How Dangerous is Backpacking, Paka Sun Hoodie Review, the Worst Gifts for Young Kids, and the Boy Who Cried Wolf Gone Wrong

Summary

Backpacker Radio - Episode Summary

Podcast: Backpacker Radio
Hosts: Zach "Badger" Davis & Juliana "Chaunce" Chauncey
Episode: How Dangerous is Backpacking, Paka Sun Hoodie Review, the Worst Gifts for Young Kids, and the Boy Who Cried Wolf Gone Wrong
Date: May 28, 2026

---

Episode Overview

In this lively, anecdote-filled episode, Zach and Chaunce take listeners through a whirlwind of topics: the real dangers of hiking and how common hiking-related deaths are, an in-depth sun hoodie gear review, a Triple Crown of the worst children's gifts (featuring horror stories from parenting and childhood), and a hilariously botched re-telling of The Boy Who Cried Wolf. The show blends statistics, personal stories, listener mail, and parent-life confessions, all delivered in the hosts' signature candid and humorous style.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. How Dangerous is Backpacking? (01:29–14:58)

• Chaunce presents a rundown of U.S. annual death statistics, placing hiking-related deaths in context with other causes (e.g., heart disease, car crashes, drowning, and...champagne corks).
• Hiking and Trail Recreation: About 700 deaths per year, much less than heart disease (695,000), car crashes (43,000), or even general falls (42,000), but more than hurricanes, tornadoes, or dog attacks.

Detailed Breakdown of Hiking-related Deaths (06:48–13:22):

• Cardiac Arrest/Heart Attack: 168 deaths (24%) — #1 cause on trail, often in people with no prior diagnosis.
  • “Heat and exertion trigger hidden conditions.” (Chaunce, 07:00)
• Falls/Slips: 147 deaths (21%) — ledges, scrambling, wet rocks; 83% are male.
  • “Yosemite leads for all the NPS parks.” (Chaunce, 08:40)
• Drowning: 112 deaths (16%) — river crossings and flash floods; Lake Mead is especially dangerous.
  • “Most hike down in the cold and then die climbing back up.” (Chaunce, 09:52)
• Heat Stroke/Exhaustion: 98 deaths (14%); Grand Canyon averages 15 per year.
• Hypothermia: 56 deaths (8%), mainly above treeline or with abrupt weather.
  • “Wet plus wind equals fastest onset.” (Chaunce, 11:03)
• Getting Lost/Exposure: 42 deaths (6%).
• Avalanche: 28 deaths (4%), mostly in CO & UT, with snowshoers increasingly at risk.
• Rockfall/Terrain Hazards: 21 deaths (3%), North Cascades cited as especially sketchy.
• Lightning: 8 deaths (1.2%) — CO 14ers are riskiest.
• Wildlife Attack: 5 deaths (<1%), mainly grizzly bears.
• Undetermined: 15 deaths (2%), but 14% of park deaths are “undetermined” due to remote conditions.

Notable Quotes:

• “So more people die hiking than in a hurricane in an average year.” (Zach, 05:01)
• “Vending machines kill at least 13 people a year, which is more than sharks.” (Chaunce, 05:19)
• “The overall death rate for hikers is about 4 per 100,000, odds at .004%.” (Chaunce, 06:48)

Takeaway:

Backpacking is statistically quite safe; most trail deaths are preventable or related to underlying conditions and outdoor missteps.

---

2. Trail News: Human Remains Near the Appalachian Trail (15:09–16:29)

• Hikers in Vermont found human foot bones inside partially buried boots, sparking an investigation.
  • "On the list of spooky things to discover, finding a foot in a boot feels like something straight out of a horror movie." (Chaunce, 15:57)
• No further public update yet.

---

3. Triple Crown: The Worst Gifts for Young Kids (28:14–42:16)

• Inspired by a recent real-life experience: giving a whistle to a 3-year-old (spoiler: it’s a terrible idea).

Zach & Chaunce’s Picks:

• Whistle: "A whistle is an excruciating present from the parents’ perspective. Do not ever give a young kid a whistle. It’s a nightmare.” (Zach, 29:01)
• Stickers: Stickers everywhere except where intended; ruin house and possessions.
• Candy/Gum/Slime: Sweet things or sticky toys that create messes, hazards, or impossible cleaning situations.
  • “Had to pull [gum] out and break it into bits so I could swallow it bit by bit.” (Chaunce, 33:41)
• Markers that don't wash out: Permanent markings everywhere.
• Toys with too many parts: Leads to clutter, lost pieces, meltdowns, and parent frustration.
  • “You have all these individual plastic pieces ... You’re living in a dumpster of chaos.” (Zach, 36:35)
• Small animals as pets: Temporary pets (fish, hermit crabs, snails) create misery for parents when they die or multiply exponentially.
  • “Then the snails had babies. There were hundreds of these baby snails...I came home one day and my snail tank was not there. Dad just said, ‘Away.’” (Chaunce, 39:08)

BONUS: Best Children’s Gift

• Books! Personal, educational, and durable.
  • “Books is the best.” (Zach, 40:22)

---

4. Parenting Fails: Boy Who Cried Wolf Gone Wrong (44:08–46:47)

• Zach attempts to teach his son Leo about honesty by retelling “The Boy Who Cried Wolf,” but forgets key plot elements (the sheep) and accidentally turns the tale into one where the wolf eats the boy.
  • “As I’m telling the story, I realized that I don’t really remember the story ... so the wolf eats them. The look of terror in his eyes...” (Zach, 44:55)
• Leo corrects him, recalling the sheep, not just the boy, are eaten.
  • “I looked at Jenna before I delivered the end, and I’m like, I don’t think this is going to go well.” (Zach, 46:47)

---

5. Gear Review: Paka Sun Hoodie (47:02–51:37)

• Zach reviews the Paka Sole Sun Hoodie:
  • Softness: Best feature, due to 14% royal alpaca wool blend (with Tencel), "very high-end."
  • Odor Resistance: Passes the “wool test” after runs and hikes.
  • Downside: Too hot for high-output, warm-weather hiking; holds sweat (better for cool or low-output use).
• Score: 5.3 Chance's Boobs (“John’s Boobs” = their wacky gear rating scale).
  • “For hot weather hiking...this one’s just too hot for me.” (Zach, 49:58)
  • “It feels like a very nice sit-on-the-couch-and-watch-a-movie fabric.” (Chaunce, 49:58)

---

6. Mailbag: Listener Stories & Questions (51:44–59:54)

Highlight:

• Cassie’s epic email about embarrassing moments listening to the podcast at work (including an accidental “moaning” audio clip played for a contractor), and an even more colorful tale about a roadside emergency poop caught on a trail camera.
  • “It had seen everything... my only hope is the mailboxes, trees, and night had been enough to obscure the logo.” (Cassie, 54:52)
• Question about Zach’s anime interests: “Are you a secret Weeb?” (Cassie, 59:19)
  • Zach: “That’s not me.” (59:29)
• Appreciation for the authentic chaos the podcast brings to listeners’ lives.

---

7. Listener Reviews & Feedback (60:16–64:47)

• Five-Star Review: Praise for hiking content; criticism for offering “very wrong” advice on health and nutrition.
  • “For example, daily electrolytes is wasteful at best and renal toxic at worst...” (Listener, 61:12)
• Zach and Chaunce clarify:
  • Not a doctor, not giving medical advice.
  • “If you are deficient in electrolytes, supplement it. If not, you just pee it out.” (Zach, 61:28)
• Listeners are encouraged to always consult professionals regarding health advice.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Vending machines kill at least 13 people a year, which is more than sharks.” (Chaunce, 05:19)
• “You’re living in a dumpster of chaos.” (Zach, 36:35)
• “I came home one day and my snail tank was not there. Dad just said, ‘Away.’” (Chaunce, 39:08)
• “As I’m telling the story, I realized... some of the details I’ll miss... The wolf eats them. The look of terror in his eyes.” (Zach, 44:55)
• “For hot weather hiking...this one’s just too hot for me.” (Zach, 49:58)
• “Books is the best.” (Zach, 40:22)

---

Timestamps for Reference

• Statistics: Ways to Die in the Outdoors: 01:29–13:22
• Trail News: Human Remains: 15:09–16:29
• Triple Crown — Worst Kids’ Gifts: 28:14–42:16
• Parenting Fail — Boy Who Cried Wolf: 44:08–46:47
• Paka Sun Hoodie Review: 47:02–51:37
• Mailbag: Cassie’s Epic Listener Stories: 51:44–59:54
• Listener Feedback & Medical Disclaimer: 60:16–64:47

---

Episode Tone and Style

True to Backpacker Radio’s style, the episode is conversational, irreverent, and relatable—mixing practical trail info, gear advice, and the very real (and often messy) realities of adulthood, parenthood, and wilderness misadventures. Candid laughter, supportive teasing, and plenty of “you heard it here first” education for life both on and off the trail.

---

Summary prepared for listeners seeking the key lessons, laughs, and learnings without the ads, intros, or outros.

Transcript

[A]

You may think you know McDonald's drinks, but you don't know them like this. From fruity refreshers like the Strawberry Watermelon Refresher and the Mango Pineapple Refresher with popping Boba. To crafted sodas like the Sprite Berry Blast with berry flavored Sprite topped with cold foam. Who knew ice cold drinks could be so fire six? All new drinks are here. Try them all now at McDonald's. Refreshers contain caffeine. We have the tech to get food delivered in 15 minutes. But we all have horror stories about buying tickets. The GameTime app gives fans the advantage. Get amazing tickets in just a few taps. Fees are included, so what you see is what you pay. And the gametime guarantee means authentic tickets at the best price every time. Take the guesswork out of buying tickets to concerts, sports, comedy, and more with GameTime. Download the GameTime app and create an account for $20 off your first purchase term supply. To the bonus segment. Chance's turn.

[B]

Yay. Hi, guys. This is our bonus segment and it is this week is Ways to. Well, ways. Ways to die. So maybe we'll put a death trigger warning here, but this is.

[A]

Have we done a triple crown of ways to die?

[B]

I don't think so.

[A]

That's one that we should do.

[B]

We should do that.

[A]

I had that thought recently. I'm like, I feel like we've done that, but maybe not.

[B]

Yeah, this will definitely give some ideas for it, but this is more of a statistics on how you might die, but rather than a ways you could choose to die.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Type of thing. So not morbid. Well, morbid, but not in a sad. Well, it's still sad. Anyway. Ways to die. So I. I went into recent statistics on. On ways that people die, and this is a ranking of what is the highest amount of estimated annual US Deaths to lowest in terms of ones that are exciting to say. And then we will jump into the hiking one a little bit.

[A]

Yeah. So, I mean, it's like heart disease and cancer, right?

[B]

Well, you're right. Heart disease is number one.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That one's 695,000 annual US deaths per year. And the leading cause, number two is actually car crashes. That one's got 43,000.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But that's way less than 695,000. That's like a big jump down. Then comes falls in general. Like falling off things. Barely less it's 42,000. So 1,000 less.

[A]

And I would imagine falls includes just like old people falling and.

[B]

Yeah. Stairs, ladders, beds.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, I think a lot of

[A]

people die to broke. Like the byproduct of broken bones when they're old. Yeah, like the breaking the hip thing is a real deal.

[B]

That's why Life Alert is a business.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then we get another jump down. So now we're going from 42, 000 down to 4, 000.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And that's drowning in all types.

[A]

So it feels like a lot.

[B]

Rivers, lakes, pools, all drowning. 4, 000 annual US deaths.

[A]

It's like too many people drowning.

[B]

Yeah, there's def. Maybe could be improved there. Then we dropped down to 1000 again. So another jump. And this, ironically, is the same. Same 1,000 for both of these two things, which are opposites, which is cold exposure and extreme heat.

[A]

Just the conditions in general.

[B]

Yeah, Both of those each have a thousand per year.

[A]

This is a makeshift trek propaganda, but Andy Skirk has got a video about that specific subject on the Trek's YouTube. So check it out.

[B]

All right. Under that comes hiking and trail recreation, and that's 700.

[A]

We're not still like, on the top list, right? This is just like giving context.

[B]

Number seven.

[A]

There's no way that hiking on trail is number the seventh leading cause of death in the U.S. i mean, it's

[B]

going to go further than that, but yeah, this is seven on this list. Sorry, not of all things, just on this list of where it ranks amongst other things.

[A]

Okay. Okay.

[B]

This is a list of where it ranks amongst other notable things.

[A]

Sure. Just as a hiking podcast, I didn't want to give.

[B]

I don't mean it that way. I'm sorry.

[A]

Statistic. That is the top 10 leading cause of death.

[B]

I'm just probably not. Yeah, I think there's other things in between. It's not like all. All encompassing. Anyway. Then 200 deaths per year. Deer, vehicle collisions.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

150. Hurricane. And then tornadoes are at 80. That's the U.S. 10 year average.

[A]

So more people die hiking than in a hurricane in an average year.

[B]

Yeah, but then I asked it to break that down. So we're not there yet.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So then we get dogs. Dogs are 47 deaths per year. Mountain climbing is 25. Champagne corks are 24.

[A]

I was hiking more than rock climbing.

[B]

Well, let's break it down. So hiking includes. Well, actually, let's do some fun ones first. Um, vending machines kill at least 13 people a year, which is more than sharks, because people shake them when they steal snacks, and then they fall on

[A]

them and the vending machine strikes back.

[B]

Yes. Champagne corks kill around 24 people annually, usually at weddings and New Year's Eves.

[A]

Interesting. I always do make a fun joke to shoot the cork, but I aim away from people.

[B]

But yeah, it is fun to show it is falling out of bed. 450 deaths per year. More than all hiking related falls in national parks.

[A]

I'm surprised that doesn't just get lumped in with the original falling stat.

[B]

Yeah, I don't know, I'm not like a scientist.

[A]

No. John's just reporting numbers.

[B]

And then here's some more fun ones. The most lethal venomous animal in the US is bees, wasps and hornets. They have around 60 deaths per year from anaphylaxis. In 2025, there were nine unprovoked shark fatalities worldwide. Oh, here's a fun one. Lightning deaths have dropped from 50 a year to 21 a year since 2001. And that's largely due to better public education.

[A]

I thought the reasoning was gonna be that people are stuck inside looking at their phones.

[B]

Nope. Apparently it's better public education.

[A]

Yeah. Giving themselves heart disease and dying by.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The overall death rate for hikers is about 4 per 100,000, which puts the odds at.004%.

[A]

Yeah. So you said you broke down the hiking deaths.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

What are, what are those numbers?

[B]

Okay, so we said 700 hiking and trail recreation total, and that breaks down to 168 being cardiac arrest slash heart attack. That's 24%. The number one killer on trail. Half had no prior diagnosis. Heat and exertion trigger hidden conditions.

[A]

Huh.

[B]

Then 147 people were what?

[A]

This is not me challenging you. This is me challenging. The stat potentially is like if somebody had a heart attack while sitting in a movie theater, would they call that a movie theater induced. Like, I understand you're saying that they don't have any prior incidents, but I imagine most people that have heart attacks haven't had previous heart attacks.

[B]

Well, this is saying that heat and exertion can trigger those conditions. Whereas like sitting in a movie theater isn't going to trigger your heat and exertion.

[A]

Yeah. Could get you stressed out depending on the movie, but.

[B]

Yeah. Well then I, I would say if, like, if you went to a horror movie and it gave you a heart attack, I would say you got a heart attack. You got a heart attack because of the movie.

[A]

Yeah. Just seems like if you're, if you're at that point, it's probably just going to happen. I don't know.

[B]

Yeah, maybe. I don't know. I digress.

[A]

I'm Not a doctor.

[B]

I just, I didn't come with rebuttals either. 20. So 21% is falls and slips. That's 147. Ledges, wet rocks, off trail, scrambling. 83% of that 21% are male. So maybe that's because like there's more ratio of men outdoors or maybe that's because men are more likely to be like don't worry babe, I got this. Go. Scramble off trail and run. Regret.

[A]

Definitely some combination. Guys are more stupid but I would. I wonder what the stat is of just guys on trails in general.

[B]

Yosemite leads for all the MPS parks then 112. That is around 16% and that is caused by drowning. So river crossings and flash floods.

[A]

This is one that pops up like I feel every year. Maybe every other year or so. But the people that get the. I forget the terminology but the shock when they jump into cold water and their muscles stop working. Yeah, that's put like a permanent. I'm now afraid of everything. But like jumping into cold lakes has put a permanent fear into me. And when I see people do it I get a panicked about it.

[B]

Yeah, I don't want to go in a cold lake cuz it's cold. I don't. That just adds even more. It's like if I needed another reason.

[A]

Yeah, no, I like the wim hofness of that part of it. But like your muscles shutting down and then just like slowly drowning because not

[B]

being able to move, that's a terrible way to go. Really bad. So for the drownings, the number one place was Lake Mead.

[A]

Where's that?

[B]

Is that Arizona? Put money on Utah.

[A]

You're both wrong.

[B]

Is it Nevada?

[A]

Nevada? Yeah.

[B]

Okay, well I'm not a geographer either. And then also flash floods and slot

[A]

canyons in Nevada and Arizona.

[B]

I was just purely wrong. Okay, fine. Next 98. And that is 14%. And that goes to heat stroke and heat exhaustion. Grand Canyon averages 15 heat deaths a year. The canyon floor hits 120 degrees Fahrenheit. Most hike down in the cold and then die climbing back up like it's cooler when they go down.

[A]

Based on these stats, I do wonder if sauna training is actually more credible than even I was giving it credit for. I've always like intuited that that it could help with that sort of thing.

[B]

Sounds like heat's a problem.

[A]

Heat definitely feels like a real problem. That's probably also just most three season backpacking you're exposed to more heat than extreme cold. Yeah, but yeah, if, if we're talking, people are dying of heat stroke, heart attack related to heat. It seems like there's a lot of issues.

[B]

Yeah. So 98 people were heat stroke, slash heat exhaustion. And 56 people were hypothermia.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And so that's 8%. And that's mainly like above tree line. The temp swings can be up to or around 40 degrees Fahrenheit in an hour. It says.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Wet plus wind equals fastest onset. Right. So 19% of. I don't know what that word says. I don't actually know what WA stands for there. I would think Washington, but I'm not sure. Okay. Anyway, running on getting lost and exposure is 42 people. That's 6%.

[A]

I was going to guess that was way higher.

[B]

No, I guess not.

[A]

Those are. This is the availability heuristic at play.

[B]

But I would think that, like, it would be higher if they included hypothermia, because I would include hypothermia in this. And they separated it. This is 6%.

[A]

And hypothermia also just makes you unable to think. So you're probably more likely to get lost.

[B]

Right, Right, Exactly. So I guess this is getting lost while not cold. Yeah, getting lost.

[A]

Comfortable, Comfortably lost.

[B]

Comfortably lost, but not comfortable with being lost.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Dehydration and exposure. Once disoriented, most preventable with offline map. And telling someone you're rude. It's just like some stats there. And then 28 people. 4% with avalanche. Colorado and Utah account for most U.S. avalanche deaths. Backcountry snowshoers increasingly at risk.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Then 21 people or 3% is rockfall or terrain hazards. So loose canyon walls, unstable cliffs. North.

[A]

Every. You're listing all this stuff, and I'm just thinking of this specific place where I'm scared of the thing that you're describing.

[B]

And this is North Cascades rock quality is especially poor. Like, yeah, the North Cascades were sketchy.

[A]

No, it's part of the reason why I haven't done Long's peak is.

[B]

I've heard that I don't want to.

[A]

It's like that's a notorious place where people kick down rocks.

[B]

I have no interest.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Then eight people is for lightning on trail. That's 1.2% of hiker fatalities.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Exposed ridge lines and summits. Colorado 14ers are the most dangerous in the U.S. for it. Five or less than 1% is wildlife attack. Only five animal deaths on NPS land over eight years.

[A]

A number's probably higher since those.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That data was collected.

[B]

Grizzlies are most likely to be fatal. Yeah, and then 15 are undetermined. Around 2%. NPS classifies 14% of all park deaths as undetermined due to remote conditions. Yeah, so that's our list.

[A]

Okay. Ways to die in the backcountry Ways to die. Nice.

[B]

We're almost halfway through the year and a lot of people are running on empty without fully realizing it. Grow Therapy helps you find care that's covered by insurance before burnout becomes the baseline. Whether it's your first time in therapy or your 50th, grow makes it easier to find a therapist who fits you, not the other way around. They connect you with thousands of independent licensed therapists across the US Offering both virtual and in person sessions, nights and weekends. You can search by what matters like insurance, specialty, identity or availability and get started in as little as two days. And if something comes up, you can Cancel up to 24 hours in advance at no cost. There are no subscriptions, no long term commitments. You just pay per session. Grow helps you find therapy on your time. Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Grow accepts over 100 insurance plans, including Medicaid in some states. Sessions average about $21 with insurance and some pay as little as $0 depending on their plan. Visit growththerapy.com booknow to get started. That's growththerapy.com booknow growththerapy.com booknow availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan. I think when you're diagnosed with cancer, you crave a semblance of normalcy and control and so work allowed me to be me. So I think it's really important that companies stay flexible. Cancer in a diagnosis can be all consuming, but it doesn't have to be.

[A]

Research shows there is a significant connection between the ability to continue to work and cancer recovery. We can make work a better place

[B]

for healing, learn more, and sign the

[A]

[e-mail] to the TREC propaganda portion of today's show. This segues so well off of the bonus segment that we just ran. You'll have to tune in Thursday to get that, but I'm just gonna do one of these. I'm gonna do the news piece by Kelly this is Hikers Discover Human Remains near Vermont Appalachian Trail Hikers in Vermont's Green Mountain National Forest discovered what appeared to be hu human foot bones inside a partially buried pair of hiking boots late last month, prompting an investigation near Mount Taylor neighbor. A follow up search on May 4th turned up additional remains, outdoor gear and personal items Nearby, though authorities haven't said which. Whether the discovery was on or near the at. I don't know if that's been updated since.

[B]

Yeah, I want. I would like an update.

[A]

Yeah. But on the list of spooky things to discover while in the backcountry, finding a foot in a boot that feels like something straight out of a horror movie.

[B]

Yeah, I'm Googling it because I want to see if there's anything else. Of course. The first article is the Trek. Nice.

[A]

Hell, yeah. Love that.

[B]

It's from May 6th. What's happened since?

[A]

Yeah, I guess.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Question of the day. This might not be relevant to anyone but me, although I think just the older we get, at least the older that I get. And I know this is a stereotype of our parents age. Just being able to remember names in general, it becomes. My brain feels much more like Swiss cheese every single day. But it's especially bad with celebrity names. Like someone who's not a household name, whose name I've said out loud like three times in my life, and then I see their face and I recognize them. I can say the thing that they're in, but actually being able to pull out their name, it's getting harder every single year.

[B]

I've never been good at it. And this part's hard. Cause it's also. How do I describe them if I don't know their name? Like trying to describe a vague face that I remember.

[A]

Yeah. Jabba is surprisingly good at the celebrity recall thing. My buddy Alex Wysocki, he's an encyclopedia for this.

[B]

Garrett's good at it.

[A]

Not me, though. But is this. Is there a particular celebrity where, like, it doesn't matter how many times you've been like, oh, yeah, that's it. If I asked you the next day, it's gone.

[B]

Yeah, I. I thought we were doing this as a triple crown, so I came prepped with three.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

The girl who looks like Zooey Deschanel but isn't Zendaya. No, no, this is a girl that looks like her. She's got the same bangs face. They look so similar. Google. Google. Zooey Deschanel look alike. See, this is. I can't remember her.

[A]

Deschanel look alike. Celebr. Katy perry.

[B]

No.

[A]

Emily blunt. Isn't Emily Blunt. Jim from the office's wife.

[B]

She's. No, it's not her.

[A]

John Krasnowski. Is that right?

[B]

That's the guy that's. No, no, no. Not that woman.

[A]

Am I even thinking of the right person?

[B]

No.

[A]

Here we are. Actively Doing it. Oh, I got that part right. That Emily Blunt is Jim's.

[B]

What does she look like? No, that's not her. Then I don't think.

[A]

Yeah, I don't think that.

[B]

I thought Emily Blunt was the one in Devil Wears Prada.

[A]

I've never seen it. But she's in a Quiet Place, which I believe she also directed. Quiet Place? Is. Is that the name of it?

[B]

Wait, you're saying she was Jim's wife in a quiet place or in the office?

[A]

Jim's wife in a quiet place.

[B]

I think she. I haven't seen A Quiet place.

[A]

Did she direct that or John Krasnowski did?

[B]

Wait, show me what she looks like. It could be her then.

[A]

Now I have to know who directed it. I mean, it's not gonna help you because she's blonde there. I don't think they look that much alike, so I don't think that's correct.

[B]

Who's that girl? No, it's not her either. Okay. I don't know. I don't even know who it is. There's a girl that looks like her. She's got similar hair, and it's never Zoe. It's always this other woman. And she's in some stuff that I don't remember. And I don't remember her when she's there either. Yeah, so her.

[A]

My second one, quick aside, as I gather that you like horror movies. No, Scary movies.

[B]

No, I like things that have no conflict, have love, and are happy.

[A]

Okay. I don't like scary movies. Movies typically. I thought A Quiet Place was excellent.

[B]

Really?

[A]

It's really good.

[B]

I don't like scary movies typically, but I like ones that. I like ones that have a good plot like that, that are actually good in plot. I don't like jump scares. I think those are cheap tricks. And I don't like when they over rely on gore to make up for the fact that there's no substance in their plot.

[A]

A Quiet Place is literally like. Once the bad guys enter the equation, there's like no dialogue in the entire movie. It's like literally all plots, cinematography, just conceptually, just really unique. And well done, I thought.

[B]

Hmm. Okay, great, I'm in. Maybe I'll watch it one day. My next one. And this is. I wrote these down how I remember them because again, I can't remember their names. So I'm sorry that I'm sending us in a goose chase each time. The hot guy, I think his name starts with a J, he's a brunette, and he's in recent things.

[A]

I Don't even know what Recent Things is, but let's.

[B]

No, no, it's not. That's not the name of a movie. That's just like, he's in Things that are recent. Yeah, that's some hot guy with.

[A]

That's the worst of all time. I wouldn't even notice.

[B]

Hot actor.

[A]

John Ham.

[B]

Name? No, Jim.

[A]

John Kraskowski.

[B]

He's like a. He's got like a foreign name or something.

[A]

Oh, definitely not gonna be able to help you out then. Jean Claude Van Damme. Ah, Jimmy Carr.

[B]

I found him. Jacob Elordi. Jacob Elordi. He's in Euphoria.

[A]

Okay. Jacob Elordi. Elordi.

[B]

Every time. Every time. He sounds like an ad or something. I've never seen Euphoria, but I'm like, oh, who's that? And Garrett's like, that's Jacob Elordi. And I'm like, oh. And he's like, you know who that is? And then I'm like, okay. He's. There's just nothing really rememberable about his face.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

But it's not a bad one.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah.

[B]

I think he's in, like, stuff lately. Apparently he's like a name that I should know. According. I guess he's been on snl.

[A]

He looks like a darker haired version of the guy in the Hunger Games.

[B]

Oh, like a. Okay. I could see like a PETA.

[A]

Yeah, Peter.

[B]

Okay, great. And then my last one is the guy with the weird face who asked people to stop telling him he has a weird face?

[A]

Adam Driver.

[B]

No, this guy has like, he's got a very, like a rectangle kind of shaped head. And apparently people know he's young. People have been. He's. He's in that movie with the horns. And people keep being like, you're so weird looking. And then he did an interview where he was like, that hurts my feelings. I get it. I'm not attractive. Like, can we please stop pointing it

[A]

out Looking Head guy. Horns.

[B]

Like the animal horns? Yeah.

[A]

I'm getting weird results. I put in too many descriptors.

[B]

He's got like. Is his name. He's in. What's that movie? It's creepy. I didn't watch. There's like a mansiony looking house. People have like animal horns on their head. It's like an extravagant party kind of vibe, but also foggy and creepy.

[A]

With Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman.

[B]

I don't know. It was like a big thing for a minute, like the fleetingest of moments vibe.

[A]

Eyes Wide Shut. No, they're not horns. In that movie.

[B]

It's like deer horns or something. I don't know. Okay, what else is he in? Oh, he's. He was in. Oh, gosh, I just saw this. The Peaky Blinders. Not the show. But they just did the movie. They just did a movie with the something man. The. What was the name of the title?

[A]

The Immortal Man.

[B]

Yes, and he was the guy's son.

[A]

Tom Hardy.

[B]

No, that was Finn Cole.

[A]

I'm just going down the cast right now.

[B]

Peaky Blinders, Immortal man, son. Ah, Barry Keoghan, that guy.

[A]

Okay, I've never seen that guy's face in my life.

[B]

Sure you have. You don't forget this face.

[A]

Barry.

[B]

Barry Keoghan. You've never seen this man's face?

[A]

No. What else is he in?

[B]

The one with the animal horns in the creepy set. Where's his IMDb look at his face? You've never seen him?

[A]

I don't think so. And what else has he been in?

[B]

That's what I'm looking. Saltburn. That's the one. Saltburn. 2023.

[A]

I haven't.

[B]

I think they had.

[A]

Oh, Dunkirk. Did see Dunkirk, but I don't remember his face.

[B]

I thought they wore animal horns and stuff. Saltburn. Did I miss see a trailer?

[A]

Okay. Yeah. I mean he's got some interesting features for sure.

[B]

Yeah, well, apparently people have been mean to him and he went and did a thing where he was like, can you stop? Oh, look here, he's got the animal horns on. Look, I wasn't wrong.

[A]

Okay, See them? Yeah, I believe you. And see it.

[B]

You didn't.

[A]

No, I thought he said, I didn't see it looks like something out of a Headless Horseman. What's that? Okay, the. Yeah, I'm going to do mine.

[B]

Great.

[A]

I cheated because I had to look it up because otherwise we'd be doing this game.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Which apparently was, I guess, more helpful. Well, so I'll start with the one that I can never do. Like if you ask me to give me his name to give you his name tomorrow for like a million dollars, I won't be able to do it. And that is, for whatever reason, Jason Sudeikis. I always just call him Ted Lasso. Cuz I look at his face, I was about to say, and I just draw a fucking lasso. That is Ted Lasso. And for whatever reason, there's nothing Sudacus about him in my brain.

[B]

All lasso. Yeah, I agree.

[A]

The other one. This one I am now good at. I could. It'll probably take me a few seconds to pull out. But for whatever reason, Bradley Cooper was the hardest name for me to remember for the longest time. Even though he's in everything, he's a really good actor. Like, I. I like Bradley Cooper.

[B]

I like you. That's an easy one there.

[A]

Just something about him is not Bradley Cooper to me. Like, I want him to be John. Like, I want him to have a more basic name.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

And Bradley Cooper's a little too off the beaten path. And then the other one that I was struggling with immensely the other day is the. Not the lead character from Arrested Development, but the tall guy who's probably the funniest. He's got the deep voice. He does like truck commercials.

[B]

I don't think I've ever seen it.

[A]

You've never seen Arrest Development?

[B]

I probably have. I just can't picture it.

[A]

Will Arnett.

[B]

Show me. Is he the one in Bird Box that holds the woman's eyes open and makes her look out the window?

[A]

I don't think so. Will Arnet. Bird box. No, Bird box is the.

[B]

Oh, who's this guy then?

[A]

Will Annette does comedies, I think.

[B]

That's not him.

[A]

No, different. Very different.

[B]

Oh, show me his face again.

[A]

Let's go to the images page.

[B]

It's not the same person. It looked the same for a second. They're very different.

[A]

Yeah, but he also has a very popular podcast with. Oh, God damn it.

[B]

Can you not remember his name?

[A]

No, it's the other guy from Arrested Development and Jack from Will and Grace. Jason Bateman. Smart List is the name of the podcast. Anyways. I'm sure it was painful for people to listen to. That's why we're here. It's to ruin your day. Audibly. I'll come back to the thing of the week after. Let's do the triple Crown first.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Sponsored by ONX. Use code TREK70 for 70% off. A premium plan at Onyx Backcountry. Onyx Backcountry is the. I. I want you to participate. You're going to have to speculate a little bit here to make this work, but this is. This was inspired by a gift that we were given recently of. This is the triple crown of the worst gifts to give young kids.

[B]

You about to just shit all over a gift you got recently.

[A]

It was from another parent, so I think they might have done it in jest, but yeah, our. I think it was one of the twins, Oliver, I think, came home with a whistle.

[B]

That's bad.

[A]

It's so bad.

[B]

That's really bad.

[A]

It's like we Made the rule that you can only blow it outside. And I went out to throw the ball for Sierra in the yard or the, like the big field behind our house. And I'm far away from the house and all I can hear is just the fucking whistle blaring off in the distance. And three year olds don't understand rules. Rules don't really apply. Like, they get joy out of breaking rules. So they're blowing the whistle nonstop. The. I think Jenna ended up throwing the one whistle away and then they had a meltdown, so we got more whistles. So then both twins had whistles. And then finally I broke down and I just threw him away. But yeah, a whistle is an excruciating present from the parents perspective. Do not ever give a young kid a whistle. It's a nightmare.

[B]

I maybe, like, I'm not gonna speculate as much as I thought because one of mine was gonna be anything that makes noise.

[A]

I mean, kids love stuff that makes noise, so they're going to gravitate toward that. But the amount of decibels that the toy can produce is definitely indicative of how painful that toy is going to be for the parent. Like, there's. To be a parent, you just have to be ready to be going through a torture chamber at most times, especially when they're young. Like, I've been listening to the Moana soundtrack non stop for four years now. Thankfully, it's a very good soundtrack. But any song on repetition that much is going to drive you crazy. That compared to a whistle is like music to my ears. A whistle for anything longer than a couple seconds is a real. It's a pow tactic.

[B]

Yeah. Well, that. Yeah, that sounds like a situation I wouldn't want to be in.

[A]

It's not good.

[B]

Sorry.

[A]

It's not good.

[B]

My first one is going to be stickers.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because stickers never go in a book or where you think that they should go. Stickers go on windows and on cabinets and on bedroom doors and lampshades, and they don't come off that easily. And they're gonna leave residue or take things with them and. Yeah. So if you hate your house stickers,

[A]

the good kid stickers are not that sticky for that exact reason. Because stickers don't. They're never. They never land where they're intended. Jenna just took a photo of my back the other day, and I didn't even know, but one of the kids had stuck like 14 stickers to my shirt. Like, I would have gone around the rest of the day just having stickers on My shirt, not knowing it. But yeah, kids, when we go to the doctor's office, it's just a bowl of stickers. Like, kids always love stickers.

[B]

I love stickers, but I get sticker fatigue.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Which is hard with, like, Nalgenes and things these days.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

My yeti cooler has not one sticker on it because I just can't commit.

[A]

The. The good kid stickers, like, come in sheets, and they're not that sticky. They're easy to pull off the thing because that way you don't have to, like, sit there and individually peel them off and give them to your kid. Like, they can get to it. But yeah, they come off pretty easily. Like, the stickers that you can buy in most places for adults, quote, unquote. That is not a good gift for a kid because. Yeah, that'll get stuck to a window and then you've got a problem on your hand.

[B]

Right? Yeah. Okay, my next one is going to be. Trying to figure out how specific I should be. Okay. I'm gonna say it, and then I'm gonna narrow it down to the story. Anything really sweet. Like an edible sweet thing. Like candy. Yeah, like candy. Or like a baked good. Like a brownie or like, cake or anything that's gonna get them just like, all jazz.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Or like anything that implies that they would have any level of, like, self preservation. For example, I got a gumball. Like, it was like a make. Make your own gum factory kit, whatever. And it just. It came with gum. You just put it into these little molds that, like, shaped it. Like, it just took a piece of gum and basically just cookie stamped a shape on it, and it was like a play kit. Now you have your gum. Right. Like, that's how cheap the entertainment was. Because you were young. Said, fuck this, I just ate all the gum. And so I remember sitting on the couch with what it was an entire box factory's worth of gum to produce with just in my mouth at the same time. And I couldn't chew. I couldn't close my mouth. It was just like, gooing out because it was just like saliva that I couldn't swallow. I could have choked.

[A]

Yeah, that sounds like a lock draw sensitivity.

[B]

I should have choked. Who left me unattended with it.

[A]

Yeah. It's. In hindsight, I had to pull it

[B]

out with my hand and then, like, because I was the person who swallowed my gum.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I was trying to swallow it all, and I couldn't get it down, so I had to pull it out and break it into Bits. So I could swallow it bit by bit.

[A]

Yeah. The content around kids choking on stuff is plentiful. Once you get into that algorithm, you learn about all the things that are choking hazards for kids. I actually don't remember if gum is one of them, but I don't think most people are giving their kids gum.

[B]

No, exactly. What a terrible gift.

[A]

And if you're consuming gum in that quantity, yeah, that seems a bad idea.

[B]

And it also overlaps into. I don't think you're going to have this one, but if you are, we can just, like, cut it. But I think gum overlaps into the slime category where, like, that's going to go in the carpet. It's not coming out.

[A]

Yeah. No, no, no. The whole thing about being a parent, especially to young kids, is recognizing problems before they become problems. Prevention is the name of the game.

[B]

I got slime once, and then I got it taken away so fast. And the carpet had a stain.

[A]

Yeah. No, our carpet looks like hell. We don't. To the point it's disgusting and we have no thoughts of replacing it just because it's going to get worse.

[B]

Yeah, we.

[A]

We can't get nice stuff at our house because everything gets ruined.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Okay. Slimy stuff. Gum for sure. My next one is kind of in the same vein as a carpet ruiner, but really any marker that doesn't wash out of everything very easily. You can keep kids contained to a certain space and give them paper to go draw and stuff. And then, like, as soon as you go off to go to the bathroom or just do anything where you're not on top of them. I've caught my kids, like, with markers drawing on the walls. They literally will draw on the carpet, and they know that it's wrong. We're talking about the twins. Leo's a good boy, but they just love to. They're little cavemen. They want to leave their mark on things. They're doing hieroglyphics everywhere they can on the house. And most of the time, like, kids, markers are made because they know that kids are cavemen. They wash out pretty easily. But occasionally you get some of the cheap stuff and you have to scrub and it just leaves a residue. So, yeah, markers that aren't extremely water soluble. Soluble suck as a parent.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that's an easy one. Your turn again.

[A]

Last one for me. I do have one honorable mention.

[B]

I do, too.

[A]

Really? Any toy that has more than, like, eight parts, if it requires a lot of pieces for the toy to operate, it's going to get lost. It's going to get lost really quickly. It doesn't matter how organized you are. Maybe I'm just speaking to people who have young boys because I imagine girls aren't quite as bad. But things get thrown. Things get. Temper tantrum. They move from the upstairs to the basement and back from the basement to the upstairs. Like, you just never know where anything is. And then once you've got 80% of a toy, you might as well have 0% of the toy.

[B]

Like they.

[A]

It becomes a meltdown because it's not able to function properly. And then you get 15 of those toys where they have a bunch of pieces. Before you know it. Your house is just like a peace farm. You have all these individual plastic pieces that don't make sense and just compile on top of each other. You're living in a dumpster of chaos. And yeah, I'm describing my house to.

[B]

Yeah, sounds personal.

[A]

Yeah. No, nothing brings me more satisfaction than just throwing all these things into a bag and taking it to Goodwill because the clutter in my house does not jive with my through hiker sensibilities of trying to keep things simple and light.

[B]

Yeah. I wish I knew where all of my stuffed animals and things that I had love for went, because I think my parents were of the same mindset where they just threw it out. Like, we gotta get rid of this shit.

[A]

I'm glad that goodwill exists because I

[B]

would still have it today.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

All eight of my stuffed animal dogs that were not real.

[A]

I understand the struggle. And only a small fraction. When you first have kids, you want to spoil them and give them all the stuff. And then all of a sudden, like, you've got friends and family that are giving them gifts and like, we've just stopped giving our kids gifts altogether. We'll get them like a nice thing. Like we got them a trampoline for the twins birthday. Do stuff like that occasionally. But like in terms of getting the small stuff that you get at a grocery store, at a toy store, or on Amazon, like, we've just stopped it all together, but friends and family haven't gotten the memo. And we still just collect plastic shit.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. My last one is small animals. Like. Like a fish that goes in a bowl and not like a regulated tank. Like a bowl where you have to actually change the bowl water daily. That fish is dying. Hermit crabs, I've suffered through those. They don't die. Snails. I loved snails growing up because I was allergic to things with fur. And so in school we had a snail like Farm, whatever. And then you got to take home a snail at the end of the teaching lesson thing. Well, I was a teacher's pet, and so I got to take home two snails. Cause they were extras. So then I had my two snails, and then I was playing with them in the porch, and I lost a snail. And then my teacher gave me a snail to replace the snail I lost. And then I had two snails again. And then I think at the very end, there was, like, some unclaimed snails. So maybe she gave me one more. And then I had three snails. Then I found the fourth snail, AKA the first second snail, under the plastic, like, Fisher Price desk. And then I had four snails.

[A]

Snail zoo.

[B]

Then the snails had babies. And there were hundreds of these baby snails, all in this tank. The clearest shells. Like, it was like, see through. It was so cool. And I think around then is when my dad snapped. Because I came home one day and my snail tank was not there. And he was outside washing it out with a hose. And I asked him where my snails went, and he just said, away.

[A]

At least with snails, you can just put them outside. And I assume.

[B]

I don't know what he did with them. Yeah, I don't imagine where he put them.

[A]

It's not like. I don't know, it's not like a dog or something like that where, like, if you just leave it outside, you're basically killing it, or something bad is going to happen to it. With this snail, I feel like it's like, all right, this is where I live now.

[B]

Yeah, but he's also, like. He's also like, an avid vegetable gardener. Is he about to release hundreds of snails in his own yard? Absolutely not. Right? Because they eat leaves and shit. So now you think, where did he put the snails? This is unresolved. He's gonna listen to this. He's never given me the real answer on where the snails went. Yeah, but you don't want to do that, because then your kid's gonna be 34, sitting on a freaking podcast talking about these snails that she's never gotten over. Cause she's never had closure. Yeah, Just don't get them a small pet.

[A]

Speaking of good books. Good books, good gifts for kids. Books. Books is the best.

[B]

And especially when on the front. Like, when you open the front cover, and that's where you write your card. So it's like, leo, Happy birthday. Love, Zach. You know, Then you immortalize it, and then. Yeah, it's always in the book when they open it. And it's cute. You Put a little date on there.

[A]

I'm always happy. And now when I give kid gifts to friends or whatever, it's always a book. Because all three of her boys love books. Books don't get old. It's not like an odd distraction. Some of the books are a little gimmicky. Like, when this stuff, like, pops up, if you've got young boys, they're gonna rip that shit right out. And then that becomes a problem. So the more simple. Let the. Let the content of the book speak for itself. When there's, like, buttons that you push where it makes noise like that's gonna break, and then that's gonna become a problem. Just pick good books. But to your point about gardens, I learned recently through one of Leo's books that apparently ladybugs are amazing for garden gardens.

[B]

Yeah, they are.

[A]

They eat all the aphids.

[B]

Yeah. And you want to. You there's certain plants that you can get that attract ladybugs.

[A]

Yeah. And I guess, like, farms in California were introducing them by, like, the tens of thousands to help, like, save their crops as opposed to using pesticides.

[B]

That's cool. Kids. Books with a. Yeah, you learn things. Yeah, that's good.

[A]

Sweet. My one honorable mention is just like, cheap toys from Amazon that are made in China because when you open them and they first work, they're really cool. But because they're cheap, they're not made well, and they break instantly. And then going the fall off from going to a toy that they really like to it not functioning is that gap is greater than the joy that they get from not ever having it to receiving it. So you've created more net disappointment than anything else. So, yeah, just. I understand it's tempting to get cheap gifts again, just go for the book, please. For the love of God. Books are the best.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And these cheap toys suck. There's also one toy in particular. God, what is the name of it? It's just like a sharp dragon. I think it's a 3D printed toy.

[B]

A sharp dragon.

[A]

Yes. So, yeah.

[B]

What is he?

[A]

I don't know. But somehow we've gotten three of those. So I imagine that they're pretty common. I think they come from 3D printers. I'm not entirely sure. But that is a fucking terrible toy because all toys just get left out on the ground.

[B]

If you step on that, you're dying.

[A]

I've stepped on it multiple times. Jenna's actually, like, cut her skin open. These things are fucking like. Yeah. It's like putting a grenade on the ground or bear Trap or something.

[B]

I hate that.

[A]

Yeah. Do not get here on Amazon specifically. Large 3D printed dragon.

[B]

Yes. This is a thing.

[A]

This is a 30 inch that don't

[B]

get any size 30 inch large dragon.

[A]

Yeah. These 3D printed dragons are the fucking bane of every parent's existence. Do not get that. Cool. I'm Kiana and I leveled up my business with Shopify. Once I figured out that Shopify was a thing, I never turned back. I can create a site with my eyes closed. Shopify thinks ahead of us and it thinks about the customer more than anything. Every day I'm thinking about some other new business, but Shopify is doing it to me because it's so easy to use. It's like, I can't stop. I'm addicted. Start your free [e-mail].

[B]

we all prefer things a certain way. Like groceries. If you want groceries just how you like them, you gotta try Instacart. They have a new preference picker that lets you pick how ripe or unripe you want your bananas. Shoppers can see your preferences upfront, helping guide their choices. Because when it comes to groceries, the details matter. Instacart. Get groceries just how you like.

[A]

I do have a thing of the week. Okay, I think I've been alluding to this for a few episodes now. This is. Rachel wrote it in his parenting thing of the Week. I'm gonna call it Stupid Thing of the Week.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But there was some thing where Leo was talking to us at night and he was just, like, doing a fib about something normal for a kid of his age to do. But I was trying to impress upon him that lying is not good. And I did so with the old tale, the Boy who Cried Wolf. And as I'm telling the story, I realized that I don't really remember the story. So, as is often the case here in this podcast, like, I have the overall concepts down, but, like, some of the details I'll miss. So I'm telling him.

[B]

How do you remember the plot? It's all in the name.

[A]

Well, so I know I have the concept of the boy lying about a wolf.

[B]

He keeps saying, the wolf comes to get the sheep and goes down to town, and the town people come to help, but there's no wolf.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Then finally the wolf comes and he goes down to the town people, and then they don't come because they don't believe him. And then the wolf gets all the sheep.

[A]

Yes. So vaguely I had that. A key ingredient that I missed in the story was the sheep. What I Had remembered it that he was on the outskirts of town and wolf was coming to get him. He cried wolf. The townspeople came and rescued him. Did it again.

[B]

Why would he keep going back to the edge of town?

[A]

Well, it's an old fable. People come out. The third time he goes out, he encounters a wolf. He yells townspeople to come save him. They don't come, and the wolf eats them. And just like the look of terror in his eyes. So I think conceptually, I drove home the importance of not lying, because people will stop believing you. I think my version of it was a little too amazing.

[B]

Did you lie you're gonna get eaten by a wolf at night?

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

So did he pass up?

[A]

We had already gone over that lying was bad before then. I was just using that story to illustrate the point.

[B]

Right. Really driving.

[A]

But then he actually corrected me because apparently that's something that he had been taught in school. He's like, dad, I thought there were sheep in that story. And Jenna's like, yeah, there are sheep in that story. I'm like, all right, I'm going to bed.

[B]

Yeah, that's so funny.

[A]

But he was a little terrified. But he's. He's old enough and smart enough to know how I messed this story up. So, yeah, that was my. We'll call it parenting thing of the week.

[B]

Definitely picture you sitting there being like, oh. And then the wolf ate him. The end.

[A]

I, like, I looked at Jenna before I delivered the end, and I'm like, I don't think this is going to go well. I, like, I knew what I was going to say. It was atrocious. But that's the best version of it that I could remember. Was the wolf eating the boy?

[B]

So funny.

[A]

So, yeah, don't lie, kids. The wolf will get you, mailbag. Nope, I lied. I have a sun hoodie. This is technically the second sun hoodie that I've reviewed. I'll have another one in next week's episode with Jabba. This is the Packa. Geez. What's the name of it?

[B]

It looks soft.

[A]

It is very soft. That is the best feature of this. Hold on. The sole hoodie by Pakka mine weighs at 9.6 ounces. This is the large. All of the sun hoodies I'm testing are larges. Price points. 99. This is in the middle of the three kind of foreshadowing next week's episode. But this one is cheaper than the north face that I've already reviewed. As Chaunce mentioned, you can feel it. It's very soft and this is after a wash and me wearing it a few times and it's. I want to say it's like 17%. What is this specific wool? I don't want to get this wrong because this is like a, it's a very high end. It's not just regular merino. Oh gosh.

[B]

Where is it? Alpaca by the name Paca.

[A]

It is alpaca, but royal alpaca, apparently

[B]

it's like a specific royal alpaca.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Of the royal lineage, I guess.

[A]

Apparently that's like a, a really high quality alpaca wool. So to give it the proper wool testing, I wore it on a run and then the next day we went on that hike with over at Galbraith and then. Was that all I did before I washed it? I had back to back sweating events in it and it didn't stink. I've since washed it because I think I left it in a pile and was starting to get nasty for that reason. But it passes the wool test. Even though it's only a small percentage of alpaca, it's only 14%, which for like a alpaca blend is on the low side. From my research, I think because it is such a high quality alpaca, it doesn't need as much wool to get like the benefits of being anti odor and all that good stuff. The Tencel is a really good fabric for heat, for a natural fabric, and it's really soft. That being said, for hot weather hiking, which is again the context for which I'm testing these in. And I think what's important to a three season backpacker, this one's just too hot for me. Like it doesn't. Yeah, it wicks the moisture well, but it holds on to it. So when you get sweaty it just holds on to that moisture, which is like cooling compared to cotton, but compared to like a thinner polyester fabric where it actually like removes it and it will evaporate faster. It just, it just sits too hot for me.

[B]

It feels like a very nice sit on the couch and watch a movie fabric.

[A]

Yeah, I mean for like a cooler like early fall or even like for today's weather, I think this would be a really good piece. Yeah, this definitely has a place. I think overall this is a nice piece. Again, just for the context of like hot PCT CDT style through hiking, this would be too hot for me. But overall nice piece. I just personally would not opt into this one.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I was impressed with the quality of this. I'd heard a lot about it. And lived up John's boobs. What? I forgot what I gave.

[B]

I did, too.

[A]

The. Oh, the REI piece, I think. I don't want to say what I gave because that's the next episode I'm going to. This one I like better than the REI. I think it's probably warmer than the REI one.

[B]

Even

[A]

5.3 chance boobs.

[B]

All right, this is fun.

[A]

I haven't retroactively graded the North Face one. These are all subject to change because I'm still testing.

[B]

Did we not grade the North Face one, I thought?

[A]

No, because it was the first one that I did. I didn't have enough context to give it a comparative situation. I'm gonna go with 7.1. Tron's boobs. So that one's in the lead right now. I'm gonna go. When I get to, like, my top five, I'm gonna start to cycle through those top five over and over again so I can get a better idea of durability. And, like, this is limited with me just using it in small amounts. I have 14 or 18 of these to test, so that's the reason for that. But, yeah, that's where we are.

[B]

You can give us the chance. Boot, but you can take it away.

[A]

True. Okay, no bag.

[B]

Episode number 143 made a contractor. I think I was watching porn in my work truck, but I still love you guys. Oh. Oh, hold on. I didn't read that with the right cadence. Episode 143 made a contractor think I was watching porn in my work truck, but I still love you guys. That sounds more better.

[A]

That makes sense.

[B]

Hi, Zach. Parentheses. Zach with a K. Question mark. I'm not going to bother to look it up. Which is correct, because this gives me an excuse to tell you I have a friend Zach with an H, who says Zachs with an H are superior to Zachs with a K. And I'd like to hear your input. And CH as a Zach with an

[A]

H. I would agree with that, friend. Friend.

[B]

Garrett's very particular about the two Rs, two Ts, and like, really does not like a one. Ted Garrett.

[A]

Sure. I. I'm sure people that up all the time too.

[B]

Yeah. Fun.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And Chance, I don't know if that meant he wanted my opinion, too. I agree. The age is less. It's just less like McKay's kind of case dated just looks a little more mean. I discovered BPR as one of the ultimate results of YouTube suggesting Liz Kidder's 2025 PCT hike videos. Love her you should have her back on again. Which I followed fervently all summer. I'd never realized backpacking had come far technology wise and was something one could do without suffering immensely. Under a 50 pound plus pack at 5 3, that's like 40% of my body weight as a West coast native. I hope to take my first backpacking trip this summer and hopefully try out the Timberline Trail.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

It's like two hours from me and PCT in 2027.

[A]

Hell yeah.

[B]

Naturally, after listening to her episode, I started at episode one and have been religiously knocking out two to three episodes a day, Monday through Friday at work. Oh my God. I am an underground utility locator. One of those people who is summoned when someone calls 811 and draws the rainbow hieroglyphs on the ground so contractors know where the utilities are and don't dig into gas mains or take out the Internet power. Honestly, people that listen to this are really cool.

[A]

I didn't even know 811 was the thing.

[B]

I didn't even know.

[A]

Wait, what do you call 811 for?

[B]

I don't know. I didn't want to say it because I didn't want to sound like I don't know things.

[A]

Oh yeah, I'm an idiot.

[B]

What does it mean?

[A]

In The United States, 811 is the national call before you dig phone number. Anyone planning on what an excavation project, whether it's a large construction job or a simple backyard project like planting trees or installing a mailbox. Mailbox. Must call 811 or visit 811 before you dig website. The more you know that.

[B]

Have you ever called anyone before digging?

[A]

Yeah, totally. All the time.

[B]

Yeah, I. Every time I learned that before moving into my new house.

[A]

Yeah, I thought I'm not doing too much digging, in fairness.

[B]

Yeah, I guess so. But okay.

[A]

I mean, I definitely never mind anyway.

[B]

And drive around from work site to work site spraying paint on the ground. Podcasts are nice when you don't want to end up sick of your own music. When a road trip comes around, I have no plans to skip ahead and see if you end up reading this on air. So it'll be like three months at the earliest before I get to hear this. By which time my uneducated ADHD ass will probably have forgotten I sent this, which will be absolutely hilarious. I am now on episode 143, and while I have enjoyed every episode, I don't think I've laughed harder than I did during this one. Especially during the shaming trance segment. I didn't remember we had that. Sorry Trance, I love you. You are my spirit animal and I admire that you put yourself out there and do hilarious shit despite your insecurities. Also, give me all the money in your wallet.

[A]

I'm kicking myself for not having the iPad plugged in right now.

[B]

I'm literally loving it. Now on to the title story. I got to a job site in the middle of the Orgasms with Olive Garden segment. Wish I could remember that. Unplugged my phone, did my thing, came back to the truck as Apple CarPlay as Zach knows and hates likes to autoplay the second you plug your phone in. While annoying, this normally isn't an issue because I work alone. Except this time.

[A]

Oh, I think it's the audio clip we have of you.

[B]

Oh, the pasta? No, because that was when I was eating pasta that I had at Garrett's house. Yeah, it wasn't in Olive Garden.

[A]

I don't remember.

[B]

Anyway, except this time I was bringing a contractor over to look at some utility maps on my work laptop. I plugged my phone in, Chaunce moaned it is that Chance moaned. I yelled it's not porn, it's a hiking podcast and she just really likes pasta. Thankfully the blue collar world is full of dirt bags and he just asked me if work had really been that stressful and ran off probably to tell his buddies the locator was flicking the bean in the work truck. But it's fine. I'll only be back here at least once a month for the next until I quit to hike the PCT. Bonus non hiking poop story 811 usually has a 2 business day response time but sometimes happens after hours like drunk people crashing into power poles and sewer lines backing up. That requires an emergency locate so every couple of months I go on call and get summoned to say to set emergencies should they arise. Pros it's double time and usually just like one to three hours of paid driving with maybe 20 minutes of actual work. Cons Drunk people like to hit polls at 2am so you're often woken up out of a dead sleep and you can't drink or go too far from home for the week for obvious reasons. One time I got called out to the middle of a middle of the night pole emergency on Hood river on the Oregon side of the Columbia, a bit east of Cascade Locks. It's about a two hour drive, mostly down a dark rural highway so I got a 711 coffee on the way. All was well until I got to the emergency and got out of the truck I could feel gravity ignited by the 20 ounce concoction of a 711 latte. I chugged on the way take immediate effect on my guts. Mercifully, I did not have to mark anything and was back in the truck within five minutes, cheeks clenched. However, it was still 2am and I was still on the side of a country road. The surrounded by flashy light trucks miles from any known bathroom, I took off looking for any turnout that wasn't just someone's driveway. Maybe 10 minutes later, which is approximately 69420 years and I'm going to ship my pants. Time I found a little road with a dozen mailboxes at the front. Perfect. I pulled into the conveniently placed parking spot in front of the mailboxes, shut my lights off, took my high vis vest off and shoveled into the woods as fast as one can. With straight legs and an aspect clenched tight enough to turn coal into diamonds. I made it maybe 10ft into the woods before yanking my pants down and unleashing a torrent of liquid. The kind of shit that if taken on a toilet would just sound like you were peeing. Instantly felt better though, so that's nice. Wish that was the end of it. Frowny face in my hurry to not in my truck, I didn't grab any of the emergency napkins. Anyone who has ever worked a job where the main bathroom is a porta Potty knows is superior to the 0.5 ply those things are stocked with. I switched on my phone's flashlight and turned around looking for a leaf or something so I didn't have to choose between pulling up my pants over an unwiped ass or hobbling back to the truck with my pants around my knees. I turned around only to see a trail camera. It had seen everything. Horrified, I stumbled back to my truck, hoping with every fiber of my being that the mailboxes, trees and night had been enough to obscure the logo on my truck. I was too anxious to pull over and wipe my ass, so I just drove home, ran the world's smallest load of laundry and took a shower. Spent the next week waiting for the come to the office that you haven't been to since your first day when you picked up your truck at the end of the day phone call. It never came, but there is a chance someone out there has a video of me pissing chunky chocolate milk out of my ps. One time Zach asked if something on TV I think one of the Love is Blind spin offs was dubbed and now I have to ask Zach, are you A secret Weeb. If yes, what is your favorite anime? I don't know. What's a Weeb?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Love you guys. Chaunce. I'm sorry if this email spawns the resurgence of those sound bites. Not really. They're hilarious. From Cassie. Thank you, Cassie. That was incredible.

[A]

Weeb is Internet slang for a non Japanese person who has an obsessive interest in Japanese culture, especially anime, manga and video games. That's not me. I don't even know the reference there, but holy shit. That is in the triple crown of listener emails. The story's amazing and it's incredibly written. Cassie, you're my hero.

[B]

Yeah. That was wonderful. I'm sorry for making your co workers think you were listening to porn. I do just really like pasta.

[A]

That is just such a well written shit story.

[B]

Yeah. Which makes me think now that we'll have more free time in our hands, we should revisit that pooping in the world woods because that one does.

[A]

Yeah, that would be the lead story for sure.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Thank you, Cassie. You're awesome. Five star review. Also, you guys can reach us podcast at the Trek Co if you want to send us a note or go to backpacker radio.com to the submit a mail feature. Okay. This one is from home skillet 503. Stick to hiking. I am writing to thank you for the hiking content but ask that you try to keep your very wrong thoughts on medicine, health, nutrition to yourselves. At the very least you could provide a mainstream health provider on provide fact slash evidence based advice. Some of the very wrong advice on vitamin supplements could be actually harmful. For example in town electrolytes is wasteful at best and renal toxic at worst. I've learned so much from you all about hikes and gear. I just wish the cringe of discussing matters that you are not qualified to discuss would at least tone down. That is from home skillet 503. Thank you so much for the review. You guys can have your review. I should probably address that first.

[B]

Yeah. You can say anything you want about us as long as it has five stars.

[A]

Yeah. I have to imagine this is in reference to element.

[B]

Well, yeah. For example, daily electrolytes is wasteful at best and renal toxic at worst.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is it wasteful?

[A]

How the. Yeah. If you have enough electrolytes in your system and you're consuming an electrolyte supplement, it's. You're not actually like you're just peeing it out.

[B]

What if that is your electrolyte supplement?

[A]

If you're not. If you are Deficient in electrolytes, then you are supplementing it. Then again, I'm not a doctor. Let me preface this. I'm not a doctor, I'm not a nutrition expert. I don't have any specialty in any of this stuff. So anything that I say, yeah, I

[B]

guess I'm doing exactly what they're mad about.

[A]

Just flush it down the toilet.

[B]

But okay, but how come you can have caffeine every day and soda and that's fine, but like, if you have an electrolyte and you're not supposed to, like, you're going to have a renal collapse.

[A]

Again, I'm not a doctor, so I'm not going to directly comment on this, but to my understanding, I'm assuming the reference to daily in town is from us promoting the sparkling cans, which has 500 milligrams of sodium, which is the amount of sodium in like a tortilla or a large pickle. So like, I guess it is possible if somebody has kidney disease and they consume sodium at that level, it could possibly create issues. I'm not a doctor, but the same is true for a whole host of foods. Like a half a gram of sodium is in so many things that we eat. To say that an element can is the thing that pushes you over the edge. I don't know, it doesn't make sense to me.

[B]

I just think we've given worse medical advice. So that's just a weird one to pin.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, I will say if you are eating a high sodium diet and you're not exercising, you probably don't need any electrolyte supplement, period. We try to promote this as a backpacking supplement and a hangover supplement.

[B]

I stand by that. Yeah, that helps me immensely.

[A]

I'll just speak for myself personally. Don't put anything in your body without talking to a doctor, which I am not. But it makes me feel way better. I sweat a lot, I go to the gym a lot, I'm in the sauna a lot. I sweat a lot when I exercise. I've had hyponatremia and I can say with great confidence that I feel better when I am consuming this stuff. In that context again, if you have issues with sodium, definitely talk to your doctor. This may be not the right thing for you. They're not a sponsor of today's episode. But just personally speaking, I have had hyponatremia from a salt imbalance of not having enough salt and element has been a benefit to my life. And I'm sure there's lots of people where it could have an opposite effect. Speak to your doctor. We're not doctors.

[B]

Yeah. At least I learned today that electrolytes are controversial. I didn't know that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So, yeah, thanks.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. And if you have feedback again, as long as it has five stars, we'll read it. We're not. We're not hiding. No hiding. Hiding it or scared of it or. I don't know, I'm a little scared of it.

[A]

We're not bearing any five stars here.

[B]

No five stars, though, because, you know, it's a give and take. If you're going to give us. We have to take five stars, for sure.

[A]

And if you screenshot review, email us podcastrek co. We'll send you a Backpacker radio sticker. That goes for you, too. A skillet. Thank you for listening. That is it for today's show. Thank you so much for listening and happy hiking.

[B]

Bye.

[A]

You're not the boss of me, all right? Well, technically, Charlie, I am the boss of you because I own half your shares. You sold me half your shares of

[B]

the bar for goods and services.

[A]

Wait, wait a second. You've definitely given me half your shares, too. Dude, maybe I gave you guys a couple shares. My back was against the wall. I needed a little breathing room. Bro, you gave me a shitload of shares one time for a half a sandwich. What are you guys doing? Is this a hose job where you're hosing me down? Dude, you hose yourself down.

[B]

You hose yourself up.

[A]

What do you want me to do? I don't care. Yeah, get a job. Oh, get a job. Yeah, just get a job. Why don't I strap up my job helmet and squeeze down into a job cannon and fire off into job land where jobs grow on jobies. Now, we're wasting time.

[B]

We can just get out of here.

[A]

You want me going to walk? Come on, just walk. I can't stand you guys.

[B]

I've been out walking snow many miles

[A]

I've yet to go Never been one that's had to choose but every time I do I find I lose I guess I'm a loser stomping ground A welcome man for the loving crowd.

[B]

Instacart understands that not all bananas are created equal. Some people want them green, some want them ripe, Some want them ready right now with Instacart's Preference Picker, now available at most retailers. You can choose how you like certain items, like banana ripeness, deli thickness, even avocados before your shopper even starts. So instead of crossing your fingers and hoping for the best, you get groceries picked the way you would pick them. It's a small thing, but it makes a big difference. Download the app and get bananas just how you like with Instacart.

[A]

Marketing is hard, but I'll tell you a little secret. It doesn't have to be. Let me point something out. You're listening to a podcast right now and it's great. You love the host. You seek it out and download it. You listen to it while driving, working out, cooking, even going to the bathroom. Podcasts are a pretty close companion. And this is a podcast ad. Did I get your attention? You can reach great listeners like yourself with podcast advertising from Libsyn Ads. Choose from hundreds of top podcasts offering host endorsements or run a pre produced ad like this one across thousands of shows. To reach your target audience in their favorite podcasts with Libsyn ads, go to Libsynads.com that's L I B S Y N ads.com today.