have the confidence. And they found.

[Susan]

And you're gonna have to take all the bad that comes with him because he supposedly loves you.

[Kathy]

Right.

[Susan]

I feel like he didn't have the proper training.

[Kathy]

Well, or. Or that's just who he is. I. I don't know about you. I. And I've said this before, I would rather be alone than have a terrible partner. There's just. I would.

[Susan]

And what. What is your definition of, like, where's your line? First of all, anybody abusive. That just goes without saying.

[Kathy]

Well, again, at my age, it's going to look. It's going to look very different. I am not going to date a man who is not a gentleman, who is not opening the doors for me, who's not going to share my life, who's not financially stable, all those things. I'm not doing it. I'd rather be alone. Now, a terrible male partner. Like you just said, that's a loaded word. If he's abusive, that's beyond. Exactly. That's beyond terrible. But I have known. We had this a long time ago. Susan, do you remember it was a young woman who was living with her partner and he earns way more than she does and he kept pay half. Remember that? That would be a terrible male part partner expecting her to contribute half when he sets the standard of living and she can't afford it. I think that's a terrible male partner. I think a terrible male partner with the Internet. I think a lot of guys are checking out what else is on the Internet and girls are checking their phones because they, you know, I don't know. Why do you think they put up with.

[Susan]

I think a terrible partner is somebody that doesn't want to pitch in, in the household duties. Taking out the trash, cutting the lawn, like when want to be involved. Like that's a no go. And then sloppy people. You know how I am.

[Kathy]

Yes, but you're saying like men should take out the trash. You're defining male roles. No, I take out the trash when my husband was alive. I want him. If I've got a partner and you're younger, change the diapers, do the dishes, go grocery shopping, clean the toilet. You know, it's not sexist. I'm talking about. I'm talking about a terrible male partner who. It doesn't treat a woman with respect who's shopping on the Internet for another partner and for some oddball reason they.

[Susan]

Stick around and you're shopping on the Internet. That's a.

[Kathy]

We didn't even say they're married. A male partner, they don't even have to be married. But why are you sticking around? That would be my question. And I don't know, but I think it's. Women have a lack of self confidence. I know, I hear from a lot of women, you know, he's not great, but have you looked to see what else is out there? So I might as well stick with this. Oh, I think it's really.

[Susan]

I mean, there's, there's got to be a line where there's only so much you can deal with. Like you said, a man that is not polite or is rude to anybody, whether it's your server in a restaurant or anything, that's just. I would never tolerate it. Never. You know what, it's embarrassing to you. Like you didn't even do anything. And if you're with somebody, that. That's rude.

[Kathy]

Yeah, I think, I think everyone's got a different idea of what a terrible male partner is. I think you hit it on the head at the beginning of this question. You and I put up with a lot less at our age than our parents, Right? Yeah. And then young, we do that. And we also put up with a lot less than younger. Yeah, people do.

[Susan]

Young kids.

[Kathy]

Yeah. I mean, they don't have to, so, you know, good for them.

[Dr. Jake Goodman]

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[Narrator/Announcer]

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[Susan]

Hi there.

[Narrator/Announcer]

We're looking to get to the campground.

[Kathy]

Well, you're gonna take a left at.

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[Susan]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Narrator/Announcer]

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[T-Mobile/Advertisement Voice]

Support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On Public you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index. With AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like ETFs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors, llc. SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures available at public.com disclosures this.

[Bowen Yang]

Is Bowen Yang from Lost Culture Resource with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. We all know the feeling when life gets really busy. Taking care of yourself can feel impossible. That's why Premier Protein shakes are my go to. They have 30 grams of protein, 160 calories, no added sugar and they taste amazing. So they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make. It's not just for fitness, it's for getting after life. Premier Protein empowers me to say yes to more. Find your favorite [e-mail] that's P R E M I E R protein.com.

[Susan]

Now it's time to answer some of our Fan questions, which we love doing. You ready? I'm going to start us off.

[Kathy]

Okay.

[Susan]

This one is from Anonymous. Hi, ladies. I need your help. My best friend told me something concerning. Something concerning about her boyfriend and I need to know if I was in the wrong for context. My bestie has been with her boyfriend for almost 8 years and they live together. Over brunch this past weekend, she told me that she was using his laptop to look something up. Not uncommon. He's very open and his devices. And she borrows his computer all the time. Okay, well, he left up his chat GPT conversation that started with the search. Oh God. How to break up with your long term girlfriend along with a pros and cons list he had chat GPT make about her. I told her to dump him because sorry to say, but duh. But she's refusing to. She hasn't even brought it up to him yet. Now she's kind of icing me out. Did I do something wrong? I wouldn't have been so brash about it if I realized she was staying. But by the way she was talking about it, I just kind of assumed, as I think anybody would. I was supportive in the conversation, but couldn't hide how horrific that was. They're still together despite her finding this stuff over three months ago. What should I do now? First of all.

[Kathy]

Yeah, go.

[Susan]

First of all, what is wrong with that girl that she's not gonna bring it up?

[Kathy]

You mean the girlfriend?

[Bowen Yang]

Yes.

[Kathy]

Okay, two things here. Number one, so again, Susan, as always, we don't have all the information we need, but if I believe that was enough.

[Susan]

Well, did he's on his computer and chats and having a breakup.

[Kathy]

Do you think perhaps he left chat GBT open on purpose? On purpose. However, the one question that is missing here is I didn't. Anonymous. I did not hear your friend ask you for your opinion. And God knows, Susan, you know I'm guilty of this all the time. She didn't ask you.

[Susan]

She brought it up at brunch.

[Kathy]

She told her what happened, but she did.

[Susan]

If your girlfriend. If I'm sitting there with you, especially that's a wrong example. If you're sitting there with me and.

[Kathy]

You tell me this did not give her opinion, but didn't I not tell you? I've learned in 2026 and have I not done better with you? I don't give you my opinion unless you ask, have I not done better? I wouldn't go that far, but okay, I'm getting better. And so I don't think she asked. I think. I think she just. I mean, I think it's deplorable.

[Susan]

But, you know, somebody said that to you. Are you just going to sit there with your mouth closed and not respond?

[Kathy]

In 2026, I'm going to go, oh, that really sucks. That's really sucks. If that happened to you, I'd say, God, Susan, that sucks. Gee, do you think maybe he left it open on purpose so you'd find it? But I'm not going to say to you, dump his ass. Old Kathy would have. So here's the deal. She's. She's. She wants weight. It begs back to our question of the day. Why?

[Susan]

What will you tolerate?

[Kathy]

What will you tolerate? In my mind, I don't really think that he's looking it up for his friend. You know, he's looking it up for him how to break up with a longtime girlfriend. It's on his computer. He probably hoped she would find it. But you know what? Maybe he's cheating on her. Maybe isn't. Again, why is this girl not asking? She doesn't want to know. Something to her is better than what.

[Susan]

Would you be happy living with that.

[Kathy]

Information as the girlfriend or me?

[Susan]

Yeah, as the girlfriend. No, as the person in the relationship.

[Kathy]

Yeah, that's the one that.

[Susan]

Anonymous. First of all, anonymous. I don't think you did anything wrong. You just gave your opinion.

[Kathy]

Yeah, well, here's the thing. The girl, the girlfriend clearly has an issue around self esteem. She's afraid to be alone. She's figuring something's better than nothing. Exactly what we talked about, the question of the day. For me, if I saw that. And you would. I would say, hey, you know what if you left your computer open, you know, I use your computer. Is there something you want to tell me? And he goes, what are you talking about? I'd point to the computer. But you know what she wants. It's what I just said to you.

[Susan]

She.

[Kathy]

Something to her is better than nothing. I'd rather have nothing than a guy who doesn't like, I feel like an idiot.

[Susan]

Like saying, I would feel stupid staying because obviously you're trying to break up with me. Let's have a conversation. Wait, you want this to end?

[Kathy]

Okay, then wait a minute. Maybe she doesn't have the money. Maybe he's helping to support her. Maybe he takes her on nice trips. Maybe he pays for the groceries. Maybe he bought her a pretty bracelet. She's hoping for something better for Valentine's Day. Who knows what you know, who knows?

[Susan]

And the pros and cons Maybe she should have listed her pros and cons about him and left that up on the computer.

[Kathy]

Exactly. Here's what I would say. Anonymous, what you should do. Nothing. Is absolutely nothing. Sorry. What you should do now. Tell her you're sorry, you shouldn't have given your opinion, and move on in the friendship as best you can. She knows. She knows.

[Susan]

Tell her you love her, you're her friend, and you're here to listen.

[Kathy]

Yeah. You know, and. And. And you hope things work out for them. That's all you can.

[Susan]

She can't do anything now. Like, you can't fix this. It's not you.

[Kathy]

It's. Yeah, I mean, she couldn't fix it to begin with, but I just want to reiterate. I believe that that girl, the girlfriend that Anonymous is talking about, epitomizes the question of the day she's willing to put up with a creep who probably has something else cooking in the kitchen. Because for whatever reason, I wonder why.

[Susan]

She'S icing her out. Like, why?

[Kathy]

Because she doesn't want to hear the truth.

[Susan]

She don't want to hear.

[Kathy]

She doesn't want to hear it. She knows. We all know in our heart of hearts, Susan. We all know the truth. We just don't want to hear it sometimes. So, yeah, sometimes takes us. Okay, let's move on.

[Susan]

All right. Thank you for writing in.

[Kathy]

Good luck for her. Yeah. Good luck. Anonymous. I hope your friendship survives this. Okay, question number two is also from an anonymous person. Hi, ladies. I need to know if you think I went too far in some breakup revenge. I was dating my now ex for two years. A few weeks ago, he got arrested and put in jail because his RA found some substances in his bedroom and called campus security. For anybody who doesn't know what an RA is, it's a resident advisor, and they're that the ones in charge of the dorms. Okay. My parents helped me post his bail. I got him out, helped him get connected with a lawyer, and I'm in the process of helping him get it off his record. Well, last night, I was over at his place to make dinner while he was at the gym. I was using his iPad for a recipe I needed when I saw a text come in. It was from the girl I caught him cheating on me with last semester. And it said, let me know when I'm in the clear to come over. So naturally, I took all of his clothes out of his drawers, brought them to one of the campus fountains. Wait, naturally, she did this?

[Susan]

Naturally.

[Kathy]

Brought them to one of the Campus fountains with my best friend and set them all on fire safely. I also called my parents lawyer he was using and told him his services were no longer needed. And I maybe also called his parents and told them everything that was going on. I'm sure he's pissed off, but I wouldn't know because I blocked him. Some of our mutual friends have blocked me on social media because they think I went too far. What do you think? Lol. Love you guys. Susan's got her mouth gaping wide open. I'm gonna let you take a shot at this one. What do you think? She go too far, girlfriend?

[Susan]

I think you were right, man.

[Kathy]

Now my mouth is gaping open. Why? You think she did the right thing?

[Susan]

The sneaky woman wanted to come in. Let me know when the coast is clear. When she's not there.

[Kathy]

Wait a minute. You think Anonymous burning his clothes is better?

[Susan]

Beating them with a bat?

[Kathy]

Oh, my God, Susan. Just when I thought you and I were on the same page for life. Anonymous. Kathy over here thinks a few weeks ago he got arrested. He had weed or whatever he had in his bedroom. The parents. Her parents got him out of jail, put up bail. No, that's a hard no. I got him out, helped him get connected with the lawyer. That's a hard no. He could figure out his own life. Then you were over at his place. Oh, and you're also. You are also in the process of helping to get it off his record. Let him worry about that too then. Now you're over at his house cooking him dinner. You my friend, Anonymous. I'm sure if I met you, I would love you. But you are so needy. You need a bad boy. And you, instead of letting him face his own music, get himself out of jail, post his own bail, and figure out his own damn life. You're over there.

[Susan]

Some people, Kathy, do help the people they love. They do. Some people are fixers and try to do everything. And I would do the same thing. I totally get what she's doing, what she did.

[Kathy]

He can get his own lawyer. If she can get a lawyer, he can get a lawyer. Her parents posted bail for him. Let your parent let the boyfriend's parents post.

[Susan]

He didn't want his parents to know, obviously.

[Kathy]

And that's why he. That's why she is putting up with a boyfriend that I would never.

[Susan]

Well, she didn't know she was putting up with anything until this.

[Kathy]

Oh, no, no. She called his parents so she. She knew he didn't want his parents to know, so she had. It's. It's called. What is it called when you help someone out? I can't think of the word enabling. And thank you. That would be the word, Susan. Enabling. Thank you so much.

[Susan]

But I don't think this was enabling because they were in a relationship.

[Kathy]

It is enabling. He needs to figure out his own problems. Get your parents. His parents.

[Susan]

She had parents that knew somebody. Like, it's just easier.

[Kathy]

No, no, no.

[Susan]

It's making it different that way, but go on, Go on.

[Kathy]

So I would never have done any of that. And then you wouldn't have burned. And you know why? And you know why?

[Susan]

She knew I would have wrote the girl back.

[Kathy]

And you know why she knew you know what?

[Susan]

And I would answer the door, See?

[Kathy]

You and I are so different. I. If I saw that on the podcast, I mean, on the podcast, on his computer, iPad, whatever, I would take his clothes. I would. I'm sorry. I would take myself out of the house. I would walk home, I would block him, and I would never speak to him again. It would be.

[Susan]

That's it? No conversation? Oh, God, no.

[Kathy]

Well, there might be a conversation. I would say, hey, I saw that you wanted a girlfriend, so we're over. Burning his clothes in a fountain. It's juvenile, Anonymous.

[Susan]

It is. That made her feel good.

[Kathy]

You seriously see nothing wrong with that?

[Susan]

No, I think it's funny.

[Kathy]

Okay.

[Susan]

A woman's score, man. Don't cheat on me, asshole. After all the things I did for you. You sorry. Nope, nope, nope, nope. And I'm glad she called us parents. You could take care of them.

[Kathy]

That they should have been caring for their son the whole time they're in college.

[Susan]

They didn't know because he didn't want mommy and daddy and.

[Kathy]

And obviously she played along. She played along with those. It never comes to any good. I'm sorry. Those situations never come to any good. And I'm sorry, Anonymous. But you know what? Grow up. I'm going to tell you. Grow up.

[Susan]

And she just wanted to know our opinion of what we thought.

[Kathy]

I said if you went, you didn't go too far. You went so far over the cliff, Anonymous, that you're going to be on hand gliding for 20 hours to get to ground.

[Susan]

Says Kathy. But Susan here is like giving you a bravo. That made you feel better. Go for it. It's all over now. Move on.

[Kathy]

Yep. That's the other thing. Keep him blocked. Move on. Breakup revenge should not even be a thing, by the way. Is it a thing for you, Susan? Break up Revenge.

[Susan]

No, I don't do revenge. I told you no, I'm friends with everybody.

[Kathy]

All right, so you would never. So I don't understand. We've got to move on. But I truly don't understand why you're applauding her. Burning his clothes. You would never.

[Susan]

Because he was cheating.

[Kathy]

Cats. Have you ever had someone cheat on you?

[Susan]

Only when I was very, very, very young.

[Kathy]

And these people are very, very young. They're in college. I don't know. I'm sorry. I just. I don't see it. It. This one's funny.

[Susan]

Burning his clothes. I know. That would torture me. All right, we're going to do rapid fire advice.

[Kathy]

Yeah. Okay. We're going to. I just have to tell you, I may never cut that question. It's going to go. When next time someone says to me, what is the biggest question that you and Susan disagreed on? That one's going to be framed in my office. Burning Somebody's burning somebody's clothes.

[Susan]

No, seriously, one more thing. I definitely would have coaxed that text that was coming in said, come now, sweetheart. Oh, dear. Yes. And we'd both be sitting there when he walked in. That would give me more pleasure than burning clothes. What are you gonna do now, dum dum?

[Kathy]

But see, I just. That takes so much effort, Susan. I wouldn't want to put the effort into that. I'd rather go, what effort is that?

[Susan]

You're responding. Yeah, come now.

[Kathy]

And then sitting and making him deal with it. I just walk out, take my self respect and walk out the door.

[Dr. Jake Goodman]

Ever been at a pharmacy counter and the pharmacist asks, do you have any questions? And suddenly your mind goes blank? That's exactly why you need to listen to beyond the script from CVS Pharmacy and iHeartMedia. Hosted by Dr. Jake Goodman, this podcast brings you real conversations with CVS pharmacists, the health experts you see most answering the questions you wish you'd asked, like which medications might not mix well, what vaccines you should consider before a big trip. And even those questions you are too embarrassed to say out loud. Each episode busts myths, decodes health trends, and gives you practical, trustworthy advice straight from the people behind the counter. No white coats, no lectures. Just real talk, real answers, and maybe a few laughs. Listen to beyond the script on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Get your podcasts from Warner Bros. Pictures. And award winning filmmaker Emerald Fennell comes Wuthering Heights, starring Margot Robbie opposite Jacob Elordi in this bold reimagining of Emily Bronte's classic novel of the same name. Fennell takes audiences on a yearning and emotionally charged journey following star crossed lovers Kathy, played by Robbie, and Heathcliff, played by Elordi. As their forbidden love for one another turns from romantic to intoxicating in an epic tale of lust, love and madness, Heathcliff's plea says it be with me always. Take any form. Drive me mad. Go see this visually intoxicating it girl. Cultural phenomenon of the season. Wuthering Heights Come Undone Only in theaters February 13th. Experience it in IMAX. Be sure to check out Charli XCX's new album Wuthering Heights, featuring new music from the Wuthering Heights movie. Rated R. Under 17. Not admitted without a parent we're lost. I'm gonna pull over and ask that man for directions.

[Susan]

Hi there.

[Narrator/Announcer]

We're looking to get to the campground.

[Kathy]

Well, you're gonna take a left at.

[T-Mobile/Advertisement Voice]

The old oak tree end of this here road. No, I'm just kidding. Let me get my phone out.

[Susan]

How are you getting a signal out here?

[Kathy]

T Mobile and US Cellular decided to.

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[Kathy]

Oh, and a five year price guarantee.

[T-Mobile/Advertisement Voice]

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[Kathy]

Actually, can you point us in the.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Direction of a T Mobile store?

[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Kathy]

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[Bowen Yang]

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[Kathy]

We are going to end off on a little segment called Rapid Fire Advice. Susan's answer to all these are Burn your clothes. Okay, we'll switch off reading the prompts and we'll give each. Excuse me. We will each give the first piece of advice that comes to mind. I'll start us off. Here we go. Your best friend tells you her boyfriend has screenshots of your Instagram saved on his phone. What do you say?

[Susan]

Your best friend tells you her boyfriend.

[Kathy]

Susan, Let me make this simple. Frederic. I tell you that Frederic has screenshots of me on his Instagram saved on his phone. Not on his Instagram. Pictures of me saved on his phone. What are you gonna say?

[Susan]

Oh, I mean, you're my friend. I don't care.

[Kathy]

All right, you don't care.

[Susan]

I didn't look at it like it was a bad thing.

[Kathy]

I mean, I think if it was a picture of me from the beach or something, we were there. Fine. But if. If you see on Frederic's phone a bunch of pictures of some other girl saved onto a screenshot. Screenshots not Not. My Instagram pulled up that he's got screenshots from my Instagram and he's got them saved on his phone. You don't think that's a little weird?

[Susan]

Yeah, it's probably a little weird. I don't know. That one didn't get me that bad.

[Kathy]

I'd lose him, too. I'm telling you, my thing today is lose these men. And I wonder why I'm not dating. All right, all right.

[Susan]

Here's one. Your friend just found out the guy she's dating still venmos his ex for coffee advice.

[Kathy]

No.

[Susan]

Still coffee advice.

[Kathy]

No. Still Venmo's his ex for coffee.

[Susan]

For coffee.

[Kathy]

Meaning they go out for coffee together. My advice.

[Susan]

Lose.

[Kathy]

My advice is lose the guy. If he's dating somebody else and having coffee with his ex. She's not his ex. Friend. Offload him.

[Susan]

But see, I think differently because Dickie and I will go have a cup of coffee, and that's different.

[Kathy]

Susan, you were married, and you don't hide that from Frederic. That's not what I'm.

[Susan]

Of course not.

[Kathy]

Well, your friend just found out. They. They just found out. I don't know. I don't get it.

[Susan]

Wait a minute. Is he. Is he. He just given money so she could have coffee?

[Kathy]

Yeah. I don't care.

[Susan]

That's just weird.

[Kathy]

It's weird again. Offload him. An ex, whether he's buying her coffee, giving her money for coffee, or. Or the. The Venmo that says for coffee is really for sex, and he just writes this for coffee. I don't care. Any guy that's dealing with his sex. I'm not interested in. Goodbye.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Okay.

[Kathy]

All right, here's the next one.

[Susan]

All right, take the next one.

[Kathy]

Your friend says her partner doesn't believe in labels. After six months, what do you tell her?

[Susan]

Oh, that's a shame for you.

[Kathy]

You know what I tell her? Nothing. She didn't ask me. I don't care. What do we care? You don't want a label. Don't put a label on it. I don't care.

[Susan]

Put a label on it.

[Kathy]

Who cares?

[Susan]

That means I'm free.

[Kathy]

I mean, that's a different. I tell her they've. Yeah, if you don't want to date on a label, you don't want a label.

[Susan]

Your friend's boyfriend liked her best friend's bikini picture from 2018 at 2am what's your take?

[Kathy]

Why the hell did you know that he was up at 2am looking at her picture? You're going through his phone? That's my advice, Stop going through his phone.

[Susan]

People that go in and see who likes what, don't you have a life?

[Kathy]

It all goes back to the question of the day. These women do not trust themselves. They don't have enough self confidence. Why would you stick with a guy who's up at 2am? Why are you checking his phone? You're checking his phone because you don't trust him. Your best friend's bikini pic from 2008.

[Susan]

No, she's not checking his phone. She saw this, I guess online. Your friend's boyfriend liked her best friend's bikini picture from 2018 and he liked it at 2am I saw that. That.

[Kathy]

Susan, I don't care if you liked it at high noon. Why?

[Susan]

What's your take?

[Kathy]

My take is why is he liking if. If you just don't mess around with exes, you don't like their pictures, you delete them from your phone.

[Susan]

It's her best friend.

[Kathy]

Again.

[Susan]

Boyfriends. Your friend's boyfriend.

[Kathy]

Can I just say with this episode, I'm single forever. I swear. I'm sorry. All right. Your friend found a hidden folder. Here we go. On her partner's phone again. Going through the phone. Your friend found a hidden folder on her partner's phone labeled receipts with screenshots of text from her. What do you tell her to do?

[Susan]

Friend found with screenshots.

[Kathy]

It's. Listen, these are all, these are all variations on a theme. Name. It's a friend. There's three people involved here. Usually a partner, the partner's partner, and then a third person. So your friend found a hidden folder on her label phone. Label receipts with screenshots of texts from her. Not from the girlfriend or the other, from her again. Number.

[Susan]

What do you tell her to do?

[Kathy]

Get off his phone and dump him to the curb.

[Susan]

Yeah, there you go.

[Kathy]

I mean it's just, it's just. It's all the same. Stop going through their phone.

[Susan]

Non trusting relationship. Nothing is going to be good if you have to go spy. I know curiosity sometimes takes over, but it's just stupid.

[Kathy]

Is it curiosity or is it what you just said? If you don't have trust. I think you were right.

[Susan]

It's a non trust.

[Kathy]

Yeah, it's non trust. And that's why these relationships don't work. Because you know, if it smells like fire, looks like a dog, whatever those.

[Susan]

Expressions, it's going to burn.

[Kathy]

It's going to burn. All right, go ahead.

[Susan]

Okay. Your friend says her situation situationship introduced her as my friend at a party. That's happened.

[Kathy]

What?

[Susan]

And it feels awkward. What? You're in a situationship. You're with a guy that you think you're dating. I mean, yours are thing. And he says at a party and introduced you as my friend. Well, they are friends. Yeah, I've said that. And I've been called on it too.

[Kathy]

Well, you know, again, we back to labels. My advice is, if you don't like being labeled a friend, then figure out what the situation of the situationship is. All right. Your friend's partner says they don't post her because they're private, but they post everything else. What do you say? I've actually had this friends that have had this happen to your friend's partner.

[Susan]

Okay.

[Kathy]

Says they don't post her. In other words, the part you're getting confused with the pronouns. The partner doesn't post pictures of the person because he says their relationship is private, but that person posts everything else. What do you say? There's a reason.

[Susan]

Why do you have me a secret?

[Kathy]

Yeah, there's a reason. Girlfriend, boyfriend, they, him, he, whatever. However you label yourself, there's a reason.

[Susan]

I would ask why.

[Kathy]

Ask why. And you know what the the running theme of today is? You might want to be considering. Do you want to stay in the situation of this situationship where your partner may not be your only partner? Holy.

[Susan]

Okay, your friend caught her boyfriend deleting text as she walked into the room. What's your advice?

[Kathy]

I know it, Susan. I know what you're going to say. You're going to see.

[Susan]

No, they're not deleted. They're there for 30 freaking days. Go look. Pull it up. Let me see what you're hiding.

[Kathy]

I knew you were going to say that. Susan's going to say, go to those three dots and undo delete messages. I'm going to say let it go. Because if your partner is cheating on you, you're going to find it out for sure. He might be. I delete texts all the time.

[Susan]

I do, too.

[Kathy]

So it's. It's, you know, not everything. Is somebody cheating on you? Really not, you know, if you. If you.

[Susan]

I know if you just delete and crap. Me.

[Kathy]

Yeah. I mean, if you're buying your ex venoin your ex for coffee, that might be your venue for, you know, sexual favors. But if they're deleting texts. Wait, wait for a little more proof. Just, you know. All right. Jeez. All right. Your friend says her partner follows 300 thirst. Oh, 300 plus thirst traps, but never compliments her. What do you say? Day do you know what a thirst trap is? Okay, so a thirst trap, I had to look it up. It's something on social media. It's a social media post intended to entice viewers. Sexually. Okay, so her partner.

[Susan]

Friend says her.

[Kathy]

So he's looking at sexual. Sexual posts. That invites sexual.

[Susan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kathy]

Okay. What do you say? He never.

[Susan]

That's like the guy that likes to go to the strip club. Maybe that's what turns him on. But if he's not hiding it, I guess it's okay. I don't know.

[Kathy]

He never compliments her. But he's. But He's. He follows 300. That means he's got thirst traps all over his Instagram, all over his phone. But he's.

[Susan]

But does he compliment them or he's just complimenting them?

[Kathy]

He. I don't care. He never compliments her again.

[Susan]

What do I say?

[Kathy]

What? What do I say? Enough.

[Susan]

You're going to put yourself.

[Narrator/Announcer]

No.

[Kathy]

Why are you going to ask a man that if. If he isn't treating.

[Susan]

So you rather cut and dry. No explanation. You just the scene where I want to talk about it.

[Kathy]

Well, because. What. That's exactly what I said for the last question. This. Your partner friend is giving you other hints. If he's not just following 300 thirst traps. If. If that's all he's doing. So he's got a fetish. Whatever.

[Susan]

Yeah, that's what I mean.

[Kathy]

But. But if he's never complimenting you, he might be taking it to another level. Look at the relationship.

[Susan]

Well, just because you're following doesn't mean he's complimenting them. He's just not a complimentary guy.

[Kathy]

It's intended to entice them. If he's following them, he's reading them, he's looking at them. He might well be interacting with them. I mean, I don't. I would show him the door, but that's just me. I mean, I keep saying the same thing to you.

[Susan]

Okay. Your friend is considering moving in with someone she's never argued with. With advice.

[Kathy]

I think they're gonna. You know. What? Move in. You're sh. You're gonna have your first argument very soon after you know that. Okay.

[Susan]

So what did you think about this game?

[Kathy]

You know, honestly, this whole episode, I've repeated myself 26 times. So I'm gonna say it one more time. I think this whole episode is about not necessarily women, but I think unfortunately it's more with women than men having. Not having the self confidence. Instead they try to make excuses. They post bail, they get lawyers, they try to get things taken off their records, they try to fix their fixers. Women need to stop being fixers. Take responsibility for yourself and your own happiness and let your partner, if it's a guy, whatever, don't deny yourself.

[Susan]

I mean, you're worth it. Keep believe that that you are worth more.

[Kathy]

Well than just if you believe you're worth more, you have to take action, which is not putting up with disrespectful.

[Susan]

No, I agree.

[Kathy]

100 and I'm now depressed because I'm never gonna have a date ever again. I mean really.

[Susan]

And that does it for today's episode. Thank you so much to everyone that's listening and I think you guys out there listening, listening probably agree with us.

[Kathy]

Well, you agree with one of us for sure because we're on opposite ends. Listen, while you're working on your fabulous relationships and building up your own self esteem, please be sure to keep sending us all your questions and comments. It's easy. Just go to bachelornation.com golden hour and submit away. We really want to hear with we want to hear from you. Susan and I are most likely going to be on opposite ends of the table here, so you're going to get Sometimes we agree, sometimes you're right.

[Susan]

Make sure to listen to Bachelor Happy Hours golden hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to your podcast. And we'll see you next time.

[Kathy]

Take care.

[Bowen Yang]

This is Bowen Yang from Lost Culture Research with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. We all know the feeling when life gets really busy. Taking care of yourself can feel impossible. That's why Premier Protein shakes are my go to. They have 30 grams of protein, 160 calor, no added sugar and they taste amazing. So they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make. It's not just for fitness, it's for getting after life. The 30 grams of protein gives you the fuel you need. It's not just for intense gym sessions. It's just for life. With a wide variety of flavors, from cafe latte to cake batter, it never feels boring. It's a flavor for everyone. I personally love the peaches and cream, but maybe you're a root beer floater cinnamon roll kind of person. Premier Protein powers me to say yes to more. Find your favorite [e-mail] that's P R E M I E R protein.com or at Amazon, Walmart and other major retailers.

[Kathy]

Running my small business was like playing basketball.

[Susan]

Five on one and I was the one.

[Bowen Yang]

Now QuickBooks gives me access to a.

[Kathy]

Team of AI agents and trusted experts.

[Dr. Jake Goodman]

For the assists.

[Susan]

I need nothing but net outdoit with.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Intuit QuickBooks feature available varies by product.

[Kathy]

This is Chelsea Handler from Dear Chelsea, I have some very exciting news about an ethical phone carrier I just switched to Forget about all these other phone companies.

[Susan]

Forget about Verizon, forget about AT&T.

[Kathy]

Forget about T Mobile.

[Susan]

There's this new carrier called Noble Mobile.

[Kathy]

And they actually pay you to stay off your phone.

[Susan]

You can earn real money, up to.

[Kathy]

20 bucks back every month just for putting your phone away. If you're like me and you're tired.

[Susan]

Of feeling controlled by your phone, social media, or just disgusted by those screen.

[Kathy]

Time alerts, this is the answer.

[Susan]

Go to noblemobile.com Chelsea and try it for $10. That's noblemobile.com Chelsea Tired of juggling dozens of supplements?

[Narrator/Announcer]

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