Vibin' & Spiralin' with Alessandra

Summary

Barely Famous — "Vibin' & Spiralin' with Alessandra"

Host: Kail Lowry
Guest: Alessandra
Date: December 19, 2025

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Main Theme & Purpose

This episode features an intimate, candid conversation between host Kail Lowry and her close friend Alessandra, delving into the heaviness of 2025, the personal and societal toll of current events, the struggle to engage authentically on social media, boundaries around political expression, managing burnout, and the essence of “just surviving.” The episode blends raw vulnerability and humor, touching on everything from reproductive health and internet scrutiny to confessional fantasies and future travel plans, ending with a call for kindness and open-mindedness.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Catching Up: The Weight of 2025 & Burnout

• Alessandra shares that after coming out of depression in 2023, 2025 felt heavy “for everyone.” Both she and Kail discuss the cumulative impact of world events and working so closely together, blurring the line between professional and personal realms.
• “We collectively have had a really hard 2025.” (Alessandra, 05:20)
• Burnout from content creation and the inability to engage meaningfully becomes a central struggle.
• Kail: "I can't show up on socials the same way I used to... I want to contribute something. I don't want to be on the Internet just to be on the Internet." (08:06)

2. Women’s Health & Tracking Cycles

• The duo discusses the reality of women’s cycles, the lack of public awareness, and practical tracking for energy and health.
• Alessandra: "Ovulation is when supposedly we have, like, the most energy. We're feeling the most confident in our bodies." (03:09)
• They touch on apps, PCOS, not being on birth control, and how easily misinformation abounds.

3. Impact of the World & Social Media on Personal Wellbeing

• Both talk about the struggle of witnessing violence and suffering—especially that which feels close to home.
• “People are like, you’re not directly threatened, but to constantly, every single day, be bombarded with news... be ripped apart and just like, just disgusting, violent rhetoric. I mean, I really don't want to cry because my makeup. We have to go later today, but... It was really, really hard for me.” (Alessandra, 08:53)
• The emotional toll of being vocal online: hate, death threats, and the polarization of discourse.

4. Responsibility & Risk for Creators Speaking Out

• Navigating when and how to use platforms to speak on political and social issues, especially for people of color.
• Alessandra: “If you have a platform, you should... I should know as a person who I am supporting what they believe in.” (18:13)
• Risk of financial loss and safety concerns complicate decisions about “speaking up.”
• Kail: "It's tricky... I'm not knowledgeable enough... So I align with it. Let me align myself with someone who knows how to word it, because I'm not super great." (22:31)
• White allies’ potential: “White people are more apt to listen to white people.” (Alessandra, 17:54)

5. The Internet as a Hostile, Draining Space

• Frustration and exhaustion with the current online culture where everyone is offended, and good faith conversation is rare.
• Alessandra: "I genuinely believed that, like, the majority of people were good. And I have to say, this year has really, really challenged that belief for me." (14:05)
• Kail: "It's not a super friendly, fun place anymore. It's a very, it's very heavy." (21:32)

6. Societal Shifts: Education & Policy

• Brief discussion on political events (e.g., defunding of the Department of Education).
• The devastation of attacks on professional women, teacher shortages, and the decline of public education.
• Alessandra: "If you want to control a populace, you're going to control their education. And it makes sense that that's what they're going for." (24:32)

7. Finding Escape & Managing Stress

• “That's why I'm reading 10 to 12 books a month... when I have any downtime, I'm not doing anything else.” (Alessandra, 27:21)
• Book buying, avoiding social media, and talking candidly about using distractions to cope.

8. Random, Relatable Tangents & Friendship Dynamics

• Pet dreams (birds, Great Danes, highland cows), unlikely business ideas (petting zoos), sports parenting woes, and the real work-life blend for creators.
• Kail recalls failed attempts at sports as a child and her current lighthearted advocacy for women’s sports.
• The crew jokes about trading jobs within their “Killer Network,” revealing their camaraderie.

9. Parenting & TMI Moments

• Funny-yet-informative segments about boys’ hygiene (“jock itch”), raising both boys and girls, and confessions about not knowing everything as parents.
• Brief, frank discussion about bodies and sex, as always filtered through their trademark humor.

10. Self-Reflection, Confession & Acceptance of Chaos

• “None of us know what the [expletive] we're doing. We just wing it and hope for the best.” (Alessandra, 52:28)
• Honest confessions (theoretical, not literal) about fantasizing “killing off” annoying public figures.
• Emphasis that mistakes and confusion are universal; no one really has it all together.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Burnout & Social Media:
  "It's not worth the money, it's not worth the effort if we're not going to show up in a real way that actually can contribute to something, whether it's knowledge or entertainment or whatever. And I just, I feel like I'm just there." —Kale (08:33)

• On Political Silence:
  "With a platform comes privilege. And I think people should use their privilege to help others." —Alessandra (17:53-17:58)

• On Online Hate:
  "You get death threats on the Internet. You get told that you're like a horrible person or that you're stupid or you're wrong and it takes a toll on a person." —Alessandra (06:54)

• On the Internet’s Hostility:
  "People are not. In today's, like, culture. I would say people are offended if you have a differing opinion. They're not even willing to hear you out. Like, they do not want to hear it." —Kale (13:25)

• On Parenting Wisdom:
  "By child five, you just know. But then in some ways, I'm like…some things you just know, some things you're like, wait, I've never heard of that." —Kale (39:24)

• On Friendship Dynamics:
  "You attract so many people that are opinionated and that want to lead and are naturally maternal like me. Rebecca and Kristen are very different people, but very similar at our core. And then you're like, but I don't want that. But then the people you keep closest around you are like that because you do low-key want it." —Alessandra (50:41)

• Confessions Segment:
  "I've envisioned killing a lot of people this year. Yeah, a lot." —Alessandra (53:02)
  "This podcast is my confession." —Kale (54:11)

• On Survival:
  "We're all just out here doing our best. If you ask Lincoln, I'm just here floating around the earth." —Kale (52:13)

• Final Takeaways:
  "Be nice to us. Be a lesbian. Speak up for important topics... and don't judge people for doing so. Be open minded to having conversations. Be respectful when trying to say your opinion. And not everything is offensive. Right. Like, stop being so easily offended." —Alessandra & Kale (59:23–59:41)

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Important Timestamps

• 05:20 – Alessandra shares the heaviness of 2025 and recovery from depression
• 08:06–08:33 – Burnout, the struggle to create meaningful content
• 13:25–14:23 – On intolerance to differing opinions and the declining belief in people's goodness
• 17:53–18:44 – The risks and responsibility of having a platform
• 21:32 – Kail on toxic online culture
• 24:24–25:17 – Discussion about U.S. political moves affecting education and professional women
• 27:21–28:03 – Escaping stress through books instead of social media
• 30:52–32:02 – Passionate advocacy for women’s sports visibility
• 39:24 – Parenting experience: “by child five, you just know”
• 52:28–54:11 – Confession segment, honest reflection on not having it all together
• 59:23–59:46 – Final life takeaways: kindness, open-mindedness, and resilience

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Conclusion

This episode embodies Barely Famous at its best: unfiltered, honest, and deeply connected. Kail and Alessandra move from the personal to the political with ease, revealing both the hardships and small joys of their lives. They call for greater empathy, less judgement, and a return to real, nuanced conversation—reminding listeners that it’s okay to not have everything figured out, and that simply “surviving and thawing and bopping” through life is more universal than anyone admits.

Transcript

[Alessandra]

Guys, thanks for helping me carry my Christmas tree.

[Justin Sylvester]

Zoe, this thing weighs a ton.

[Alessandra]

Drew Ski, lift with your legs, man.

[Kale]

Santa. Santa, did you get my letter?

[Justin Sylvester]

He's talking to you britches.

[Alessandra]

I'm not. Of course he did. Right, Santa, you know my elf, Drew Ski here. He handles the nice list.

[Justin Sylvester]

And elf, I'm six' three. What everyone wants is iPhone 17 and at T Mobile, you can get it on them. That center stage front camera is amazing for group selfies, right, Mrs. Claus?

[Alessandra]

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[Justin Sylvester]

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[Alessandra]

And now T Mobile is available in.

[Justin Sylvester]

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[Alessandra]

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[Kale]

And $35 device connection charge credits and imbalance due if you pay off earlier accounts. Financing agreement, 256 gigs, $830 eligible board in a new line, $100 plus a month plan without our PayPal taxes and fees required. Check out 15 minutes or less per line. Visit t mobile.com. welcome to the show. Things are going to get weird. It's your fave villain, Kale, and you're listening to Barely Famous.

[Alessandra]

Girl. When are we gonna get on the though? Because you're mine, period. Girl, I'm a 90s baby.

[Kale]

Could you imagine? I just start recording and submit it to record labels and they're like, kale, this is not good.

[Alessandra]

Well, remember in 2021 when you wanted to make a rap album and I said no?

[Kale]

Well, I just think it like, if we just. If I just sang one time for one song and then put it on itunes and it went viral for either how bad it was or how shockingly good it was, we could get rich in just one song.

[Alessandra]

So singing is different than rapping.

[Kale]

I was never gonna be a rapper. You know what I mean?

[Alessandra]

Welcome to Barry Famous AI.

[Kale]

Oh, yeah. Yeah, for sure. Welcome to Barely Famous. I'm sitting with your favorite girl, Alessandra.

[Alessandra]

Favorite girl.

[Kale]

So there is someone in my life that I have be just shoved feminism down their throat and I'm like, you didn't know and I'm informing you.

[Alessandra]

And it's not their fault. No, it's his fault that they don't know.

[Kale]

Yeah.

[Alessandra]

Okay.

[Kale]

It's like, you knew better. You should have done the research.

[Alessandra]

I was trying to, you know, give them a.

[Kale]

Throw a bone.

[Alessandra]

I. I mean, in this day and age, in the lord's year of 2025. Damn near 2026, and you're walking around with computers in your little pockets. It's hard for me. Right. But I also understand that people live in a vacuum.

[Kale]

I think I live in a vacuum sometimes. But people don't know that women only have one good week.

[Alessandra]

Ovulation.

[Kale]

Is that the good week?

[Alessandra]

Is that good? Because that's when we're most attracted to men.

[Kale]

And that's the most disturbing.

[Alessandra]

Exactly.

[Kale]

Is like, we can't go without them during those couple days. I don't know. I don't know that that's a good week. You're right.

[Alessandra]

Yeah.

[Kale]

So we have no good weeks, but.

[Alessandra]

Ovulation is when supposedly we have, like, the most energy. We're feeling the most confident in our bodies.

[Kale]

Is that right? Yeah. Okay, so I should be tracking ovulation for those purposes alone.

[Alessandra]

Do you use anything?

[Kale]

No.

[Alessandra]

Any apps?

[Kale]

No.

[Alessandra]

For my pcos, it's really helpful to know.

[Kale]

What. What app do you use? Flow. Flow, Okay. I used to use that one. And then when I decided I was done having children. Yeah. You were like. I was like, what the do I need this for? But also, my period is never on time anymore, which it always used to be, so I definitely need to get back into it. But we'll see. Flow P. Tracker. Okay.

[Alessandra]

It's good to know. I, like, track my period, and then I track when I have sex.

[Kale]

Oh.

[Alessandra]

So that I can know, you know, like, if that's what it up or whatever.

[Kale]

Oh, I should do that for sure. I'm like, you track when you have sex too?

[Alessandra]

Because I'm not on birth control of any kind, like, at all. It's pulling prey all day. And even then it's like, whatever.

[Kale]

And pray.

[Alessandra]

I'm, like, damn near 35. Do you know what I mean? And, like, a long, committed relationship. So like, even then it's like. Because I know when I'm ovulating.

[Kale]

Yeah, same.

[Alessandra]

And there's only, like, you said, one week out of the month that you can actually get pregnant, so. But most people don't understand that, like, it can live in your body. Sperm can live in your body for 72 hours.

[Kale]

Yeah.

[Alessandra]

So, like, if you don't start ovulating for, like, two days and you had sex three days before, you could technically get pregnant.

[Kale]

That is true. That is very true. Although Lincoln is somewhat of a medical mystery. I was not ovulating that week.

[Alessandra]

Really?

[Kale]

No.

[Alessandra]

Maybe you were.

[Kale]

I was and I didn't. But I was tracking it because at that time I was trying to get pregnant. And my ovulation, even with the tracking at that time, it was off and I ended up getting pregnant. It was so weird.

[Alessandra]

Maybe it was just that window, like in between those two days.

[Kale]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, no doubt. So how have you been? Catch everybody up?

[Alessandra]

Yeah, I've been good, I guess. It's a weird feeling because, like, this time last year, I had just gone out of, like, a really big depression. Like 2023 was, like, rough for me, and then I went on antidepressants. 2,024 was good then. I think it was. It's just the state of the world, honestly, for this year, like, life has been, I think, just really heavy. We collectively have had a really hard 2025.

[Kale]

I. Do you want to get into it at all?

[Alessandra]

Well, our work is personal. Like, your work is your personal life. And I work so intimately with you that your personal life becomes mine in a way. But it a hundred percent is my work life.

[Kale]

Yeah.

[Alessandra]

So that affects me too, on top of everything else. It's not just that by any means. It's just the beginning of the year. I mean, shocked all of us. I think that threw us off all of our axises and we worked out.

[Kale]

Q1 was going really well. Yeah. Until we just hit Q2 and then all of a sudden hit the fan for everybody in all ways.

[Alessandra]

Yeah.

[Kale]

Like, it wasn't just.

[Alessandra]

It wasn't just like one specific catalyst, but I think it just. Well. Well, it's hard. We had just gone into a flow, like a rhythm.

[Kale]

Right.

[Alessandra]

Like, we had had like a few months solid of, like, our recordings, and we were like, in a rhythm. We were getting ahead. We weren't like, doing quick turnarounds. We weren't like on other week.

[Kale]

We weren't going to New York every week.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, we were. We were getting a rhythm. And then suddenly you get thrown off your access and, you know, it kind of affects you. And then for me, the majority of my. I think, like, loss of creativity really does come from the state of the world. And I feel like I'm in a unique position with my platform in certain ways that I. It's connected to other people. So I have feel a responsibility not to drag you guys into what could be negative. Right. So, like, if I have an opinion, and I'm very opinionated and very. I know that I don't know if anybody else knows that I think they know.

[Kale]

And I.

[Alessandra]

Even when I try to be subtle, it's. There's nothing subtle, subtle about me or my opinions. And I. So I try. So for a long time, it. I was able to balance that. And then the state of the world became what it was, and I felt like I had to be quiet. I didn't know how to engage with what's going on and how I was feeling productively and also in a way that wouldn't affect the other people we're connected to. Because I feel like if I just started, like, openly talking about how I feel really deeply, like politically, societally, all these things. I mean, they're strong opinions and people have opinions about those opinions, and it's really hard to swallow that and absorb it a lot. I mean, I. And it's not just because of your stuff. I think it's like overall reaching. But like, you get death threats on the Internet. You get told that you're like a horrible person or that you're stupid or you're wrong and it takes a toll on a person. And then, you know, I had a friendship breakup. My whole, like, business shifted, dynamic shifted. And I think I just got into a rut where I couldn't show up anymore for other people, you know, like on a platform.

[Kale]

But that's like up to be in that place. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, but it's not fair to you.

[Alessandra]

But I'm not the only one.

[Kale]

No, you're not the only one. You know, and I texted you guys, Kristen's here in the room too. Like, I was sort of texting the group about. That's sort of where I'm at. Like just the, the burnout, the state of the world. Like, I, I'm don't. I can't show up on socials the same way I used to. At least not in the beginning of the year. At the beginning of the year, I felt like I was putting out quality content and I was actually, like, contributing to something, and now I just don't have that. And like, I want to contribute something. I don't want to be on the Internet, just to be on the Internet.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, exactly.

[Kale]

Worth anyone's time. It's not worth the money, it's not worth the effort if we're not going to show up in a real way that actually can contribute to something, whether it's knowledge or entertainment or whatever. And I just, I feel like I'm just there.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, that's how I was starting to Feel like my intention behind why I wanted to start a podcast or even like be on social media.

[Kale]

It was really far away from the.

[Alessandra]

Goal post where I was at. Like, I drifted far away with whatever my intention was. And that was. It's hard because I don't really even know how to put it into words. People are like, you're not directly threatened by what's going on, but to look to constantly, every single day, be bombarded with news, information of families that look like me, sound like me, have the same last name as me, be ripped apart and just like, just disgusting, violent rhetoric. I mean, I really don't want to cry because my makeup. We have to go later today, but I. I mean, Alligator Alcatraz was really, really hard for me. That moment in time, watching people take pictures and have merch and stand outside what I would call a modern day concentration, celebrate that that is happening. It's really hard for me. And to be quite frank, I was really angry for like four or five months of the year. I literally have chills and I don't know where to place that, because I do. Like we were saying in the beginning of the conversation, I understand that people come from spaces where they're not educated or they don't have the access to information, or they live in a vacuum and they're ultimately, I don't want to say brainwashed, but it's all a power play. No matter what side you're on, the information is given to you for a reason. To keep you uneducated, sick, have no money, no power, no vote. Like, say. And so the anger, I didn't know where to place it. Like, I really didn't want to place it on people, but it was really, really hard for me. Like, it was hard for me to have conversations with people. Like, I didn't go to holidays last year because I was so distraught and I didn't want to engage in these conversations. I want them to be productive. And I didn't know where to place that anger, truly. And I'm still having problems, like struggles with it.

[Kale]

It's so interesting because I, I learned so much from you. Like, when we talk about heavy topics like, like this and the state of the economy and just, I mean, just the political climate, the world just in general. And I learned so much from you. And I think that you could bring a lot of knowledge and information to people about all of this, but the people that you're speaking to have to be receptive to it. And a lot of the time, I know that you said that you don't want to call it brainwashing. And I think it's like, implicit.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, it's 100.

[Kale]

They don't realize how, like, people in general don't realize, like, the. I don't even know if I would call it, like, microaggressions. Like, I don't even know. But they have to be receptive, and they're not. And they don't understand, like, your position because they're so closed out to learning anything new. I got my first Merit Beauty products in the mail about a month ago, and I've been obsessed ever since. Black Friday Cyber Monday. Sales were just around the corner and so I had to order. And now is the season for gift giving. But that doesn't mean you should forget about yourself. So make a list for everyone else and for yourself. With Merit's annual sale coming soon, Merit is a minimalist beauty brand that makes elevated makeup and skin care designed to help you look put together in minutes. Merit's best sellers are proof that less is really more. The flesh bomb gives you the natural, healthy glow without overdoing it. One was sold every 30 seconds in 2024. That's how good it is. But if you have a no makeup day, that's not a problem. Merits great skin serum. All you need. It instantly hydrates and plumps for a fresh, dewy look, which I love. And Mayor's annual sale is about getting those products you'll actually reach for every day and you'll use down to the last drop. I don't know if anyone's heard of the pan challenge, but definitely consider doing that. And start with Merit Beauty. Right now you can get early access to Merit's only sale of the year when you go merit beauty.com and use code EA famous from November 21st through the 23rd. And you'll get 20% off site wide plus a gift with purchase while supplies last. That's me. R I t beauty.com promo code EA famous merit beauty.com promo code EA famous.

[Alessandra]

When I speak, I mean, like, I want whatever I want for everybody, which is really just like kids not to go hungry people to get like, healthcare and just like really easy things. I want it for everybody.

[Kale]

Yeah.

[Alessandra]

Even if you don't look like me, even if you don't sound like, even if you don't, like, believe what I believe in. And that's. That's what I. That's where I feel the difference is. And that's why I get so confused. I do understand that I have strong opinions, but I try, especially as I get older, to convey those opinions in a way that can be as respectful as possible. And I don't feel like that's always the case for people who have differing opinions than I do.

[Kale]

I think that goes across the board, though. Like, people are not. In today's, like, culture. I would say people are offended if you have a differing opinion. They're not even willing to hear you out. Like, they do not want to hear it. And it's. They're. Everybody's offended by everything.

[Alessandra]

Yeah. And there's. For me, there's a difference between, like, what is an opinion and what isn't an opinion. Like, there are things that I. There's full ground. Stop. Morality. Things. I don't like pepperoni on my pizza. That's an opinion. Do you know what I mean? And when your opinions or the way that your ideologies and the things that you say, if they are threatening the very existence of me or the people that I love, how can I sit with that? And how do I, like, rationalize that in my head? Because for a really long time, I genuinely believed that, like, the majority of people were good. And I have to say, this year has really, really challenge that belief for me.

[Kale]

I would agree with you very much. More and more you meet other people in general, like, we're looking at more. So how. I don't want to say evil. I feel like that's, like, really extreme. But it feels. Not everybody. Not everybody is good. Not. And I think for so long, we have always wanted to see the good in everybody. But I think to your point, like, that's. That's an opinion versus what isn't an opinion. People will really say, oh, this is just my opinion. No, that's not an opinion that is based off of systemic racism. Systemic. I can't even begin to think about, like, where people think that they're. That is an opinion that they don't think that people should eat or they don't like. I know which. Ms. Rachel, I. I talked about it on one of the podcasts, but Ms. Rachel, there was, like, a controversy because she said everybody should be able to eat.

[Alessandra]

How is that controversial?

[Kale]

That shouldn't be controversial. Like, what's controversial is that you guys are looking at anybody that is not bor. In America as less than. Like, that's what's controversial. Is that your thought process right there is, like, inhumane.

[Alessandra]

And, like, it would. For me, it's difficult because this rhetoric has caused, like, changes in our country and our laws and in the way that our society is going to run for a really long time. It's not just like in this moment, it's going to have impact for generations to come. And that's really hard for me to swallow. I mean, this. The Supreme Court literally ruled that you can. ICE can take somebody just off the streets for just speaking Spanish or looking like they could speak Spanish. Like, people think I'm being overdramatic by carrying my passport around. I'm not being over dramatic. I'm just not. It's happening to people. And I think that that's really hard for me too. And I really, instead of fighting because I used to be a keyboard warrior and I used to be yelling all the time, and that's exhausting and draining. And to whom, like you said, they're not willing to listen. So I'm just yelling to an empty void.

[Kale]

As a brown woman, how do you feel about black and brown people with platforms not speaking up about this?

[Alessandra]

It's convoluted because especially if we're talking about black people and black women specifically, like, they need a rest. Like, I don't think it's their job right now to be advocating or educating because they did. And look at what keeps happening. Like, they're the ones who showed up at the polls at like, higher rates and voted in the ways, in my opinion, that would benefit other women, other people, our society in general. And so, like, I think they should take a rest. And also because I just said it's really draining. You get death threats. It can be dangerous, especially if you're a brown person. So I can understand why people wouldn't. But it feels really irresponsible to me. Honestly, it's really hard for me. I grapple with it, but I. I do get why people don't. I do. But I think if you're not in immediate danger or how do you know.

[Kale]

Who'S in immediate danger, though? That's part of the problem is like, if ICE could come and take you from your family literally off the streets, how. How do you decide who's in danger and who's not? Right. I just wonder, like, what that looks like. Because it's like certain people are held to a certain standard and then other, it's like, I mean, I get tagged all the time for why aren't you speaking up? And I have. Do you know what I mean? And I'm. But I'm also, I'm not a black or brown person. So it's hard for me to say, oh, you need to speak up. You need to speak up, you need to speak up. I, I can't expect you to speak up because there is a risk there. But I also think that people, I don't know, like, I don't know what it is.

[Alessandra]

I go back and forth because I do think like with a platform comes privilege. And I think people should use their privilege to help others. Like just in general, like in the, of the world. And then when it comes to white people talking about things that they feel like they shouldn't, actually you guys have more power in that sense because white people are more apt to listen to white people. Do you know what I mean? But I also am a big proponent of not talking about things that you don't know. Like if you, if you feel like talking about something would do more harm than good because you're not educated enough, you don't have enough information to give to people so that they can have an educated opinion, then I really don't think people should talk because that also causes issues with a ton of misinformation that's constantly spread. And that rhetoric can also be dangerous too. So it's complicated. I don't think there is one right answer. But I do feel like if you have a platform, you should. At some, I should know as a person who I am supporting what they believe in. Even if you're not talking about it directly, you don't have to go to protests, you don't have to be screaming about it, you don't have to talk about it constantly. But I should be able to tell from your content or something that you've said that this is a safe space for me and that I am interacting with people online and supporting them and putting money in their pocket that I align with. Like I do believe in that. And people don't talk about it because of money.

[Kale]

And when you say putting money in their pocket, you mean like tick tock.

[Alessandra]

Views or something like that, using their affiliate links. Like if I support somebody on social media, I'm using all of their LTK links, I'm using anything that you put on there. If you've got a sponsorship, I'm going to the link, I'm saving the post, I'm sending it to somebody, I'm interacting. That puts money in people's pockets. If I. If you think that people that look like me should be ripped from their family, if you are racist or homophobic or any of those things, why would I want to support you financially in that way?

[Kale]

But what you're saying is that you should know where they Stand, sort of. Even if they don't. Even if they don't say it, you know, explicitly. Yeah. Okay. So the first person that comes to my mind, she is married to a Hispanic man, has said nothing. You don't know where she stands politically. You don't know where she stands in any way, shape or form. So what does that mean?

[Alessandra]

When I see that? I assume it's that they don't align with me because I think, contrary to popular belief, it is not popular for you to. If you don't have opinions that align with mine, people think that if you speak about them, you're not going to have deals, you're going to lose out on, you know, opportunities. People are gonna have negative things to say about you, which is true on both sides. But I think that you do get a lot of slack for talking about being, let's say, like on the right or more conservative or all those things. And I think people, people don't say it for a reason because they think it's going to affect their bag. And that's hard for me because everybody needs to eat. I understand that. But not all money is good money. I really believe that. And I personally think that money is like an energy. Do you know what I mean? Like, and if it's coming from a bad way or because I'm not talking about something, I don't want it. But that's where it gets complicated with being connected to the other shows and other people in this space. Because if you guys aren't taking the risk.

[Kale]

Risk?

[Alessandra]

Why should I put you guys at risk for potentially losing sponsors or things like that? Because, like, for example, in the podcast, we're all a circle. My show's super small. It's all the way at the bottom. But there could be a trickle down effect where if I lose a sponsorship on my show, you guys could lose it because they sell us as a package sometimes. Do you know what I mean? And I don't want to. That's not fair. I don't want to risk that. So it, There are, there's so many reasons. And I really like the older I get. It's really hard for me. But not everything is black.

[Kale]

I'm like, sneeze, you're fine. That was, that was this. I didn't fart. That was the couch. Like it. But people will say I farted in the closet.

[Alessandra]

I didn't even hear it.

[Kale]

It was the couch or something. It wasn't. I swear to God. No, I, I agree with what you're saying. It is hard I definitely am trying my best just to stay off social media in general as far as consuming content, because it's just not a super friendly, fun place anymore. It's a very, it's very heavy. And I, I try not to even go on social media, but there are some times where I get tagged in certain things where it's like, kale, why aren't you speaking up? And it's like, certain topics specifically I shouldn't be speaking on regardless, because I don't. I'm not. Even if I think I'm knowledgeable, I'm not knowledgeable enough. And you're. You should be looking over there at that person because we, we sort of know where they stand and they're not speaking up on a specific topic. So it gets a little frustrating. But, I mean, I'm. I'll talk about what I know. It's just a tricky.

[Alessandra]

There's so many different ways to do it, though, because you platform people that talk about things like, you might not want to talk about it, but like, we had Kathleen Martinez on, so do you know what I mean?

[Kale]

But I have talked about ICE and.

[Alessandra]

Immigration, of course, but like, but there's different ways to ask.

[Kale]

Yeah, because it's like, okay, that's what I align with, but I don't know enough to talk about it. So I align with it. Let me, let me align myself with someone who knows how, how to word it, because I'm not super great. I live under a rock. A lot of times I have no idea what's going on. When it comes to holiday gifting, I want to give things to people that they'll really love. Timeless pieces you'll wear for years. And that's why I go with quince. From Mongolian cashmere sweaters to Italian wool coats, everything is premium quality at a price that actually makes sense. Soft Mongolian cashmere sweaters starting at $50 that look and feel like designer pieces. Silk tops and skirts for dressing up. Perfectly cut denim for everyday wear and outerwear that'll actually keep you warm. Their Italian wool coats are standout pieces. Beautifully tailored, soft to the touch, and crafted to last for seasons. Every piece is made with premium materials from ethical, trusted factories and price far below what luxury brands charge. The craftsmanship shows in every detail. The stitching, the fit, the drape. It's elevated, timeless, and made to wear on repeat. You won't regret gifting with quins. Fine gifts so good you'll want to keep them for yourself. With quince. Go to quince.com famous for free shipping on your order. And 365 day returns now available in Canada too. That's. That's Q U I n c e.com famous to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com famous I had a playdate. Lux had a playdate the other day, and two of the teachers were the other moms, and they were talking about how the Trump administration. Correct me when I say this, because I'm gonna it up. Got rid of, defunded the Department of Education. Is that right? Yes, they dismantled the Department of Education and they were talking about it and I said, but what does that actually mean? Like, tell me what that means. And so they explained it to me, but I was just like. Like, I have no business speaking on that. But I definitely don't agree with it.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, and that's what's difficult too, because there's so many, like, intricacies and nuances to that. I don't even know necessarily deeply what that means. But overall, I mean, defunding it's any overreach of what can be taught in schools and things like that is a slippery slope because education and knowledge is power. And so to me, if you want to control a populace, you're going to control their education. And it makes sense that that's what they're going for. I mean, we already have an abysmal education system in America. They also just are trying to make it so that certain titles are no longer considered professional titles. And it's all careers that mostly women are in. Like, I don't know.

[Kale]

Well, it was like all these jobs that would be no longer recognized as professional. And I was like, what the does that even mean? What does it mean that they're no longer considered professional?

[Alessandra]

I think it would be like their titles are stripped from them.

[Kale]

It's like speech pathologists, teachers. And actually in Delaware schools, there are several teachers that are leaving the public school system to go teach in prisons instead because they. There's more money teaching in prisons. Well, because you have to think about it, a lot of the prisons are privately funded. So they're gonna go make more money in the prison system and they're. We already have a teacher shortage. So think. And now this podcast episode is all over the place already. The important things that need to be talked about that are, that are going. I think people don't know about it. They don't know what's going on. And I like, if our school, our public schools are already having a shortage, like, to the point that they've Asked me to sub there. Like, you don't want me teaching your kids? You don't want me teaching your kids. They are leaving, and we're gonna have even bigger shortage because they're gonna get paid more to do pri. Like prisons.

[Alessandra]

And also, I heard that it's like, that kids are just disrespectful that 90 of the time they're just trying to manage the kids versus actually teaching. And I've had, like. Like, kids in my life say that there's so many disruptive kids in their class, they don't even get to sit down and have, like, a lesson 90 of the time. And that's frustrating if you actually are there to learn, you know? And I think that comes out that. I mean, that does come down to parenting. And I stopped teaching preschool because of the parents. It wasn't the kids. I love kids.

[Kale]

I just don't know what all of this. We started this episode catching up with you and how you are and how things are heavy, and there's just a lot going on. And I just. I don't. To your point, I don't see it getting better anytime soon. And that's the scary part is, like, where do we go from here?

[Alessandra]

And that's where. Also, like, as an individual, I'm trying to manage that too, for myself. Because, like, I think that we all have to stay informed and educated, but not to, like, our detriment. But I also think it's really hard right now to have a balance because it just feels like everything that's coming out is negative. Like, even if I'm trying to limit the amount that I'm taking in, whatever I'm taking in is negative. I mean, that's gen. That's why I'm reading 10 to 12 books a month.

[Kale]

I saw that. I saw your Goodreads. The other. Not your Goodreads. You posted something and I counted on the screen. I was like, I had to do a double take. And I counted. I think it was like, 11 or 12 books. And I was like, holy.

[Alessandra]

And it's because I'm literally not. When I have any downtime, I'm not doing anything else. The last show I watched was Hunting Wives. Like, I don't watch tv. I'm trying not to scroll. Yeah, I'm trying not to scroll. So bad. Because it's bad for me.

[Kale]

Are you saving money also while you're doing that? Because if you're not scrolling, you're not seeing the things that you want.

[Alessandra]

Yes and no. There's like, I'm buying books constantly. Yeah.

[Kale]

But I feel like books could be.

[Alessandra]

A write off if I start posting again.

[Kale]

If you come on book club, they could. Technically. I know.

[Alessandra]

And like, my thing is, like, it could be drugs. I mean, it is, but I'm also buying weed every week, too. So it's both. And the thing is, and then I'm like, I'm doing these hauls. I'm like, going to the bookstore and getting 12 books. And then I'm thinking to myself, will you read three to four a week? Like, it's not like I was keeping them. And I'm like, not re. I mean, I do have a whole half of my shelf is not books that I've read, but you know what I mean, I'm trying.

[Kale]

Are you a mood reader? Oh, yeah. Oh, same. Oh, yeah.

[Alessandra]

Like, remember we tried to read Yellowface last year? I'm reading it now because I couldn't get it.

[Kale]

I read it when we said we were going to read it. And then Kristen asked me to read a book with her, and she kept asking and asking. I never got to it. Now I'm reading it and she's not.

[Alessandra]

And that was last year, right?

[Kale]

Yeah. Kristen's off screen saying, yes, Kristen is on. She took over Alessandra's job. Yeah. Imagine we just like from the killer network and killer sports. We all trade jobs for a day. Kristen said, no.

[Alessandra]

I wouldn't even know where to begin, honestly.

[Kale]

Well, we could. We could put you two in killer sports. We'll have True. But, like, running it though this.

[Alessandra]

They're not gonna want me there.

[Kale]

They're not gonna want me there.

[Alessandra]

I don't know anything about the sports. I had to ask Billy what sports season we're in right now. It's football. But what's in January?

[Kale]

January is ending winter sports and nothing. Usually it's like winter. Like basketball starts. Yeah. I mean, it depends because college and NBA are a little bit different, but. Yeah. No, it's definitely like basketball season and football season overlap because basketball season right now, too. Oh.

[Alessandra]

Hockey is the longest season, I think, other than baseball, because baseball's long as hell.

[Kale]

I would love for my kids to play baseball, but I like mlb. I don't like it right now because they let every kid bat. And it's just I don't have time to sit here for three hours while every kid gets four or five bats. I'm not. I'm not here for it. So when Lux told me, mom, I really want to go back to baseball, I'm like, okay, you're like, please, no. And they have, like, games, like, three.

[Alessandra]

Days, but even his age, they're doing that.

[Kale]

And I'm like, please, for the love of God. Like, I just. I can't do it. So, like, let's. That's. I'm gonna do it. But, like, let's maybe hold off until middle school when it's like, you get three strikes and you're out, but, you know, it's neither here nor there.

[Alessandra]

I grew up in a sports family. Like, my brother did baseball. So I was, like, always, you know, around with him and on the field and stuff like that for him, but not me. I did softball. Softball for a little bit.

[Kale]

Hated it.

[Alessandra]

Did not want to be doing that.

[Kale]

I never got into softball.

[Alessandra]

I was made to do it. I didn't want to.

[Kale]

I. You know, from the karma and chaos episode. Like, I wanted to play basketball so bad. I went to this Hoop Dreams. Hoop Dream sleepover in fourth grade, where it was, like, at the school, in the gym. My mom picked me up, like, completely sloshed the next morning, and I was just like, this is. It was literally called Hoop Dreams, and I was literally just, like, dreaming about basketball. Like, I was gonna play basketball.

[Alessandra]

Just because you were tall?

[Kale]

No, I. Yes. But I also, like, was, like, the same way. I thought I was a horse whisperer. Like, I was just drawn to it. I wanted to play. If I would have played, I think I could have been decent. Maybe not the best, but I would have been okay. I did have a small, small, like, I want to play soccer streak, but then that also failed, and I didn't get to play. I played for the YMCA one year.

[Alessandra]

But is if anybody listening or, you know, anybody and you're listening, that works for, like, the WNBA or something? Like, please hit us up, because I want Kale to go train with those ladies.

[Kale]

Let me warm up.

[Alessandra]

Like, wouldn't that be such a good video if we just had her in there training with them? I need it.

[Kale]

The Aces, the Monarchs. Any. Like, literally everyone watches women's sports, okay? We. I want to advocate so hard in 2026 for women's sports to be, like, more televised. And I'm so sick of the rhetoric that is like, well, nobody watches it. Nobody's excited about it. Yeah, because y' all don't put it anywhere. You don't put it. Because, no, advertisers are not paying for women's sports on tv because nobody's watching them. Because no. Like, it's like, a cycle, right? Like, it's like, no one's gonna pay because no one's watching. Well, if you put it on tv, people will have to pay. Hello.

[Alessandra]

My niece's generation is watching it, though, because of Paige Becker's.

[Kale]

Yes.

[Alessandra]

They're obsessed with her.

[Kale]

It's definitely up and coming. And I read something about a women's baseball team. Oh. So I think New York already formed their team or they're, like, thinking about it. Listen, I will be there. I'll the same way. Unwell sponsored something Killer network will sponsor women's sports. Yeah. I don't have much to give, but I'll put my heart and soul into it.

[Alessandra]

I'll show up.

[Kale]

I'll be an honorary member. Literally put me in a mascot suit. So, yeah.

[Alessandra]

What would be the killer mascot?

[Kale]

That's a great question. I am feeling a bird.

[Alessandra]

It's gross. It's bird.

[Kale]

I'm feeling. Well, so I. We were driving. I know. I said I was never gonna get another dog.

[Alessandra]

Yeah.

[Kale]

And Kristen said that she might get me a bird. So I was like, Kristen?

[Alessandra]

We said no. They have some for adoption. I need homes.

[Kale]

PETA. Peter wrote an email to me. Yeah.

[Alessandra]

And they're gonna say, no birds.

[Kale]

No. Because I said that I would keep them out of the cage.

[Alessandra]

You have seven kids. 37 million chickens. Five. Like pigs. Like, no. Serea told us they're real. They're a lot of work.

[Kale]

But I want it out of the cage all day long.

[Alessandra]

It's gonna on you.

[Kale]

Well, the other option was I really wanted a great Dane.

[Alessandra]

Why does it have to be either or? Since I've got the tubes out and can't have any more kids. Get the animals.

[Kale]

Get the animals. Or I had another business idea.

[Alessandra]

Okay.

[Kale]

I think you'll like this one, though.

[Alessandra]

Who do I sue for emotional distress for this one.

[Kale]

Kelsey.

[Alessandra]

Okay.

[Kale]

She'll be there tonight.

[Alessandra]

All right.

[Kale]

Her mom has been buying tickets, like, buying cuddle sessions with highland cows like it's an actual business.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, well, I just wanted the highland cow, remember?

[Kale]

I want. So do you support?

[Alessandra]

Not right now.

[Kale]

Oh. What if it was gifted to me? Gifted meaning $0 go into it and no, I have to feed it. So it would have to be like a couple hundred to feed it.

[Alessandra]

But, like, we should do a petting zoo. Not at her house. Because on this people on the 20 acres. Yeah. Or goat yoga.

[Kale]

Not my goats.

[Alessandra]

Have you done that?

[Kale]

No, I haven't. Matt told me about goat yoga. I don't know anything.

[Alessandra]

It'll jump all over you.

[Kale]

Will it feel like a back massage? Because I want That I don't know about that how many massages in one week is like toxic?

[Alessandra]

Well, I think you have to give your body like a moment, your muscles to rest.

[Kale]

When life gets busy, meal prep usually falls off the list. And even when we do it, it's the same boring chicken and rice on repeat. And I can attest to that. That's why I reached for temp balanced fresh meals that are equally good for you, taste great and are ready in minutes. It makes more sense. No skipping meals, no sad takeout and no endless prep. And the kids are back in school, especially around the holidays and the day is getting way more busy. The routines can get thrown off with parties, feasts, endless to dos, lots of events at school. It's just way easier to use Tempo Meals. And they're real. They're already cooked, they're ready in minutes, they're good for you. And they help me stay balanced while enjoying the celebrations. Tempo delivers fresh chef crafted meals. They're dietitian approved right to your door. And each meal is perfectly portioned for lunch or dinner and ready in just two minutes. So that means real food real fast, without the sad desk lunch or drive thru regret. And they have 20 new recipes every single week made from nutrient rich ingredients. And Tempo keeps things exciting and helps you stay consistent with healthy habits. So if you're going into the new year and you want to eat better, definitely check out Tempo. There's a Tempo meal for you. Whether it's protein packed with up to 30 grams of protein, calorie conscious, carb conscious or even fiber rich, it's super convenient and also flexible. Tempo is the official partner for 2025 CrossFit Games, which is amazing, proving their meals are built to support optimal nutrition and performance. And for a limited time, Tempo is offering my listeners 60% off your first box. Go to Tempo Meals.com famous that's Tempo Meals.com famous for 60% off your first box. Tempo Meals.com famous rules and restrictions may apply. Kristen and I are also taking Alessandra to her first ice hockey game tonight.

[Alessandra]

Professional ice.

[Kale]

Professional ice hockey. My sister is also coming to the boy aquarium with us and my niece. I'm really excited when people don't know what the boy aquarium is. I don't know how they don't know. Like, they're literally humping the ice and I don't know why. Nobody wants parts of this. Like, I don't care if you're not a hockey fan, you will be once you get there.

[Alessandra]

Oh yeah. And like, I love when the men fight. But in like a. I love it too. In like a. What's it called? Controlled environment. Because, like, street fights really freaked me out. But, like, you know, in the rink, hot. Like, let men be men.

[Kale]

Somebody lost their tooth the one day we went to a game.

[Alessandra]

None of them have teeth.

[Kale]

That's okay.

[Alessandra]

I went to school, New England. So hockey was, like, really big. So I was always going to the hockey games because my roommate was dating someone on the hockey team. The hockey team. Dame near lived in my apartment.

[Kale]

Oh, that's kind of cool.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, it was fun. But they stink.

[Kale]

I would imagine. But men stink in general.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, but they'd come, like, after practice and, like, just chill on my couch. Stink. Stink. Hockey stink is bad. Yeah, because they're wearing that gear under. And so it smells like a jock strap. Like, but it's your whole body.

[Kale]

Have you ever heard of jock itch? Yeah, I learned what jockish itch is this year. I didn't have it, obviously, but I. That.

[Alessandra]

We definitely needed that to be clarified, though.

[Kale]

It wasn't me that had it. And they said it burned.

[Alessandra]

Oh, I'm sure. What is like a yeast infection, Basically, the gooch.

[Kale]

It was actually informative for me because I have six boys, but I, I. Oh, yeah. What do you. Do you get on antibiotics or. Like, how does that cream, I think.

[Alessandra]

And powders. I think it's just keeping moisture out of that area. But I don't know how you do that. That I. Listen, I've said it multiple times. I probably will only have one kid at this point. I'm gonna be 35 in April, so we'll see if it even happens at all. But one kid. And I really hope it's a girl. What am I gonna do with a boy?

[Kale]

No, but here's the. Like, it's so weird because now that I have a girl, it is so weird.

[Alessandra]

Like.

[Kale]

Health wise, like, body wise. Not like, I'm not talking about, like, if there's health problems, but, like, I feel like in some ways boys are easier, but in other ways, girls are easier. It's really hard to say. Like, I just be. It doesn't matter.

[Alessandra]

Yeah. No. I love a little boy. They're so sweet.

[Kale]

My kids have never had jock itch. So when I learned about jock itch this year, I didn't know that was a thing. Like, I had never.

[Alessandra]

That's. Like, when we did tell Becky about the neck cheese about the babies, and.

[Kale]

She was like, wait, what?

[Alessandra]

Like, there's just so many things you don't know, like, I'm like. I'm like, up until three, I'm good, super knowledgeable. I know what I'm doing. I've, like, been around hundreds of babies at this point. After three, who the hell knows?

[Kale]

I told. So Rio had a fever the other day, and I had. And Elijah texted me, was like, I'm gonna take Rio to the doctor. And I was like, no. Like, it's a fever. Just wait it out for two days. If he already has an appointment on Monday, this was on a Thursday. I said, he has an appointment on Monday already. If you just rotate, like, Tylenol and Motrin, he should be good. That's all they're going to tell you to do anyway. And it's like, by child five, you're. You're. You just know. But then in some ways, I'm like. Like, if he would have told me that, like, there was jock itch, I would have been like, what the is that? And it's like, he's my fifth boy. You know what I mean? So it's like, some things you just know, and then some things you're like, wait, I've never heard of that.

[Alessandra]

I. I bet you if we called my mom and asked her, she's probably still learning about how to raise me. And I'm 34, so.

[Kale]

Asked me yesterday, what if I get soap in my pee hole?

[Alessandra]

I mean, what do.

[Kale]

What do I do? So I asked Lux, but kids have.

[Alessandra]

Just, like, go up there. Like, doesn't have to be, like, forced up there. It's not like our vagina, like, it just six when they.

[Kale]

Yeah.

[Alessandra]

Burns really bad.

[Kale]

Well, Lux told me that he washed it, and it's just like, if the skin opens a little bit and it just slides in. And I was like, oh. So Creed asked me that, and I was like, I don't know. So I asked Lux, I said, lux, what do you do? And he's like, I don't know. You just pour water on it and hope for the best.

[Alessandra]

Try to pee it out. But could you even pee? That probably hurts like hell.

[Kale]

Couldn't imagine.

[Alessandra]

No. I couldn't imagine having a day. Like, it's just hanging there on your body.

[Kale]

And, like, what if it, like, gets in the way?

[Alessandra]

It does.

[Kale]

Well, if it's big enough, it.

[Alessandra]

Apparently it does. And their bowls get in the way, and they have to, like, move it and adjust it when they're, like, sitting. And as they get older, it stretch. Oh, my God, I'm gonna throw up. They're so gross.

[Kale]

I mean, at some point we should just castrate them all.

[Alessandra]

I really like, balls are just not it for me.

[Kale]

You know how, like, women go through menopause. Like, we should just literally chemically castrate them.

[Alessandra]

It's castration. Full gone.

[Kale]

There's chemical and then castration.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, but when you castrate, is it like the shaft and the balls or.

[Kale]

It'S just the balls?

[Alessandra]

Just the balls.

[Kale]

Good.

[Alessandra]

I don't like them.

[Kale]

I like them when they slap against balls, but I don't like them in general.

[Alessandra]

Do you like when they slap again?

[Kale]

Like if I'm having sex in missionary or something, or even like, probably doggy, like, the extra sensation of balls slapping against me is everything well in my brain.

[Alessandra]

I'm like, was that my thighs or was that your balls? And then I'm immediately out of the moment, like, please let that be your balls.

[Kale]

My thighs helps my thighs.

[Alessandra]

Listen, they're hanging lately too, like, Jesus Christ. The older you get, dude. And I love being in my 30s, but there's so many things about my body that I just like. I've never been this aware of my body back.

[Kale]

Do you feel like you're in an adult body, though?

[Alessandra]

Yeah, I really do. Cuz my back hurts all day, every day. Like permanently these days.

[Kale]

I don't know. I was getting a massage yesterday, I needed one so bad and I was like, my lower back is in pain, but it's not the muscles. I was telling the massage therapist this and she's like, yeah, but it might not have to do with your muscles, but like, you need to strengthen your core. And I'm like, well, when I don't.

[Alessandra]

Have time, like rude, like, I come here for this.

[Kale]

I have 100 kids, ma'. Am.

[Alessandra]

Tell me I need to strengthen my.

[Kale]

I'm gonna strengthen my core.

[Alessandra]

Wait, okay, so we, Billy and I go to this one masseuse place and I. Oh, they automatically know. They see me and they're like, the man. There's only one man that works there.

[Kale]

They're like, they.

[Alessandra]

She needs the man's hands, like strong on her body because otherwise the women are like on the table, like on top, getting it out. But my mass. My massage place is like an Asian massage parlor. And they will get in your cheeks.

[Kale]

Oh yeah, that is awkward. But I'll do it.

[Alessandra]

But, oh yeah, I'll do it all day.

[Kale]

I mean, I want you to dig your elbow in my cheeks. Everything, just everything we need to feel.

[Alessandra]

Oh, I want to walk out of there sore because then the next day you feel so good.

[Kale]

So Good. I will say I said deep pressure. I need even deeper.

[Alessandra]

Really?

[Kale]

Yeah.

[Alessandra]

You. Did you get a massage when you were in Thailand?

[Kale]

I don't remember. I feel, I feel like I did.

[Alessandra]

They're like really famous for their massages. And me and my friends did ours on the beach and they ask you, do you want a Thai massage or do you. What did she say? She said, like an oil massage.

[Kale]

I think I did. I think I did.

[Alessandra]

And I said, oh, an oil massage. That sounds. Sounds nice. I'm the only one who did everybody else at a time massage. I like turn around during my massage at one point and they are my friends up, like pulling them up, like turning them around. Like basically just them up. And I'm just getting this nice massage and I'm like, oh, my God. Like they're. And we're hungover. Like, you know what I mean? I was in my 20s. We're jet lagged and they look up, they're pulling them, like, them up. You might like a Thai massage, though. It wasn't deep, Deep enough for you?

[Kale]

That's what I want.

[Alessandra]

That's what you need me up.

[Kale]

They were going.

[Alessandra]

Women were on there. And I'm like, they are strong, dude. They're doing that all day long.

[Kale]

Oh, Thai women are unmatched.

[Alessandra]

Yeah.

[Kale]

I loved every single Thai person I met in Thailand.

[Alessandra]

I almost didn't come home.

[Kale]

No, I wouldn't have.

[Alessandra]

I was on a boat and this man was like, yeah, you can call your boss and tell them, like, you're gonna stay here with me and be on this snorkeling boat. And I'm like, you're right, I can't do that. My friends are like, you're drunk off Thai whiskey. You can't do that.

[Kale]

No. The only two places I have ever truly felt like that I don't want to come home are Thailand and Hawaii.

[Alessandra]

Oh.

[Kale]

Like where I could live there and work from there and do all of the things. But the only thing that keeps me away from living in Hawaii, aside from the baby daddies, of course, is that they don't want us.

[Alessandra]

Yeah. They don't want us there.

[Kale]

Because I was. I want to respect that. Yeah. And I had. There was once upon a time I had a wild hair. And I called Kristen. I said, I'm getting a house in Hawaii. And then I thought about it and I was like, actually, it's not like I could drive there any time. It's not. It would not be the investment that I thought it would be because I would want to use it for like our family. Yeah. And then I would also want to use it as an Airbnb, but it was not going to be the flex that I wanted it to be.

[Alessandra]

So I was like, so expensive to have property there. And there's like, not a lot of property.

[Kale]

They don't want us there anyway. And I want to respect that. Like, I, I, I can understand and respect and empathize that they want tourist money for, you know, whatever it may be, but you also want to protect that. But Thailand, I feel like they are. Oh yeah, they want people there. And I would, I could totally see myself, like, when I'm old, if I ever get super old beyond 60, I would get a house.

[Alessandra]

You're gonna kill her.

[Kale]

Like, if you guys truly want me to live past 60, I would need a, I need a summer house, a winter house where I leave in the winter. Because my, my great grandma shout out to Helen. I know she's dead now, but she used to went out for the homie Ellen or whatever though Me, Ellen. I also just like hate that name so much. She used to Ellen. Why didn't you, why did her mom name her that?

[Alessandra]

It was the Times.

[Kale]

No, Helen is crazy.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, I don't like it either.

[Kale]

And she was the best. She was a saint. She was the best woman ever. But Helen, she was such a saint on this earth. And she used to go to Florida in the winter times. And if you want me to live for a long time, that's what I would need because I'm not staying here in the cold winters.

[Alessandra]

Roger.

[Kale]

Okay, let's talk about hair for a second. I've noticed a little bit more shedding than usual in the shower when I washed my hair. And neutrophil will prevent that. I'm about to start taking neutrophil again because I did get my hair where I needed it to be. But unfortunately, I need to start back up. Up. Neutrophil is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand trusted by over one and a half million people. See thicker, stronger, faster growing hair with less shedding in just three to six months. And this holiday season, Neutrophil is the perfect gift for anyone on your list. Your mom or your aunt going through menopause, a friend who just had a baby or is experiencing postpartum hair shedding, your husband or father who relies on his baseball hat to cover up yourself, or anyone you know looking to support their overall hair health. And I absolutely love it. My best friend and I started taking this together last I Can't recommend it enough. It's probably not something you've ever thought to give as a gift, but trust me, they will thank you later. And gifting something that someone will actually need instead of a mug or a gift card or a blanket is actually thoughtful and an impactful way to show that you care this holiday season. Give the gift of confidence this holiday season with nutrafol. Whether you're treating yourself or someone on your list visibly healthier, thicker hair is the gift that keeps on giving. Right now, neutrophil is offering our listeners $10 off your first month subscription, plus free shipping. When you go to neutrophil.com and use promo code famous. That's neutrophil.com promo code famous for $10 off.

[Alessandra]

My mom's doing that. We were just talking about that yesterday.

[Kale]

Where are we going? Because I'll go with her.

[Alessandra]

We're gonna do Italy. My mom and I are probably gonna buy like a two family house in Italy.

[Kale]

That makes sense.

[Alessandra]

She'll be because like where my aunt lives is like the beach. It's the south, so it's not. Doesn't get cold.

[Kale]

What about like hate Arizona? An island.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, you could.

[Kale]

Costa Rica even is a country. It's not an island.

[Alessandra]

The virgin islands is a U. S. Territory. So people could come and visit you without a passport.

[Kale]

No, I don't want people to visit me.

[Alessandra]

Same. I don't want anybody.

[Kale]

Kristen has to get a passport because we're going to London in August. So she has to get a passport.

[Alessandra]

Who's going to London in August?

[Kale]

Kristen didn't tell you? You're also going. Great. I decided that. You didn't tell her about Alessandra? No, we're all going to love.

[Alessandra]

I'm down. I have a passport.

[Kale]

You didn't.

[Alessandra]

I told you it's in my purse.

[Kale]

I thought this was established. Like we need to book flights in January.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, but baby, you probably. I know you said something about going to London on karma and chaos. But like, you'll say it one time somewhere and then like, that's it. That's firm. We're going to London. That's the plan. And then there's no plan that we have to tell. And you're like, you didn't tell her. And all it would be would Chris would be like, you're going to London. That's it.

[Kale]

No, she's going to London. She convinced Corey because I convinced her. So we're going to London. It started because Lincoln they that same program that. Yeah. He was playing Soccer with in Spain reached out to me, and I honestly don't care if it's a money grab. So if you guys are gonna all comment in the. That it's a money grab, I don't give a. If Lincoln gets to play soccer in London and he wants to do it, I'm taking him to do it. Like, I don't. It doesn't matter to me if that, that company asked him, because they know we'd pay for it. I literally don't. I don't care.

[Alessandra]

Oh, oh, oh.

[Kale]

That.

[Alessandra]

That's how it's a money grab. I'm like, how?

[Kale]

If it's a money grab for Lincoln to play? And then I was like, okay, well, if Lincoln's gonna play, then obviously Lux has to play, so we have to go to London. And they gave me a list of places. It was like, Germany, London. I want to say Spain maybe.

[Alessandra]

You're like, I'm not going back to Spain.

[Kale]

I'm not going back to Spain. So I was like, let's do London, and we could do a tour date while we're there, love. And Kristen said that Corey wanted to go, so I was like, great, now you have to get your passport. You don't have a choice. Choice. It's like, once you say once you tell people it's happening. Kristen can't say no.

[Alessandra]

Kristen can't say no.

[Kale]

Kristen. She can't. Everyone. Everyone knows. So we're going.

[Alessandra]

My favorite thing is, like, in the comments of stuff, like, we'll say something or you'll say something or Becky with something. And then they'll be like, Kristen's gonna get real pissed at that.

[Kale]

Those are my favorite ones. Because I'm like, yeah, she is. I love stirring the pot.

[Alessandra]

Adult odd over here. We were talking about earlier there. She's like, I don't want to hear it. I don't. I'm doing it.

[Kale]

Yes. I, I had to have a. A conversation about finances with someone for killer sports. And I was like, so this is what I can offer you. I, I, I know that I've mentioned it before, but this is what I can offer you. And he was like, is there any room for, like, negotiation? I said, nope. Kristen said, no.

[Alessandra]

Call Kristen. She said, no.

[Kale]

I said, if you want to negotiate, call Kristen.

[Alessandra]

They're probably like, who the is.

[Kale]

I don't care. Figure it out. Kristen's an honorary member of Kale. It's like, yeah, it's like the extension. What is your one person?

[Alessandra]

Oh, yeah. Before you said, she's like, a local Kristen.

[Kale]

Oh, Kelsey. Because Kelsey gets on to me just as much as Kristen does. And I'm like, can you not? Like, can you not? And I was scared that Kristen wasn't gonna like Kelsey.

[Alessandra]

But you like it. You know what? I was thinking about this the other day. For somebody who does not like to be told what to do because you don't.

[Kale]

And I'm.

[Alessandra]

I'm the.

[Kale]

I do not like to.

[Alessandra]

Don't tell me what to do ever, because I'm get pissed. I'm gonna stop. I have problems with that. But that's why I don't have anybody around me to tell me what to do. You attract so many people that are opinionated and that want to lead and are naturally maternal like me. Rebecca and Kristen are very different people, but very similar in, like, our core of, like, where our opinions are and, like, how we have them. And then you're like. You're like, but I don't want that. But then the people you keep closest around you are like that because you do low key want it.

[Kale]

Because it's like, in some ways, I want the guidance.

[Alessandra]

Yeah. The sound.

[Kale]

But then other times I'm like, I don't want.

[Alessandra]

I don't want to hear the rational thoughts behind the thing that I know that I'm doing isn't rational, but I'm doing it anyway. So please don't take me out of the moment.

[Kale]

Yeah. You know, that's literally me.

[Alessandra]

Yeah.

[Kale]

Because I'd be like, kristen, I'm getting this cow today, and I don't want to hear why. I just have to get the cow. Like, I'll explain later.

[Alessandra]

And in your brain you're like, kristen is gonna say, this is a bad idea to get this count, and it probably is a bad idea to get the cow, but I'm doing it anyway, so I'm not telling nobody.

[Kale]

And then. And then also, hey, can you clean up? Help me clean up this mess.

[Alessandra]

Exactly. Like, I up like, hey, I snuck out in the middle of the night and broke into my own bank account and got a camper.

[Kale]

You.

[Alessandra]

The way you said it, you literally said, and I stole from the bank account in the middle of the night. And I'm thinking myself, that is your bank account. Steal anything. Like the sneak of the night. She's like, I went in the night and I got my money. And I'm like, yeah, you didn't rob anybody. It was your bank account.

[Kale]

Just do my best, you know, like.

[Alessandra]

We'Re all just out here doing our best.

[Kale]

If you ask Lincoln, I'm just here floating around the earth.

[Alessandra]

He's not wrong. We all are. And that is. I think that's such a good way for this. Like, that is a conclusive thing for this episode, because we've been all over the place. None of us know what the we're doing.

[Kale]

We just wing it and hope for the best.

[Alessandra]

Honestly, I'll never forget one time you said, I wouldn't ask. I wouldn't tell Sandra. Like, I wouldn't give her advice because she knows what she's doing. I have no. Have no idea what I'm doing.

[Kale]

I wouldn't give Kristen advice either, because she knows what she's doing.

[Alessandra]

No idea.

[Kale]

Y' all are more adult than me.

[Alessandra]

It's day by day. Yeah, it truly is. Like, I wake up and I'm like, we're tackling this day today, and that's it. Because I have no capacity for anything else. I don't think anybody has it together. And if they tell you, they do their lying.

[Kale]

Alessandra, if you had to go to confession with a Catholic priest right now. Is it with a priest? Yeah. What would you confess? Like, pretend I'm the priest. Imagine.

[Alessandra]

I've envisioned killing a lot of people this year.

[Kale]

Really?

[Alessandra]

Yeah, a lot.

[Kale]

Wait, okay, timeout. Can we talk about this? I have never in my life actually, like, thought about killing anyone, but Kristen does.

[Alessandra]

Yeah.

[Kale]

And, like, it's just so funny to me because, like. Like, when you guys do that, like, are you thinking, like, I hate them so much I want to kill them, or, like, what do you. Like, what is that thought process? Yeah, like, you're killing them or they're just dying.

[Alessandra]

They're just dying most of the time, like, in my brain. I'm not, like, actually doing the act, but they're, like, dying.

[Kale]

You're killing them off.

[Alessandra]

But, like, I'm talking. Like, I'm not talking people in my personal life.

[Kale]

It's like.

[Alessandra]

Do you know what I mean? Like, certain people, like, public.

[Kale]

I was gonna say, leave it in, dude.

[Alessandra]

Billy won't even let me talk when my iPad is on or my Alexa.

[Kale]

Like.

[Alessandra]

Like, he's so scared. I'm like, they would have got. I'm on a list. I'm definitely on a list somewhere. It's fine.

[Kale]

What kind of list? But if you had a. If you. That's what you would confess that you have thought about killing off people? I guess.

[Alessandra]

What else would I confess?

[Kale]

I don't know how.

[Alessandra]

I haven't done anything.

[Kale]

I would.

[Alessandra]

I don't leave my house. All I do Is read.

[Kale]

What would I confess? Because we're really just going off of what Kristen. Kristen's supposed to be at Confessions. This podcast is my confession.

[Alessandra]

Yeah, you don't need to confess. You've done it.

[Kale]

There's just nothing that I like, even, like, thoughts that I have. I don't really have morbid thoughts in any way. Like, I don't.

[Alessandra]

No, because you. Every time you think it, you tell Kristen.

[Kale]

Yeah, no doubt. So, like, secret keeper, like, I would say that I would confess that I said out loud that I hated one of my kids. Dads.

[Alessandra]

I say I hate your kids. I'm not confessing that.

[Kale]

Like, I don't. Outside of.

[Alessandra]

I don't really have any one of your dads. I envision killing. Well, like, dying. Like, I'm not doing the killing, but. Oh, him too. Oh, two of them, I guess. Two.

[Kale]

Those two don't bother me right now. It's the other one.

[Alessandra]

One of the first times I was ever, like, truly enraged by this ban. I had just started working with you, and I came in and you had just had a therapy appointment and you were hysterical. I literally racked my brain, like, no word of a lie, and thought, like, logistically, is there a way I could hire a hitman and this not come back on us?

[Kale]

No. I would say more recently, like, in recent real life news, I have seen so much about people getting caught with hit, like, trying to hire hitman, and.

[Alessandra]

I didn't know it was that easy. Well, you know, who are the hitman? The mob. The mob. They're the hit men.

[Kale]

It's just, like, so fascinating to me because, like, how would you. Even the black market.

[Alessandra]

You can get them.

[Kale]

Where do we get. How do we get there? I don't know anybody in the mob because the mob wasn't real to me. This is all for funsies. This is all for funsies. This is not real. It's like kill plots of murder.

[Alessandra]

But that's why you're too public. Like, we couldn't actually get a hitman.

[Kale]

No, we couldn't.

[Alessandra]

The way that technology is set up, I'm afraid to breathe wrong. Like, you would get caught for anything these days.

[Kale]

So outside of that, we're going to the game. My sister's here. What else? What else you have going on in Alessandro's world?

[Alessandra]

Nothing. My world is connected to yours pretty much. So whatever we got going, apparently. I'm going to London.

[Kale]

We're going to London in August.

[Alessandra]

That's exciting.

[Kale]

Kristen's like, I didn't know that was still Happening, but I guess it is.

[Alessandra]

I'm just gragging up. You didn't tell her? Tell her what? In conclusion, we're not on this planet. I have no plans of anything. Like, my plan is to make it to Jan1.

[Kale]

Yeah, no, no doubt. Like, I'm trying to make it to my first court date of 2026, which is February 19th.

[Alessandra]

Perfect. So leave us alone, please.

[Kale]

If you could just. Just refrain from causing any emotional distress between now and February 19th, that would be highly encouraged.

[Alessandra]

I just think, like, people don't really consider. Like. Like, we've talked. We talked about this recently, the three of us, where, like, they really think we have. Me and Kristen. Have you, like, tied up. And, like, we're only letting you out for public appearances. And we, like, control your every move, which is just the complete opposite of how this goes at all.

[Kale]

They think I'm under a conservative.

[Alessandra]

Like, they must. Because the way they treat like us, that we have any control over you. Like, tell Kale to do. What do you mean? Tell Kale to do what? What do you want me to tell Kale to do? I can't tell.

[Kale]

If y' all tell me to do it, I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it.

[Alessandra]

So I just. That is one of the things I really want people to take out of this is that we are all very. We're separate people. We're friends. We're all really good friends. We obviously work very closely together. I talk to the two of you more than I talk to anybody else in my life.

[Kale]

Sorry about that. You know.

[Alessandra]

No, it just is what it is. That is. And so I understand why we are connected, but I just really hope people take away that we are different people and we all each have our own struggles. But our struggles do intertwine.

[Kale]

Yeah, they do.

[Alessandra]

And like to understand that and that we're just all trying to, like, thought and thought out here. We're just trying to survive.

[Kale]

I am trying to thought and bop all over the place.

[Alessandra]

We're just thawing and bopping. And I don't control Kale. Please don't stop telling me to kill myself.

[Kale]

Please stop telling Kristen to kill themselves. Okay? We need people like them. I need them.

[Alessandra]

And please be nice to me. Yeah. And I just think, like, I don't know. I hope for 2026 it's a little more calm.

[Kale]

I don't know.

[Alessandra]

You know what's really funny, though? It's not always her. It's the other people in her circle sometimes. Mostly the men that are Stirring up the so. So then that stirs up this. We all should be lesbians.

[Kale]

Imagine a dating show where I find a woman.

[Alessandra]

What's your type for women? It's like more masculine, right?

[Kale]

Yeah. But I kind of like a switch moment. Like a neutral, like a stem. You know what I mean? Like, I feel like someone very like me who could go dress up or dress down.

[Alessandra]

It was cracking me up the other day because Billy came home from the coffee shop and he goes, oh, they have somebody there that I think you would really like. And then I went. And I was like, oh, yeah, I have a crush on her.

[Kale]

Her.

[Alessandra]

And he goes, she reminds me of you. And I go, I must be full of myself then, because I have a grush on her.

[Kale]

I have a crush on her. I feel like, yeah, that's like my. Someone like me. Yeah. So I could go either way. Yesterday, Kelsey was at the house. If y' all don't know who Kelsey is, she's an athletic director for Lincoln Sports. That's how I became friends with her. I have known her for some time, but she took a picture and sent it to the group chat. I'm in with her and she's like, she's looking a little gay today. And I was like, I look gay every day.

[Alessandra]

Every day.

[Kale]

Every day. Every day. Every day.

[Alessandra]

So in conclusion, be nice to us. Be a lesbian.

[Kale]

Be a lesbian. Speak up for important topics. Yeah.

[Alessandra]

And don't judge people for doing so. You know, be open minded to having conversations because I feel like everybody has problems with that. Be respectful when trying to say your opinion.

[Kale]

And not everything is offensive. Right. Like, stop being so easily offended. It's so fr. It's so annoying.

[Alessandra]

It's exhausting.

[Kale]

It's exhausting for the people that are trying to just. Just have like a regular conversation and an irregular conversation, watching everything they say because they don't know how it's going to be taken.

[Alessandra]

Or even on the back end, like editing.

[Kale]

Yeah.

[Alessandra]

Like, I'm considering, like, could somebody. Yes. Somebody could be offended by anything we say. So.

[Kale]

And also, don't hire a hitman.

[Alessandra]

Don't. And we actually won't. So if anybody we hate dies, we.

[Kale]

Had nothing to do to do with it. Nothing. And that is all, folks. Thanks for coming on. Where can people find you?

[Alessandra]

You can find me at Vibing with abg Vibing and kind of thriving will be back. So you can find me there and we'll talk about things that I talked about here. So be prepared for that. And yeah, love it.

[Kale]

Thanks for coming on of course.

[Alessandra]

Love ya.

[Kale]

See ya. SAT is free with all the best.

[Justin Sylvester]

Movies but longer days are brutal.

[Alessandra]

Tv for free. Stream blockbuster hits like 21 Jump Street.

[Justin Sylvester]

Ted, the Expendables and so much more on Pluto TV.

[Alessandra]

Stream now pay Never.

[Justin Sylvester]

I'm Justin Sylvester. And I'm Blakely Thornton. Join us for Yesterday's the podcast where we break down the most pivotal pop culture moments in history and give them the queer love that they deserve. The things that got us riled up during dial up, those makeouts that should have been breakouts and the drops that were cemented in pop. I'm talking Bennifer, Tyra versus Naomi, Tom Cruise jumping on that couch and so much more. So so please rate us subscribe to us on Apple podcasts, Spotify or anywhere you get audio related content. We also take Venmo and Cash app or credit card number as well. We're malleable, you know we're gay today.