Revisionist History | Karoline's Story

Summary

Betrayal: Season 4 - Episode 3: "Revisionist History"

Overview

"Revisionist History," the third episode of Season 4 of Betrayal, delves deep into the harrowing story of Karoline Borega (referred to as Caroline) and her husband, Joel Kern—a respected Colorado Springs Police Officer. This episode unravels the intricate web of deceit Joel spun over two decades, examining how his duplicity not only shattered his marriage but also his public persona. Through poignant narratives and compelling evidence, the episode paints a vivid picture of betrayal, resilience, and the quest for truth.

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1. The Day That Changed Everything [00:00 - 06:00]

The episode opens by setting the stage for a pivotal moment in Caroline and Joel's marriage—April 11, 2022. This day marks the revelation of Joel's infidelity, not just as a marital betrayal but as a profound violation of his duty as a police officer.

Joel's Admission:
[06:00] "I'm at the second accident scene. I'll be home in a little bit."

Caroline initially perceives this confession as an isolated incident, believing Joel is overwhelmed by his responsibilities.

---

2. Early Signs of Deception [06:00 - 14:00]

Caroline reflects on the early signs of Joel's unfaithfulness. Six months post-wedding, Caroline discovers incriminating emails between Joel and a woman who played a significant role in their wedding ceremony.

Caroline's Realization:
[07:25] "Just months after our wedding, Joel was having an online sexual conversation with a woman who was part of our ceremony."

Despite confronting Joel and seeking counseling, Caroline chooses to forgive him, mistakenly believing their bond would overcome this transgression.

---

3. The Birth of Doubts [14:00 - 25:00]

The birth of their first child becomes a turning point. Joel's absence during the delivery raises red flags, as he claims exhaustion from work. This incident sows seeds of doubt in Caroline's mind about Joel's true character.

Caroline's Concern:
[12:22] "I saw him speeding to our house. He's not at another accident. He's not at the hospital. He's coming from somewhere."

Joel's explanation fails to convince Caroline, leading her to suspect his involvement in activities beyond what he admits.

---

4. The Rental Property Scandal [25:00 - 37:00]

Joel's management of a rental property becomes the epicenter of further deceit. Accusations surface that Joel was involved romantically with the tenant, which he initially denies, manipulating perceptions to maintain his facade.

Confrontation with the Tenant:
[21:20] "What is going on?"

Upon investigation, it becomes evident that Joel had been using the property for illicit affairs, expertly orchestrating scenarios to evade suspicion.

---

5. The Unraveling Double Life [37:00 - 47:00]

As Caroline digs deeper, she uncovers multiple affairs Joel engaged in, both within and outside his professional sphere. Internal Affairs gets involved, and testimonies from Joel's colleagues paint a grim picture of his manipulative nature.

Colleague's Insight:
[36:54] "Maybe he had to get permission to just do anything with anyone else from her before he could do that."

Joel's meticulous control over narratives ensures that his double life remains hidden for years, leaving Caroline grappling with shattered trust.

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6. The Climactic Revelation [47:00 - 50:00]

The episode builds up to the climax where Joel's web of lies begins to crumble. A critical incident involving Joel's police car raises suspicions, leading Caroline to confront him with undeniable evidence of his deceit.

Joel's Admission:
[28:40] "I met someone on the Internet and we arranged to meet at an exit close to the Air Force Academy."

This confession marks the end of Caroline's illusion of a perfect family, propelling her towards seeking justice and healing.

---

7. Reflections and Aftermath [50:00 - End]

In the aftermath of Joel's betrayals, Caroline reflects on the erosion of her memories and the profound impact on her perception of reality. The episode emphasizes the lasting scars left by such deep-seated deceit.

Caroline's Reflection:
[46:47] "They destroyed my memory of my entire adult life. Even the best memories... are tainted forever."

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Caroline on Discovering the First Affair:
  [07:25] "Just months after our wedding, Joel was having an online sexual conversation with a woman who was part of our ceremony."

• Joel's Repeated Lies about Accidents:
  [25:35] "He was having sex with her at their offices, at the police department in various areas of town or in his police car."

• Caroline Confronting Joel:
  [28:09] "How would that happen then?"

• Joel's Calm Demeanor Amidst Lies:
  [28:20] "That must be a cell phone tower pinging wrong."

• Caroline on the Betrayal's Impact:
  [46:47] "They destroyed my memory of my entire adult life. Even the best memories... are tainted forever."

---

Conclusion

"Revisionist History" masterfully unpacks the layers of Joel Kern's duplicity, showcasing how one individual's deceit can devastate a family's foundation. Through Caroline's journey, listeners witness the painful unraveling of trust and the arduous path to reclaiming one's life after such profound betrayal. This episode serves as a poignant reminder of the complexities of human relationships and the resilience required to overcome betrayal.

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Additional Information

For those interested in exploring the full breadth of Caroline and Joel's story, be sure to listen to Seasons 1-3 of Betrayal as well as Betrayal Weekly Season 1. Exclusive content, curated book recommendations, and community discussions are available by joining the Beyond Betrayal Substack for free.

Transcript

[Andrea Gunning]

This is an iHeart podcast. It's April 2020. A woman announces on Facebook that she has Covid and won't be seeking medical attention.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I didn't want to be talked out of this plan.

[Andrea Gunning]

Then she disappears. Anyone else think this is strange?

[Courtney Armstrong]

I just had to know. How did this happen?

[Andrea Gunning]

Listen to what happened to Talina zar on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Are you obsessed with true crime?

[Courtney Armstrong]

Then you're gonna love True Crime Tonight.

[Andrea Gunning]

I'm Bonnie Moving.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I'm Courtney Armstrong.

[Andrea Gunning]

And I'm Stephanie Lydecker. We've all worked together for years and now we're trying something brand new. We're unpacking all the latest true crime headlines. We'll be covering all the major trials that are heating up this summer. And yes, we'll also be covering scandals that were all up obsessed with.

[Courtney Armstrong]

He pulls out of his backpack, syringes.

[Andrea Gunning]

What? Wow. Completely bizarre. Listen to True Crime Tonight on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. You can get True Crime Tonight completely ad free. That's with an I Heart True Crime plus subscription available exclusively on Apple Podcasts. So open your Apple podcast app, search for I Heart True Crime plus and subscribe today.

[Courtney Armstrong]

How could a beautiful young first grade teacher be stabbed 20 times, including in the back, allegedly die of suicide? Yes, that was the medical examiner's official ruling after a closed door meeting. He first named it a homicide. Why? What happened to Ellen Greenberg? A huge American miscarriage of justice. For an in depth look at the facts, see what happened to Ellen on Amazon. All proceeds to the national center for Missing and Exploited Children.

[Andrea Gunning]

Hi guys, I'm Andrea Gunning, host of Betrayal. I'm excited to bring you all season four, a story of a cop and his double life. I'm also excited to tell you that you can now get access to all episodes of betrayal season 1, 2, 3 and betrayal weekly and every single episode of Betrayal season four ad free and one week early through the IHAR True Crime plus subscription available exclusively on Apple Podcasts plus you'll get access to other chart topping true crime shows you love like the Real Killer, the Girlfriends, American Homicide, Theron Gone South Street, Burden of Guilt, Murder on Songbird Road, the Idaho Massacre, Paper Ghosts and more. So don't wait, head to Apple Podcasts, search for I Heart True Crime plus and subscribe today. Hey guys, before we get into the episode, a quick note. We're looking for new stories of betrayal for our weekly Betrayal series, which returns in August. If you've experienced betrayal and feel ready to share your story, now is a great time to reach out. Email [e-mail] that's [e-mail].

[Courtney Armstrong]

I woke up just kind of feeling this heaviness on my chest, like it was difficult to take a deep breath in. And my eyes were burning and I can smell the exhaust and I heard this rumbling sound. Where is that coming from? Is that his truck? Is that his truck rumbling?

[Andrea Gunning]

FOREIGN I'm Andrea Gunning, and this is betrayal. Season 4 Episode 3 Revisionist History April 11, 2022, was Caroline's D day, the day that split her life in two. It was the day her husband, Joel Kern, told her that he had received oral sex in his police vehicle while on duty. It was also the day he was placed on leave pending termination, threatening the job their family had sacrificed so much for. For Caroline, this wasn't just about infidelity. It was about 20 years of lies. A picture perfect family that never truly was. To fully understand the impact of Joel's betrayal, we need to go back in time to a few key moments in Caroline and Joel's marriage. There were two realities happening, and we're going to show you the split screen. On one side, what Caroline experienced in the moment, and on the other, what Joel was really doing behind the scenes. Let's start with the life Caroline thought she had with Joel. Before April 11, 2022.

[Courtney Armstrong]

We had, in my opinion, what would be a fairy tale family for a law enforcement family. We made the best of everything. We were traveling together and we had these kids who were just rock stars. We were talking about what it was going to look like to retire and not have a care in the world for day to day life. We had this dream together. We were not perfect, but we damn sure lived a beautiful and blessed life before that day.

[Andrea Gunning]

But after April 11th, I was lost.

[Courtney Armstrong]

To say I was numb is an understatement. Like, I have been with this person for more than half my life. He is all I have known. It just was this feeling of, what the hell am I going to do?

[Andrea Gunning]

In the days after D day, Joel made a series of confessions. Every time he spoke with Caroline, he revealed new details about what he had done. And Caroline began to replay the tape of her own life with Joel. That process brought up old memories. Moments that had been buried deep in her mind now took on new meaning.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Foreign.

[Andrea Gunning]

Let'S start back in 2001. Caroline was 25 years old when she and Joel got married. And in Episode one. We shared that Joel's childhood friend read this passage at their wedding. Love is patient and kind. Love does not envy or boast.

[Courtney Armstrong]

He invited a childhood friend to do a reading and she was excited to be part of the ceremony.

[Andrea Gunning]

And only six months after the wedding, something happened. It was 2001 and email communication was still new for some people. Caroline's aunt was using email for the first time, so Caroline decided to send her a message.

[Courtney Armstrong]

As I logged on, I couldn't get in to my email account. I noticed though that Joel's was already up, and so I thought, oh, she'll get a kick out of this even more because she'll think it's coming from Joel as well as myself.

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline sent the email, but then she saw the preview lines to other emails Joel had recently received.

[Courtney Armstrong]

And I noticed the friend who did the reading. In our wedding, there were several email correspondences with her, and the preview lines.

[Andrea Gunning]

Made Caroline look twice.

[Courtney Armstrong]

And so I clicked and started reading through them. And there was email after email exchange between the pair discussing what it would have been like had they married each other or if they ever had a opportunity for a romantic interlude. And they got pretty graphic.

[Andrea Gunning]

Just months after their wedding, Joel was having an online sexual conversation with a woman who was part of their ceremony. A woman who had read the words, love does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Rejoices with the truth.

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline was stunned. She left a note next to the computer letting Joel know that she had seen the emails. Then she fled to her parents house. Eventually she returned home to confront him.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I pull into the garage, open the door, walk through the house, and he's on his knees waiting for me, and he's crying and crying and over and over just assured me that it was just merely for attention and that, you know, look, I'll do anything. And then he said, you know, I'll go to counseling to assure you that I'll never let this happen again. And so I said, yeah, because at this point there's no trust.

[Andrea Gunning]

Joel said he was committed to showing Caroline that he was serious. And they found a marriage counselor. During counseling, Joel attributed his behavior to job stress and residual grief from his father's death three years prior. Joel said and did all the right things. He apologized with tears streaming down his face. He promised it would never happen again, and Caroline believed him. After all, it was only a few emails.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I convinced myself there was no physical cheating. And so we were able to work through this early on when he did this, I thought naively that this was going to make us stronger.

[Andrea Gunning]

After D day, Caroline returned to this memory, and she realized this was the first time she chose to see the best in Joel. Once Caroline forgave Joel, their love appeared to grow stronger, just like she'd hoped. And a couple years later, Caroline became pregnant with their first child. In the final doctor's appointment, before she was due to give birth, Joel didn't show up. He said he had an important work lunch. But at that appointment, Caroline's doctor recommended she be induced right away. So she called Joel, begging him to meet her at the hospital. When he got there, he seemed off.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Joel had been complaining. He was super tired. And it's hard to, like, confess and admit this now, and very few people know this, but when it came time to push, the doctor came in and sat me up and said, you know, here's what we're going to do, and started explaining things. And Joel raised his finger and said, can you guys just all hold on for a minute so that I can use the bathroom? And everyone just got real quiet. And the doctor said, why don't you go ahead and take care of yourself, and we'll stay with your wife? And the nurse who was in the room, she asked if I was okay and safe at home. It was humiliating. After our son was born, he said that he was just incredibly tired, that he had gotten no sleep because of work, and said that he was going to go home and get sleep. Meanwhile, I was alone at the hospital with our newborn son.

[Andrea Gunning]

This is one of the most difficult memories for Caroline to revisit the very first day of her son's life. Joel was MIA Starting bright and early in the morning.

[Courtney Armstrong]

His colleagues and his co workers were coming in to congratulate us, and Joel wasn't there. And so I called him and said, all of your co workers are coming in, and people are asking where you're at. Are you going to come to the hospital, see the baby? And I. And so he said, I just really needed a night to catch up on sleep.

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline assumed Joel really was exhausted. Maybe he was overwhelmed by the reality of becoming a father. But now she's forced to look back and ask herself, did he leave that.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Night after I had our son to go be with someone or do something, I don't know. I would hope not. I hope that he went home just to get some sleep. But it's something now that I've replayed.

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline knew what she was getting into when she married a cop. Her eyes were wide open. There would be times when Joel would have to prioritize work and she would be the one to pull the weight. But when it came to big moments like the birth of their child, she thought surely the family would come first and if anything ever happened to their children, she expected Joel to be by her side. We're going to fast forward to January of 2019 when their daughter Nicole was admitted to the hospital. She was 13.

[Courtney Armstrong]

She had a very severe bacterial infection that grew concerned for her being septic. And so she was admitted to a children's hospital for about a week. That was one of the first times I ever saw my mom cry. I just was not doing well. I was weak and lost £20 in a week.

[Andrea Gunning]

The timing couldn't have been worse for Joel. He'd just been nominated for the permanent public information officer position.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Joel was insistent that he couldn't take any time off of work to come stay with her because it would be a bad look. I wanted him around, but I just constantly had this notion in my head that my dad couldn't sacrifice work. Like he had to be there. And so I don't think it was even really a choice in my head that he could be there.

[Andrea Gunning]

They were used to Joel putting work first. He couldn't be there to support Caroline or care for his daughter. It was disappointing, but not surprising.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I now know why he really wasn't there. I found very clear evidence later that he had made arrangements to meet someone for sex.

[Andrea Gunning]

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[Courtney Armstrong]

I made the decision at the onset that if it got bad enough I would not go to the hospital.

[Andrea Gunning]

Pretty quickly a ragtag group of women on the Internet start their own investigation.

[Courtney Armstrong]

It felt like I was living out one of like my fantasy dreams of being a detective.

[Andrea Gunning]

But the world they uncover is beyond their wildest imagination.

[Courtney Armstrong]

How did this happen?

[Andrea Gunning]

Listen to what happened to Talina zar on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.

[Courtney Armstrong]

How could a beautiful young first grade teacher be stabbed 20 times, including in the back, allegedly die of suicide? Yes, that was the medical examiner's official ruling. After a closed door meeting, he first named it a homicide. Why? What happened to Ellen Greenberg? A huge American miscarriage of justice. For an in depth look at the facts, see what happened to Ellen on Amazon. All proceeds to the national center for Missing and Exploited Children.

[Andrea Gunning]

When Caroline first told her mom she met the man she was going to marry, her mom said, Jesus Christ, he better not be a cop. But over the course of their marriage, he became incredibly close with Caroline's family. So close that when her mother passed away, he served as the executor of her estate. Among the assets passed down to Caroline was a rental property she didn't want to keep. However, Joel convinced her that it would be wise to hold onto would provide passive income. He promised to manage it for her, and he did. He found the renters and handled all the communication with them. But unbeknownst to Caroline, he was using that property for another reason we're going to go to April 2020. When Caroline looks back on this day, she sees it as Joel's closest call. A near miss. A day that could have been her D day. But it wasn't. Because on this day, Joel was able to stay in control. Here's their son's memory of what happened.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I was still in high school. I had to be sophomore, junior year. I get home from school and usually my mom will greet me or say something when I get home, but I didn't hear anything. And so I go up to the office and I see my mom just in tears and she's beside herself. And she showed me, she said, look at what this person just messaged me on Facebook.

[Andrea Gunning]

The message claimed that Joel was sleeping with the tenant that was living in their rental property.

[Courtney Armstrong]

And then my dad gets home and he's confronted with it by my mom. And he denies it. And I remember confronting him and I told him, I said, if this is true, like we're done. I'm never fucking talking to you again.

[Andrea Gunning]

Joel told Caroline somebody was messing with them. Who and why, he didn't know. But here's the thing about Joel. He didn't get anxious or crazy. He was calm. Caroline insisted on going to the rental property with Joel to get to the bottom of it. Not knowing what to expect, Caroline taped the encounter. Hi.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Hello.

[Andrea Gunning]

What is going on?

[Courtney Armstrong]

Well, you tell me.

[Andrea Gunning]

The tenant blamed her ex boyfriend, saying he was looking for revenge after their breakup. She strongly denied there was any relationship between her and Joel. Get to me to hurt me, I have no idea. Because the thing is, I was trying to break up with him. We were having our kind of arguments.

[Courtney Armstrong]

And then he was trying to be nice and nice.

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline was furious with the situation. How did her family get mixed up in the Renner's drama? And how did the Renner's ex boyfriend even know who Joel was?

[Courtney Armstrong]

So you said something, you said something to make some psychopath think this about my husband.

[Andrea Gunning]

And here's Joel defending himself in the moment.

[Courtney Armstrong]

This psychopath has got me on the road to a divorce. My kids want me out of the house.

[Andrea Gunning]

Remember, this was the before times. Caroline and the kids believed Joel had nothing to do with the tenant.

[Courtney Armstrong]

He proved his his innocence, seemingly to us.

[Andrea Gunning]

Joel was able to keep his family together and put this mix up behind them. That didn't change how their son felt when he first heard about the accusation.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I mean, I was an asshole to him after this. And I remember we were in the car together, driving and this was a very Memorable moment for me because it kind of takes gall to admit when you're wrong or are seemingly wrong.

[Andrea Gunning]

Initially, their son didn't believe Joel. In fact, he came at Joel pretty hard. But after the renter cleared it up, he felt guilty for attacking his father, and he humbled himself.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I was in the passenger seat, and it was just us in the car. And I apologized to him for how I treated him. And he accepted my apology and said, thank you for saying that. But, you know, come to find out, all of it was true.

[Andrea Gunning]

On the day Caroline and her kids confronted Joel in the rv, he admitted that he had, in fact, been having sex with the Renner.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Where were you at when you had sex? At the house. Where in the house? In the basement. So you go down to that dirty, filthy basement and then had sex. Unprotected sex.

[Andrea Gunning]

The entire scene at the rental property was pure theater. Joel and the tenant played their parts well.

[Courtney Armstrong]

We asked you, did you do this? Did you do this? You said no.

[Andrea Gunning]

Nicole couldn't believe it.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Joel admitted that he contacted and told her, she better not say anything to me.

[Andrea Gunning]

So when Caroline went to the rental property to investigate, Joel had already told the tenant to keep her mouth shut. Joel had sex on numerous occasions with the renter, but stood by while she took all the heat, and he played the victim. It's a stark example of the split screen reality. The family has Joel on tape, at first playing the victim, and then years later confessing in a cold, flat tone. Caroline has lived through this dichotomy many times. After D day, Joel admitted to lies that were so disturbing, they weren't just a betrayal of his marriage vows. They were a betrayal of his oath as an officer. In episode one, we mentioned the George Floyd protests of 2020. Joel told Caroline he was on the front lines. As tensions escalated, People were throwing frozen.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Water bottles or rocks, and he would say, oh, look. Look at this bruise that popped up. This was from a frozen water bottle. Years later, he confessed to me that all of the bruises that I was massaging or rubbing Icy Hot on were not a result of the riots at all. He admitted to me that he had been having an affair during those hours with a co worker, and he was having sex with her at their offices, at the police department in various areas of town or in his police car, and the marks and bruising were a result of his escapades.

[Andrea Gunning]

He accepted her sympathy and care, all the while knowing that he actually got the bruises from having rough sex with a co worker. We're going to come back to this co worker. But before we do, there's one more example of Joel using work as a cover of how low Joel was willing to go to avoid the truth.

[Courtney Armstrong]

January of 2022, he had a moment where he was called out to an accident in the middle of the night. And he said it was a fatal accident and that he would be out for a little bit. This wasn't uncommon.

[Andrea Gunning]

Part of Joel's job duties entailed supervising the major accident unit. This required him to go out to the scene of fatal accidents and oversee the investigation. He was called at all hours, day or night.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I was awake because he needed to get up to get ready to go out. He said goodbye to me, gave me a kiss goodbye, and I said, you know, be safe. I'll see you when you get home.

[Andrea Gunning]

Like many families, they shared an app called Life360, which helped them keep track of each other's locations.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Well, I couldn't go back to bed. I couldn't fall asleep. And so I'm sitting there kind of scrolling through social media, and then I see from one of the news sites that the accident that he was called out to had actually been cleaned up an hour, hour and a half before that. It was already moved and done. So I looked at our life 360, and I saw him in just kind of this random location not too far from our home. I texted him and I said, hey, where are you at? He didn't text back. And so I thought that's strange because even if he was at some type of accident or call for service, almost always within minutes, he would text back or, you know, do an auto reply from his watch or something and say, can't talk right now. But I didn't get anything. So then I got a little concerned and I called him. He put me to voicemail immediately, and so I waited for a little bit, and then I texted him again and I said, hey, I'm a little worried about you. And then he texted me back and said, I'm at a second accident scene. I'm headed to the hospital right now to help. I'll be home in a little bit. And so as he's saying this, I'm literally watching the phone where I can see him speeding to our house. He's not at another accident. He's not at the hospital. He's coming from somewhere. And so when he got home, I said, are you lying to me? And he's like, what are you talking about?

[Andrea Gunning]

His location on the app didn't match what he told her. He was saying one thing and she was seeing another. Joel blamed the technology.

[Courtney Armstrong]

That must be a cell phone tower pinging wrong. I was at the hospital. Oh my God, do you think I want to be out in the middle of the night any longer than I have to be? And so he just kept saying this to me to the point where I started feeling terrible. I felt guilty for questioning him.

[Andrea Gunning]

It's hard to look back on those moments because when you love someone and believe in their love for you, you accept answers. You believe.

[Courtney Armstrong]

After we learned about his true colors and what he was really doing, I asked him about that night and he said, yeah, I had met someone on the Internet and we arranged to meet at an exit close to the Air Force Academy. And that's where I was at. And you caught me.

[Andrea Gunning]

The data didn't lie. Joel did. This punctured Caroline's perception of her husband. She used to see him as a hero to their community. Now she sees him as nothing but a liar. As for that co worker Joel confessed to having sex with, the one he actually got the bruises from, Caroline found her number and texted her. And to her surprise, she responded. Tired of spills and stains on your sofa? Wash away your worries with Anibe. Anibe is the only machine washable clean sofa inside and out where designer quality meets budget friendly prices. That's right, sofas start at just $699. Enjoy a no risk experience with pet friendly stain resistant and changeable slip covers made with performance fabric Experience cloud like comfort with high resilience foam that's hypoallergenic and never needs fluffing. The sturdy steel frame ensures longevity and the modular pieces can be rearranged anytime. Shop washablesofas.com for up to 60% off site wide, backed by a 30 day satisfaction guarantee. If you're not absolutely in love, send it back for a full refund. No return shipping or restocking fees. Every penny back. Upgrade [e-mail] Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply. We've all heard the stories. Missing persons, double lives, suspicious basements. But here's one mystery you don't need in your life. Why can't my kid learn to ride a bike? For a lot of families, it turns into a saga. Meltdowns in the driveway, scraped knees and frustrated parents googling how to teach a kid to ride a bike without losing your mind. That's where Guardian Bikes comes in. Their bikes are lightweight, low to the ground and built to help kids find their balance fast. Most are riding confidently in just one day. No training wheels, no tears, just high fives and I did it moments. It's everything. Learning to ride should be simple, smooth and actually fun. So skip the struggle and start with a bike that's made to make it easy. Go to guardianbikes.com youm'll save hundreds when comparing Guardian to its competitors. Plus get a free bike lock and pump a $50 value with your first purchase when you join their newsletter. That's guardianbikes.com it's the early days of COVID April 2020. A woman in a small town in Oklahoma makes a strange post to Facebook and then disappears. I'm on day nine of this virus and I am pretty sure it has reached my lungs.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I made the decision at the onset that if it got bad enough I would not go to the hospital.

[Andrea Gunning]

Pretty quickly a ragtag group of women on the Internet start their own investigation.

[Courtney Armstrong]

It felt like I was living out one of like my fantasy dreams of being a detective.

[Andrea Gunning]

But the world they uncover is beyond their wildest imagination.

[Courtney Armstrong]

How did this happen?

[Andrea Gunning]

Listen to what happened to Talina czar on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Courtney Armstrong]

How could a beautiful young first grade teacher be stabbed 20 times, including in the bat, allegedly die of suicide? Yes, that was the medical examiner's official ruling. After a closed door meeting, he first named it a homicide. Why? What happened to Ellen Greenberg? A huge American miscarriage of justice. For an in depth look at the facts, see what happened to Ellen on Amazon. All proceeds to the national center for Missing and Exploited Children.

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline was able to make contact with the woman that Joel had an affair with at CSPD via text and she shared those texts with us.

[Courtney Armstrong]

And so I wrote hi, this is Caroline Kern, the wife of whose husband you've been fucking. I look forward to discussing your affair that you started and conducted during work hours with internal affairs investigators.

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline wanted the CSPD to know that this affair was going on during work hours on the taxpayer's dime. His former mistress responded, no, sorry, I.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Ended what he started because he said.

[Andrea Gunning]

He was leaving you and he was lying to everyone about himself. That was almost two years ago now. I don't know what has happened or.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Why he lost his job, but I'm.

[Andrea Gunning]

Not involved nor have I Talked to him since 2020ish. You should look at getting HIV and HPV tested after his being involved and all that. I'm really sorry for whatever's happened, but he is a total lying piece of.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Shit and you deserve better.

[Andrea Gunning]

Run. The woman may have been really sorry, but when my producer eventually contacted her, she didn't seem to have much sympathy for Caroline. What she did say, though, was illuminating. We recorded our conversation with the woman, and we've distorted her voice to protect her privacy. Wow. Yep.

[Courtney Armstrong]

She won't let this go, will she?

[Andrea Gunning]

She told us what she thought she knew about Caroline.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Everybody seems to know Carolyn and know what she like. Everybody says that she's kind of a problem, and I'm not sure what that means. I'm wondering how much of a background you've done on her, because from what I understand, it wasn't.

[Andrea Gunning]

And this is not coming from him.

[Courtney Armstrong]

From what I understand is that she was very controlling and.

[Andrea Gunning]

Not nice and.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Something with some other family members.

[Andrea Gunning]

She wouldn't let him talk to his.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Mom or something like that.

[Andrea Gunning]

This description went against everything we've heard about Caroline from her friends and family. And it helped us put together another piece of the puzzle. How Joel kept his double life a secret. You see, Colorado Springs isn't that big. One way to keep anyone from telling Caroline the truth was to paint her as the problem. And it seems like Joel did exactly that.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Did you ever meet his wife?

[Andrea Gunning]

No. This co worker turned mistress wasn't the only one who heard similar things about Caroline at the department. It seemed that everyone at CSPD knew Joel's wife was kind of a problem. Here's a former CSPD officer recalling Dan. Other officers, I think, that were much closer to him socially would always make.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Some comments about, like, maybe he had to get permission to just do anything with anyone else from her before he could do that. And, you know, she kind of wore.

[Andrea Gunning]

The pants in the house. That seemed to me to be somewhat common knowledge in the department. Joel's co worker was under the impression that he was leaving Caroline because that's what he told her. He lied to Caroline and he lied to his mistress, and eventually she figured it out. Previously, I told you about Joel having a mental health episode. He and Caroline were attending their son's high school sporting event. It should have been a fun time out, but Joel was distracted.

[Courtney Armstrong]

He became extremely withdrawn and very agitated. And so this is about 2019. Now, fast forward after our life blew up. He actually admitted to me why he was despondent and behaving the way he was. It was because had broken up with him. It wasn't anything to do with our son and driving and the concern or anything like that.

[Andrea Gunning]

The woman who texted Caroline saying, I ended what he started had ended Their relationship. Within a year of the affair, he planned an elaborate vow renewal. He stood before family and friends and professed his love for his wife.

[Courtney Armstrong]

First time around, we did church vows. This time around, we're going to speak from the heart. And so we're before our friends and family out in this beautiful setting on the beach. And when he gets ready to start his vows, he gets down on one knee and he says, you know, over 20 years ago, I impulsively asked you to marry me, and this time, I want to do it right. Would you marry me all over again? And has this new, big, beautiful ring. And it was just such a shock and a surprise animal. I felt like life was perfect.

[Andrea Gunning]

On the day of his revelations, what was once a cherished, loving memory was destroyed. Here's their son.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I was there firsthand, and I witnessed the whole vow renewal ceremony. But I don't think you can look at his actions now and say there could be any truth in it. Maybe he thought there was truth, but in his actions, absolutely not. It's just you feel betrayal and just kind of a phoniness to it. And so to me, there's no point in even thinking back on it because it was rooted in a lie.

[Andrea Gunning]

After April 11, as Caroline was going through Joel's emails, she found confirmation he had been sexting with someone just eight days after the vow renewal. It was with a person he'd met online. The person was asking for nudes. Instead. Joel sent them a selfie in it. He's staring at the camera. Lying back on the family couch. Caroline was so disturbed at the thought of their home being in Joel's pictures that she sold all the furniture in their living room. In the months before Joel was placed on leave, he could see the writing on the wall. He knew for months that he was being investigated at work, but he kept that to himself. While Caroline was reflecting on her dual realities, she told us about an experience that happened just months before D day. We weren't sure what to make of it, but it affected her so deeply. We wanted you to hear what happened.

[Courtney Armstrong]

In November of 2021, our daughter had left for school for something very early in the morning. Joel had told me that he, too, was going to go into work early that day and that he'd see me later that night. I'm still in bed. He comes and kisses me goodbye and tells me to have a great day. And I was asleep still. And when I woke up, I woke up just kind of feeling this heaviness on my chest.

[Andrea Gunning]

It was hard to Breathe. She was disoriented. Their daughter was already at school. Caroline was alone in the house.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Like, it was difficult to take a deep breath in. And my eyes were burning. And I heard this rumbling sound. Where is that coming from? Is that his truck? Is that his truck rumbling?

[Andrea Gunning]

Caroline's bedroom is on the first floor, just down the hallway from the garage.

[Courtney Armstrong]

And so I got up, and the auxiliary door to our garage was just a little open. And when I opened was like a rush of fire almost hit my face. Just kind of this warmth just hit me. The truck had been left running in our garage. I was panicked and didn't know what to do. And so I hit the garage open, and I went out to the driveway. And I'm kind of walking around trying to get my sense about me, and I'm trying to take a big, deep breath in, and, you know, I'm finally able to gather my bearings. And I go over to open his truck to shut the engine off, and I can't open it. It's locked.

[Andrea Gunning]

So she ran back into the house to get the spare key.

[Courtney Armstrong]

We have a key ring holder where we put all our keys. His police car was gone. Our daughters were gone, but his truck keys were hanging there. And so I got the truck keys down. I was able to open the truck. I opened the truck, and I turn off the engine, and I'm sitting there for a second, and I'm like, what the heck just happened?

[Andrea Gunning]

She had no idea how long the exhaust from Joel's truck had been seeping into the house. Caroline called Joel, flustered and upset.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I said, you left the truck running with the garage door closed and the door between the garage and the house just a little open. And he said, I did. And I said, yeah, you did. And he was like, well, there's no way I did that. And I said, how would that happen then? Then he started saying that his truck keys must have been in his pocket, and he must have accidentally hit the auto start when he was pulling away in his cop car in the morning. I said, there's no way you could have done that. Both sets of truck keys are hanging on the key ring. And so we went back and forth, and he had me convinced that it had to be a manufacturer defect or something. Something happened.

[Andrea Gunning]

If it was a defect, it was one that could have lethal consequences. They never figured out how the car started. Caroline now wonders if she had really been safe in her home. That brings us to Sunday, April 10, 2022. It was the day before their lives would change forever. Little Did Caroline know the two worlds she didn't realize she was living were about to converge? During this time, one constant for Caroline and the kids had been their faith. Here's Nicole.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I have my own little path, I suppose, with my religion. And so I was going to mass pretty frequently before that. This is something that the kids and I did together. He never went. He had always been a proclaimed atheist. And as our daughter and I are getting ready, he emerges and says he's.

[Andrea Gunning]

Going with us again. This was Sunday, April 10th, when Joel suddenly showed interest in going to church that day. Nicole was excited, and our daughter said.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Daddy, are you serious? You're really going to go to church with this? And he said, yes. I. I want to go with you guys. I want to be with you guys. And I think that maybe it's time I give church a chance. I thought, like, maybe this is the beginning of something new or something. I was really happy that he wanted to have family time.

[Andrea Gunning]

The family thought Joel may have been reconsidering his relationship with religion, but in reality, his secrets were teetering on the edge of exposure. When Nicole reflects on that day now, she sees Joel's desire to go to church in a completely different light.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Looking back on it, maybe it was his last resort to call upon the big man.

[Andrea Gunning]

I suppose call it a Hail Mary. Or maybe Joel wanted to remind the family about the virtue of forgiveness. But at the time, it felt like a lovely family.

[Courtney Armstrong]

Sunday, we went to breakfast together after church, and I still have silly pictures we took at the coffee shop we were at. We even went to Costco together. We just had this really good day together. And I just remember thinking to myself how thankful I was that Joel was wanting to be healthy and that maybe some of these changes that felt scary were about ready to be just really positive things for him.

[Andrea Gunning]

It was the last good day they'd ever have as a family. Joel's deception didn't just destroy his career, his marriage, or his family. They destroyed Caroline's memory of her entire adult life. Even the best memories, like the birth of her first child, are tainted forever. No memory is sacred.

[Courtney Armstrong]

You know, at random we'll see a picture and it's like, oh, gosh, there we were at Disney World together. And then my brain goes to God, that was such a great trip. But what were you doing when we weren't looking?

[Andrea Gunning]

On the next episode of Betrayal. We'll take you inside. CSPD Internal Affairs. On the day Joel's double life finally caught up with him.

[Courtney Armstrong]

The slip up proves that you're unable to keep track of all your lies and quite frankly I question how many other women are out there that may bring forward allegations in the future.

[Andrea Gunning]

The department finally realizes what they've got in lieutenant Joel Kern. But how do you catch a master manipulator in a lie? Thank you for listening to Betrayal Season four. If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal Team, email [e-mail] that's betrayalpodmail.com also please be sure to follow us on Instagram, etreyalpod and me andreah Gunning for all Betrayal content, news and updates. One way to support the series is by subscribing to our show on Apple Podcasts. Please rate and review Betrayal 5 star reviews. Help us know you appreciate what we do. Betrayal is a production of Glass Podcast, a division of Glass Entertainment Group in partnership with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive produced by Nancy Glass and Jennifer Faison. Betrayal is hosted and produced by me, Andrea Gunning, written and produced by Carrie Hartman, also produced by Ben Fetterman. Our associate producers are Caitlin golden and Kristin Melchiori. Our iHeart team is Ali Perry and Jessica Krynczyk. Story editing by Monique Labor Audio editing and mixing by Matt d' Alvecchio editing by Tanner Robbins. Special thanks to voice actors Caitlin golden and Rocky Alt and special thanks to Caroline and her family. Betrayal's theme is composed by Oliver Baines Music library provided by My Music and for more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. It's April 2020. A woman announces on Facebook that she has Covid and won't be seeking medical attention.

[Courtney Armstrong]

I didn't want to be talked out of this plan.

[Andrea Gunning]

Then she disappears. Anyone else think this is strange?

[Courtney Armstrong]

I just had to know how did this happen?

[Andrea Gunning]

Listen to to what happened to Talina zar on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Are you obsessed with True Crime?

[Courtney Armstrong]

Then you're gonna love True Crime Tonight.

[Andrea Gunning]

I'm Bodymovin. I'm Courtney Armstrong. And I'm Stephanie Lydecker. We've all worked together for years and now we're trying something brand new.

[Courtney Armstrong]

We're unpacking all the latest true crime headlines.

[Andrea Gunning]

We'll be covering all the major trials that are heating up this summer. And yes, we'll also be covering scandals that we're all obsessed with. He pulls out of his backpack, syringes. What? It's completely bizarre. Listen to True Crime tonight on the IHEARTRADIO app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts, you can get True Crime tonight completely ad free. That's with an iHeart True Crime plus subscription available exclusively on Apple Podcasts. So open your Apple Podcast app, search for iHeart True Crime plus and subscribe today.

[Courtney Armstrong]

How could a beautiful young first grade teacher be stabbed 20 times, including in the bat, allegedly die of suicide? Yes, that was the medical examiner's official ruling. After a closed door meeting, he first named it a homicide. Why? What happened to Ellen Greenberg, a human huge American miscarriage of justice. For an in depth look at the facts, see what Happened to Ellen on Amazon. All proceeds to the national center for Missing and Exploited Children.

[Andrea Gunning]

Hi guys, I'm Andrea Gunning, host of Betrayal. I'm excited to bring you all Season four, A Story of a Cop and His Double Life. I'm also excited to tell you that you can now get access to all episodes of betrayal season 1, 2, 3 and betrayal weekly and every single episode of betrayal season 4 ad free and one week early through the ihar true crime plus subscription available exclusively on Apple podcasts. Plus you'll get access to other chart topping true crime shows you love like the Real Killer, the Girlfriends, American Homicide, theringon, South Street, Burden of Guilt, Murder on Songbird Road, the Idaho Massacre, Paper Ghosts and more. So don't wait. Head to Apple Podcasts, search for I Heart True Crime plus and subscribe today.

[Courtney Armstrong]

This is an iHeart podcast.