Podcast Summary: Becoming NEXTonSCENE™
Episode Title: Reinventing the Holidays: Divorce and New Beginnings
Release Date: December 5, 2024
Host: Jackie Zook
Guest: Jolie Vacci, Founding Attorney at Foundations Family Law and Mediation Center
Introduction
In this enlightening episode of Becoming NEXTonSCENE™, host Jackie Zook welcomes Jolie Vacci, the founding attorney at Foundations Family Law and Mediation Center. The discussion delves deep into the complexities of divorce, especially during the holiday season, and explores new beginnings post-divorce. Jolie shares her journey into family law, the importance of mediation, the impact of recent legal changes on domestic violence cases, and personal insights into maintaining balance through hobbies and passions.
Host's Opening and Words of Wisdom
Jackie Zook opens the episode with motivational advice, encouraging listeners to take risks to achieve personal and professional growth. At [00:00], Jackie states:
"Take a risk this week... Even if it might scare the crap out of you. I think you'll be so happy that you did." [00:45]
This sets an empowering tone for the episode, aligning with the theme of reinventing oneself during challenging times.
Introducing Jolie Vacci
Jackie introduces Jolie Vacci as a founding attorney at Foundations Family Law and Mediation Center, highlighting her mission to resolve family law matters peacefully and efficiently. Jolie's dedication to helping clients navigate divorce with minimal conflict is emphasized, setting the stage for a comprehensive discussion on the topic.
Jolie's Journey into Family Law
At [02:43], Jackie praises Jolie for her expertise and entrepreneurial spirit, prompting her to share her path into family law. Jolie reveals her longstanding ambition to become an attorney, inspired by television shows like Law and Order and Ally McBeal. Without any family connections to the legal field, Jolie pursued law with determination:
"I fell in love with family law... my family is the most important thing to me." [04:14]
She underscores her commitment by becoming a certified mediator and specializing in domestic violence law, driven by a personal belief in the importance of family and the desire to help those navigating family loss.
Divorce Detox Podcast
Jolie introduces her co-hosted podcast, Divorce Detox, where she collaborates with Lisa Hap, a divorce coach and toxic relationship recovery expert. At [04:43], Jolie describes the podcast's raw and vulnerable nature:
"We don't hold back... we talk about the realities of family court, and there's a lot of realities that suck about them." [04:46]
The podcast serves as a platform to shed light on the often harsh realities of divorce, offering listeners practical advice and emotional support.
Divorce During the Holidays
A central theme of the episode is navigating divorce during the holiday season. At [05:30], Jolie discusses the common inclination of clients to delay divorce proceedings until after major holidays:
"Most divorces in the entire year are filed between January and March because people want to do it as like their new year resolution." [06:00]
She advises against postponing divorce during the holidays, explaining that the family court becomes heavily saturated in the early months of the year, making it more challenging to secure legal representation. Jolie recommends initiating divorce proceedings before the holiday rush to gain a strategic advantage and reduce waiting times.
Reasons People Stay in Unhappy Marriages
Jackie probes into why many individuals remain in unhappy or unhealthy marriages. Jolie attributes this tendency to societal shame and stigma surrounding divorce:
"Divorce is seen as a failure still in our society instead of a big, brave, bold decision." [06:55]
Additional factors include concerns about family ties, in-law relationships, and the desire to stay together for the sake of the children. Jolie emphasizes that most clients reach her office after enduring prolonged periods of dissatisfaction, leading them to prioritize co-parenting over maintaining a dysfunctional marriage.
Specialty in Domestic Violence Law and Legal Developments
Jolie highlights her firm's focus on representing survivors of domestic violence and coercive control. At [08:02], she discusses recent legal advancements in Massachusetts:
"Massachusetts just recently enacted a law that now domestic violence and abuse includes coercive control." [08:10]
This expansion of legal definitions allows more survivors to obtain restraining orders and access necessary support, particularly those experiencing non-physical abuse. Jolie underscores the importance of safety plans post-separation, recognizing that the immediate period after a divorce is the most vulnerable time for survivors.
The Role of Mediation in Divorce Proceedings
A significant portion of the conversation revolves around the benefits of mediation over traditional court processes. At [10:08], Jolie advocates for mediation as the "gold star of divorce":
"In mediation, you're controlling the terms of your divorce... it's an empowering thing." [10:15]
She contrasts this with the adversarial nature of court litigations, where decisions are imposed by a judge, often leading to public disclosures of personal matters. Mediation offers a private, cost-effective, and swift alternative, allowing couples to collaboratively decide on asset division, custody arrangements, and other crucial aspects of their separation.
Statistics on Mediation vs. Court Proceedings
Jackie inquires about the prevalence of mediation compared to court filings. Jolie provides insightful statistics at [12:38]:
"Only 20% mediate a lot originally start by filing in court... about 90% of those cases end up settling before trial." [12:45]
This suggests that while mediation is not the initial choice for most, the majority ultimately reach settlements, highlighting the effectiveness of mediation in resolving disputes amicably.
Timeline and Efficiency of Divorce Processes
The episode touches on the varying timelines associated with mediation and court-based divorces. Jolie explains at [13:23]:
"In mediation, finalizing the divorce can only take a couple of months... divorces in Massachusetts... average about 12 to 18 months." [13:30]
She emphasizes that mediation can significantly reduce the duration of divorce proceedings, offering a more efficient path to closure compared to the prolonged timelines often experienced in court.
Foundations Family Law and Team Building
Jolie shares the growth and structure of her law firm, founded in May 2023. At [15:18], she highlights the collaborative team environment:
"We are up to a team of six now, which I am thrilled about." [15:25]
The firm includes two additional attorneys, a director of business operations (her husband), and an office liaison handling intakes and billing. Jolie contrasts her current approach with her previous experience at an aggressive, litigation-heavy law firm, opting instead for a solution-focused, compassionate methodology that aligns with the values of their clients.
Ideal Clients for Foundations Family Law
At [16:59], Jolie defines the profile of their ideal clients:
"Our typical clients are somewhere in their midlife, usually have a couple of kids, and are educated... they want to focus on getting through the divorce while maintaining their family system as much as possible." [17:05]
Foundations Family Law caters to individuals seeking fair and peaceful resolutions, particularly those prioritizing the well-being of their children. Jolie emphasizes the importance of focusing on co-parenting and minimizing conflict to ensure a stable environment for the children post-divorce.
Personal Insights and Fun Facts about Jolie
To provide a personal touch, the conversation shifts to Jolie's hobbies and interests. She shares her passion for homesteading, raising chickens, ducks, and goats, and making goat milk soap. At [19:14], Jolie describes her soap-making process:
"You have to have precise measurements... it is a time-consuming process." [19:25]
Additionally, Jolie recounts her unique experience as a former beauty pageant winner during high school, adding a relatable and humorous dimension to her persona.
Hobbies: Homesteading and Soap Making
Jolie elaborates on her soap-making hobby, which she took up during the COVID-19 pandemic as a form of stress relief. She enjoys the precision and creativity involved in crafting unique soaps, often selling them at farmers' markets with her husband.
"It's like, when do you have time? This is very important." [20:26]
Former Beauty Pageant Winner
At [20:45], Jolie shares a lighthearted anecdote about winning a Miss Dartmouth competition in high school, highlighting her multifaceted personality and ability to embrace diverse experiences.
Treasure Hunting and Collecting
Jolie reveals her love for treasure hunting, particularly vintage items and unique collectibles. She enjoys exploring antique stores with her husband, adding another layer of interest to her dynamic life.
"We like to go treasure hunting and find some unique, like, fun item." [21:31]
Her collection of glass chickens, known as "hens on nest," is a testament to her playful and organized nature.
How to Connect with Jolie and Foundations Family Law
In the concluding segment, Jolie provides information on how listeners can reach her and her firm:
"The best place is to go to our website. It's FoundationsFamilyLaw@gmail.com and that is all of our socials." [22:48]
She mentions their presence on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn, as well as her Divorce Detox podcast available on all major platforms. This offers multiple avenues for potential clients to connect and access resources.
Conclusion
Jackie Zook wraps up the episode by commending Jolie for her insightful contributions and dedication to fostering peaceful resolutions in family law. She encourages listeners to explore Foundations Family Law and stay tuned for future episodes featuring more inspiring guests.
"Everyone needs to check out Jolie and Foundations Family Law. Thank you so much for coming on today. You are a rock star." [23:05]
This episode serves as a valuable resource for anyone navigating the challenges of divorce, offering practical advice, emotional support, and a glimpse into the potential for new beginnings.
Key Takeaways:
- Timing of Divorce: Initiating divorce proceedings before the holiday season can expedite the process and reduce legal complications.
- Mediation Advantages: Mediation offers a private, cost-effective, and empowering alternative to traditional court litigations, fostering better post-divorce relationships, especially for co-parenting.
- Support for Domestic Violence Survivors: Recent legal changes in Massachusetts expand protections for survivors of non-physical abuse, facilitating safer and more accessible divorce processes.
- Client-Centric Approach: Foundations Family Law prioritizes fair and peaceful resolutions, focusing on the well-being of children and maintaining family systems post-divorce.
- Personal Balance: Engaging in hobbies and personal passions, such as homesteading and soap making, aids in stress relief and maintaining work-life balance.
Listeners are encouraged to leverage the insights shared in this episode to navigate their own journeys toward becoming next on scene, embracing new beginnings with courage and informed strategies.