Bawdy Storytelling Episode 65: “DangerSex” (Fay Romero)

Podcast: Bawdy Storytelling
Host: Dixie De La Tour
Release Date: March 14, 2019
Storyteller: Fay Romero
Theme: Honest-to-goodness stories of wild sexual escapades, with a focus on the exhilarating and terrifying edges of sexual liberation.

Episode Overview

This episode features storyteller Fay Romero, a fashion designer and event producer, as he recounts an unforgettable first date that veers into uncharted and dangerous territory. Fay’s story, told live at the Bawdy Storytelling 12th Anniversary show at San Francisco’s Verdi Club, explores the intersection of fear, excitement, and raw release during a sexual encounter that pushes his boundaries and triggers memories from his conservative religious upbringing. The episode, true to the Bawdy Storytelling tradition, is candid, hilarious, awkward, and ultimately liberating.

Main Discussion Points & Insights

Host Introduction & Context (03:50–04:43)

• Dixie celebrates the episode milestone: 30 episodes with producer Marty Garciano, emphasizing the collaborative creativity behind the show.
• Highlight of musical listener engagement: Dixie shouts out listener Sindri from Reykjavik, Iceland, for a sex-positive song recommendation.

The Story: “DangerSex” by Fay Romero

1. Setting the Scene & Online Dating Awkwardness (04:43–07:20)

• Fay shares how his online dating profile was full of quirks—“My mommy thinks I’m cute and my sister says I’m a good kisser”—and how this often left people unsure how to take him.
• He receives a message from a woman with the striking username “whiskey dick need not apply.”
• Chemistry sparks: Fay and Jessica, the woman from OkCupid, connect over motorcycles, parenthood, and their slightly offbeat personalities.
  • Quote (05:20): “If I get a message from someone with a screen name along the lines of ‘whiskey dick need not apply,’ oh, let’s just say I’m a curious little kitten.” – Fay Romero

2. At Jessica’s Place: From Connection to Intimacy (07:20–10:00)

• Jessica is revealed to be a therapist—the third therapist Fay has dated—making him question his ‘type.’
• The date escalates as they drink Johnnie Walker and move to physical intimacy, culminating in sensual caresses and undressing.
• Fay’s humorous pride in his sexual abilities:
  • Quote (09:07): “I know how to locate a clitoris, thank you very much. I hear this can be a problem.” – Fay Romero, greeted with raucous audience applause.

3. Things Take a Weird Turn: Flashbacks and Speaking in Tongues (10:00–13:50)

• As Fay performs oral sex, Jessica begins to whisper “I love you” and apologizes to “Adam”—not Fay’s name.
• Jessica’s utterances get more unintelligible and familiar, triggering Fay’s memories of being raised in the Pentecostal church, specifically witnessing “speaking in tongues” and exorcisms.
  • Quote (11:58): “I’m sitting there…waiting for her head to start spinning around like it did in the Exorcist.” – Fay Romero

4. Sex Becomes ‘Dangerous’ (13:50–16:00)

• Jessica’s sexual energy intensifies—thrashing, biting the pillow, nails leaving “eight lines of blood” on Fay’s back.
• Fay briefly considers stopping but instead surrenders to the wildness:
  • Quote (15:32): “Maybe this is kind of like an acid trip. Once that train leaves the station, it’s not stopping…so I decided to let my own inner demons out a little bit.”
• He describes the encounter as “danger sex”—where everything is on edge and anything could turn painful or risky at any moment.
• The sex crescendos to a shared, screaming orgasm.

5. Aftermath, Clarity, and Catharsis (16:00–18:23)

• Both lie spent and silent. Fay soon fabricates an excuse to leave.
• Jessica later calls to apologize, explaining that she’s started new seizure medication and hadn’t realized she shouldn’t mix it with alcohol.
  • Quote (18:06): “I know it got a little weird, and I’m sorry about that…I just realized I’m not supposed to have alcohol with it.”
• They awkwardly agree their connection likely won’t continue, but Fay recognizes a lesson:
  • Quote (19:54): “There’s a freedom in letting go. And to this day, I sure do love letting the demons out.”

Key Themes and Reflections

• Embracing the Unexpected: Sometimes, letting go of control brings both terror and release.
• Sexual Exploration vs. Past Trauma: Fay’s religious flashbacks intertwine humorously and poignantly with his present erotic experience.
• Communication & Consent: Even in chaotic circumstances, a post-encounter debrief clarifies consent and boundaries.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I’m not entirely sure how many times I’ve been afraid for my life. There was a time I crashed my motorcycle... and there was a time I was on a first date with a woman I met on OkCupid.” – Fay Romero, 04:50
• “She’s the third therapist in a row that I’ve gone out with. Apparently, I have a type.” – Fay Romero, 08:18
• “If you are sharing your pussy with me, I would much, much rather offer gratitude than any sort of preference. But honestly, I really enjoy seeing what I’m about to eat.” – Fay Romero, 09:38
• “She yells out, ‘Fuck me. Harder.’ …and we start having danger sex. You know what I’m talking about, right? That one where you know that the tiniest little move…will lead to a bruised taint, or God forbid, a broken dick.” – Fay Romero, 15:43
• “There are those traumatic moments that bring you closer together, and then there are the other ones. But I learned something that day. There’s a freedom in letting go.” – Fay Romero, 19:27

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |-----------|---------------------| | 04:43 | Fay begins “DangerSex” story with comedic setup about fear and online dating | | 07:20 | First date with Jessica, witty banter and mutual attraction | | 09:07 | “Secret weapon” and the “clitoris” applause moment | | 11:20 | Jessica begins whispering, speaking in tongues; religious flashback | | 13:50 | Sex reaches wild and dangerous intensity—pain/pleasure mix | | 16:00 | Aftermath, awkward exit, next-day phone call | | 19:27 | Fay’s concluding reflection on letting go |

Overall Tone and Style

Fay’s storytelling is raw, self-deprecating, witty, and vivid—the audience laughs and reacts throughout, but the humor never masks the honesty or the vulnerability at the heart of the story. Dixie’s hosting is warm and celebratory, setting a positive, inclusive, and sex-positive tone that invites listeners to embrace the full spectrum of human erotic experience.

Final Reflections

“DangerSex” is a pitch-perfect example of what Bawdy Storytelling does best: transforming intimate, uncomfortable, and even frightening moments into stories that are cathartic, relatable, and empowering. Fay’s willingness to “let the demons out” makes for a memorable tale that blends awkwardness and arousal, scare and surrender—offering listeners both laughter and something to ponder long after the episode ends.