Betrayal: Weekly - Episode 17: Ryan

Host: Andrea Gunning
Release Date: November 7, 2024
Podcast: Betrayal: Weekly by iHeartPodcasts and Glass Podcasts

Introduction

In Episode 17 of Betrayal: Weekly, host Andrea Gunning delves into the harrowing story of Ryan Lewis, a former fitness instructor whose life was upended by deceit and manipulation. Ryan's journey from trust to betrayal offers profound insights into the complexities of human relationships and the resilience required to rebuild after profound heartbreak.

Early Life and Background of Ryan Lewis

Andrea Gunning introduces Ryan as a vibrant individual with an infectious energy. Growing up outside of Philadelphia in a supportive, academically ambitious family, Ryan found his passion early on.

• Ryan: "Sometimes I bring my teaching home with me in terms of, like, making somebody's day or making somebody's life better or whatever it is." [03:58]

Ryan's involvement in theater during his teenage years showcased his dedication and the unwavering support of his family.

• Ryan: "As a teenager, I got into theater and my parents were at every performance...this was like my varsity jacket moment." [04:51]

After graduating high school, Ryan attended NYU, where his personal life took a tumultuous turn. He entered a relationship with a man 11 years his senior, which introduced him to drug use that would later become a critical turning point in his life.

• Ryan: "He was very noticeably high. And he was like, are we going out tonight or something? And I was like, nope." [06:00]

This relationship spiraled into a cycle of drug use and deception, leading Ryan to seek help and ultimately achieve sobriety.

• Ryan: "I went to do what would be my last line...this realization of, like, I think this party is...I had to come clean to him that I had used again." [06:00 - 07:31]

Ten years of sobriety transformed Ryan, realigning his priorities towards his true passion: fitness.

• Ryan: "I just like to come from a really authentic place." [07:59]

Meeting and Relationship with Jacques

Ryan's life took a promising turn when he met Jacques, a charismatic and accomplished marketing executive. Their connection was immediate and intense, leading Ryan to relocate to Miami to build a life together.

• Jacques: "We both really wanted a Ford Bronco really badly...we had bought one." [40:49]

Their relationship thrived on mutual support, shared passions, and emotional vulnerability. Jacques's impressive career, multilingual abilities, and commitment to health mirrored Ryan's own values, creating a seemingly perfect partnership.

• Andrea Gunning: "He was a very decorated marketing professional... It wasn't just his resume that impressed Ryan, it was also his commitment to health and fitness." [18:28 - 19:08]

Ryan felt an unparalleled connection, believing Jacques was the person he had been waiting for.

• Ryan: "We were texting, like, all day, every day... a foundation has been set." [20:07]

The Betrayal Unfolds

Despite the harmonious facade, signs of deception began to surface. Ryan’s parents noticed irregularities, prompting him to investigate further.

• Ryan: "When he quit his executive marketing job out of the blue... I couldn't believe something was wrong." [25:15 - 25:37]

A fraudulent charge of $990 for a divorce lawyer on Ryan's credit card was the first red flag. This discovery led to a confrontation with Jacques, who initially denied any wrongdoing.

• Ryan: "He was visibly denying it, even though the evidence was right there." [32:09]

Further investigations revealed multiple layers of deceit. Jacques had maintained multiple identities, engaged in fraudulent activities, and maintained numerous deceptive conversations with other men.

• Andrea Gunning: "For each person he talked to, Jacques was putting on a totally different persona." [34:16]

Ryan uncovered that Jacques had been involved in fraudulent schemes related to illegal subletting and unpaid rent, amounting to over $100,000 in fraud.

• Andrea Gunning: "Jacques was named in a lawsuit over an illegal sublet and unpaid rent scheme in the Hamptons." [39:22]

Confrontation and Discovery

The emotional climax of Ryan's story revolves around his confrontation with Jacques. Faced with undeniable proof of betrayal, Ryan navigated the tumultuous emotions of anger, confusion, and heartbreak.

• Ryan: "Do you recognize these numbers?" [32:09]

Jacques’s breakdown revealed his vulnerabilities and mirrored Ryan’s own struggles with trust and betrayal.

• Jacques: "This feels like my emotional rock bottom, and this is my chance to pay it forward." [37:28]

Despite setting new boundaries and attempting to rebuild trust through therapy, the layers of deception proved too deep to overcome.

Aftermath and Emotional Impact

The financial and emotional toll on Ryan was immense. Jacques not only manipulated Ryan emotionally but also perpetrated significant financial fraud, resulting in a loss of approximately $50,000.

• Andrea Gunning: "How much money did Ryan lose in this relationship? This is what he estimates it is." [48:11]

Ryan's relationship with his parents was strained as they uncovered the full extent of Jacques's deceit, leading to a rift that underscored the severity of the betrayal.

• Ryan: "I felt so bad because I didn't believe my parents or I didn't want to listen to them." [43:14]

The betrayal extended beyond personal loss, touching Ryan's professional life and social circles, leaving him grappling with trust and rebuilding his sense of self.

Ryan's Reflections and Moving Forward

In the aftermath, Ryan confronts the profound impact of Jacques's betrayal. He recognizes the manipulation tactics employed, including Jacques's invasive behavior, such as listening to his therapy sessions through a ring camera.

• Ryan: "It was total manipulation to make me feel like Jacques truly saw me, understood me, loved me." [47:53]

This realization propelled Ryan towards healing, emphasizing the importance of self-care, rebuilding trust, and learning from the painful experience to foster resilience and personal growth.

• Andrea Gunning: "Ryan's ready to let go of the shame and self-blame he felt after this betrayal." [50:39]

Ryan's story serves as a cautionary tale about the complexities of trust, the importance of vigilance in relationships, and the strength required to overcome profound personal betrayals.

Notable Quotes

• Ryan Lewis:
  "I wanted to wake up every morning excited for what I got to do." [08:37]
  "This feels like my emotional rock bottom, and this is my chance to pay it forward." [37:28]

• Jacques:
  "He sounds like your mom right now." [40:30]

• Andrea Gunning:
  "This is a story about the people we trust the most and the deceptions that change everything." [03:10]

Conclusion

Ryan Lewis's story encapsulates the devastating effects of betrayal by someone once deeply trusted. Through meticulous storytelling, Andrea Gunning presents a narrative that highlights the nuances of deceit, the complexities of rebuilding trust, and the enduring strength of the human spirit. Betrayal: Weekly continues to offer listeners profound insights into the aftermath of broken trust, reminding us of the resilience required to navigate and overcome personal betrayals.

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Episode Production Credits:

• Executive Producers: Nancy Glass and Jennifer Faison
• Host/Producer: Andrea Gunning
• Writers/Producers: Monique Laborde, Ben Federman
• Associate Producers: Kristen Melcuri and Caitlin Golden
• iHeart Team: Ali Perry and Jessica Kryncheck
• Audio Editing and Mixing: Matt D'Alvecchio, with additional support from Nico Aruka and Tanner Robbins
• Theme Music: Oliver Baines Music Library provided by MIB Music

Join the countless listeners who find solace, inspiration, and understanding through the real-life stories shared on Betrayal: Weekly.