Podcast Summary: Becoming NEXTonSCENE™ – "How to Create an Attractive Dating Profile that Translates!"

Release Date: July 10, 2025
Host: Jackie Zook
Guest: Dr. Susan Trotter, Relationship Coach and Psychologist

1. Introduction to Dr. Susan Trotter

In this engaging episode of Becoming NEXTonSCENE™, host Jackie Zook welcomes back Dr. Susan Trotter, a renowned relationship coach with over two decades of experience in psychology and therapy. Dr. Trotter shares her seamless transition from a clinical psychologist to a dedicated relationship coach, highlighting her expertise in guiding individuals through various relationship stages—from enhancing communication in existing relationships to navigating the complexities of online dating.

[02:38] Dr. Susan Trotter: "Having the clinical background is part of what makes me unique as a coach. It's really helpful in what I do with my clients."

2. Understanding the Online Dating Landscape

Dr. Trotter emphasizes the universal challenges individuals face in the dating world, regardless of age. She discusses how online dating has become a pivotal tool for meeting potential partners, stressing the importance of a well-crafted dating profile in making meaningful connections.

[04:00] Dr. Susan Trotter: "An online dating profile is important. It is the way that you convey who you are and what it might be like to date you."

3. Crafting the Perfect Online Dating Profile

a. The Power of First Impressions: Profile Photos

The conversation delves into the critical role of profile photos. Dr. Trotter explains that the primary photo is often the first and only impression potential matches get within seconds. She advocates for professional headshots that exude authenticity and personality, rather than overly staged or outdated images.

[05:05] Dr. Susan Trotter: "An ideal primary photo is a headshot with you smiling, looking into the camera, good light, good resolution, just like a business headshot. Right? Except that you don't want it to look like a business headshot."

She further advises against using old photos, as they can lead to mismatched expectations during in-person meetings.

[10:16] Dr. Susan Trotter: "But if you are going to meet people and you don't know at the very least that they're a decent person... you're inevitably going to end up disappointed over and over again."

b. Balancing Professional and Lifestyle Images

Jackie and Dr. Trotter discuss the balance between professional and lifestyle photos. While a professional headshot is essential for the primary photo, supplementary images can showcase hobbies, interests, and everyday moments to provide a well-rounded view of one's personality.

[07:56] Dr. Susan Trotter: "You can have a mix of photos that reflect your personality... engaged in your hobbies. So you can have a mix of pictures, but the primary one should be a headshot."

c. Profile Description: Showcasing Uniqueness and Values

Transitioning to the written aspect of the profile, Dr. Trotter emphasizes the importance of authenticity and specificity. Instead of generic statements like "I love walks on the beach," she encourages sharing unique experiences and values that genuinely reflect one's personality.

[14:10] Dr. Susan Trotter: "Instead of saying you're adventurous, you might say, 'I just came back from climbing Mount Kilimanjaro, and I'm already planning my next expedition.'"

She also underscores the necessity of clearly stating what one is looking for in a relationship, avoiding vague or common phrases to attract compatible matches.

[14:03] Dr. Susan Trotter: "You want to be clear about what kind of person and what kind of relationship you want."

4. Choosing the Right Dating Platform

Jackie inquires about the suitability of different dating apps and websites for various individuals. Dr. Trotter recommends platforms like Match for those new to online dating or those who haven't had positive experiences, due to its comprehensive profiles that allow for more detailed information sharing.

[19:12] Dr. Susan Trotter: "For people who are brand new to online dating... I tend to recommend that they start with a site like Match."

In contrast, she points out that apps like Bumble and Hinge, with their limited character counts and prompt-based profiles, may require more concise and impactful messaging.

[19:00] Dr. Susan Trotter: "On Bumble, you get a little window, maybe three or four sentences, and that's it."

5. Effective Communication: Messaging on Dating Platforms

Dr. Trotter provides valuable insights into utilizing the messaging features of dating platforms effectively. She advises asking open-ended questions to gather meaningful information about potential matches and to assess their communication style and compatibility.

[22:00] Dr. Susan Trotter: "Ask open-ended questions... because not only will you get information, but how they respond gives you information."

She warns against treating online dating as mere texting, which can lead to superficial connections and repeated disappointments.

[21:00] Dr. Susan Trotter: "What we put out is what we get back. Like if we're feeling really crappy about all of this, we're probably going to have a crappy experience."

6. Building Confidence and Authenticity

Throughout the discussion, Dr. Trotter highlights the significance of self-confidence and authenticity in the dating process. She encourages individuals to embrace who they are, as genuine self-presentation fosters healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

[11:38] Dr. Susan Trotter: "I really am all about people feeling confident and empowered, not just in this process, but in their lives in general."

7. Next Steps and How to Connect with Dr. Susan Trotter

At the episode's conclusion, Dr. Trotter shares her contact information for listeners seeking personalized coaching. She offers complimentary consultations to discuss individual relationship challenges and provides guidance on crafting effective dating profiles.

[23:23] Dr. Susan Trotter: "I offer a complimentary consultation as a starting point, just a chance for us to chat and for me to learn more about them and their situation."

Notable Quotes

• Dr. Susan Trotter [05:05]: "An ideal primary photo is a headshot with you smiling, looking into the camera, good light, good resolution, just like a business headshot. Right? Except that you don't want it to look like a business headshot."

• Dr. Susan Trotter [14:10]: "Instead of saying you're adventurous, you might say, 'I just came back from climbing Mount Kilimanjaro, and I'm already planning my next expedition.'"

• Dr. Susan Trotter [19:12]: "For people who are brand new to online dating... I tend to recommend that they start with a site like Match."

• Dr. Susan Trotter [22:00]: "Ask open-ended questions... because not only will you get information, but how they respond gives you information."

Conclusion

This episode of Becoming NEXTonSCENE™ provides a comprehensive guide to creating an attractive and authentic online dating profile. Dr. Susan Trotter's expert advice underscores the importance of genuine self-presentation, strategic use of photos, and effective communication strategies to enhance one's online dating experience. Listeners are encouraged to embrace their unique qualities and approach the dating world with confidence and clarity.

For personalized coaching and further assistance in crafting your dating profile, reach out to Dr. Susan Trotter:

• Email: susan.trotter@phdmail.com
• Website: susantratterphd.com
• Social Media: Available across various platforms

Embark on your journey to becoming NEXTonSCENE™ with expert guidance and insightful strategies from Dr. Susan Trotter.