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TJ Maxx Advertiser
This is an I Heart podcast.
Anna Bay Sofa Advertiser
It starts like any other night. The glass of red, the cozy blanket, then the drop. The stain. So dark, so stubborn it might as well have been a crime scene. But this isn't your average couch. This is Anna Bay. Fully washable, unspeakably comfortable, and ready for whatever your life, your kids or your ex throws at it. And here's the kicker. Starting at just $6.99, you can make sure your sofa isn't part of the problem. Fully washable, stain resistant, and built to hide even the darkest defenses. Right now, get up to 60% off with their early access Black Friday sale because no one should have to live with a stain that won't quit. Anna Bay the only mystery you won't be losing sleep over shop washablesofas.com today that's washablesofas.com.
TJ Maxx Advertiser
Making the holidays magical for everyone on your list it's no small feat, but with TJ Maxx, your magic multiplies with quality finds arriving daily through Christmas Eve, you'll save on luxe cashmere, the latest tech toys and more. So you can check off every name on your list and treat yourself to a holiday look that'll turn heads. Now you know where to go to make all that holiday magic. It's TJ Maxx. Of course, it's shaping up to be a very magical holiday.
Andrea Gunning
Did a GLP1 help you lose weight? But now you're noticing unwanted facial changes. The weight came off, but facial volume loss and dull, sagging skin are making you look older. That's where the next phase of your weight loss journey comes in. There's before, weight loss, after weight loss and the after. After help restore and refresh your facial skin and reclaim your natural looking youthful glow. To learn more, visit faceafterweightloss.com that's faceafterweightloss.com for those drawn to thrill, luxury and off the beaten path escapes. Virgin Voyages delivers. With no kids on board and over $1,000 in value included, this is a voyage designed for adult adventure seekers. Enjoy Wi Fi 20 plus dining options, entertainment and group fitness all included. Set sail through the Caribbean this winter or explore bold new destinations in 2025 like Aruba and St. Lucia. Unexpected luxury, high seas, excitement and zero hidden fees. Learn more at Virgin voyages.com or contact your travel advisor.
Helen Naylor
There's this feeling that mums are good. No matter what, mums are good. Even if they do the wrong thing, it's because they love you so much. If you need to accept the lie to live, then you accept the lie.
Andrea Gunning
I'm Andrea Gunning and this is Betrayal, A show about the people we trust the most and the deceptions that change everything. Today we're telling Helen Naylor's story. Helen grew up in the midlands of the uk.
Helen Naylor
The place where I was born was a really little town, so you basically knew everybody. And I'd walk through town and bump into 10 people I knew.
Andrea Gunning
She was an only child. Her parents were Eleanor and Alan.
Helen Naylor
We lived in a really nice three bedroom semi detached which was painted yellow with a bright blue door. They have very 70s taste in decor, so like swirly brown carpets and very peach. If there was a color choice, it was peach.
Andrea Gunning
Helen's parents were older than her friend's parents.
Helen Naylor
Mum was 35 when she had me. My dad was over 40 and at the time that was quite a big deal.
Andrea Gunning
Helen was very young when her dad's health took a turn for the worse.
Helen Naylor
When I was 7, my dad was diagnosed with heart and lung problems. He had cardiomyopathy and asthma that eventually became emphysema.
Andrea Gunning
Not long after her dad's diagnosis, Helen's mom, Eleanor, also got sick. She stopped getting out of bed and stopped being able to play with Helen. She was diagnosed with me. Myalgic encephalomyelitis, also known as chronic fatigue syndrome. It can cause muscle and joint pain, dizziness and headaches.
Helen Naylor
The most common symptom is extreme tiredness, making any activities difficult. Going for a shower, going to work, you can not sleep well, you can have problems cognitively.
Andrea Gunning
ME can cause debilitating exhaustion. It's chronic and there is no cure. The disease sometimes occurs after a viral infection, kind of like a long Covid. Treatments are designed to help patients manage their symptoms and learn to adjust to a much slower pace of life.
Helen Naylor
My mom used to say if she wanted to do something, she'd have to spend a week resting to prepare to do that thing. And then a week after resting to get over it.
Andrea Gunning
Her mom retired early because of her illness. So from the age of seven on, Helen grew up with two sick parents. Her life revolved around their illnesses.
Helen Naylor
It completely shaped my life. I was the child of two disabled people and that was my identity.
Andrea Gunning
While her friends were in first grade learning to read, Helen was worrying about her parents, especially her mom.
Helen Naylor
Although I knew that my dad's illnesses were more serious, life revolved around my mum.
Andrea Gunning
Her mom's chronic fatigue took over their family's life completely. Eleanor slept for 18 hours a day and didn't even have Enough energy to walk to the mailbox.
Helen Naylor
She wouldn't walk me to the end of the road. We're talking like a small road with a corner shop at the bottom. And she wouldn't walk me there because she couldn't. She would be in bed every afternoon that I remember. We didn't go out at weekends.
Andrea Gunning
On the rare occasion that they did leave the house together, they had to adapt their activities around her mom if they went shopping. Eleanor rode a mobility scooter as a teenager.
Helen Naylor
That was so embarrassing. Like already I had these parents who were older and they stood out. And now she was on this scooter like hurling around the shopping center. I was just so mortified.
Andrea Gunning
But over time, Helen got over the embarrassment and learned to accept her mom. Helen became her primary caretaker because they didn't have any extended family nearby. And Helen's dad spent most nights at the pub drinking.
Helen Naylor
My dad was a really isolated figure. He didn't have many friends. He wasn't at work, he didn't have close family members. He was a functioning alcoholic, 100%. I can't remember seeing him anything but a happy drunk. He wasn't aggressive, but undoubtedly he was an alcoholic.
Andrea Gunning
So Helen and her mom leaned on each other. It was them against the world.
Helen Naylor
I had a really close relationship with my mum. She was my best friend. I talked to her about everything. I absolutely adored her. I thought she was perfect, absolutely perfect.
Andrea Gunning
But her mom needed a lot of.
Helen Naylor
Support and there was a sense of if my mum said jump, then you had to jump.
Andrea Gunning
Helen would come home from school and go straight to her mom's bedside. She'd sit on the edge of the bed and tell her mom about her day. Then Helen would make her mom a snack and set up a place for her to rest on the couch.
Helen Naylor
We would watch some TV together and drink a cup of tea. I felt very, very responsible for her. I was responsible for my parents happiness and my parents emotional stability.
Andrea Gunning
Eleanor's ME was debilitating. But over time she found other people who struggled with the same symptoms.
Helen Naylor
She was part of an ME group in the town and ended up leading it. And so every week she would have to sort of run these meetings. She'd do all this research to then write newsletters for the ME group.
Andrea Gunning
Helen was proud of her mom for finding purpose and community even though she was struggling with her disease.
Helen Naylor
She actually won an award for being a health champion.
Andrea Gunning
Helen's mom went to bed early every night.
Helen Naylor
My mum would go to bed, my dad would go down the pub and I was just left to entertain myself. It was important that I was silent because if I made any noise, then I would wake my mum. So I would watch TV with subtitles on and no sound.
Andrea Gunning
When her own world in her little yellow house got too small, Helen. Helen escaped into her dream world. She loved to write.
Helen Naylor
I wrote a lot of stories. I wrote a story about a girl who went into her loft and disappeared into a wonderful alternative reality with a happy family. I used to dance around the garden singing. I'm sure the neighbors loved it.
Andrea Gunning
One day when Helen was 8, she overheard her mom talking about her dad's health.
Helen Naylor
I heard my mum say, the doctor said he could just drop dead at any minute. I remember switching round and looking at her absolutely horrified. And that weighed on me for the rest of my childhood.
Andrea Gunning
Hearing that shifted Helen's mindset. Even as a child, she felt responsible for her mom. She also learned to be extremely tuned into her mom. She tried to do whatever she could to make her happy. Over time, Helen lost track of where her mom's needs ended and where hers began.
Helen Naylor
She used to tell me my likes and dislikes. I liked salad, I liked strawberries. Those were my favorites. I defer to her opinion.
Andrea Gunning
Helen learned to look to her mom for answers. She idolized her. As a teenager, Helen missed out on typical teenage experiences because as soon as school ended, she went home to take care of her parents.
Helen Naylor
In my teens, my average day would look like I would get up and go to school. My parents were both at home all day, every day. My dad would go to the pub every day. Then my mum would go for a nap every day. And then I'd come home and it was just all very insulated.
Andrea Gunning
But then when Helen was 16, there was finally a break from their quiet, careful routine.
Helen Naylor
We went on this like once in a lifetime holiday. We decided to go to America.
Andrea Gunning
They planned to spend a few days in Chicago, Then two weeks vacationing in Wisconsin and visiting extended family that lived there. Helen was worried about the strain the trip would take on her mom.
Helen Naylor
We went to the airport and she was in a wheelchair being wheeled to the airplane.
Andrea Gunning
But to Helen's surprise, we got to.
Helen Naylor
America and for two weeks she was just a normal mum. She was walking around, literally. We had a non stop holiday. We did something every single day. We went to water shows, water parks. We got up in the morning and went to a diner and then went and saw my cousins and then went out for the day and did something ridiculously American. And then we did something in the evening. It was Just this incredible experience for me, like life changing. And what was the most amazing was that my parents were both well. My mum said the heat made my dad's chest better.
Andrea Gunning
The climate also seemed to help with her mom's chronic fatigue.
Helen Naylor
I just thought, oh my goodness, America has cured my parents. America has made them better.
Andrea Gunning
Helen was ecstatic. It was like she slipped into a better world where her parents were healthy and they were a normal, happy family. But the dream didn't last.
Helen Naylor
We got on the plane to come home and we got back to the UK and she was back in that wheelchair being wheeled back through the airport as if the last two weeks hadn't happened. It was a huge moment for me. I saw what my life could be like and I was like, why are we not going to America? Why are we not packing up and going? Because you could be well, you tell me all the time how you wish you could be well. We've got the answer. Lets just go. I prayed every night for my parents to be better. The idea that it was within grasp was just like I couldn't understand.
Andrea Gunning
The stories you hear on betrayal remind us what happens when trust is broken. This holiday, you can help your child write a different kind of story. One built on trust, freedom, and that first unforgettable ride. Introducing Guardian Bikes. The easiest, safest and quickest way for kids to learn to ride. No tiers and no training wheels needed. That's why Guardian is America's favorite kids bike and the New York Times and Wirecutter's top pick three years in a row. And because every frame is crafted right here in America, you're not just giving a gift, you're supporting the people who build it. This holiday season, give a gift that lasts far beyond the wrapping paper. Visit guardianbikes.com to save over 40% on all bikes, plus a free $100 accessory bundle with every order. Guardian Bikes, the story of their first ride starts here.
Anna Bay Sofa Advertiser
It starts like any other night. The glass of red, the cozy blanket. Then the drop. The stain. So dark, so stubborn, it might as well have been a crime scene. But this isn't your average couch. This is Anna Bay. Fully washable, unspeakably comfortable and ready for whatever your life, your kids or your ex throws at it. And here's the kicker. Starting at just 6:99, you can make sure your sofa isn't part of the problem. Fully washable, stain resistant, and built to hide even the darkest defenses. Right now, get up to 60% off with their early access Black Friday sale because no one should have to live with a stain that won't quit. Annabe the only mystery you won't be losing sleep over shop washablesofas.com today that's washablesofas.com.
Andrea Gunning
Home security systems are a great tool to keep you and your family safe from intruders. And now, thanks to SimpliSafe, there's a new way to stop someone from entering your home. SimpliSafe's AI powered cameras detect threats while they're still outside your home and alert real security agents. From there. The agents confront the intruder, letting them know they're being watched on camera and that the police are on their way. Simplisafe's monitoring agents have your back and talk to intruders for you. SimpleLife has a 60 day money back guarantee, so you can try it and see the difference for yourself. I use SimpliSafe myself and really value the added safety it provides. It was easy to set up and has been incredibly reliable since even when I'm traveling to report on a story for betrayal, the SimpliSafe app makes it easy to check on my home from afar. I use Simplisafe and if you're looking for a security system, I recommend you do too. Right now, my listeners can save 50% on a SimpliSafe home security system at simplisafe.com betrayal that's simplisafe.com betrayal there's no safe like Simplisafe.
TJ Maxx Advertiser
Making the holidays magical for everyone on your list, it's no small feat, but with TJ Maxx, your magic multiplies with quality finds. Arriving daily through Christmas Eve, you'll save on luxe cashmere, the latest tech toys, and more. So you can check off every name on your list and treat yourself to a holiday look that'll turn heads. Now you know where to go to make all that holiday magic. It's TJ Maxx. Of course, it's shaping up to be a very magical holiday.
Andrea Gunning
On a family trip to the U.S. helen's mom, who was normally chronically ill and stuck in bed, experienced major relief from her symptoms. Her dad, who had serious heart and lung problems, was doing much better too. On their trip. Both her parents had energy and they went on adventures together every day. Helen was overjoyed they had found a cure for her parents America. But when they got back to England, their symptoms became as debilitating as they were before. Helen wasn't ready to accept that this was their normal again.
Helen Naylor
It was a huge moment in that I saw what my life could be like. And I was like, why are we not going to America? Why are we not packing up and going? Because you could be. Well, you tell me all the time how you work. Wish she could be, well, we've got the answer, let's just go.
Andrea Gunning
But her parents didn't want to move to the us so Helen channeled her energy into doing well in school so that she could have a life of her own.
Helen Naylor
I did really well in my A levels and then off I went to university and I went to Nottingham, which isn't even the top three cities in the UK yet. I felt like I was in this enormous city that was totally overwhelming. I walked through town and I didn't see anyone I knew. That was really shocking to me.
Andrea Gunning
Helen had spent her childhood and teenage years hyper focused on her parents health, living in a town where she knew everyone. When she left for college she was plunged into a completely foreign world.
Helen Naylor
I did feel really lost. It was scary, it was obviously brilliant because I never thought I'd get away. The freedom was incredible. At the same time, I hadn't been given any life skills by my parents.
Andrea Gunning
Helen didn't have the same street smarts or life experiences as her peers, but she certainly knew how to take care of herself. She'd been doing it since she was seven.
Helen Naylor
So although it was a really steep learning curve, I had the skills to do it and I had the confidence that I'd been doing this forever and that I could do it again.
Andrea Gunning
Sure enough, Helen found her stride at college and during her first year there she met a boy named Peter.
Helen Naylor
I met Peter through friends. We used to meet up with another guy and another girl and just hang out. Peter would walk me home and we got chatting and I found out that his dad had also had heart problems and he just understood the situation that I was in in a way that no one else understood.
Andrea Gunning
Helen and Peter began to spend more and more time together. The connection between them was instant.
Helen Naylor
We got together and we got engaged after six months. We got married 12 months later. It was all very whirlwind but at 21 you feel like a proper grown up, so that's what you do.
Andrea Gunning
But Eleanor was not welcoming to Peter.
Helen Naylor
She was very mocking about my relationship, like, are you going to call your lover? Do you love him, Helen? Are you in love with, with him? There was no safeguarding, there was no sort of like, well hold on, let me check this person out and see what I think of them. If you're going to marry them and like you're Going to marry them six months after you started dating them. Like, that's actually ridiculous. You're 20. My parents didn't do any of that. They were just like, oh, great, let's arrange the wedding.
Andrea Gunning
At first, Helen struggled to accept that Peter actually wanted to be with her.
Helen Naylor
I spent a long time thinking that I'd put on a mask when he met me and that I tricked him into marrying me.
Andrea Gunning
Shortly after Helen and Peter got married, Helen's dad collapsed and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Helen Naylor
His health declined significantly after that. So then he was on oxygen. The last two years of his life were, were a nightmare. He was just having heart attacks all the time. It would be like 4am phone calls saying, this is it, you've got to come. And I remember jumping in the car with my husband and rushing, thinking, are we going to make it? Are we going to make it?
Andrea Gunning
Her whole life, Helen had been afraid that her dad could die at any minute. But during those two years, the constant hum of worry grew into a fever pitch.
Helen Naylor
I went into a real period of depression, really, really struggled dealing with that situation. Me and my husband had visited one weekend. We got the phone call, then went straight upstairs to where he was in the ward. The nurse said, I'm really sorry, but he's passed away. And my mum just collapsed to the floor. And I don't even remember crying initially because it was all about looking after my mom and caring for her and making sure she was okay. I remember holding his hand and he was still warm. His eyes were open. And I was like, this is weird, his eyes are open. And my mom was so snappy with me and was like, well, just close them then. And I got really upset. It just sort of finally hit me and I said, I don't want to leave without him. And my mum said, well, this is it, isn't it, Helen? He's dead. Of course he's not going to come with us.
Andrea Gunning
Eleanor had no room for her daughter's grief.
Helen Naylor
This was her moment and it wasn't about me. After his death, she used to say to me, it was just your dad, but it was my husband. So every single occasion that could possibly bring up those feelings for her, I would send her flowers, I would call, I would really make a big deal of it. And for years, years and years, she didn't even acknowledge that Father's Day might be a bit difficult for me.
Andrea Gunning
As the years went on, Helen remained her mom's caretaker.
Helen Naylor
Because she was my mum and because I was an only child, it wasn't like I could just say, right, I'm married now. See you later. I couldn't let her go. I felt very, very responsible for her. We would have her to our house every Christmas and it would be really strained. I hated Christmas because Peter really, really struggled with my mum's behavior. My mum would be attention seeking and difficult, and I felt like I just had to keep the peace.
Andrea Gunning
Helen and Peter had been trying for a baby and had suffered a difficult miscarriage. Finally, Helen became pregnant. But the pregnancy was quickly overshadowed.
Helen Naylor
At exactly the same time, my mum got a diagnosis of Parkinson's disease. The consultant called it mild Parkinsonism.
Andrea Gunning
Despite the early diagnosis, her mom's health was declining quickly.
Helen Naylor
She was getting worse and worse. So she was getting more medication. She was going to these Parkinson's support groups. She wasn't interested in how my pregnancy was going. She wasn't interested in what's happening, scans I'd had. She wasn't interested in me thinking about baby names. She just wanted to talk about Parkinson's disease.
Andrea Gunning
Soon, Eleanor required constant care and moved into a nursing home.
Helen Naylor
She started having falls, and it was happening so frequently that the paramedics were actually told on her notes not to take her to hospital.
Andrea Gunning
Helen tried to be there for her mom. It was hard to see her struggling in this way. She visited the nursing home often, and one day they had plans to go shopping in town together. So Helen went to go pick her mom up. When she got there, her mom was sitting on the couch.
Helen Naylor
And then she sort of pretended to fall. It was very slow motion. And when she got to the floor, she said, oh, my goodness, did you see that? I just fell off the sofa. And I was like, not really. And she said, I need to go to bed. And I was like, okay, come on then. You know, I'll help you up and I'll put you to bed. And she said, I can't walk. You'll have to carry me. And I said, well, I'll help you, but, like, I can't carry you, you know, come on, get up. And she sort of turned demonic. She was sort of crawling along the floor and saying, fine, I'll crawl there then. Is this what you want? Is this what you want from me, you little bitch?
Andrea Gunning
Her mom had never used a word like that before, and it shook Helen.
Helen Naylor
It was kind of terrifying. So I ended up hiding in the kitchen thinking, what am I going to do? I tried calling Peter and he was like, just leave. But I didn't feel like I could leave.
Andrea Gunning
After that, Helen stopped visiting her husband, Peter, supported her decision to pull back from her mother.
Helen Naylor
We were having to kind of back off her more and more, and we would just be like, okay, she can't be around the children anymore.
Andrea Gunning
Eleanor's health was declining rapidly. Doctors were constantly scrambling to help her and find answers.
Helen Naylor
She bound her hands up into fists so that she couldn't unclench them. She wasn't eating. She was just getting worse and worse. She was referred to a hospital where they did every test under the sun. They literally tested her for everything. And eventually they said that they had found nothing physically or mentally wrong with my mum, but she would die in the next few months. By that point, I'd spent three, four years banging my head on a brick wall, trying to get someone to listen to me, to say, this isn't right. Something's wrong, and I need you to find out what's going on. And they basically said to me, we've tested her for everything and we can't help.
Andrea Gunning
Doctors had run out of ways to help her mom, and Helen had too.
Helen Naylor
I tried to stay in contact with her, but she didn't really want it, obviously. It was a massive decision not to go and see her in her final months. I decided it was better this way. I mean, that's a horrible decision to make and not something I took lightly. But actually having contact with her was more damaging.
Andrea Gunning
It was painful for Helen not to visit. She still loved her mom very much. She got occasional updates from the medical team. One day, the call was different.
Helen Naylor
I'd had this phone call a few days earlier saying, your mum's got a mouth infection. I was like, okay, so will you let me know how that goes then? And, like, call me back in a few days? And they were like, well, yeah, it might not be that long. A few days later, they rang me and they said, your mum's died.
Andrea Gunning
For a moment, everything stood still. Helen's mom had been the center of her attention for her entire life. Her mom's sickness had been the guiding force in every decision she made. And now it was all over. With her gone. Everything was all mixed up. Nothing made sense, not even her own grief.
Helen Naylor
It was a shock. It was a real shock because we were estranged. I think quite a few people thought I wouldn't grieve, or perhaps I wouldn't feel sad about it. It's just such a complex grief. It isn't straightforward, it isn't normal. It was worse than my dad. My dad. I was sad, but it was really straightforward. I missed him and I was sad. That he was gone. Whereas this was so much more complex.
Andrea Gunning
Ever since she was a little girl, Helen used her writing as a tool to make sense of her messy and confusing world.
Helen Naylor
That's a way of me making sense of things and getting things straight in my head. So it was kind of a natural reaction for me to write about what had happened.
Andrea Gunning
Helen began writing a book about her life with her mom. And as a part of her writing process, she decided to read her mom's diaries.
Helen Naylor
I knew that my mum had written daily diaries. I'd seen her writing them when I was a teenager. So she'd written it from when she was 12 till the year before she died. And she was on it. She really didn't miss a day. And so I decided that I needed to read them as part of writing this.
Andrea Gunning
This wasn't one or two diaries. Her mom had made daily entries for 55 years.
Helen Naylor
So obviously that is a huge amount to read. So it took a while. It took me probably at least a year to read them. And I did have to have breaks because it was quite a lot.
Andrea Gunning
At first glance, these entries were boring.
Helen Naylor
She just writes about the basics, the weather, where's she been, what's she done? There's no real feelings if you read my diaries from when I was a teenager. Gosh, the teenage angst that would seep out of those pages. And yet there's nothing like that in my mum's diaries. She doesn't fancy anyone. She doesn't, like, have any friendship problems. There's no feelings.
Andrea Gunning
Reading the diaries became part of Helen's daily routine. She was slowly reading her way through her mom's life from when she was 12 years old onwards.
Helen Naylor
I read it like I'd read a novel or something. I just always had one with me. They were tiny, so I could just keep them in my handbag and whenever I had five minutes, I just read a few pages.
Andrea Gunning
Over the years, Helen had heard her mom tell the story of her life many times. She knew it well.
Helen Naylor
What I expected to find was exactly what she'd told me. She'd had a really hard childhood with a really difficult sister and difficult parents, and then she'd had a really successful time at work, met my dad, decided to have me, and then from that point, she'd got ill, and that was just completely wrong.
Andrea Gunning
Helen started reading passages in her mom's diary that diverged from the story she'd been told. Then Helen saw the line that stopped her in her tracks.
Helen Naylor
She writes, I have found my illness.
Andrea Gunning
The stories you hear on betrayal. Remind us what happens when trust is broken. This holiday, you can help your child write a different kind of story, one built on trust, freedom, and that first unforgettable ride. Introducing Guardian Bikes the easiest, safest and quickest way for kids to learn to ride. No tiers and no training wheels needed. That's why Guardian is America's favorite kids bike and the New York Times and Wirecutter's top pick three years in a row. And because every frame is crafted right here in America, you're not just giving a gift, you're supporting the people who build it. This holiday season, give a gift that lasts far beyond the wrapping paper. Visit guardianbikes.com to save over 40% on all bikes, plus a free $100 accessory bundle with every order. Guardian Bikes the story of their first ride starts here.
Anna Bay Sofa Advertiser
It starts like any other night. The glass of red, the cozy blanket. Then the drop. The stain so dark, so stubborn it might as well have been a crime scene. But this isn't your average couch. This is annabe. Fully washable, unspeakably comfortable and ready for whatever your life, your kids or your ex throws at it. And here's the kicker. Starting at just 6:99, you can make sure your sofa isn't part of the problem. Fully washable, stain resistant, and built to hide even the darkest defenses. Right now, get up to 60% off with their early access Black Friday sale because no one should have to live with a stain that won't quit. Anna Bay the only mystery you won't be losing sleep over. Shop washablesofas.com today that's washablesofas.com.
Andrea Gunning
Making the.
TJ Maxx Advertiser
Holidays magical for everyone on your list. It's no small feat, but with TJ Maxx, your magic multiplies with quality finds. Arriving daily through Christmas Eve, you'll save on luxe cashmere, the latest tech toys, and more. So you can check off every name on your list and treat yourself to a holiday look that'll turn heads. Now you know where to go to make all that holiday magic. It's T.J. maxx, of course. It's shaping up to be a very magical holiday.
Andrea Gunning
You live for plot twists and never take the boring route. Sound familiar? Then it's time to board a cruise that feels like an adventure novel you can't put down. Virgin Voyages is redefining getaways with all in voyage pricing over $1,000 in value Wi Fi 20 plus dining spots, group fitness and entertainment, the always included luxury you deserve without extra charges. You don't simple, transparent, fair. No hidden charges, just smooth sailing with a side of thrill. Escape to the Caribbean. Think Grand Cayman, Jamaica, Puerto Rico, with seven night cruises that let you dig deeper into every destination. Or plan ahead for 2025, 2026, with new routes to Aruba, St. Lucia, Iceland, and even the British Isles. The twist? It's adult only, so the vibe stays immersive, exciting and all about you. Private beach clubs, themed sailings, onboard parties in luxury cabins built for deep rel. You bring the curiosity they'll supply the unforgettable. Learn more@virgin voyages.com or contact your travel advisor. After her mother died, Helen decided to write a book about what it was like growing up with her as a parent. As part of her writing process, she read through the daily diaries her mom had kept for over 50 years. That's when Helen saw the line that changed everything.
Helen Naylor
She writes, I have found my illness.
Andrea Gunning
Helen read and reread the words to make sure she wasn't imagining it, but there it was, in her mom's handwriting. For the first time, she learned the real story of how her mom got diagnosed with me.
Helen Naylor
She goes on to nag the doctor to diagnose her, and then very quickly, she's into getting the sick, getting mobility, scooters.
Andrea Gunning
The picture came into focus. Her mom had handpicked her illness and then spent years performing it. The diaries revealed an elaborate deception, the tale of a double life that her mother lived, one where she was perfectly healthy.
Helen Naylor
Yeah, one part she's recording how ill she is every day, and yet it doesn't actually match up to what she's doing. So she'll say this was a really bad day and yet she's been apple picking or, you know, this was a really terrible day. I went shopping all day.
Andrea Gunning
It was possible for Helen's mom to fake having me because there was no definitive way to test for it. Diagnoses were primarily based on a patient's own account of their symptoms. And most of the time, people don't lie to doctors. Most people don't choose to be bedridden.
Helen Naylor
At the time, it was almost like you don't have anything else, so it must be this.
Andrea Gunning
For her whole childhood, Helen was consumed with worry watching her mom lay in bed in chronic pain. When Helen went off to school, she was constantly concerned about how her mom would take care of herself. But the diary told a very different story.
Helen Naylor
The things she said to me and to other people about how she needed to rest and plan and do all that, that's just out the window none of it was true. She was going apple picking and she was going on city trips and going shopping. That really hurt. My whole childhood was shaped by the me, what she couldn't do and it wasn't true. She could have just been a totally normal mum.
Andrea Gunning
Helen couldn't believe what she was reading. She felt sick.
Helen Naylor
I was unraveling what had happened and what had happened to me. My story of how I am the child of two disabled parents and have cared for them, that's actually a lie. We could have been living a normal life for years.
Andrea Gunning
Helen's mom lived a lie, but it didn't make sense to Helen. Why would her mom choose this?
Helen Naylor
She had money, she had health, she had friends. She could have had a really good life and yet she chose something so destructive.
Andrea Gunning
Helen scoured her mom's diaries trying to find an answer.
Helen Naylor
It was like she was totally unveiling herself. Her mask sort of slips and she writes about how everyone is special, but I'm really special and just goes into this rant about how special she is and how no one has appreciated how special she is.
Andrea Gunning
Helen started to get an understanding of her mom's inner world.
Helen Naylor
She had been a narcissist from birth. There's always a huge vanity, so she talks about how beautiful she is and how long her legs are, how slender her hands are, in a way I can't even imagine writing about myself.
Andrea Gunning
Helen's mom had always told her that she'd gotten sick after giving birth, birth to her. That before that she had lived a happy, healthy life. But her diaries told a different story. As Helen read, it was like she was being reintroduced to her own mother. Eleanor's pattern of fake illnesses had started when she was a child.
Helen Naylor
What was really striking for me was that from the beginning she was obsessed with illness. In her 20s and we're talking like early 20s, she, she's constantly going to the doctor for things, breast scans, brain scans. Has she broken this? Has she done this? You know, everything. She's being constantly checked for and she doesn't just take what the doctor says. She needs to go to the consultant and have the highest opinion on things. I really didn't expect the obsession to be so early.
Andrea Gunning
Eleanor's view of her own life was at best self centered and at worst delusional. Her entries paint a picture of a world where she is in complete control. Like when she wrote about getting pregnant with Helen.
Helen Naylor
Nothing about wanting a baby, nothing about thinking about a family. As one day she just writes in her diary, decided I was pregnant. So she's some sort of omnipotent God, she's created a pregnancy.
Andrea Gunning
As she read on, Helen came across something else that was incredibly disturbing. Events from her own childhood that she had no memory of. Her mom had abused her growing up and she documented it in her diaries.
Helen Naylor
She drugged me. I was six months old and she feeds me Chinese food washed down with whiskey. When I was a week old, she went shopping and just left me at home. It's neglect, but it's also abuse and I really didn't expect to find that. What was really hard about reading it was that there'd been months of her talking about the weather or going to the supermarket and then suddenly there would be, she's drugged me or she's. She's in some way injured me. It's just so emotionless. She's so cruel. She doesn't try to hide anything which is interesting or make excuses for anything.
Andrea Gunning
One of Helen's earliest memories was falling off a chair and breaking her arm. But as she read through her mom's diaries, she learned that didn't happen the way she remembered it. Her mom talks about having broken Helen's arm herself when Helen was only two.
Helen Naylor
According to the diaries, she did it. I definitely broke my arm. My mum probably caused it and I don't know how.
Andrea Gunning
Helen learned that social services got involved and somehow her mom explained the injury away.
Helen Naylor
Reading that when I had small children and I've got a very recently two year old, I can see how small her arm is and I can see how easy that would be to break as an adult.
Andrea Gunning
Helen's mind turned to her father. He had been there and witnessed a lot of the abuse, so in many ways he was complicit. But it seems like Eleanor had a lot of power over him too.
Helen Naylor
I can make excuses for him. I can say that he was a man of a different era who relied on the fact that his wife was the mother and that she would know everything and do the right thing. I can say that he was isolated and that I suspect she said she'd leave him and take me with her. Does that excuse it all? No. Do I think he had a really awful life? Yeah. So it's just like holding all of those things at the same time.
Andrea Gunning
Growing up, Helen had carried immense guilt for ruining her mom's life. She knew her mom had gotten sick after she was born and she felt like everything was her fault. But now Helen revised the story of her life. Her mom had gone down a dark path long before she was born and none of it was her fault.
Helen Naylor
It was really like, oh, gosh, this hasn't been the story that I thought it was going to be. I really believed I'd ruined her life, that she'd had me and I had broken everything, that if I hadn't existed, she would have had a happy life. And that's not what I read at all. This was always going to happen. It didn't matter whether I was there or not.
Andrea Gunning
Every neatly penciled, diligently dated diary entry was like a puzzle piece. At first, it was a scrambled and confusing mess. But slowly, pieces started to click into place. Helen saw that everything the narcissism, the faked illness was all connected. Her mom was not sick with me or Parkinson's. She was mentally ill with a condition called Munchausen syndrome. People with Munchausen's fake or exaggerate medical conditions as a means of gaining control, sympathy or power.
Helen Naylor
What I realized was that for women with narcissistic personality disorder, it often doesn't look like masculine narcissism. It often looks like victimhood. It's about getting attention and about being the poor little woman. Munchausen's is kind of perfect for that, because who questions an ill person and says, I think you're making it up? Who would do that? Without the diaries, I think I would still be in the dark. I don't think I would have properly been able to put all the pieces together. There's lots of events that I see.
Andrea Gunning
Differently now, like the trip to America where her parents seemed miraculously cured. Her mom could choose when she felt well based on what was convenient for her, and her dad hadn't actually been doing as well as her mom told her.
Helen Naylor
My mum said to me, dad is better in the heat. And yet at the same time, I remember him gasping for air because it was so hot and he couldn't breathe. And I didn't realise that those two things were opposites until I wrote my book and my agent said to me, which one was it? And I was like, oh, my God. Goodness. I've held this for 30 years and never put it together. My dad wasn't better there, but she told me that he was, so I believed her. It seems incredible. I don't think you can underestimate the power that a parent has over a child. I was talking to my daughter about a cushion downstairs once and I said to her, the gray one, you know the gray one? She was like, you mean the blue one? I was like, no, the gray one. The gray one. She was like, oh, okay. And she said she was trying to convince herself that this blue cushion was gray because I'd said that it was gray. And when I got downstairs, I was like, oh, it's not gray, it's blue. Sorry, I got that wrong. But the power the we have as adults over children to say that this is this, that even when you're looking at something, you're like, my mum must be right, so I must be seeing this wrong. If you need to accept the lie to live, then you accept the lie, right?
Andrea Gunning
Slowly, Helen began writing the book about her mom.
Helen Naylor
It took me quite a few attempts to write it because I didn't really know how to put it all together. She wasn't a cartoon villain.
Andrea Gunning
Helen pulled together all the strands of truth and fiction that had shaped her world growing up. Her mom's version of events, her own memories, and the diaries. She published her book, which is titled My Mother Munchausens and Me.
Helen Naylor
I thought I was going to be the only person in the whole world who had been through this. That turned out to be completely wrong. I have had probably a hundred people contact me from all over the world. Some people have told me that I've explained their life to them. And, you know, I've had people saying, I'm 60, and I've just realized what's happened.
Andrea Gunning
Helen realized she had concrete answers that many people in her situation never get.
Helen Naylor
I've got the diaries, and I've got so much proof in a way that a lot of people don't. I think I'm quite unusual in that a lot of people who've been through something like this unsurprisingly, go down some really dark roads with their mental health and with ways of coping with that. And for some reason, I've got through this and been able to write about it, which is quite unusual, but is amazing because I can hopefully verbalize, for people who can't say it, what's happened.
Andrea Gunning
Helen will never be able to get those years of her childhood back.
Helen Naylor
It's a huge betrayal. So much of. Of my life was sacrificed to what she needed, which was actually what she wanted. So much of who I am had to be hidden. It's taken me until the last five years to start to get back to who I am. What do I like? What do I want to do? Believing that my opinion matters and that I matter enough to be looked after.
Andrea Gunning
Helen says her relationship with her husband has been healing.
Helen Naylor
Luckily for me, I picked the right guy. He's a wonderful, faithful, fabulous person, which is very janny it's taken me a time, long, long time to believe that he loves me because I just didn't think I was lovable. It's taken me a really long time to accept that he wasn't tricked, that he did want this, and that we both make each other much happier than we'd be without each other.
Andrea Gunning
Eleanor went to extreme lengths to control and abuse her daughter to keep Helen's world small and make sure it would always revolve around her. But she underestimated her daughter's resilience.
Helen Naylor
I do think in a way my mum neglecting me was a real downfall because it meant I became so self sufficient. It just absolutely defeated everything she wanted me to be. I was supposed to fail at a thing, but I'd learned to look after myself.
Andrea Gunning
Today, Helen has built the life she always dreamed of. She, Peter and their kids live together in Nottingham where Peter and Helen met and fell in love. They go on weekend trips with their kids, play the TV loudly and treasure every day they spend together. We end every weekly episode with the same question. Why do you want to share your story?
Helen Naylor
A really big thing for me to say was that mothers aren't necessarily good. There's this feeling that mums are good no matter what. Mums are good. Even if they do the wrong thing, it's because they love you so much. I'd had so many people saying to me, this can't be true, she's your mum. As if being a mum and being a bad person don't go together. And I really wanted to challenge that.
Andrea Gunning
On the next episode of Betrayal Weekly, I came up with my plan, which was I'm gonna buy a gun.
Helen Naylor
That's my way out.
Andrea Gunning
Walking into this gun store thinking that.
Helen Naylor
I cannot believe this is my life.
Andrea Gunning
I can't believe this is my life. I was floored. I had never felt so helpless in my life. If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal Team or want to tell us your Betrayal story, email us@betrayalpodmail.com that's betrayalpodmail. Or follow us on Instagram betrayalpod. You can also connect with me on InstagramdreaGunning to access our newsletter, View additional content and connect with the Betrayal Community. Join our substack@betrayal.substack.com we're grateful for your support. One way to show support is by subscribing to our show on Apple Podcasts. And don't forget to rate and review Betrayal. Five star reviews go a long way. A big thank you to all of our listeners. Betrayal is a production of Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment Group, in partnership with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive produced by Nancy Glass and Jennifer Faison, hosted and produced by me, Andrea Gunning. This episode was written and produced by Olivia Hewitt and Monique Laborde with additional production from Ben Federman. Casting support from Curry Richmond. Our iHeart team is Ally Perry and Jessica Krynczyk. Audio editing and mixing by Matt D' Alvecchio additional audio editing by Tanner Robbins betrayal's theme composed by Oliver Baines music library provided by MIB Music and for more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartradio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. ABC Wednesday it's the CMA Awards Live.
Helen Naylor
That's what I'm talking about.
Andrea Gunning
With performances by Lamy Wilson, Kelsey Ballerini, Zach Topp, Riley Green, Ella Langley, Kenny Chesney, Megan Maroney, Brandi Carlisle and the hottest collabs, Miranda Lambert and Chris Stapleton, Jabuzzi and Steven Wilson Jr. Big Extra.
Helen Naylor
Plug featuring Liv Cohen.
Andrea Gunning
It's country music's biggest night hosted by your girl Lainey Wilson. The CMA awards live Wednesday 8, 7 Central on ABC and next day on Hulu. Did a GLP1 help you lose weight, but now you're noticing unwanted facial changes. The weight came off, but facial volume loss and dull sagging skin are making you look older. That's where the next phase of your weight loss journey comes in. There's before weight loss, after weight loss and the after After Help restore and refresh your facial skin and reclaim your natural looking youthful glow. To learn more, visit face after weight loss.com that's face after weight loss.com this is Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang from Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. JBL Tour Pro 3 earbuds are for those who don't conform to the standard. Yeah, I mean if you want to get into some touchscreen technology, how about the smart charging case Clear sound? These are not standard things. You to get them with the JBL Tour Pro 3 baby. And I love the sound of JBL when it goes. These earbuds are packed with innovation because you can't stand out by following others Touchscreen Smart charging case for one touch control, instant EQ customization, true adaptive noise canceling and the one of a kind audio transmitter which can plug and play with everything from game consoles to in flight entertainment. What more could you want first doesn't follow. Grab a pair@jbl.com you know what a.
Helen Naylor
Girl'S best friend is not diamonds.
Andrea Gunning
Her lawyers. From executive producer Ryan Murphy comes a fiery new legal drama. It's our own boutique women representing women you can't afford to miss.
Anna Bay Sofa Advertiser
Make it rig showtime, ladies.
Helen Naylor
Stand up straight and breeze into that.
Andrea Gunning
Room like a storm no one saw coming. Hulu Original Series All Stars Fair. Now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney plus for bundle subscribers terms apply.
TJ Maxx Advertiser
This is an iHeart podcast.
Host: Andrea Gunning
Guest: Helen Naylor
Release Date: November 13, 2025
In this compelling episode of Betrayal Weekly, host Andrea Gunning sits down with Helen Naylor to share the astonishing story of Helen's childhood, defined by her mother's chronic illness—a story that, after decades, Helen would discover to be a devastating deception. Through exploring Helen’s life in a small English town, her parents’ illnesses, the loss of her father, and eventually her mother’s death, the episode reveals the unraveling of a web of lies that shaped Helen’s identity. This is a story of shattered trust, psychological manipulation, confronting harsh truths, and finding resilience and self-worth in the aftermath.
Helen Naylor’s story is a raw, intimate glimpse into the lifelong effects of parental deception and emotional manipulation. Through the discovery of her mother’s carefully constructed illness—and the diaries that recorded it all—Helen unearths both the truth and her own resilience. Her candid account highlights the destructive power of hidden mental illness and the generational impact of family secrets, while offering hope to others living in the shadow of betrayal.