Betrayal: Weekly – Episode 10: Torrah
Introduction
In Episode 10 of Betrayal: Weekly, hosted by Andrea Gunning, we delve into the heartrending story of Torah Giles and her tumultuous relationship with Aaron, a man who seemed to embody strength and resilience but ultimately revealed a web of deceit and hidden secrets. This episode explores themes of trust, betrayal, and the arduous journey toward healing after uncovering profound personal deceptions.
Torah's Background
Torah Giles, a history professor in Colorado, presents a life rooted in strong community and faith. Growing up on a farm in California as one of seven siblings, Torah was deeply entrenched in the Seventh-Day Adventist Church, which shaped her expectations for a traditional life path—graduate high school, marry, and start a family.
Torah Giles [02:28]: "We grew up on a farm. So my life was kind of wild and crazy and great. Grew up super religious in the Seventh Day Adventist Church."
Despite her strong religious upbringing, Torah found herself deviating from the expected path. After high school, she became a full-time nanny and eventually pursued higher education in history, leading her to Colorado for her PhD.
Torah Giles [07:24]: "I was living in this really cute tiny apartment in the older section of Colorado Springs. So cute. And just loving my life."
Meeting Aaron
In January 2017, Torah began teaching a class on conspiracy culture and elections in U.S. political history. It was here that she met Aaron, a fellow mid-30s student with a commanding presence and a service dog named Osa.
Torah Giles [05:05]: "He had a service dog, this really cute English mastiff named Osa...He was finishing his Bachelor's degree, on his way to start nursing school."
Aaron's background as a former army medic who lost his foot in Iraq added layers to his persona, making him both admirable and relatable. Their interactions grew from casual chats to a deeper connection, with Aaron often seeking Torah's help with childcare due to his impending custody of his son amidst a tumultuous divorce.
Torah Giles [09:32]: "He might need some help with my son."
Building the Relationship
Over the next few months, Aaron and Torah developed a strong bond, blending friendship and familial support. Torah became integral to Aaron's life, helping him manage his son while Aaron pursued his nursing career.
Torah Giles [12:17]: "He was just Aaron, and that made her feel comfortable...We had a beer, sat on the back patio, and he told me a little bit more about what was going on."
Their relationship deepened, leading Torah to move into Aaron's home and live as common-law spouses. Despite financial strains, their life together appeared harmonious, anchored by love for Aaron's son.
Aaron's Decline and Death
The stability of their life was shattered when Aaron fell seriously ill. Initially thought to be an infection from his amputation, Aaron's condition rapidly worsened, leading to chronic pain and dependency on pain medications like oxycodone and fentanyl.
Torah Giles [28:07]: "He was taking oxycodone, I believe Percocet...He had a patch on his shoulder. I said, what's that? He said, oh, it's fentanyl...And he kind of pooh poohed me like, I know what I'm doing."
Despite Torah's efforts to care for him, Aaron's health deteriorated, culminating in his untimely death due to an overdose. Torah’s grief was compounded by the sudden appearance of Aaron’s estranged family, who challenged the narrative Torah believed about Aaron's heritage and past.
Torah Giles [31:13]: "I reached down and I picked him up and I held him really close and I said, never forget I love you and I'm your amma and that will never change."
Discovering the Betrayal
Torah's quest for closure led her to uncover shocking truths about Aaron after his death. She discovered that Aaron's military records did not align with his embellished stories, revealing that he had fabricated significant aspects of his identity, including his Native American Choctaw heritage and his status as a Special Forces medic.
Torah Giles [35:03]: "When I got his autopsy, it was very much an overdose. He had on double the dose and he had taken double the dose of oxycodone at the same time to go to bed."
Further investigation exposed Aaron's infidelities and deceptive relationships with multiple women, undermining the trust Torah had placed in him. The most devastating revelation was Aaron's false assertion that no one had ever loved him except Torah, highlighting the depth of his deceit.
Torah Giles [37:07]: "Nobody has ever loved me. Nobody, except for you. And that is the biggest lie he ever told."
Torah's Healing Process
The unraveling of Aaron's true identity plunged Torah into deep despair, yet it also set her on a path toward healing. Through therapy and introspection, Torah began to confront the complexities of Aaron's behavior, recognizing patterns of manipulation and addiction that contributed to his fraudulent life.
Torah Giles [49:00]: "He was broken. He was broken by a world that breaks people and spits them out...Instead of becoming someone who would be loved, he became someone who he thought was lovable."
Torah emphasizes the importance of validating one's own experiences, despite the betrayal, and finding empathy for both herself and Aaron to reconcile her past.
Torah Giles [49:50]: "My story was true and my experiences were valid. My story was true, even if his wasn't."
Conclusion
Four years after Aaron's death, Torah Giles continues to teach history in Colorado, forever changed by her experiences. Her journey underscores the profound impact of betrayal and the resilience required to rebuild one's life after uncovering deep personal deceptions. Through her story, Torah advocates for understanding and supporting those who have been betrayed, emphasizing that healing is possible even in the aftermath of profound loss.
Torah Giles [48:47]: "Closure isn't necessary for you to move on and heal. It's really not help, but it's not necessary."
Notable Quotes
- Torah Giles [02:28]: "We grew up on a farm...Grew up super religious in the Seventh Day Adventist Church."
- Torah Giles [07:24]: "I was living in this really cute tiny apartment...And just loving my life."
- Torah Giles [05:05]: "He was finishing his Bachelor's degree, on his way to start nursing school."
- Torah Giles [37:07]: "Nobody has ever loved me. Nobody, except for you. And that is the biggest lie he ever told."
- Torah Giles [48:47]: "Closure isn't necessary for you to move on and heal."
Final Thoughts
Torah Giles’ story is a compelling testament to the hidden depths of human relationships and the devastating consequences of deceit. Betrayal: Weekly presents her narrative with sensitivity and depth, encouraging listeners to reflect on the complexities of trust and the journey toward personal healing after experiencing profound betrayal.